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When You Count To Ten by JaysAndRavens
Fandoms: アグレッシブ烈子 | Aggressive Retsuko | Aggretsuko (Anime)
03 May 2023
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Summary
If you were to ask Retsuko to introduce herself to you, she would do so like this:
Hi, my name is Retsuko, and I work in Chararyman’s Accounting division! In my free time, I like to watch soap operas.
Yes, if you were to ask Retsuko to introduce herself to you, her first instinct would be to lie. But if you somehow engineered the technology to get inside her brain and pry out her real thoughts, you’d go to prison, because that is creepy. But before you condemned yourself to a monotonous life of iron bars and hooch wine, you might hear Retsuko describe herself a bit like this:
Hi, my name is Retsuko, and I work in Chararyman’s Accounting division. I’m overworked, passionless and I haven’t had a real hobby or friend since High School, and I think I’ll probably just keep up that way until I die. In my free time, I scream about how mad I am in random karaoke bars. I don’t really know what I’m doing.
This is because, in Retsuko’s eyes, a good personal introduction is one that sounds as if it were ripped straight from your high school’s foreign languages textbook. A good personal introduction is not an admission of your personal failings. A good personal introduction can never be the truth.