AsherB
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“Um.”
Robert looks like he just stumbled into a murder scene. Herm supposes it isn’t that far off. “W–I-I…Robert, my–I am.. So s-sorry. I–”
“You realize if you wanted to seduce me there were way better ways to go about it, right?” Robert says, lifting a brow, humorously uncertain.
OR Waterboy is feeling desperate after work, blessed with the house to himself. He gets a little overzealous. Who else to call but Robert?
Bookmarked by AsherB
12 Nov 2025
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I dunno man I just saw the new trailer and I’m Mauling Waterboy by Inhale_AAAAAA
Fandoms: Dispatch (Video Game)
22 Oct 2025
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“He’s going to torment this fucker. This guy who thinks just because he’s got the leash, he’s safe. He’s only safe because Robby is keeping an eye on them.
So Flambae just has to play along, play nice. Just for a little while, until Robby decides they don’t need supervision. Then he can do whatever he wants.”
Series
- Part 1 of Connected Trans Waterboy Polycule
Bookmarked by AsherB
04 Nov 2025
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Malfoy has a snake in his tent and asks Harry to come get rid of it.
Harry thinks he’s talking about his erection.
He is not.Bookmarked by AsherB
10 Jul 2025
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Fred and George nicked the Sorting Hat and cast a spell on it so that it would sort based on best possible shag. Harry is staggered when the hat places him in the same group as Draco Malfoy, Theodore Nott, and Blaise Zabini.
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- English
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- 6,907
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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- 4
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- 56
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- 2,735
- Bookmarks:
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Bookmarked by AsherB
11 Jun 2025
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I'm on the run (with you, my sweet love) by Lady_on_paper
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
23 Dec 2025
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Harry Potter was tired. After surviving the graveyard and going back to the Dursleys, it seems all his friends and godfather can say to him is "We'll talk when we meet, I can't say anything". He genuinely doesn't know if he can last another month like this. And if he doesn't get news, he'll find some for himself. So he decided to leave, just for a month. The only thing he wants is to breathe. Maybe for the last time.
Of course, nothing was ever easy for Harry - it really shouldn’t surprise him that he turns out to be a wanted criminal, acquires unholy ancient magic and becomes the third side of the war himself, not to mention the pretty blonde whom he picks up while he's on the run.
___
Or: a runaway (or vacationing) Harry Potter AU, that no one asked for.