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    The Accountant’s Guide to Taking Down an Evil Vampire Lord (and maybe bagging Astarion while you are at it) by

    Fandoms: Baldur's Gate (Video Games)  

    07 Nov 2024

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    “Fine,” she said. “Do you know the statistically most common way for the authorities to take out organized crime?”
    Well, if that was her idea of enticing conversation, it was no wonder she had all those evenings free to chase after scoundrels like him. Still, Astarion didn’t want to antagonize her further and ruin the game, so he pursed his lips and guessed, “A very large, well-placed cannon?”
    “Tax fraud.”
    She looked at him as if she expected some sort of reaction – maybe a dramatic gasp? A palm flung to his forehead in a theatrical rendition of How could I not think of this?
    Everything he could muster was a blink. “Tax … fraud.”
    She nodded, obviously excited about what Astarion was sure were two of the most boring words in the English language, combined.
    "That's how we'll take down Cazador."

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    04 Oct 2023