Sardonic
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Summary
Auri’s young. She’s innocent. Astarion’s not sure if she’s ever known another’s touch below the waist at all. When she rolls her hips, seeking any kind of pressure, it’s not intentional. He would balk at the idea under most circumstances. Sex is another form of torture. It might not be with her blood coursing through him.
He opens his mouth to entertain the idea–
And Auri’s body goes limp in his arms.
Astarion blinks. When he licks the blood from her neck, she doesn’t move. His chin is no doubt painted red. Panic swells in his breast, but Auri’s chest rises and falls. She’s not dead. She’s just an idiot. “Stupid girl,” Astarion whispers.
It’s for the best. He might have done something Auri would have regretted.
auri and astarion meet before the nautiloid ever flies over baldur's gate. and who wouldn't want to lose their virginity to a vampire?
Series
- Part 11 of we can live forever if you've got the time
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 56,957
- Chapters:
- 20/20
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- 1
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- 647
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Bookmarked by Sardonic
30 Jun 2025
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Astarion’s coming to your tent every night with honeyed nothings on his tongue. Trouble is, you’re starting to smell hints of bullshit. The closer y’all get, the further apart you feel. And then there’s the fucking brainworm cult.
These two losers must cheat, stab, and flirt their way to the heart of a cult. And to…whatever it is between them.
Series
- Part 3 of these two shitheads
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 186,577
- Chapters:
- 101/104
- Comments:
- 3,283
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- 2,945
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- 271
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- 111,241
Bookmarked by Sardonic
29 Dec 2024
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“You have to kiss Gale,” Shadowheart tells Halsin, glittering with mischief. “It’s the rules.”
Shadowheart and Astarion start a game. It escalates quickly.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 41,075
- Chapters:
- 7/7
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- 1
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- 477
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Bookmarked by Sardonic
15 Oct 2024
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Since Arryn learned the truth of his nature and the barest hint of his past, he’s been trying to endear himself to her by any means necessary. And considering the frequency of their… ethical disagreements, his personality alone likely won’t be enough to get him there. He’s made some subtle attempts to feel out her interest, and she’s always volleyed them right back with a wry comment and a knowing look. She never seems particularly impressed.
But if ever there were an opportunity to take the unsubtle approach and run with it as far as he could, it’d be right now.
An alternate timeline to Between friends, wherein I imagine how it would go between Astarion and my normally high-WIS druid, Arryn, if she’d been drunk enough to hook up with him all the way back at the tiefling party. And what would happen after, because nothing is ever that simple.
From Astarion’s POV.
Started as a one-shot, now a bigger multi-chapter thing. Slow burn after chapter one.
Series
- Part 1 of Cost/benefit
Bookmarked by Sardonic
08 Oct 2024
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“You're sure you’re ready for the role?” Nyssa teases. “Studied up? I can’t imagine there are too many books about infiltrating drow temples.”
Gale fiddles with his collar and leash, pinching it between his forefingers in a way that shouldn’t be distracting but is.
“Perhaps not specifically. You see, the problem about writing on drow society is one often does not make it up from the Underdark to hand pages to publisher. Of course there are many…less researched volumes. Of hapless men and leather-clad matrons. But I told Shadowheart I would be a gentleman, so that is all I will say on the more sordid parts of my education. You’ve nothing to fear.”
Bookmarked by Sardonic
01 Oct 2024