SlutaciousLestat



Recent works

Recent series

  1. Words:
    16,330
    Works:
    2
    Bookmarks:
    20
  2. Words:
    27,127
    Works:
    3
    Bookmarks:
    53

Recent bookmarks

  1. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Harry Potter, investigative reporter for the Daily Prophet, leads a perfectly adequate life. When he’s not trawling back-alleys for a juicy story, he’s playing tea party with his favourite niece or eating curry with his former house-elf. Draco Malfoy, renowned chef in muggle Paris, was perfectly content living a life of obscurity. But when his mother’s health begins to fail, he must return to wizarding London and face his past. When Harry gets an odd assignment to interview the enigmatic chef of the new muggle-wizard restaurant Le Cerf, he’s reunited with his childhood bully - and is reminded just how much a person can change in ten years. Hijinks, mystery, and food-related dirty talk ensue when Harry receives an anonymous tip of a blackmarket dragon trade and enlists Draco to be his concierge into the shady underworld of the wizarding elite.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    95,656
    Chapters:
    21/21
    Comments:
    397
    Kudos:
    471
    Bookmarks:
    213
    Hits:
    21,767

    31 Oct 2025

  2. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    After yet another trashy "unauthorised biography" is released, Harry decides to reclaim his story by writing his own version: the actual, unfiltered truth, to stop all the speculation and endless questions and finally set the record straight. Or at least officially Not Straight.

    Maybe there are a few truths he would have filtered a little more, if he’d known Draco Malfoy would be assigned to edit the book.

    Maybe there are a few truths he hasn’t quite worked out yet, that Draco Malfoy's patented blend of snarky criticism and thinly-veiled challenges might just be exactly what he needs to help him with.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    40,994
    Chapters:
    10/10
    Comments:
    168
    Kudos:
    655
    Bookmarks:
    195
    Hits:
    10,339

    25 Oct 2025

  3. Public Bookmark 35

    Tags
    Summary

    Astarion, somehow, stumbles into being the leader of the Tadfools. And among them is the Blade of Frontiers, a fey man who refuses to give out his name and has strong feelings about name safety in general. Astarion finds himself unusually attracted to this man, and he also finds snippets of Blade's story disturbingly relatable.

    But there's something he's forgetting. Something he can't recall; he's sure of it. If only he could remember.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    40,069
    Chapters:
    6/9
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    175
    Kudos:
    224
    Bookmarks:
    35
    Hits:
    2,854

    11 Oct 2025

  4. Public Bookmark 63

    Tags
    Summary

    Harry Potter had an obsession. That obsession was none other than Draco Malfoy. The man was gorgeous. Pretty blonde hair that curled around the backs of his ears, high cheekbones and flawless skin. Pink, plump lips that just begged to be kissed and bitten by Harry. His eyes were a steely grey that seemed to reflect every emotion within him. He was tall, but Harry was taller, and their body types were different.

    Where Harry was tall, broad and muscular; Draco was shorter, pale and lean. It made Harry want to pin him down and make him his, every time he saw the beauty that was Draco Malfoy.

    Unfortunately for Harry, other people have noticed, and Harry didn't like that. Nothing would stand in the way of him getting what he wanted.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,937
    Chapters:
    16/16
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    281
    Bookmarks:
    63
    Hits:
    5,607

    25 Sep 2025

  5. Public Bookmark 60

    Tags
    Summary

    "They won't kill Cazador," Sebastian says, quiet. "At least, not in time. They'll save the world first. And that breaks your protection and damns you back to the kennel."

    He leans in, smoke trailing from his hair. "Tell me they would," he murmurs. "Tell me right now whether you trust them to free you."

    Astarion can't meet his eyes.

    The party enters the shadowlands under less auspicious conditions, and finds the curse more hungry than anticipated. Before long, they are, too.

    It is three weeks to Reithwin, and something does not want Astarion to make it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    44,857
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    96
    Kudos:
    245
    Bookmarks:
    60
    Hits:
    4,055

    12 Sep 2025

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Wip, maybe