StopCallingMePastries



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    “Lyubimiy, do you want me to push the seat ba—?”

    “JUST FUCKING DRIVE, ILYA!” Shane shouted, effectively cutting him off with a roar as he fumbled for the handle along the Cherokees’ ceiling.

    OR: Babies are unpredictable. Especially those whose other father happens to be one, Ilya Hollander-Rozanov, the king of all wild cards.

    (And apparently the jack of all trades, midwifery now included.)

    Thank god Jeeps are made to Do Anything ®.

    +Now with art! (and an announcement)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,081
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    53
    Kudos:
    1,446
    Bookmarks:
    266
    Hits:
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    20 Sep 2026

  2. Public Bookmark 56

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    "I hate him."

    "You don't know him."

    "I know men like him, and therefore I hate him."

    "You hate change; there's a difference."

    "You and I both know he's going to come waltzing in here trying to change things that work perfectly well."

    We are pleased to announce that our new Chief Medical Officer will be Doctor Jack Abbot.

    ****

    Jack Abbot joins PTMC as their new CMO, and Robby refuses to like him. Except the more time Robby spends around Jack, the more he can't help but like it. Not that he'll make things easy on Jack. What would be the fun in that?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,522
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    24
    Kudos:
    304
    Bookmarks:
    56
    Hits:
    1,590

    20 Sep 2026

  3. Public Bookmark 14

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    “You staying hydrated?”

    “100%. I'm doing everything right. It's everything around me that's all fucked up. It's that patient from the water slide with the tib-fib amputation—”

    “Wait a minute.” Robby’s hands came up in mock placation. “Is this a panic attack because of your leg issues?”

    or

    Rewrite of 2x10. Instead of Mohan having a panic attack, it's Abbot.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,520
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    162
    Bookmarks:
    14
    Hits:
    2,165

    20 Sep 2026

  4. Public Bookmark 67

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    “Oxygen is 94%. Blood pressure 100/64.” Parker announced. Dana walked around the bed, holding an emesis bag close to Jack’s mouth, suction within arm’s reach.

    “That’s low for him.” Robby muttered, almost to himself.

    “Those are normal vitals.” Parker tried to reassure him.

    “They’re low for him, I take his blood pressure every morning.” Robby bit out.

    Every head turned to look at him. Robby could feel a subtle flush crawling up his neck and his cheeks.

    Or

    Jack accidentally is dosed with the sedative during a Code Hula Hoop and Robby just announced to the entire staff they’ve been secretly dating.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,125
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    826
    Bookmarks:
    67
    Hits:
    6,629

    19 Sep 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    A case study of:
    What exactly happens, when a 54-year-old Chief ER Attending realizes he might be into men. Or- precisely: One man.
    What if he panics about it for several weeks just to discover he seems to have a praise kink on top of everything else?

    Spoiler: Jack Abbot happens.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,380
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    111
    Kudos:
    1,174
    Bookmarks:
    229
    Hits:
    14,650

    13 Sep 2026