fifi9573
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- Haikyuu!! (1)
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Summary
Takayanagi Kyoichiro swears he's not suicidal, he's simply a suicide enthusiast. He can admit, however, that suicide via carbon-monoxide poisoning might have been more pleasant than getting flattened by a 600-pound truck.
Ah, well, he's here anyway, he might as well enjoy the happy retirement life he didn't get to have before.
Unfortunately, he has landed right in the middle of wartime, and there are homicidal ninja coming in for his advice. Just because he was a high school counselor and teacher who knew how to deal with emotionally unstable teenagers doesn't mean he actually enjoys the job, so please go away, thank you.
TLDR; A former assassin-turned-ethics-teacher reincarnates into a world of ninjas and decides to enjoy retirement. However, these trigger-happy ninja won't leave him alone...
Series
- Part 1 of Original work-verse
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 93,067
- Chapters:
- 21/?
- Comments:
- 892
- Kudos:
- 2,481
- Bookmarks:
- 1,034
- Hits:
- 55,846
Bookmarked by fifi9573
03 Feb 2026
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The Yondaime Hokage was officially known to have the shortest reign in the history of all Hokage's, and non-officially known as having the most gruesome death. 'Ripped apart by the Kyuubi's tails' was right next to 'forceful extraction of Biju' and 'stray Uzumaki decides to fuck with you' on most shinobi's please-oh-God-don't-let-me-die-like-this list.
But here's a less official tidbit; Namikaze Minato's body was never recovered, not close to Uzumaki Kushina's cooling body nor his wailing son. Konoha was left to bury an empty casket, and his guards plus a little scraggly teenager with a shock of grey hair were left only with his kunai to mourn.
So it quite understandably causes a ruckus when the same dead Yondaime suddenly pops up 12 years after his supposed death.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 16,088
- Chapters:
- 11/?
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 224
- Kudos:
- 1,012
- Bookmarks:
- 258
- Hits:
- 20,144
Bookmarked by fifi9573
02 Feb 2026
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Summary
Haruno Sakura is a perfectly normal little three-year-old girl. Sure, she has candy pink hair instead of her papa’s maroon or her mama’s sandy blonde, but she’s normal! And maybe her green eyes are more frigid and lime than her mama’s evergreen or papa’s navy, but she swears she’s normal! She’s a terrifyingly literate, sharp-minded little girl whose eyes see what others don’t and who talks to things that aren’t there.
But her parents love her. Her see-through friends adore her. Her family employees coo at her.
Which is why no one bats an eye when the Haruno princess asks to go find the last Senju and make her Hokage since the current one and his administration suck doodoo.
Bookmarked by fifi9573
30 Jan 2026
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Summary
Sakura and Sasuke wake up in their five-year-old bodies and decide to make it everyone else’s problem.
Or..
Dear Mama and Papa (and Uchiha-samas),
Sasuke-kun and I have decided to run away and get married. We’ll be back as soon as we save the world!
Bookmarked by fifi9573
30 Jan 2026
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Summary
Sakura sips the tea with the palate of a killer. It really does taste better with blood congealing on the side of the cup.
Or: Tsunade, fraught with enough ghosts already, declines Sakura's request. Shizune, knowing all too well the difficulty of competing with them, takes her on instead.
Bookmarked by fifi9573
29 Jan 2026