hyperbolic
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Summary
When The Angel looks back at her, his eyes are wide with panic. “You said your kid was waiting for you at the museum?”
She nods wordlessly.
The Angel swallows. “Fuck.”
“What.”
“A bomb exploded at the National Gallery of Art.”
Kristin’s heart stops.OR: hero phil and villain kristin accidentally save the wrong kid (and they'll have to keep that wrong kid until further notice)
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Pogchamp Through The Apocalypse Let's Go by hyperbolic
Fandoms: Minecraft (Video Game), Dream SMP
20 Mar 2023
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Summary
What happens when you put
1. A tired retail worker
2. A depressed suicidal dumbass
3. A sheltered christian boy with anger issues
4. And a child so unhinged he should be tested for rabies.A fuck ton of gratuitous violence in the middle of the apocalypse of course!
(And maybe a bit of found family but shhhh that comes later.)
OR: SBI are all deranged in their own special ways. Honestly, the zombie apocalypse doesn't stand a chance.
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Phil has almost died so many times—the world has almost ended so many times too—it’s kind of lost all its novelty. Now, at twenty-seven years old and freshly retired, he can finally rest.
Let the new generation handle this new era of super powered villains. The crazy scientists and the aliens from far away. The weekly apocalypse, the occasional doomsday device.
His plan goes out the window when local superhero Shazam breaks into his apartment with a stab wound and wait a minute- Shazam is actually twelve? And wait a minute! Red Hood and Deadpool are just teenagers?! WHO IS PARENTING THESE KIDS?!
OR: Three vigilantes come crashing into retired superhero Philza's life with no parental supervision and enough bad decisions to throw him into cardiac arrest. If no one is going to parent these kids then HE will!
Series
- Part 1 of following the law is kinda sus ngl
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The twins, nearing three, had no idea they were being abused for work and it’s not like their parents cared that much either. In the future they would come to fully realize just how fucked that had been, but at the time they were too young to protest, they hadn’t even said their first word yet.
Unfortunately for both Techno and Wilbur they would not think twice of this abuse until later. What's more, they would not come to truly appreciate Phil for the saving grace that he was until even later.
The twins are child stars, abused and overworked. Their decades long venture into stardom is littered with a small handful of very brief but very significant meetings with Phil, the only person in their lives who cared enough to like them for who they were.
Series
- Part 1 of The Glare Of The Spotlight
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A Con Artist, A Mafia Boss, An Arsonist, A Hitman and A Delinquent Cause A Scene Outside Of A Bar by hyperbolic
Fandoms: Minecraft (Video Game), Dream SMP
05 Dec 2022
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Summary
Kristin needs a mortgage for her money laundering scheme.
Phil wants alibis who won’t ask any questions.
Wilbur needs a landlord that will overlook his felonies.
Techno requires a good washer and dryer that can clean blood easily.
Tommy wishes CPS would get off his ass.
Each with their own agendas, flaws and secrets, these five are pushed with the common goal of needing to come together as a family in order to evade the law.
Or: SBI need to pretend to be a family in order to avoid the police's suspicions.
Series
- Part 1 of A Con Artist Universe
Recent series
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- Words:
- 9,483
- Works:
- 1
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Summary
SBI need to pretend to be a family in order to avoid the police's suspicions.
Hilarity ensues
- Words:
- 109,148
- Works:
- 3
- Bookmarks:
- 192