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The normal thing to do would be to turn to Paul for a kiss, right? It’s not a big deal, it wouldn’t mean anything. He’d just kissed two of his mates and it meant nothing, so why not just turn to Paul and make a big stupid joke out of the whole thing? Play up the fact they’d come stag. Turn it into a laugh.
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New Years Eve 1968. At the toll of midnight, everybody is drunk and kissing each other. Except, when faced with Paul, John freezes.Bookmarked by komioromen
16 Jun 2026
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Paul has always been sort of vaguely aware of the fact that he loves John, in the same way that he’s aware that John loves him, in the same way that he’s aware that it doesn’t matter. He knows that they can’t be together – they can’t be queer – so it’s not worth dwelling on, is it?
If he thinks about it too deliberately, it hurts. So he doesn’t think about it.
It would have been perfectly fine going on that way. He might have done it his entire life with ease, even. It would have been fine, it not for the fact that one day he just – forgets, for a moment. And he kisses him.
Bookmarked by komioromen
10 Jun 2026