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When the bell rings at exactly 8:15 am, just as it does every single day, just as it has every single one for the past three years David’s spent at this job, he can’t help but wonder how, of all the places in the world, he ended up teaching at Schitt’s Creek high school. It’s not that this is the worst job he could’ve had — quite honestly, all things considered, it’s a pretty good gig.The school is at a humble ten minute drive from his apartment, the staff is small enough that he can usually comfortably pick his courses, and David will admit, if absolutely hardpressed about it, that maybe, maybe he finds a modicum of self-satisfaction in being a tenured resident of the Schitt’s Creek High English Department.
But still — 8-fucking-15 am.
OR
David Rose is a high school teacher. A new substitute shows up one day, and it absolutely doesn't ruffle any of his feathers at all. Not even a little. Because he's a seasoned professional.
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01 Jan 2024
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In which David has to fix up the general store building before he can open Rose Apothecary. While making trips to Rona to get supplies for the projects he thinks he can DIY, he meets Patrick: snarky MBA student who hates his fucking job.
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16 Sep 2023
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“I know our relationship isn’t boring. I know you’re happy, but, maybe… maybe I do get a little worried, sometimes, that—now that we’re at this point—that we’ve settled. Sometimes I wonder if you think… it’s too calm. Too predictable.”
David frowns. “I absolutely think that.”After the ropes course, Patrick needs some closure about a certain magazine quiz.
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21 Jun 2023
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“There’s something I need to tell you.”
David frowns at the reflection of Patrick in the bathroom mirror. “Uh-oh.”
“No, not like that. I just need to warn you about something.”
David turns to frown at the actual Patrick standing next to him. “Uh-oh.”David learns that Patrick's love comes with a disclaimer.
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21 Jun 2023
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“Hypothetically, David. Not about us, not about me. Just as a concept. Conceptually, what do you think about marriage?”
David swallows. “Why?”
“Because it’s what you do.” Patrick goes back to his laundry, goes back to folding his fucking underwear like he didn’t just corner David halfway into a panic attack. “When you’re in a relationship, at some point, you gotta have The Talk. It’s not a plan; it’s just to see if you’re on the same page.”
David sniffs, hoping it comes across as unimpressed. “Sounds fake.”David’s never really thought much about marriage. He’s never had a reason to, before.
Patrick gives him a reason.
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21 Jun 2023