oatmealjumper



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Shane has a oral fixation and autism that causes him to hyper fixate even more. One night, Shane and Ilya are on their couch at the cottage, Ilya playing video games with his teammates over voice chat and Shane on his phone. When Ilya begins shifting around on the couch, Shane takes notice of the bulge in Ilya's shorts. What follows is Shane desperately needing to satisfy his oral fixation, and Ilya being the greatest boyfriend possible.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,651
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    29
    Kudos:
    1,328
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    235
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    15,615

    21 Mar 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Out of all Ilya’s terrible vices, repeatedly hiring the same escort might be the stupidest one he’s ever picked up.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,920
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    204
    Kudos:
    4,100
    Bookmarks:
    834
    Hits:
    36,462

    15 Mar 2026

  3. Public Bookmark 11

    Words:
    6,827
    Works:
    2
    Bookmarks:
    11

    04 Mar 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Shane’s eyes snap open. Wait a second.

    “Ilya,” Shane says, propping himself up on his elbows. “Ilya, wake up.”

    Ilya makes a pained noise, eyes still shut. “I shut curtains already.”

    “It’s not that. Ilya, hey. Don’t go back to sleep.” Ilya tries to bury back into Shane’s chest, but adrenaline knifes through Shane’s hangover long enough for him to peel Ilya off and roll him into his back. Ilya blinks blearily up at him, starfished in the sheets. Beautiful and naked and missing his mother’s cross.

     

    OR: When Ilya’s cross goes missing after the Centaurs celebrate their first Stanley Cup win, Shane is determined to get it back. And so are the Centaurs. And the rest of Ottawa.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,038
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    480
    Kudos:
    14,701
    Bookmarks:
    3,104
    Hits:
    84,577

    24 Feb 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “I’m sorry, but my answer is no. Someone else might be willing to switch if you ask.”

    “I can’t believe—this is unacceptable! I’m going to call the flight attendant over and get this sorted out right now!”

    Flustered and cornered, Shane injects his Captain Voice into the conversation. “Ma’am, I understand that you’re upset, but I paid for this seat and am going to stay here. You’ll have to find someone else willing to change places or just fly with the seat you booked. I’m sorry I couldn’t help you.”

    She hisses like a goddamn tea kettle, and starts to say, “You are the most selfish man I’ve ever—” when another voice behind her says, “You are blocking my seat. Move.”

    Shane and the woman turn to assess the new arrival. It turns out that his seat partner is well above six feet tall, ripped as hell, and knows how to deliver an excellent bitch face. He’s also the hottest man that Shane has ever seen in real life, including a chance run-in with Jensen Ackles at a Stars game.

    Or, still!famous Shane meets non!famous Ilya on a cursed flight from Ottawa to Boston and kind of (totally) falls in love with him at first sight (and first chirp)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,624
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    11
    Comments:
    438
    Kudos:
    14,700
    Bookmarks:
    3,386
    Hits:
    108,967

    21 Feb 2026