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Jason always knew how to handle Dick. No matter what happened, no matter the trauma of the day, or the nightmare of the week, Jason knew how to take care of Dick. Dick was his omega, and Jason was his alpha, they were linked. They had a bond forged through fire and blood, over years of disaster and mayhem. They knew each other, and because of this Jason always knew what to do about Dick, even when Dick was five months pregnant, and subjecting Jason to some of the worst mood swings Jason had ever seen.
"I want rocky road ice cream and jalapeño cheetos, but I want the ice cream to be partially melted, and I want the cheetos mixed in," Dick said to Victor, who was staring at him like he'd grown a second head.
"Uh..." he trailed off. Dick raised an eyebrow, and Jason could see the freak out bubbling just beneath the surface. If Dick didn't get his ice cream and cheetos in the next five minutes he would lose his mind, and then Victor would really have something to worry about.
"We have the stuff in the kitchen," Jason said from his position in the reclining chair. Dick had had that particular craving before, multiple times. So many times, in fact, that Jason thought it would simply be better if he kept the ice cream and cheetos well stocked.
"Right," Victor said, stumbling over himself to get to the kitchen. Jason tried not to laugh at him as he went. He was currently living the dream. Roy and Victor were over at he and Dick's apartment, and Dick was using them to his full advantage. It gave Jason both a night off, and the perfect entertainment.
Roy walked in the door, he'd taken Dick's laundry down to the laundry room in their apartment. Jason didn't know how Dick did it, but he was seriously considering asking him.
"Need anything else?" Roy asked. It was funny to see them both like this. They, and almost all the alpha's Dick and Jason knew, had been torn between treating Dick with kid gloves and letting him take care of himself ever since he'd gotten pregnant. Dick had made it abundantly clear that if any of them did something for him without asking, they'd have their ass handed to them, no matter what their instincts said, however they couldn't quite shake the habit, and so Dick was retaliating by making them do things for him. Maybe it wasn't ethical, but Dick with pregnancy hormones was not someone to question.
"No," Dick said to Roy, and turned back the television so he could continue to watch his show. Roy nodded, and went into the kitchen, probably to help Victor.
"Hey, babe," Jason said suddenly. Dick turned to him. Jason knew he had to be cautious here, Dick wouldn't hesitate in biting his head off either.
"Yes?"
"Maybe go a little easier on them, they're only trying to help," he said. Dick narrowed his eyes, but Jason just cocked an eyebrow in return. Dick sighed.
"If they'd stop treating me like a five year old, I'd stop treating them like indentured servants. That's the way it works," he said.
"I know, babe, I know. But you're taking advantage of their stupidity."
"As I should be," Dick sniffed.
"And you're only perpetuating the stereotype." Jason knew he had him then. Dick shot him a side eyed glare, but chose not to respond. Shortly after, Victor returned with the bowl of the horrifying ice cream-cheetos mix, Roy trailing right behind him.
"Here you go, Dick," Victor said, setting the bowl down. Dick picked it up and inspected it carefully. He had Victor and Roy caught, one wrong morsel and there'd be hell to pay.
"Thank you," Dick said finally, and settled in to eat his ice cream contentedly. The tension seeped out of Victor and Roy so quickly that they practically deflated. Jason swallowed a smile, and went back to watching TV.
---
A little while later Dick finally finished his ice cream. The moment he set the spoon down in the bowl, Roy shot up out of his seat, and made his way over.
"I can take that," he said, reaching to grab the bowl out of Dick's hands. Dick snatched it back.
"No, I've got it," he said, venom creeping into his tone. Roy, the idiot, didn't seem to hear it.
"No, you sit, I'll take it." Roy once again reached for the bowl, but Dick snatched it out of reach, fire and fury in his eyes
"I said I've got it Roy," he snapped. "What, do you think I'm too delicate to put my own dirty bowl in the sink? Do you think, 'oh, poor pregnant omega, can't even get up off the couch,' well I've got some news for you, you alpha asshole, I can do my own God damn dishes!" Dick roared. Jason swallowed another smile at the sight of Roy's stricken expression.
"N-no, that's not what I-" Roy stammered, but Dick cut him off.
"Out of my way!" He snapped. Roy practically leapt out of the way, and let Dick storm off in the direction of the kitchen. When he was out of ear shot, Jason cackled at Roy and Victor.
"Oh, you poor innocent souls," Jason laughed. "Never underestimate Dick Grayson."