Work Text:
Day 5 – Happy // Sad
~Happy~
A bird was chirping in a tree outside. Why? It was raining, so why was this bird happy? Noé didn't know, but he was also in a very good mood. And he was nervous.
The woman next to him grabbed his hand. „It will be alright“, she whispered and Noé knew that she was crying. But he couldn't help her. He couldn't even help himself at the moment.
At least he stopped trembling because of Domi, because she was someone he knew almost his whole life long. And well, he knew Vanitas for a long, long time too. But actually Vanitas was the problem.
„He's late!“, Noé cried out desperately.
The little church wasn't full of people – they only wanted a small marriage. The only guests were Domi, her parents, her grandpa and well, Jeanne.
The young woman was sitting awkwardly on one of the benches, looking down. She and Domi broke up some time ago and it was the first time they met again and they didn't even greet each other. Noé just couldn't understand them.
„Domi? Don't you even want to say 'Hello' to her?“
Domi shook her head. „It hurts, you know? Seeing her now, after 5 months... I don't know... it still hurts... I still love her and...“
Noé didn't want to tell her that she spoke loud enough for everyone to hear, but luckily Jeanne didn't say anything, even though Noé could see her tears.
They still loved each other, so why didn't they talk...? Noé would surely find a way for them to get together one more time.
And then, suddenly the door opened and there he was.
And Noé forgot how to breath.
Vanitas wore a white suit and a dark blue tie. His hairs were normal, in a ponytail, but they were a little curly.
He was so beautiful.
They looked at each other for a long time.
Vanitas father stood next to him, proudly looking to his son. Noés heart beat so fast and he wanted to run over to him and hug and kiss him like he always did when he came home after work.
But he couldn't. He had to wait until they were allowed to.
Noé could wait. It would be the best kiss of his life.
~Sad~
„Even if you kill me, Noé, I won't die, you know?“
I looked at him, my heart hurt so much, my whole body hurt but this man wasn't supposed to live.
It hurt so much, it hurt, it hurt, it hurt.
The sword in my hand was trembling – no, I was trembling.
He wasn't supposed to be here, he would kill everyone without even knowing about it.
„How do you... mean this?“, I breathed out, I couldn't talk. It was like in a nightmare, when there was someone who wanted to kill you and you wanted to scream, but just couldn't.
But this was even worse than a nightmare.
He walked over to me, a grin on his face. How could he grin in a situation like this?
Where did that smile come from?
This man was a mystery.
„I'll live in your brain and your heart, in your memories and in your dreams, mon chéri.“
When I heard him saying that I broke down to the floor, dropping the sword.
I had to kill him, I had to, I had to, I had to but I fucking couldn't do it.
He knew it all time long. He knew it.
It took a long time until I realized my feelings for him. The jealousy I felt when I heard that Jeanne had drunk his blood and I didn't, it was the first sign.
And when he said this 'mon chéri', something inside of me died, because I wanted to call him that, I wanted to tell him everything.
He knelt down next to me, his hand was on my back.
„I won't disappear, mon chéri.“
„Don't call me that if you don't mean it...!“ His hand was warm and my fist hit the floor, again and again.
„I do mean it, Noé. I know I have to die. I could just kill myself, you know? Then... you don't have to do it.“
I shook my head, stood up and pulled him with me. And into a hug.
I could feel him breathing, I could feel everything of his body, even his nose pressing into my collarbone.
„Noé. I really do mean it. Let me tell you one thing, before someone kills me, ok? Please...“
My sobbing got even worse.
„Vanitas, I don't believe you. I can't. You just don't want to die... I'm sorry...“
„Noé...“ He also began to cry and I almost fell because his whole weight was on me and I knew that I would carry it forever.
„Noé... I love you, damnit I really do and I don't want to die because you gave my life a purpose and I didn't want this purpose!“
I pushed him away, looked in his eyes and drowned in them, grabbing the sword again.
My heart was stinging and I wondered why it didn't stop beating.
„Vanitas. You... you don't love me, you love Jeanne and... this isn't right at all...“
„Why can't you just believe me?!“ He almost screamed, then reached out his hand to take mine and I even allowed him. I hated myself for this.
„Because... because it would be too good and in the next second I have to kill you, I...“
This despair inside of me almost killed me. „Noé. I love you. I love you. I love yo-“
„Shut up!“, I cried out, letting go of his hand. The tip of my sword touched his heart, but I was still trembling and so I wounded him just a little bit, but he stood still.
„I love you.“
I couldn't kill him, not when he was saying this. Tears ran down my cheeks, I couldn't stop crying, he was so beautiful, his eyes shone blue, his skin looked like porcelain and his hairs were a waterfall in the night.
„I love you.“
„Please shut up, Vanitas... please...“
He breathed in and then out.
„Noé? Will you at least give me a goodbye-kiss? And tell me that you love me too?“
He sounded like a little child and god, I couldn't stand him.
I had to kill him. I had to, but I couldn't.
„Just do it Noé. Get over with it, there's no other way out.“
And out of a reflex I did it.
And in the next second I regretted it. Blood was everywhere, blood on my clothes, on my face, on his face, his clothes, his legs, his arms, his chest, his feet, his left hand, his right hand that I had just held, it was on the floor.
Louis.
Louis almost died the same, he was covered in blood, I was covered in blood.
And his scream made me shudder so hard, I almost threw up, he fell and I ran over to him.
His eyelids sank down, the wound wasn't deep enough to kill him right away, he was in pain, he was in pain and I was the cause.
„Vanitas... I'm... I'm sorry... I...“ I felt sick. I wanted to throw up right away, but I didn't, he would die and I couldn't believe it.
„Noé...“ He tried to touch my cheek, but he was to weak and without even tinking I leaned down to kiss him.
I could feel his lips turning into a tiny smile.
I broke away from him, he almost didn't breath anymore, he was in so much pain that he couldn't even feel this pain anymore.
„Vanitas. I love you too.“ When I said this I pulled him towards me, I didn't care about the blood.
I knew it was the right decision. I knew it, deep inside me, but it felt so wrong.
I practically saved all vampires, but my life would never be the same and I didn't even know how to live on without him.
Without his smiles and laughter.
„Noé...“ It was nothing more than a whisper disappearing in the wind.
„I'm here, Vanitas. I love you. I'm here.“
His last words broke Noé. They broke him and he could even feel himself breaking apart, into pieces that could never be fixed again.
„I really love you.“