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Emma collapsed onto the couch with a groan. It had been a long few days, between trying to stop the Evil Queen, helping everyone who had arrived from the Land of Untold Stories, and dealing with visions of her death and the shaking hands that came with it. Ever since Hyde had revealed to Emma that saviors never got a happy ending, she felt like she had been constantly looking over her shoulder, waiting for all the happiness she had found to be ripped away. There hadn’t been very many quiet moments lately (not that there ever was in Storybrooke) and all of it was beginning to take a toll on her.
The sound of footsteps filled the quiet, making their way from upstairs to the living room where Emma was. With a small smile on her lips, Emma had to admit that there had been some good moments mixed in with the bad. Killian had been given a second chance at life after Zeus delivered him back from the dead and they were both determined to make the most of it. When she had first found out her fate, Emma was afraid to have Killian move in with her; how could she invite him to share a life with her and then rip away his happy ending? But if she was fated to die, Emma wanted to share every moment she could with him; she couldn’t let her fear of the future stop her from living her life right now. For so long Emma had been afraid of taking the next step with Killian but now that she knew what it was like to lose him, she didn’t want to waste any more time.
“Well love,” he said as he came to sit beside her, “all of my possessions have been put away, so I believe I am officially moved in.” He smiled as he said this, one side of his mouth quirking up a little higher and his eyes crinkling a bit at the corners.
Emma smiled back, thinking of the sea chest he had taken with him that contained his most treasured items. It made her heart ache a little, that he had been alive for about 300 years and the items he cared about most could be stored in one chest.
(Not that she was one to talk, having arrived in Storybrooke with only a few boxes herself; it was one of the many reasons they understood each other so well. Kindred spirits, indeed).
“Where’s Henry? I thought he said he’d be joining us tonight?” Killian inquired, pulling Emma from her thoughts.
“He was going to, but with everything that happened today with Jekyll and Hyde, he thought Regina might need him” Emma explained. “Plus,” she added with a smirk, “he said he was afraid we might scar him for life if he stays here during our first night together, so he said he’d give us a few days and check back in.”
Killian chuckled, and then gave her a smoldering look. “And how exactly would we scar him for life, Swan?”
“Well,” Emma said coyly, “I’m sure it wouldn’t take much. Even us kissing would probably do it.”
“Hmm, like this you mean,” Killian whispered as he leaned over and pressed his lips against hers.
Emma let out a soft sigh of contentment as she melted into him. At first the kiss was sweet, but after a few minutes it became more desperate. Emma crawled into his lap, tangling one hand in his hair and placing the other over his heart while keeping her lips fused to his. Sliding her hands to the front of his shirt, Emma started to undo the buttons when his lips left hers. She huffed in frustration but turned it into a moan as he latched onto her neck, scraping it with his teeth and then soothing the mark with his tongue. She closed her eyes and let her head drop back to give him better access, enjoying the rough drag of his beard against her skin. After a few minutes, he stopped, dropping his head against the back of the couch, his pupils dilated to the point that his eyes looked black. As Killian got his breath back, Emma’s eyes drifted down and noticed his shirt sleeves had been pushed up somehow, revealing the tattoo on his right arm that honored his first love and…
What was that above the brace for his hook? It looked like another tattoo peeking out from underneath his sleeve. Emma was curious; he had never mentioned another tattoo. Maybe it was one for his brother Liam?
“What’s this?” she asked as her fingers started to trace over the little bit of the design she could see. Killian looked down to see what she was referring to and became very still.
“Oh, that,” Killian said in a bright voice that tried to hide the tension underneath. “That’s just a tattoo I got.”
“Can I see it?”
Killian seemed reluctant at first but then he nodded his head. “Aye love, of course.”
Emma pushed up his sleeve to reveal the rest of his tattoo.
It was a compass, but not just any compass. It was an exact replica of the compass they had travelled up a beanstalk together to find. Emma would know it anywhere; how many times had she thought about that moment when he had asked to see it with so much awe for her in his voice, followed by the betrayal when she chained him up? Reaching out, Emma slowly ran her fingers around the outside of the tattoo, taking in the gold-bronze color at the edge that surrounded the silver where all the compass markings were. She looked up into Killian’s eyes and could see him looking back with an apprehensive look.
“This is the compass we stole from the giant.” It wasn’t a question.
Killian took a deep breath before nodding his head. “Aye, love, that it is.”
“When did you get it?”
“I got it during the year we were in the Enchanted Forest, after Pan’s curse.”
Emma was about to ask him why, when she noticed something. When she thought of a compass, she always thought of the arrow pointing north but the arrow on Killian’s tattoo was pointing off to the side, towards Killian himself. It was almost like it was pointing straight at Killian’s heart.
“Why isn’t the arrow pointing north?” As soon as she asked, she could tell Killian had been hoping she wouldn’t but she also knew he wouldn’t lie to her about it either.
“Well love,” he said slowly, like he was reluctant to tell her, “after we arrived in the Enchanted Forest, I tried to go back to the pirate that I used to be, thinking it would ease the pain of losing you.” Here, he paused for a moment, the memories of the lonely nights and heartache overtaking him. “It didn’t quite work though; after the incident with Ariel, I realized I couldn’t go back to being that man, the one who was selfish and thought only of himself. You changed me, love, and even though you weren’t around I wanted to try to be the kind of man you deserved. So I decided to get this tattoo, to remind me of what kind of man I could be, and that out there was someone who believed I could be a part of something.”
Emma looked at him, still not entirely sure where he was going with this.
“There’s a second part of the tattoo on my chest, right over my heart. The compass reminds me where to look to find the man I can be, the second part reminds me of why I want to be that man.”
“Can I see the second part?” Emma had a feeling it was this part of the tattoo that was making him so nervous but she couldn’t figure out why. Killian nodded his head with a look of grim determination on his face.
Emma reached up and undid a few more buttons so she could push his shirt aside. When she saw the second part, she gasped, her free hand covering her mouth and tears filling her eyes.
It was a swan. It was a simple tattoo, with black ink taking the shape of the bird; the beak connecting to the head, curving into the graceful arch of the neck. From there, the ink swirled into the body, reminiscent of feathers, curving up to form a wing raised as if the swan was about to soar into the sky. It was beautiful but that wasn’t what made Emma so emotional. It was the word written underneath the swan in an elegant script that had her feeling like her heart was going to burst.
Emma.
She looked up and could see Killian watching her, waiting for her reaction. “You got this tattoo for me?” she asked in a dazed voice.
“Aye,” was all he said (just like when he told her he traded his ship, his home, for her).
Emma waited for her walls to slam up like they normally did when anyone hinted at something of a more permanent nature but she didn’t feel any fear. Instead, the overwhelming feeling she had was love for this man; for so long Emma had been alone, not willing to trust her heart with anyone. She had closed herself off from love to protect herself from getting hurt again, had pushed Killian away rather than take a chance. He never let it deter him though, always putting her first, never pushing her for more than she could give him. Killian had been incredibly patient, understanding her in a way no one else ever had. He had been willing to get a permanent mark that showed his love for her, even when he wasn’t sure she felt the same way or that he would ever see her again. Growing up she had always hoped for a love like this and now she had it, she had True Love, that kind of love that was so rare but so worth fighting for.
Emma never had been very good with words, so she showed him what this meant to her by softly pressing her lips to his, a tear escaping as she did. When she pulled back, she looked into his eyes, quietly saying “I love you.”
Killian smiled at her, the tension easing away as he realized she wasn’t running scared. Emma couldn’t really blame him, for so long it had been one step forward and two steps back with her; ever since Camelot and the Underworld, she had been more open but she knew Killian was still afraid of pushing her out of her comfort zone and moving too fast. Moving in together was the first step to building a life together and she hoped he knew that she wasn’t scared of the future, not as long as he was in it.
“I love you too, Swan. And I always will, no matter what.”
Emma smiled and leaned in to kiss him again. She didn’t know what the future held for her, but she knew Killian would be by her side until the very end, whenever that may be.