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Steve Is Hilarious High

Summary:

After an accident, Steve is high as a kite on pain meds and it leads to an abundance of honestly with Tony.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

“Steve. Steve, please wake up.” He hears a voice coming through the fog that is his mind right now.

He moves his head slightly with his eyes still closed and flinches in pain. His entire body aches and he can’t remember how he got here.

“Urg.” He manages as he wrenches his eyes open, blurry images filling his vision.

“Oh thank gosh, you really had us worried buddy. Try not to move too much, you’re pretty doped up right now.” The blurry figure in front of him says. He doesn’t need his vision to know that its Tony, he’d be able to identify him with his eyes closed, unable to hear, with both hands behind his back.

“What….” He starts off, struggling with every word as he tries to speak.

“You were in a building during a fight and it sort of collapsed. It’s okay, no civilians were injured, but you really gave us a scare for a minute there.” Tony says softly. Steve’s vision starts to clear and he can see the worry on the other man’s face. He looks exhausted and his hair clearly shows the signs of him running his hands through it obsessively.

“How long have you been here?” He asks, noticing the bags under the other man’s eyes. He still looks good, even disheveled as all hell.

“A while now, the rest of the team was here at first, but Fury needed them for debriefings. I’m sure they’ll stop by once they hear you’re awake. Do you need anything? How’re you feeling?” Tony rambles, fidgeting with Steve’s blanket.

“You’re cute when you worry Tony.” He mumbles out, not really thinking it through. Wow, these drugs are really good.

“Did you get a concussion? The nurses couldn’t test you, obviously, but they didn’t see any brain damage on the scans.” Tony says as he leans forward and takes a closer look at him.

He’s leaning close enough that Steve would barely have to lean forward to kiss him, his lips are so gorgeous and he always gets so distracted by them.

“Your pupils look a little enlarged, that could be a sign of a concussion. How many fingers?” Tony asks as he holds up his hand.

Not even thinking, he responds, “Three, as long as it’s good quality lube.”

Tony’s jaw falls open as he looks at him in shock, which just makes Steve giggle like a school girl.

“I…. How high are you right now? Or is that the concussion speaking?” Tony asks, still looking baffled.

“I don’t have a concussion Tony, but these drugs are really good. Don’t look so shocked, you’ve heard worse I’m sure.” He says with a wave of his hand.

“Steve….” Tony says, his brow furrowed in concentration.

“It sounds good when you say my name.” He says softly, snuggling deeper into his pillow.

“Steve, are you gay?” Tony asks, a serious expression on his face.

“Oh, did I not tell you? Oops. Yeah, I’m gay. Like hella gay. Like the more cocks the better kind of gay. I was watching this porno one time, and-“ He starts, before Tony all but leaps out of his chair.

“Nurse! Doctor! Help!” Tony yells into the hallway. Suddenly a nurse rushes into the room and begins to look at Steve’s stats.

“Well Mr. Rogers, aren’t you looking much better. Your stats look good, coloring is much better, everything looks fine.” She says with a soft smile, writing down notes on her clipboard.

“I think he may have a concussion. Or he is very, very high on pain meds.” He says seriously, looking intently at the nurse.

“Oh that’s possible, it’s hard to know sometimes how much to give these big boys, with stats like these we can start weaning him off this afternoon. We haven’t seen anything to indicate a concussion, has he been showing symptoms?” She asks as she looks at Tony.

“Well he was talking about… personal things. Very private things.” Tony whispers to her.

“Oh, that’s probably just the pain meds! Think of it like having one tequila shot too many. Let me know if he starts slurring his words or vomiting.” She says dismissively, as he fiddles with his IV drip. She pats Tony on the shoulder, who still looks like he’s in a state of shock, then quickly leaves the room.

“Feel better now?” Steve asks with a loopy smile.

“Not really the word I would have used. But I’m glad you’re out of the woods at least.” He says awkwardly.

“Don’t tell me you’re going to act all weird about me now that you know that I’m gay.” He says with another giggle.

“No, no, I’m bisexual so that’s definitely not it.” Tony stutters quietly.

“I knew it! Remember last month, when you said that was an interior decorator leaving your bedroom at 5 am? I knew he wasn’t really an interior decorator.” Steve says with a snort.

“Honestly, I’m surprised you believed that as long as you did. And he was an interior decorate actually, but that wasn’t why he was in my room all night.” Tony says softly. He’s still standing a ways away from him and he can’t help but feel like somethings still off.

“So how come you’re still acting all weird?” He blurts out. These meds were deleting any resemblance of a filter and it was weirdly thrilling.

“Because it’s really hard not thinking about all the things you talked about, and I can’t exactly bang your brains out while you’re hooked up to a heart monitor.” Tony finally blurts out, his face immediately falling once he realizes what he’s said.

“You want to bang my brains out?” He asks with a smile. Now he was the one getting all sorts of images.

“I mean yes, but not like this. And not just banging.” Tony says quickly.

“Not just banging? Do you also mean like sucking and biting and fingering-“ Steve begins to list.

“No! I mean yes, yes to all those things, but that’s not what I’m talking about.” Tony says, burrowing his face in his hands, “I mean also like, dating and cuddling and… you being my boyfriend.”

“You want me to be your boyfriend?” Steve asks, the smile on his face growing even wider. The flutter in his heart is 100% Tony’s words and not the drugs.

“I didn’t plan to ask you like this.” Tony says as he blushes slightly.

“I’d be worried if you did. But I’m just happy you planned to ask me at all.” He says, feeling himself blush slightly despite the drugs.

“You are?” Tony asks, sounds uncharacteristically shy. And gosh, did he look totally adorable like that.

“Tony Stark, will you be my boyfriend?” He asks, leaning over and grabbing Tony’s hand, which only makes him blush deeper.

“Of course.” Tony says squeezing his hand back.

“And will you also fuck me and suck me and bite-“

Notes:

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