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There was a secret that Tsuna didn't tell anyone. There was a secret that he kept to himself.
And he would never tell the others about it.
Never.
The mafia doesn't know about it. His friends didn't know about it. Even Reborn didn't know about it.
His mother had a secret too. Even his father, Sawada Iemitsu doesn't know about it.
They were youkai's. His mother was a pure bred youkai so that means he was a hanyo, a half-blooded yokai.
However, they sealed it. They sealed their blood as a youkai making them human.
They sealed it through the power of a priestess.
Nana sealed her youkai blood for his father, Sawada Iemitsu.
Sometimes, Tsuna felt bad about his mother sealing his youkai blood because he knew his mother loved being a youkai and that it was her only connection to her family when they died.
He knew that she gave up something precious when she sealed her blood as a youkai so that she can love Iemitsu. And, she feared that he might not like her if he knew she was a youkai.
Tsuna scoffed. His mother was sacrificing too much.
His father cannot even leave the mafia for the sake of his family so sometimes he wondered what his mother saw in the man.
For Tsuna though, it was different. He lived his life as a hanyo. However, he was very cautious on not letting other youkai know of him. That was why he kept the facade of Dame-Tsuna to stay low so they might not know him as a youkai.
When he turned fourteen though, he sealed his blood as a youkai. He can't afford to let Reborn and the others know of his identity as a youkai. So when they were absent for 2 months because the Ninth needed them and decided that he needed to be independent, he went to see his youkai friends and the Nura clan whom he had the pleasure of knowing. After they spent time together, he gave them his goodbyes.
Then, he went to a priestess and asked her to seal his youkai blood thereby turning him into a human. At that exact moment, he said his farewells to his youkai self and to the world of youkai.
He knew that he'll never be involved in the youkai world now that he's tied by humans and the Vongola.
He knew that he'll never be able to use his abilities as a youkai now that he's a mafia boss. So now, all he can do is say goodbye to the world of youkai and let a tear run down his cheek.
When Reborn and the others came back though, he acted as if nothing happened. He acted as if the disappearance of his blood as a youkai never happened.
However, Tsuna missed it.
He missed being a youkai.
He missed being able to practice his swords using his youkai self. Everytime he saw Yamamoto's sword, his eyes will always be drawn to it.
He missed fooling around with others like he has no problem in the world.
He missed pranking others and having fun with the other youkai's. He's gotta admit when he was pissed with Reborn, he had a sudden urge to prank him mercilessly.
Well, blame it on his youkai blood. It was just really irritated, that's all.
Tsuna knows that he will never experience the life of a youkai but it never hurts to dream. Maybe, someday, in his next life, he'll be a youkai.
Who knows? Well, it's a fifty-fifty chance but he hopes that it'll come true.
After all, that was what his youkai self promised inside their subconscious. He promised to come back to him so Tsuna can only hope.
He can only hope after that unreachable dream.
He misses being a youkai and can only hope. However, there is no rule that says you can't dream, right?
Tsuna can only gaze into the sky and yearn for that unreachable world.
He truly missed being a youkai.