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It’s perfectly argued, in line with all laws and regulations, and is annoying the shit out of Shikaku.
He can’t be sure why. Maybe it’s the way his wife smiles at him as Shikamaru assures her she’ll have grandchildren, they just haven’t decided the particulars.
Maybe it’s the inevitability of it, because if Shikaku is honest he saw this cart coming a long time before it even made it to the track.
Maybe it’s..
Maybe.
—
There’s some inevitable uproar but it’s quieter than Shikaku thought it would be, and mostly fizzles out within a month. It’s a good sign- the Nara Clan couldn’t hate Ino or Chouji if they tried. It would be like denying their own arms.
There’s some grumbling from the Elder Council but when your drafted marriage contract has the promise of clan heirs AND the blessings of the Hokage, there’s not much to be done.
—
Yoshino doesn’t bring it up, because she is a woman and therefore wiley and patient.
Inoichi does, because he’s a little panicked and a little drunk and they haven’t seen Chouza since the announcement.
“So, the three of them.”
Shikaku makes the noncommittal ‘thinking about something else’ noise but Inoichi ignores him, which is typical.
“Married.”
Shikaku pours himself another drink.
“I mean I always figured Ino would pick one or the other but both?” Inoichi’s snort is exasperated and loving. “She’s a greedy little clover.”
“Mm.” Shikaku says.
Inoichi sighs deep. “You’re not gonna talk to him, are you?”
Shikaku doesn’t flinch, necessarily, but he does made a slight movement that could indicate something like a recoil.
“Coward.” Inoichi says.
It’s good natured, but it bites.
—
Yoshino is wiley and patient and evil, which is Shikaku’s conclusion when he walks into the kitchen to find her drinking tea with Akimichi Reiko.
Reiko is beautiful, warm and soft and giving. Chouza adores her and has for years.
She looks straight at Shikaku and says, “You can’t avoid this forever.”
“Yes I can,” He says, contrary because it is the only defense he has against very troublesome women.
Yoshino huffs and says, “If you don’t do anything, you’re going to regret it.”
Shikaku looks out the window at the tall maple tree in the courtyard. “I can’t-”
“Don’t you bring me into this,” Reiko says sweetly. “you know it won’t hold water.”
Shikaku does know. The rumor mills are kinder to the Akimichi than they are to other, less community-focused clans, but the multitude of lovers held by both the Patriarch and Matriarch can’t be denied.
(Rumor has it a couple have been shared.)
(Rumor has it.)
“It’s pointless now.” Shikaku says. “Let our children be happy.”
“Happiness is never pointless, Shikaku.” Reiko says. Something about the way she says it has him looking at her more closely but Reiko is a consummate Akimichi, for all she married into the clan. Shikaku can get nothing from the shield of her eyes.
—
“What are you afraid of?” Yoshino asks Shikaku as he combs out her hair.
Shikaku thinks and she lets him take all the time he needs.
“It seems cheap, to try now.” He admits. The words sting. “I told him no, he accepted it.”
“Did he really?” Yoshino asks over her shoulder.
“I don’t know.” It frustrates Shikaku to admit that. He’s heard the same complaint from Shikamaru time and again- that Chouji is too passive, too accepting, too ready to go with the flow and letting nothing of himself shine through.
“What if he doesn’t feel the same way he did?” Shikaku asks.
Yoshino turns, takes the comb from her husband’s fingers. She laces their hands together.
“Have you ever known Chouza to give up on what he loves?” She asks.
Shikaku is forced to admit that no, he has not.
She smiles, bumps her nose against his. “I’ll leave it be,” she promises, “for now.”
—
They had been young and full of life and they’d won the war, the terrible war, and Chouza had asked Shikaku to stay the night.
Shikaku had refused.
Chouza had nodded, said that was fine, and confirmed their plans for the next morning.
It had changed nothing- not their legendary teamwork nor their close friendship. It was a moment come and gone in an instant like so many others and now they were fathers and their children were growing and their children had seen the cliff that Shikaku had avoided and jumped off it hand in hand in hand and when had Shikamaru become braver than Shikaku?
When had Chouji?
Ino was braver than all of them combined. Shikaku was inclined to therefore think she didn’t count.
—
Chouji doesn’t question why Shikaku wants to speak with him, he just agrees to meet in the quiet teahouse by the river and lets his students go early.
“Interesting group,” Shikaku says and Chouji smiles. “They are. I have a feeling Shino gave me his odds and ends but that’s alright. I’m pretty good with odds and ends.”
Shikaku thinks of Maito Gai. Chouza was always good with odds and ends, too.
Chouji lets Shikaku gather his thoughts. Tea and cakes are ordered and Shikaku asks questions about the intended spot for the house his son and his wife and his husband intend to build. He asks about the intricacies of the contract and the plans for the next chunin exam. He asks about everything but what is on his mind.
Maybe he’s hoping Chouji will give up and ask but he doesn’t. If anything proves Chouza made the right choice in heir- Chouji over his older brother Chouichi- it is this endless capacity for patience.
Shikaku gathers his pride and reminds himself that yes he has known this boy since he was in diapers but he is a boy no longer- he is a man, and will someday take his father’s place, and will be a proxy member of the Nara and the Yamanaka by this time next year.
“I don’t know what to do about your father,” Shikaku confesses. He adds nothing else, because does he need to?
He can tell from the way Chouji steeples his thick fingers that he doesn't and wonders for a moment if the whole damn clan knows.
Probably.
Chouji gives his honorary uncle due consideration before he says, “You’re coming at this wrong.”
At Shikaku’s raised eyebrow Chouji says, “You think it’s a shogi game, and you made the wrong move, and now you don’t know how your opponent is going to counter but you’re sure it’s gonna hurt because your wrong move definitely hurt.”
It’s as blunt as Chouji can be without outright saying that Shikaku had cut his father’s heart out and Shikaku appreciates it, he thinks.
“It’s not a shogi game, Shikaku. It’s a door. It was opened for you once, but you closed it. Now you don’t know if you should try the handle again.”
Shikaku nods.
Chouji takes a steadying breath.
“It wouldn’t be locked,” he admits, and pays the bill.
—
It’s not new, this whole idea of shared relationships, bodies, space. It’s as old as the village, maybe as old as ninja.
Yoshino likes to cuddle, to sleep by his side. She likes gentle kisses and holding hands but when it comes to shutting the bedroom door, Shikaku has with her permission and encouragement sought company elsewhere.
Shikaku will comb his beloved wife’s hair, help her put on her kimono for the few official events they have to attend. He will clean her weapons kit as she cleans his, and he will amuse her with tales of his latest intimacies.
There have been plenty of people who were not Yoshino that Shikaku has bedded.
He sits in their bedroom and examines these encounters and as he thinks he sees a pattern that has been invisible to him before, likely out of self-preservation.
A large, somewhat jolly and not obviously dangerous, male-persuasion pattern.
When Yoshino comes in Shikaku looks at her and says, “I love him.”
Yoshino kisses his forehead and replies, “I know.”
—
It’s pouring rain when Shikaku is let into the Akimichi compound and there’s no avoiding looking like a drowned cat, which just adds insult to injury as far as Shikaku is concerned. There must be discussion between the three of them- the talk of fathers giving their children away- and avoiding the issue will make everything harder.
“Shika?” Chouza receives him in his study, big and comfortable and a little shabby, like him and every other Akimichi Patriarch who'd worked behind the desk. “Didn't you teleport? No," he says without Shikaku's input, "You just started walking because using the chakra would be troublesome. Without an umbrella because those are also troublesome. Honestly.”
Shikaku smiles a little. Chouza stands, retrieves a blanket, wraps it around Shikaku’s thin shoulders.
Shikaku grasps it and doesn’t sit. He’s too keyed up.
“I thought you were avoiding me,” Chouza admits with a little smile that creases his eyes. “Inoichi showed up that night. Drunk.”
“Of course he was.” Shikaku mutters.
“I can’t blame him, I thought about it myself.”
“Why?” Shikaku asks, and Chouza shrugs. “It’s a big change from what we know. I'm proud of them, but I'm- a little scared, too." He makes a vague gesture. "It’s going to put them in a lot of situations I’d rather they didn’t have to deal with- any of them. Are you sure you won’t sit? I can have tea brought-”
“I wasn’t ready.”
The words slip out unbidden and Shikaku can’t stop them.
“I wasn’t ready when you asked me back then and I didn’t make that clear and I hurt you and now it’s too late and I’ve made the biggest mistake of my life. I’m going home.”
Shikaku tries to get the blanket off, fumbles, curses, tries again, years of training gone to waste in the face of his panic.
Warm hands easily three times as big as his curl around his fingers. Chouza carefully helps him free his digits from the dastardly knit.
They stand there for a moment, Shikaku still damp and trembling, Chouza a silent mountainhead.
Then he carefully brings one hand up to touch the side of Shikaku’s face.
“You’re freezing.” Chouza murmurs.
There is such care in those words, a deep tenderness that Shikaku knows he has always gotten but never felt he deserved.
Shikaku closes his eyes, leans forward. Chouza embraces him and he falls asleep there, standing up.
—
There are a lot of ups and downs.
There are discussions- with Reiko, with Yoshino, with both women at once. There’s a talk with Inoichi that Shikaku would rather die than admit happens because the whole time Inoichi is side-eyeing both of them as though waiting to be jumped.
They do jump him. Shikaku gets him in the headlock, Chouza ruins his hair and Ino screeches in a pattern as old as they all are.
Shikaku sits down with Shikamaru because he can’t not, not when his troublesome brat was the impetus for this whole mess.
Shikamaru gives him a long look and says, “It will be okay.”
Shikaku grumbles at him and Yoshino chases both into the kitchen for dinner.
—
Shikaku ignores all of Kakashi’s inappropriate comments regarding how he is walking and it’s going well until Chouza has to come in- Official Clan Head Business- and Kakashi says, “Good job, Akimichi.”
Chouza replies, “Thank you, sir,” with a straight face and walks out.
Shikaku takes a deep breath, announces he is taking a break, and can hear his Hokage laughing all the way down the stairs.
—
Shikaku finds out later that Yoshino has tea with Kakashi twice a week- something to do with the new hospital regulations and a committee she’s forming.
Evil woman.
Beautiful, wonderful, evil woman.