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The SI-5 was a unit comprised of three very talented, dedicated people. Considering one of those people happened the mess formerly known as Daniel Jacobi, Kepler occasionally felt the need to check in.
“Do you feel prepared for tomorrow?” he asked. “I know I'm ready to see you in a suit.”
Jacobi snorted. “Don’t get too excited, I bought it second hand. I’ll be honest, this mission is not my cup of tea. Explosives and undercover I can do. Dancing… eh, not so much. Guess I’ll just hang out where the food is until you need me to break something.”
“I'm sure you'll look-” Kepler started, then stopped, processing the last bit of what Jacobi said. “You can't dance?”
“Nah, never learned. What, you can?” Jacobi looked over at him.
“Of course I can. Of course you can't.” Kepler sighed, getting out of bed.
“Where are you going?” Jacobi asked, frowning over the top of his computer.
“I’m going to teach you to dance,” Kepler said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Can't have you blowing our cover.”
Jacobi froze. “What? Teaching me to- no way, sir, really, I’ll be fine.”
Kepler crossed over to Jacobi’s side of the bed. With his pointer and middle fingers, he pushed the lid of Jacobi’s laptop closed. “I wasn't asking.”
Nervous, Jacobi stared up at him. “Really, you don’t have to do this.”
“Mr. Jacobi, have I ever led you astray?” Kepler questioned sweetly.
“No sir, of course not, I just don’t see why this is necessary.”
“Because...we are going to an event where to obtain the information we need, it will require a change in our identities. Those identities would be people who are familiar with ballroom dancing.”
“Yeah, so? If I never dance, no one can see that I’m bad at dancing! I’ve got this all figured out.” Jacobi reassured him.
“Jacobi. Dancing is a part of the plan tomorrow. Your performance needs to be…” He paused, pretending to search for the right word, regardless of the fact that they were both aware he had it already. “Attractive.”
“Please, sir, I don’t need lessons in being attractive.” Jacobi grinned.
Kepler couldn't help but smirk. “I know that better than anyone, Jacobi. But for the sake of the mission…May I have this dance?”
Kepler’s hand was extended now and as Jacobi pushed his computer onto the bed next to him and took the hand, he felt strangely like he was being lured into a pit of vipers. “I apologize in advance.”
“Don’t give me a reason to accept that apology.” Kepler dragged Jacobi from the bed and onto the carpeted area between it and the desk. “Do you at least know how to box step?”
“Box what now?” Jacobi asked.
Kepler took a deep breath. “It's going to be a long night.” He shot a wistful gaze at his flask.
“Then let’s get this over with.”
They began. The steps were simple enough, but Jacobi had trouble coordinating his feet to move the way he wanted, resulting in him stepping on Kepler’s toes multiple times. When he finally tried looking away from his feet, Jacobi found himself looking at Kepler, which was distracting to say the least.
“I always said I’d be willing to sell my soul for Goddard, but I didn't think my toes would be a necessary sacrifice,” Kepler lamented.
“Yeah, yeah,” Jacobi muttered. “Can we stop now? I think I got the gist of it.”
Kepler resisted the urge to laugh. “With all due respect, Mr. Jacobi, if you dance like that at this event, we won't be kicked out for stealing, we’ll be removed for lack of class. Let’s start again.”
Jacobi rolled his eyes, but readied himself to keep going.
Kepler started to count and dance again, showing what he considered to be an incredible amount of patience. “One, two, three, one, two, three, Ja-co-bi, my, damn, foot! One, two, three…”
“Oh, your precious foot.” Jacobi rolled his eyes. “I think I’m getting pretty good at this- sorry.” He had stepped on Kepler’s toes once again.
“I, hate, you,” Kepler spat under his breath. But after that, he carried on with a regular, nonviolent count and Jacobi eventually, by some heavenly mercy, seemed to be getting the hang of it. Gradually, Kepler felt safe enough to inch closer to Jacobi than he should've been. His voice fell to a low murmur but continued, a constant.
Jacobi noticed the change and it took all of his concentration to keep moving his feet in the right steps. He wasn’t sure he could keep it up for much longer and decided to try something bold. Jacobi raised his hand in the air, dragging Kepler’s with it, and spun in a circle. He might’ve pulled it off, if he hadn’t backed into the bed upon regaining his balance and fallen backwards onto the mattress.
Kepler fell on top of him. He stared down at Jacobi, surprised, but fully enjoying the view. He definitely didn't mind having Jacobi under him.
Jacobi was paralyzed. It was… an odd position, to say the least, but Jacobi wasn’t sure he had the the strength to push Kepler away. Jacobi’s cheeks felt hot, and he was certain he was blushing like crazy. Could Kepler see that? Had he noticed? Why wasn’t he moving? Oh god, why wasn’t he moving? Was he doing this intentionally?
“...Sir…?”
Jacobi’s cheeks were burning and Kepler was determined to savor that image for as long as possible. So, agonizingly slowly, he asked, “Yes, Mr. Jacobi…?”
Jacobi didn’t know how to respond to this. He’d expected Kepler to move- but then, when was Major Kepler predictable? “I… ah… should we… um…” he stammered incoherently.
“Should we...um…?” Kepler repeated, putting on a thoughtful expression.
Clearly, Kepler was messing with him. Jacobi bit his lip. “Get back to… dancing lessons? Maybe?”
Kepler shot him a brief grin. “Sure.” With that, he was off of Jacobi, off the bed, and back to barely touching Jacobi. “Please, for the sake of my safety, do not attempt another spin.”
Jacobi was trembling as he stood up. Had that really just happened? Why the hell was Kepler behaving so casually about all of this, as if that wasn’t the closest they’d ever been to each other? The smarmy bastard was such an actor.
“Right,” Jacobi agreed, trying not to let the internal conflict shine through in his voice.
“That is not my preferred way of getting into bed with you.”
Jacobi blushed, once again finding himself speechless.
“Obviously, I prefer sleep,” Kepler stated coolly.
“Right.” Jacobi repeated, his voice faint.
Kepler sighed lazily, letting the confident smile stay on his face. “It's only a waltz, Jacobi.”
“Should we… get back to dancing then?” Jacobi asked, desperate to depart from this topic of conversation.
“Of course,” Kepler agreed and then they returned to the ever present counting and the spectacular inadequacies of Jacobi’s feet.
They stayed at it for awhile, until Jacobi could do the Viennese Waltz while causing only minor injury to himself and others. Kepler called it a few minutes after midnight, deeming Jacobi, “An attractive dancer, but not definitely not because of your footwork.”
As Jacobi got back in bed, the memories of their dance haunted him, especially those of Kepler on top of him, just staring down into his eyes. He’d definitely meant to do that, to make Jacobi wonder, but the real question was whether he had feelings or he had just noticed a weakness and decided to take advantage of it.
Jacobi glanced sideways at Kepler. Some crazy instinct told him to lean over and kiss him. He knew it was a stupid idea, that Kepler would only laugh and push him away, but for once, he wanted to be in charge.
Before he could stop himself, Jacobi shifted closer to Kepler, rested his hand on Kepler’s cheek, and kissed him.
Kepler’s eyes snapped open in something resembling shock, but he quickly found himself closing them again, drawing the other man closer. Finally, Jacobi had taken the hint. Kepler had worried he would be counting to three for the rest of time. Coincidentally, he felt like he would be absolutely fine kissing Jacobi for the rest of time, but he did eventually break away. “You're a wonderful kisser,” he murmured his praise, a rare and genuine gift.
Jacobi closed his eyes and rested his forehead against Kepler’s, smiling to himself.
Kepler was loving this, but, true to himself, he couldn't refuse the opportunity to get the last word. “But...with all due respect...you’re still an awful dancer, Mr. Jacobi.”
Jacobi grinned in spite of the insult. “With all due respect, sir, shut up.”
Jacobi leaned forward to kiss him again.