Work Text:
When you’re in high school, all days kind of look the same. You wake up at the same time every day, go to class every day, have lunch with the same people every day, try to not fail tests every day, and then you go home to do your homework every day. It’s the same thing over and over again – kind of like Groundhog Day, but without ending up with your crush to break the endless cycle. Nothing unexpected ever happens when you’re in high school, not even when your best friend is Spiderman.
Peter talks about a lot of cool stuff. Stopping bank robberies, chasing thieves, ducking bullets left and right, jumping in front of a truck to stop it from crashing into a building… Peter does it all. His life is exciting and dangerous and unexpected every day.
Ned wouldn’t say he envies him, per se. After all, he probably wouldn’t last one afternoon in Peter’s shoes. He gets tired from holding his hand up too long in class, no way he’s about to go chasing the bad guys through Queens. But at least something happens in Peter’s life. The most exciting thing that happened to him this week was getting an extra chicken nugget from the lunch lady yesterday.
His mom always told Ned to look for the positive in bad situations, so he guesses that Flash occasionally taking a break from his Peter Parker Hate Club to focus his bullying on him is, at the least, not boring. He doesn’t necessarily enjoy Flash making him feel like shit every once in a while instead of generally just ignoring him, but he appreciates the change in routine it brings with it.
Peter, however, gets absolutely furious when Flash directs his nastiness to Ned. Like, the guy can handle Penis Parker jokes any day of the week, doesn’t care about being laughed at or pushed against lockers or being the butt of every joke that comes out of Flash’s mouth, but as soon as Flash dares to even look at Ned the wrong way, Peter seems to grow ten sizes and threatens Flash as if he stepped right out of some sick mafia movie. So Flash usually stays away from him when Peter is around. Ned secretly thinks Flash is scared of Peter, of what he’s capable of when you really piss him off. Maybe Flash has better people skills than he lets on and he knows that jokes at Peter’s expense would never piss him off as much as jokes at Ned’s expense. Maybe that’s why he usually gets spared by Flash and his snarky comments.
Usually also means “just not when Peter is around”. So, when Peter disappears during class to go save the city, Flash slithers towards Ned like an ugly serpent and spits his venom at him instead of his usual victim.
“Hey fatso,” he says, slick grin on his face as he turns around in his desk. Ned looks up from his notebook to glance at the teacher, but Mr. White is bent over a Sudoku and definitely not paying attention to his murmuring students. Ah yes, gotta love public school.
“Get lost, Flash,” Ned sighs.
“Damn, no need to be snarky. Rolled out of the wrong side of the bed this morning?”
“No, just not in the mood for this.”
Flash puts on his best innocent expression. “Wh – this? I just wanted to ask you a question!”
Ned groans. Flash never just wants to do anything. There’s always more to it.
“Fine,” he eventually says, hoping he can come up with a quick reply that’ll satisfy Flash enough to leave him alone.
Flash smiles. “Okay, so I know big, hairy gay men are called bears and skinny young ones are called twinks. What are fat, young gay guys called? You know, guys such as yourself? Or do people just call them faggots?”
The air gets knocked out of Ned’s lungs. He’s been kind of out for a while, never explicitly saying he’s gay but also never denying it, but nobody has ever called him that right to his face. His intent to come up with a quick reply flies out of the window and leaves Ned speechless, staring at Flash’s ugly grin in shock.
“They’re called ‘turn the fuck around and don’t open your ugly mouth again if you want to keep your tongue’,” Michelle interjects. She snaps a pair of scissors at Flash, and something in her expression makes Ned believe she isn’t kidding. Flash must see it too, because his grin immediately falters and he turns back around.
“Thanks,” Ned mutters, cheeks hot with shame. Michelle smiles at him – a genuine, nice smile. He’s only ever seen The Sarcastic Smile, so this is quite a sight for sore eyes.
“No problem, Ned. We gotta stick together, don’t we?”
“We?”
She lifts her notebook and taps a small sticker she put on it, showcasing the bi pride colors. Then she smiles again before focusing her attention back on her sketchbook.
Ned tries to do his Calculus assignment during the remaining twenty minutes of class, but, although Flash doesn’t bother him anymore, he can’t bring himself to focus.
***
Ned usually tells Peter everything, but he doesn’t tell him what Flash called him in Calculus when Peter walks into his room that night. He has a fresh cut on his cheekbone and a split lip, but he’s grinning like crazy.
“Alright, I got snacks. You got the movie?” He asks, throwing a bag of chips at Ned. Ned nods at his laptop.
“All set,” he smiles. Peter squints at him.
“What’s up?” He asks, suspicious. Damn, Peter always knows when something is up with him.
“The sky,” Ned replies automatically, staring at his laptop screen. He can see Peter looking at him in its reflection, but he refuses to meet his eyes.
“Did something happen while I was gone?” Peter asks softly.
“No, no. Everything was fine. I had to cover for you a couple of times, though. Told the teachers you went home with explosive diarrhea.”
Peter nudges him with his elbow. “You’re a terrible best friend,” he smiles.
Ned nudges him back. “You’re stuck with me whether you like it or not.”
Peter settles in bed next to Ned, brushing his hand against his.
“I like it,” he says, all traces of teasing gone. Ned’s ears turn hot.
“Uh,” he stutters, trying to hide his blush, “we should probably, uh, start the movie. You know my mom doesn’t want any more visitors after eleven.”
“Right,” Peter nods. “Let’s war some stars.”
***
Ned fully expects another boring day at school the next morning, but then a small note falls out of his locker when he opens it.
He bends down and grabs it, quickly unfolding it. He’s anticipating another slur written in Flash’s ugly handwriting and is pleasantly surprised when that isn’t the case.
Hey, Ned! The note reads. You looked really cute yesterday. Hope you have a great day!
Ned can’t help but smile. He puts the note in the pocket of his jeans and pulls his books out of his locker. When he closes it, Peter is leaning against the one next to his.
“You look happy today,” he remarks, a small smile playing on his lips.
“Of course I do. We have Gym today; my favorite subject.”
“You hate Gym.”
“I never said that!” Ned gasps, feigned shock written on his face. Peter laughs and nudges him with his shoulder.
“You literally said, and I quote: ‘I’d rather be abducted by aliens and be forced to eat rats for the rest of my life than have one more Gym class’ last week.”
“Exaggeration,” Ned waves him off. “It’s a thing teenagers do, Peter. You should look into it.”
“You’re such a dick,” Peter laughs, throwing his arm around Ned’s shoulders as they walk to their first period. Something stirs in Ned’s chest, but he purposely pushes it back down and orders it to stay there.
***
When Ned takes his gym clothes out of his bag during fourth period, another note falls from between his stuff onto the ground. He quickly snatches it up before anyone sees it and turns around to the wall to read it.
You have such a nice laugh.
Ned’s cheeks turn red. He reads the note over and over again, biting his lip in order not to giggle. Nobody had ever told him his laugh was nice . Well, except for his mom, who didn’t count because she was… you know, his mom .
“What’s that you have there?” A voice suddenly comes from behind him. Ned freezes, hoping Flash isn’t talking to him, but then the note gets yanked out of his hands and he gets shoved against the wall.
“Hey!” Ned yells, turning around. “That’s mine!”
“Oh, I’m sorry,” Flash sneers, “I didn’t mean to steal your love letter. ‘You have such a nice laugh’, aw, your mom’s so sweet. You think she’ll write me a note like that too?”
“It’s not from my mom,” Ned says. He doesn’t even know why he says that, since it’d be way easier if Flash just believed his mom still left him notes, but he just… wants to prove him wrong. Prove that people do think Ned’s cute and has nice features and is worthy of their attention.
“It isn’t? So Neddy boy is getting actual love letters? From who, the lunch lady?”
“From whom ,” Peter corrects, seeming to appear out of thin air behind Flash. He’s already in his gym shorts but isn’t wearing a shirt, as if he noticed Ned being targeted in the middle of changing and didn’t have time to put on a shirt before interfering.
“I’m sorry?” Flash asks, shifting his attention to Peter.
Peter cocks a bow. “You’re forgiven,” he says, grabbing the note before Flash can do anything about it. “And leave Ned alone, dick.”
Flash holds up his hands and steps away.
“Okay, whatever, Penis Parker,” he says. “I’ll leave you two homos to it. You don’t have to be so obvious about you sucking Neddy’s dick, we all know it anyway.”
Peter doesn’t correct him. About anything. He doesn’t say he isn’t gay or that he isn’t dating Ned. He just stares at Flash until he chuckles nervously and walks away, leaving Ned and Peter alone.
“Thanks,” Ned sighs. He hates how Peter always has to step in when Flash is being an asshole again, as if Ned can’t take care of it himself, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t grateful for Peter telling Flash off.
Peter puts a reassuring hand on Ned’s shoulder. “No problem,” he says. He gives him back the note without even looking at it. “Come on, let’s get ready. We’re playing dodgeball today and I already know who I want to hit in the stomach ‘on accident’.”
***
The next time Ned receives a note, he writes back.
You’re probably the smartest person in this school. The note is hidden behind the fish tank in the science lab. Ned is on feeding duty this month, so he’s the only one ever around the tank.
Though the note makes Ned smile, he can’t help but look over his shoulder to see if Flash is around. He grabs a pen from his desk, makes sure nobody is paying attention to him and writes back: Your notes are really sweet, but I don’t like the exposure they bring with them. How about you just text me? He includes his phone number and then puts the note back where he found it, hoping that his secret admirer will find it there.
Ned is an anxiety-ridden mess for the rest of the day. He can’t stop thinking about someone else finding the note and figuring it’s Ned’s number scrabbled on it and then prank-texting him pretending to be his secret admirer but actually just being a random prick. Or worse; Flash. He would be targeted for the rest of his high school career if Flash managed to catfish him.
He completely and utterly regrets his decision to just leave his number for anyone to find it by the time he’s having dinner with his mom. He can barely get a bite through his throat and plays with his pasta until his mom asks what’s wrong.
“Just… not that hungry,” Ned says.
“Is everything okay, dear?” His mom asks. God, she’s always so worried about him. Why is she always so worried about him? It’s not like he’s ever given her the idea that she should be worried about him; he never comes home with bruises, nobody ever steals his stuff, his grades are always great and he’s never late.
“I’m fine, Mom. I just had a big lunch.”
His mom looks at him, dark eyes searching for the lie, but then she sits back and smiles.
“Okay, sweetie. You can be excused if you want. I’ll put your dinner in the fridge in case you get hungry later.”
Ned smiles back at her.
“Thanks, Mom,” he says before getting up. He gives her a kiss on the forehead and makes his way to his bedroom.
He tries to do some homework, but his mind keeps turning his earlier decision into the worst scenarios. He’s on the verge of fabricating a plan to break into the school to see if the note is still there when he gets a text.
From: Unknown (7:18)
Hey! Good call about the texting. We’re in the 21st century, after all.
Ned is almost embarrassed by how fast he texts back. Almost.
To: Unknown (7:20)
Yeah, plus this is also better for the environment.
From: Unknown (7:21)
Unless you count the electricity it takes to charge your phone plus the amount you waste by having it plugged in when you’re at 100%
To: Unknown (7:23)
I’ll have you know that I installed an alarm to let me know when my battery is fully charged so I can pull the plug to save electricity
From: Unknown (7:24)
I knew there was a reason I liked you :D
Ned grins widely. He’s irrationally flattered about a random stranger liking him.
To: Unknown (7:25)
Yeah, about that. Idk why you like me, but I appreciate it, but also can I know who you are so I can maybe perhaps like you back?
The reply doesn’t come immediately, which is fine. Maybe his secret admirer got called to dinner or had to do some homework first. But then they don’t reply for an hour, and then two and three and then suddenly it’s midnight and Ned is dozing off when his phone pings again.
From: secret admirer (12:03)
Would it be horrible for me to ask if I can remain anonymous for just a little bit longer? I’m really shy
To: secret admirer (12:06)
Can I at least know if you’re a boy or a girl?
To: secret admirer (12:07)
Or neither! You can be neither or both or whatever I’m sorry
From: secret admirer (12:08)
Hahaha you’re adorable
This is when Ned knows it definitely isn’t Flash or one of his minions. Though they’re all pretty intelligent, all of them believe in the gender binary and none of them believe in more than two genders. If this was one of Flash’s minions, they would have for sure reacted differently.
From: secret admirer (12:09)
Uh I’m a boy, hope that’s, you know, okay?
Ned’s heart starts beating incredibly fast. He may be kind of out (meaning that he just never denies being gay) but being lowkey out and explicitly saying you’re gay are two completely different things.
His hands shake as he types his next message. He thinks long and hard about whether or not to send it, just in case the person on the other end of the line wants to hurt or embarrass him in any way, but then he realizes he’s ready . Even if this isn’t actually a secret admirer and screenshots of their conversation grace the walls at school tomorrow, Ned is ready to actually confirm he likes boys.
So, eventually, he just sends three simple words:
To: secret admirer (12:30)
Yeah, that’s okay
From: secret admirer (12:31)
:)!
From: secret admirer (12:31)
Well, I should go to sleep now. Talk to you tomorrow?
To: secret admirer (12:32)
Sure! Goodnight!
From: secret admirer (12:32)
Goodnight :) x
Somehow, that little kiss at the end makes Ned’s heart jumps. Rationally , he knows it’s ridiculous to enjoy texting a random stranger who may or may not like him. But Ned never was the most rational guy, so who cares if this puts a smile on his face?
***
Peter is late for first period the next morning. He basically falls into class, hair a mess and his shirt put on backwards. He sends Ms. Jason an apologetic smile and throws himself onto the chair next to Ned. Ned gets a whiff of Peter’s body spray, which wakes up the same thing in his chest he constantly orders to stay down but never does.
“Sorry I’m late,” Peter whispers, taking out his books. “Got caught up in a robbery last night and only got home at three.”
“You’re gonna get a burnout by this rate, Peter,” Ned says.
Peter grins. “Aw, Ned, you care about me!”
Ned stomps him. “No, I don’t.”
Peter gets all up in his personal space, which Ned should mind but doesn’t, and scans Ned’s face before saying, “oh, yes you do, big boy. You’re so cute.”
“I will slap you.”
Peter chuckles.
“Kinky,” he says.
Peter Parker is a flirter. Ned has always known this, but for some reason he never really noticed . That is, until now.
His flirting doesn’t limit itself to one gender; if Peter finds someone attractive, he will flirt with them. It’s both very charming and very intimidating. He had witnessed it tons of times at comic book conventions or at school or at the occasional party.
He had just never been at the receiving end of that flirting.
Ned doesn’t know how to reply, so he just nudges Peter and points at his books to make him pay attention. Peter blows him a kiss and opens his syllabus.
He’s ridiculous. This is ridiculous. The flirting doesn’t mean anything, right? He does it with everyone. Peter finds it funny to flirt with people – it just makes him happy.
Right?
***
By the time Ned has been texting his secret admirer for a month, he feels like he’s leading a double life.
Not the cool double life - not like Peter’s. More like the type of double life that makes you feel like a terrible, horrible, two-faced liar. Yeah, that kind.
Because, you see, his secret admirer (who told Ned to call him Michael as an alias) doesn’t know Ned is crushing on Peter way too hard to be interested in any kind of romantic relationship with anyone else. He knows the decent thing to do would be to just let Michael know he’s not emotionally available at the moment, but it’s just so… so nice to have someone interested in him. To have someone compliment him, tell him how cute he is or how much they want to hold Ned’s hand. And the fact that Ned is actually enjoying keeping his admirer in the dark like that automatically makes him a horrible person.
On top of all that, Peter also doesn’t know about Michael’s existence. The two of them normally share everything (seriously, when they were thirteen Peter told him about how weirdly attracted he was to Hiccup in How to train your dragon 2 ) and yet Ned can’t bring himself to tell him about Michael. He’s afraid that if he’ll tell him, Peter would encourage him to pursue a relationship with him and that would mean that Peter would officially - though not explicitly - reject him as a possible significant other. Ned just couldn’t handle that.
So he keeps it a secret. He never tries texting Michael at school when Peter is around (lucky for him, Michael also doesn’t text in school), turns off his phone when he hangs out with Peter and just simply never mentions any of his friends to Michael when they talk.
On the bright side, at least something is finally happening in his life. On the not so bright side, that something is him crushing on his best friend while having a secret admirer who is, sadly, not said best friend.
Or so he thinks.
It all comes to an epic conclusion when he and Peter are at a party. They honestly only ever go to a party every blue moon, but Michelle invited them to an underground rave which sounded pretty cool, especially because nobody from their high school would be there, so they had agreed to go. Ned had been texting Michael the entire night, talking about the most random shit as he got ready, and even now he still gets a periodic text he quickly responds to when Peter isn’t looking.
Ned notices Peter is texting too, which is cool, Peter is allowed to text other people. It’s just that he isn’t texting with his normal phone. Ned doesn’t know why he would be texting with a burner phone, but maybe that’s just a superhero thing. Like, maybe it’s dangerous for Peter to contact Tony Stark on his normal phone or something. Yeah, that makes sense.
Ned kind of forgets about it for the rest of the night. He, Peter and Michelle actually end up having fun , which is pretty rare at parties. They dance together and have some spiked soda and laugh at weird dancers. Peter even formally asks Ned to dance once, to a slow dance, even. Ned can’t do nothing to hide his blush and just decides to go with it, even going as far as to press their bodies together and rest his head on Peter’s shoulder.
When the song ends, Ned isn’t the only one who’s blushing.
They call it a night when the first person starts puking alcohol everywhere. It’s all fun and games until someone gets alcohol poisoning. Michelle waves them both goodbye and walks home, seeing as she only lives around the block, and Ned and Peter wait for a cab together.
“So, you staying over at my place tonight?” Peter asks. He’s typing a message on his burner phone, but briefly looks up to smile warmly at Ned.
“Sure,” Ned says. “Easier to share a cab anyway.”
“Aw, you’re so romantic.”
“I’m not trying to be romantic!”
Peter shrugs and puts his phone away.
“No,” he says. “If you were trying to be romantic you would at least hold my hand.”
“Shut up.”
“Damn, you could just tell me you don’t want to hold my hand instead of being rude.”
Ned knows Peter is teasing, but he still somewhat looks… hurt? Wait, is he… forreal?
“Wait, do you actually want me to hold your hand?” He asks. He can’t believe he even managed to get those words over his lips. Part of him hopes Peter will say no so that they can just go back to teasing, but a bigger part of him is desperate for Peter to say yes.
Peter shrugs again. That kid really needs to learn different ways to show his emotions
“I mean, yeah. Have been for the past couple of months.”
“Wait, what? ”
A deep blush rises from Peter’s neck to the tips of his ears. He looks at the ground and kicks at some invisible dirt as he mutters, “I’ve been trying to flirt with you for months, Ned.”
Ned can’t believe what he’s hearing.
“B- but you flirt with everyone.”
“I know. That’s why I, uh…” Peter looks anywhere except Ned’s face, cheeks so red they can surely be seen from space. “That’s why I started leaving you notes?” It ends like a question, like he himself isn’t sure of it.
Ned struggles to find his voice. “You were the one sending me those notes?”
“And the one you’ve been texting for a month,” Peter confesses. He finally meets Ned’s gaze, eyes big and scared.
“Michael?” Ned asks.
“One of the kids from Peter Pan,” Peter explains. “I thought it was clever, but I should’ve just come clean about it immediately instead of like… catfishing you. You’re probably all hung up on Michael now and it probably totally freaks you out that I am Michael and now you’re gonna hate me because I played with your emotions and - ” Peter is spiraling so fast Ned can barely make out any individual words anymore, so before he can talk himself into changing his name and moving to Europe, Ned grabs him by the collar of his shirt and kisses him.
Peter makes a surprised sound at the back of his throat but immediately leans into the kiss, bringing up his hands to cup Ned’s cheeks. Peter’s lips are soft and warm and he vaguely tastes like Redbull, and Ned is eager to deepen the kiss. Peter is completely compliant, making appreciative noises that make Ned’s ears turn hot with both embarrassment and arousal.
Ned wishes they could stay like that forever, but eventually they have to part to catch their breath.
“Wh - I, uh, not that I didn’t appreciate that kiss, but I’m confused,” Peter stutters. His lips are as red as his cheeks now.
“Mhh?” Ned hums. He feels weirdly confident after just having kissed his best friend straight on the mouth.
“Did you kiss me to shut me up or are you genuinely into me?”
Ned can’t believe Peter still has to ask that.
“I’m genuinely into you, idiot,” Ned says.
“Okay, next question: have you been into me for a while or did you just start getting into me after you realized Michael and I were the same person?”
“What is this, an interrogation?”
Peter smiles sheepishly.
“No, I’m just trying to get the full picture.”
Ned sighs.
“I’ve been into you for pretty much our entire friendship, Peter. But I only started really crushing on you a couple of months ago.”
“Really?”
Ned nudges him playfully. “Really.”
“Okay, final question.”
“God, you’re such an examining nerd sometimes.”
“Aw, you’re already giving me nicknames. And, just so you know, I just wanted to ask if I can kiss you again?”
“Well, technically , I kissed you ,” Ned points out with a grin, but before Peter can retaliate, he presses their lips together again.
Ned gets the feeling he’s gonna get really good at kissing Peter in the near future.