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"The Jewish students association of Greendale is having a Purim party!" Annie slides into her seat at the table, beaming.
"A what kind of party?" Jeff asks. "I've never heard of--"
"Will there be free food?" Professor Duncan interrupts. "I do enjoy free food."
"If they charged for the food, it wouldn't be a party, it'd be a restaurant," Professor Hickey grumbles.
"Purim," Abed says to Jeff. "It's a Jewish holiday."
All eyes swing to him.
"You read the story of Esther, drown out the name of the bad guy, dress up in costumes." Abed looks around the table. "What?"
"I admire your knowledge about Judaism, Abed," Shirley says primly.
"Me too," Annie adds. "I just knew about the costumes and the cookies. And apparently drinking." She brandishes the pink flyer she took down from the bulletin board in the cafeteria. "This says there will be eight different flavors of schnapps." She grimaces.
"Now I'm definitely going," Chang says. "...When is it, again?"
"The fourteenth of Adar," Abed says. "Well, usually. This year it's the fourteenth of the second Adar, which is either called Adar two, or Adar bet. Unlike the Muslim calendar, the Jewish calendar is metonic, so there's an extra month in seven out of every nineteen years."
There's a momentary silence.
"March fifteenth," Annie offers. "On the regular calendar. According to the flyer."
"I didn't know Greendale even had a Jewish students association," Jeff says.
"Apparently we do," Annie says brightly. "And I think we should all go to the party, and show our support."
"I don't do costumes," Professor Hickey informs the room.
"I have some very nice Biblical costumes in my basement," Shirley offers. "From my church's Nativity play."
"The Nativity isn't in the Jewish Bible," Britta points out.
"It's part of the unauthorized sequel," Abed agrees.
"Unauthorized?!" Shirley's voice takes on a dangerous tone.
"From the Jewish point of view, the Qur'an is an unauthorized sequel too," Abed points out.
"The costumes don't have to be Biblical," Annie says hastily. "You can wear anything. Abed, you could go as Inspector Spacetime!"
"I don't think so," Abed says. "It wouldn't be the same without my Constable."
"Awww," Annie says, contrite. "I'm sorry, Abed, I didn't mean to make you sad."
"It's okay," he assures her. "I'm not sad. I can visit with him in the Dreamatorium whenever I need to."
"You mean the room where you painted yellow lines on the walls?" Jeff asks. "I hate to break it to you, buddy, but--"
"Also we text all the time," Abed says, holding up his phone. "I just told him about this whole conversation."
"That's nice," Shirley says approvingly.
"And he gave me the perfect costume idea," Abed adds. His thumbs are flying on the touchscreen.
"So it's settled!" Annie says brightly.
"Troy says hi to everyone," Abed continues. "He and Levar were captured by pirates, but it turned out that the pirates were all Star Trek fans, so once they saw who was on the yacht, they asked for autographs and then let them go. One of them even asked for Troy's autograph."
"You have a strange imagination, Abed," Jeff says, shaking his head.
"No, it's true," Professor Duncan insists. "I saw it on the news."
"You watch the news?" Jeff raises an eyebrow.
"Okay, maybe I read it on the cover of a tabloid," the professor admits. "But it was a reputable tabloid!"
"That's it, I've had enough," Professor Hickey declares, and pushes back from the table.
"But we have more to discuss," Annie wheedles.
"I've got a class."
"I'm in your class," Annie points out. "It doesn't meet until after lunch."
"Then I'm going to lunch."
"Me too," Jeff says, standing up.
"You guys, it's not even eleven!" Annie argues.
"All right, you got us, we're going back to our office where I'm going to surf the net for soft porn and he's going to do -- whatever he does," Jeff admits. Seeing Annie's expression, he relents. "But we'll definitely come to the party."
"Start thinking about your costumes," Annie calls as they walk out the door.
NB: in "Analysis of Cork Based Networking," in the television coverage of the bear attack, the news crawler displays news that Levar Burton and his non-celebrity companion were, in fact, captured by pirates in the Gulf of Mexico. Here's a screencap.
