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Bruising Waters

Summary:

Never tell a Soul. Never Let Yourself Be Seen.
His mother's words had been pounded into Lance's head from birth; a warning to prepare him and keep his family safe. He's managed to hide from the Garrison and even in space. But, much to Lance's chagrin, the universe has other plans.
When Lance contracts an alien virus while out on a diplomatic mission that starts attacking his Mer form, Lance figures it's just a "space cold". He brushes off the others' worry and tries to continue as normal. But the pain is getting worse with each passing day, and he hasn't had a moment's peace alone to change forms and see what could be causing it.
When everything finally hits the fan, the team quickly finds that Lance is in much worse condition than they had assumed. Lance is not only dying, but he's changing right in front of their eyes.

So much Hurt and Whump in the first chapter. So much good Bonding and Comfort in the next two. Let's do this y'all! (Sorry, Lance)

Notes:

I apparently cannot do anything in moderation, and my word count will never cease to get away from me.

skdjfhkjhf This is literally the longest fic I've ever written. Happy Birthday Sailormew4! I gift you merLance, hurt/comfort, keith and lance bonding, (well lance and everyone bonding), whump, angst/fluff and sickfic XD

(Who else HATES writing summaries, raise your hands)

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Honey, We Hurt the Fish

Chapter Text

Lance murmured softly to himself as he slept, turning over in the warmth that the thick, gentle kelp leaves provided as the water gently glided around him. He felt a current run its fingers through his hair, playfully jostling the strands and Lance whined, batting at it and rolling back over to try to continue his nap. A soft giggle belled out around Lance. He blinked his eyes open, blearily searching for the source of the sound. Lance looked upwards and brightened instantly at the beautiful brown eyes and warm smile hovering near him.

“Mama!”  Lance cried with a grin and he surged upwards into her waiting arms. His mother laughed as she was blown backwards a few inches from the force of his hug, bouncing him against her.

“Hello, my little one; it’s time for you to wake up.” Lance’s hummed lightly and tried to bury himself further into his mother’s arms, sighing contently as he closed his eyes against her chest. “Oh, I see.” Lance’s mother raised an eyebrow as she looked down at her son, eyes glittering mischievously, “So that’s how it’s going to be, is it?"

Lance’s frowned in confusion, and then shrieked loudly, eyes flying open as his mother tossed  him up and gave him a merciless raspberry right in the center of his stomach. Lance squealed and twisted against his mother, whacking his little blue tail against her shoulder in an effort to get her to stop. Lance’s mother just laughed, loud and hearty, and spun her son around once more, her long emerald tail kicking up clouds of bubbles around them before letting him go. Lance shot away from his mother, panting hard and trying, but failing, to fight the grin that kept pulling at his mouth as he gave her a put-upon look. Lance’s father swam up behind his mother, snickering at the pout on his youngest son’s face.

Lance gave his father an indignant look and opened his mouth to tell his dad just what he thought of his father snickering at him when he was bowled over by his eldest brother from behind and they went spinning through the water towards their parents. Lance screeched and flailed as he tumbled through the waves, his brother’s tail and arms wrapped tightly around him and laughing hard at Lance’s surprise. Mrs. McClain shot out of the way but their father was hit directly by his children and sent reeling with a startled noise that gave way to a booming laugh. Lance giggled breathlessly as his brother’s flipping came to a slow stop, beaming up at him and crying “Again, again!”

Lance’s craned his neck around as he heard his other siblings calling out to him, chuckling and swimming towards them. He grinned lopsidedly at them and reached back a hand, opening his mouth to call out their names-

Lance yelped as he slid off the bed and onto the floor with a crash. He lay awkwardly on the floor, stunned for a moment before letting out a low groan and pressing his face into the cold ground.  The lights were too bright, his head was pounding, and he could barely breathe through his nose. Lance groaned again. He resituated himself more comfortably on the floor and let out a soft sigh. He hadn’t had a dream like that in a year, since he first enrolled at the Garrison and was dealing with a serious bout of homesickness. The dream had been a memory from when he was little and his family still lived in the ocean off the coast of Cuba. It was necessary for Mers to live underwater when they were first born in order to develop their gills, fins, and tails properly. They lived there for a few years until Lance was strong enough to switch between human and Mer without trouble. After that, his family had moved back onto the surface to the house they’d been living in before Lance had been born. His grandparents had been taking care of the house while they were gone, and they were thrilled to have Lance and his family back with them where they could be safe from prying human eyes.

Lance groaned again as he pushed himself up, tossing his blankets haphazardly on his bed and padding towards his bathroom for a quick shower. He missed his family. He missed their weekly trips to the ocean so much that his legs and chest physically ached. But, Lance mused as he turned on the hot water, shedding his blue lion pajamas and stepping in, maybe the dream had been because of their recent mission rather than the usual surge of homesickness.

They’d gone to a new planet on one of their diplomatic missions, hoping to convert the locals to their cause. What Lance hadn’t know going in was that the planet had been largely based in aquatic species, with huge cities like lanterns and beautiful glass domes covering the seafloor, some of them rising like beacons above the surface. It had been so warm, colorful, and brightly lit, teeming with several species of humanoid-esque sea creatures of all colors and sizes. There were even a few ancient-looking Mers the size of whales! Lance indulged in a nostalgic sigh as he turned over every detail of the city in his mind. The ancient Mers had turned out to be the elders that Allura and the paladins were to meet with for negotiations. His eyes slipped closed, remembering how their low, grating rumbles had echoed through him like the sea itself.

Lance had wanted nothing more than to swim with them; to shed his human form and feel the water rushing across his gills and the scent of the ocean and its life wafting between his fins. It’d been so long since he stretched his tail and seen his scales reflecting the sunlight in the clear water. Lance smiled lightly to himself as he let the water run over his face, soothing some of the ache in his head and legs. Lance loved his human form, truly.  As far as he was concerned he had the best of both worlds, but he knew firsthand how dangerous revealing himself could be.

Lance’s smile faded as he let his thoughts wander from the beach and his favorite haunts back to the water. Another pang passed through him. He longed desperately to be back in the ocean. He needed it. Lance hadn’t gotten a chance to transform since they’d entered their wild space adventure, and his skin was starting to feel uncomfortable and wrong.

Lance frowned as he thought it out. Maybe there was still time before training. He could skip breakfast and that would give him a chance to just transform real quick in the shower so he could check out his scales and air out his fins. He could feel the water on them again and see if there were any problems that needed taking care of. Lance began bouncing on his toes, practically vibrating out of his skin already. The promise of feeling water against his tail outweighing the fear of his team finding him. His skin was itching and crawling with the anticipation of switching to his scales.  Lance decided that he’d just take a quick second to switch when he heard the telltale Beep of the castle comms.

*Paladins. Please come to the dining room for further debriefing on yesterday’s mission.*

Lance groaned loudly, slouching over in the shower. Of course Allura would call everyone in for an impromptu meeting. Lance sighed and reluctantly shut off the water. There’s no way he could switch now. If he was late the others would come looking for him, and then what was he supposed to tell them? That he was half-fish and he was sorry he didn’t say anything because he was too scared they would reject him? Lance grimaced, wincing at the twinge in his legs as he dried off and put on his paladin armor. Yeah, that will go over well. Lance’s chest wasn’t aching any less, but at least the hot condensation had soothed his headache to a mild throb. Lance ambled out to breakfast, praying training wouldn’t be too bad. The buzzing beneath his skin didn’t go away.

**********

Holy. Crow. Forget everything he’d previously said Lance felt like he was burning . His skin was crawling and he kept twitching in discomfort, rubbing his legs against each other to assuage the itching. Allura droned on about the successes of their mission and where each of the paladins could have done better, not noticing Lance’s movements, or if she did, electing to ignore him. The congestion had come back with a vengeance, and this time it had settled in Lance’s lungs making it really hard not to cough. He stifled another bout just barely and received an annoyed side-eye from Allura as Shiro began addressing her and the team. Yep. She’d noticed. Lance huffed and hunched down more, trying to stay out of the line of fire.

He was so caught up in trying not to cause a scene that he didn’t notice Hunk leaning over to him.  “Are you ok?”

Lance jumped slightly as he felt Hunk’s breath flicker past his ear but quickly composed himself.  He nodded, leaning his head slightly down to Hunk’s to murmur back, “Yeah buddy don’t worry. It’s just a little congestion.”

“Are you sure?”  Hunk frowned. “You’ve been squinting pretty hard there too.”

Lance sighed. Of course Hunk had noticed. Hunk always noticed if something was wrong with him. He took a deep breath, trying to calm his lungs before responding. “It’s just a little headache.  Really Hunk, I’m fi-”

“Lance, Hunk!” Lance and Hunk both jerked away from each other and shot up straight. Lance saw the other three paladins startle in his periphery, equally alarmed by Allura’s outburst. She glared down at Hunk and Lance, nostrils flaring slightly. She took a deep breath and spoke calmly, but her eyes were glinting in a manner that had Lance wincing more than the stupid overly bright lights above them. “Is there something you’d care to share with the rest of the team? Since you obviously think it’s so important that it cannot wait until we’re done.”

Lance shook his head violently, then stopped when he saw spots dancing in front of his eyes. “Nope, no we’re um, we’re good Princess sorry.” He coughed pointedly at Hunk who was giving him a disbelieving look.

Shiro frowned at Hunk’s expression. “Hunk?”

Hunk glanced at his leader who was gazing at him, patient but worried, then back at Lance who was glaring at him out of the corner of his eye. Hunk bit his lip nervously. “Lance is sick!” He blurted.

“Hunk!!” Lance threw his arms in the air and turned on his best friend, annoyed glare in full force.

Hunk huffed a protest. “I’m sorry buddy, but you always do this. It’s not good for you!”

The other paladins sat up straighter. Allura looked slightly confused and Shiro was already making his way over to Lance, concern coming off of him in waves. Lance reeled back from everyone and pushed Shiro’s hand away from his forehead, scrambling up. “Guys I’m fine!  It’s just a little headache and congestion, probably just caught some dumb space cold or something.”

Shiro frowned but backed away some. Keith was studying Lance like he could determine what was wrong if he just looked hard enough. Pidge just made an exasperated noise. “Oh my gosh Lance, not again. It’s fine if you’re sick, okay? Just let us know so you can take things easy if you need to.”

Lance grit his teeth. “I said I’m fine . I don’t need to ‘take it easy’ it’s just a little cold.”

Pidge gave him an unimpressed look. “Garrison, Monday, November 23rd? The Physics test? You said that was just a ‘little cold’ too.” Keith glanced at her a curious expression on his face while Hunk groaned, muttering under his breath “ I remember”.

Okay in my defense-”

“Enough, all of you!”  Shiro cut in, rubbing the bridge of his nose.  He looked up at Lance once everyone quieted down and addressed him directly.  “Are you good to train today?”

“Yes.”  Lance replied without hesitation.

Shiro and Allura shared a look before she nodded and turned to Lance. “If you’re not too ill then I think it would be fine if you continued training with the team for the day. However, a sick paladin is a serious thing because it could affect our readiness to form Voltron. So if you do get worse, you are to inform Coran or I so we can take care of it, understand?”

Lance huffed. “Yes, okay fine.”

Allura smiled at him and hesitated a moment, before reaching out to ruffle his hair, eliciting a squawk from Lance. “Besides,” She smiled warmly, “We can’t have our Blue Paladin getting too sick on us because he didn’t take care of himself.”

Lance gaped at Allura as she turned around and began giving Coran the training instructions for the day. Well that was unexpected.

Everyone quickly filed out of the room after Shiro. Keith and Hunk shot Lance suspicious looks a few times but he ignored them. He would be fine. He was just a little irritable because of the dream and the weird itching. Lance decided he’d just take it easy and maybe check over his scales later. There. Lance nodded to himself as he activated his bayard, beginning the training sequence with the team. Now that he had a plan, Lance felt better already.

**********

Lance groaned as he face-planted into his bed, sighing into the mess of blankets from earlier that morning. How many times was he going to be wrong in one day? The universe was against him.  Lance was sure of it.

True to her word, Allura had kept the paladins training the entire day. They’d mostly worked on combat training and had ended the day flying formations in their lions. Shiro had kept an eye on Lance and pulled him from hand-to-hand, but they let him continue with most of the team-building exercises. Lance didn’t appreciate being relegated to reviewing basic forms while the others fought, but nothing he said could sway Shiro’s mind. If he were being honest with himself - which he always was obviously - he’d admit he was glad he didn’t have to spar with Keith today. Being thrown to the mat did not sound like fun with the way his body was protesting today.

Blue had been worried the instant Lance had stepped into her cockpit. He managed to convince her that he wasn’t about to die, and that he was just a little sick. But Blue still kept up a soft undercurrent of purring behind his head as they flew, and if she took control a little too much during the harder maneuvers, well there was nothing Lance could say to change her mind. She’d ignored his indignant exclamations each time. Blue just snuffed at him through their bond, causing Lance’s hair to fluff up as if she’d actually blown on his head, then continued flying.

Needless to say, Lance was exhausted. Everything ached and the itching that had been running in random bursts and patches in his legs had moved to his hips and arms. It was at the point where Lance felt like there was a semi-constant, dull fire underneath his skin. He wanted nothing more than to sleep it off and wake up better. Too tired to do more than toss his armor on the floor and call out in a croaky voice for the lights to dim, Lance buried himself in the blankets and drifted off into an uneasy sleep.

The next day didn’t get any better. In fact, Lance seemed to be steadily getting worse. The burning was now continuous through his legs, but alongside the burning, new patches of pain were creeping up. Lance had to cover up a wince more than once at a sudden flare up during meetings, training, and meals. Hunk had noticed how Lance seemed to have a difficult time moving and was now keeping an annoyingly close eye on him. He’d conscripted the others into watching Lance as well. This meant that whenever Lance tried to go off alone, someone else inevitably showed up to keep him company. Which was great and all, usually Lance would be ecstatic, but he hadn’t had a moment’s peace to check his tail because of it, which only served to further sour Lance’s mood.

He managed to brush off most of his friends’ concern. Blue, however, was having none of it. When it came time for lion training she refused to allow Lance to perform any maneuvers she deemed “too hazardous” for his current condition, leaving Lance seething and at his breaking point. He was tired, in constant pain, and his congestion had decided to permanently move to his lungs making his voice scratchy and sore. Allura was at a loss as to what to have the paladins do next, so Shiro took over and proclaimed the rest of the day be spent with light paladin bonding activities as a team. An evening of playing games and trading jokes and stories had Lance’s spirits lifted considerably, something that everyone on the team noted with some relief. The pain hadn’t subsided any, but Lance was grateful for his team anyways. They went to bed relieved that Lance was finally feeling well again.

It wasn’t until Lance’s third day of dealing with the random bursts of pain, lightheadedness, coughing, and discomfort that everything finally hit the fan.

**********

Lance yelped as his body spasmed underneath his sheets, jerking up onto his elbows as he tried to get the convulsions in his torso and legs under control. They only lasted for a few seconds but it was enough to leave Lance sweating and panting for breath. He threw back the sheets and checked the time.

Crap . He’d missed breakfast and morning training was starting in 10 minutes. Lance jerked himself up, swaying slightly before steadying himself. Okay, there was no way he could do training today. The others were bound to notice and honestly he was not interested in dealing with whatever this sickness was on top of Allura’s regularly scheduled torture fests. Lance haphazardly threw on his gear, praying and begging that whatever was going on had nothing to do with his other form. If it did, Lance didn’t know what he’d do. The thought of having to reveal his heritage was paralyzing.

Every step Lance took towards the training deck was agony. Pain like barbs shot through his feet and up his hips making him let out small cries every few steps. He needed help - now. Lance staggered into the training room just as his team was finishing their first sparring session.

Shiro glanced up at the sound of the door opening and gave Lance a smile. “Nice of you to join us Lance! We weren’t sure you’d be up for it, so we were planning to let you sleep in a litt-” Shiro froze as he turned fully to face Lance. Lance was sickeningly pale and sweating profusely, clinging to the wall to hold himself up. There were dark reddish bruises under Lance’s eyes, and he was shaking so hard his knees were knocking together. Shiro dropped his bayard and ran over. The other paladins stopped sparring at Shiro’s sudden halt. They looked up and when they saw Lance, deactivated their bayards and piled up behind Shiro.

“Lance? What’s wrong?”

“Jeez, you look way worse than yesterday. What were you thinking coming up here in your armor to train?”

Lance tilted his head down and sneezed a hacking cough into his chest, his arms preoccupied with keeping him upright. “I wasn-” He coughed again, sucking in quick shallow breaths before continuing, “I wasn’t. I don’t want to train. Everything hurts.” Shiro came around Lance and gently lifted his hands so he was leaning against the Black Paladin instead of the door frame, hands braced against Shiro’s arms as he spoke.

“Wait, Lance. If you weren’t planning on training today, why did you get into your paladin armor?”  Hunk wrung his hands nervously. Pidge frowned, confused.

“Technically he didn’t even make it into his armor.” Keith muttered. Lance blinked long and slow at Keith, then glanced down to look at himself. Oh . Lance’s arm guards were on the wrong sides, he was missing his left boot, and his chest plate was hanging somewhat loosely.

Anxiety flickered in Keith’s eyes at Lance’s lack of response and he sucked in a sharp breath. Without thinking, he leaned over and put his hand on Lance’s forehead, instantly recoiling at the intense heat under his gloved palm. “Shiro, he’s burning up.”

“Okay.” Shiro shifted Lance slightly as he thought. “Keith, take Lance to his room and get him out of that armor and into something more comfortable.” Keith nodded and moved to take Lance from Shiro, swinging Lance’s arm over his shoulders and pulling most of Lance’s weight onto his hip. “Hunk and Pidge prepare the Medbay. I’ll send Coran to you as soon as I find him. I’ll let Allura know the situation as well.” Hunk and Pidge wasted no time replying, taking off in the direction of the Infirmary.

Lance swayed against Keith, taking in Shiro’s orders blearily, stumbling as they suddenly twisted around to move down the hallway. Oh good. Maybe they were going to take Lance somewhere he could cool down. Cold sounded nice right now. Also water. That sounded good too. His skin was raw and crawling rapidly. Water would help. Lance was confident in that. They staggered down the hall, Keith trying to talk to him but Lance wasn’t having any of it. Keith’s voice kept fading in and out and Lance just knew he was doing it on purpose to mess with Lance’s headache. So why should Lance bother to listen to anything Keith had to say? Maybe he’d be nice though and bring Lance some water when they got to wherever they were going.

“...es Lance… get you some water… but please try to focus…Hunk and...okay?”

Lance jolted and hissed, movements uncoordinated. The pain was building and he felt so sick. Oh by the seas, please make it stop. Lance felt Keith pull him forward, speeding up at the pained sounds Lance was emitting.

“...We’re almost there…-old on Lance.”

Lance was gasping by the time they got to his room. He felt like he was choking on the phlegm coating his throat. Keith set him down and started ripping the armor pieces off of Lance in a panic. His hands were shaking and he was trying to talk to Lance, but Lance still couldn’t hear him. Water, he needed water. He needed to change please, he begged.

“Ok Lance…getting you some water…-ay here.” Keith turned and raced out of the room, sprinting for the kitchen.

As soon as Keith was gone, Lance pulled himself up and staggered, panting over to the shower. He threw the water onto its coldest setting and started pulling desperately at his black undersuit, dragging it off as the shower cascaded down him until he was shuddering there in just his boxers, arms wrapped tightly around himself. He couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t think. Everything was tearing underneath his skin. Off, he needed it off. Lance scrabbled desperately at his legs. Sharp stabs hit his chest and stomach repeatedly and he doubled over. He heard a voice screaming but he couldn’t tell where it was coming from. He arched back as he clawed at his legs. Lance barely registered his mouth wide open or his raw throat as the agonized cries filled his ears.

**********

Keith moved down the hall towards the bedrooms as quickly as he could without spilling the large glass of water he was carrying. He’d never seen Lance so sick. The desperate way he’d cried for water shook Keith to the core. It was his crying that had finally pushed Keith over the edge and sent him for a cup for Lance. He didn’t like leaving him alone in that state, babbling incoherently and moaning in pain, but Lance had sounded so desperate. Keith sped up slightly. The sooner he made it back to Lance the better.

Keith had just made it to the hallway closest to the bedrooms when a horrible scream pierced the air. His body went numb and the cup slipped from his hand, crashing to the floor. Racking screams tore through him and Keith was sprinting, calling Lance’s name over and over again. He shot past the door and burst into the bathroom, skidding to a halt as he took in the horrific sight before him.

Lance’s torso was covered in reddish bruises and he was screaming, clawing at his legs and hips so hard that they were bleeding. But the biggest shock was the stone-like pieces he saw stuck randomly along Lance’s hips, legs, arms, torso; they were everywhere. He was faintly aware that they were probably once blue, but the color was either faded or hidden under dark growth that clung between the pieces and stretched across Lance’s skin in patches. A white, filmy substance was curling out from his ears and along his arms and spine. Keith’s throat closed and he froze, stricken with more terror than he’d felt when the Red Lion had stalled while he was facing Zarkon. Another gurgling scream had Keith throwing himself down at Lance’s side. He grabbed Lance’s hands and drug them away from his legs as Lance fought against him, hissing and twisting to escape Keith’s grip. Keith pushed down a wave of nausea as he took in Lance’s hands. His nails had sharpened and extended considerably, causing deep gouges in his legs that made the water run a sickly pink. It pooled beneath their feet and swirled down the drain, leaving trails along the tile floor.

This was beyond Keith’s capability to handle-- beyond any of their capability to handle. He felt hysterical as he pinned a struggling Lance’s arms to his sides. And now Lance was actually snapping his teeth at him. Whatever this illness was, it was far more serious than Coran or anyone else had assumed. Keith crouched down and with a grunt hauled Lance over his shoulder in a fireman's carry, keeping Lance’s arms as secure as he could. Keith whipped around, not even bothering to shut the water off as he ran from Lance’s room, hitting the emergency button by the bedroom door with his elbow on his way. What kind of sick alien virus could have transformed Lance into this?

Keith burst into the Medbay, skidding to a halt in front of his startled teammates who’d gathered frantically at the sound of the alarm. Panic coursed through the other paladins as they took in Keith’s gasping form and Lance twisting and screaming over his shoulder. Hunk screamed and Pidge shot forward.

“Oh my gosh, Lance!”

“Keith! Keith, what happened, what’s wrong with him?”

Shiro and Allura lifted Lance’s squirming form off of Keith’s shoulder and pulled him over to the pods, immediately preparing one for stasis until Coran could help them figure out what was wrong. Lance’s screams had died down to choked gasping, eyes blown wide and his back still arching with each pained inhalation.

Coran was fumbling with the pod’s controls as Allura and Shiro finally managed to get Lance inside. Keith leaned against Pidge, breathing hard. He squeezed his eyes shut against Lance’s cries, and flinched when they were cut off by the pod closing. The weight of what had happened crashed down around Keith and he slid against Pidge who yelped and struggled to help him sit down.

Keith saw Hunk staring into the pod, face gray at the sight of his limp best friend. He was frozen, hands pressed against his mouth like he’d forgotten they were there, eyes teary and blown wide.  Pidge shot Shiro a slightly desperate look as she held Keith. Shiro left Coran and Allura to hover by the pod and watch for the results of the scans in order to come over to Keith and Pidge. Shiro placed a firm hand on Keith’s shoulder and Keith drug his eyes over to look at his oldest friend and brother.

“Keith. I know this is rough, but I need you to tell us what you saw.” Shiro smiled gently down at Keith, but it didn’t reach his eyes. Everyone except for Coran stilled and looked at Keith, hoping he could provide them with some answers.

Keith swallowed hard, then spoke shakily. “He- he was incoherent when we were walking to his room. He kept muttering and asking for water.” He gulped and Shiro squeezed his shoulder. Keith sucked in a deep breath, grounding himself in the familiar presence before continuing. “He seemed like he was in so much pain. I just wanted to get him back to the Medbay, but he sounded so desperate, and he kept pleading. I don’t even think he realized it. So, I left him and ran to get him some.” Keith hunched into himself with a moan, pressing his hands into his eyes. “I’m sorry Shiro I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have done that; I should have stayed with him. If I had then maybe-”

“No Keith, no.” Shiro knelt down and pulled his little brother into his arms. “It wasn’t your fault.  You didn’t know. None of us did.”

“But we should have.” Pidge interjected bitterly. “We saw he was sick. We should have known when Blue refused to let him do any flying that something was seriously wrong.” Her hands were clenched into fists, the nails digging into her palms as she shook.

“Well, Keith leaving was probably a good thing in the long run.” The paladins startled and turned to Coran who was gazing intensely at the readings before him, brow furrowed.

“What do you mean, Coran?” Allura asked as she walked over to him.

“I think I know what’s happened, but with Lance only being partially transformed, I can’t tell for sure.” Coran pressed the button to open the pod ignoring the shocked and protesting exclamations from the other paladins. Hunk yelped and scrambled forward, catching Lance who started twitching and shaking violently the moment he was free from the pod. He was completely unconscious.

Transformed?-

“Coran! What the heck, man? Why would you let him out?”

Coran ran over to the other side of the room and started pressing buttons, causing a chamber to come out of the wall. “In the case of aliens who are primarily aquatic, we have this chamber to help treat them in a more natural environment.” The paladins watched wide-eyed as the odd tank rapidly filled with water. Hunk tightened his grip on Lance. “Get him to the water quickly. He needs to finish transforming. Being in this half form is only doing him more harm.” Hunk looked shocked.

Keith’s mind reeled. Half-form? Transforming? What was happening to Lance?

Allura seemed to take Coran’s instruction in stride. Before Hunk could do more than protest she’d lifted the Blue Paladin out of his arms and placed him in the water. Everyone held their breath as they watched. At first, nothing happened. Then, Lance started to change. He whimpered and squirmed in the water before settling as his legs elongated and fused together, the stone-like pieces along his hips; scales , Keith’s shocked brain helpfully supplied, soon covered his lower half. Fins grew out from his ears and back, and a few trailed along his arms. Keith couldn’t believe it. Pidge let out a soft “oh” and Hunk squeaked in shock. A mermaid. Lance looked like a mermaid. No, not just ‘looked like’, Lance, somehow, was a mermaid, er, merman.

Even in his daze, Keith knew instantly that something was wrong. He felt it in his gut, a pooling sense of deep anxiety as his eyes took in the dropping, haggard fins. They were almost see-through now instead of just white, and still seemed foamy and wisping. His scales were darkened and oozing an unnatural substance all over his tail. The patches of rotting and grayed scales continued up Lance’s torso, along his arms, and on his cheeks. Everywhere the scales were they were cracking and covered with a moldy substance. The tips of Lance’s fingers and his carefully manicured nails had extended into unnaturally blackened claws, chipped and bleeding. His skin and the area around his gills were bruised and red, the dark bags under his eyes worse than this morning. His gills looked inflamed, a foamy, white substance oozing out whenever Lance breathed. Keith felt like he was going to be sick.

Hunk gagged at the sight of his friend. Shiro’s grip on Keith had tightened to the point that it started to hurt. He was staring at Lance as if seeing him for the first time. Pidge’s eyes were wide as saucers and brimming with tears. Allura and Coran inhaled sharply.

Lance whined pitifully and began to cry, tears streaming from his closed eyes. His fins fluttered weakly against his head as he tilted his face towards the paladins, like he was trying to sense them. Lance’s hands raised weakly towards them. A desperate keening call broke from his throat and shot straight down Keith’s spine. Keith ran towards Lance without hesitation, Shiro and the others right behind him. Without even thinking about it he grabbed onto Lance’s outstretched hands and began rubbing soothing circles into them. Lance’s keening sobs quieted at the touch and he leaned towards Keith, unconsciously seeking him. The other paladins looked on in shock. Tears were rolling down Hunk’s cheeks, and Pidge was clinging wide-eyed to the edge of the tank. Keith noticed that at Lance’s cry, everyone in the room had moved closer to surround the tank and Lance from all sides. He seemed to quiet slightly at the proximity, but his whimpers didn’t stop.

Coran stepped forward purposefully, breaking the tension. “The good news is, I know what this is. The bad news, he’s in the final stage. Which means we need to get him into a healing pod-- now.”

Pidge piped up, “Final stage?”

“Yes. His fever is dangerously high and he’s begun hemorrhaging. Shiro, Hunk, lift Lance and get him into that pod."

Keith and Pidge balked at Coran’s blunt explanation. Horror gripped Keith’s gut. Shiro managed to rouse himself enough to pull Hunk forward and together they gently lifted Lance out of the tank and carried him towards the pod that Coran was busily setting up. “The pod should take care of the internal bleeding and any other injuries he’s sustained, but the rest of the infection will have to be waited out the old-fashioned way.”

Hunk grunted as he held onto Lance’s arms, Shiro supporting his tail. “Jeez Lance, and I thought I was heavy, what the heck man? What are you eating? Also, Coran, Coran my man what do you mean internal bleeding. What is going on, why is my best friend a fish? I thought those pods were supposed to fix everything? Wait, how are we supposed to stand him up in that thing with this tail? Also, is this because of that illness or was Lance a fish all along, because I think I’d know if my best friend was half-”

“Hunk.” Shiro called, “Breathe.”

Coran, for his part, look offended. “Of course he was already part- er, whatever he is! This illness doesn’t do that! It’s an infection that’s common on Vellugher.”

Keith gaped as Pidge pulled him to his feet with a sharp grunt. They trailed nervously behind Hunk and Shiro. “Wait, you mean that water planet we just visited?” She asked.

“Yep!  That’s the one!” Coran’s voice was slightly high and he nodded jerkily as he helped Hunk and Shiro somehow muscle Lance into the pod and shut the door. He typed rapidly at the keys, jittering. “See the virus is actually really common on Vellugher. It starts with congestion in the lungs, for the aquatic creatures that have them, and mild scale and fin rot in patches. That’s when most people are able to recognize the disease and get it treated. After that comes a growth that starts eating away at the scales and the sensitive skin underneath and between. The pre-final stage is a dangerously high fever that overlaps with the final stage which is hemorrhaging of the internal organs. That’s indicated by reddish bruising around the eyes, gills, and on the skin. The screaming was likely due to the sensation of the infection finally eating away at the internal tissues. At that point, most of the infected don’t have the kind of advanced medical treatment required to fix it so they end up dying.” Coran was visibly shaking now, voice climbing higher as he spoke.

Allura looked confused, hands clasped in front of her dress as she glanced worriedly at Lance.  “But Coran, I thought that it takes at least a week, sometimes more, for the symptoms to run their full course. Was he suffering like this for the past week or longer, and we just didn’t know?”

“Oh no, Lance most definitely caught this on Vellugher. He couldn’t have been exposed to it recently enough otherwise. Normally the aliens who visit Vellugher get immunized but I-”  Coran was pulling at his mustache, muttering and fussing as he started putting away various instruments and pulling others out to set the room up for when Lance came out. Allura frowned at him in concern. “I didn’t- I should’ve-   had no idea any of you possessed aquatic characteristics. Otherwise I would have gotten you all vaccinated. I should have anyways, this never would have happened if I’d just-” Coran shook violently as he spoke, voice thick and eyes far away.

Allura placed her hand gently over Coran’s, effectively halting his erratic movements. Keith watched worriedly from where he stood near Shiro. “It’s not your fault.” She whispered.

Shiro sighed, running a hand dejectedly through his hair. “Allura’s right. I’m the leader. I should have noticed Lance was hiding something from us.”

Angry exclamations met Shiro’s words.

“What? Oh come on Shiro, we’re just as much to blame as you.”

“Keith’s right. We’re all at fault here… even Lance.”

“Yeah, Shiro. I mean, Lance is my best friend. If I didn’t know how could any of the rest of you?”

“Okay, okay.” Shiro raised his hands against the protests. “I get it.”

Keith turned to glare at Pidge. “How is this Lance’s fault? We never gave him a moment’s peace alone; when could he have found out about this?”

Pidge gazed at him in disbelief. “Do you really think that Lance would have told us even if he’d known what was wrong? He has a history of pulling crap like this. He hides that he’s feeling under the weather until he’s sick as a dog and passing out. And how do you even know he wasn’t aware of it, and just didn’t want to tell us?” Her lip wobbled slightly as she spoke. “He didn’t trust us, Keith.”

Keith flinched and Hunk cast his eyes down. Shiro seemed conflicted, and Keith could tell he was still blaming himself. Allura glanced at the pod with a sigh, “I suppose we’ll just have to ask him when he wakes.” Everyone nodded and turned back to the pod, gazing at Lance’s limp form. There was nothing they could do now but wait.

Chapter 2: Fish Out of Water

Summary:

Yeah, time for Lance to wake up! XD

Notes:

"asteráki" means "little star" in Greek from what I've read, so that's what Allura means when she calls Lance that.

Chapter Text

The second thing Lance was aware of was the dull ache pulsing through his veins. And that’s what startled him the most. Pain was all he’d been feeling for days now.  et, it wasn’t the sickness or the anxieties that had been plaguing him recently that he first noticed. It was a burst of cold, the sensation of falling. Then, the gentle push and pull of water. A current gently circled his body and tail, gliding soothingly around him. Lance breathed in deep, sighing as the tension bled out of his body at the sensation. He faintly registered the sound of voices talking around him, but Lance wasn’t concerned. Though he didn’t recognize the voices in his hazy state, an instinctual pull within him told him they were members of his pod. The peace of his family surrounding him and the pull of the water lulled Lance back into darkness. Smiling, Lance let himself sink into the swirling arms of his oldest friend.

The next time Lance awoke he was aware that only part of his body was resting in the water. The lights were bright even behind his eyelids, and he felt like he was trying to claw out of a deep sleep. As awareness slowly came to him, Lance distinctly felt himself lying on a raised but comfortable surface, head and upper chest above water. A soft, sponge-like material was lying behind his head like a pillow. His scales and fins felt odd and heavy. Shifting carefully, Lance registered thick bandages and what felt like a cool salve spread underneath that a salve. He felt an odd prick in his arm that he recognized as an IV. Lance’s skin crawled slightly at the thought of someone’s hands on his scales, but he pushed the feeling down.

Lance turned his head to the sound of voices. That’s when his brain caught up to the fact that not only was he transformed, which he couldn’t deny felt heavenly, but there were also people in the room with him. Oh quiznack, his teammates. Lance tried to crack open his eyes to see who was talking, but was blinded almost immediately and snapped them shut again, groaning softly.

“-ance? Lance, are you waking up?”

Maybe he could pretend to be asleep or dead or something. Anything so he wouldn’t have to face his friends like this.

There was an annoyed huff above him. “You’re not getting out of this, Lance. We need to check your vitals.” Lance groaned. That was Allura, and from the tone he’d be much better off doing as she said.

Lance cracked one eye open and then the other, the blurry figure of Allura’s face swimming in front of his eyes before finally steadying and solidifying. She shot him a warm smile as soon as she saw him awake. “Sorry, ‘Llura. Lights.” He croaked, coughing violently. The phlegm coating his throat where his gills were was making it hard to speak.

“Oh!” Allura’s eyes widened. “One moment Lance!” She disappeared from view and Lance blinked rapidly, trying to clear his vision more. He seemed to be lying in a tub of water that was being filtered to mimic currents. His bed was a raised piece of flooring that had been padded to make him more comfortable. The lights around him dimmed slightly and he felt himself relax.

Lance shot Allura a shy smile in return, conscious of his tail and fins on prominent display. “Thanks.”

“It’s no problem at all my boy!” Coran quickly bounced into view. Lance didn’t miss the heavy bags under his eyes or the relieved undertone in his bright grin and began to relax further. Maybe it would be okay.

Lance sighed. “What happened?”

Coran’s smile faltered. “You caught a virus on Vellugher. The infection had taken a firm hold and you were hemorrhaging by the time we found you.”

Lance smiled weakly. “So, not a space cold then?”

Coran chuckled softly, leaning over to ruffle Lance’s hair in such a fatherly gesture that a sense of longing pulled at Lance’s gut before he quickly dismissed it. He couldn’t go home, not yet. “No,”  Coran murmured, smile not quite reaching his eyes. “I guess not.”

Lance squinted at Coran, then frowned. “It’s not your fault, Coran.”

Coran blinked at him in surprise. A laugh bubbled out of him, more genuine than the one before. “You never cease to amaze me, my boy.” This time his grin reached his eyes, making them dance in the light.

Lance smirked at both of them, leaning back with his hands behind his head, before deciding that was too exhausting and resting them back down by his sides. “Well, I am the best and most amazing paladin here.”

Allura rolled her eyes but Lance detected a hint of fondness in them and his heart soared. Maybe things would just go back to normal. Maybe, they weren’t mad. Maybe, maybe things could even be better than normal now that they knew.

Coran’s expression turned serious for a moment and Lance flinched, sobering immediately. Coran clasped his hands behind his back and straightened up, looking Lance straight in the eye. “I do have to apologize though, Lance. I had to coat and wrap all of your scales and fins in order to treat them. I do hope you’ll forgive me for touching them without your permission. I know how improper and violating it is in many cultures, but your health was at stake and I couldn’t wait for you to awaken. I promise I did not touch your gills. I made sure to give you an injection of medicine to help clear them up until you could handle cleaning them yourself.”

Lance gaped at Coran through his speech. He couldn’t believe it. Objectively, Lance knew that Coran had experience with species similar to him, but he wasn’t expecting the older altean to understand his people’s conventions and boundaries so well. That Coran thought to show Lance, who knew he had only barely outgrown being a youngling, such respect and kindness was too much. His eyes welled up. “Thank you,” he gasped through the hot tears streaming down his cheeks. He indulged himself in a moment of childishness and leaned up towards Coran, arms outstretched. Coran smiled-- warm, kind, and full-- and stepped forward, allowing Lance to pull him down into as tight a hug as his weakened muscles could manage.

Lance let go when his arms started shaking too much to maintain his grip, but he didn’t pull away fully. Coran seemed to understand and gently placed his hand over Lance’s, even as he softly pressed Lance back down onto his bed.

Allura smiled at the exchange. She moved towards Lance, drawing his eyes from Coran’s to hers.  “The other paladins will be glad to know you’ve woken up.” Lance flinched and his eyes darted to the door and then away, shoulders tensing. He bit his lip, looking down as his eyes glossed over with more tears. “Do they-” He stopped, gulping before continuing in a whisper, refusing to look at Allura or Coran. “Do they hate me? For, for hiding this from them?” His voice was so small Allura could barely hear him. “They’re afraid of me… aren’t they?”

“Oh no, Lance. Do not think that.” Allura came over to his other side and gently clasped his hand, reaching her thumb out to soothe the furrow in his brow. “They’ve been so worried. They wanted to wait here the whole time for you to wake up. They nearly did.” She laughed lightly. “It took me forever to get them to go back to their rooms for a few hours rest. That’s why they’re not here right now. It’s pretty late.” Allura smirked. “That, and I figured their concern and questions would be too overwhelming.” Lance flashed her a grateful look.

She smiled down at him, soft and kind. “We don’t hate you, Lance.” She squeezed his shoulder, mindful of the bandages. “None of us could ever hate you. And they’re not afraid of you either.  They blame themselves more than anything. For you getting sick, for letting it get this bad, and that you felt so afraid to tell them about this.” Lance curled in one himself.

Allura sighed at the motion. “Oh, asteráki.” She murmured, turning to card her fingers gently through his hair. “Do not be afraid, and do not feel guilty. They have already accepted you.”

Lance felt a warmth spread through his veins as more of the medicine Coran was giving him kicked in and he drifted off, altean lullabies and soft hands humming through him as he slept.

**********

“-Oh man, Lance you wouldn’t believe it. You had to have been there, buddy. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Keith react like that.” A booming laugh accompanied the words. “Not that Kaltenecker was too happy about the whole thing either. Don’t worry though, Pidge got it all on video and even backed up the files cause Keith tried to delete them. Whoo, now that’s another good story-”

Lance smiled as he heard the rambling. Hunk . He was still lying on the makeshift bed in the tank, the water gently lapping against him. He could feel less bandages and Lance surmised that a few days had passed since he’d woken up and spoken to Coran and Allura. The thought was disconcerting, but Lance had been close to death from what Coran told him. So he supposed it was understandable.

Lance shifted slightly as Hunk continued to ramble on. He was debating how much longer to lay there just listening to his best friend. He was not looking forward to the conversation they’d have once Hunk realized he was awake. The decision, however, was made for him when he twisted a little too far and let out a pained yelp, eyes flying open. Lance hunched over and gripped his side, breathing heavily through his nose.

“Lance!” Hunk leaned over him. “Oh my gosh, are you okay?” His hands flitted above Lance in quick motions, wanting to touch but unsure how welcome it would be, and not wanting to cause any more damage.

Lance hissed out a breath through clenched teeth and gingerly lifted his hand to prod lightly at his side. He smiled placatingly up at his best friend, straightening slowly. “I’m okay. It was just a little twinge.”

Hunk sagged in relief, “Jeez man, you really gave me a scare there! I was worried something else had hurt you, or the- the bleeding had started up again or something.” Hunk let his hands fall, but his eyes scanned every inch of Lance, scrutinizing him for any further injuries. Lance squirmed under the intense gaze.

He smiled a little unsurely up at Hunk, suddenly feeling completely exposed. “N-no it’s all good. Uh, at least, Coran said everything was starting to heal up nicely. I can move around a bit easier now and the pain has gone down some!” He trailed off.

Hunk smiled shyly at him. “That’s great Lance. I’m really happy to hear that, honest! But, I just,”  Hunk sucked in a deep breath fidgeting with his hands. “Lance, why didn’t you tell me?” Hunk looked so forlorn and Lance’s heart squeezed. He hated that he had put that expression on his best friend’s face.

Lance reached his hands over, earnestly grabbing Hunk’s. “I wanted to buddy, believe me! In all my life you were the first person I’d ever met that I actually wanted to tell about this. But come on Hunk, you know how you are.” Lance let go of Hunk’s hands and started gesturing wildly, desperate to get the wounded pout off of his friend’s face. “You read people’s diaries for goodness sake! I know you’d never have hurt me or intentionally told anyone, but how could I take that chance when it meant my pod- I mean, my family, could have been put in serious danger?” He pleaded fervently with Hunk whose composure was quickly cracking. “Please, please Hunk.  You’re my best friend in the whole world, and I’m so sorry for hurting you.” Tears slid down Lance’s cheeks and Hunk sniffed, tears of his own falling in sync. “Please forgive me.”

“Oh, Lance.”  Hunk leaned over and pulled a hiccupping Lance into his arms in a swift and tight bear hug. “Man, you know when you guys cry I start crying.” Lance choked out a watery laugh. “I shouldn’t have reacted the way I did.” He pulled back and gave his buddy a soft look. “You were just trying to protect your family. And I can admit, wholeheartedly and unashamedly, that I am in fact, a snoop. And a completely unrepentant one at that.” Lance burst into laughter. Hunk was grinning fully now as he looked at Lance. Lance was hunched over and wheezing, arms wrapped around his stomach and tears streaming down his face, this time from happiness. Hunk smirked.  “Aside from the mice, we all know I’m the best source for gossip on this ship.”

Lance snorted, teasing as he calmed himself and waggled his eyebrows at his friend. “Not like there’s much competition what with only a few people being on the ship, but sure.” He snickered into his hands.

Hunk pretended to look affronted. He held the expression for a moment, and then they were both dissolving into fits of giggles. They smiled at each other, slightly breathless from their giggling.  Lance looked into Hunk’s eyes, gaze bright and open. “Thank you.” He breathed, warmth flooding his voice.

Hunk grinned. “Scooch over.”

“What? Wait, Hunk!” Lance flailed as Hunk climbed over the edge of the tank and waded in next to him. “Oh my gosh, you’re getting all wet!”

Hunk shrugged, “Eh, the water’s really warm and besides, I miss cuddling with my best bro.”

Lance’s eyes glazed over and teared up. His lip wobbled, “Hermano.”

Hunk pulled himself up onto the bed with a grin and maneuvered so he was sitting behind Lance.  Once he was comfortable he reached out and pulled Lance back between his legs so they could hug and rest easier. Lance immediately sank into Hunk’s warm embrace, turning his torso around so he could slip his arms around his friend. He pressed his face into Hunk’s chest. “Thanks man.”

Hunk hummed happily, carding his fingers through Lance’s hair. “Don’t mention it. What are brothers for? Now, where was I... ? Oh yeah! So anyways, Keith was-”

Brothers. Lance’s heart swelled. He turned his head into Hunk’s chest more, pressing his face against him to hide his broad grin. Lance sank down contentedly, listening to Hunk ramble on about things that had happened while he was out and cracking jokes with him. As he lay there, Lance realized that for the first time since he’d joined the Garrison, he felt completely at home.

**********

Lance was in his human form when Pidge turned up. Coran had wanted him to give his skin a chance to heal alongside his scales. So he complied, carefully switching over earlier that morning once the rest of the bandages had been removed This time he was lying on a cot near his waterbed, back propped up against a mountain of pillows that Hunk had brought in for him.

She wandered in while he was attempting to read an altean book that Coran had brought him. Their wacky space uncle meant well, but even with the pictures Lance couldn’t understand exactly what was going on. He sighed, closing the book. Figures.

“Wow, Lance. Who knew that all it took to make you read willingly was a horrific illness and your own dramatic anime reveal arc.”

Lance perked up immediately, eyes quickly scanning the room until they landed on, “Pidge!” He grinned lopsidedly at her and gestured for her to come closer, patting the side of his bed. “Pull up a seat.” He winked.

Pidge rolled her eyes walking towards him, then turned and grabbed a chair, placing it by his bed. She smirked at him, plopping down. “Thanks, I will.”

Lance pouted. “Aww you’re no fun Pidge.”

“Noted.” She said drily, but the smirk in her eyes betrayed her. Lance grinned back, relaxing against the pillows. He was feeling better, but since he wasn’t quite at 100% Coran, and apparently Shiro as well though Lance had yet to see him, demanded that he not move around too much. They didn’t want to chance aggravating his scales and gills any further. At that, Lance had quit complaining and consented to stay cooped up.

He stretched his arms, yawning leisurely. “So Coran gave me the full rundown of my illness, cause he’s great like that.” Pidge snorted.

“You already had to live through it once -- why would you want a description as well? That’s more Hunk’s and my alley.”

Lance smiled, turning onto his side to face Pidge fully. “Mhmm. Speaking of which, there is something I’m curious about that Coran couldn’t answer.”

“You, curious? Heaven help us all.”

“I’m serious, Pidge.” Lance huffed. Pidge smirked at him, crossing her arms and waiting for Lance to continue. “So, Coran said this thing normally takes a week to set in, right?” Pidge nodded. “So why was my, er, my-”

“Incubation period and subsequent reaction stages?”

Lance stared at Pidge, blinking. She sighed and dropped her arms. “You mean why was your onset and each stage of the illness that you went through heavily truncated, I mean, short compared to everyone else?”

Lance nodded enthusiastically, gesturing, or attempting to. It was difficult to gesture fully with one of his arms partially pinned under his side, but Lance made do. “Yeah, that. Why did it hit so fast?”

Pidge furrowed her brow, tapping her chin as she leaned on her knees, thinking. “Hmm, well I think it’s because you’re technically from an isolated ecosystem. Earth is completely cut off from any other solar system in terms of contact, well, actually that's debatable but I digress. So it makes sense that your body has no natural immunity to any outside illness like the virus you caught. It’s kind of like when the conquistadors and men like them came into new lands. They would wipe out entire populations of people through disease alone, because the people who were native to the land had no natural immunities against things like smallpox.”

Lance scowled. “Yeah, I know.”

Pidge nodded, sympathetic. “I’d guess it’s kind of like that. With no previous exposure or natural immunities, your body wasn’t prepared for the illness. So when it hit, it hit you harder and faster than usual. I’m not sure how much of that is sound, I’m not really a ‘medicine’ person. But something like that would be my guess.”

Lance nodded contemplatively. “Thanks, Pidge.” They settled into a companionable silence for a moment, interrupted only by the occasional fidget from Pidge. Lance hummed. “So Pidge, are you-”

“You’re still you, right?” Pidge blurted suddenly, then drew back, face burning. Lance gaped at her, eyes wide. “I, I mean you look different sure, but what do I care about that. Look at me . I’m not exactly ‘standard girl material’.” She scoffed, a glimmer of annoyance in her eyes that was gone as quickly as it had appeared. Pidge paused, “But, it was so freaky seeing you upset like that.  We were all so worried. And, Keith said you hissed and snapped your teeth at him.”

Lance’s face went through a rush of emotions. “I don’t remember that.” He murmured to himself.  Lance sighed and sank back into the pillows behind him. “But then, there’s a lot from the past week that I don’t remember.”

Pidge bit her lip, guilty. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. Just forget about it.”

“Ahh Pidgey no, it’s okay.” Lance pushed himself up onto his elbows, one hand reaching out to grab Pidge’s wrist. “Hey,”  He said softly, “Pidgey look at me.”

Pidge reluctantly drew her gaze up to meet Lance who grinned at her. “It’s like how Keith is all weird and antisocial and has all these odd mannerisms that we all know are weird,” Pidge snorted and Lance’s grin widened. “Because he’s part Galra, but he’s still Keith. It’s exactly like that.” He shrugged.

Pidge huffed, embarrassed. “I know that. Look, it was dumb okay.”

“Yep!”  Lance interrupted brightly, eyes sparkling mischievously. “Quite dumb indeed Pidgeon, I thought you and Hunk were supposed to be the smart ones.” His smile softened then, voice urgent and sincere, “Hey, I’m not going to leave you, okay?”

Pidge bit her lip and nodded. She hesitated for a moment, then pulled herself up onto the bed. Lance blinked in surprise but shifted slightly so she could be more comfortable. “Tell anyone about this and you won’t have hot water for a year.”

Lance grinned. “Wouldn’t dream of it, Pidgeon.”

Lance squawked as Pidge elbowed him in the side in response. “Oi! Don’t be mean to the invalid.”

Pidge just snorted and pulled out her data pad. “Alright I’ve got questions and I want answers.”

Lance smirked. “Fire away.”

Lance spent the next couple of hours answering as many questions about his biology and history as he could for Pidge, provided they weren’t too personal. He closed his eyes with a smile; Pidge’s excited ramblings the last thing he heard before he drifted off into a peaceful sleep.

Chapter 3: (Just) As I Am

Summary:

We finally get our bonding moments with Keith and then with Shiro! Pre-warning, this is the chapter that mentions the past trauma in Lance's life. It's not heavily described or anything, but there is blood and death.

So much heavy and emotional bonding. It's Team as Family time!

Notes:

I need more soft Keith & Lance interactions in my life and if I have to do it myself, by george, I will.

This is the longest chapter yet and it's all Keith and Lance's fault, I swear.

Why does everything I write hint at klance

Chapter Text

“Alright my boy, I need you to wake up now so I can check you over!”

Lance groaned as Coran’s chipper voice assaulted his ears. The fins on his head twitched irritably. “Ugh, come on Coran. What time even is it? 5 more minutes, please.”

“Why, it’s rather early morning as you paladins would say!” Coran hummed as he started setting various instruments up. Lance groaned and tried to bury himself further into his sponge pillow, tail flapping weakly in the water, splashing a little towards Coran in protest. He rolled a gurney next to Lance’s tank. “Hmm, yes, I think Allura’s probably the only one awake right now. Though, Shiro should be joining her soon! Now, up you get! I’ve let your gills sit long enough. The medicine I’ve been giving you will only do so much, you know. I think your fine motor skills are back enough to give them a thorough cleaning.”

Lance sighed, but finally rolled over and consented to let Coran help him onto the gurney. A couple of blankets and pillows were already set out for him on the makeshift bed. He settled into them as they soaked up the excess water, dampening slightly but not in an uncomfortable way. Coran handed him some small towels, hot water, and an altean salve with instructions to be careful with his neck. Lance rolled his eyes fondly at Coran’s nagging. He set to work while Coran took his vitals and checked the infection.

Lance winced as he gently cleaned the flaps with the water, then dabbed the salve Coran had given him onto his gills. His face twisted in disgust at the sticky, crusted fluid that caked the insides of the sensitive flaps. Lance pulled the cloth away, hissing in pain. His gills ached. The lightest touch sent a shock of pain pounding through his neck and skull. He grit his teeth as he continued to clean, turning over the events of the past week in his mind while Coran worked.

It was about a week since he’d first collapsed in the shower and was taken to the pods. He’d been in the healing pod for a day, then slept fitfully for 3 more days before waking up to Coran and Allura. It had been another day before he saw Hunk, and the next day was when he was there for Pidge. Between the sedatives and infection, Lance hadn’t had much time to take care of his scales or fins himself. As far as Lance was concerned, he’d slept enough in the past week to last a month. It was getting irritating. Coran told him that Shiro and Keith were both in the Medbay regularly, but so far Lance had yet to be awake for either of them. He huffed, annoyed at the thought. Lance gently peeled back another flap, stroking the sensitive fins and hissing sharply.

The medicine Coran had running through the IV stuck in his right arm was helping his gills, but he was right. They needed a thorough cleaning. The medicine had removed the build-up in his throat, but bits of the gooey substance had crusted in his gills and the skin around them was still tender and inflamed. Lance sighed. The good news was that he was well enough that he wouldn’t be sleeping all day. According to Coran, he could start cleaning his gills every morning and evening.

Lance yelped at a particularly tender spot on his neck, dropping the towel and whining pitifully. Coran frowned at him with sympathy, “I’m sorry Lance, but better late than never.” Lance grimaced but reached down to pick up the cloth he’d dropped.

“Yeah, I know. That still doesn’t make it any easi-” Lance cut off, blinking as he heard the door to the Medbay slide open with a soft hiss.  His jaw dropped when he saw a familiar figure nervously step into the room.

“Keith?” Lance gasped. A wide grin broke over his face and his fins fluttered excitedly as Keith made eye contact with him. He waved enthusiastically, beckoning Keith over. Keith’s eyes widened, surprised at seeing Lance awake. He returned Lance’s bright grin with a small smile of his own and walked over, hands pressed into his pockets.

“Hey! I thought you’d be busy training this early in the morning!”

Keith flushed and shrugged. “I mean, normally, yeah, but..” He rubbed the back of his head, embarrassed.

Coran popped up behind Keith piping in. “Oh no! Keith has been in here every morning waiting for you to wake up.” Keith flailed his arms slightly, rocking forward at the sudden proximity and volume. “We told you the others have been worried.” Coran gave Lance a reprimanding look.  

Lance burst out laughing at Keith’s startled squeak. He shot Lance a dark scowl. It was a few seconds before Lance calmed himself down. Lance smiled sheepishly at Coran once his laughter had subsided. “Okay, Coran. Yes, I get it. I know.” He laughed. Keith frowned at the exchange, eyes flickering back and forth between them with a puzzled expression.

Coran nodded, satisfied and left the room. Lance turned his attention back to Keith and smiled. “So,” he drawled, leaning back “What have you been up to this past week, my man?”

Keith snorted. He sat down in the chair next to Lance, crossing his arms leisurely and kicking one leg up to bounce his foot against his knee. “Allura’s been working us all on different missions or training. Says we need to keep morale up for everyone; act like nothing’s wrong.” He scowled.

Lance swept his eyes over Keith, taking in his expression. “Were you,” Lance sucked in a breath as Keith glanced at him. “Were you really in here so often?”

Keith uncrossed his arms and fidgeted slightly. “I- Yeah, I was. Coran’s right.” He said softly, “We were worried about you. I- We care about you.” Keith looked away.

Lance paused, “I know we’ve already talked about the whole Garrison thing before.” He laughed, sucking in a shaky breath. “Yeah, that was an embarrassing conversation. It’s not everyday you’re forced to tell your self-proclaimed rival that the reason you act like an idiot is because of petty jealousy.”

Keith scowled. “You’re not an idiot.” He snapped. “Okay, maybe the jealousy was dumb. But Iverson was a load of crap, and so were those other teachers! You’re plenty talented and vital to our team-”

Lance broke Keith off, waving his arms in Keith’s face and stifling a giggle. “Keith, Keith woah. I know dude. I agree. I just, you know I consider us good friends, right? Like, I tease you a lot, but I’ve never actually hated you. Not even at the Garrison. In fact, I’d hope we’re pretty close.”

Keith’s shoulders loosened and he sank back against the chair. He smiled softly at Lance. “Yeah, I know. And same, for me, I mean.”

Lance smiled, happy. “That’s good to hear, Mullet.” He leaned back into the pillows, picking up the salve and dabbing at his neck again. “Hunk’s already told me all the latest gossip.” He smirked, wiggling his eyebrows at Keith who groaned goodnaturedly. Keith smiled, but Lance could see the edges of it didn’t quite reach his eyes. Lance’s grin faded. He hummed, thinking for a moment, then put the medicine and towel down in his lap with a sigh.

“I really should apologize.” Keith blinked at him in confusion. “Pidge said I snapped at you when I was, you know.” Lance gestured vaguely, then continued. “Anyways, my mom would absolutely have my tail if she found out I’d hissed and snapped my teeth at a member of my pod. So, I guess it was good she wasn’t here to witness that.” His fins drooped. “Sorry about that.”

Keith hesitated, then placed his hand tentatively on Lance’s. “We know you miss your mom Lance. It’s okay to miss your family.” He squeezed Lance’s hand. Lance glanced gratefully at Keith with a watery smile. He sniffed and wiped at his eyes. “It was really scary seeing you like that Lance. It must have been even worse for you. Especially without your family here.”

Keith absentmindedly rubbed Lance’s knuckles as he croaked out a ‘Thank you.” and composed himself. Keith’s face twisted in confusion as Lance’s words flashed by him again. “Wait, pod? What does that mean?”

Lance laughed, eyes glossy with unshed tears. “It means I did have my family here.” Keith just blinked at Lance. “Pod is our term for ‘family group’.” He explained. Keith’s eyes widened in understanding, then his face split into a wide grin.

“You’re our family too, Lance.”

“Your space family, you mean.” Lance snickered and Keith rolled his eyes.

“Fine, I’ll humor you because you’re sick.”

Lance gasped, bringing Keith’s hand to his chest and clutching it between his own. Keith yelped as he was dragged forward at the sudden motion. “Babe. That’s more than even Pidge would do!”  He sniffed dramatically, “This is such a beautiful bonding moment.”

Keith flushed and huffed grumpily, tugging his hand away. “You’re never going to let that go, are you?”

“Nope!” Lance chirped happily. Keith smiled back, content.

Lance broke eye contact and cleared his throat. He picked up the cloth and grimaced before starting on his gills again. “I’m sorry you had to see me like that. From what Coran described, it couldn’t have been fun for any of you.”

Keith shuddered, closing his eyes. He didn’t think he’d ever get Lance’s screams out of his head completely. “Yeah. I just, I hated seeing you in so much pain.” Lance tensed but continued working, biting back the urge to hiss at the stinging in his gills as he listened to Keith. “I had no idea what was going on. I just knew that your legs were covered in blood from wounds you’d caused yourself , and you were convulsing and burning, just screaming .” Lance gently lifted a few fins from his tail and hesitantly brushed them against Keith’s leg.

“You seemed to be searching for something, too.” Lance cocked his head at Keith’s words. Keith looked embarrassed. “You made these sounds after you transformed, cries like I’d never heard before. It was like you were seeking us…” Keith gazed past him, eyes clouded and distant.

Lance’s face flamed, mortification burning in his gut. What?? He’d sought out Keith and the others like a, like a guppy! He made a silent pact as Keith shook himself and turned to Lance. His eldest brother was never allowed to know about this. “Sorry,” Lance whispered.

Keith shook his head, eyes clear once again. “It wasn’t your fault.” He leaned back, watching Lance’s ministrations in fascination, eyes tracking Lance’s claws as they deftly cleaned his gills. He glanced to the other side and frowned. “Um, Lance? I think you missed a spot, up near the back.”

Lance grunted, wincing as his claws scraped a particularly tender area. “Yeah, I can sort of feel it, but not well enough to find it without scratching myself.” He bit back a yelp and lowered his hands, panting. Keith rushed up to stand by him, hands reaching out then pulling back, then reaching out again, as if he wanted to help but was unsure what to do. He stood there, fidgeting and unsure.

Lance was exhausted. Forget what he said before, he just wanted this cleaning to be over already so he could sleep. But he still had the upper gills to do on both sides, and they were the most sensitive. Lance gazed forlornly at the medicine in his hands.

Keith’s hands twitched. “Maybe, I could point out the areas to you?” Surprise flickered in Lance’s eyes before he tilted his head, contemplating Keith’s suggestion. Keith pressed on, “Then you wouldn’t have to search the spots out with your claws so much. I could tell you where to put your hands, and maybe, that would help reduce the scratching?”

“Maybe, but…” Lance’s eyes flickered to the cloth, then to Keith, and away again. A rush of emotions swirled through his eyes. Keith could tell he was contemplating something important, but he had no idea what. So he just waited patiently for Lance to come to a decision. Lance sighed, murmuring, “I don’t know if I have the coordination to follow your instructions any better than my own senses. And it needs to be done.” Lance bit his lip. The indecision faded and he locked eyes with Keith, expression serious.

“Keith.” Keith straightened up. “Do you think, if I showed you how, “ Lance bit his lip, sighing deeply, “That you could do it for me?”

“What?”  Keith squeaked.  He wanted to help Lance, but what if he hurt him further?  Keith wasn’t exactly known for being gentle.

Lance grimaced, “Look, I don’t like people touching my gills. It’s, well, in my culture it’s a pretty big deal. A huge deal. It’s a serious sign of trust between pod members because our necks and gills are so vulnerable. That’s why Coran didn’t clean them. But, I really need this done, and I’m completely drained.” He lifted his head, and Keith froze, mesmerized by the sudden intensity of Lance’s gaze. “I trust you, Keith.”

Keith’s mouth dropped open and he felt his body go slack. He could feel tears prickling behind his eyes but he pushed them down, swallowing hard as he stepped forward. Gently, Keith took the salve and cloth from Lance’s hands. Lance turned to his side, hesitating for a split second before pulling his fins back and arching his neck so Keith could see the crusted film and the inflamed spots better. “Be careful.” He whispered softly.

Keith couldn’t bring himself to speak. He just moved into position and began tenderly wiping away the white flecks he could see in Lance’s gills. Lance flinched, tense, then relaxed by degrees as Keith continued his soft strokes. His nimble fingers made quick work of the first side, softly dabbing at the swelling areas and making sure the coating of the salve was thorough. When he was done Lance flipped over, now facing Keith; his eyes closed. Gingerly but quickly, he moved through the rest of Lance’s gills. He finished the top row then checked over the others, making sure Lance had gotten everything. When Keith was satisfied, he stepped back and began putting the medicine away. He disposed of the cloth then turned back around.

Lance was watching him, eyes shining. “Thank you.”

Keith’s heart swelled. He smiled, warm and soft as he returned to Lance’s side. “You’re welcome.”

Keith fidgeted again, hands twitching. Lance tilted his head curiously. “There was one other thing I wanted to talk to you about.” Lance nodded, gesturing for him to continue as he settled back into the blankets and pillows.

Keith sat down and bit his lip. Lance had trusted him, he could at least give him this in return. Keith straightened, hands pressed against his legs and locked his eyes on Lance. “I just wanted to let you know that the whole, “half-human thing”? I get it. I mean, it’s not the same. Our lives have been pretty different, and I’m not trying to say that I know exactly what you’ve been through. But, I understand the fear. The need to hide.” He bit his lip. “I’m here for you, Lance. If there’s ever anything you want to talk about. Your heritage, fitting in with people, maybe feeling, torn between two worlds.” He looked down at his shaking hands and clasped them tightly. “Or, if you just wanted to talk about your family, even. I’d love to hear more about them.” He felt a smile ghost across his lips, and Keith lifted his head to lock eyes with Lance, earnest. “I just, I need you to know that I’m here for you. That I care about you, Lance. You can come to me about anything, anytime.”

Lance was staring at him with wide eyes and mouth hanging open, tears rolling silently down his cheeks.

Keith began to panic. “Lance, are you okay? Did I say something wrong? What’s- Oof!” He was cut off as Lance reached out and yanked him out of the chair to sprawl over him on the bed. Lance gripped him hard, smiling so wide that his cheeks hurt. “You’re amazing. You know that, right?” His fins curled around Keith’s calves and his arms enveloped Keith, hugging him tightly against his chest.

Keith froze before collapsing into the hug. He pulled his legs up, shifting into a more comfortable position. Keith snaked his arms around Lance, clinging just as hard. “I’m glad you’re okay.” he whispered, pressing his face into Lance’s shoulder and melting into the embrace.

Lance grinned, burying his smile deeper into Keith’s hair. “Me too.”

**********

Lance absentmindedly hummed one of his mother’s favorite lullabies as he looked over his fins. He was giddy at the opportunity to be taking care of himself again. Lance had always prided himself on his impeccable fins and scales. His mamá had always said that their blue rivaled the depths of the ocean itself. He noted with some satisfaction that some of his natural fluorescent blue was starting to come back. The fins along his spine and on his head by his ears were trimmed of their worst bits, and despite the sickly white color, were well on their way to being fully healed. Lance preened at the sight. He was impressed. Coran really knew his stuff.

He looked up as the door opened for the third time that day, grinning. “Hey, fearless leader!  Welcome to my humble prison!”

Shiro smiled as he strode over to the tank. “Finally. Allura mentioned you were up. I’ve been trying to catch you awake for days now.”

Lance grinned. “Well, I’m a man in high demand, Shiro.” He winked, “But, it seems my receptionist has made an exception in my schedule.”

Shiro chuckled, “I don’t think Allura would be pleased to hear you call her that.”

Lance grimaced. “Yeah, okay, maybe don’t tell her I said that.”

Shiro laughed, leaning his arms on the edge of Lance’s tank. He smiled softly. “How are you feeling, buddy?”

Lance smiled up at his leader, “Much better! Coran says I’ll be fit to leave and stay in my own room in another day. Allura also said that I’ll probably be able to rejoin team training and bonding exercises by next week. Hmm, on second thought, I should tell her I’m still not feeling well. Might need more time to heal.”

Shiro snorted. “Sorry, Lance but I don’t think you’re getting out of training that easily.”

Lance shrugged, stretching his arms up and over his head, sighing deeply and contently at the sensation. “Dang.” He relaxed back down. “Guess it’s back to team bonding exercises and flying Blue for me.” He smiled wistfully. Lance had missed Blue a lot. She’d spoken with him a few times, but was mostly content to let him rest and be with his friends.

Shiro couldn’t help the guilt that tugged at his heart as he took in Lance’s longing expression and the faded color of his fins and scales. Despite a week of careful aid, they were still cracked and haggard in places. Lance always took such impeccable care of himself and now? If only he’d noticed something was different about Lance sooner and confronted him. They might have gotten him to open up about his heritage, and then they could have avoided this whole ordeal. Lance should never have suffered like that. Shiro should have- 

“Oh no, don’t you start too. I’ve already been through this with Coran and practically everyone else. Stop blaming yourself.” Lance fixed his hero and leader with a stern glare, hands on his hips.

Shiro spluttered, slipping slightly against the edges of the tank. He quickly righted himself. “What- what are you-?”

Lance sighed and fixed him with a pointed look. “Look Shiro, the blame game? I’m an expert. I always notice when you and Hunk and the others are starting on it. You do it more than anyone else.”

Shiro rubbed the back of his head, frowning. “I, I didn’t realize anyone-”

“Noticed?” Lance raised an eyebrow.  “Shiro we always notice. Because we care about you. So, please, don’t beat yourself up over it, okay?” He pleaded fervently, begging Shiro to understand what he was trying to say.

Shiro blinked at Lance a few times. A slow, soft smile spread over his face. He sighed warmly, reaching over to gently ruffle Lance’s hair. Shiro had been pretty tactile with Lance recently; ruffling his hair or knocking against his shoulder playfully after a good training session. He’d even given him a bear hug on occasion and put him and Keith in separate headlocks during more than one of their arguments. Honestly, Lance loved it, and he preened at the show of affection. Shiro reminded him so much of his older brothers. “I thought I was supposed to be the one comforting you,” Shiro chuckled.

“We’re taking turns.” Lance said matter-of-factly. “This hour is mine, and next can be yours. I think Hunk has booked the rest of the evening though, he likes to hog the worrying time. He can be pretty selfish like that, but we’re working on it.” He smirked.

Shiro leaned his head back and laughed heartily. “Okay, kiddo.” He cuffed the back of Lance’s head and Lance squawked, rubbing the spot indignantly. “We’ll try to do it your way.”

Lance grinned broadly. “Ooh, my way. I do like the sound of that. I should get sick more often.”

Shiro chuckled, “Don’t even think about it, Lance. You gave us quite the scare there.”

Shiro pulled himself up straight and drew his hands back to his sides. “There is something important I wanted to ask you about, though.”

Lance sighed. “Everyone wants to talk to me. It’s been one serious conversation after another.”

Shiro smiled sympathetically, “I know, buddy. It won’t take long. I wanted to know, is there anything you need from us?”

Lance blinked rapidly up at him. “Uhh...”

Shiro continued, “It’s just, this kind of thing is so dangerous. I don’t want to take the chance that anything like this could happen again in the future, not when we could prevent it. We could have prevented this if we’d just made the environment here at the castle safe for you.” Lance sat up abruptly, opening his mouth to counter, but Shiro lifted his hand, effectively cutting Lance off. “You didn’t feel safe enough to tell us about your heritage or your biology, Lance. That should never have happened. You should never have to feel afraid to be who you are, or to tell us anything. For that, I am deeply sorry.”

Lance squirmed, eyes dropping to where his hands lay clasped in his lap. “It’s not that I didn’t want to tell you guys. It’s just that- Shiro you saw how the Garrison treated you when you crashed landed back on Earth!” Lance stared imploringly at Shiro, voice urgent. “All my life I’ve been taught to hide it so that people who would- who would take us away or, or hurt us wouldn’t find out. Iverson was willing to sedate you and hold you captive, at least until he had all the information he wanted! Information you probably couldn’t have given him with your scrambled memory. And you were a decorated officer with high credentials, an impressive history with the Garrison, and fully human! Imagine… Imagine what they would have done to me. To my pod-”  Lance’s voice cracked and he wept.

Shiro’s chest ached at Lance’s words. Wide-eyed and speechless, he reached out a hand to Lance’s shoulder, steady and comforting.

He leaned into Shiro’s touch and took in a sharp breath, composing himself. “I know what they’d have done, Shiro.” He whispered. “I know what people do to us when they find out.”

Shiro’s brow furrowed, “What do you mean, Lance-”

“Lance!”

“Hooray, you’re awake! Allura and Coran said you would be!”

Lance flinched, fins flaring out and standing on end as the door swept open and the other paladins came trooping in, calling out to him. He shook his head, settling his fins and grinned back. Hunk skipped up to him, pulling him into a crushing hug. Lance’s breath whooshed out at Hunk’s tight grip. He laughed, squeezing back. Pidge and Keith trailed behind Hunk, smiling at him. Allura and Coran strolled up and stood next to Shiro.

“Apologies, Lance. But, once they all found out you were awake they ran here as fast as they could!” Coran beamed at Lance, hands clasped behind his back.

“Thanks, Coran.” He said sincerely, smiling up at the older altean from within Hunk’s embrace. He bit his lip and glanced up at Shiro out of the corner of his eye.

Shiro smiled kindly, “We can talk some other time if you want.”

Pidge’s leaned in, eyes flickering back and forth between them rapidly. “What do you mean?”

“Oh, were we interrupting something? Sorry, Shiro.” Hunk frowned slightly, pulling away from the hug.

Lance shook his head. “Nah, buddy. You weren’t interrupting anything. In fact, maybe it would be good for everyone to hear this. We could hold a Q&A Seminar.” He joked.

Keith shrugged and wandered away to pull some more chairs over. Hunk glanced between Shiro and Lance, then went to go help Keith. Allura and Coran looked confused. Allura leaned over, “What’s a Q&A Seminar?”

Pidge pushed her glasses up, “It stands for Question and Answer. Basically, we ask Lance any questions we still have, and he gives us an answer if he can.” She touched the rim of her glasses, leaning towards Lance curiously, “Though, what could have brought this on, I don’t know.”

Lance just smiled placatingly at her, something melancholy behind his eyes. “I’ll explain in a moment, Pidge.”

Lance waited until everyone had settled around him, then began. “So, I know you guys have a lot of questions, and I’ve already answered a lot.” He flashed a smirk in Pidge’s direction who just raised an eyebrow and shrugged. “But, I know a lot of you are wondering why I kept this” he gestured to himself, his long tail sparkling serenely in the overhead lights, “a secret.”

The other paladins leaned forward, varying degrees of curiosity on their faces.

“Well, a lot of it is obvious. Like I told Shiro before you all came in, if the Garrison had found out, we likely would have been taken and separated. They would have run experiments to figure out what exactly we were. Coming out as anything less than human, it would’ve just made them treat us like there was nothing human in us to begin with. We would be nothing more than animals, fascinating and unnatural creatures to them.” Keith shuddered, pulling his knees to his chest as Lance spoke. Shiro shot Keith a concerned look and placed a comforting hand on his knee.

“My parents were always careful when talking to us about our heritage. The two main family rules were ‘Never tell’, and ‘Never be seen’. We always took them to heart, especially my older siblings. They knew firsthand; I wasn’t old enough. They knew If we were ever found out… mom told us we could be taken away from the pod and-” Lance flinched, shuddering as he closed his eyes, knuckles white from where he was clenching his hands into tight fists. His tail curled up and his fins hardened, flaring around him protectively. Hunk leaned over the tank, gripping Lance’s hands in his own shaking ones, rubbing soothing circles against their backs, mindful of the claws. Pidge, Allura, and Coran all looked slightly sick. Lance took a deep, shuddering breath, “At best, we’d probably have been killed. At worst, they’d sell us, or, parts of us for profit.”

Shiro stilled, shoulders tensing, and hand gripping Keith’s knee tightly. Keith’s head shot up and he sucked in a sharp breath.

Lance shook violently, a couple of tears squeezing past his tightly shut eyes as he held onto Hunk’s hand like a lifeline. “Regrowing scales is a slow process. It’s messy, and painful. Losing one is difficult to do and excruciating. And people outside our pod touching our scales and fins is super taboo. To have them forcibly removed...” Lance choked back sobs, curling in on himself.

The tips of Lance’s fins flicked distressfully at the paladins, as if reaching and begging for them.  His pod all moved as one, knocking over chairs in their haste to surround Lance and bumping into each other. Soothing hands came down around Lance, shaking and kind. Shiro and Hunk leaned over and as one, lifted a hiccuping Lance out of the tank. Keith grabbed a blanket, soaking it in the water as they lowered Lance to the ground in their midst. He tossed the dripping blanket over Lance’s tail and they all curled up around him, pulling him tightly into their arms.

They murmured soothingly to him, cradling and touching every part of him that they could. Tender hands lay against his arms and rested on the blanket over his tail while fingers carded through his hair and stroked his fins. He was sandwiched between Hunk and Shiro, Allura and Coran at his back while Pidge and Keith curled up around him on either side in front.

“You don’t have to continue, Lance.” Allura’s eyes glazed with pain as she watched her weeping paladin.

He shook his head, breathing deeply to calm the sobs wracking his body.

Shiro frowned, concern emanating from him. “Lance, please it’s okay. I shouldn’t have brought this up, really, it’s okay if you don’t want to-”

Lance choked again, hiccuping laughter bubbling its way up alongside the sobs. “There you go again. Pl-playing that stupid self-blame game. I told you to kn-knock it o-off.”

Hunk chuckled wetly, pulling Lance more firmly against him. Shiro’s hand pressed harder against the back of his head, firm and steadying.

“I’m sorry. My maternal grandparents wouldn’t give me the exact details, but we all knew they had stories of friends and family members who’d… I just, I never even got to know her. I wasn’t even born yet when it happened; my mom was pregnant with me.”

The paladin’s stilled, and they felt their blood run cold. Keith shook, feeling as if ice had been dumped into his veins.

“What- what do you mean, Lance?” Allura asked tentatively.

Lance opened his eyes, slowly. They were glazed over as he stared unseeing past them.  “My pod was discovered just two months before I was born by a group of cuban fishermen. My immediate family was visiting my mom’s only sister and her family. A bunch of my aunts and uncles had gathered to celebrate the news that my mom was going to have another kid. But, one of my younger cousins swam away from the pod too far and was spotted. The men tried to catch her, and my family scattered. The adults and older siblings racing for the younglings as my aunt and her eldest children tried to get to Andrita in time. My cousins managed to get her free and escape, but, but my mom’s sister, her only sibling, they didn’t make it in time.” Lance was shaking and trembling, tail twisting and jerking against the ground with each convulsion. They pressed in further. Some of Lance’s fins reached out child-like fingers, shaking as they wrapped around random wrists, ankles, and limbs of his teammates, clinging desperately to them.

“Two of my uncles and a couple of cousins, led by my father, scoured the shores for the boat for a week. When they finally found it, they managed to sneak on board later that night to get her back, but those monsters had already taken most of her scales and all of her fins. Broken scales can scar over, but they bleed so much and require serious tending. She’d bled out before my father and the rest of the rescue party could get to her. The crew too busy celebrating their catch,” Lance spat, snarling and sharp teeth bared, “to care about the life their selfishness had just taken away from us.”

His fins flared out menacingly as he snarled, but as quickly as it had come, the fight drained back out of him. Lance drooped in their arms, hunched smaller and looking bone tired. They’d never seen him so subdued. It didn’t sit well with Keith or Shiro, seeing Lance like that. Shiro rested his head against Lance’s, tucking the young paladin under his chin and pulling him down to his chest, as if he could protect him from all the evils in their world. Keith just slid his hand down Lance’s arm to take his hand and intertwined their fingers, solid and comforting.

Lance let out a soft sigh. “The stress was too much for my mother. I was born two months premature and severely underweight. My pod spent every waking hour taking care of my mom and me, monitoring our hearts and blood pressure, terrified we’d end up ill.”

“I’m okay though,” He reassured the others. “No lasting health problems for either of us.”

Hunk enveloped every part of Lance that wasn’t already connected to another member of the team in a bruising hug. Pidge burrowed herself further into Lance. His fins flared and twitched slightly at the motion. Lance detangled his arm from where it was trapped between himself and Hunk and reached for her, stroking her hair; his eyes less distant.

“We’re not going to let anything happen to you, Lance.” She whispered, curling up in the crook of his tail.

Allura murmured in agreement, eyes a touch too bright as she stroked his head and fins, eliciting a warm hum from Lance at the motion. “I’m so sorry your family went through that, asteráki.”

“Yes, I am sorry for your loss.” Coran’s face pinched, eyes as glossy as the rest of the paladins.

Lance just lay still, eyes closed and holding on to the warm feeling of home and family that encompassed him. “It was a long time ago,” He whispered at last.

Keith hummed, “Just because it was a long time ago, doesn’t mean that it means nothing now. It’s okay to let your past hurt sometimes. Just know that there are always people you can go to when it hurts; people who love you and who are here for you.”

Lance laughed lightly, head still pressed between Hunk’s and Shiro’s chests. “That’s actually pretty good advice, Mullet. Looks like Shiro’s ‘wise space dad’ schtick is rubbing off on you. Before you know it, you’ll be just like him. Scary.” Lance laughed, wet but warm. “But, you know, the two of you could do with taking your own advice more often. We’re here for you too. I just, I wanted to tell you because I need you, all of you, to know that none of this is your fault. It was a crappy circumstance, but honestly? I’m grateful for how it turned out. I was scared, and I think I don’t know if I’ll ever overcome that fear completely. But I trust you all. I like our bonding moments; they’ve been nice.”

Shiro smiled softly down at Lance, squeezing him briefly. “We trust you too, Lance. Thank you. I think we could all do with some more bonding moments.”

Lance shifted, sitting up a little more and the others shifted with him, allowing him to move and stretch a little. “Maybe with less crying and trauma though. Preferably some fun ones in between the intense ones, okay? Like, we should take turns spilling our guts then holding these therapy sessions, ‘cause that’s probably good. Mamá always said not to bottle things up. But, intermixed with the fun. That’s important.”

Hunk chuckled, “Yeah, buddy. I second that. How about we start with family dinner. If Coran says you’re well enough to join us at the table, then we’ll head there. Otherwise, we can just hang out in the Medbay tonight.”

Lance rubbed his neck sheepishly, “I kind of want to stay in the water for a little longer, if that’s alright.” Allura and Coran exchanged looks behind him, their faces splitting into identical grins.

“Of course, Lance!” Allura cheered brightly. “In fact, Coran and I think we have a way of helping with that.”

Lance looped his arms over Shiro’s shoulders as he and Hunk bent to lift him back onto his bed in the tank. He squinted at her and Coran. “What do you mean?”

Coran rocked back and forth on his feet, wagging a finger at Lance, “Ahh, ahh, young paladin! You’ll just have to wait and see.”

Pidge jumped up and sped off. “I’ll go get the blankets and pillows so we can build a fort!”

Hunk grinned, “I’ll go prepare some food. I think I’ve got some good spices, so I could try to whip up some cuban dishes.”

Shiro smiled, “Why don’t we have a movie night? I’m sure Allura could find a way to project from Pidge’s laptop. If she’s anything like Matt, I know she’s got a few hundred movies downloaded on there from, umm, questionable sources.”

Lance snickered and Keith smirked. Allura and Coran just look confused, but intrigued. Lance sat back as they began questioning Shiro on what he meant by ‘questionable sources’ as well as asking about various Earth movies.

When Pidge and Hunk returned they all piled near Lance’s tank and settled down. Coran had managed to whip out a projector so they were able to display the movie on the wall across from them. Laughing, chatting, and eating Hunk’s food while Pidge and Lance threw popcorn at the villains, Lance couldn’t stop smiling. He missed his pod back on Earth, but his friends here; they were his family too. Lance’s heart swelled as he watched them, head leaning against Hunk’s arm as it draped lazily in the tank. He couldn’t wait to take them home to meet his family. Only when he had both of his families together again, would Lance feel completely at home. But for now?  He grinned. This, right here, was good.

**********

“You scared, Mullet?”

“I’m not scared!”

3-2-1Go !” Lance cackled as he shot away, fins and tail cutting seamlessly through the water.

“Hey!” Keith roared, taking off after him, surging through after Lance, powerful strokes propelling him quickly. He was no match for Lance, however. With a flick of his tail, Lance was long gone, flipping and twirling in the water as he raced Keith. Lance had goaded Keith into racing them immediately upon entering the pool area. Keith, never one to back down from Lance’s challenges, dove straight in, fiery and determined. So far, he’d lost all of them. Much to Keith’s rapidly growing impatience and Lance’s delight.

“C’mon, Keef.” Lance smirked as he flipped lazily around Keith in the middle of the pool. Keith had given up halfway through this time. He crossed his arms as he tread in the center, pouting petulantly. “It’s no fun if you don’t participate!” Lance smirked, not even bothering to contain his glee. He snickered, dodging languidly as Keith swiped at his fins.

“I’m done racing. It’s no fair with your tail.”

Shiro smirked, “I don’t know why you didn’t figure that out earlier.” He let out a booming laugh when Keith shot him a nasty glare. “Or, why you agreed in the first place!”

Lance just laughed at Keith’s disgruntled look and shot off, powerful strokes propelling him to leap in and out of the water like a dolphin, twisting and spinning gleefully as he went. The deep iridescent blue of his scales had all but returned, the range of hues in them slowly becoming more prominent than the gray and faded patches. Some of his fins were still haggard, and the worst bits had to be shaved off to let the new growth take over. However, their color had returned. See through and glimmering, but distinctly blue, like the range of the sky on a clear summer’s day from its horizon to its epicenter. Lance had a few more weeks of healing to go, but he was thrilled by the progress, treasuring the sensation of water running past his body at last.

“We should teach Allura and Coran water polo.” Pidge piped up from where she was dangling her legs in the water.

“I call Lance on my team!” Hunk yelled.

“No way, that’s cheating!” Keith cried.

“Yeah, Lance has to face Allura and all of us himself!”  Pidge crossed her arms, eyes glittering as she glared at Hunk.

“What? No fair, brothers stick together!”

“Aw, come one, Hunk! You know you want to see Lance take on Allura. Shiro, back me up here!”

Lance giggled as the paladins squabbled with each other, diving backwards beneath surface, and spinning with glee in the currents dancing and flashing alongside him. Giggles bubbled up around him as he danced about under the paladins’ feet. He grinned lazily, mind wandering as he lay back, staring up at the way the light bounced off of the surface of the pool and streamed through the water. He couldn’t believe that Allura and Coran had a pool he could use.

They’d spent the past week setting it up for him, changing things around according to suggestions from the other paladins while Lance continued to recuperate in his room. From what he’d heard from Hunk, the pool had actually been upside down on the ceiling of all places at one point. He was glad they’d finally worked out the gravity, though Coran complained endlessly about how odd Earthling customs and pools were.

Lance had known something was up as soon as he walked into the dining hall this morning. Hunk had been practically vibrating with excitement, biting his lip against a grin and glancing constantly at Lance. Pidge was no better, hiding a grin as she poked at her food. Keith and Shiro were discussing something with Allura. Coran had been nowhere to be seen. Lance managed to corner Hunk after breakfast and had almost wheedled answers out of his fidgeting best friend when Shiro caught him.

He was even more suspicious when the rest of the team trooped up behind Shiro, identical, highly suspicious grins on their faces. “Okay, what are you all up to,” He’d asked, squinting at them. Shiro had just grinned and announced that they were all going to change into some altean clothes Allura had found for them for a special bonding exercise. Lance raised an eyebrow, but followed Coran to his room. His suspicions had mounted when he realized there was just a pair of blue swimming trunks on his bed.

After Lance had changed, Coran had drug him to the elevator, and then to an area of the castle they’d never been in before. His jaw dropped when he saw the pool and the other paladins cheered, calling out ‘Surprise!’ and all dressed up in swim gear similar to his own. He’d burst into tears and thrown himself into their midst, then took off, slipping into the water and relishing the freedom that came with changing. He immediately began goading Keith into racing him. And that’s how they ended up here.

Lance chuckled as he watched Pidge float through the water with Hunk, splashing back and forth. He grinned, an idea forming and with a flick of his tail, dove deeper and snuck up under Pidge, tail flicking back and forth as he waited for the perfect moment.

Hunk backed away and Lance took his chance.

He shot upward, reaching his arms out and aiming directly for Pidge. His arms snagged her waist and she screamed, shooting up into the air with Lance holding her tight as his speed propelled them above the surface high enough that most of his tail was out of the water. “Deep breath!” Lance called and Pidge shrieked at him as they went barrelling deep beneath the surface, sucking in a breath just before her head hit the water.

Lance laughed heartily, rolling with her underwater, then flicked his tail, dragging both of them up to the surface. Pidge spluttered as they burst out, hair sticking haphazardly to her face and flailing. Lance chortled and she punched his arm, glaring daggers as she swept her hair out of her eyes. “Lance!”

Hunk was bent double, wheezing and clinging to the edge of the pool. Allura was desperately trying to school her expression into one of disapproval. Shiro pressed his fist into his mouth, but he couldn’t bite back the laughter that was bubbling out of him.

“What was that for, you jerk!”

Lance grinned and cooed at Pidge placatingly, earning more swipes. “Aw don’t be like that Pidgey. I just wanted to help you practice your flying.” He dissolved into snickers, swimming back out of her reach once she was calm enough to tread water on her own again.

“Then do it to Keith, not me!”

“Wait, what? No, don’t you dar- Lance!-” Keith screamed and kicked out as Lance charged him with a grin, lifting him high into the air and then dragging him back down under the water like he did with Pidge.

Shiro lost it and fell into the pool, laughing so hard he couldn’t breathe. Allura broke as soon as Shiro fell. Soon they were all in the pool, grinning as they watched Lance and Keith wrestle under the water. Hunk cheering on Lance while Pidge screamed for Keith to “Get that overblown guppy!”

Lance gasped indignantly as he grappled with Keith. “Just for that, you’re next, Pidgeon!” Pidge yelped and swam behind Hunk, using him as a shield as Lance creeped up on them, mimicking a hungry alligator, flicking his tail back and forth. Mischief glittered in Lance’s eyes as Hunk hauled Pidge up and away from him with a screech.

They spent the rest of the day playing in the pool. Lance grappled with his friends, pulling people underwater and racing them in both Mer and human form, declaring that he was going to prove to Keith that he could win without his tail (He did). He showed Pidge how his fins helped him swim faster and detect things that she hid in the water with the aid of her paladin armor for him to find. Shiro’s heart swelled as he watch Lance play. From Allura and Coran’s fond smiles, they felt the same. Lance grinned and waved at them from behind Keith before launching onto his back. Keith screeched, flailing in an undignified manner before angrily flipping a cackling Lance off him. It wasn’t Varadero Beach, but, Lance thought as he danced back and forth in the water with his new pod, maybe, this was still home too.

Notes:

I did a lot of research on illnesses that fish actually get, so all of the symptoms are combinations of things I found. My computer probably thinks I have some hideously sick fish by now.