Chapter Text
---------------------------Alphinaud---------------------------
Alphinaud sighed to himself, feeling the boredom bother him as a particularly annoying mosquito. It was a day off for the Scions in Rising Stone, so he had nothing to do. In the last few hours he had done all he could think to distract himself. He had finished reading that book he had found with some rather curious Arcanic Runes, had finished packing the paperwork he had worked the night before, and had trained with his Carbuncle.
"Well, I can clean Reiyo's room..." he murmured to himself. Alphinaud had spent the night in that bedroom, which Reiyo used mainly when he wanted to escape the house he shared with his twin sister, Reiko. In this house lived Reiyo, his sister’s husband Shiki, Reiko herself and Hiryu, a friend of the family. Reiyo said that sometimes her sister and Shiki were too... intimate with each other... which was why he had the room in Rising Stones. Alphinaud had a healthy respect and fear of Reiko, so he could fully understand.
Since Alphinaud had to stay up late dealing with paperwork, Reiyo had offered his room for Alphinaud to use to keep the young Elezen from going home too late. Alphinaud was grateful for that, too. He was very tired when he finished the paperwork, so having a place to just stop and sleep had been very enjoyable.
The boy walked to the bedroom, which was next to their little infirmary, and turned on the light. The room was mostly simple, had only a bed, desk and closet. The bed was unmade, and there were some papers and books thrown through the corners, Reiyo had always been kind of messy, after all. Alphinaud tidied up the bed and began to collect the papers from the floor when he noticed the book.
It was a greenish, small, nameless book. Curious, the young Elezen picked it up. Normally, Alphinaud would not touch other people's things, but since Reiyo had left there, knowing that Alphinaud would stay the night, it could not be very private, right? Besides, the curiosity of his nerdy side, as Alisaie liked to call, was gnawing at him from the inside. He opened the book and was surprised when he noticed that it was a handwriting.
Reiko suggested that I write this book. She said that if I could not tell anyone, maybe writing would help stop my panic attacks. While I doubt it, it does not cost anything to try, does it? Anyway, I'm going to write this book, then. "Reiyo's diary," if you want to call it that.
Was that... a diary? Alphinaud stopped reading, surprised. More than ever he knew he should drop the book and stop reading. This was a violation of privacy, Reiyo would be upset if he found that Alphinaud had read the diary. But Reiyo wrote about panic attacks , Alphinaud thought. Maybe if I find out what causes them, I can help him . He convinced himself and began to read again.
---------------------------Diary---------------------------
I think there's no better way to start than that day...
I was sitting with the other children from the camp in a semicircle, facing Ardgar. As it was a camp of Ala Mhigo refugees, I was pretty out of place there. My cat ears and tail were very different from them, everything in me screamed "foreign", but they had found me and cared for me (even though they often had complaints about what I was doing...), so I stayed with them at the time.
Of course, that day I was six years old, so I could not just walk around by myself. No, I was staying with the other children in the camp. There was Ailis, a girl with brown hair and hazel skin, and very pretty blue eyes, like the sky itself. She was nice to me, so I liked her. There was also Beacan, who was a short-haired boy, a year older than me at the time. He was blond, with dark skin and brown eyes. I did not like him, Beacan liked to make fun of me for being different from everyone.
Besides these two, I vaguely remember Norton, who was a lighter-skinned boy with reddish hair and almost yellow-toned eyes. He was quite quiet, so I can not remember him very well now. And there was Ethel, too, who was the daughter of the head of our camp. She was the eldest of the group, with light blond braided hair and dark skin. Ethel was very beautiful, but a bit snobby.
We were a group of five children in total and were taught by Ardgar. Ardgar was an adult Hyur, twenty-seven years old, cousin of Beacan. Tall, with blond hair, a little lighter than Beacan's, dark skin, and a little beard. Ardgar was a very good person to me, although at the time I thought he was very boring. He would not let me do anything, because I usually brought trouble and confusion wherever I went.
"Very well, pay attention!" Ardgar asked, and any conversation the children had had between them ceased. Ardgar was good with children, really. A great teacher. "As you know, today is our first lesson outside the camp. I'll show you which monsters you should always avoid, as well as poisonous plants that are dangerous. All the material you need to survive." Everyone seemed very excited about the idea of leaving the Camp. When we were six, we were not allowed to leave. Because it was dangerous. The elders told us that Brass Blades could attack us. At the time, I had no idea what a Brass Blade was, but I knew they were bad. Well, bad for me and for my fellow camp.
We got up, then, to begin this tour through the lands of Thanalan. I was going to be near Ailis so I could talk during our walk when Ardgar called me. "Reiyo! You stay by my side, you little pest. And you will not get out of my sight during the entire trip!" I was really angry about it. "Whyyyyyyyyyy? It’s not like I’m going to do something baad!" I complained, kicking the sand with irritation. Beacan laughed at that, and Ailis looked at me a little worried. Ethel and Norton were lost in their own conversation, holding each other's hands, not paying attention to my little tantrum.
"You know why!" Ardgar scolded, with a rather intimidating look. "The last time I left you alone, you lured a lot of Snapping Shrew into the middle of class!" I pouted for that. Snapping Shrew was a peaceful creature, I did not imagine that they would be angry if I tried to pet them. Of course, I would have known that if I had not ignored Ardgar's lectures when he was explaining. I gave an exaggeratedly loud sigh, crossing my arms to show all my irritation at the situation, when I was forced to walk in Ardgar's footsteps to avoid a scolding.
The trip was long. Our camp was near Sandgate on the Eastern Thanalan. Ardgar took us through Southern Thanalan, and we quickly crossed Broken Water. He was explaining that it was not very safe there, since there were very aggressive critters, from a beast tribe called Amalj'aa. In addition to Little Ala Mhigo where there were sometimes people who did not like refugees trying to live near Ul'dah.
Just before we reached Central Thanalan, Ardgar stopped us. "Children, do you see that?" He pointed to a creature that looked like a snake with legs. A Peiste. "These are called Sandskin Peiste. They have a dangerous attack that can paralyze you if you look when they are doing it,” he explained quietly. Alisis let out a whimper with the explanation, hiding a little behind me.
Ethel raised her hand to speak. "Mr. Ardgar, I'm hungry," she said. "We're already walking for hours ... When are we going to have lunch?" I looked up at the sky when she said it. The sun had already passed a little from its peak, it was probably a little after noon. I was also feeling a little hungry, but it was such a common feeling that I normally would not notice. Beacan complained according to Ethel, and Norton also nodded. I could see that Alisis agreed, but seemed afraid to say, that she was embarrassed, maybe.
"Hmmm... Well, it's about lunch time." Ardgar laughed. "I'm going to show you what to do when a Peiste is attacking you, and we can eat some Peiste's meat for lunch." It was a really good idea, since we only had one drop of water each (it was basic material of survival when you live in Thanalan, after all). Everyone seemed very excited about the idea of seeing Ardgar fighting, I included myself in that. It was rare to see something really interesting in a class after all.
Ardgar instructed us to remain silent, hiding next to some pebbles, and took a pair of knives from his pockets. Ardgar was good at keeping himself hidden, he seemed almost invisible as he approached the Peiste from behind and attacked. The knives seemed to make a good damage in the creature, because Ardgar was quite strong. The Peiste turned to him, hissing. A purplish eye appeared in front of the creature, and Ardgar turned quickly.
"He's going to get hit! Why does not he deviate? "Beacan complained, looking worried. "He already explained, idiot." Ethel glared at Beacan. "That's the magic of this creature. If he looks, he'll turn to stone. He just said that! "Beacan seemed ashamed to have forgotten, and I smiled, glad that for once it was not me taking scolding in class.
The attack did not hit Ardgar, which was good, because it would be difficult to explain to the camp elders why our teacher had turned into stone and eaten by Peiste. Ardgar rolled out of a Peiste attack, and attacked with his knives, right under the monster's belly!
Ardgar then proceeded to take the flesh of Peiste and put in the bag he was carrying. There was not much meat, though. The animal was mainly bones and skin. Fortunately, it was enough, since we were small and ate little. He then returned to pick us. There was some blood splashed on his head and some scratches and dirt on your clothes where he had rolled on the ground, but he seemed fine. "That's how you have to do if some creature attacks you with magic... That eye is magic, when you see it, turn your back on the monster. Peiste is not the only creature that does this, so always pay attention.” The explanation was mainly background noise, since the children were talking excitedly about the fight we had just witnessed.
"My cousin is the coolest," Beacan said, every few seconds. "Yeah, we heard, idiot." Ethel looked very angry with the blond boy. "Can you teach us how to do that?" Norton asked, who seemed interested in the knives. "You were not hurt, were you, teacher?" Alisis asked at the same time, looking worried. I wanted to talk too, but I realized there was nothing I could say. There was only this feeling of excitement and anxiety in my chest that I could not control. "That was so incredible," I finally exclaimed.
Ardgar seemed embarrassed by all the attention. "No, I'm fine, thank you, Alisis. And Norton, this is something that you're going to learn in a couple of years, you need physical strength, and you're still just little baby fat balls." He winked at us, and the children glared angry at the comment. "I'm not a baby," I decided to make it clear to Ardgar, because he was looking mostly at me when he said that.
"You are the baby class, Rei-Rei." Beacan took the opportunity to mock. I was the smallest of the group, yes, but it was because I was a Miqo'te, not a Hyur like them. I growled a little Beacan and kicked him in the shin for the comment. "Ouch!" Ardgar sighed, this kind of interaction was so common that he was probably finding it annoying. "Stop fighting boys." And ignored the chorus of "He started it!" Beacan and me said together.
"They're both idiots." Ethel decided, staring at us. "Don’t you think, Alisis?" Alisis blushed at the question. "Uh-huh, I think they should stop fighting..." It was my turn to turn red, I was always embarrassed when Alisis talked about me, no matter how small the comment. "Reiyo and Alisis, sitting in a tree..."Beacan could not finish singing, as Norton covered his mouth with his hand. "The more you tease, the more time we'll take to start lunch," he said, looking bored.
Norton was right, so both me and Beacan shut up. Ardgar watched the scene in exasperation. "Let's just get to Central Thanalan for lunch. It's a bit dangerous here to attract monsters,” he explained. We walked again, past the last mile before reaching Central Thanalan without much trouble except for my attempt to touch a Sabotender - a rather funny live cactus - which was quickly frustrated with Ardgar’s hand on my shirt.
The road seemed longer than usual, since we were hungry. Ardgar made us walk up to a straight space near the Sultantree - which was no surprise, a tree - and we began to prepare lunch. The fire was made with pieces of dry wood that we collected, and the fire quickly began to cook the meat we had caught. It was lucky that there was not a sandstorm in that part of the desert, food with sand was always unpleasant.
With a full belly, we continued our journey through Central Thanalan. A path full of Snapping Shrew and idiot Beacan jokes about the animals and the time I had unintentionally made them angry and attack us. "What is this great wall?" I asked, ignoring Beacan. "It's Ul'dah’s wall," Ardgar replied, staring at the wall. He seemed resentful when he did this. "It's the city-state of Thanalan."
We wanted to go in to see how it was there, but Ardgar strictly forbade us. He seemed so angry at this idea that we all put it aside. We then followed the train tracks, avoiding Brass Blades patrols along the way. And it was from there that everything started to go wrong.
Climbing Black Brush, we finally arrived a river that divided a city of the territory of Antling Soldiers. Giant and aggressive ants that could cut you in half with a bite. Ardgar explained that we should always keep our distance, so we sneaked along the edge of the cliffs that would lead to the lake. We should not have gotten so close, but maybe it was the fate that made it happen.
Beacan had come too close to one of the edges so he could see the frogs down there; Toxic Toads, as Ardgar explained, when the ground beneath his feet gave way. Three things happened almost simultaneously. Beacan slipped and fell into the water, Alisis screamed and Ardgar released my shirt, which he had come holding to prevent me from approaching the aggressive monsters.
Everything seemed in slow motion. Everyone was deadly pale, because everyone knew: If you were caught by the Toxic Toad's tongue, death was almost certain. Ardgar was frozen in place. I'd imagine the idea of losing his cousin probably had scared him too much so he couldn’t move.
One of the toads noticed Beacan. It started to approach, its tongue licking its face. At that time, I'm not sure what got into me. I could only think that I could not let Beacan be killed. Ardgar would be devastated. Beacan had parents to return, he needed to live.
So I did the dumbest thing of my life until then. I took a stone on the floor, the stone was small, it fit in my closed hand, and I jumped. The height was not too big, it should not be more than 19 feet. Maybe it was a Miqo'te’s thing, but heights had never been a problem to me, so I landed in the water beside Beacan without much difficulty.
Feeling the water on my ankles, and hearing the heartbeat of my heart rumble in my ears, I squeezed the stone in my hand and threw it straight into the eye of the toad. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Ardgar rushing down to reach us, but he would not have time. I knew it. Ardgar needed time, and I could give it to him with a distraction.
Now, writing in this notebook makes it look like I had a plan, but actually, at that time I was mostly scared. I did not want to die either, but thinking was difficult. I acted mainly on instinct. Stupid, yes, but, well, I've always been a little stupid.
I had no weapons, the stone had caught the frog's attention, but it would not be enough. I needed to keep the toad away from Beacan so Ardgar could save him. So I did the only thing I could; I screamed. "Hey! On here! Stinky toad, I'm here!" My voice echoed loud enough to disturb the beast. So I ran. I felt his tongue scrape weakly against my tail, and I accelerated. I was running faster than I had ever run. My breath was panting, my lungs ached and my throat burned with the effort, but I could not stop if I stop, would be caught. And if I was caught, well, goodbye Reiyo, right?
But I could not run forever, I stopped when I got to the wall on the far side of the lake. My clothes were soaked and my hair dripping from the water that had splashed on me. I turned and watched the toad approach. I closed my eyes, clenching my hands into fists, already sure I was going to die. Is this how it ends? That's what I thought.
It was then that I heard a sharp, loud sound. I opened my eyes, in time to see a glow strike the toad in the face. A man came running and stood in front of me, he had heavy armor, with a cloak, a sword, and a shield. My eyes widened in surprise. "You better get out of there if you do not want to become toad's dinner, you little brat!" He said. His voice was hoarse, from an adult. Older than Ardgar, even. Trembling, I obeyed. I ran to the nearest exit of the lake, where Ardgar was coming running, followed by the children, including a very wet Beacan. I relaxed when I saw that he was alive, which was good, because it meant that I had managed to help. Well, more or less.
I turned to watch the fight, barely feeling Ardgar's hand on my shoulder as he pulled me to see if I was okay. My eyes were glued to the fight, and I watched the man who had saved me fight the Toxic Toad. He seemed to dance around with that sword, cutting, deflecting and cutting again. There was a turn, then a thrust and the toad was dead. Simple like that.
Ardgar scolded me that day because I put myself in danger, but I can not remember what he said. I remember his pale face and Alisis's face. Even Ethel and Norton looked worried, and Beacan was in shock. The man who saved me came in, interfering with the scolding. "That was very brave, brat. I have to admit. But try not to let that courage kill you. A dead man can not save people, you know? "The man ruffled my hair and left, moving away quickly, without saying goodbye.
I turned to Ardgar, wide-eyed, half amazed when fear began to disappear now that I was safe. "How did he do that? It came with a zuuuum glow! So bam! He hit the toads, and cut with shuuush, as if it were nothing! "My explanation was not the best, but the other children seemed to agree (except Beacan, he still seemed in shock with his near-death experience) then Ardgar sighed, watching us. "He was an Adventurer," he explained. "Adventurers walk around, doing jobs for cash. Some are very strong because they need to kill many creatures to survive. Others, well, die trying. "
I could never be an adventurer. I had no money to start, or a gun, or previous training. But the idea of being free, going around and making money was very exciting for me when I was six years old. I spent several nights thinking of plans to become an adventurer when I grew up. I wanted to get money from it to get the people who raised me away from misery. And the first step to that, it was... getting stronger.
---------------------------Alphinaud ---------------------------
Alphinaud stopped reading there, smiling to himself. "Is that how you started, Reiyo?" It was really the kind of thing he would do. Alphinaud could see a small Miqo'te running to save someone with no plans or strength for it. Young Elezen felt guilty for reading it, but he put the diary in his own bag anyway. He hoped that the Warrior of Light would not notice the absence of the book. Alphinaud knew that Reiyo would not sleep in Rising Stones for a while (Reiko was traveling to Kugane with her husband, after all), so it should be safe.
And Alphinaud was dying with curiosity.