Chapter Text
Carl stopped speaking to his family long ago, his eye closed and body still, aside from the shaking. He’d said his goodbyes, gave his dad and Michonne their letters and the one for Judith too, made them promise they wouldn’t let her forget about him. He’d told them he wasn’t scared, that he was at peace with this, that he was ready. Michonne had to walk away for a minute, to cry on her own where Carl wouldn’t see. When she came back, Carl told her he loved her, said the same to his dad, and closed his eye. If it weren’t for the shaking, the sweating, the twitching, they would’ve thought he was gone. Siddiq left, moved to a different part of the tunnel, leaving the family to be alone with their dying boy.
It feels like an eternity of waiting has passed when Carl’s lips start to move again.
He’s muttering something, Rick and Michonne can’t quite make sense of it. They know this is almost the end, that his head is already someplace else, just waiting for his body to catch up. A few words are coherent and Carl repeats them often; mom, sorry, right, no. Everything else is just noise, quiet vibrations that mean nothing to everyone but Carl.
When his eye slowly peels open, it’s glazed over, unfocused, looking at Rick but not really seeing him. Carl’s head rolls to the side, his clouded gaze landing on the metal sewer wall beside him.
“Asshole,” he mumbles, a little louder than before. Somehow, his lips form an open-mouthed smile, and a dry croaking sound falls from it, the closest thing to a laugh he can manage.
Rick squeezes Carl’s burning hand, trying to pull his attention back to real life. “Who are you talking to, Carl?”
It’s futile. Another wheezing laugh forces its way out of Carl’s chest. “You happened to my eye,” he mutters, raising his free hand and dropping it down in the space next to him. His fingers weakly curl around nothing, clutching on to stale air. “You shot it.”
Rick and Michonne share a glance. They knew this was coming, the delirium, it’s what the fever did. Rick had wondered if Carl was going to talk to the people they’d lost, his mom, Shane, Glenn.. Ron hadn’t even crossed Rick’s mind. He knew the two had been close, always suspected it was more than friendship, but with what Ron put him through.. Rick couldn’t believe he was the one Carl was seeing in death.
Carl breathes out a quiet ‘yes’, his voice breaking. The rise and fall of his chest is becoming harsh, his body stuttering with each inhale.
There’s a moment of silence. Carl turns his head forward again, eye meeting with his dad’s once more before it falls shut. Rick focuses on his torso, reminds himself that his son is still breathing.
“‘s not,” Carl rasps, fingers on both of his hands flexing, likely trying to squeeze but not having enough strength. “Nowhere else, all gone.”
“He’s going,” Michonne whispers, resting a hand on Carl’s knee, “I feel it.”
Rick nods, feels the tears falling down his cheeks before he realizes he’s crying. “I know.”
“Okay,” Carl mumbles, his eyelid slowly rising, eye meeting his dad’s again. “I’ll see you,” he breathes, then closes his eye once more.