Archive of Our Own

Seongwoo would like to think that he’s a normal, twenty year old whose lucky stars lined up well enough that he was able to afford a decent apartment with even more decent friends.

A twenty year old whose lucky stars could apparently only do so much, which meant he was, unfortunately, a year behind graduation schedule. (Fuck indecisiveness and his impulse decision to change his major three semesters into college.)

A twenty year old who was comfortable enough with himself and his skin that even he surprised himself sometimes with his confidence.

It had taken many, many years of figuring out shit that he had wished he had found out earlier in life and a countless amount of mistakes and experiences to lead him to where he was at present.

And right now, at present was him laying on a couch that Jisung had saved from the landfill just minutes before its descent into a dumpster. (“It was free! And if you complain one more time about the stains, you’re free to sit on the floor!”)

At present, it was an unusually quiet evening in the apartment.

Which was rare in a residence that contained four college boys and one alumnus, a place that was expected to have a minimum of seventy decibels more often than not.

So the silence that reached Seongwoo’s ears was a wonderful, uncommon blessing. The sun was already so low in the sky that calling it night time wouldn't have been questioned, which meant that the living room was a comfortable dim.

Seongwoo let out a content sigh as he settled deeper into his spot on the left end of the couch, making sure to not stretch out too far. The darkest of stains resided on the right side and even in Seongwoo’s lazy bliss, his subconscious mind was always aware of where his limbs fell on this couch.

It was a perfectly drowsy moment, one that Seongwoo had just properly settled into when the flick of the overhead light turning on broke the spell of sleep Seongwoo was falling under.

“Oh shit, sorry. Didn’t realize you were there,” said Daniel, hand still hovering over the light switch when Seongwoo glared at him through groggy eyelids over the back of the couch.

“Nah, it’s all good,” said Seongwoo when his mind had finally returned from its haze, “I’d regret actually falling asleep on this thing if I did. So thanks for the save, I guess,” dismissed Seongwoo as he sat up. He reached up so he could fluff out the hair that was sticking to the back of his head.

Seongwoo hadn’t realized that Daniel had made his way around the couch until he felt a soft grip pulling his hand away from his head, only to be replaced with Daniel’s own hand sliding through his hair.

Surprised, Seongwoo looked up to a grinning Daniel, who allowed his fingers to glide a few extra times through Seongwoo’s hair before retreating in a slow manner, grazing his cheek on the pullback.

“Much better,” confirmed Daniel before walking to the kitchen to hang his backpack on one of their many mismatched dining room chairs to then open the refrigerator. The glow from the light inside illuminated Daniel’s face in an iridescent fashion.

Seongwoo let out a deep sigh before once again form fitting himself into the couch, but this time he made sure his newly fixed hair stayed unruffled.

Seongwoo had reached a level of confidence and understanding about himself that he was self assured in who he was and what he was about.

But that, whatever that was, hadn’t exactly made him feel something completely foreign, but it definitely was strange enough to really get his heart pounding.

---♡---

Seongwoo also liked to think his beautiful mother hadn’t raised an idiot.

While things like emotions and sways of the heart weren’t exactly his expertise, he could at least identify a courting ritual when he saw one.

But the fact that one was being performed on him, from Daniel no less, really made Seongwoo doubt his insight into what really was going on.

Almost like the light switch that Daniel had turned on the night all this had started, Daniel himself had flipped a switch in how he approached and interacted with Seongwoo.

Before, they were just close roommates. Bros who had hit it off inexplicably well under the circumstances of, “Yes, hello, this is our first time meeting but we both seem to know Jisung and both need a residence close enough to our college, so we will be living together from now on, let’s hope we don’t piss each other off.”

Seongwoo had already been living under Jisung’s roof for a year when Daniel had suddenly appeared, knocking on the front door only a week before the new semester was due to start, wearing a kind smile and three different backpacks. Seongwoo soon learned that Daniel and Jisung were apparently childhood friends whose parents still stayed in close contact. So in came Daniel, an unexpected fifth addition to their living situation.

The only thing that Seongwoo could have possibly complained about in the beginning was the fact that he now needed to share a room with Jaehwan, but honestly, that wasn’t all that horrible and not really Daniel’s fault at a behavioral level. Having a fifth roommate had actually turned into a welcomed idea since it wasn’t like they didn’t have the space and it really did help all their poor, nearly empty wallets.

So, scratch that. The only thing Seongwoo could have possibly complained about was the fact that he almost instantly had heart eyes for their new—most definitely straight—roommate.

Seongwoo knew he was in trouble when their new roommate was exactly his type. A sweet smile, an easy going attitude and a body that looked like it could toss him across the room if he asked. The perfect trifecta.

But Seongwoo really knew he was screwed when he told a terrible joke and Daniel had been the only one to laugh. He quickly came to learn that Daniel laughed at almost all his jokes.

They were practically a match made in heaven. Seongwoo loved to make people laugh and Daniel loved to laugh. Seongwoo could already hear the angels singing.

Well, except for the fact that Daniel was Super Obviously Straight. That was the part Seongwoo could complain about.

At the three month mark of Daniel having moved in, Seongwoo arrived at the sad reality that was him needing to beat his crush down to submission. That sad reality came in the form of Daniel arriving back home with a girlfriend in tow.

Which meant his suspicions had been correct. That Daniel was—regretfully—the apartments Token Straight Member. Seongwoo knew he was looking for heartbreak if he didn’t just forget about his stupid crush.

So as the years rolled by, Seongwoo had found a good, friendly relationship with Daniel. Their humor was usually on track with each other and they were able to bounce conversation between them comfortably and enjoyably.

But now, after years of strictly platonic friendship, Seongwoo found himself at the end of a relationship dynamic that was quite new for their friendship.

Suddenly, Daniel’s handwriting on his notes was neat enough for Seongwoo to read, to which Daniel had offered to Seongwoo after the first few times he had complained that their Political Science teacher “Changed the slides way to fast!” and “It’s practically a crime for professors to not post their lectures online!”

Suddenly, Daniel was insisting that he pick up both their tabs when they ate lunch at the on campus coffee house that they would frequent when both their schedules were free to do so.

Suddenly, Daniel was acting almost too much like perfect boyfriend material for Seongwoo’s poor bisexual heart.

Daniel’s new mannerisms towards him were soft, not in his face, enough for Seongwoo to convince himself that no, Daniel wasn’t actually trying to woo him with all these nice gestures.

Which meant that Seongwoo was really teetering towards the, ‘He Just Feels More Comfortable Around You’ side of the ‘What Is His Trying To Pull Here?’ meter.

But if Daniel was actually trying to woo Seongwoo...

That meant that Daniel was equally as smooth as he was cunning.

Which would really add to Daniel’s hotness meter if he was. (Something that really didn't need a boost, but honestly, there’s never a limit when if it comes to someone's hotness meter in Seongwoo’s book.)

But when Seongwoo looked at that sweet, actually pretty dorky, smile over a bowl of cereal on a lazy Sunday morning, he convinced himself that no, Daniel really didn’t have it in him to be pulling the moves on him and that it was stupid for him to even entertain the thought.

But damn, all the sweet gestures Daniel was doing really wasn’t helping his poor bisexual heart, let alone his long forgotten crush.

---♡---

Seongwoo was standing in the entryway of the apartment, struggling to get his jacket on. He could have sworn that the hundreds of times he’d done this before that his arm hole wasn’t at that strange of an angle.

But here he was, hand just barely able to reach his other sleeve and he just couldn’t get his fingers to uncatch so that he could properly get his jacket on.

Just when Seongwoo was about to just give up on the damn thing, maybe even start all over from the beginning, there was a small tug on the jacket and then it was miraculously getting pulled up to properly sit on his shoulders.

“There you go,” said Daniel from just behind Seongwoo. He could feel Daniel smooth out the fabric across his shoulders, then a small pat when he was satisfied with his handiwork.

“Awe, thanks, dude. That was really getting out of hand.” Seongwoo smiled knowingly at his pun as he wiggled his fingers up towards Daniel. A light laugh from Daniel and Seongwoo’s smile grew just a tad bit wider.

“My pleasure.” One last pat was placed on Seongwoo’s shoulder before Daniel passed by him and out the front door of their apartment.

Seongwoo thumped his chest a few times when Daniel was out of sight, reminding his pounding heart not to get too caught up.

He tried to remind himself that Daniel was just being kind, don't read too much into it.

Seongwoo didn't want to admit it, but his crush on the hot straight guy in the apartment was starting to flare back up with a vengeance.

---♡---

“Would you like some cream?”

“Of course I do,” said Seongwoo as he made grabby hands at the bowl of colorful creamers that was just out of reach on the other side of their table.

Without replying, Daniel easily reached over to the bowl and plucked out a blue one (French Vanilla, the only creamer Seongwoo deemed worthy of his taste buds) before peeling the foil top off so he could pour the liquid into Seongwoo’s coffee himself.

“One more please,” said Seongwoo as he grabbed his spoon to thoroughly mix his coffee. Daniel easily complied.

Sungwoon’s smile from the other side of the booth was unsettling.

But it was Jisung who spoke up first from his spot at Sungwoon’s side.

“What’s with this atmosphere? I almost feel like I’m watching a scene from a drama unfold right in front of me.”

Seongwoo scowled now that he realized that Sungwoon’s smile was actually a shit eating grin.

Daniel laughed, a pleasing sound to Seongwoo’s ears.

“Something out of a drama, you say?” asked Daniel as he calmly stacked the two emptied creamer cups together before neatly putting them to the side.

“Yeah,” chimed in Seongwoo, “what do you mean by that? He was just helping me out.”

Jisung’s expression clearly stated what he thought of Daniel ‘just helping out’.

Which was very close to where Sungwoon apparently stood, because he still had his stupid grin on his face, but was now looking down into his water glass in a poor attempt to hide it.

---♡---

Seongwoo was perched on his usual left side of the couch, busy killing time on his phone. It was a perfectly good Saturday night and Seongwoo was waiting for a confirmation text from one of his theater buddies on if tonight’s plans were actually a go or not. He was ready and prepared to leave, his nice jeans already adorning his legs, so there really wasn’t anymore he could do besides loiter until the text came through.

Jisung was sitting on the right side of the couch, back leaned up against the armrest with his legs stretched out onto the rest of the couch space, laptop perched precariously on his lap. (Jisung was one of two boys who lived here that was actually brave enough to sit there.)

The room was quiet, only the sound of Jisung clicking away on his keyboard filled the room until a door closing in the hallway broke the monotony. Daniel seemed to be taking advantage of the perfectly fine Saturday night to also go out by the looks of it.

Daniel was adjusting a well fitted jacket over his shoulders when Seongwoo glanced up from his phone. Daniel's hair was styled up from his forehead in a beautifully tousled yet swept way, a wonderful but rare sight on a normally casual Daniel. Made Seongwoo wish that he could see it more often.

The two made eye contact and didn’t break it even when Daniel made a beeline over to him. Without words, Daniel leaned down a bit, his hand raising to Seongwoo’s face. Instinctively, Seongwoo closed his eyes.

Seongwoo then felt a finger glide over his cheekbone a few times. He blinked open his eyes when he felt Daniel pull back, trying his damn hardest not to show that the light touch had caused a trail of goosebumps to rise along his neck.

Daniel smiled before presenting his hand. On the tip of his finger sat a dark eyelash, a reward for his efforts.

“Thanks,” said Seongwoo, feeling a bit lost for words.

Daniel smiled before lifting his finger up to blow the eyelash off, never once breaking eye contact.

“No worries, I got you,” replied Daniel casually before returning to his trek out of the house, only pausing once in front of the door to pull on some shoes.

A departing, “See you guys later,” then he was gone.

Seongwoo realized that he hadn’t looked away until he could no longer see Daniel.

Almost instinctively, Seongwoo looked to his company, already knowing that there was something to be said.

Seongwoo was greeted to the sight of Jisung’s eyebrow rising from just above the top of his laptop.

Well, if Jisung thought that was any sort of talent, he was sorely mistaken since Seongwoo can and did raise his own eyebrow right back at him.

Jisung’s second eyebrow rose to accompany the first one in reply.

“What?” finally asked Seongwoo, having grown tired of their nonverbal conversation.

Jisung’s eyebrows lowered to their normal position when he cast his attention back to his computer screen.

“Nothing,” said Jisung in a tone that blatantly meant something much more than his simple ‘nothing’.

“Just say it already, you’ve been giving me this look for the last month and it’s really starting to get to me.” Seongwoo usually wasn’t the type to be confrontational with his friends. If anything, he liked and preferred when the atmosphere was light and easy. But there was only so many times he could be on the receiving end of one of Jisung’s ‘sceptical yet knowing’ looks.

“It’s just,” Jisung paused to lower his laptop screen a bit so his face was no longer obscured, “I think it’s interesting.”

Seongwoo licked his lips, slightly irritated. “What’s interesting?”

In lieu of a proper, direct answer, Jisung changed the direction of the conversation.

“I’ve known Daniel for quite some time, as you know.” A deep nod from Seongwoo was his only response, trying to move Jisung along. “Which means I know quite a bit about him too. I’ve seen him skip school, I was there when he ran away from home, which was straight to my house, the little brat.”

“And? ” cut in Seongwoo when it was obvious that Jisung’s tangent was really veering off course.

“And,” stressed back Jisung, “I’ve been there for every single one of his relationships.”

Jisung’s tone signaled that he had finally made it to his point, but Seongwoo had apparently missed it.

“Okay?” said Seongwoo, now a weird mixture of affronted and curious.

“So what I’m saying is that I think it’s interesting. The way Daniel is treating you.”

“What do you mean?” asked Seongwoo, attention properly peaked.

“It’s just, Daniel has this thing he does. Where he likes to take care of the people he likes. And lately, he’s been taking care of you. ”

“Dude, Daniel’s straight,” said Seongwoo, a knee jerk reaction. Jisung’s face contorted into a sour expression.

“Right?” asked Seongwoo, sounding a lot more unsure of himself then his last statement.

“I don’t actually know Daniel’s orientation, but it definitely isn’t straight,” said Jisung like the notion was impossible to fathom. “I have no idea where you even got that idea from,” muttered Jisung.

“So, What you're trying to say is that Daniel wants to date me?” asked Seongwoo, finally jumping to the conclusion he thought Jisung was trying to get at.

At Seongwoo’s words, Jisung seemed to take a mental step back, like he had just realized what he had been insinuating.

“I guess—well—maybe,” says Jisung, tone unsure, “I can’t say for sure, but maybe he’s starting to like you. I don’t know why else he would be treating you like this.”

Seongwoo felt his phone vibrate in his hands and a quick glance showed that Seongwoo’s night out was a go. With that, he rose from his spot, but not without Jisung’s gaze following him.

“What are you going to do?” asked Jisung from his side of the couch when he realized that the conversation was coming to a close soon.

He was obviously looking for a response, but Seongwoo was pretty sure he didn’t have one to give.

It was a strange feeling, to find out that his mental turmoil hadn’t all been for nothing. That his observations towards Daniel’s behavior hadn’t just been his mind magnifying something that wasn’t actually there.

And to have Jisung of all people confirm it. Well, it basically meant it was fact, that Daniel’s actions might have actually been him trying to woo Seongwoo since Jisung was basically a Daniel expert.

So no, Seongwoo realized he didn’t have a response, at least not yet. He had never allowed himself to even believe once that he had a chance with Daniel, always ripping up his growing feeling before they had time to make roots.

Really, he hadn’t even considered the idea of Daniel liking him at some point before the night this all started, since Seongwoo tried to make it a habit to not try and date straight guys.

But now, apparently, Daniel wasn’t as straight as Seongwoo knew him to be and Jisung was still waiting for a response.

“I dunno, man. Maybe you’re reading into it too much?” said Seongwoo casually as he pocketed his phone, already swinging his way around the couch and towards the front door.

Seongwoo shut the front door on Jisung’s indigent cry of, “You can’t get out of this that easily! I know where you sleep!”

Seongwoo wasn’t quite sure what to do with this information just yet, but he was sure he could figure something out.

---♡---

Two days after Seongwoo’s talk with Jisung, Seongwoo was still stuck on what he was going to do with the Daniel situation.

Two days of thinking over Jisung’s question. What was Seongwoo going to do now that he knew Daniel’s intentions?

But when Seongwoo walked into the kitchen to the sight of Daniel reaching up to put some cups away on the highest shelf, he thinks he finally figured it out.

Putting all the dishes on the highest shelf had honestly just been a joke that Seongwoo had started and had somehow wrangled Daniel into continuing when Sungwoon had made a fuss about how Sungwoo never did the dishes. So Seongwoo started to put them up there out of spite but managed to play it off as a joke.

To see Daniel still committing to the joke even when he really didn’t need to be getting on Sungwoon’s bad side might have been the tipping point in some strange, deeply subconscious way.

But it might have also been the fact that just seeing Daniel almost on his tiptoes, shirt riding up ever so slightly as he reached to the far back of the cupboard got Seongwoo feeling some sort of way.

Seongwoo really couldn't say for sure.

Whatever it was, Seongwoo had figured out what he was going to do now.

And it was to play along with Daniel’s game. Seongwoo didn’t know the rules and hadn’t even been aware that there was a game to play until two days ago, but that didn’t matter. This was now a game that Seongwoo was an active player in. He figured he could always just add some rules when he wanted to if need be.

So when there was only one cup left on the drying rack, Seongwoo quietly went to grab it before stepping up behind an unassuming Daniel.

Lightly, Seongwoo placed a hand on the small of Daniel’s back (to balance himself, of course) as he reached up with his left to put the last cup away. The position was really over the top, pretty unnecessary, and far too close to Daniel’s back. Seongwoo mentally patted himself on the back for a turn well played.

Seongwoo felt Daniel tense up in front of him. It really was an interesting, kind of empowering feeling to crowd Daniel up against the counter.

Daniel only had a centimeter on Seongwoo, but sometimes it felt like more due to the fact that Daniel’s shoulders were nothing to sneeze at.

“There you go,” said Seongwoo, excruciatingly aware of how close he said it to Daniel’s ear.

Seongwoo felt his chest bump with Daniel’s shoulder blade when he leaned a little bit too close so he could slide his cup a little further in.

Daniel’s hand was still clasped around his own cup up on the shelf when Seongwoo finally retreated his hand.

With a bite to his lip, Seongwoo stepped out of Daniel’s personal bubble. When Daniel turned, Seongwoo was already looking away, trying to make it look like he was looking for more dishes to put away.

Seongwoo was biting his cheek, trying to keep his grin off his face when he feels a punch to his shoulder.

“Dude, what was that?”

Seongwoo looked, all the while rubbing at his shoulder, to see no trace of the frozen up Daniel. Now, he had amusement in his eyes, an almost unbelieving smile on his lips.

Seongwoo just shrugged. Nonchalant was the name, playing it cool was the game. “Just helping a bro out, what did it look like?”

Daniel just laughed while shaking his head, clearly amused by Seongwoo’s answer.

---♡---

It’d been a week since Seongwoo started to play the game.

Which, surprisingly, wasn’t that much of a change in their usual routine. They still ate lunch together more often than not and still filled their afternoons with either senseless video games or more sensible study sessions.

The only difference was that nonchalant flirting were now added here and there. You know, just this and that. A push and pull between the boys. Nothing too heavy or damning, but it had still been fun.

Flirting with Daniel was fun.

---♡---

“Seongwoo!”

Said Seongwoo looked up, Daniel mirroring the action from his side of the table.

Today, Seongwoo and Daniel had made their way to a study table in the library. They usually just took their study sessions home, since it was a ritual usually done in their pajamas, but Daniel needed a reference book for a paper and Seongwoo had ended up just setting up base there while he waited.

When Seongwoo finally saw who had called for him, he realized that he vaguely recognized the girl. A name for the face wasn’t coming to him, but he couldn’t help but assume that he must have at least shared a class with the girl.

His suspicions were confirmed when she finally made it to their table.

“Hey, do you happen to have your notes from class this morning? I was running late and accidentally missed.”

The girl was pretty, her teeth straight and hair well kept. Seongwoo felt kind of bad for not remembering what class they apparently shared together, let alone her name.

Seongwoo twirled his pencil around his fingers nervously. “Uhm, would you mind reminding me which class that is?”

She seemed taken aback, but not offended. “Oh, no worries. The class is big, I get it. We have chemistry together,” reminded the girl.

Seongwoo kind of wanted to ask for her name too, but instead just turned to start rummaging around in his stuff. He must have at least talked to her once before if she knew his name.

“Oh, yeah, definitely. I once missed one of Professor Kim’s classes in, like, the second week of school and that had been a nightmare trying to catch back up,” rambled Seongwoo as he pulled his backpack up from the floor so he could check in there.

The girl laughed. Seongwoo didn’t think what he said was all that funny but he appreciated her effort.

The air fell silent, the only sound coming from Seongwoo rustling around a bunch of crumpled papers. Seongwoo took a quick glance up to see what Daniel had been doing during all this to see him staring at the girl strangely. She either didn’t notice the look or just didn’t care.

“There it is!” said Seongwoo grandly, trying to dispel the strange atmosphere that was around the three.

“Here you go—,” Seongwoo wished he had asked her name, “Do you think you’ll be done with it by the next time we have class?”

“Oh yeah, of course. Thank you so much for doing this! You’re a lifesaver, Seongwoo.” She flashed a perfect smile before waving cutely in departure.

Once the girl had trotted off, Daniel spoke up.

“You’re really too kind. I’m sure she could have gotten notes from someone who actually knows her."

“It’s fine, its just notes,” brushed off Seongwoo before looking back down to his study material. For some reason, he just wanted Daniel to let it go.

“Don’t you need that for homework this week?” asked Daniel with one eyebrow raised skeptically.

“Awe shit,” said Seongwoo, suddenly worried that he had given away his only lifeline to a passing grade. He turned to his open laptop to check what his assigned homework was for that class.

“It should…,” Seongwoo clicked around on the open document, checking the content, “be fine.”

Seongwoo grinned in response to Daniel’s unamused look.

“Maybe you should watch out, she seemed interested.”

“Yeah, her and everyone else,” joked Seongwoo. There was something in Daniel tone that was putting him on edge. Daniel definitely wasn’t as casual as his tone was trying to portray.

And since when did Seongwoo have to ‘watch out’ in the face of a potential date? Daniel had gone from wingman to protective somewhere along these past few months and Seongwoo wasn’t really sure what to do with this new development.

His heart felt warm at the prospect of Daniel looking out for him, maybe even jealous of what had just happened, but his head was reminding him that they weren’t anything. Just two bros, flirting, suggesting, and apparently holding hands since Seongwoo suddenly felt a warm hand encompass his own before a thumb started to rub his knuckles.

“I’m just saying. Being the best looking guy on campus might actually have its downfalls.”

“And yet, I have yet to find any,” snorted Seongwoo.

He still squeezed Daniel’s hand reassuringly, though.

---♡---

Seongwoo entered his room to find Jaehwan sitting on the wrong bed, eating out of a ziplock bag full of trail mix.

“Isn’t that Jisung’s?”

Jaehwan looked down at the bag as if he wasn’t sure how it got there. He just shrugged before crunching down on an almond.

Seongwoo shrugged in return before returning to his earlier goal, which was to find a decent outfit for the night. Which wasn’t usually anything hard, but it was starting to get colder when the sun disappeared behind the horizon which meant that Seongwoo had to start rotating his closet.

As Seongwoo rummaged around in the closet he could feel Jaehwan’s eyes on his back.

It wasn’t too uncommon to find Jaehwan ignoring labels like, ‘not his bed’ or ‘not his food’, and an odd stare every now and then wasn’t that far out of the question, so Seongwoo wasn’t going to say anything.

But he could feel how heavy Jaehwan’s gaze was. It was unusual in weight and begging to be acknowledged.

So Seongwoo turned to face him. “You need something?”

“I was just wondering if you wanted me to switch rooms with Daniel.” Another loud crunch, this time a cashew.

Seongwoo returned his attention to the closet now that he realized it wasn’t something serious. “Why would I want that?”

“Dude.” Seongwoo felt an M&M hit his shoulder. “I saw you and Daniel at the coffee house.”

“You’re cleaning that up, Jisung will literally die if we get ants,” said Seongwoo into a shirt as he reached far into the closet.

“Don’t ignore me,” pouted Jaehwan.

Seongwoo turned his head to look back at Jaehwan.

“Why would seeing us at the coffee house make you think that? We go there all the time.”

“Yeah, but aren’t you guys dating now?" asked Jaehwan with a raised eyebrow.

“No?” said Seongwoo as he pulled out a sweater he doesn’t remember owning. Maybe it was Jaehwan’s.

He held it up against himself. He would look great in this sweater.

“I saw you guys sharing a dessert,” Seongwoo opened his mouth to retaliate, but Jaehwan cut him off. “You were feeding each other.”

Seongwoo looked to the side, unsure how to explain the situation. Seongwoo wasn’t even sure what the situation was himself, let alone if there was even anything to say.

How did one explain to your roommate that every now and then you and your other roommate liked to tease each other, insinuate things, maybe even act like a couple sometimes and somehow, along the way, both parties had kind of come to a nonverbal agreement that they were just having fun with it? There was no pressure for more from Daniel’s side of it and Seongwoo was having too much fun, so the idea of saying something was nowhere in his thoughts.

Seongwoo didn’t really know how to describe what was going on, at least to a level that would actually make sense. All he knew for sure was that they definitely weren’t dating.

There was significantly less kissing involved then if they were dating. Which was none. So flirting and having fun: yes, dating: no.

So, at this moment, since he didn’t even know how to explain the weird relationship dynamic him and Daniel had fallen into, Seongwoo settled on at least reassuring Jaehwan.

“And you took that as me wanting you to move out of our room? Why would I ever want that, you own amazing sweaters.” Seongwoo swayed back and forth with the sweater pressed up to himself to prove his point.

Jaehwan smiled from his spot on Seongwoo’s bed, nearly finished with his trail mix. He laughed at Seongwoo’s display. “Well, you're not wrong, but isn’t that your sweater?”

Seongwoo immediately put it on, now claiming it as his own.

---♡---

Some Thursday night, Seongwoo found himself enjoying the night by lounging on his bed, his butt pressed up against the wall with his legs held up in the air, phone held above his head as he scrolled through it.

A knock on his door and Seongwoo tilted his head back to see who his visitor was.

Daniel poked his head in through the small opening he gave himself.

“What are you doing?” asked Daniel.

“Helps the blood flow,” easily replied Seongwoo after returning his attention back to his phone.

“Whatever you say, man, but listen, do you a have a moment? I need some help,” said Daniel. From Seongwoo’s upside down view, he could see an upside down Daniel holding his hands together in an upside down pleading gesture.

Seongwoo swung his legs off and around to the side of the bed in one grand movement, righting himself as he went. “Yeah of course, what’s up?”

Daniel gave him the rundown as they walked the short distance between rooms.

“For some reason my internet won’t load? I can’t figure out how to fix it, I’m just hoping you might be able to try something I haven’t yet.”

Daniel finished his explanation right when they made it to his and Jisung’s shared room. He shut the door behind them as they stepped into the room.

“You sure you don't have a virus? Watching too much porn again?” joked Seongwoo with a smirk on his lips. The laptop was already open on Daniel’s bed so he just helped himself.

“You’ll never let me live that down, will you?” came Daniel’s dejected voice from the other side of the room.

Seongwoo looked up from his newly acquired spot on the bed, another clever quip ready on the tip of his tongue only to quickly perish on the spot.

Seongwoo was greeted to a very, very nice view of Daniel’s shoulders. His bare shoulders. Suddenly, Daniel was shirtless and Seongwoo had no idea why.

“W-what are you doing?” squeaked Seongwoo. He really hated himself for how caught off guard he was.

“Hmm?” hummed Daniel as he turned to Seongwoo before looking down at himself like he too had just realized he was suddenly without a shirt. “Oh, Jisung and I are going to be hanging out with a few friends from high school, so I gotta get ready.”

Seongwoo took a deep, calming breath as subtly as he could. Jesus almighty, Lord have mercy.

Daniel laughed, which caused his newly exposed abs to flex wonderfully.

Seongwoo whipped his eyes back down to the computer. Daniel, the mother fucker, had abs? Seongwoo had no idea.

Sure, he knew that Daniel was in a dance club and sure he knew Daniel hit the gym every now and then but he had never actually seen that he had them. It wasn’t like Daniel made it a habit to walk around the apartment shirtless, so this new information along with the visual was very close to short circuiting Seongwoo’s brain.

Seongwoo could hear Daniel humming a light tune as he made his way around the room, collecting things as he went.

Seongwoo clicked around on the computer, trying to find the problem as fast as possible. Seongwoo took a quick glance at Daniel’s still bare torso. He could have sworn that getting ready did not warrant being shirtless for this long.

He couldn’t help but take a few more quick glances as Seongwoo messed with the computer. He wasn’t getting any progress done like this, so he bit his lip and strengthened his will. Both the devil and Daniel were testing him, but he would not crumble.

With his focus solely on the computer screen, Seongwoo was able to find out that the problem had been a simple fix of Daniel’s wifi being turned off. When Seongwoo clicked it on, he couldn’t help but feel like he had been lured into a trap.

“Fixed,” called Seongwoo soullessly as he placed the laptop back onto the bed before standing up to make a quick getaway. He knew he couldn’t be in the vicinity for much longer without a proper distraction. Seongwoo was pretty sure something mighty embarrassing that involved his own body might happen if he stuck around.

Right when Seongwoo had almost escaped, sweet freedom only a few more steps away, Daniel suddenly pulled Seongwoo into a hug. Seongwoo raised his hands instinctively only to find his arms now squished up between their bellies.

Oh god, Daniel was so warm and his abs were amazing to touch. It took everything in Seongwoo’s willpower not to splay his fingers against Daniel’s skin in an attempt to feel just a bit more.

“Thank you so much! I really couldn’t afford to take it down to the shop again,” said Daniel into his ear.

As Daniel pulled away, Seongwoo’s willpower crumbled. It had stood tall for too long, and Seongwoo was a man of simple needs.

So he couldn’t help himself. He allowed his fingers to run down the bumps and dips of Daniel’s abs as he stepped away.

He really hoped Daniel wouldn’t notice, but the smirk on his lips said otherwise.

---♡---

Monday nights meant that the apartment was having their weekly movie night. Tonight was Sungwoon’s turn to pick, but Jaehwan was already seated next to him, fingers itching to capture the remote if Sungwoon ever let his guard down.

Just as Seongwoo had made his way out of his room, Jisung emerged from the bathroom, freshly showered and ready for a relaxing rest of the night.

Both boys stalled in their steps when they took in the scene before them.

Jisung’s couch wasn’t a very big one, only a two cushioner, which practically meant a three person holding count. So, at the same time, both boys realized the gravity of the situation at hand. Which was Sungwoon, already sitting on the right side (Bless that boy) and Jaehwan taking up the middle. Leaving only one spot on the couch up for grabs.

Both boys bolted forward, but Seongwoo had just a few milliseconds on him, his natural need to acquire the best spot for his ass giving him a slight advantage.

After a well executed vault over the two occupants already on the couch, only accidentally tipping Jaehwan’s head a little bit with his knee, and Seongwoo was sitting pretty on the remaining spot of the couch. Seongwoo couldn’t even hear Jaehwan’s whining or Jisung’s grumbling with how proud he was.

“Awe, no one saved a spot for me? The provider of nourishment?” said Daniel when he stepped out of the kitchen, a bowl full of popcorn in his hands. He was just in time to see Jisung making a makeshift seat on the floor with one of the cushions he stole from the couch, using Sungwoon’s legs as a backrest.

“No worries, I got you covered,” said Seongwoo as he patted his lap, just as Sungwoon cheered from his side of the couch, having found the movie he had been searching for.

Daniel raised his eyebrows, a ghost of a smile playing on his lips. “Yeah? You mean it?”

Seongwoo just patted his thighs again in invitation.

A shrug from Daniel and then he was perching himself easily onto Seongwoo’s lap. Seongwoo let out a huff of a breath, suddenly acquainted with just how much bulk Daniel had as a person. Seongwoo’s thighs would not be making it through an entire movie like this.

Daniel chuckled from his spot when he felt Seongwoo squirming under him, laughing at Seongwoo’s discomfort.

Daniel's words of, “You know, I can move—” were cut off by Daniel neatly sliding down between Seongwoo’s legs when Seongwoo finally got them far enough apart.

Seongwoo let out a sigh of relief, thighs immediately thanking him. He rubbed the small amount of discomfort out of the top of them before realizing Daniel’s back was standing stiff in front of him, making it impossible to see the tv.

“Hey, relax, I can’t see,” said Seongwoo as he reached forward with his hands, coaxing Daniel’s torso back so that Seongwoo’s chest was flush with Daniel's back. Seongwoo’s arms were already around Daniel’s waist at this point and he felt like it would have been a huge shame if he removed them, so he didn’t.

Daniel still felt pretty stiff up against Seongwoo’s front but was slowly relaxing out of it as the beginning of the movie played in front of them.

After everyone had settled, Seongwoo felt a pinch to one of his legs. He yelped in response before peering over Daniel’s shoulder to glare at Jisung who was already giving him a rivaling glare of his own.

If Jisung had something to say he should have just said it instead of inflicting needless pain. It wasn’t like Seongwoo couldn’t cuddle with Daniel if he so chooses to.

Seongwoo retaliated with a foot flailed out a few times before he felt it connect with Jisung, who let out his own little yelp.

Daniel leaned forward, confused as to what Seongwoo was doing. Seongwoo just tightened his grip around Daniel’s waist, pulling him back to his previous position, determined to ignore Jisung for the rest of the movie.

Somewhere in the middle of the movie, Seongwoo moved his chin to rest on Daniel’s shoulder so he could pop a few popcorn pieces into his mouth.

Daniel stiffened up once again at the action but relaxed out of it a lot quicker this time around.

Seongwoo smiled to himself. It was almost unfair just how much fun he was having.

---♡---

It was Friday morning which meant that Seongwoo was blessed with only afternoon classes today. It meant that he could sleep in. It meant that he could get a proper meal before class and it meant that he could be lazy about getting ready.

So an hour after waking, Seongwoo was finally slinking into the kitchen to figure out what his breakfast was going to be.

He was greeted to the sight of Daniel slouching over a plate of toaster waffles. The fork laid untouched on the table and his eyes barely managed to stay open. Slowly, Seongwoo watched as Daniel’s head made it’s descent down towards the table.

Just before Daniel’s forehead would have been acquainted with a pool of syrup, Seongwoo quickly slipped his hand in between the plate and Daniel’s head, catching him with a gentle hand holding Daniel’s forehead.

When the boy didn’t move, Seongwoo pushed up on his forehead, forcing Daniel to straighten back up, only for his head to roll a bit on his neck. His eyes were still only barely open, but now Seongwoo could see how bloodshot they looked.

“Dude, Daniel, you look dead. Did you even sleep last night?” asked Seongwoo as he leaned in to pry one of his eyes open a little wider. The diagnosis wasn’t pretty.

“Hmm?” hummed Daniel, as if he just realized that Seongwoo was actually there. “Oh, no, I didn’t. Had to pull an all nighter.”

By now, Daniel allowed his eyes to fully shut as Seongwoo cradled his face in his hands.

“Your hands are warm,” commented Daniel, his words slurred a bit thanks to his drowsy haze.

Seongwoo’s heart thumped against his chest when he realized the position he was in. Here he was, feeling nice and domestic as he handled a sleepy Daniel. He couldn’t help but smile at the sight.

Seongwoo had once heard Jaehwan describe Daniel as just a puppy too big for his body, and in this moment he couldn’t help but agree completely. This was honestly the cutest he had ever witnessed Daniel to be, and he was grateful to any god out there that he got to be here to witness it.

Seongwoo tisked as he brushed back Daniel’s fringe from his forehead. Apparently, Seongwoo hadn’t been quite as fast as he thought he was in saving Daniel from a sticky demise since he felt the telltale signs of syrup in his hair.

“Uh oh, you’re going to need to shower before you go to class. You got syrup in your hair.”

Seongwoo tapped his forefinger and thumb together a few times, confirming that there was indeed syrup there.

“Uh oh,” repeated back Daniel, who sounded significantly more soulless when compared to Seongwoo’s version.

Slowly, Seongwoo could feel Daniel’s weight slouching farther into his seat, putting more of his weight onto Seongwoo as he allowed sleep to overtake him.

“Daniel, you got classes soon, right? Sorry, but I can’t let you sleep right now,” said Seongwoo sadly. Honestly, all he really wanted to do was just pull Daniel back to bed and allow him to get the rest he so obviously needed, but the other, more responsible part of him told him that Daniel got himself into this situation. If he needed to be pulling all nighters for school, it obviously meant he couldn’t afford to be skipping class right now.

Seongwoo leaned down a little more before slapping at Daniel’s cheek lightly. Daniel’s eyes blinked open at that.

“A constellation,” muttered Daniel quietly.

“What?”

“Right here, the stars.” Daniel rose a hand to swipe his thumb down Seongwoo’s cheek, right over the small amount of freckles that laid there.

It was then that Seongwoo realized just how close his face had gotten to Daniel’s own. He reared back suddenly, letting go of Daniel’s face as he went.

Daniel slumped forward a bit but caught his weight on his own before he could fall out of his chair. He woke up more the more he was forced to take on his own weight.

Seongwoo’s heart was a quick tempo against his chest. Jesus, Daniel was far more dangerous than he realized.

Daniel looked up from where he sat, looking much more awake than he had the whole morning.

“Sorry, did you say I needed a shower? Do I smell?” At that, Daniel lifted an arm so he could smell himself.

“Yes, you need a shower. Right now.” Seongwoo quickly made his way around so he could start shoving at Daniel’s back. “Go wake up a little bit, you need to go soon.”

Daniel grumbled at how Seongwoo was handling him, but in the end slumped out of the kitchen, leaving just Seongwoo with his red stained cheeks and the forgotten plate of cold waffles.

That had been different. It had felt far more intimate and significant than any flirting they had done so far. Maybe it was because Seongwoo hadn’t been prepared. Maybe it was because he knew Daniel was too tired to really understand what he was doing.

Maybe, because in that moment, it didn't feel like the game they had been playing but felt like something much more genuine.

Seongwoo looked down to the abandoned plate of food. With a resigned shrug, he sat down and finished the waffles.

---♡---

Seongwoo and Daniel found themselves huddled down on Seongwoo’s bed one Thursday evening since Jisung had kicked them off the couch. Something about having people over and how they were just going to get in the way. Seongwoo didn’t really care for Jisung’s reasonings, he just grumbled as he gathered his stuff to relocate.

Seongwoo leaned back onto the wall behind him, his textbooks and notes laid in a messy pile all around him. They even started to bleed into Daniel's own pile, who had taken up residence farther down Seongwoo’s bed.

Seongwoo stared up at the popcorn ceiling. There wasn’t much to really get out of it and returned with only finding a few indistinct shapes.

“College sucks,” mused Seongwoo to the ceiling.

“Amen,” said Daniel without even looking up from whatever he was writing.

“You know what, I’m done!” suddenly announced Seongwoo.

“You’re done?” asked Daniel, finally looking up to take in Seongwoo shutting all his study material.

“Well, not really. But I’ve had enough. All I feel like I’ve been doing for the last three years of my life is studying. I’m done,” repeated Seongwoo with conviction.

“Didn’t you literally just tell me that you had an important math test tomorrow that you couldn’t fail?” asked Daniel, now more amused at Seongwoo's antics.

Seongwoo swallowed. Oh yeah.

“I’m sure it’ll be fine..,”

“Here,” said Daniel as he picked up Seongwoo’s math textbook before handing it back over to him. “How about a reward for each problem you finish? I’m sure that will be a good incentive.”

Seongwoo looked over at Daniel, skeptical. “Yeah? Like what?”

“Hmm.” Daniel hummed a bit before looking over to the side, “How about some candy?” finally said Daniel after spotting a bag full on Jaehwan’s side of the room.

“I was thinking something more along the lines of taking a shot after each question,” said Seongwoo, tone as dead as his will to continue studying.

“Dude. You’d be wasted before you could even finished.”

“Exactly,” said Seongwoo with a proud smile. Daniel didn’t reciprocate.

Seongwoo let out a deep sigh. “Alright, alright, but do you got any better ideas? Candy isn't going to cut it.”

“Alright,” started Daniel, who had started to organize his part of the bed so most of his stuff was now out of the way. “Well, how about a kiss?”

Seongwoo whipped his eyes from where he had been eyeing the candy to Daniel, who was still looking down to his things like he hadn’t just uttered the words Seongwoo just heard.

Because he heard that right, right? There was no way he was that delirious yet. No alcohol in his system, not sleep deprived enough and not even close to being old enough to have gone senile.

He had just heard Daniel offer a kiss and there was no way he could chalk it up to being lost in translation.

Seongwoo laughed nervously. “A kiss? From who, you?”

Seongwoo may have been skeptical, but he wasn’t going to let Daniel out of this one that easy.

Daniel wasn’t looking down to his stuff anymore. Now, he was looking Seongwoo straight in the eyes when he said it.

“Well, yeah,” said Daniel with a confident smirk on his lips. “A kiss from me. Good enough incentive for you?”

That wasn’t playing fair. Daniel wasn’t sticking to the rules. They weren’t supposed to kiss. This was all supposed to be easy, breezy, no commitment, totally normal flirting.

But Daniel was now insinuating they kiss and Seongwoo’s brain was already pleading to him that he really shouldn’t cross that line.

“I dunno,” began Seongwoo. Brush it off. Play it off. Don’t take the bait. “How do I know it’ll be worth it?”

Fuck. Now he was being coy. This wasn’t going according to plan.

Daniel’s smirk stretched even farther. It made Daniel’s already boyish charms skyrocket and fuck.

Fuck because Daniel was now making his way over to his side of the bed, crawling on his hand and knees and Seongwoo had to swallow down excess spit at the sight.

This isn’t fair yelled Seongwoo’s mind when Daniel settled in close to Seongwoo.

Don’t do this yelled Seongwoo’s mind when Daniel spoke up, biting his lower lip to mask a nervous smile.

“How about an example then? I’m sure it’ll be worth it.”

Oh, it’d definitely be worth it. Seongwoo was far past the point of knowing that almost anything was worth a kiss from Daniel.

But was crossing the point of no return with whatever he and Daniel had been playing at one of the few things that weren’t worth it?

Seongwoo sucked in a breath. He held it in his lungs, allowed it to puff out his chest a bit.

When he let it out through his nose, it disturbed Daniel’s bangs with how close he was leaned in.

He still had time to say no. Daniel was waiting for an answer, always the gentleman.

But his eyes were beautiful this close, his beauty mark all the more remarkable at this distance and Seongwoo knew in his heart that everything would have been absolutely stunning even closer.

So Seongwoo swallowed one more time. With it went his fears, his inhibitions, his reasons as to why this was a bad idea.

All that was left was the knowledge that he wanted this and it was going to take a force much greater than his conscience to convince him otherwise.

So he pulled up his own smirk. The one he knew could get girls hearts pounding and boys doing a double take. He wanted to lay on the charm.

If he was going to do this, he wanted Daniel to want him just as much as he wanted Daniel.

“You know, I’ve kissed my fair amount of people. It’s going to take something special for it to be worth it.”

Seongwoo straightened his back, pulled his legs in so he could better steady himself.

“Are you telling me to prove myself, Seongwoo?”

The way Daniel had said his name made chills roll down his spine. Being the center of Daniel’s attention wasn’t exactly new, but this kind of attention was doing things to him. Gave him tunnel vision.

Daniel shifted even closer, something Seongwoo hadn’t realized was still possible. He was now sitting on the heels of his feet, giving Daniel some added height.

Seongwoo had to look up so he could say his next words directly to Daniel. “Yes, I am actually.”

Something seemed to flash in Daniel’s eyes. He no longer looked slightly reserved. Gone were the hints of hesitation that had speckled his actions and words.

Daniel’s hand slid up the side of Seongwoo’s neck until it was cupping the back of his head. Seongwoo could feel Daniel fiddle a bit with the short strands that grew there before Daniel’s other hand came up to cup Seongwoo’s cheek.

Daniel’s actions were slow, drawn out. It made Seongwoo feel special, taken care of, but it also made him impatient. He had swallowed down his inhibitions and he really didn’t need them slithering back up his throat before Daniel could actually do something.

Just when Seongwoo had had enough, right when his own hands had come up to wrap tightly into the front of Daniel’s shirt so he could tug the boy closer, Daniel finally closed off the space.

It was soft. Daniel’s lips were so soft, so much softer than any other Seongwoo had kissed.

Maybe he was biased, but it was honestly the softest, warmest kiss Seongwoo had ever experienced.

It had him curving in his spine so he could get those small milliliters closer, so he could press harder.

Daniel was soft but Seongwoo wanted hard. He let go of the front of Daniel’s shirt so he could slide his hands up his chest, all the way to Daniel’s neck.

Daniel’s hands shifted, maybe in surprise with how readily Seongwoo was reciprocating. But their strength renewed just before Seongwoo tilted his head more, deepening the kiss all the more.

Seongwoo felt like he was losing himself. Why had he ever even entertained the thought of not kissing Daniel? How could he have almost missed out on this?

The thought fueled Seongwoo all the more, hands tight on where they pulled Daniel to him.

Seongwoo’s ears seemed to ring in the silence of the room. Neither seemed to be breathing. What was breathing when Daniel could easily replace his air?

Daniel shifted once more in his spot, but this time a bit away from Seongwoo. Right when Seongwoo started to form the thought that Daniel was actually pulling away, Daniel instead just shifted his head from tilting one way to the other, pressing his lips to Seongwoo’s own once again before licking a warm spot on to his bottom lip.

With a gasp, Seongwoo flinched back, breaking the kiss and retracting his hands from Daniel all in one movement.

“Ahh, too much?” asked Daniel, but there was a laugh on his lips, a red stain on his cheeks to match Seongwoo’s own.

Seongwoo was breathing heavy. His thoughts were jumbled together but were slowly organizing themselves with every caught breath.

Without meaning to, Seongwoo’s tongue flicked out to lick over the still slightly wet spot on his bottom lip.

Daniel watched the movement intently.

“I think,” began Seongwoo once he caught his breath enough to talk without embarrassing himself, “That I’ll accept kisses as rewards.”

Daniel smiled his inhibition shattering, game winning smile.

Seongwoo only got three problems done before Daniel had Seongwoo’s back pressed down to the bed, licking into Seongwoo’s mouth like he wanted to steal all of his breath away. Like he really did want to become Seongwoo’s air.

Neither noticed the textbook falling off the side of the bed when Seongwoo shifted to wrap his leg around the back of Daniel’s thigh.

---♡---

Kissing Daniel had come as easily as the flirting had. Kissing Daniel when he nearly stumbled into the kitchen, still rubbing the sleep from his eyes came naturally. Daniel kissing him to distract him while playing video games happened easily.

Kissing Daniel was fun.

Almost everything regarding Daniel had come easily and naturally and Seongwoo loved every second of it.

But unlike the flirting, kissing had become their little secret. Before, they really didn’t try to hide the flirting, since they could easily dismiss anything people had to say about it.

Kissing, not so much.

Can’t exactly explain to the girl who had been sending hints from chemistry class that kissing your close bro wasn’t anything to worry about.

Which is really where the problem lied. Kissing actually, undeniably, meant something.

Seongwoo didn’t want to think about the implications of what that something was at the moment.

At the moment, he just wanted to drown in his newly purchased hot coffee as he and Daniel made their way across campus.

Daniel had gotten himself something cold and with whipped cream on top, a drink Seongwoo couldn’t fathom actually ordering on this cold January day.

Seongwoo watched as Daniel forgoed a straw to instead just pop off the dome lid so he could take a drink straight from the cup.

This wasn’t a new ritual for Daniel. Nearly every time he ordered a coffee, he either returned the straw or even went as far as to request his drink without a lid. Seongwoo never thought to ask what his reason behind it was back when it was a new thing he learned about Daniel.

After taking a long, scalding drink of his own coffee, Seongwoo turned to Daniel, ready to bid him farewell since they had made it to where their paths diverged.

When Daniel turned to him, he had the makings of a wonderfully sculpted foam mustache on top of his upper lip.

Seongwoo laughed a bit at the sight before leaning in. His back stiffened to a halt when his mind caught up to what he was about to do.

He had been about to kiss it off.

Seongwoo looked around to the students milling around, going about their day. No one knew they weren’t dating. He could get away with a stolen public kiss, right?

Instead, Seongwoo just reached up to swipe his thumb over Daniel’s lip, catching all the foam before popping his finger into his mouth to lick it off.

Daniel laughed a thanks before pulling Seongwoo into a quick hug so he could go rushing off to his next class.

Seongwoo watched him go, a sigh desperate to leave his lips.

Not kissing Daniel because of moral and public obligations; not so much fun.

---♡---

It wasn’t until the beginning of February that their dangerous game they had been playing had been exposed. Sure, at first, the game hadn’t been all that treacherous. No pitfalls and no consequences if someone had tried to call them out on it.

But as the game progressed, as both boys overstepped boundaries and made up new rules as they went along, the consequences of someone finding out became greater.

The consequence being that they would actually have to acknowledge that everything they had been doing meant something. The ignorance of what was at hand protected Seongwoo. Nothing really meant anything if no one said anything, right?

Well, right was right up until this day, because he had gotten careless.

The two of them were in the kitchen, rummaging around in the pantry, scavenging for items that could be deemed something close to a proper meal. They weren’t having much luck. In a college student infested apartment, there usually wasn’t enough ingredients that were up for grabs that were good enough to actually make a full meal out of, since all the fresh things had the bold wording of Jisung’s name written across them.

With a resigned sigh, Daniel emerged from his search with a nearly empty box of crackers in one hand and a forgotten can of chef boyardee in the other.

Seongwoo took the can from Daniel eagerly, because honestly, he was both hungry and broke enough to eat whatever he could around here.

When he turned the can to check the expiration date, he was greeted to the sight of a deeply rusted underside.

“Uhhhh,” started Seongwoo as he turned the can to show Daniel, “This isn’t good, right?”

“Uhhhh,” echoed Daniel as he took back the can to inspect it better, “Yeah, this is a big no go,” confirmed Daniel as he walked over to the trash can to immediately dispose of the contaminated food.

“Damn it,” muttered Seongwoo before taking up Daniel’s previous position of halfway inside the kitchen cabinet.

“Let’s just get takeout, I still have some left over cash,” said Daniel to Seongwoo’s lower half, the only part he could see since the rest was all the way into the pantry.

Seongwoo just rustled about a little more, doubling his efforts to somehow find some more food hidden behind random bags of sugar and flour.

“I can pay for us both,” assured Daniel when Seongwoo didn’t reply, apparently already aware as to why Seongwoo was so desperate to eat at home this time around.

With a resigned sigh, Seongwoo unearthed himself from the pantry. He glanced at Daniel out of the corner of his eye, his head low in admitted defeat. Even though he felt bad about not being able to foot the bill as often as Daniel, there was no way he was going to be passing up dinner just because of that reasoning.

“Really?” asked Seongwoo, voice quiet. Daniel just laughed at Seongwoo’s pitiful display.

“Anything for you,” said Daniel, a fond smile on his lips.

The look wasn’t really anything special since Seongwoo had seen Daniel's smile directed at many things and people. But in that moment, Seongwoo’s chest warmed a few degrees hotter under Daniel’s gaze. The meaning and context of his words were for him, and only him. It mesmerized and distracted Seongwoo to the point that he had forgotten that they weren’t home alone when he reached out to press a thankful kiss to Daniel’s lips.

In the moment, it felt like the exact thing he should be doing. Giving Daniel kisses as thanks. Giving Daniel kisses because he thought he was cute. Kissing Daniel just because he wanted to. Why didn’t he do so more often?

When he pulled back, he was rudely reminded to the fact as to why he didn’t do so. Over Daniel’s shoulder, at the entrance of the kitchen, Seongwoo was greeted to the sight of a near horror struck Jisung, leaving no doubt to what he had just witnessed.

Seongwoo froze up on the spot. Jisung must have frozen up much earlier than Seongwoo, since he was already through his defrosting stage and absconding from the scene, leaving Seongwoo to deal with Daniel’s suddenly worried look and hand that was now on his hip, squeezing him reassuringly.

“Seongwoo? Are you okay? I really don’t mind paying since I know you’ll be paying the next time,” joked Daniel, probably trying to lift the sudden uneasy atmosphere that had settled in.

Seongwoo was left to reassure Daniel, giving a hastily pulled together excuse that he had just remembered that he had a homework assignment that was due tonight.

Later, when the pair were sitting at a fast food dining table, Seongwoo begrudgingly realized that his hunger had been overshadowed by a dark hole of dread that had settled deep into his stomach.

---♡---

It had been three days since Jisung had witnessed the scene in the kitchen and Seongwoo was starting to get antsy.

It had been three days and Jisung hadn’t said a word to Seongwoo about it. Not even a hint of what he had seen had worked into Jisung’s actions as they ran across and interacted with each other at home. Seongwoo tried his best to not seem suspicious, let alone somehow do something to trigger Jisung into actually saying something. But after three days of basically radio silence from their most nosy and counselor like roommate, Seongwoo was starting to believe that he was more in the ‘only a few more ticks till the bomb explodes’ zone rather than the ‘he might be just letting this go’ thought department.

Because Seongwoo knew that Jisung would say something to him. It wasn’t a matter of if, but of when.

And when Seongwoo heard three precise knocks on his door when Jaehwan was conveniently out for the night, he knew the jig was up.

Without waiting for a reply, Jisung opened the door before shutting it behind his back. When the latch caught the door jamb, Seongwoo gulped. There was no getting out of this one, unlike the last time Jisung tried to get something out of him.

Neither boy even bothered with fake pretenses as Jisung made his way over to sit on the edge of Jaehwan’s bed.

“So,” began Jisung, “You and Daniel are dating now?”

Well, so far, nothing too crazy. Seongwoo sat up from where he was laying. Honestly, he had expected something a little more dramatic, but this was the better alternative.

“Uhm, well, not technically,” said Seongwoo. There was no point in even trying to either disregard what Jisung was asking or to play dumb. Both knew the other had seen each other after the kiss, so it would have just been wasted breath.

Jisung let out a resigned sigh as if he knew that was going to be the case. It made Seongwoo feel defensive, but it wasn’t like Jisung was wrong to assume so.

There were a few beats of silence.

“What exactly is going on then?” asked Jisung, his voice dripping with confusion, with a bit of desperateness buried in deep.

Seongwoo felt for the guy, he really did. Poor Jisung was probably just worried and confused. Daniel was the closest thing Jisung had ever had to real brother, and even though Seongwoo had initially met Jisung through a mutual friend and had only really become close with him after he had done him a huge favor by renting out a bit of his apartment to him, Jisung had ended up extending a brother like bond to even him. He could only imagine what it must be like between those two.

But, honestly, Seongwoo really wanted to give the ‘I don’t know’ answer again. Because for a large amount of the time he and Daniel had started to play this game, it was actually the truth.

But now, he couldn’t keep that up because he knew that he would be lying this time around. At some point, maybe after getting caught, he had come to the realization that all this actually meant something without really owning up to it. Wouldn’t even allow his mind to think up the words.

So with a deep, soul jarring sigh, Seongwoo finally allowed his deeply buried, true feelings to rise up to the surface.

“A lot, actually,” said Seongwoo. The words felt like rocks falling off his tongue from how long they were lodged in him, but when they finally split out into the air around them, Seongwoo felt like they could be better described as gems. Still heavy and hard, but something that had far more value to it.

“Care to explain?” said Jisung when it became apparent that Seongwoo wasn’t going to continue without further prompting, “Maybe like, when did this all start? Back when we talked about Daniel before?”

“Well, I can’t exactly speak for Daniel, but I can tell you my side of the story,” said Seongwoo. He felt a bit sheepish, a little nervous at the idea of maybe speaking for Daniel. He didn’t actually know Daniel's stance on all this, so he wasn’t about to make assumptions.

Jisung just raised his eyebrow at that but didn’t say anything. Because as far as he could tell, what he and Daniel had going on was complicated. Which, wasn’t true in Seongwoo’s mind.

Yeah, it was complicated to explain, and the mere idea of him having to do so right now set his mind reeling, trying to grasp onto a for sure shift in where things had started to change for them.

But everything that had happened up to this point had been the opposite of complicated. Never once did Seongwoo feel like a lost soul. Never did he ever feel like he needed to chase after Daniel and never did he try and play hard to get. Never once did he feel not good enough or insecure or maybe even doubt that Daniel hadn’t wanted what he was giving.

Every aspect of their relationship had been almost painstakingly perfect and fell together without a second thought. Sure, there were a few times when Seongwoo had been caught off guard, and even once when he had warned himself to back off. But those things had only been barriers that had been self inflicted. Only happened when Seongwoo started to think too hard about what was going on between them.

When Seongwoo had let go of those limitations, everything fell together perfectly.

“Well,” finally spoke Seongwoo after a few moments of hesitation, speaking up only after finally finding a hook in a memory he could pull on, “I’m pretty sure this all started last September, but I can’t say for sure.”

From then, Seongwoo began to recount minor milestones for Jisung, but there wasn’t too much to really dwell on. Everything had happened subtly and Seongwoo even found the words on his lips a little weird. Even he wasn’t quite sure how he and Daniel had switched from roommates to maybe, possibly, lovers in the span of five months.

Had it really only been five months? It’d felt like this had been going on for much longer. Felt more like a lifetime, with how easy everything had happened.

“We didn’t even start kissing until, like, a month ago,” ended Seongwoo anticlimactically.

“So, you’re dating,” deadpanned Jisung.

“No, we aren’t,” clarified Seongwoo. Neither boy had yet to ever acknowledge that what they are doing is beyond something normal friends do, let alone to even bring up the fact that their behavior could be interpreted as dating.

“So you’re using him?” asked Jisung, voice a little harsher on this question. His back even straightened, shoulders squared.

“No!” Seongwoo couldn’t get the word out fast enough. “I mean—yes, maybe—but no! If I’m using him, then Daniel’s using me right back,” finally concluded Seongwoo.

He couldn’t help but swallow down what little spit was in his mouth at the look Jisung was giving him. He’d never considered the fact that he might be using Daniel in all this, and he never wants to again. It left a slimy feeling down in his stomach, one that rolled around the more he unwillingly thought about it.

Was he using Daniel? Did Daniel think he was being used? The rational part of his brain fed back to him the same line he just gave Jisung. If Seongwoo was using Daniel, then Daniel was in turn using Seongwoo.

And nowhere along this strange journey did Seongwoo feel used. He had felt a lot of things: taken care of, warm, excited, even a little nervous at times. But never had he felt used.

“So what’s the point?” said Jisung, pulling Seongwoo out of his mental turmoil. Jisung’s eyes were sharp and he still looked ridged. It made Seongwoo want to pout a bit. He missed the caring, always reasonable and understanding Jisung. But then he remembered this was Daniel they were discussing. Jisung had always had a soft spot for all the boys who lived with him, but his softest spot was reserved for Daniel.

In a weird, roundabout way, Seongwoo suddenly felt proud that Daniel had people like Jisung to look out for him.

If only Seongwoo wasn’t on the receiving end of Jisung’s loyalty.

“The point?” parroted Seongwoo. The point was that it was fun and Daniel made Seongwoo feel both numb and warm at the same time. Made him feel delirious yet completely put together. Like he found an added treasure in his best friend. He couldn’t say any of that to Jisung though.

Jisung started to look stressed now, to the point of resignation. His shoulders were slumping in on themselves and Seongwoo kind of felt bad that he was causing this. “Yes, the point. You don’t just go around kissing people for the fun of it.”

“Well,” started Seongwoo, but snapped his mouth shut when he caught sight of Jisung’s glare. Who knew that sweet, small Jisung could actually look like he could and would twist your arm behind your back till the point of calling mercy.

“Unless you actually are just using them,” finished Jisung and damn it, the slime was back with a vengeance. To the point that Seongwoo was starting to feel nauseous.

So Seongwoo took a deep breath, tried to reign in the sudden urge to vomit up all the nasty slime and collect his thoughts.

Did he have a point beyond reasons that only mattered in the present?

“I used to have a crush on him, back when he first moved in,” blurted Seongwoo. He wasn’t really sure where he was going with this but it was the first thing he could think of that might actually lessen the damning stare Jisung had yet to stop looking at him with.

“Used to?” asked Jisung, voice incredulous.

“I had to get rid of it back when I thought Daniel was straight,” explained Seongwoo.

“And it’s back now that Daniel started to show interest?” asked back Jisung, who was trying to connect the dots as to why Seongwoo was saying all this. Seongwoo was still trying to do the same thing.

“Maybe?” Jisung didn’t look impressed. Seongwoo was starting to get frustrated even with himself. He raked a hand thought his bangs almost roughly, pushing them back off his forehead.

“I dunno, okay?” said Seongwoo, his tone now bleeding with the frustration. Why was this so hard? This was why he never thought about this shit before, it was too much of a hassle. “I was pretty sure it had come back when I didn’t realize what Daniel was trying to pull. Back before you told me he was interested. But he hadn’t said anything about dating or if he liked me when I started to flirt back with him and I guess I might have forgotten about the crush sometime in the middle of having all of Daniel’s attention.”

The slime was still swirling around in his stomach, to the point that it felt like it was slithering up and into the words that were filling the room. He wasn’t sure if it was a good or bad thing.

“Maybe I was scared that I had misinterpreted what his intentions were when he hadn’t said anything about the flirting. Maybe I started to think that you had given me false hope but at that point, we were too far down the ‘not quite just friends’ anymore path so I forgot about my crush and just decided to live in the moment. But then things kept escalating and now we are here. In a place that I had felt completely comfortable in before you came in here and forced me to actually confront myself on why we aren’t actually dating yet!”

Seongwoo was breathing heavy. Jisung looked worried. He hadn’t realized that his voice had been raising in volume as the words spilled out of his mouth involuntarily. He hadn't even realized that he actually felt that way until they had manifested on his tongue and into the air around them.

He felt like a bucket of cold water had just washed over him. It stung, facing all his hidden fears and worries in one moment. His heart was beating rapidly against his chest and he was pretty sure it wasn’t only because he had to catch his breath at the end of all that.

It almost physically hurt to realize that he had been wrong.

This was what Seongwoo had been hiding from this whole time. His insecurity. His fears. He had been hiding from the fact that he actually wasn’t sure where he stood with Daniel or if he would actually date someone like Seongwoo. That maybe he thought Daniel wasn’t saying anything because he was just enjoying the moment but wanted nothing beyond it.

Seongwoo realized that he had just been fooling himself with all this ‘I don’t know’ and ‘just live in the moment’ nonsense.

But Jisung was smiling now and it helped calm his heart a bit. If Jisung was finding something to smile about in this situation, maybe he was seeing something Seongwoo wasn’t.

“So,” started Jisung as he sat up straight again in his spot, “You’re afraid that if you admit that you want more from Daniel that he’ll reject you?”

Seongwoo allows Jisung’s words to swirl around him. He hadn’t ever actively thought about it, but they didn’t sound wrong. Especially in this moment, now that he was actually allowing himself to think about what he wanted out of everything that had been happening between him and Daniel.

This talk had done a number of things on Seongwoo, but the worst was the realization that he actually did want to be dating Daniel. Actually wanted the title of ‘Boyfriend’, all shiny and lustrous. So he could finally give a concrete reason as to why he had been turning down the girl in Chemistry. So he could actually kiss Daniel whenever he wanted to.

Seongwoo hadn’t replied, but the silence on Seongwoo end must have been answer enough for Jisung since he was standing up.

“You need to talk to him. I’m sure all your worries will be worked out. Daniel’s easy going, maybe even to a fault, if this was any kind of indicator,” concluded Jisung as he rubbed the last remains of stress out from between his eyebrows.

Seongwoo watched Jisung take the few steps to the door before he hummed a placating confirmation. Which seemed to be enough, since Jisung now had his hand on the doorknob.

“And thank you, for this talk. I can tell you got a lot to think over, but I want you to know I’m here if you need anything, maybe even to talk again if need be,” said Jisung after he stopped halfway into the hallway. His expression was the softest Seongwoo had seen all day, and it made a little bit of warmth grow in his chest. Something he sorely needed after only feeling cold since his revelation.

“Of course, I know you’re just looking out for Daniel,” said Seongwoo.

Jisung laughed at that.

“And for you, too, even if it doesn’t really feel like it right now,” said Jisung before he finally actually took his leave, shutting the door behind him.

Complicated feelings had never been Seongwoo’s strong suit and this talk had only reinforced that fact. Now that Jisung had left Seongwoo alone with his thoughts, he nearly balked at the idea of having to have this emotional talk repeated to Daniel.

But after a few second, Seongwoo decided that, no, maybe he didn’t need to have the exact same talk that he had just had with Jisung. But at least he should try and finally figure out where exactly the two of them were with each other. For Jisung’s sake, if for nothing else.

---♡---

Seongwoo was sitting on the left side of Jisung’s horribly run down couch while Daniel occupied the, recently covered, right side. Sometime in the last month, Sungwoon had finally had enough and had gone out and bought a nice, plush throw blanket, which now adorned the right side of the couch, effectively covering the worst of the stains.

Both boys had a laptop perched on their laps, backs slouched low against the back of the couch as their focus zeroed into the information that filled their screens. They had taken up these spots a few hours earlier and hadn’t moved since.

The sun had fallen low in the sky, making the room an uncomfortable dim, causing Seongwoo’s eyes to strain in the low lighting that surrounded his bright screen.

When Seongwoo was starting to debate the pros and cons of actually getting up to turn on the light, it seemed that his thoughts had summoned Jisung, who had just returned home with Sungwoon in tow. Jisung tisked at the dark room and the boys who willing sat in it before he flicked on the overhead light.

Both boys groaned as the sudden change of lighting. Sungwoon laughed in passing as both he and Jisung made their way to the kitchen.

Disturbed from his trance, Seongwoo sat up so he could stretch out his legs in front of him. He could nearly feel his joints creaking with how long it had been since he moved them.

Seongwoo heard Daniel laugh a light, exasperated sound before he felt fingertips gliding over the back of his head, fixing the strands that laid there.

When Daniel had pulled his hand away slowly, he grazed against Seongwoo’s cheek on the takeaway. A wave of deja vu overtook Seongwoo.

He turned to a grinning Daniel, smile still as radiant as ever.

“There, much better.”

Seongwoo smiled in thanks before lifting his arms to in turn stretch out his back, a yawn forming on his lips.

Before he could fully get it out though, he was cut off by the feeling of soft lips pressed up against his lower lip and even his teeth.

Started, Seongwoo dropped his arms onto the shoulders of a leaned in Daniel, who was grinning up at him.

“Dude, my mouth was open.”

“I realized,” quipped Daniel before scooting closer on the couch, moving Seongwoo’s laptop off of his lap and onto the coffee table so it was out of the way. “You just looked too cute, I couldn't not kiss you.”

Seongwoo felt his cheeks heat a bit, but he still managed to grumble out meaningless disgruntled words all the while tightening his hold around Daniel’s shoulders.

Daniel laughed before pecking at Seongwoo’s lips one more time. “See? There you go again.”

Seongwoo couldn’t help but blink a few times, taking in the moment. His chest felt warm and light. Sometime in the last month, Daniel had taken up kissing Seongwoo, even if there were others around to witness. Like everything with Daniel, Seongwoo had just gone along with it, even when a buzz of nerves would shoot through his body. The kisses made him lightheaded, feeling perfect in the moment but left a sense of something missing after the takeaway.

Daniel’s hair was falling into his eyes, which meant that he was due for a haircut soon. A lot of time had passed, hadn’t it?

Without even realizing what he was doing, Seongwoo felt his mouth move to form the words he never thought he would say, at least anytime soon. Even though his talk with Jisung had been a few weeks ago, Seongwoo could never gather the courage. Until now, it seems.

“Daniel, are we dating?”

It was sudden and out of the blue, Seongwoo knew that. Daniel raised his eyebrows. Very sudden, but not unwarranted.

Because here they were, cuddling on the couch, all the while grinning at each other like the other had hung every star in the sky. Like they really had been dating for months. Like every worry Seongwoo might dig up had no footholds because Daniel’s smile could starve off any doubts Jisung could remind him of.

Seongwoo vaguely registered Jisung’s monotoned call of, “Get a room.” accompanied by Sungwoon’s snickering as the pair emerged from the kitchen to return to their rooms. He paid him no mind since there was much more pressing matters to be dealt with.

Matters like Daniel, whose eyes were now in cute crescents as he laughed. The smile was still dorky, the laugh still a pleasant chime, but nowadays it almost hurt Seongwoo’s chest with how warm his heart would get whenever it was directed at him.

Daniel hummed a contemplative note as he leaned down to place a brief kiss to Seongwoo’s shoulder.

“I dunno, do you want to be?” casually asked Daniel, like he was simply asking if Seongwoo wanted some cream for his coffee.

Daniel moved to get his knees up on the couch and under him so he could press forward a bit more, causing Seongwoo to lean back with the momentum.

Daniel pressed small kisses here and there as they resituated themselves on the couch, which were nice, but distracting.

“Are you trying to bribe me with kisses?” finally asked Seongwoo, because directly facing his feelings was hard and direct answers were even harder.

“You love my kisses, they’re equal to a reward.” Daniel pushed a firm one to Seongwoo’s lips to prove his point.

Seongwoo just groaned before flopping his weight back onto the couch because Daniel was right.

Daniel just laughed as he laid down on Seongwoo’s own laying form. The armrest had become a proper pillow for Seongwoo while Seongwoo’s chest had become one for Daniel.

But now, the initial heavy atmosphere had dispersed enough for Seongwoo to allow a smile to form on his lips. When it came to Daniel, it had always been fun and easy going. Why did dating have to change that?

“Then yes, I want to date.” Seongwoo heart was beating against his ribcage and he was sure that he could see Daniel’s head rise with every thump.

The intensity of Daniel’s stare made his face burn.

“If only for the kisses,” said Seongwoo quickly, throwing in the joke for his own sanity.

Daniel sat up a bit, so he could properly look at Seongwoo in the eyes. He was trying his damned hardest to keep the contact but he was sure Daniel didn’t realize just how sharp his gaze could be. It felt like it was cutting deep into Seongwoo’s soul the longer it kept up.

But then, the look broke into one of Daniel’s goofy grins and Seongwoo could nearly feel himself slump into the couch with how sudden all the tension had drained out of his body.

“I’ll take it,” finally said Daniel before pressing another kiss to Seongwoo's lips. It took a few seconds for Seongwoo’s mind to catch up to the moment, but when he did, he couldn't help but groan into the kiss. He felt Daniel smile against his lips.

The kiss was nothing new. They had shared many at this point, even a few just a few minutes before. But this was something brand new.

It made Seongwoo feel weightless. Like all the burdens he had kept burying further and further into himself had finally been vacated. It felt like the sky had opened up after it had been drizzling for days. It felt like Seongwoo could finally breathe, even though he hadn’t even realized he had been rasping for a proper breath.

Seongwoo never really thought himself much of a person who would get caught up on labels, but this carried more to it than just the title of ‘boyfriend’. The kiss signified that Daniel liked him just as much as Seongwoo did. It signified an actual start.

It meant that Seongwoo could truly, finally, allow himself to love Daniel in every way he had been too scared to do for many, many months now.

The moment had been ruined when Daniel and Seongwoo broke apart at the sound of Jaehwan stomping noisily past the pair.

“Not dating, my ass, ” grumbled Jaehwan as he made his way to the kitchen.

Neither boy really felt the need to tell him the news. Seongwoo was sure everyone would know soon enough anyway.