Chapter Text
Jeonghan had always been different since the day he was born.
He had been born one of four other pups. He was a small pup, considerably smaller than the rest of his littermates who had always towered over him from a young age.
Even though he was considerably smaller than his brothers, Jeonghan had the biggest paws that he never quite grew into – they were weirdly disproportionate, and he was always tripping over his own paws. He had beautiful chestnut fur with no markings at all, odd since his brothers were all grey with their own distinct markings.
Jeonghan was also different in his human form. A scrawny, small human compared to his tall, overbearing brothers. He was different no matter what form he was in.
Maybe this was what pushed his brothers to force him into the omega role, maybe it was just pure primal instinct or maybe it was just that Jeonghan was always made for the role of omega.
Even so, Jeonghan didn’t make it harder for them to push him into the role.
From a young age, he was overpowered by his brothers, constantly the last at everything. It didn’t help that Jeonghan was a timid pup, always indecisive and unsure of himself. This made it easier for his brothers to push him into the omega role.
Even when Jeonghan grew up, blossoming into the biggest wolf in the pack, he could never seem to escape the position of omega and the role had become ingrained in him.
His place as omega was solidified the day his brother had assumed his place as beta in the pack. From then on his brother’s aggressive behaviour and eagerness to assert his dominance had permanently forced Jeonghan into the omega position.
Jeonghan who could have stood tall and towered mightily over the other wolves was forced to have his tail tucked in, shoulders hunched, and head lowered – moving with caution and uncertainty. He became the brunt of all the frustrations the other wolves had – in his wolf form or his human form – used as a scapegoat for everything and anything.
The other wolves in the pack never passed the chance to assert their dominance over him, especially the mid-ranking wolves who were constantly trying to prove they weren’t omega material.
He was always the last to eat when the pack fed as wolves and when it was his turn to eat all he ever had were measly scraps and bones to gnaw on. Due to this, Jeonghan lost most of his size within the first month of being omega.
He had more than once tried to eat out of turn and had quickly learned that an angry alpha was not to be messed with.
Jeonghan was constantly bitten at and growled at even when he tried to keep a low profile, always receiving worse treatment than the other omegas in the pack.
His once silky fur developed bald patches, that never got a chance to grow back with the constant harassment he endured, and he was covered with scars that showed on his arms when he was in his human form.
It all changed Jeonghan. Unlike the other omegas in the pack who still took chances playing around with the dominant wolves, Jeonghan retreated away from the pack – spending more time as a human.
Jeonghan began to despise his ability to switch between wolf form and a human form. He often wondered if it were easier if he had just been born a human that presented as either alpha, beta, and omega with very little of the instinctual side of things – the side he hated.
Of course, if anyone in his pack were to hear his thoughts he would have been shunned even more than he was already. The ability to switch between wolf form and human form was seen as something special – a superior gene gifted to only a few.
Jeonghan loved being in his wolf form, he always felt free when he was in his wolf form and it just felt right but his life as an omega wasn’t easy and often forced him to stay in his human form.
Being in his human form meant that he was alone as the rest of the pack usually stayed in wolf form but that meant that when he was in his wolf form he was tormented for never being in wolf form more often.
It was an endless cycle.
Jeonghan knew he could never escape his role as an omega no matter how hard he tried or at least that was how his situation made him feel – he had been forced into the position and it had become so ingrained in him he couldn’t imagine ever acting like anything other than an omega. He would not know how to act like an alpha or a beta.
He knew he would always be lonely as an omega in the pack he was in now and worse he feared he wouldn’t survive long as an omega within his pack.
Jeonghan knew real wolf packs were not like his pack but human consciousness and wolf instincts sometimes did not mix well together, and his pack was an example of that.
Pack life had become more about social status and power than it was about unity and Jeonghan craved the attention he should have been getting from his pack but just never got from his pack.
**
For the longest time, Jeonghan had felt something building up inside of him – a burning desire that he couldn’t fully comprehend. He didn’t know what it was, but he felt the need deep inside of him.
He knew there were other things out there in the world – better things – that he could find. Something other than the life he was living now.
Jeonghan knew lone wolves didn't fare well usually but he had to try.
One night, when the wolf pack was howling, Jeonghan took his chance to slip away in human form to resist the urge to howl. He knew the other wolves were too distracted howling to notice he was leaving.
Jeonghan was unsure of where he would go or what was actually out there, he had only ever known his natal pack, but just leaving his pack was enough for him.