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Sirius awoke mid laughter, but couldn’t quite remember why.
He also awoke fully erect (i.e. on his feet, standing, thank you all very much), leaning against the doorway of an unfamiliar room, face to face with James.
“Sirius, mate, you alright?”
“Am I dead?” Sirius replied stupidly.
“You what?” asked James, his face screwed up in exaggerated confusion.
“Ready to go?” a voice said behind him.
Sirius wheeled round. “Moony, you’re here too!”
“Of course, I am,” said Remus, beaming. He looked different Sirius thought, but when he tried to remember what he thought Remus looked like he realised he couldn’t.
“I think he’s still drunk from last night,” said James patting Sirius on the shoulder. “We’re off to the caf on the corner to get something greasy for breakfast,” he told Sirius. “Coming?”
“Of course,” said Sirius. He followed the other two down the dank corridor and down some steps which led straight to the front of the door. A balding man sat behind a large desk reading a newspaper.
“Morning boys,” he said in a bored voice without even looking up from the paper. Sirius tried to sneak a look at the date on the newspaper, but as he tried to get near the man shifted and looked straight at him. “Alright?” he asked.
“Alright,” mumbled Sirius.
“See you later, George,” waved James cheerly already halfway out the door.
Sirius jogged a couple of steps to catch up with Remus. James was already several paces ahead. “Remus,” Sirius said quietly. “Where exactly are we?”
“Bournemouth,” smiled Remus. “James’s stag don’t you remember?”
“Oh… oh yeah,” said Sirius not wanting to look stupid. “Where’s Peter?”
“Who’s Peter?” asked Remus, with a look which made Sirius think Remus knew exactly who he was talking about.
“Nothing,” mumbled Sirius, suddenly not quite sure himself.
Remus slipped his hand in to Sirius’s, whose heart skipped a beat. He looked down at their clasped hands and back at Remus, his throat suddenly feeling very dry.
Remus smiled softly. “You alright?”
“Never better,” sighed Sirius, his voice reaching barely above a whisper.
“Come on you two love birds,” interrupted James voice. “I’m starving!”
The sun shone through the window reflecting off the dust particles in the air. The whole world seemed to move slowly here, thought Sirius. The mother in the corner gently rocking her pram back and forth, the tall guy in high vis by the counter cracking a joke with the man behind it, all seemed frozen in time. Even the steam rising from the teapot between them seemed to move in slow motion.
“Can you pass me the ketchup, babe?” asked Sirius.
“Sure,” said James and Remus at once, and all three of them erupted in loud laughter, drawing looks from around the café.
“Here you go,” said Remus, who tore the bottle out of James’s hand with a roguish grin. “From me,” he added hooking his leg around Sirius’s under the table as if to assert his claim on Sirius.
“No, mine,” said James who leaned round the table to latch himself onto Sirius’s torso.
“Stop it, the two of you,” Sirius told them sternly. “There’s no point in the ketchup if I can’t eat my breakfast, is there?”
The two reluctantly let go of Sirius. Remus, however, kept one foot locked around Sirius’s and smiled shyly from over his drink. Although there was no reason for it, Sirius could feel heat rising to face. He looked back at the dancing dust motes and hoped that the world was truly frozen in this moment. Or that at the very least the earth was spinning extra slowly today, just for him.
Much later, at the beach the boys lounged on towels next to discarded newspaper sheets that once contained fish and chips. The date on these read Thursday 22nd February 1979, but it was far too warm for February so who knew what date it was! The sun hung low in the sky emitting a red glow which still felt warm despite the cool sea breeze.
“Your go,” James said and Sirius had to redirect his attention away from Remus who had fallen asleep face down in his book and back to the cards in his hand.
Sirius ran through his hair and cold water droplets ran down his spine. “I don’t know man, you’ve already beaten me three times and I’ve got a shite hand again.”
“A bad workman always blames his tools, eh, Pads?” James laughed loudly, making Remus jump awake.
“Wassup?” he asked groggily.
“Just about to whoop Sirius’s ass!” James told him cheerily. Sirius didn’t mind losing really, especially not to James. James liked winning so much, it was hard not to feel happy for him even when one had had their arse whooped.
Remus sat up with a yawn, and thoughtfully looked at Sirius’s hand. “I think you should twist,” he said.
It was a queen.
“Damn it Moony,” said Sirius. “I’m bust.”
James roared with laughter once again, this time making a dog and his walker who happened to be walking by jump.
“I know,” Remus said quietly, clearly pleased with himself. “Will you come for a walk with me?” he asked.
“Sure,” said Sirius. “James, we’re just… er… we’re going to go for a walk. Moony and me.”
“Oh sure,” said James cheerfully. “Don’t mind me. I’ll be quite happy here with this book,” he said picking Remus’s book. “Grapes of Wrath?” he asked looking at the title perplexed. “Angry fruit, my favourite.”
“Come on,” said Remus tugging on his hand.
Sirius stood up and let Remus pull him along the seafront.
“You had a good day?” asked Remus.
“The best,” Sirius said earnestly.
“Good,” said Remus, and then remained silent for a long while. They walked like this for some time, hand in hand, the sea just barely lapping at their ankles. Finally, they seemed to have come a full circle, although Sirius did not remember turning around. He could see James just up ahead, playing with a snitch that was just barely visible against the darkening sky. Sirius stopped walking abruptly, suddenly feeling like all the air had been pushed out of his lungs.
“You know I love you,” said Remus who had also stopped walking and was now face to face with Sirius. Remus looked older now, with greying hair and deep lines around the eyes.
“I,” he tried to say, but it got caught in his throat. The world felt very cold all of a sudden, the fading sun no longer offering any heat. “Remus,” he managed to splutter as his legs gave way beneath him.
“Woah, you’re ok there, buddy,” said James leaning over him now, glasses askew on his face.
“Does it hurt?” he blurt out clinging on to the front of his robes. Hogwarts robes he realised.
“Just like falling asleep,” James told him.
“Sirius, I love you,” called Remus. Sirius could not locate him in the dark. “Sirius, I love you.”