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Shiro doesn't know if he can be considered a good father. He's doing what he can with Romi, but sometimes he fears that it might not be enough. Still, he takes things one by one.
Romi is not his but his brother's. Was his brother's.
It's still fresh in both of their lives, and they try to move on as best as they can. But, unlike Ryou, Shiro had never been one to think about kids and family, too focused on his career.
This, all in all, has been an adjustment for him as much as for Romi. He fears sometimes that he's doing a terrible job, making his brother's memory a disservice. So he tries to at least get the easy things right.
He always goes to pick up Romi on time, arriving five minutes before the kids are free to go, and making sure his niece sees him the moment she steps out of the door. He doesn't know if it does something, but he doesn't want her to think there is no one to pick her up, even for just a second.
She's a good kid, a little quiet now, but trying to be as happy as she can, all things considered. Ryou had done a great job with her.
It's why he's so disappointed at himself today, since he's running almost forty minutes late. He had promised himself to do this one thing right, but had butchered it up not even two months into it.
Shiro had called, of course, the moment he had realized the problem, but the guilt still eats him up.
When he finally makes it to the school he asks directions to Romi's classroom and hurries it up. He reaches the door that he's a little short on breath, and he tries to calm himself down before he enters.
He wants Romi to know he's sorry, but he doesn't want her to feel bad about it.
Shiro knocks after one minute, after his breath has evened out. Allura, Romi's teacher, opens the door with a smile.
"Shiro," she says, amicable as always, "come in. Romi is just playing with a friend."
He cracks his neck and sees his niece drawing with another kid. They don't seem to be talking much, but every once in a while one of the two pokes the other and shows off what he's drawing. They look completely at ease, and Shiro feels some of his guilt recede.
"Romi," he calls, anyway, and the child looks back at him. Her face lights up and she smiles at him, waving.
"Uncle Shiro," she says, motioning for him to join them. "I was drawing you a picture."
"You were?" he asks, sitting down beside her. He spares a look at the other child, who's not really looking at him. He's back to looking at his drawing, and he doesn't seem interested in Shiro or the conversation.
"Yeah. Miss Allura said you had a rough day at work, and that was why you are late," Romi explains, with a little smile, "so I wanted to cheer you up."
Shiro feels something close up in his throat, emotions that try to bubble out of his mouth. He knows he can't really cry in front of the kids, so he pushes it down, and smiles at her.
"Thank you, Romi," he says, trying to cover up the way his voice breaks at the end with a cough, "I appreciate that. And I'm sorry I couldn't come before."
"It's okay," she says, brushing it off, but he thinks of the day he had to pick her up after his brother's accident. She had waited at the school for an hour, before he could go to her.
He had promised one thing.
"No, I promise it won't happen again," he says, probably more to himself than her. He had to set up rigid rules at work, make sure everyone knew where his priorities lie.
"Arriving late doesn't mean you love her less," someone says, interrupting Shiro's inner monologue, and it takes a second to register who had talked. The kid is still drawing, not even looking at them. "Arriving late doesn't mean you're bad."
Romi smiles at him, nodding along. "Yeah. Akira's dad can't make it on time, but that doesn't mean he doesn't love him," Romi says, almost as if she's repeating something. Shiro wonders if maybe the kid, Akira, had said that to Romi to make her feel better.
"Of course," he says, nodding, "your father probably loves you very much."
Akira looks up at Shiro, finally. His eyes are deep and piercing, almost as if he's trying to study Shiro with a single glance. His eyes seems to be older, almost as if he had to grow up too fast.
Shiro guesses it's something he and Romi have in common.
Still, they need to get going so he gets up and smiles at Romi. "Get ready, okay? We need to go."
Romi glances at Akira a second before nodding and running to her things. Shiro watches her go and Akira simply goes back to reading.
Shiro hovers them for a second, wondering if he should just say goodbye, but in the end he thinks he doesn't want to disturb the kid. He walks over to Allura and smiles at her.
"Thank you, I'm sorry for the problem," he apologizes, but she shakes her head.
"Don't worry about it, Romi was a delight. Also Akira's dad always arrives after an hour or two, so I usually always stay behind to keep an eye on him," Allura explain, looking at the child. Shiro follows her gaze and tries to think what that could mean for a kid. "He's just very busy," Allura continues, with a sad smile, "he takes care of Akira alone, and he doesn't have a hotshot job."
Shiro knows she's referring to him and he refrains from sticking his tongue out to her. He has worked hard to reach where he is now, and had it not been for Romi he wouldn't have stopped here.
Still, priorities are different now.
Romi runs up to him and smiles. "I'm ready," she announces, before looking back at Akira, "Bye! See you tomorrow!"
The other kid glances briefly their way, but goes back to his drawing quickly. He seems to look lonely, alone at that table.
He doesn't have the time to wonder about it for too long before they are out of the door.
That night he apologizes to Romi again, and says it will never happen again.
Romi gets real quiet for a few seconds before she tells him: "I was scared that maybe you weren't going to come. But Akira told me it was okay, and he gave me one of his pencils. It would have been very scary being alone, but Akira was there, so..."
Shiro nods, pushing some of Romi's hair out of her face. "Does Akira wait alone often?"
Romi looks a little sad. "Everyday. But he gets really angry if someone talks badly about his dad."
Shiro doesn't say anything else. He kisses her on the forehead and shuts down the light. But he thinks.
The next day he arrives at the school five minutes earlier, as usual, and he waits for Romi to get out of the class and rush up to him. He hugs her and listens as she tells him that she did a new drawing today.
Shiro lets her talk for a minute before he smiles at her. "Romi," he asks, "do you want to stay here a little more?"
His niece looks startled at that, a little confused. "In school?"
Shiro nods in reply and tries to smile. "I was thinking. Akira was kind enough to keep you company, maybe we could keep him company today."
The child looks at him for a second, almost studying him, before she nods. "Yeah," she says, her voice a little small and wobbly, "I think he feels lonely sometimes."
Shiro kisses the top of her head and nods, taking her hand and guiding her back into the school.
Allura seems surprised to see them and he smiles at her while Romi rushes inside the classroom to sit beside Akira. He watches them and notices the way the other child looks at Rmi surprised, almost a little scared.
"What are you doing here?" Allura asks, surprised and Shiro shrugges.
"I usually have the rest of the afternoon free," he explains, smiling. "Romi tells me he gave her a pencil to make her feel better. So..."
Allura laughs a little at that and shakes her head. "You'll have to talk to his father if you want to make this a normal thing. But I guess it's fine. He does look lonely."
Shiro nods at her and then wanders over to the two kids, sitting down beside them.
Akira watches him like a hawk, confusion clear in his eyes. It seems like the kid is trying to figure him out.
"Can I draw with you?" he asks, and Romi immediately nods, giving him a piece of paper.
Akira seems surprised for a second, but then he gets back to his own drawing. Tough kid. Still, Shiro is very stubborn.
He starts drawing, thinking of a scene from the story he had read to Romi the night before. She would enjoy it, he thinks, and at this point he thinks his life revolves around what Romi would enjoy more than anything else.
He looks up to look at the two children's drawings every once in a while, and while Romi's is full of pastel colors and soft angles, Akira's is all sharp red and black.
It looks like he's drawing a house, and by the looks of it, one that isn't exactly new.
"You're really good," he tells Akira, before smiling at Romi. "You too, of course, but the four drawings on the fridge are proof enough."
Romi smiles while she keep drawing, but Akira stops and looks at Shiro. It seems like he's thinking, so Shiro leaves him the time to figure it out. From what he has gathered, Akira is shy and he's slow to trust other people.
Romi told him the boy had troubles making friend in the class, and since Romi is the same way, it's the reason they had started to hang out. Akira doesn't like talking, and he prefers to sit in silence drawing but, Romi had told him almost conspiratorially, he liked to talk about his drawings. And his dad.
So Shiro had tried his luck, and it seems like he's actually succeeding.
"This was grandpa's place," Akira tells him, putting some more red on the roof. "Dad likes it there. We haven't been able to go. Dad has to work too much."
"Did you like it?" Shiro asks, trying not to push. Akira nods, and smiles a little.
"Yeah. It was fun. We saw a lot of lizards. Those are cool," Akira looks up at Shiro, almost to see if he thinks lizards are cool. Shiro nods because what's not to like about lizards while Romi makes a disgusted face.
"No, lizards are gross," she tells them, shaking her head, "I like ladybugs."
"Ladybugs are boring. Also a lizard could beat a ladybug in a second," Akira tells her, proudly. Romi looks taken aback for a second before she scowls.
"But a lot of ladybugs could take out a lizard," she informs him, almost as is she's talking science.
Akira doesn't look convinced, watching her with distrust.
"How much are a lot?" he asks. Romi thinks for a second before she looks at Shiro, almost as if he should have the answer. He's not sure what's going on, but what the heck.
"Two hundred?" he tries, thinking that probably the kids don't even know how to count that high. The two children nods, thinking about this new information.
Shiro is so lost.
It's how, one hour later, he's trying to figure out how many butterflies would it take to avenge the death of the five hundred ladybugs defeated by the one hundred lizards. Kids . It's also how Akira's father finds them.
Romi and Akira are talking fast to each other, pausing to look at Shiro to receive numbers and then starting right back where they had just stopped, but the boy stops immediately and gets up quickly screaming "Dad!" when he sees his father enter the classroom.
The man, Akira's father, looks like the aged up copy of his kid. Enough that Shiro is sure that Akira will look exactly like that in some years.
He also looks tired, if Shiro is being honest. And attractive, sure, but Shiro hasn't had any time to date ever since Romi has come into his life. So he just puts that information in the back of his mind and gets up.
Akira's father watches him, and Allura reaches them with a smile. "Keith, I want you to meet Shiro, he's Romi's uncle."
Keith nods at Shiro and after he looks at Romi. He doesn't smile, but his faces becomes a little less stern and he relaxes a little. It seems that, much like his son, Keith is slow to open up and doesn't trusts someone on sight.
This... might make what he wants to propose a little more difficult.
"It's a pleasure," he says, smiling, and looks down at Romi. "Why don't you two get ready while I talk with Akira's dad?"
Romi studies him for a moment before she nods and reaches for Akira's hand. The boy looks unhappy to get away from his father, but he goes when the man nods.
Shiro and Keith watch the two kids go a second before Shiro turns towards the other man. "Hi. I'm sorry for this. Your son was very kind to Romi yesterday, and I wanted to do... something." Honestly there wasn't anything more to it. He wanted to make the kid feel a little better like he had made Romi feel better.
Keith looks surprised before he nods. He seems to be relaxing a little, probably thanks to Allura smiling at them. He has to trust her to let her watch Akira everyday, after all.
"It's okay," Keith says, shrugging, "he said she was a little sad because..." the other man stops, probably realizing that mentioning the accident isn't a good idea. Shiro is grateful.
"Yes," he acknowledges, "so I was thinking that we could do this an everyday thing. Me and Romi usually don't have much to do when we get back home and they seem to like each other."
Keith looks taken aback at the proposition and he looks at Allura, surprised and a little confused. Even Allura looks surprised.
"I mean, it's okay for me. You know it's no problem to look after Akira, he's a sweet kid, but he and Romi do get along. And I trust Shiro. Also he smiled more today than in all the months I've been looking after him," she says, smiling a little. On the other side of the classroom Akira and Romi are silently getting ready, but they seem to be talking a little every once in a while.
They aren't exactly normal kids, or so Shiro thinks, but it seems they might have found each other.
Keith still seems to be lost in thought and Shiro should probably be offended, but he appreciates a parent who looks out for his kid. Even when they make him feel like a terrible person.
"Thank you," Keith says in the end, "I think he would like that."
Shiro smiles, proud. "Believe me, it's going to be my pleasure."
So, after that, it becomes a routine. Shiro goes to pick Romi up and they spend one or two hours with Akira, waiting for Keith to show up.
Akira has been opening up to him more and more every day, and after a while he looks up from the drawing and smiles at him every time Shiro enters the room. It makes him feel a little special, almost as if he has conquered something important.
Akira is shy, and a little reserved, but he seems to be a very sweet boy underneath that hard shell. He and Romi go along great as always, a little closed off in their own little world, but Shiro is glad that they have someone to share it with.
Even Romi has been better ever since this situation started, seeming to be more happy and carefree even at home. Shiro feels kind of proud of himself for what he's doing.
On the other hand, there is the matter of Keith.
It's not like Akira's father is a problem per se, but while Akira has been slowly but surely opening up to him, it seems like Keith is relentless in being as cold as possible to him. It doesn't look like he does it to be a dick, but Shiro kind of feels like it.
Still, Shiro probably hasn't just found what he needs to make him open up. It's not like he spends much time with the man, after all, only five minutes a day while they wait for the kids to get ready.
He had tried to invite them out for an ice cream, but Keith always has to run, having too much to do. Akira always looks disappointed at the idea of not having ice cream with them, and Keith looks surprised at Akira's sadness.
Shiro can't seem to find the key to Keith, and while Allura laughs at Shiro's struggle, he's stuck.
"You should just give up. It's not that important, right? Keith is just antisocial," Allura tells him, but Shiro doesn't believe her.
Akira loves his father, talks about him more than anything else, and the picture that he has gotten from Akira's stories, is completely different from the ones he sees in Keith.
He's intrigued, he can admit that.
"You're smitten," Allura corrects him, with a knowing smile. Shiro ignores her without really thinking about it.
That's ridiculous.
One day Keith calls while Akira and Romi are fighting over one of their imaginary animal fights. Allura answers, but the more they talk, the more worried she looks. Shiro leaves the kids to talk it out and reaches her, worried himself.
"That's fine, Keith, but I can't stay here that long," she's saying, biting her lip, "I have a trip planned for the weekend and..."
Shiro catches her attention and tries to ask her what's going on. Allura sighs and mimics to him that Keith is going to be three hours late. It's a lot, and Shiro himself wouldn't be able to stay in the school for that long - after all he needs to take Romi home.
That thought makes him pause and he extends his hand, motioning for Allura to give him the phone.
The teacher looks at him for a second before nodding and giving him the phone.
"Keith?" he says, talking in the phone. "It's Shiro, Everything okay?"
"Yeah," Keith's voice comes, a little curt—he's probably annoyed and frantic—"but work is taking more that I thought and I can't leave and..."
It seems the other is working himself to a panic attack so Shiro interrupts him quickly. "Look, I know it's not ideal, but what if I take Akira home with us? I'll give you my address and you can come and pick him up later."
Keith is silent on the other end of the line, and Shiro fears he has pushed a little too fast. It's clear that Keith is not very comfortable with him, or maybe he just doesn't like him, but it's the only solution Shiro has been able to think about.
Still, after a second, Keith says, "Thank you. That would be... yeah, thanks."
Shiro smiles, making a victory gesture to Allura, that smiles relieved. "Great, let me just give you my address. And we'll see you when you can."
"Yeah," Keith repeats, and Shiro is pretty proud of himself.
When they tell Akira that Keith is stuck at work and that he'll go home with Shiro and Romi, the boy looks sad and disappointed. He tries to cover it up, but his face falls quickly. Shiro looks a little heartbroken himself at seeing the kid’s reaction.
It's probably why he goes out of his way to make the night fun . He picks up the ingredients to make pizza, and while they burn down the whole thing and are forced to call for actual pizza to be delivered, they still have fun.
They end up watching a disney cartoon and while Romi falls asleep immediately, Akira remains awake for a long time.
"My dad is a good dad," Akira says, out of the blue. On the screen the kid is fighting with his father and Shiro tries to swallow his pizza around the sadness in his throat.
"I know he is," he reassures the little boy, "he loves you very much. It's obvious." And it is, because Keith's world revolves around the kid. It's obvious in the way he looks at the child and how hard he works for him. From what he knows, they don't have much, so Keith tries his best. Shiro really admires him.
"I just..." Akira starts and then looks back at his hands, ashamed. Shiro reaches and touches the kid's har, comforting him. "I sometimes wish he worked a little less," Akira admits, before his eyes swell up with tears. "Don't tell him that, please. I don't want him to be sad."
Shiro's heart breaks and he takes the kid in his arms, trying to silence him. Unfortunately, he thinks, there is nothing that Shiro can do to help them, even if he wants to.
Keith arrives late. Late enough that he has put Akira to sleep on the couch. The other man looks wrecked , he resemble a zombie more than anything else.
"I'm sorry," is the first thing Keith says, but Shiro shakes his head.
"Don't worry about it, we had fun. We made pizza, and then promptly threw it out because I'm terrible in the kitchen," he admits, with a smile. "Do you want to get in? No offence but you look terrible. And Akira is asleep, he wanted to wait up for you but he fell asleep."
Keith doesn't enter and when Shiro talks about Akira he just squares his shoulder, almost as if Shiro had offended him.
"I love Akira," Keith says, his voice low. Shiro looks at the other surprised by the non-sequitur. I know he wants to say, but the other man continues, "I have to work so I can give him what he deserves. I have to , and I don't need anyone's pity. Or judgement."
Shiro is speechless, wondering what the hell the other is talking about. Judgement?
"Wait, wha--?" he tries, but the other continues.
"And while I'm grateful about today, I don't think you should keep doing what you're doing. I..." Keith is saying getting more and more worked up and Shiro has to stop him.
"No!" he says, a little bit too loud. He looks back, but it seems like he hasn't woken up the kids. "I don't know where this is coming from, but I know you love Akira. It's obvious! And I'm not judging you, I admire you!"
Keith, interrupted mid rant, looks a little like someone who has swallowed a lemon and is stuck with a face in between disgust and shocked surprise.
"Admire me?" he repeats, slowly, almost as if he doesn't think he heard correctly.
"Look, I... I don't know what I'm doing. I don't think I can ever be as good as my brother. But Akira adores you," he says with a smile, "and I can only wish Romi one day would feel that way about me, but I'm a disaster."
Keith takes in his words for a second before telling him, slowly, "at least you pick her up every day at the right time."
Shiro wants to laugh hysterically. "It's the one thing I can do. Everything else I fuck it up, so I forced myself. And that's it! You're a great dad, really."
Keith still looks shocked and, a second later, a blush covers his cheek. "Oh," he says, and then he puts his red scarf over his mouth, covering his own face. "I thought..."
Shiro stops and takes in the new informations. Oh , indeed.
"Is that why you have been so..." he stops, trying to find the right words to say what he wants to say, but it seems the other immediately understand.
"Shut up," Keith says, but Shiro can't help but laugh, surprised and amused by the circumstance. He wants to laugh for at least ten minutes straight.
For a second he thinks Keith is going to take offence, but soon the other smiles at himself and Shiro feels like someone punched him the face.
He had won over Akira slowly, and had enjoyed every moment of the little challenge; but with Keith, it seems, he does it all at one and the smile the other gives him it's enough to take his breath away.
"Maybe," Keith says, "tomorrow we'll take you up on that ice cream."
Shiro only nods and he thinks back at Allura's words ( you're smitten ) and how much he had denied it.
But damn, he's smitten.
They wake up the kids and, before going away, Keith looks at him and smiles again, something small and a little shy.
He's completely smitten, but he doesn't think it's that's a bad thing at all.