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“Chuuya-san, good morning.”
Chuuya lets out a shriek as he turns around and sees Akutagawa on his couch. The younger man doesn’t even have the decency to look guilty for scaring the living daylights out of him. Such things don’t usually frighten Chuuya but it’s only 5 in the morning and he hasn’t really slept much.
“You. I sent you home hours ago.”
Akutagawa looks away but doesn’t say anything. Chuuya hates that he’s in this situation before his morning coffee. He leaves Akutagawa to sulk and only sits next to him when he has a cup of coffee in hand.
“Look. If you don’t tell him, he’s never going to know and he’ll think that you hate him. Forever. Is that okay with you?”
Akutagawa, honest to god, nods.
“No!” Chuuya shouts at him. “You are not okay with this. If you are, you are no subordinate of mine! And - ” Chuuya glances at the clock “ - you really need to get out soon because I have a guest coming soon.”
“... This early?”
“NOT THE POINT.”
Chuuya’s front door swings open and Dazai walks in, a satisfied grin on his face.
“Hey, Chuuya, I… Akutagawa-kun…” he turns to Chuuya. “Are you cheating on me?”
At the same time, Chuuya shouts, “how did you get past my fingerprint system?”
And then he flushes.
“No! What the fuck! AKUTAGAWA, you will not breathe a word of this to anyone.”
Akutagawa nods. Chuuya smiles at him before he throws him out. He closes his door behind him despite Dazai’s whiny protests.
“Look, Akutagawa, you tell him or you don’t. Either way, you live with it.”
“... Like you and Dazai-san?”
“Yes, like me and Dazai,” Chuuya says softly before he glares. “Don’t tell the bastard though.”
“Oh, Chuuya! I am so touched. My petite hat rack, I love - ”
Chuuya kicks him back into the house and holds onto the doorknob. Dazai wails as he continues pulling on it.
“Good luck,” Chuuya says before he goes back into the house.
Akutagawa hears Dazai letting out an ‘oof’ as he falls onto the ground but then he hears soft murmurings and a fond chuckle from Dazai and thinks that yes, he wants that too.
He wanders the streets of Yokohama and even though he now walks the main streets and not slink around the side streets, he still feels very much like the boy who had spent most of his life running. After all, by not facing up to the… strange palpitations of his heart whenever he’s near the damned Jinko… is he not then still running? Never mind that he thought he had been having a heart attack the first few times it happened. He also remembers telling Chuuya and having the Executive laugh at him for half an hour straight before finally putting him out of his misery by tossing the truth out.
“Akutagawa?”
The man looks up and frowns when he sees Atsushi. Chuuya told him that he should really stop doing that because it sends the wrong signal but Akutagawa’s wondering why he even has to send any signal.
“Jinko. What are you doing here?”
It’s Atsushi’s turn to frown and he glances pointedly at the red building next to them. Right. Figures his feet would lead him here.
“Come with me, Jinko,” Akutagawa says before he loses the courage to do so.
Atsushi stares at him for a few seconds before nodding. Akutagawa immediately starts walking away. Atsushi jabs him in the arm when he catches up.
“You could have waited.”
“Hn.”
Atsushi’s eyes widen before he looks away. It’s not that Akutagawa blames him or anything; he knows that he has never been nice to Atsushi, not even once, since they’ve met. So it’s not really unexpected that Atsushi would find it strange that he isn’t trying to rip him apart. Both figuratively and literally.
Akutagawa turns into an alleyway and Atsushi follows him without question. He doesn't realise how endearing that is until then. He pauses after a while of walking and looks at Atsushi.
“So, what did you want to bring me here for?”
“Over there,” Akutagawa says as he points further down the lane, “is where Gin and I used to huddle together under some spare rags that we scavenged from dumpsters.”
Atsushi blinks but remains silent. Akutagawa makes his way further down the alley and turns a few corners before stopping.
“And here is where I discovered my Ability. Some bastards were trying to hurt Gin and I made sure that they couldn’t anymore.”
There isn’t any remorse in Akutagawa’s voice but for once Atsushi understands.
“Akutagawa – ”
“I don’t bat an eyelid when I kill people, innocent or not. I don’t generally trust people because I have never been given a reason to and the one person I trusted… He abandoned me.”
“Aku – ”
“What I’m trying to say is that it’s hard for me to change and it’s unlikely that I ever will but meeting you has made me feel like there might at least be a chance.”
Akutagawa feels like his heart has stopped beating the moment those words leave his mouth. He has never felt so exposed before and it terrifies him more than anything. He is sure that he has never felt so much fear in his life and he hates it because it makes him feel weak. His thoughts are interrupted when Atsushi places an arm on his shoulder. He looks up to see the teen smiling at him sweetly and thinks that that is possibly the only thing in the world that can soothe such fear.
“Well, then I’ll help you.”
“…”
Atsushi smiles and slides his hand into Akutagawa’s slowly. He raises their linked hands up and draws closer to Akutagawa.
“Also, I think this is what you meant to ask me, right?”
Akutagawa nods numbly. And when Atsushi smiles and grips his hand tighter, Akutagawa feels as if there might be more to life than just destruction and violence after all.