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Importing media to Night Vale was very much hit and miss, not that Carlos had tried other than the once. He could sort of see why Animal Farm had been banned - not like Night Vale was the first place to do so ever. And to be honest he didn't even care. It had been that one book he had begun time and again because it was a classic and never gotten even halfway through. It was a little too Alice in Wonderland for his tastes.
But his copy of The Lord of the Rings? Seriously, Night Vale? Seriously?
"It's elven supremacy propaganda," Cecil explained and made to snatch a fried locusts from his plate. "You probably don't notice these things at all, you would have grown used to it. They don't regulate these things at all on the outside. And then they act baffled when whole towns disappear into fairy rings!" He gave Carlos a pitying look for growing up amongst those horrors.
Well, he had grown affected by the US politics; the pity wasn't unappreciated, if a little misaimed.
They were in a little diner named The Ten Plagues, a quaint little place with mismatching chairs and a crocheted oven mitt as the centerpiece of every table. Carlos had taken one look at the menu and taken fried locusts and shaved ice for dessert, Cecil picking the frogs. The beef is an acquired taste, he had said and Carlos hadn't asked.
"I take it Night Vale tells very different tales," he said and retaliated by stealing a leg of a frog from Cecil's plate. It was a very mild taste, a little like chicken and little like fish.
"Parents tell them to keep children in line; if you don't behave, I'll leave you in a fairy ring. Eyes are open, nobody's home, boy slept under an elven dome. Legs keep dancing, mouth keeps screaming, elven magic and elven scheming." Cecil's voice lent very well to ominous rhymes. Carlos told him so and Cecil beamed like he had just asked to marry him. He licked his fingers clean to make Cecil blush.
So Night Vale could take his books from him, fine. It couldn't stop him from writing fanfiction.
The conversation with Cecil had given Carlos an AU plot bunny where Sauron was actually the Great Good of the story and the elves so beautiful because they stole beauty from other creatures - which was why the orcs were so ugly. The Nine were trying to save the hobbits kidnapped by an unscrupulous ranger at the behest of an evil wizard and Frodo was desperately trying to figure out who was telling the truth. Perhaps part of the reason for this plot was healthy fear of the Secret Police, but it really was a fun romp to write.
Legolas knelt by the bound man's side, his fair hair floating around his face. His eyes were like blue sea lit by drowned stars at the bottom; there was nothing human about him. But perhaps there was a hint of imperfection around those eyes, cobweb fine marks of times past. Not even elves could be truly ageless.
"Fear not, for on my face you will be granted immortality," he told to the man who was desperately shaking his head. "For your kind the end is night from the moment of your birth, but I will be beautiful forever." The curve of his smile was cutting with honesty. This was the truth to him and certainty enough to move mountains.
Legolas cut the man's chest with a long, shallow strike and pressed his fingers into the wound. The rag pressed into the man's mouth muffled his screams into desperate whimpers. That moment something bright seemed to glimmer in the wound, flutter like a bird trying to escape a hand come to grasp it from its cage...
"Carlos the Scientist," a stern voice called out and Carlos jumped, turning away from his computer. Behind him stood a woman - it probably was a woman, going by the voice - dressed in heavy vest, black balaklava covering her face. Carlos felt his heart freeze in his chest. He had thought this was anti-elf enough...
"By the order of the City Council you are to finish your story so that it can be added to the mandatory High School curriculum. A happy ending is mandatory. You have been granted the Gorgon Creed Librarian Grant for this purpose. You are allowed to lament over this on odd new moon nights." The woman turned and left through the window, closing it after herself. Carlos didn't even have the time to ask if she meant odd as in uneven or odd like, well, odd.
That was one way to ensure he would finish the fic.