Work Text:
Masami shudders and abruptly wakes up, almost falling off the bed.
He dreamed about Tachibana - holding her in his hands. Her slender waist under his right palm, the tiny shoulder under his left. Shadows on her cheeks from the long eyelashes. Her thigh barely touching his. An overwhelming and breathtaking spring spinning all around them, plashy sunlights and leaves shadows dancing on her white dress, almost translucent in the bright sunlight, and his fine shirt. Her frailty - and his dizziness from feeling it so close, feeling almost drunk from it. And he was so purely happy, so hopeful and fragile at the same time because of this feeling long lost somewhere in his far adolescence, and his heart was beating so fast and loud, and...
He knew then what he wanted to do next, and woken up in horror.
He looks up in the dark. His heart still beats too fast from that dreamy happiness, and he still feels a bit dizzy. His palms remember the cloth of her dress and the heat of her skin underneath it... and it really shouldn't feel so good. As remembering this embrace that never really happened really shouldn't cause this warm wave of pleasure going all the way down the spine.
He groans and rubs his face, looks at a dimly shining clock near the bed. Half past four. It's too early, but he might as well get up, he won't sleep anyway. With a vague hope, he tries to remember what day is it and recalls the 'Garden' schedule. Today is Wednesday, right?
Of course, Tachibana's shift is on the schedule today.
Of course, it will be impossible to stay away from her all day. Of course, they will get all alone at some point.
Of course, he won't do anything, and won't say anything, and won't give himself away. He's an adult after all, and he can...
Masami painfully winces and throws away the blanket; he hisses quietly as he steps on the cold floor and then presses his feet against it. The cold sweeps away all the unwanted sensations. He rubs his face again and smacks the cheeks a few times, trying to sweep away the unwanted thoughts, too.
He is an adult man and he can...
...decide for himself what to do and take responsibility for his actions...
...just restrain himself.