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2018-02-25
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just a girl

Summary:

It used to feel like there wasn’t a single part of this school that Kate belonged to, or that belonged to her.

Being the principal's daughter didn't seem to matter nearly as much as being the girl with the dead mother; the girl everyone avoided because they weren't sure how to talk to. She drifted through the halls, trying not to attract attention. She existed at school like she wasn't even there.

But that was before; now everything feels different, because now Kate is with Emaline.

Notes:

Just a quick little vignette. Let me know if you'd be into reading more of these!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

It used to feel like there wasn’t a single part of this school that Kate belonged to, or that belonged to her. 

Being the principal's daughter didn't seem to matter nearly as much as being the girl with the dead mother; the girl everyone avoided because they weren't sure how to talk to. She drifted through the halls, trying not to attract attention. She existed at school like she wasn't even there. 

But that was before; now everything feels different, because now Kate is with Emaline.

Emaline walks around school with the kind of confidence that can part a crowded hallway, and she owns every room she walks into. Any seat she wants is hers for the taking. She’s territorial, and Kate can feel it starting to rub off on her. 

They meet every morning before class in the southeast stairwell, the one where they first confessed their feelings for each other. They've spent so much time there, have inhabited it so completely, that Kate has starting to think of it as theirs

This morning Emaline is sitting three steps up with her headphones on and her back against the wall, legs stretched out comfortably in front of her. She’s wearing this oversized army surplus jacket they found last week at the thrift store--Kate having tactfully avoided mentioning that it reminded her of Oliver’s--and her black Dr. Martens, which she taps along to the inaudible beat of whatever is playing on her Walkman. 

Kate likes this version of her: down to earth but a little edgy, like it’s not a vibe she’s consciously projecting but one that feels authentically hers.  It’s kind of incredible, Kate thinks, how one person can have so many different layers and wear all of them so well.

Emaline's face lights up when she sees Kate coming.  “Hey beautiful," she says, swinging her legs down to make space on the step beside her.

“No one looks beautiful before eight o’clock in the morning."

"No one except you."

Kate can’t do anything in reply except smile. They've been together for a couple of weeks now, but that hasn't changed Emaline's particular knack for leaving Kate speechless. She’s still not used to the nervous, elated sensation she feels in her chest whenever she remembers that Emaline Addario is her girlfriend

“What are you listening to?” she finally manages, scooting closer.

Emaline takes her headphones off and hands them over, and Kate recognizes the upbeat, driving guitar riff almost as soon as it reaches her ears. The song has been playing on the radio a lot lately, but it's not the kind of music Kate usually listens to and she hasn't paid much attention to the lyrics. 

‘Oh I’m just a girl, guess I’m some kind of freak, ‘cause they all sit and stare with their eyes…’

"No Doubt?” she guesses.

“Duh! 'Tragic Kingdom.' Have you heard it?"

Kate shakes her head, handing back the headphones, and Emaline stows them inside one of the numerous pockets of her jacket.

"You have to," she says emphatically. "Gwen Stefani so cool. She dresses in all of these, like, sports bras and track pants, but she makes it look so hot, you know? Like she can pull off anything. She just wears whatever she wants, and doesn’t cares what anybody else thinks.” She studies Kate's eyes for a moment, smiling. "Kind of like you."

"Me?" Kate echoes. "As if!" She shakes her head and nudges her shoulder playfully against Emaline's, earning a laugh. "I care what you think, don't I?"

The short giggle trails off and Emaline's eyes widen a little, her expression soft and slightly awed. "You do?"

"Duh."

They stare at each other for a moment wearing matching bashful smiles. Emaline's grin is soft and beautiful and perfect, and Kate can't think of anything that feels half so good as being the one to make her this happy.  

A couple of kids squeeze by them on the stairwell as the warning bell sounds for the start of homeroom, which means Kate was supposed to be at AV Club five minutes ago to prepare for morning announcements. "I gotta go," she says apologetically, reaching for her bag. 

"Your place later?" 

They usually go to Kate's house after school on Fridays, and sometimes Mr. Messner invites her to stay for dinner. But Kate shakes her head regretfully. "I can't," she says. "I promised Luke I'd hang out tonight. His mom's out of town and he's having this movie night... thing."

"Oh."

She can hear the disappointment in Emaline's voice, and she hesitates for half a second before asking, "Do you want to come with?"

She knows Emaline still feels a little ambivalent toward Luke. There's an awkwardness there, and maybe a lingering jealously, like she's still not sure what to make of Kate and Luke's brief but very public relationship. "Tyler and McQuaid will be there too," Kate adds. "McQuaid's insisting that everyone bring, like, a gross snack, or something." 

Emaline rolls her eyes. "Your friends are so weird," she says, with obvious fondness. "You sure they won't mind?"

"Oh, who cares what they think."  Kate glances around for a second,  then slips her hand into Emaline's and squeezes it gently. She feels shy about stuff like this: being cheesy and earnest and affectionate, when her mind is screaming at her to not act like a total dweeb. But Emaline looks at their entwined fingers with a smile so content that makes Kate's stomach flip over. "I really want you there," she adds. "Please?"

"Hmm." Emaline strokes the back of Kate's hand with her thumb for a moment, and when she glances back up her smile is gleaming with mischief. "You, me, and a house with no parents? I think I could be persuaded." 

"Yeah?"

Emaline laughs. "Yeah."

The bell rings again, which means both of them are now totally late. They let go of each other's hands, and Emaline digs the Walkman back out of her jacket pocket.

"Here," she says, handing the cassette player and headphones over to Kate. "Listen to it, okay? The third song especially. You'll love it, I promise." 

Kate nods. "See you after class." 

She watches Emaline leave and then turns and heads in the opposite direction, toward the AV production room. She can't help slipping the headphones on as she walks, hitting play on the tape deck and letting the music drown out the sound of students hurrying down the half-empty corridor. 

It makes Kate feel powerful, carrying this talisman of her girlfriend's around with her.  It makes her walk a little differently, with her head held higher and her footsteps more confident. 

She strides down the hallway exactly the way she's seen Emaline do it: like the place belongs to her.

Notes:

you can find me as on tumblr as camhowes.