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His first instinct, in a sad kind of way, is to go to Shiro, because it’s Shiro. That’s his hero. Shiro always knew what to do.
But he can’t go to Shiro, obviously. So his next instinct is to go to Hunk, because Hunk is his best friend, and also a genius, but Hunk trusts Shiro and Lance doesn’t want to ruin that. It’s the same reason why he doesn’t tell Pidge, or Allura, or Coran. Shiro is their leader, and he doesn’t want to plant that seed of doubt in their minds. He couldn’t risk throwing the team out of whack, not before he had more information, not with Lotor the Untrustworthy here.
That really only left one option.
Keith looked surprised, when he answered the call, to see only Lance.
“Hey,” he said warily. “What’s up?”
Lance shifted uncomfortably. “I need to talk to you.”
Keith looked confused. Lance couldn’t blame him. “About what?”
“About Shiro.”
He saw Keith immediately tense. “What about Shiro?”
“I have – questions. You know him best, right?”
Keith looked like he was thinking about a million different things. He nodded. “Send me your coordinates, and start thinking up an excuse for why you need to be on the Blade of Marmora ship.”
“What?”
“Get over here, Lance!”
“Right, right, okay, on it.”
When the call ended, he couldn’t help but feel a little vindicated. He had been right. Clearly something was going on.
“Lance,” he heard Allura say as he entered the control room. “The Marmora ship is here. Keith says you’re going aboard?”
“Uh, yeah,” he said, as if this was a totally normal thing that he and Keith did all the time. “He’s going to teach me how to sword fight.”
“Why?” Shiro asked. Lance found he couldn’t quite look him in the eye.
“My bayard is kind of a sword now,” he told him. “I figured Keith would be the best one to teach me.”
“Keith. Teach you.”
He found himself bristling, even though he would have said the exact same thing. “Yeah. It’ll be, like, a bonding moment.”
Shiro was looking at him like he didn’t quite trust him, but Lance was starting to look at Shiro the same way, so it was probably only fair.
“I guess it isn’t a problem,” Shiro finally said. “We can always call you if we need to.”
“Yeah, exactly,” he said, eager to get going. “And when I come back I’ll be even more skilled than I already am.” He made a mental note to actually ask Keith to show him a few moves.
“I think it’s a great idea,” Allura said. “We all miss Keith, but I know that you especially do.”
“Yeah, I – wait. What does that mean?”
“You and Keith were close. Always playing off each other, making each other better. And I know when Keith started to pilot the Black Lion you were of invaluable help to him.”
“Keith and I were not close! All we ever did was fight!”
“Like a kid pulling a girl’s pigtails on the school yard.”
He whirled on Pidge. “What does that mean?”
“Yes, what does that mean?” Allura echoed.
“You know exactly what it means,” Pidge said. To Allura she said, “It means Lance has a crush on Keith.”
“It does not! I do not!”
“Hm,” Allura said. “It does make sense, if you think about it.”
“It doesn’t make any sense! Don’t think about it!”
“Leave him alone,” Hunk said, and Lance turned towards him gratefully, but Hunk continued. “If he doesn’t want to admit it, give him some time.”
“You’re all traitors,” Lance said. “And you’re all wrong, and I’m not listening to this, and I’m leaving. Goodbye.”
Everyone laughed. Pidge cried out, “Give Keith a kiss for us!” When he turned around to flip her off, he noticed that Shiro was the only one not laughing.
They made eye contact. Lance was the first to look away.
He was so busy thinking about what the others had said and being annoyed at it that he barely even noticed the Marmora ship. The Galra who met him told him that Keith was in the control room with Krolia and that he would lead Lance there. He wasn’t sure if he was supposed to know who or what a Krolia was.
When he entered the room Keith was sitting down with his elbows on his knees, talking to a Galra who had her back to them, studying a hologram map of some place in the galaxy.
Keith was wearing his Blade of Marmora suit. Lance had a lot of complicated feelings about that suit, none of which he was willing to confront.
“Do you have to wear that suit all the time? Is that part of the code?”
Keith’s head dropped. “Hello, Lance.”
“Do you ever miss your ill-fitted jacket?”
“It wasn’t – it’s supposed to look like that!” He shook his head. “Whatever. We have a lot to talk about.”
Lance jerked his head at the other Galra, silently asking what the deal with that was. Keith sighed and started fidgeting.
“Lance, this is – Krolia.” He tripped over her name, as if he wasn’t sure what to call her. Lance wondered if she was some kind of royalty or something.
Krolia turned around and nodded at him. She was incredibly beautiful. Lance was secretly terrified of the Blade of Marmora, but he had his friends taunts fresh in his mind, and he wanted to feel like himself again. So he bowed and then said, “May I just say, you are absolutely the most –”
“Don’t you fucking dare.”
He stared at Keith in shock. He had never had an outburst like that. Sure, he had always seemed annoyed by Lance’s flirting, but everyone was annoyed at Lance’s flirting.
“Dude, what the hell? That was –”
“Hello, Lance,” Krolia interrupted. “I’m Keith’s mother.”
Lance froze. He looked between the two of them, realization of what he had just done dawning on him. “You – you’re – you mean –” He had just tried to flirt with Keith’s mother. “Oh fuck dude, I am so sorry.”
Keith rubbed his hands over his face.
“Seriously, buddy, I’m – Jesus, I never would have – although, you know, I can definitely see the resemblance. Yeah, definitely. But –” He turned back towards Krolia. “Uh, nice to meet you, ma’am. Your son is – well, he’s a pain in the ass, I’ll be honest, but very, um, brave –”
“Oh my God, Lance, shut the fuck up.”
“Right! Sorry! Shutting up!” He thought he might be sweating. He couldn’t stop looking between the two of them.
Keith stood up and walked over to Lance, standing in front of him and crossing his arms. “We need to discuss this. Tell me your suspicions.”
“Right. So, we got into this fight, as Voltron, and we ended up being trapped in this ball made of plants, and we couldn’t get out. So Allura suggested that we connect with our bayards, or something, and we ended up going to this weird astroplane, or something? And we were all there together, except for Shiro, but then Shiro showed up, and he kept calling out to me, like he needed to tell me something. So I asked Shiro when we got out of the astroplane thing, what he wanted to tell me, and he said he didn’t remember. He said he had blacked out when we all went there. But everyone else can remember. So why can’t Shiro remember? And what was the Shiro in the astroplane trying to tell me?”
Keith looked at him for a few intense moments before finally saying, “I don’t think that’s Shiro.”
Lance didn’t understand what he was talking about. “What do you mean?”
“I mean when he went missing, I don’t think it was Shiro who came back.”
“So who was it?”
Keith seemed to consider something, and then he said, “Have you ever heard any muttering about something called Operation Kuron?”
“Operation Kuron?”
Keith nodded. “That’s what we’ve heard from our soldiers stationed within the Galra army. We’re not sure exactly what it is, but we know it definitely has something to do with Shiro. The Blade of Marmora has been looking for him since I joined them. That’s – that’s why I joined,” he said, looking away. “I knew – Shiro is like my brother, and I couldn’t handle it anymore.”
“Why didn’t you tell us?”
“Because I didn’t want to jeopardize the team. I had somewhere to go – you guys didn’t. So I came here and we started our search. And I don’t think that this Shiro, or Kuron, or whatever, knows what he is, or isn’t. I think he’s just a pawn in Haggar’s plan. That’s why I still – I don’t want to kill him, and I don’t hate him, and during the crowning ceremony I still wanted to save him, because I don’t think he really knows. But I know Shiro. And something has been off.”
“He keeps complaining about a headache. Says he isn’t himself.”
“I think he might be some kind of clone. Some kind of… spy, or something.”
“Like a Trojan Horse.”
“What is a Trojan Horse?” Krolia spoke up for the first time. Keith didn’t answer, so Lance did.
“There’s this epic poem, back on earth. One of the most famous stories ever, about a war between the Greeks and the Trojans. At the end of the war the Greeks pretended that they were leaving, and they left this giant horse as a gift for the Trojans, and when the Trojans rolled it into their city, at night a bunch of Greeks poured out of the horse and sacked the city. It was hollow, see. They had tricked them.”
“That’s unhonourable,” Krolia said in horror. Keith made a small snorting noise, and Lance suddenly got the feeling he was in the middle of something.
“We think we’ve got a lead about where he might be. What did you tell the others about why you’re here?”
“I said you were teaching me to use a sword.”
“Why would I be doing that?”
“My bayard is kind of a sword, now. No big deal, or anything.” He tried not to sound too smug. Keith kind of cocked his head to the side.
“Really?”
Lance can’t quite read his expression. “Yes, really! Why is that so surprising?”
“It’s not. It’s pretty cool.”
“You think it’s cool? Seriously?”
“Sure. I can actually teach you how to use it. Since you told them, I mean.”
“I mean, I’m already pretty good. But I’m sure you have a few useful tips.”
Keith rolled his eyes.
Later, before he was about to head back to his ship, Keith stopped him.
“If we find him, we’re going to get him. I think you should come when we do.”
This surprised him. “Wait, really?”
Keith nodded. “I’d like – I’d like someone I really trust there. And I think it would help Shiro, too, if you’re there.”
Lance had a strange, warm feeling in his stomach.
“Yeah, I’ll be there. Definitely, dude.”
Keith nodded. “Okay. Good. I’ll keep in touch.” He turned to go, but Lance stopped him.
“Hey – can I ask? What’s going on with your mom?”
Keith tensed. “What about her?”
“There just seems to be some kind of… awkwardness. And anger, I guess.”
“I’m not talking about this with you.”
“You just told me that you trusted me!”
Keith’s fists clenched at his sides. “It’s fine. It’s fine. I found my mother and it’s fine and it doesn’t matter that she abandoned me so it’s fine. I’m fine. It’s fine!”
“Yeah, that sounds super convincing,” Lance said, not unkindly. “Look, I know you’re kind of… emotionally constipated, but I think you should –”
“It doesn’t matter,” Keith snapped. “I don’t care what you think, because it’s none of your business.”
Lance’s pity immediately turned to anger. “This is why – whatever.”
“No, finish that. This is why what?”
“This is why you’re always alone! Because you don’t accept help from anyone!”
“I don’t need help, especially not from you.”
Lance recoiled as if he had been slapped. “Fuck you,” he spat. Keith glared at him and then turned around and stalked away.
“Fuck,” Lance shouted once he had left. “I can’t believe they think I fucking like him.” He turned around to shoot one last glare in Keith’s direction.
And saw Krolia standing there.
“Um,” he said. He could see the resemblance even better now. Krolia was leaning against the door frame with her arms crossed and her hip jutted out. She looked so much like Keith that Lance felt the urge to either fight her or kiss her.
Fuck.
“Did you happen to hear that?”
She nodded. He wished she would say something.
“Can you not tell him?”
Krolia sighed. “Keith doesn’t really talk to me. It won’t be a problem.”
Lance wondered how he ended up getting in the middle of this family drama.
“I think maybe you just need to give him some time to adjust. I mean, he just found out he wasn’t completely human a couple months ago. Probably. I’ve kind of lost track of time without a sun.”
“I just don’t know how to talk to him.”
“Keith isn’t very good at talking.”
“Gets that from his father,” she said derisively. But then she seemed to wilt again. “I thought about him every single day,” she said quietly. Lance felt intensely uncomfortable.
“Maybe that’s just… not good enough, after so long.” He was kind of afraid that she was going to knife him. “It’s pretty psychologically scarring, I think.”
Krolia looked at the ground. “I didn’t want to leave. But there was a war, and –”
“I think you should be telling him this, not me.”
“If only he would talk to me.” She seemed to mutter this to herself. “I know I have a lot to atone for,” she said to him. “I just wish he would let me start.”
“Keith is kind of guarded,” Lance admitted. “Give it some time.”
“You know him well.”
“I mean. Not really. Kind of, I guess. Maybe.”
For the first time, Krolia smiled. She cocked her head to the side. “Do you like him?”
Lance sputtered. “No! Absolutely not!”
“Galra mate for life, you know.”
Lance made a noise that sounded vaguely like he was running out of air. “I have to go,” he said, in a voice about three octaves higher than it usually was. He heard a quiet laugh from Krolia as he hurried back to the pod.
“How was training?”
It took him a moment to remember what Shiro was talking about. Then he remembered that Keith had apparently been teaching him how to sword fight. “It was good. Tiring. Keith is – good. At swords. And fighting. Good at swords and fighting.”
Good at swords and fighting. Look, it wasn’t his fault. His mother always told him she would know if he were lying, so he’s not very good at it.
“Why don’t you show me what you learned?”
“Uh, maybe later? I’m pretty sore. I’m hurting in muscles I didn’t know I had.” He laughed nervously. God, he was bad at this.
“Okay. Maybe another time.”
“Definitely!” Shiro clapped him on the shoulder and then left. Lance swore.
“What now?” Keith looked understandably annoyed at Lance’s call, given how they had parted ways.
“We forgot to do any sword training. I need you to tell me everything you know about sword fighting.”
“It’s kind of a hands on experience, Lance.”
“I think Shiro suspects something. He keeps asking me to show him what I learned.”
Keith sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Just tell him you don’t want to face him until you learn some more, because you don’t want to embarrass yourself.”
Lance thought about this. “Oh. That’s a good idea. You’re much better at that than me.”
“At what?”
“Lying. My mother put the fear of God in me early on.” Keith looked away and Lance realized that mothers were a touchy subject with him. “Hey, listen, man. I’m sorry about earlier. It was none of my business.”
“No, I overreacted. You were just trying to… help. I shouldn’t have freaked out like that.”
“It’s cool. This is a big deal. I get it.”
“I just -" Keith looked like he was debating whether to finish this thought or not, but he ends up following through. “I don’t know how to act in this situation. I don’t know what having a mom means. And I’m mad at her. Really mad at her.” He suddenly glared at Lance. “You better not make a joke about this.”
“I would never!” Lance said, affronted. “Look, I know you’re not good at talking-"
“I believe your exact words were emotionally constipated.”
Lance laughed. “Yeah. God, I’m funny. But anyway – you gotta talk to her, man. It’s the only way to sort this thing out.”
Keith didn’t look too thrilled about this. “I guess.” Then he suddenly smiled at Lance. “Thanks. I’ll call you when we know something.”
Lance blinked. He cleared his throat. Tried to remember how to form words. “Yeah, cool,” he managed to say. Keith ended the call and Lance looked at the space where his face had been, that rare, genuine smile seemingly burned into his brain.
“Oh fuck,” he said.
He goes through the next week or so combing over every interaction he and Keith had ever had, trying to figure out where the hell this thing started. But he can’t figure out when his feelings of annoyance and rivalry turned into this mess. So he decided to go to Hunk. This, at least, he could talk to his best friend about.
“Hey Hunk.”
“Yeah.”
“I need to talk to you about something, but I need you to swear to secrecy, okay?”
Hunk looked up from where he was attempting to make another batch of space cookies. “Okay. I can keep a secret.”
Lance took a breath. He knew Hunk wouldn’t make fun of him, but it was still embarrassing. “I think I might like Keith.”
“Yeah dude, we know.”
“Sure, but I didn’t know!”
Hunk looked at him. “Wait, seriously? I thought you were just playing dumb.”
“You should know me well enough to know I am never playing dumb! It’s all genuine!” Lance slumped against the counter. “When did I start liking him?”
“Why are you asking me?”
“Because I don’t know! I’ve been trying to figure it out but I can’t!”
Hunk put the cookies in the oven. “I’ve known from the beginning.”
Lance brightened. “So you know when it started? When was it?”
“I mean the beginning, beginning. It’s been going on from the moment you met him.”
Lance’s jaw dropped. “That is so not true.”
“You literally were able to recognize him from the back of his head, dude.”
“Because of his hair! He has stupid hair!”
Hunk gave him a patient look. “Yeah. Which you mention all the time. It was like that all the time at the Garrison, Keith this and Keith that. Pidge and I made a bet on when you’d finally admit it.”
“Wait, seriously?”
Hunk nodded. “She won. I didn’t think you’d be this much in denial.”
Lance shook his head. “From the beginning? There’s no way.”
“Hey, I could be wrong. I don’t know your feelings.”
But he was pretty sure Hunk wasn’t wrong. He thought about how in every class he had, he would immediately seek out Keith. He thought about the rivalry that was pretty much all in his head. He thought about how upset he had been when Keith got expelled, even though it meant Lance got to move up a pilot class. He had thought he was just upset because now he could never prove he was better than Keith, but maybe –
“Oh my God. I’ve liked Keith since the beginning.”
Hunk patted him on the back reassuringly. “There. Doesn’t it feel better to admit it?”
“No! It doesn't! Because it’s Keith! He has stupid hair and he’s reckless and impulsive and he left and, and he has stupid hair!”
“You mentioned that already. Are you mad at him because he left?”
“No! Maybe. I don’t know. I don’t know anything anymore.”
“It’s not the end of the world, Lance. It’s just a crush.”
He didn’t know how to explain to Hunk that having a crush on Keith was the very definition of the end of the world, so instead he just thunked his head down on the counter and said, “When will those cookies be ready?”
“Soon, buddy.” Hunk rubbed circles on his back. “Very soon.”
Lance was so busy having a crisis that he almost forgot how this whole thing had started until Allura called him down to the control room and told him the Marmora ship was here. “More training?”
Lance’s stomach tightened. Keith hadn’t called, he had just shown up, which had to mean –
“Uh, yeah. I better get going.” He had a sudden thought and turned to Allura again. “I might spend a couple of days there. Really get in a lot of practice.”
Allura smiled at him, and he knew exactly what she was thinking. “Of course. If there is an emergency we will contact you. We'd be lost without you, after all.”
Lance kind of felt like he was glowing. “Thanks, Princess. I uh, better go.”
She nodded. He had to stop himself from running to the pod, so eager to get to the ship.
As soon as he boarded, Keith was there.
“What happened?” Lance asked. Keith was very pale.
“We found him. Or we think we did. It’s going to he dangerous, though. You still in?”
Lance didn’t even hesitate. “Of course. Let’s go save Shiro.”
Keith gave him an appreciative look. Lance felt butterflies erupt in his stomach. Not now, he scolded himself. We have more important things to deal with.
When they got to Keith’s ship Krolia was already waiting there. He shot Keith a look, but he was too focused to even notice. So he looked at Krolia instead, who kind of shrugged. He made a mental note to ask her later.
“Let’s go. Kolivan and the others will be there as back up, but it’s mostly on us.”
“Do we know where he is?”
“He’s on a Galra ship right on the outskirts of their territory. It’s disguised as a security checkpoint.”
“Do we know where in the ship he is?”
Keith flipped a bunch of switches on the console. “Medical bay,” he said tightly. Lance's stomach seemed to tighten even more.
“Okay,” he said. “I’m ready when you are."
Keith gave him a long look.
And then they went.
“One of our informants was able to get close enough to Haggar to get this information,” Krolia said as they were flying. “He didn’t make it out, so let’s hope he didn’t die in vain.”
“Should have known this was Haggar's idea,” Lance said angrily.
“It was an incredibly secret operation,” Krolia said. “Very few knew about it. We're pretty sure she replaced your Shiro with a clone, and is using him to spy on Voltron.”
Lance’s fists clenched. He thought of Shiro, being held prisoner, possibly being tortured, holding out hope that they were looking for him. And they hadn’t been. They had left him.
“They’re going to pay for this,” Keith said quietly. It was the first time he had spoken since they took off. Lance wanted to comfort him somehow, but he was just as scared, just as angry.
“We'll get him,” is all he said.
A ship with a secret was guaranteed to have good security, and a ship posing as a security check point had to have precautions in place, so it took them awhile to find an opening. As they landed, Lance suddenly had a horrible idea.
“Keith,” he said hoarsely, “What if he’s not… what if they didn’t keep him alive?”
“They did,” he answered, although Lance had a feeling that this was more wishful thinking than anything. He shot a look at Lance's broadsword. “I should have taught you how to use that like I said.”
“I’ve got the basics down. Swing at things. Hit them with the pointy end. Besides, it can probably turn back into a gun if I need it to. Probably.”
They locked eyes. “Ready?” Keith asked. Lance had a sudden desire to tell him how he felt, in case this was his last chance, but he knew Keith had to be completely focused. So instead he just nodded.
They opted for stealth, rather than mowing down every stinking Galra who got in their way, which was what Lance wanted to do. The reasoning was they would probably have to do that on the way out, and they wanted to remain undetected for as long as possible. Lance begrudgingly agreed that this made sense, no matter how angry he was at the bastards.
As it were, they still had to take down the two guards who were stationed outside the Medical Bay. Lance felt great satisfaction as they dropped. He wasn’t normally like this, but he couldn’t stop thinking about how long it had been, how they had abandoned Shiro without even knowing it, and he felt no remorse.
Krolia inputted some code into the door and it slid open. Some higher power just have been on their side, because there was no one inside.
Just Shiro.
Lance faltered by the door, but Keith ran forward immediately. “Shiro,” he said, and Lance was surprised to hear a barely contained sob in his voice. “Shiro, it’s me. Wake up.”
Just like before, Lance thought. The two of them saving Shiro, the way this whole thing had started. He took a few tentative steps forward, fingers gripping his sword so tightly he was beginning to lose feeling in them.
“Is he –”
“He’s alive, but he’s out. Fuck, Shiro, come on.”
Krolia stepped forward. “We will just have to take him like this. We don’t have time to wait for him to awaken.”
“And how are we supposed to take him, exactly?” Keith asked. He was gripping Shiro’s ragged clothes, as if he were afraid he would slip away if Keith let go.
Krolia didn’t answer – she just walked over to where they were and in one smooth movement lifted Shiro fireman style over his shoulder, as if he weighed nothing at all.
“That works,” Lance said. Keith looked less than happy about this turn of events, but he didn’t say anything about it.
“We'll go ahead,” he said, nodding at Lance. “We'll take down any Galra in the way.”
And just like that, they were out of there. Lance was just thinking that this wasn’t as dangerous as he had been fearing when a Galra soldier stepped out from behind a wall, looked at them in shock, and then reached for some kind of communicator on his waist.
Keith moved faster than Lance had ever seen, striking out and hitting the communicator out of his hand. Lance made a grab for it, slicing it with his sword to ensure it couldn’t be used again. When he looked back Keith and the Galra were fighting tooth and nail, and Lance was momentarily frozen, unsure if he should intervene or if it would throw Keith off balance, when he saw a flash of a sword as it embedded itself in Keith’s shoulder.
Keith let out a scream of pain, and behind them Krolia let out a choked sound. Lance swore, sliced at the back of the Galra’s knees, then stabbed him in the back as he fell. He rushed over to where Keith was leaning against the wall, clutching his shoulder.
“Are you okay?”
“Peachy fucking keen,” Keith said through gritted teeth, which was a fair response, Lance thought, to a really stupid question.
“Keith –” Krolia started, but Keith shook his head.
“Let’s go. We don’t have a lot of time.”
Lance exchanged worried glances with Krolia, but he knew there was nothing he could do. Keith was right. They had to get out of here.
“Stay behind me,” Lance said to him. “I’ll deal with any Galra we see. Keep pressure on that wound.”
Keith didn’t even argue. That was worrisome.
With Shiro unconscious and Keith bleeding out behind him, Lance was on high alert as they made their way back to the ship. They had almost made it when they had heard a shout and saw three soldiers coming at them.
“Get on the ship,” Lance told them. Keith made an unhappy noise.
“You’re outnumbered.”
“And you’re bleeding. I will hold them off while you two get to the ship, but they will catch up to you. Fucking go, Keith!”
Keith looked like he wanted to argue, but he did as he was told, for once. Krolia followed after him immediately, Shiro’s head bouncing on her back. Lance turned back to the advancing Galra, heart in his throat.
He held his sword in front of him. Took a breath.
The first swing sent shockwaves up his arms. The other two tried to escape past him towards the ship, but he sidestepped away from the first and swung at the others, catching one of them in the arm. He swore and clutched at it, hate burning in his eyes.
Keith was right. He was outnumbered. He wasn’t so concerned about fighting them as not being able to stop them from getting to the ship. Getting to Shiro. To Keith.
A shot came from behind him and sent one of the Galra down.
“Come on,” he heard Krolia shout. He turned and ran, faster than he had ever run in his life, door clanging shut behind him. “Fly us out of here.”
“Why me?”
“Keith told me you were a great pilot. You’ll be able to get us out of here better than me.”
“He said that?”
Krolia glared. “Not the time, Lance.”
“Right, right.” He sat in the pilot's seat and surveyed the controls. He could do this. “Fly the ship, Lance,” he muttered to himself.
He did.
When they were in the clear, Lance let out what felt like the first breath he had taken in ages. He could hear Krolia fussing over Keith in the back; dimly he could hear him shout, “I’m fine, Mom, leave it!” A few ticks later Krolia took a seat next to him.
“Why are you smiling like that?” He asked worriedly. The smile did not fade.
“That’s the first time he’s called me Mom,” she said quietly. Lance decided not to mention that Keith had also basically told her to fuck off. He'd let her have this.
“If you want to go back there, I can take it from here,” she said. Lance nodded and Krolia took his place.
Keith was sitting in the back of the ship beside Shiro. Lance took a seat next to him. “How is it?”
“It’s fine. It’s not that big a deal.”
“Stab wounds actually fit rather neatly in the big deal category for most people.”
“It’s fine. You’re worse than Krolia.”
Lance looked at Shiro's sleeping form. He was thin, gaunt. His skin was sallow, the scar across his nose even more noticeable.
“I think they injected him with something,” Keith said quietly. “We just have to wait for it to wear off.”
“I told the others I’d be here for a couple days.”
“That was a good idea. Guess you’re not as bad at lying as you think.”
They sat in silence for a few moments, each watching the steady rise and fall of Shiro's chest. Lance finally broke the silence.
“At least it’s not your fault.”
“What?”
“Your hair. It’s obviously genetic. I mean, who has a rat tail? You never stood a chance.”
Keith let out a surprised laugh, shoving Lance playfully. “Jackass. There’s nothing wrong with my hair.”
“You and your mom could start a really bad 1980s tribute band.”
Keith shook his head. “I don’t think bad hair is genetic.”
“It’s got to be. The only other option is that you chose this, and I can’t live with that thought.”
“You talk an awful lot about my hair for someone who claims to hate it.”
Lance heard the echo of Hunk’s voice in his head - which you mention all the time. It was like that all the time at the Garrison, Keith this and Keith that.
Luckily, he is spared from having to answer that by Krolia.
“Our medic will meet us and will take Shiro immediately to assess any damage done. Keith, you go too, and don’t even try to argue.”
Miraculously, Keith didn’t. Lance thought that Krolia would probably get along well with his mother.
“And for the record, I can hear you. If you’re going to talk about my hair, at least do it quietly.”
Lance opened his mouth to do – something, apologize or beg for mercy from this weird, knife wielding family with bad hair, when Keith lets out the softest laugh, and then slumped against Lance.
“We got him,” he said quietly. “We got him back.”
Lance couldn’t help but look at Shiro’s unconscious form and wonder if maybe they hadn’t been too late.
As soon as Keith took a step, he almost fell over. Lance lunged forward and grabbed him before he could hit the ground.
“Jesus Christ,” he muttered, as Keith leaned entirely on him. He had an arm around Lance’s neck and Lance was holding him up around the waist.
Those Blade of Marmora suits really left nothing to the imagination.
“I thought you said you would take care of this,” Krolia said. Her fingers kept twitching at her side, as if she wanted to reach out and touch Keith but wasn’t sure if she should.
Lance made a decision.
“You take him,” he said to Krolia. “You’re stronger than me.” He handed Keith rather unceremoniously over to her. She narrowed her eyes at Lance, as if she weren’t entirely certain what game he was playing at.
“I’ll stay with Shiro,” he said, ignoring Krolia’s gaze. “In case he wakes up.”
So that’s what he did. He followed the ship medic as he took Shiro – this time on a table, not slung over a shoulder – into a hospital like room. To be honest, Lance was a little surprised that the Blade of Marmora even had a medic. He had kind of thought that if you were sick or injured they just took you out the back and got rid of you, like a lame horse or a dog with rabies. But he wasn’t about to mention that, not to Keith, and certainly not to the doctor who was in charge of fixing up his hero.
The doctor in question was hooking Shiro up to a bunch of machines, and poking him with things, and doing a bunch of other tests.
“Uh, excuse me – not that I’m questioning your methods, because I’m sure your medicine is very advanced and we don’t even have a cure for the common cold yet, but – why don’t you just put him in a healing pod?”
The doctor gave him a look that he was used to receiving from instructors – it was a look that said just shut up and let me do my job.
But the doctor answered him anyway. “Healing pods are not magic. They can certainly help if you know what you’re doing, or if you have a clear understanding of what is wrong with your patient. But sometimes there is only so much that it can do. Sometimes the only thing that can truly fix someone is time.”
“That’s, uh – strangely poetic. So then what’s wrong with Shiro? Does he need to go into a healing pod or is this a time thing?”
“There is nothing… seriously wrong with your friend. He is underfed, and there is likely atrophying of his muscles, but overall, physically, there seems to be no lasting damage.”
“That sounds like a good thing, and yet you’re all over there being Mr. Doom and Gloom.”
The doctor studied him seriously. “Your friend was held prisoner by the Empire for a long time and appears to suffer no severe physical ailments. The last time they had him, they did this.” He gestures at Shiro’s arm. “So if they weren’t torturing him, what were they doing to him? Why did they need him alive?”
Lance felt like his lungs were being filled with water.
“I can assure you that your friend will be fine, physically. I cannot make the same promise about his mental state. I have him hooked up to an IV that will give him nutrition, but other than that there is not much I can do. I have given him something to try and clear out whatever sedative they have used on him. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I should go attend to Keith.”
He left Lance standing there, staring in horror at Shiro. Guilt wracked his body, a physical sensation that felt so real he wouldn’t be surprised to find bruises. He almost tripped over his feet trying to get to the bed. There was a stool in the corner, and Lance hauled it over to Shiro’s side.
“Shiro,” he said, voice cracking. “I don’t know if this is one of those things where you’re unconscious but you can still hear me, but if it is – I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I’m sorry we left you there, with them, again, and I don’t know what else they did to you, but – we failed you. All of us, except Keith, of course, because he knew, he always knew, but we should have known, too. I’m sorry, Shiro.” He rested his head in his hands, elbows on the bed beside Shiro, and willed himself not to cry.
“Hey.”
He turned around, wiping at his face. He didn’t want Keith to see him crying.
“Hey. How’s your shoulder?”
Keith shrugged, but Lance noticed that he only did so with his non-injured shoulder.
“I’ll live,” was his answer. Lance could tell by the awkward silence that followed that Keith had heard what he had said to Shiro. “The medic told me about Shiro. About what’s wrong and what… isn’t.”
Lance swallowed. He needed Keith to… to tell him it would be okay, or something. He couldn’t look away from Shiro’s colourless face.
“Shiro is tough,” Keith said. He had grabbed another chair from somewhere and pulled it up beside Lance. “He’s lived through hell already and made it the first time. He doesn’t fold easily.”
“Everyone has a breaking point,” Lance said quietly.
“Even if that’s the case – it’s not your fault. If you knew he was out there you would have been looking.”
“You knew,” Lance said, not accusingly or anything. Just fact. “The whole time you knew. Why didn’t you say anything?”
“Would you have believed me?”
Lance was about to say yes, of course, but he stopped. If it came down to it, Keith or Shiro, who would they have believed?
Shiro. Every time.
“I’m sorry,” Lance said. “For making you do this alone.”
“Look, I get… I get the whole allure of Shiro. He’s everyone’s hero, and it’s easy to idolize him when you’ve never seen him get food poisoning or get so drunk he spills red wine all over himself and then cries about it.”
“He didn’t do that.”
“His 21st birthday. I was fifteen and had to take his car to drive him to the store so he could buy more, even though I didn’t have a goddamn license.”
Lance looked at Shiro. “No frigging way.”
“What I’m trying to say is it’s easy, when that’s the only version you know, to miss the warning signs. The differences, subtle as they may be. So I don’t blame you guys. Obviously you would believe Shiro over me. I would believe Shiro over me. It’s not you’re fault that you only know one version of him.”
Lance considered this. “Where did he get the food poisoning from?”
“You know that taco truck they used to have at the Garrison?”
“That’s been shut down for ages!”
“Yeah, now you know why.”
Lance smiled the slightest bit. “Thanks, man. You’ve gotten better at this. It’s almost like you took an emotional laxative, or something.”
Keith rubbed his hand over his face. “Please stop calling me constipated.”
Lance bumped him lightly with his shoulder, but when he moved away Keith followed him, keeping their shoulders together. He was wearing his normal clothes again, minus the jacket.
“Thanks for coming, today,” Keith said nervously. “We would have been fucked without you.”
Lance can’t help the warm glow he felt at Keith’s praise. “Thanks for trusting me.”
“Why wouldn't I?” Keith asked, sounding genuinely confused. “You’re my teammate. I’ve put my life in your hands before.”
“I guess. I just – I don’t know. I guess I always assumed you didn’t like me.”
“Why?” Keith asked incredulously. “Because of that made up rivalry thing?”
“It wasn’t made up! Just because you were first in the class and didn’t even notice me doesn’t mean it wasn’t a real rivalry.”
“I noticed you,” Keith said. Lance hadn’t been expecting that.
“What?”
“You were a good pilot, Lance. Of course I noticed you.”
He remembered what Krolia had said – Keith said you were a great pilot.
“Okay, well, you’re always saying mean stuff to me! Like, like – like I’ll stick you in a wormhole!”
“I’m pretty sure those were your words,” Keith said drily. “But I noticed you.”
Lance turned his head. Keith was looking at him, gaze intense. Lance was surprised to see there were yellow specks in his eyes. Like his Galra heritage was shining through. He wouldn’t tell Keith, because Keith would likely be upset, but honestly Lance found it kind of attractive.
He moved closer, the littlest bit, barely noticeable.
Keith did the same.
Lance’s heart was beating in his throat. He was pretty sure that’s not where it was supposed to be, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. They kept at this, moving closer and closer, achingly slow, until they were nose to nose. Keith angled his head and closed his eyes. Lance did the same.
And then –
A cough, a moan, and a strangled cry.
Keith wrenched away as if he had been burned. “Shiro,” he said, standing up and leaning over the bed. Shiro’s eyes were wide, and for one brief, terrifying moment, he seemed not to recognize Keith. But Keith put his hands on Shiro’s shoulders, holding him still.
“Hey, it’s okay,” Keith said, and his voice was softer and more soothing than Lance had ever heard. “You’re safe, Shiro, it’s me.”
Shiro was clutching Keith’s biceps hard enough that his fingers were turning white, but Keith didn’t flinch. “Keith,” he said, and his voice was hoarse. Lance didn’t know if that was from disuse or from screaming.
Shiro’s eyes flicked side to side and finally registered Lance, sitting there like he was frozen.
“Lance,” he said, and his voice was filled with so much relief that Lance felt tears spring to eyes.
Then he sat up – Keith moved back, giving him space – and threw up all over them.
Keith sprang up and swore rather creatively. Shiro looked horrified, apologizing over and over. Lance just kind of sat there shocked. He was no stranger to being thrown up on – baby siblings, baby cousins, his aunt the Christmas she turned 40 and couldn’t handle it – but there was something very surreal about being projectile vomited on by the man you’ve idolized for so long.
“Fuck,” Keith said.
“Oh yeah.” Lance’s voice sounded strange to his ears. “The doctor said he had given him something to clear out whatever sedative was in his body.”
Keith turned on him. “A little warning would have been nice!”
“I didn’t know that’s how it would clear out!”
Keith made a frustrated noise that sounded suspiciously like a growl.
“I’m sorry,” Shiro said abashedly. “You guys should go clean up.”
“We’re not leaving,” Keith said. Lance was glad he had been included in that.
“I’m fine,” Shiro said, which was the most blatant lie Lance had ever heard, and he had once told a girl he was descended from royalty in an attempt to impress her (it hadn’t worked). “I swear. I know where I am, and I know that no one here will harm me,” he said quietly.
“You don’t always have to be strong, you know.”
“I know. I really am okay.”
Keith clearly was not buying this. “Lance can go, and then when he comes back I’ll go –”
“Keith. I mean it. I’m not… I’m not tied down, or drugged, and I assume this is just food or something,” he said, pointing at the needle in his arm. Lance nodded. “Now that I know –” His voice cracked. He cleared his throat and tried again. “Now that I know I’m here, with people I trust, it’s okay, I promise.”
“Shiro…”
“Okay, listen, I’ll be honest, yes, I’m still freaked out, but you both smell really, really bad.”
Keith smiled in a way that showed he wasn’t happy about it. “Do you want me to send the medic in or do you want to wait?” Until we’re here with you, was the unspoken end of that sentence, and Shiro’s nod confirmed Lance’s suspicions that he wasn’t nearly as okay as he said.
“We’ll be back as fast as we can,” Keith said, squeezing Shiro’s shoulder.
When they left the med bay Lance let out a breath he hadn’t known he was holding, and Keith wrinkled his nose. “We really do smell.”
“Uh, where am I supposed to shower?”
Keith apparently hadn’t considered this. “Um, you’ll have to use my room, I guess,” he finally said. “I’ll use Krolia’s.”
“Okay. Thanks. Have you happened to talk to her yet?”
Keith shook his head. “I am not discussing this while I am covered in vomit.”
That sounded a lot like an excuse to Lance but he didn’t say anything. It was a touchy subject; he understood.
Keith showed Lance his room and then headed off. The lights flicked on as soon as Lance entered.
The room was spotless. Keith’s bed was made, corners so tight it would have made Iverson cream. There was nothing that looked like any kind of personal effect; just his jacket, hung up beside the door. Lance had the urge to start looking through drawers, but he wasn’t about to be that guy.
There were a stack of towels in the bathroom, but as Lance was taking off his armor he realized he didn’t have anything else to wear.
Shit.
He wrapped a towel around his waist and went back out into Keith’s room. He opened one of the drawers and got lucky – there were some shirts in there, all black, of course, he shouldn’t be surprised. The next drawer he opened revealed a bunch of extra Blade of Marmora suits – Lance was really going to have to confront his feelings about that suit eventually – but the one after revealed a pair of sweatpants. Lance had never seen Keith wear sweats. He wondered where they had come from. Did the Galra wear sweatpants?
Whatever, it wasn’t important. Lance grabbed them and headed back into the bathroom.
The water was nice and hot, and Lance took longer than usual, enjoying the warmth, scrubbing at his skin until he couldn’t remember the feel of vomit anymore. He had a brief crisis when he used Keith’s shampoo, the scent overwhelming him, because this was Keith’s shampoo, and Keith’s shower, and he was going to be wearing Keith’s clothes. But he told himself he was being an idiot, which he was, and to smarten up.
When he got out of the shower he dried himself off, feeling delightfully clean. He pulled on Keith’s clothes. The shirt was a little snugger than he was used to, but the pants fit fine. Then he looked at himself in the mirror. It was strange, seeing himself in Keith’s clothes. He found a comb, plucked a couple black hairs out of it, then ran it through his hair.
When he came out of the bathroom, Keith was sitting on the bed, shirtless. It looked like he was trying to rebandage his shoulder.
He looked up when Lance came out. “You’re wearing my clothes,” he said in a strange voice.
And you’re not wearing any, Lance thought. Somehow the voice in his head was just as shrill and high pitched as he imagined his real voice would be if he spoke aloud.
“I wasn’t about to put vomit covered clothes back on,” he said, once he trusted that he could speak without sounding like a teenage girl.
“You went through my drawers?”
“Where else was I supposed to find clothes? Don’t worry, I didn’t find anything weird, or, like, naked pictures women, or anything.”
“I don’t have anything like that! And anyway, they wouldn’t be –” He cut off abruptly.
“They wouldn’t be what?”
“Nothing.”
“I mean, you don’t have to tell me,” Lance said, even though he really wanted to know. “I was just –”
“Women!” Keith blurted out. “They wouldn’t be women!”
Lance was suddenly transported to twenty minutes ago, when he and Keith had been about to kiss, and realized, with extreme clarity, that he was a fucking idiot.
“Right,” he said. “Right, that makes – yeah. That’s… that’s cool.”
“You’re an idiot,” Keith said, but it sounded almost affectionate.
“Yeah I am.” He watched for a moment longer and then said, “Let me do that.”
“Let you do what?”
“Your shoulder.”
Keith looked like he wanted to argue, but instead he just sighed and nodded. His skin was smooth, still slightly wet from the shower; Lance thought that he heard a slight intake of breath when his fingers grazed Keith’s arm, but he might have just imagined it.
“Where did you learn how to do this?”
“My younger sister,” Lance said softly, reverently. “She was a goddamn menace. Always climbing trees, jumping over fences, starting fights with boys. Real badass stuff, unless you were my mother, in which case it was horrifying. So I made my sister a deal that if she always told me if something was wrong, I wouldn’t tell our mom.”
“That was nice of you.”
“Well, I didn’t want her getting tetanus or something and never telling anyone because she was afraid of getting in trouble.”
“Still.” Keith’s voice was barely more than a whisper.
“Well,” was all he managed to say, annoyed to feel his cheeks heat up. “I guess.”
Keith was quiet and still beneath him as he tended to the injury. Lance had a strong desire to press his lips to the junction where Keith’s neck met his shoulder. He fought the urge.
“We should talk about it,” Keith suddenly said.
“Should we?”
Keith snorted. “Now who’s emotionally constipated?”
It wasn’t that. It was just that this was Keith, and Lance was having a very hard time reconciling the feelings he thought he had for Keith – jealousy, annoyance, begrudging friendliness – with the overwhelming desire to push him backwards onto the bed and climb on top of him. And any confidence he had happened to be feeling before had fled in the wake of Shiro waking up, and anyway, there was no reason that Keith would like him, because Keith was Keith, he was fierce and beautiful and –
“Lance,” he said softly, breaking Lance out of his thoughts. “You’re digging your nails into my skin.”
Lance released him. “Shit, I’m sorry,” he said, looking in shame at the half moon’s embedded on Keith’s skin. “I didn’t mean –”
“It’s fine.” Lance finished up with the wrapping and was just about to move away when Keith said, “I heard what you were saying to my mom, before.”
He felt suddenly very cold. “About what?” He asked, but he wasn’t nearly calm enough to convince anyone that he didn’t know exactly what Keith was talking about.
“You don’t have to…” Keith trailed off. Lance still had a hand on his shoulder. “I just mean – oh, fuck it,” he said, and then he leaned forward and kissed Lance.
For a brief moment Lance had no idea what was happening, but as soon as he caught up he brought a hand up to tangle in Keith’s hair, and had a sudden epiphany that he had wanted to do this for a while. Keith’s lips were softer than Lance had ever imagined, and they opened slightly as he caved into Lance.
They pulled away reluctantly.
“We have to get back,” Keith said. Lance nodded, hand still playing with Keith’s hair.
“Yeah,” he said, but he leaned forward to plant one more kiss on the corner of Keith’s mouth. “Come on.”
Keith smiled at him, a smile that was soft and warm, and Lance felt, for the first time since Keith had left Voltron, that things were okay again.
“All right,” Shiro said the next day. He had been released from the med bay and was standing in front of them wearing borrowed clothes from one of the Blades who was close to him in size. “We need to talk.”
Keith and Lance looked at each other, unsure what it was about.
“You,” Shiro said, pointing at Lance. “Did not fail me.” Lance’s eyes widened.
“I didn’t think you could hear me.”
“Well, I did, and it’s a ridiculous notion. You didn’t fail me, none of you did. You’re not a failure, Lance. You had a hunch and you followed it through because your instincts are good. I’m grateful to have you.”
Lance smiled. The other Shiro’s criticisms felt like nothing to him now, now that he had the real Shiro, his Shiro, sitting here and telling him what he had been aching to hear for so long.
“And you,” Shiro said, pointing an accusatory finger at Keith. “We made a pact never to mention my 21st birthday again.”
Keith let out a surprised laugh. “It wasn’t a pact, you woke up the next morning hungover and begged me never to mention it again, but I never agreed.”
“Your betrayal stings,” Shiro said. Lance wanted to laugh and cry and hug them both. It felt like he had been living in darkness for so long, and now for the first time he was seeing the sun, feeling warmth on his skin. Shiro smiled at him, and as they walked to the dining hall Keith slipped a hand into Lance’s, and he felt good.
“Don’t say anything,” Keith said. “Not until we figure out what to do.”
“I know. You’ve told me fifteen times already.”
Lance was heading back to the Castle; it would be suspicious if he were gone for too long, and they didn’t want Kuron, which was what they had started calling fake Shiro, to start suspecting anything. Shiro agreed that he likely didn’t know he wasn’t the real thing, but the fact remained that they had no idea what his purpose was, if he was there as some sort of spy, or if he was a ticking bomb about to go off. They had to deal with this carefully, but they wanted to give Shiro more time. He was still shaken. So Lance was going back, and he would keep an eye on things, and then, when Shiro was ready, they would figure out what to do.
None of them knew how it would work out, but Lance couldn’t help but feel like it would be okay. He had that feeling around Shiro, like everything would work out.
“And you need to act normal.”
“I know, Keith. Don’t worry, I once played Tree #3 in my middle school play, I’m a great actor.”
Keith rolled his eyes, but his mouth curved up in a smile. Lance couldn’t help but lean forward to kiss it.
“This is serious. I don’t think being Tree #3 is going to cut it,” Keith said when they separated, but Lance moved closer, pulling Keith in close and kissing him silent.
“You only say that because you never saw my performance. My mother said I was the best tree up there.”
Keith laughed into his mouth. “Your mother is contractually obligated to say that.”
“Speaking of.”
“Don’t talk about my mother when you’re kissing me,” Keith said firmly, which seemed like a fair rule.
Someone cleared their throat.
“See? You summoned her,” Keith said irritably when they pulled apart to see Krolia standing there.
“That’s what mom’s do. Get in the way.”
“Again, I can hear you. I’m standing right here.”
Lance smiled sheepishly and stepped away. “Keith was – choking. I was giving him mouth to mouth.”
Krolia rolled her eyes, and she looked so much like Keith that Lance was almost awestruck.
“I just wanted to say goodbye. And thank you. For your help.”
“No problem,” Lance said. “I’m used to being needed. I’m pretty much the star of our team – ow!” Keith had pinched him. Lance pinched him back, and then jerked his head meaningfully at Krolia. Keith glared. Lance stared back. Keith sighed.
“Mom, could we… talk? After?”
Krolia bit her lip. Lance got the feeling she was doing it to keep herself from grinning. “Of course. I’ll wait outside.”
After she left, Keith glared at Lance. “You’re nosy.”
“And you’re –”
“Emotionally constipated, I know.” Keith kissed him again, fingers curling around Lance’s bicep. “Remember to act normal. Tree #3 taken to the extreme.”
“Don’t worry,” Lance said, bringing his hands up to Keith’s face. “Keep me updated.”
“I will.” One last kiss, and then another for good measure. Lance didn’t know what he was going to do back on his ship, without Keith there to kiss and annoy.
Keith gave him one last parting smile before leaving, and just before Lance boarded the pod that would take him back to the others, he heard the two of them outside the door.
“Galra mate for life, you know."
“Mom!”