Chapter Text
Another icy breeze whistled through the cavernous dining hall, making James Kirk - captain and notorious tough-guy - fight to make his shivers inconspicuous. In order to maintain a measure of decorum, Starfleet insisted he wear a coat that was not bulky, and as a result donned a trench coat that did nothing to keep out the frigid temperature.
He and his diplomatic entourage were on Aran VI - a planet in the midst of an ice-house climate - for two days. The inhabitants, who called themselves Asseens, were ape-like with heavy pale-blue fur and thick hides. Although there appeared to be a glut of building material, their largest and most intricate structures were made of solid ice, thereby making it impossible to bring extra heating elements lest they ruin the structure. Thankfully the furniture was built of a heat-absorbing lumber, but this was only a minor comfort.
Pursing his lips, Kirk looked to his side to observe his ship's doctor taking small sips of his wine and constantly licking his chapped lips. Due to the medical needs of this new Federation planet, a doctor's presence was required, but Bones certainly let his opinion be known about having to spend three days in the "goddam Yukon tundra" with no heat. Even now, while the man talked to an Asseen with a medical sash across his chest, Bones had an ever present scowl. Kirk could almost hear his inner monologue about getting off this hunk of ice and into the ship's hot tub.
Kirk then turned his attention to his Vulcan First Officer, one who he had much more concern for. Spock was a stiff man in everyday life, but today he was practically a statue. The native scientists had given up talking to him due to his refusal to say more than three word sentences. The Asseens might have thought it rude, but Kirk knew better. Spock was unable to speak without his teeth chattering and voice wavering - an embarrassment he could not stand to endure in front of a race who had never met a Vulcan.
Although used to warmer climates, Spock insisted on not wearing a coat. He relied on two layers of thermals under his shirt and pants. Kirk still could not understand why Spock could not simply wear some warmer clothes and lessen the embarrassment of his shivering. However, Kirk knew the exact response he would get.
"Captain, Vulcans have full control of our body functions. I will no doubt be able to compensate for the lesser temperature. Wearing a heavy coat unnecessary, cumbersome, and will decrease reaction time were something to go awry. "
"C'mon, Spock. You've worn environmental suits before for spacewalks. Those are ten times as cumbersome as any winter wear and you do fine."
"'Fine' is not a standard I wish to follow, particularly when we are attempting to establish diplomatic relations. The space suits are necessary for survival in a vacuum, so they are unavoidable during an EVA. Clothing for cold weather is a far more flexible choice. As I said, Captain, I can easily regulate my body temperature."
Obviously, this was not the case. The Vulcan's lips and fingernails were turning brown - a product of his copper blood. His cheeks blushed bright green against the pale skin, and his exposed hands trembled every time they left tight fists. The Asseens sitting next to the Vulcan appeared to have pity on him, but there was little they could do short of offering him warm beverages. Unfortunately, their idea of "hot" drinks was more like lukewarm mop water than anything else.
Despite his obvious discomfort, Kirk did not bother relieving the Vulcan and letting him return to the ship. Bones did try arguing, but the captain knew it was futile. Spock had not let him go to planets alone in the four months since their five-year mission started. If it were anyone else, Kirk would be offended, but he knew the reason.
Spock refused to let his captain die again. Whether it was out of loyalty or their friendship (Kirk was pretty sure it was the latter), he knew there was no point in fighting it.
The clinking of chimes from the room's perimeter alerted the group to an upcoming toast from the "Grand Sorcerer," who, in essence, ran the planet. While Kirk was puzzled by a post-Warp civilization still believing in sorcerers and magic, he had to admit he liked this leader.
Bones let out a sigh of relief, because this toast meant this small banquet was coming to an end and they would soon be back on the warm ship. Even Spock appeared glad for the end to this trip.
"Friends, from both our planet and beyond, I wanted to thank you for coming to my home to share this meal with..."
Kirk winced as his universal translator sputtered and squealed - a consequence of being exposed to cold temperatures for so long. It was the new model that fit behind the ear, and he had already had to replace four. Apparently in the rush to make new technology after Nero, no one accounted for extreme temperatures in their instruments.
Bones was having the same problem if the look on his face was any indication. Even worse, the table they were sitting at was at least twenty feet long with the speaker on the opposite end, and the soft grunts that made up the Asseen's language were obscured by the room's echo. Even Uhura's brief lesson on the language basics was useless in this situation.
Kirk looked to Spock to see if he could get translation help, but Spock had already removed his UT from behind his ear.
"Captain," Spock's shaky voice whispered once he realized Kirk's distress. "Based on my rudimentary knowledge of this tongue, I believe he is seeking to give you a gift as an offer of friendship. I am unable to determine the nature of the gift, but based on this civilization's peaceful nature, I doubt it will be of harm to you or the ship."
Kirk smirked and nodded. He knew there was a silent And if the gift is somehow dangerous, you do not need to fear because I will protect you. The reminder of how safe he was with his Vulcan friend made Kirk feel warmer than he had this entire mission.
A soft nudge from Spock made Kirk sit up in attention. Da'Ath was gesturing toward Kirk with a hand comparable to the paw of a polar bear, only with larger claws and an opposable thumb. The captain smiled and stood, making his way to the head of the table.
The UT was now kicking in at random intervals, but the occasional Standard words were not making much difference in Kirk's understanding of the Grand Sorcerer's farewell address. The intimidating hand gripped his shoulder in a friendly gesture, and his face looked upon Kirk's with great admiration and warmth. Kirk thanked his lucky stars this race had similar facial cues to humans, because otherwise he would be lost.
The only moment of surprise was when Da'Ath threw his arm around Kirk and hugged him to his side. The stab of the thousand thick, wiry hairs through his clothes was a bit of a shock on cold skin, but Kirk nonetheless held it together.
Finally, the grunts slowed down, and "in closing" made its way to Kirk's ear. Da'Ath let the captain go, and held him at arm's length in front of him. As if there were not twenty other dignitaries in the room, the Great Sorcerer looked Kirk in the eye and smiled.
"Captain," Da'Ath managed in Standard. He pointed to Kirk's ear and said, "Smoke."
Kirk's face fell and felt behind the ear where his malfunctioning translator lay. It was hot to the touch, and once he plucked it off to take a look, it definitely had smoke coming out of it. Kirk choked back his embarrassment and let out a laugh. He then held it up and attempted the Asseen word for "translator." The leader laughed, which caused several of the other dinner guests to do the same. He then looked apologetic. Kirk knew this would not be a huge issue with this easy-going culture, but habit dictated he look in control at all times and he now felt naked and exposed.
"Captain Kirk," Da'Ath said slowly and with some difficulty. There was no "K" sound in this culture after all. "Will...you accept...my greatest...gift. A gift...I only give...to closest...most trusted...good hearts?"
Kirk's face broke into a grin. Despite the weather, he was sad he would have to leave these people so soon. Most cultures only looked up to him because of his "hero cred" or because he had come back from the dead. The Asseens seemed unimpressed with everything except his care for others, particularly his crew mates. Kirk did not consider himself Mother Theresa by any means, and did not believe himself worthy of such attention, but the fact they respected him for reasons other than his prestige was a high point.
Between translator malfunctions, the conversations with this man and his court were downright pleasant. The trip had initially been about negotiations for mining the dilithium deposits situated at their equator. Although they set limits, the Asseens were willing to allow mining as soon as possible in exchange for access to our medical knowledge - an odd trade if there ever was one. Kirk did not know what to do with himself for the rest of the time he set aside for negotiating, so he explained about Earth's warmth, and how they were recovering from a "greenhouse effect" humans caused in the past few centuries. The natives were fascinated, even more so when Kirk showed them holos of tropical places like Hawaii. The Asseens, in turn, showed Kirk their vast glacial formations, making the Captain's jaw drop. They spoke of the differences between living on a hot and a cold planet, and Kirk was relieved these people did not look down on humans (or Vulcans) because they were different. This was the first new race he had encountered who boasted that.
Kirk cleared his throat in order to respond with his limited Asseen vocabulary. In a series of slow grunts, Kirk responded, "I would be honored, friend."
Without hesitation, one of DaArth's aides gave Kirk a small glass tube with a light blue liquid inside. The captain furrowed his brow and looked to the Grand Sorcerer for instruction. With a laugh, the Asseen shaped his hand into a "C" and put it to his lips, mimicking drinking.
A cleared throat behind him alerted Kirk to Bones' reservations about drinking a mysterious liquid on a new planet. However, Kirk was not inclined to believe these people would give him poison. Even if he had an allergic reaction, the Enterprise was right above him, and his friends would get him to safety in no time.
Kirk gulped the drink, which had a taste of carbonated mineral water. Immediately, Da'Ath let out a grunt of satisfaction and placed his substantial palm on Kirk's forehead. Once their skin made contact, a strange electricity surged through the captain's body. The shock of the sensation temporarily paralyzed him as his blood tingled with electricity. Momentary panic filled Kirk in that he feared he would explode. In the corner of his eye, he saw Bones and Spock stand from their seats ready to run to their friend's side.
Within a minute, it was clear their help was not necessary. The tingling stopped, and Kirk felt completely normal, if not a little warmer than before. He would have dismissed it as his adrenaline making his heart beat faster, but that should not have made him downright comfortable in this icy room. Maybe this gift was some form of insulation from the cold. Maybe that was how this race stood the climate. Then again, if it was that, why did Da'Ath act like it was such a precious offering? It was not like this race needed extra protection from the cold with their copious hair.
Kirk was startled when Da'Ath let out a loud growl that echoed in the hall, making all the other Asseens in the room join in the jubilant sounds. The captain used the opportunity to shuffle back to his comrades and sit in his seat. He could practically feel the glare from Bones about so flippantly taking an alien concoction, and Spock was likely not happy either. He was sure there would be hell to pay once he got back to the Enterprise.
Thankfully, he would have longer to wait until he got his ear chewed off because he no longer craved the human-perfect temperatures on his Silver Lady. The weather here felt positively divine.
oOOOo
"Sickbay. Now."
The three men had barely materialized in the transporter room before Bones uttered his muted, if not resigned, orders. While he knew it would be in his best interests to respond right away, Kirk's first instinct was to resist.
"Actually, I should debrief with Spock before..."
"Our debriefing can wait, Captain," Spock hastily interjected. "I believe it is standard procedure to be examined by the ship's doctor after returning from a previously unvisited planet, especially if you ingest items we have not been able to scan."
"If you'll recall, Spock, there is a time limit of 48 hours..."
"Oh, don't you dare play the innocent act," Bones sighed. "Not only did we all have to freeze our balls off in that icebox they call a planet, but I also have to worry about you drinking any liquid that goes under your nose." Bones hit his tricorder with the heel of his hand and cursed as particles of frost fell to the ground. "Can someone bring me a scanner that's not fucking useless?"
"Doctor, despite your obsessive proclivity for immediate scanning, it is illogical the readings would be any different if we wait the 2.52 minutes it takes to walk to Sickbay in order to use their far more accurate tricorder."
Bones sighed. "A lot can happen in 2 point...whatever minutes, you green-blooded..."
"Okay, okay," Kirk said, holding up his hands. "Let's all go to Sickbay and get the hilarity over with."
"I doubt Sickbay has ever been considered funny, Captain."
Kirk looked at Spock with a half smile. The Vulcan still looked a bit uncomfortable, but his tone had improved and there was no tremble in his voice. In fact, there was the endearing ghost of a smile Spock seemed to save just for him.
"Clearly you have never seen Bones when he grabs a nap on the bio beds. He clearly has PTSD from the terrifying clowns of North Georgia."
Spock raised an eyebrow. "Indeed, it appears I was mistaken when it comes to human definitions of humor Vulcans, of course, do not have clowns, nor your penchant for deprecating amusement."
Yeah right, Jim thought to himself as he remembered the dozen of light jibes Spock had lobbed at him in the past months.
A firm hand grabbed Kirk's shoulder and practically pushed him toward the door. "Enough of your stalling, Jim. Don't make me tell him about your own nocturnal shouts of 'Expecto Petronius!'"
At Kirk's blush, Spock said, "I believe you just did, Doctor, although I do not see why dreams of possessing magic powers resembling that of a 21st century book series would be unusual."
Bones chuckled. "Just wait until you hear who he says it to."
Again, Spock lifted an eyebrow. "That would be fascinating to discuss."
"But we can't," Kirk quickly said as he jogged into the turbo lift. "I have a physical to get done."
Bones raised an eye brow of his own. "Wow, I should have gone for that angle a long time ago."
Once they reached sickbay, Kirk hopped into the bio bed enthusiastically, no doubt giving his two friends amusement at his discomfort.
Bones unhooked the larger scanner from its resting place and ran it over Kirk's body. The captain leaned back with his arm bent to pillow his neck as he shot an amused look toward Spock. Strangely, the Vulcan averted his eyes millimeters to the right so he was looking just beyond Kirk and over Bones' shoulder. Too bad Kirk knew his friend too well. Based on the movements of his lips, Spock's tongue was going back and forth against the inside of his mouth in what amounted to his version of a nervous twitch.
"Worried, Spock?"
The man in question widened as if startled. "Certainly not, captain. I simply do not desire to take over your command while my body is recovering from the lower temperatures. I do not predict my efficiency will be at optimum levels."
"It turns out there is no use for worry," Bones said. "Your body temperature is down a pinch, so I will expect you to sleep with a warming blanket tonight. Otherwise you're fit as a fiddle."
"No noticeable changes to physiology?" Spock asked.
Kirk lifted his eyes brows as he sat up. "Jeeze, Spock. You sound disappointed. You didn't even notice Bones comparing my health to an inanimate Terran string instrument."
"No, Captain. Merely puzzled. The Grand Sorcerer said he was going to give you an exclusive gift, and there was no understandable indication of what this gift was. As we left the castle, the people looked to you with a strange form of reverence that did not exist before you accepted the offering."
"Spock, those people are pretty superstitious," Bones said. "Da'Ath probably gave him a blessing of some kind, like Isaac gave to his sons."
Spock furrowed his brow in confusion.
"I thought your Mom was Jewish, Spock," Kirk sighed. "Near the beginning of the book of Genesis, Isaac was the son of Abraham, and had two sons, but only the oldest would get the blessing of their dying father."
Spock jumped in, "My mother told me the story, Captain. Jacob, the youngest, fooled his blind father into thinking he was his older brother so he could get the blessing. I always found the story most illogical, because when he discovered his error, Isaac was distraught as if the blessing he gave his youngest was a material thing he could not replicate. He could have easily said words over the heads of both sons."
"You have to get into the heads of ancient humans," Bones supplied. "To them, the blessing was a mystical thing, and could not be given twice. I know that computer brain of yours is unable to comprehend the supernatural..."
"On the contrary, Doctor. I'm sure you're aware of the Vulcan reverence for the immortal soul - something most humans view as 'supernatural.' It is simply irrelevant to the living."
"It wasn't irrelevant to Isaac," Kirk said. "And it probably isn't irrelevant to Da'Ath. I'm with Bones on this one, although I'm pretty sure something weird was in that drink. I felt tingly when he touched me."
"It was probably some kind of nerve stimulator mixed with the cold. Too bad we'll never know. Whatever it was, it's out of your system now."
"Too bad. I was hoping for a tangible gift, like a fruit basket or something."
Bones rolled his eyes. "Just what we would have needed. More alien substances to make you break out in hives."
Kirk laughed and jumped off the bed. "Am I free to go, oh Master of Pain?"
Bones shook his head and shooed Kirk out with one hand. He barely heard the doctor haranguing Spock to get his own physical before he turned the corner and made a beeline for the turbo lift. Once inside, Kirk aired out his trench coat since he was starting to sweat underneath. He did not think to tell Bones about the increased tolerance for cold, but at the time it was not important so he quickly filed this fact away to think on later.
Kirk would not think on it for two months - when the nature of his gift from the Asseens made itself abundantly clear.