Work Text:
1. Meeting
“How long have you been waiting for your guardian?”
Natsu blinked for a second before she was momentarily reminded of where she was. A second pair of brown eyes observed her closely as she opened her mouth to response but when she tried to explain herself no words came out of her mouth right away. There was a sigh from the other end, and another kid’s voice coming from behind them. Natsu’s chest clenched simultaneously with the sudden realization that she was utterly alone and away from home.
“Hey, don’t worry I’m a regular volunteer.” The taller and older boy spoke in hopes of soothing her.
It exactly didn't help. It actually just made her painfully aware that her big brother had most likely forgot to pick her up today since their mom’s schedule had called for an unexpected change that involved for her to be working late that afternoon. From the corner of her eyes she spotted the teen’s genuine smile and soothing voice as he tried his best to keep her calm. It was sort of obvious to see that even though they were still technically strangers, Natsu was still consciously able to see how comfortable he was as a role of a big brother. There were tall tale signs as he managed to make her smile and make her heart relax with his presence.
“Uncle Tooru! Uncle Tooru what’s taking you too long? I thought you already escaped your crazy fangirls at your school before you got here.”
A young boy with shaved head and similar brown eyes and nose went straight towards their direction. There was a curiosity in the boy’s eyes when he stared at her for a quick moment before going back to looking at the teen for a silent conversation that only lasted for a couple of seconds.
“Who are you? Aren't you a little young to be one of his fangirls?”
Natsu frowned at him before replying. “I'm Natsu. And I'm waiting for my big brother to pick me up.” Her downcast face came back with vengeance. “But I think he forgot that our mom told him where I am.”
The younger boy patted her shoulder. “Really? That sucks. I’m Takeru and this is my uncle Tooru.” He gestured to himself and then his apparent uncle quickly as he kept talking. “Well if you want we can wait with you until he comes. And Uncle Tooru can lend you his phone to call your big brother too just in case he needs reminding. Right?”
He beamed at his uncle who in turn smiled at her in agreement. As he pulled out his cellphone he kneeled over for to pass it over.
“Do you know your brother's number?”
“Yes.”
When the phone only rang without anyone picking up she sheepishly looked at them. “I guess he's still not on break or finished with practice.”
As Nastu gave back Tooru’s phone he raised a brow. “On break for what?”
Natsu beamed for a second. “Oh, he's in a team sport for his high school.”
“Must be a long practice if he's still not here to pick you up.” Tooru said disapprovingly and sympathetically as Nastu grimaced at the time.
It was evident that she couldn't really fault her brother for running late or forgetting to pick her up; it wasn't the first time. After all, she knew from experience that Shouyou could get preoccupied when it concerned to his love for volleyball.
“It's fine.” She stressed how okay she was with herself sitting at the side of the front stairs of the community center. “Besides, I know he'll eventually come here frantically looking for me and apologize. He's a little scattered brained but he's a good brother.”
Both uncle and nephew shared a look before sitting themselves next to her. Tooru was the first to strike a series of word games to pass the time. By the time her brother’s voice rang Natsu quickly grabbed her belongings and flashed them a grateful smile as she bid them a temporary farewell.
2. Re-introductions (school mates)
Going to school was never really all that fun.
It was true that she didn't share the same sentiments as her brother the way he loved going on his bike and getting his daily runs but, Natsu did appreciate the views the suburbs had. Waking up was a disaster in the making with all the blanket turning and having to pry her eyes open just so she wouldn't trip over her own two feet. It was like a hurl of murky eyesight and sluggish movements of her own body trying to remember how to operate for the simplest requests of brushing her hair or washing her face. The start was always slow, of Natsu beginning to pick up how the sun’s warmth hit her skin or how cold the crisp wind could be in the morning.
Yet, when she became aware of her surroundings she glowed. Like a bonafide Hinata, Natsu’s bubbly smiles sparkled when she saw how cheerful her brother’s spirit manifested into her own personal space. It was a chain reaction; that was one of the few mercies that came when Shouyou was a sibling.
He always hovered in their rushed breakfasts with his jokes and happy chatter. It was his gleam from his eyes that gave her courage when they went their separate ways. In her own world that carried the hours without her mother and brother Natsu made sure to smile. Because if there was anything that her brother and mother taught her it was a Hinata is a sun. She would embody that warmth and spread her positivity like the way her family did with the world.
That was what made her cringe when she got stuck at times when her nerves halted her advancements. Normally she was not a shy child. Natsu was known for making friends fast and at least being around a crowd of people during their breaks. But for some reason she felt like there was a weight in her arms, her legs and her head. Like an invisible cloth that was strangling circulation in her limbs. It left her with an uncomfortable sensitivity for the rest of the morning she walked to school.
The resolution didn’t appear until she was well into the school gates, she bypassed most her classmates in a daze. In a drifting pace she felt a cold wind hit her fingers and exposed neck. But it was the voice that caught most of her attention.
“Hey Natsu! I didn't know we went to the same school.”
His excitement was thoroughly apparent as he waved at her to wait for him to catch up with her.
His smile didn't waver when he was next to her. “Small world huh?”
Unknowingly and effortlessly his presence lifted her clouded thoughts. Natsu hummed in agreement as she continued their reintroductions with adding small facts about herself and vice versa. She didn’t tell him until years later but Hinata Natsu was grateful to the universe that day for giving her one of her closest friends.
3. Hobbies
Very quickly Natsu was given a crash course of how devoted Oikawa Tooru and Takeru were to volleyball. It was a passion that she couldn’t ignore anymore. Not in her house, not in school and most importantly not away from her closest people that she loved. It was not even surprising of how quickly she loved the Oikawa pair. There was just so many similarities that they shared with her older brother that it was second nature to adore them.
She learned the rules properly, the positions and the technical aspects that Shouyou was being drilled over.
In many ways she was impressed at the athleticism that all three boys held and nurtured. She may not have been a volleyball junkie like them but Natsu was still supportive to all their practices and games. While she couldn’t go join and participate with Tooru or Shouyou she loved it when her class got to play with Takeru during p.e. That was when she felt like she could understand in some level of the rush that they were all addicted to. It was almost empowering.
The gym was a stage. With its witness in the sidelines, of shouts of people trying to make calls and one’s own body moving with that tempo. The ball would be flying, and all the players on the court would dance.
Natsu could appreciate it.
“Are you sure you won’t tryout?” Takeru wiped off a stray line of sweat that coated his forehead. “When Uncle Tooru showed you some basic tricks you picked them up faster than the other kids at the community center.”
Her breathing was returning normal after their game was over. She looked at the court and then flexed her muscles from her legs. She felt amazing and well exercised. “I don’t know.”
And that was the truth, there was bundling feeling that she wanted to recreate when she was playing. But at the same, Natsu wanted to continue exploring her options. She could be an athlete if she really wanted, but there were other smaller clubs that she could get into too.
As if sensing her thoughts Takeru smiled at her. “No pressure Natsu. You don’t have to feel like you have to join just because of my uncle and your brother are volleyball fanatics. We’d still be friends if you joined the library club or something else nerdy.”
She garbed a stray volleyball as they continued cleaning the gym. There was a small lapse of silence that coated them as they put away all the remaining volleyballs. When they were done Natsu spoke up.
“’Isn’t there an amateur art club here?”
Takeru cocked an eyebrow up before shrugged his shoulders. “Maybe. I think one of my classmates was trying to establish earlier in the year. But I think they didn’t have enough club members.”
Natsu pursed her lips before walking with a wide grin.
“Well then, if they didn’t have an official club yet then they will soon.”
Volleyball may have always been centered stage for Natsu for a couple of years as a supporter for her brother and now Tooru and Takeru but, it was time to look at new possible hobbies for herself.
4. Favorite color(s)
For the longest time Hinata Natsu had thought that orange was her favorite color. It was bright, colorful, in your face and warm. It reminded her of summer days in the beach or citrus drinks with ice while sipping at a river. The color had always given her the sense of freedom and happiness. That, and because it was the color of her hair.
She had always prided in herself and Shouyou for their unique coloring.
In a very young age she learned that being different could mean that people judged hard. And while it was hard to like everyone, her mom and brother were her pillars to show her how to navigate from and away those people. That was why when had Takeru and Tooru were in her life now she wondered how it was possible to underestimate how her favorite color could change without her noticing. Orange was still her first response and immediate comfort but, weirdly enough, brown was starting to creep into her focus. It was an underrated kind of warm color.
The shades ranged all over, but for the most part she loved how brown was a sturdy kind of color. The one that combined nature’s strongest elements and the sweetness of chocolate. It held that type of versatile flexibility that she admired. That, and because it reminded her of the way her brother and the Oikawa’s eyes all each were imbedded into her head. Each of their shades sparked, melted and bore into her soul. They made brown a color that gave her a greater sense of appreciation towards her own insecurities.
It may have been a little silly, but she loved creating small paintings that centered with those two colors. Natsu wanted to show the world what she saw when she thought about them. To want them to crave same the warmness Natsu grew up to. She was sure they would all crack up with her creations in the beginning but, that wouldn’t stop her from pouring her emotions and memories in her pieces. Colors in paintings were just the start, soon her words would peel over and then they would encourage others to see the world she loved.
But for now, with one brush and a row of paint she would weave her imagery.
She would emphasize the intensity of their eyes when they were on their own courts. Then show how they melted the crowds when they smiled and shared their secrets of happiness. But most of all, Natsu would showcase the warmth that they provided her when she needed them.
“Natsu? Is that a picture of me?”
Shouyou’s easy smile transformed to a bashful one. He took another glance at another portrait of him and their mom laughing at the porch of the house. The orange of his hair and the green of plants were vibrantly cool when compared to the warmer tones of the wooden section of the door.
“Do you like it?”
Shouyou chuckled as he picked up and spin her around, “I don’t know why you would pick me as a subject but I LOVE IT!”
The next day she showed Takeru one of her paintings. It was of him and Tooru with a volleyball being passed around. It was still a little clumsy with her coloring but he looked bashful too as he took a picture of it from one of Tooru’s old phones that he gave to him.
“I bet you uncle Tooru is going to rub it in Haijime’s face when he gets this text and cry a little when he sees you.”
Natsu could only laugh out loud when Tooru did indeed cry a little when he looked at her. (There was even a little bruise under his chin. She could only guesstimate that it came from his best friend after he raved about the painting one too many times.)
5. Rediscoveries
Natsu sometimes hated that her squad of volleyball junkies always won majority of the debates and voting sessions. But that was the price to pay when she was only one that didn’t play the sport or joined a team. There were instances where she couldn’t fully comprehend some of their metaphorical phrases or experiences. But that didn’t always last long, they would all eventually come back to a corner where she could vaguely understand. She was after all, a part-time artist and athlete.
One-day Natsu had found herself needing an extra session of exercise to get rid of the excessive energy the Hinatas were well-known for.
Natsu had found it by accident. It was during a time when the cultural sports festivals were on and she watched some of the students racing in some obstacles as they represented their clubs. The art club was doing something else with the theater play that was going to be a little later. The racing portion somehow called out to her. There was a flicker of elegance in their running, a precision that she hadn’t acquired yet herself. They were all young beginners, with youth still clinging into their coordination.
Her brother and Tooru both were prime examples of that refinement that Natsu and Takeru would one-day hone if they trained for it. But it was in that present of witnessing track and field that Natsu realized where a side passion was calling for her. Running had always been a bane of her existence, but with all the sports and athletic routes she could have taken, she was pulled back to track. It was a sort of funny joke to her, Natsu had early experiences of running with her brother and always losing. But now, it was like her body was speaking in a different language, and her mind was starting to translate these new feelings in order.
She was sure that the way her body was shivering in excitement and in second-hand anticipation cocooning her limbs was a sure sign of where she was headed for.
All the stories, and memories that were cherished in their conversations made it clear for Natsu. She would watch all the races for now. But when the next opportunity came she would itch and push into the frontlines. It would give her more time to bond over with her brother, Tooru and Takeru. (Which was something she wouldn’t complain about any time soon.)
It had sprouted from a small moment of clumsiness and coincidence, but now Natsu’s view was developing a new course.
The Hinata luck stroked her schedule as she doubled down her new sleeping, social and studying duties. It may have frightened others but Natsu quickly learned she thrived in chaos of being in numerous clubs. There was always something to do, or someplace to be. Either way joining their school’s track and field gave her body’s need to exert her extensive amounts of energy that kept her awake at night or in the middle of her lectures. It was from all this new hidden guidance that life had provided her made her see who wide and untold it really was. Beneath all its twists, it was a humble kind of trip that she wanted to never end.
Every practice, club meetings and social interaction Natsu poured her soul deeply until it left marks after she left. And that was how she preferred.
6. Fangirls
In an instant Natsu was sure of that the air became a static war field.
She peered through setting and almost groaned at the popularity that Tooru was forced to live with. Their faces were all eerily and sickly sweet that it was dripping in fake kindness. Their voices were just as plastic when they got closer to her personal bubble. Thankfully, Tooru’s charming smiles and silver tongue was able bypass their hoarding when he firmly presented Natsu and Takeru to them. There had been a fraction of dissatisfaction that swelled into their bodies but when they all peered into Tooru’s eyes they all melted a pathway for him to leave.
It had been a surreal experience, with each person watching his figure and inertly hers and Takeru when they held his hands. But one that Natsu learned to contemplate later when she was alone to freely escape their judgments. Nonetheless, the experience of fangirls made her weary to adolescence and its subliminal texts.
It was in their eyes, hauntedly possessed creatures, that made Natsu feel self-conscience and apprehensive about being sentenced and ultimately be reduced to a tragic future where she would be enchanted by a boy to that extend. There were no real indicators of what the future foretold or carried. Yet, in those times when she was filled by their perfumes and goods of food, Natsu’s lungs burned. Her limbs became stone. And it was only because of Tooru’s reassured smiles that led her to peace.
He had lived with their stares since his boyish looks became ingrained to those vain fantasies of theirs; and they would be sustained until they perished with the same high stakes values corrupted his fame and supposed “beauty faded”. That insight of how careless and otiose people were, made her quietly clench her fists. Because, no matter what she said, or did people would only listen to their own justified purposes.
Like clockwork, Tooru’s fans only saw what they wanted.
It was only from his outer displays from his mask that he perfected over his school careers that survived as an individual description of himself. Not his selflessness for his team, or compassion with younger children. Just his pretty face and petty humor. That never resided into her stomach peacefully. Second hand information like that was the reason why she established herself as a pillar for Tooru; because she wanted him to see that she liked who he was behind that mask he wore. In was spite that circled into her motivations and genuine likeness that she had for him that she wanted Shouyou to see Tooru in that light too. Tooru had become her unofficial big brother too.
From the sea of worshippers, Natsu had pitied some. They were always in the back of the crowds, with fragile hearts sewn to their sleeves and shier demeanors being temporarily forgotten. The truly lost ones as they were high from their first loves of a person they knew would never look at them with similar intensity. While the others that were crazy and overzealous, she was terrified by the glowers that they gave her when she clung to one sleeve of his jackets or shirts.
It was from their force of dominating personalities that baffled her in the beginning.
Now it was casted into a series horrid dreams of their possessives tenancies that they all thought deserved him that made her weary when she got too close to his high school. There had been other instances when she was away from his campus but his fangirls still intruded her bonding time with him. Tooru had always been apologetic when they interrupted, but Natsu could never fault him for that conduct.
It was sadly, a part of his life that he was thrusted upon to carry.
“I double checked with Mattsun and Makki this time.”
His downcast eyes lingered to his feet as they sat down on a discreet edge of an ice cream parlor. Takeru had went inside first to order.
“Tooru. Its seriously okay.”
He never fully looked happy when she said those words.
“I know but—”
Natsu gently smiled at him. “It’s not your fault that your fangirls can be quite good at tracking you.”
His slumped shoulders squared, “But I’m supposed to better at not letting them swarm us.”
Natsu nudged a shoe to the bottom of her metal chair. “And you are. Takeru and I have always appreciated at how much you take care of us from them.” She patted his arm that was closest to her. “Now stop frowning or you’ll get wrinkles.”
“Natsu! How mean!”
Takeru came back into the scene with Natsu and his uncle laughing freely and loudly.
7. Music/ Playlists
Drawing out a sigh Natsu stretched her limbs until she felt that burn crease her blood in her cells. The routine jog was doing wonders to her abundant energy that was only increasing each day. As a true Hinata, Natsu basked in the touch of achievement when she finished her laps before getting ready for school. It had been difficult to break past her morning sluggish demeanor, but she had managed to create an opening to jog and get ready for school. That didn’t mean that there were some mishaps of waking up late or not having enough time to eat without choking at little but Natsu was proud to have restarted a new routine.
One of the benefits of securing her mornings came from Tooru and indirectly from his posse.
Now, one of the first things that people soon noticed about her was her inability of going to sleep right away. It was as if her ears were wired to pick up any little noise that passed by her surroundings. The difficulty of steering her mind to blank had the same qualities. It was a tug-a-war to sleep and then a worse time to wake up from her deep slumber she valiantly fought for earlier to achieve. There was no middle ground between them.
Until Tooru overheard about her problems. It promptly staged Natsu into getting articles, and online suggestions from him. His quick attachment made it easier for her to come playlists being made for her to sleep, or wake her up. Tooru’s popularity was strangely a small mercy when he had a list of songs recommend prepared for her to try out. Using an old mp3 player that she was given from her brother she jotted down the songs that relaxed her, and gave her the right tones to peacefully lull her in the comfort of her room.
The playlists’ strange power was the tipping point.
It tangled itself to draw attention from Shouyou’s own friends as they added their own recommendations. (But, that was another story of how she befriended Tsukishima and Ennoshita with their passions for the arts.)
What evolved was the level of inspiration she was drawn from music. It helped her when she wanted to clear her thoughts or when she needed a second layer of hidden thoughts pouring into her pieces. It became a soundtrack in her world.
Whether it was instrumental or had lyrics, each song and individual tone that made Natsu see in clarity.
“Natsu, I got another list for you!”
Tooru’s grins lit up the living room where Takeru and herself were laying around. They had been doing homework while Tooru was texting his own friends as he supervised them. (They had informed him that they weren’t little kids but rather big enough to not warrant a babysitter. Hence him supervising, not babysitting them. There was a difference.)
Takeru glanced at the text as Tooru showed them his phone. Where there was indeed an updated list of new potential songs for Natsu to try out after they finished their homework. In this round, it consisted with more modern showtune songs.
“Have you been bombarded with the theater fangirls this time?” Takeru’s grin widen when Tooru sputtered in a pout.
Natsu only giggled as she packed her homework and watched a grumbling Tooru go over to his computer and open YouTube.
They ended up adding five showtunes for one her of jogging playlists.
8. Sibling lifestyles
While Tooru may have been older than her, there were still days when she felt like he could understand her predicaments of being a younger sibling.
It wasn’t like Natsu was partially mad at her brother, or that they had a spat recently. There were just instances when she wanted to vent, with no chronological order or by grave ordinances. Takeru was an only child. So, there were just some things that he could never really understand. He had Tooru, but they were first most, uncle and nephew.
On the days she hanged out with Takeru, Tooru was there eighty percent of the chance. He had grown up with an older sibling and thus had similar grievances of having to deal with overprotective siblings. Unlike other classmates that did have older siblings, most of them weren’t as attached as Natsu was to Shouyou. That was what was hard to talk to others. Her relationship was by far more tame and friendly.
And a part of her understood why others had more difficulty. Most siblings couldn’t handle the dynamic shift of the older siblings going to middle school or high school. There had been a cycle of when Natsu did miss Shouyou when he started middle school and ultimately getting hooked with volleyball. She could never deny that small rift that appeared in her heart; but she got it. And instead she became sportive with Shouyou’s happy smiles and loved listening to his excited re-tales of his progress from the sport.
Tooru, in many ways, was the same.
There had been a time when he was inseparable with his older brother. He had a lot of stories and there were photo albums of them playing around and being each other’s best friends. There had always been a gleam in his eyes when reminisced about their bond that they had when Takeru asked about his childhood. That was where Natsu had realized how closely related she felt with him. There were these common factors that they shared that made her feel at ease when she vented to him.
She liked how she found out that his sibling was the one that showed him clips and games of volleyball and created the tight bond he had with Iwaizumi today. Their bonding time may have suffered a little over the years, but it was still present that Tooru loved his brother. He loved taking care Takeru, who was a piece of the Oikawa legacy and their infatuation with volleyball.
Her friendship may have of started off from a random meeting, but it was times that presented themselves for her to need someone like Tooru that made her grateful. Shouyou was a great big brother. Never get that wrong. She would always love and appreciate his role in her life. But so was Tooru.
His humor and sharp instincts had always amazed her when he was able to pinpoint her emotions. The lifestyle of a younger sibling had its pros and cons, but with her inner circle always being there to support her, it made Natsu thankful for them.
9. Shouyou and Oikawa off the court
Once upon a time, Natsu had imagined (or wished too many times that she lost count) that Shouyou and Tooru would have had some kind of understanding of each other as they were familiar of being sibling themselves with their own appropriate families.
And while she knew that Tooru was a younger brother fundamentally, and Shouyou, albeit younger than Tooru was an older brother. She had thought they could have started in a more friendlier light when they came face to face when she and Takeru were in the same vicinity. But then again, she should have realized the extend of what it meant to be teenagers and all its ridiculous endeavors it involved with. They had been immersed in their high school cliques and, more importantly, had been harped about school pride. Athletes had always been more likely to be cocky or created to be boastful about their achievements.
But now, Natsu was partially amazed at how prideful teenagers could get as the group was half composed of two opposing volleyball teams.
That still didn’t mean that Natsu had been happy with the day was going. She had been disheartened that Tooru became a little petty with Shouyou’s friends, and in particular, to Tobio. At the time however, Tooru never had explicitly informed her of his demons that Tobio and Ushijima had inclined to him with his love of volleyball.
(And maybe that had been the first echo that Natsu had been a child back then to fully understand what had separated her from his own world and complexities.)
She had at the time, no actual reason or place to have witnessed Tooru be that vulnerable when he was the closest to being an adult and her still being considered as a child. Their ages had never been an issue or a boarder before, but now, Natsu was aware of the limitations he had previously created between them. She had been hurt at the thought that Tooru didn’t feel as comfortable to veer some of his pain and fears, but she had understood. That had been the dynamic that was supposed to have been placed. He couldn’t have burdened her or Takeru that way.
Not really.
Especially when he was their designated chaperone firstly, then their friends. He had already so many obligations in his life, and being consulted by children wasn’t one of them. The sting of watching him coating his pain in mock pettiness was just odd. The experience was as if he was peering at his open scars in the open and inherently lying to the public and himself that he had been fine with the pain. It had been too painful to have been a bystander for it.
Their angry and surprise words were just as toxic and a whiplash to her tight hold of Shouyou’s arm.
Takeru who had been a few meters away from her had the same sentiments when he pulled himself in front of his uncle and gestured for Natsu to do the same with her brother.
“Shouyou! You promised that you wouldn’t act silly.”
“Yeah Uncle Tooru! We’re aren’t even in the middle of a volleyball game right now.”
The tension had still been penetrating her body but overall, Natsu had been relieved that the more sensible friends Shouyou and Tooru had were able to calm the rowdier bunch. Takeru and Natsu may have had their fun curved in the beginning, but apparently what had made of their group act friendly had been because of the result of them watching uncle Tooru in action. Since it had seemed that a domestic and very fraternal Tooru had been the last thing many of his peers and close friends alike had doubted he had the capacity for it.
Takeru and Natsu had eye rolled at that when they had said that out loud multiple of time throughout that day.
Because, after the multiple of times she had come to know Tooru, that soft side had always been there. It had never been a doormat, maybe a little misshaped and withered by his humor but he had always been a strong pillar. Shouyou was the same. He always looked silly and not too tough when compared to other taller boys but he had a heart of gold. He was a good big brother that always tried his best to there for her.
And that was what mattered.
Off court both Shouyou and Tooru were silly, emotional, happy goofballs. But they were both serious when it came to family. That was why Natsu had always wanted to see how they would act together alone or when she was with Takeru. To see how two people that loved volleyball and their families would become friends themselves. It had started harsh, oppressing and worrying but Natsu had been happy in the end. Tooru was still a little petty with Tobio and Shouyou was a little adorable with his fangirling when he gave some pointers (after Natsu gave him a look).
But it had been fun.
Something that Takeru and herself wanted to encourage again. Since it was a way for Karasuno and Aoba Johsai to get in friendlier terms. That and because it would give her a little bit more leeway to stop over and talk to Tooru. She had always liked spending time with the older boy. (And his movie collection was amazing as Takeru proclaimed off handedly.)
When she was walking home with Shouyou talking excitingly with Yamaguchi she smiled at how more relaxed he was after talking to Tooru and Takeru.
10. Instinct(s)
The edge of her pencil was annoying, the way that Natsu had constantly held it in a firm grip. The lead was brittle, its eraser was subpar and Natsu was getting too fed up at the debris she had accumulated since brunch. It had been an unlucky draw that she didn’t throw away her pencil last night and rechecked her pencil pouch to restock her supplies. It had been a last-minute change of plans. Shouyou had enough time and energy to play with her. Even at the expense of her current misfortune, Natsu didn’t regret her fun.
Because, it had been a while since she got the feeling of being younger and full of miscomputations and delirious fantasies.
She was still a kid; Natsu had accepted that fact. However, there was an underlayer that grappled her body. Time, had whipped her instincts in a carefully matter. It had made her forget about the how the present worked. Not only that, but how the future and past had curled into a slimy hill.
She had lost and lived a shorter life than Shouyou and Tooru, but Natsu Hinata had engulfed a truth of how the world worked.
People had always underestimated the youth, the younger the less Natsu was seen as wise.
It had made sense to others but Takeru saw it too. the pass of each breath they took, of every flicker of crossing an X on a calendar and season that passed them. time had been knocking, creating a shift that Natsu was not ready for. So, beyond her years Natsu had barely any cover to stop herself from crying. Her own body was frozen. As if an ice storm had lifted itself and shrugged it's cool breath in her own throat. Her eyes glazed as everything around her aligned itself almost to perfectly.
In a way, it felt like the universe was speaking to her, in a language that she had trouble decipher. It had been as beautiful as it had been terrifying. To be alienated in her own self-discoveries.
She brushed her own fingers from her cheeks, her lips were bitten when she looked over her reflection. Escaping one whimper in a silent room made it all the more real. Natsu had fought her own instincts to call for help. Because who would even understand her gibberish? Especially when the universe was talkative with its sharp colors phasing into her vision. The noises were just as distracting when she backed away from her reflection.
In a flash, Natsu reverted to her panic when she heard the (loud) door open. When Takeru saw her pale skin and silent tears Natsu brushed in quick looped sections of memories overplaying, she missed the way his own clammy hands had guarded her from the world, but the universe itself had dimmed out. In lower volumes it had talked to her. Slower, in gasps for her to see that she was not infinite.
Life had always been capricious. But in that moment with her best friend anchoring her, she wanted to flip off the universe. (Shouyou would have fainted if he knew where she learned a new onslaught of unsavory vocabulary from her few passing interactions from his older teammates.)
But that was the truth.
Natsu had the displeasure of meeting the concepts that humanity had laid. As well, the laws that the universe subjected them too.
One day it would all be gone. Sooner than Natsu would be comfortable about, as the clocks continued on tormenting her re-establishments of how life worked. She had been always a smart girl, but somehow that day reinstated her. It made her believe that she knew too much. A limbo of sorts that gave her room to wiggle her insecurity.
The instincts that had been buried, had now snapped into place.
“Natsu are you okay?” Takeru had stubbornly kept himself next to her.
Even after a faculty member had been informed about her distress.
Her throat cracked, “I think so.”
The silence that lapsed over them made her shoulders shake, her light sweater didn’t feel like it was doing its job properly. A chocolate bar that Takeru had bought for her was on her lap. In some faraway echo cars drove passed their school.
“Natsu.” Takeru’s expression was both comforting as it was disheartening to witness. “Just remember you can talk to me about anything and everything.”
Natsu choked back a laugh.
(Not everything Takeru, she could only inwardly think. Not everything.)
“I know.”
In that same blur of time it ticked. Another day came and went. But Natsu remembered it all with clarity.
It had started in an awful tempo, but Natsu went on with the crowd. Because if her time with talking to the universe proved anything, it was to treasure the present.
(Before it would go away for good.)
11. Interlude: Oikawa and Shouyou
In a strange turn of events, Oikawa was the first to openly and genteelly ask about Natsu.
The afternoon had been forgiving after springing its surprise humid rain showers. The shopping center was still bustling with life as Oikawa was walking calmly with Takeru. They had been shopping for a small gift for Natsu when they heard about her getting sick earlier in the school day. Her mother had quickly brought her home after finding another peer to fill in her hours for the day. Takeru had been reluctant the rest of the school day with Natsu’s presence being clearly gone.
When he told his uncle they both went on a quick quest to bring some joy on Natsu’s home. As they were browsing a small shop Natsu liked, they saw an orange spike of hair walking to an aisle in front of them. His hair and neck were still drying from earlier of the day, his sports jacket had clearly kept his shirt underneath but it was his shorts and shoes that told the story Natsu’s older brother adventure of getting to the same destination as them. His bright obnoxious orange hair (that they both adored from Natsu’s head) was damp enough for Oikawa to take pity. They didn’t much feel like spending any more time or effort on buying two presents for the Hinata family members that couldn’t dry themselves properly during rainy weather.
“Hey Shorty, take this is.”
Oikawa’s voice brought the older Hinata back out of his inner thoughts. His brown eyes widen as Oikawa expected and his voice picked up an octave as he tried to decline his generosity of using a spare towel to dry some of his hair.
“Come on your mom can’t have you getting sick too.”
A vocal pout made Oikawa and his nephew snort when they watched him grumped under his breath before finally accepting the towel. The trio then slowly walked back and forth the store as they all each shared the usual pleasantries of formality. It had been a while since Oikawa and Hinata were both in a room without a volleyball being a reason or without Takeru and Natsu in the middle.
There had been fewer occasions that allowed Hinata and Oikawa to be this open. Without having a lot of pressure in between their conversations. It was weird as it was awkward. It only was made more obstinate to breath when Takeru left them alone when he asked to go check another aisle for a minute. Oikawa had not liked it, but he knew how responsible and determined his nephew was to get the right gift for his best friend. That and because Takeru had given him an off comment the other day ago that Natsu really wanted her older brother and himself to get along better.
Watching his figure leave his side made him glance at Hinata as he bit his lip the way Natsu did when she was at a loss of words.
“Natsu and Takeru are really close.”
Oikawa looked at him closer when he spoke. The older Hinata had a smile with a bemused look in his eyes when he returned the stare. He clasped his hands together as he looked over a price of some art supplies.
“Yeah, they are.”
There was a sale going on the art section and the knickknacks that Natsu loved to collect. It seemed that Takeru was going to buy a couple of volumes of manga that Natsu had been dying to collect while her older brother was restocking on her supplies. His own basket was filled with some objects that his parents wanted him to pick up while he was out with Takeru.
“Natsu sees you as another brother she can rely on too.”
His voice was softer this time.
His brown eyes were shimmering with the intensity of a chocolate bar under the summer sun, they were growing limper as his tone became more frosty and careful. As if he was trading secrets he didn’t want to repeat but had to. It was different to watch a Hinata be shining less than the sun. His stomach grew heavy with the impaction that Hinata thought Oikawa was trying to replace his role. But in fact, Oikawa was simply just himself around her as he was with Takeru.
“Maybe.”
Hinata was both right and wrong for his conclusions. But Oikawa hated how cold his throat became when Hinata became stiff with his clip reply. He hated how fragile his friendship with people close to age was difficult to maintain or appease. That was why Iwaizumi was his own best friend; because he had the most experience of treading into Oikawa’s vast inner turmoil. He may have not known all of what made him but he was the closest.
But Hinata, the boy that was proving to be more emotional than realistic. It was making it harder for him to speak out load and for him to think of a way to say everything he needed to say before something would snap. Because he could see how hurt he made him feel with just one word.
“But when I’m with her and Takeru she always talks about how awesome her big brother is. She understands that high school and your ultimate goal is very important for you to accomplish.”
Hinata shook his head, he was still unsure of his place in Natsu’s heart. “I’m not always there though. When I’m not training or doing homework she was always is talking about you and Takeru. I’m not the big brother that I’m supposed to be.”
Oikawa shrugged his shoulders when he saw Takeru’s back was still close by. “Still doesn’t change the fact that she’s a smart girl to see that you love her in your own way. I may be an uncle now, but I remember the times my older siblings had less time with me. So, trust me when I tell you that I know how Natsu is going through. And I can tell that she is very proud to be your little sister.”
“Really?”
“I’m a hundred percent sure. I’m a volleyball captain, an uncle and younger brother. I know these things.” He flips a bang that fell down his eyes, “And it doesn’t hurt that I’m popular good-looking guy to see and know these kinds of things.”
They eventually drifted back to where Takeru was and his chosen volumes. After they purchased their belongings and as the clouds kept the rain away Hinata smiled softly at him. The rest of the journey to Hinata’s home was far more pleasant. As they chuckled at Takeru’s figure greeting Hinata’s mom and going to Natus’s room straight away they gave the small duo a private few minutes to themselves. The home’s warmth and well-worn walls made Oikawa breathe in quiet sips.
“You know, I’m kind of glad that she has you and Takeru.” Oikawa’s surprised expression made Hinata’s cheeks turn into a dusty pink. “I mean after everything…she looks some more happy.” He avoided looking directly at Oikawa. “So, thanks for being there for here. You aren’t as scary as I thought before. Well maybe on the court but then not really since I have Kageyama and the rest of Karasuno…” and his rambling continued on as Oikawa started to chuckle as Hinata’s mouth kept on working making Oikawa feel his heart twitch.
It may have taken a little longer than Natsu may have wanted but Oikawa and Hinata were starting to see each other in a different light.
And it was all thanks to Natsu’s fateful run in with the Oikawas.
12. Summer break
Once the summer season was bristling Natsu joined the enormous group of boos when her class had to go outside. Under the sun and its piercing heat her skin started to whine. Her sweat was dripping an unflattering secession. Her muscles were hyper aware of the laziness that summer drugged her into when it was at the hottest time. The only small mercy was the water bottle that was nestled against her neck.
Her skin was clammy, her exposed sections were even more uncomfortable when she reapplied her sunscreen again before they had to go outside their air-conditioned classroom. In the back of her mind, she could picture Takeru’s own complains once her class would meet with his for their joint hour. With her outdoor shoes stepping out to the dirt the few shading trees looked so inviting. Her thoughts were all replaced with the gleam of promise that all she had to do was compile for only a few more hours before summer break would officially start.
Her clubs that she was on weren’t all that attached compared to Shouyou’s were. But nonetheless she was a little sad that she would not heavily talk to most of her peers she had. However, what kept her up was that Takeru and herself had planned their summer together.
They would be going to the river near their district, going to see a couple of movies and find more hours to watch the cartoons that would be premiering this season.
It was almost all too perfect.
She remembered her last summer session with more gaps of Shouyou. It would be almost identical again. Only this time he had a good team now to back him up. His motivation had only been fueled by the intensity that his teammates and new friends surrounded him with. She had seen how much Karasuno was fairing for him with the way he came back home always happy (and tired).
And while she was sad that he would be spending most of his time training Natsu was glad that he was getting stronger.
There was a confidence that was residing in his strides, his eyes became sharper as his own body was becoming a sharper weapon. Their regulated jogs were the same, Natsu could practically see the difference high school made for him. There was a refinement in the way he picked up his knees, and controlled his breathing. It was actually very informative to see the glimpses of Tooru’s style in their running. Takeru had recalled it when he saw her race the other kids before school finished.
“He’s giving you lessons huh.”
Natsu gulped down a good chunk of her water when she finished her turn. “That and Shouyou’s volleyball manager used to be in track.”
Walking away from their school was a blessing and curse. On one hand they were free, but they still had homework to do. They resolved it by going to the community center and do their hardest sections of their homework there before they would go have any fun.
After all, there wasn’t like forgotten homework and procrastination to ruin their summer break.
13. Hide and go seek
Her legs were still reeling.
The rush of adrenaline was pumping her body as she tried her best to stop herself from giggling. The green grass was tickling her arms and legs. She was sure that her mom would be mad when Natsu would come back home with grass stains on her pink tank top and yellow shorts. Her socks would be the same as they would be decorated with stains from the grass and dirt she stomped on. Her hair would be hardly kept intact, as a child in summer break had always equivalent to sharing endless reel of energy and skin kissed shades roaming in every inch of exposed spaces.
Her brother wouldn’t be that off with his own skin darkening from his runs. His own body would clock into the pattern of volleyball sessions that his club had previously organized. Their mom had already come to accept their appearances but there would always be that one sore part where she tusked about the condition of their clothes when they would come back home after a long day(s).
From her own musings she almost forgot about where she was until a brisk hiss was brought out from her lips.
The river was refreshing as it was cold when she got splashed by Takeru and Shouyou when she took one second longer than needed when she let her guard down.
“It’s so cold!”
Shouyou’s laugh was the closest and perfect distance for her to jump at him and push him into the body water with her. As the water hit them both she couldn’t help but swim up to laugh until her lungs hurt to see Shouyou being so close to her and have him playfully complaining about her quick thinking for dragging them both to the river. The rest of the rowdy Karasuno team and Seijou team were all hanging around.
(That kind of formation of these two teams hanging out had still a few Karasuno members being awed that it was happening in the first place.)
But for Natsu she was just happy that Tooru was slowly working with his own personal demons as he did his best to not instigate a verbal fight with Kageyama. There had been a few close calls since a petty Tooru was a determined Tooru when they were on the court. When they weren’t out training it was nice to see he was actually having a grand time with Karasuno’s captain as they were both swapping and comparing each other’s training regiments.
As the days progressed Takeru and Natsu were having fun helping Kiyoko and the other adults to feed and water the two teams. It was also interesting to watch how Shouyou and Tooru were more relaxed when either of them were in the same room. They have come along after their first initial awkward meetings.
And while neither Shouyou or Tooru would explicitly share what made them come together, Natsu was pleased. In the end, she had them talking, laughing and being friends themselves. That was that mattered in her views as she looked up at her summer break and saw the inner changings of her life. It had been a little skeptical for some but Natsu had been brought up to be optimistic. Like a game of hide and seek; everything that Natsu wanted and needed were always being ushered by the universe’s hands. Always so close to her hand’s grasp but fading from her touch when she got a whiff of their beginnings and influences.
It never made her stoop to failure (the fear though strong could never wrangle her for long). Step backs had always been a lingering concept but as a Hinata, she pulled away from every stone that wanted to ground her. Her mom and brother had taught her of that type of resilience of adapting and evolving.
Which was why now as the summer sun raged on and the river sprang on her skin Natsu reserved her entitlement to play the game with the universe.
14. Festivals + Movies
It almost felt like too much had appeared and passed since Natsu started the year. She looked at the progress of her friendship with Takeru and Tooru. In alignment to Tooru’s closest friends they had come around to learn about Natsu and in some regard, her older brother without her readily giving away too many embarrassing stories. (Even if was funny to imagine and see his face of them knowing some his childhood memories that Natsu fondly remembered.)
Tooru’s own compulsion to shush Iwaizumi when he gave Natsu some pretty good blackmail material almost made her laugh too hard, but it was his own secret promise that he shared with her and Takeru that made her install a pinky promise clause with them.
After each meeting and passing, Natsu and Takeru had both enjoyed their times when they played, watched and admired both teams. For her, it would be always intriguing to watch how similar and different each school was with volleyball. From the lack or surplus of fangirls edging in the gym or hallways or how each team was consisted with different auras of experience and greed to own the courts. It was simply its own prized experience to see Tooru in his element, as he shaped his own army. Then compared to Shouyou’s insane quick breaking the ground and ceiling when he flew. Each time Takeru and Natsu played a visit she was always blown away by each individual player.
As the lack of school tables and classes droned on it became a humble drabble to incorporate her hours as a guest to humor Ennoshita’s envisions of his filming hobby. The sets, the cameras and scripts captivated her. When she overheard about his productions and sweetly asked to read some of his works he provided her a binge read for a weekend. Her wicked smile and gleam in her eyes made him cast her in cameos and eventual huge role. (It would later prove that his love of film would made her seek his artist point of views again and again her life.)
But for now, Natsu continued her own contemplative pace with Takeru as they went along with Tooru and Iwaizumi (who only went to make sure Tooru wouldn’t go overboard) to an alien movie festival. Ennoshita would come around later the day since he had planned for a different direction of experiencing the day. Shouyou’s awes were in the background as they spent another twenty minutes of Tooru roping their group in a long-winded explanation of the event. It made her day as she saw him and Iwaizumi go into a mini debate of monster flicks and alien invasions. It became even more hilarious when Shouyou dubbed his own take of crossovers of those genres.
The three-way debate lasted until Tooru was entrapped into paying for lunch.
Besides the incline of merchandise that Tooru and Takeru produced it was Shouyou and Iwaizumi’s lucky rolls of a random lottery that made Natsu laugh out loud when Tooru saw the prizes they won.
(His face had said it all of the unfairness that they collected some limited edition signed merchandise when they weren’t even fans themselves of the franchise they won from.)
15. Brush strokes
Just as she was reeling back the smell of paint was ghosting underneath her fingernails.
It had been a couple of weeks since she’s touched her paint set. Natsu at first didn’t really understand why she was fussy. Only that somewhere deep in her brain her creativity was looming in a corner. The shapes were wobbly, the colors were bland or too bright and her own encased brewing ideas were desecrated. There was a loss of soul in her room.
It seemed that while she was expediting in her running her paintings were suffering.
A tipped scale that graveled her.
“Everybody has their off days.” Takeru had said it first when she lamented her weeks of not bearing anything good.
She remembered how her house was too quiet, of the walls enclosing her lungs and how Takeru’s own eyes were watching her closely. Shouyou was in the backyard setting the table for lunch outside while Tooru was in her kitchen getting the food. Takeru had stayed behind with her when she grabbed onto his arm.
“I know.” Her eyes were blinking too fast as she did her best to explain her struggle with her paint brushes. “But somehow it feels almost too dampening for everything too feel either too sharp or dull. It’s like whatever I try nothing looks right.”
She didn’t let go of his arm. Neither did Takeru push her away, he instead looked at her directly in the face. His voice made her look back. Somewhere in her shaky resolve she was happy that Takeru had continuously listened to her worries. There was a strong shield he had in his tone when he comforted her.
“Do you want to try that technique that helps you calm down last time?”
The next few days were the same. Natsu ate, ran, and sketched.
Most of her runs were good, but it was her fingers that couldn’t reach further than she wanted. It was almost too tempting to stop from thinking, to savor all her demons catching up with her. That where she stomped her foot. In the face of dissolving it was Takeru, Tooru and Shouyou that gathered around her room. They all shared their horrible drawings and spew even more terrible crossover storyboards. From their silly cartoons and subtler music playing Natsu slowly evaporated her fears.
It hadn’t happened over night. But eventually her hands produced better results. The colors starting conversing with the shapes. They started to compliment each other again and make stories again.
The brushes that she added were easier to control.
“I told you, you’d get there again.”
Natsu didn’t bat an eyelash.
The sun was out and hot as ever, while Tooru was with Shouyou hitting the volleyball in quick successions at the backyard. Takeru was sitting down drinking his water as he took one glance at her painting that she was working on. Her wide smile was prove enough that she was going to be okay.