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Of Promises and Apologies (With A Side of Chocolate Milk)

Summary:

He looked up, trying to keep his disbelief from showing as he realized the angel had moved to sit right next to him, kneeling as he brought the hunter out of his reverie. He froze as Gabriel reached up, touching his face, brushing away-

Tears, Sam realized. He had started crying, although he couldn’t tell when. He sniffed, wiping at his face before looking back up at the archangel. He was still bedraggled, still had that haunted look in his eyes; but with it there was determination, a spark of life, some piece of the old Gabriel. Sam almost feared looking away, was afraid that if he did, this apparent illusion of everything being okay would disappear.

Notes:

Soooo I've probably made enough fix its for this situation to last an entire year, but i went on tumblr aaaand shit happened. so, here is another one.

i wanted to do an actual kiss, but that's not where this idea took me, so close enough i guess? it Sabriel fluff and comfort, that's all that matters.

honestly, i made up the majority of this idea as i was laying in bad trying (not) to go to sleep. and i wrote the entire thing on three hours of sleep at 4 in the morning. so, that explains the randomness of it.
enjoy!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Sam wasn’t happy with his brother.

Well, he supposed he never really was, but this was one of those times where the urge to slap Dean upside the head was so strong, Sam was genuinely surprised that he was able to keep his hands to himself.

He had left to go find mom and Jack, with Ketch of all people, leaving Sam to wait for Cas and to take care of the broken archangel he was currently looking at.

Gabriel had snagged a marker from SOMEWHERE and had started marking up all the walls. They looked like simple Enochian letters, although Sam wouldn’t be surprised if they were actually an abstract spell to keep any and all demonic forces out.

He studied the archangel in the opposite corner of the room. Sam’s view of Gabriel was partially obscured by the nightstand the archangel was currently plastered up against, as if trying to blend into the wooden piece of furniture. Sam sighed, looking down at the gauze and antiseptic in his hands. He wasn’t sure Gabriel would let him anywhere near enough for him to do anything, but he had to try.

Knocking to announce his entrance (and flinching when the smaller man did), he slowly, carefully rounded the corner of the bed. Gabriel looked up at him, his face holding an almost uncanny resemblance to a dog hiding from its abusive owner. Sam gulped, swallowing down the hurt he felt at that as he kneeled, eyes never leaving Gabriel’s.

As soon as Gabriel saw the items in his hands, his eyes widened. He whimpered, curling in so tightly on himself that Sam was surprised he didn’t just disappear altogether. He was still about four feet away, but the second he tried to scoot even an inch closer, the archangel would stare intently at him, amber eyes shining gold in warning.

“Gabriel, I need to clean your wounds, or else they won’t heal!” he sighed in frustration once more as Gabriel let out a low growl, pressing himself impossibly tighter against the wall behind him. giving up, the hunter plopped down, legs stretching out in front of him as he placed the medical supplies to the side. After a minute of trying to maintain his calm, he turned his head towards the other man. Gabriel stared back, weariness in his expression matching the hunters.

Sam closed his eyes momentarily, sighing as he pulled his legs in, mimicking the archangels guarded position as he turned to face him. After a minute, he opened his eyes, channeling every ounce of guilt and pain he was currently feeling.

“I’m sorry, Gabriel.” he said, voice barely a whisper. Gabriel replied with a minute twitch of a single brow, mimicking the expression he had given Sam back at the Mystery Spot, when he had begged for Dean to be brought back. Sam struggled to push down those memories, the current whirlpool of emotions swirling through him making it difficult.

“I’m sorry for not searching, for not trying harder. We…. I thought you were dead.” Sam said, the change of tense making the interaction evermore personal. He continued.

“We went back, y’know. The next day, after we saw the tape. Dean told me I was stupid, that Lucifer might still be there, but…I needed to know.” he had looked away at some point, too embarrassed to look at the other man. He continued on, trying not to make it sound like he was rambling, forcing himself to slow down and not rush through the words spewing forth.

“When we got there, it….it was rubble. All the bodies were gone – but I looked anyway.” he ignored the heat rising up his neck, eyes flicking to Gabriel for a second as he heard a soft wheeze, most likely a sound of surprise.

“I found nothing – well, that’s not entirely true.” he did look up now, eyes meeting the archangel’s in earnest vulnerability. “Your wings…. the outlines were still singed into the ground. I think Dean was talking about something then, but…all I could focus on were those damn shadows, burned into the ground like some sick reminder.”

He shook his head, jaw clenching as he tried to explain his thoughts at the time to the archangel as simply as possible. “I felt…I felt every friend I’d lost, every person I’d killed, every mistake I made…. I felt it all when I looked at them.”

He jumped as he felt a hand on his, clammy yet gentle. He looked up, trying to keep his disbelief from showing as he realized the angel had moved to sit right next to him, kneeling as he brought the hunter out of his reverie. He froze as Gabriel reached up, touching his face, brushing away-

Tears, Sam realized. He had started crying, although he couldn’t tell when. He sniffed, wiping at his face before looking back up at the archangel. He was still bedraggled, still had that haunted look in his eyes; but with it there was determination, a spark of life, some piece of the old Gabriel. Sam almost feared looking away, was afraid that if he did, this apparent illusion of everything being okay would disappear.

But it didn’t. Not when Gabriel looked down, fingers intertwining with his own; not when he tugged at the hunter, wordlessly telling him to stand up; not when he leaned himself against Sam, his other hand fisted in his flannel. Looking down at the archangel once more, the archangel who was now standing and touching him, he realized this wasn’t an illusion. He could still see that spark of determination, of stubbornness, hidden deep in the recesses of Gabriel’s molten eyes.

A shake and an impatient huff snapped Sam out of his thoughts. He cleared his throat, wrapping the arm with the intertwined hand around his shoulders, reveling in the way Gabriel hesitantly melted into it.

“So…how about a shower? Some new clothes, maybe?” Gabriel glared at him halfheartedly, snorting. Sam replied with a bitchface of his own, slowly starting to walk forward as he guided the angel. “how about I find you some sugar afterwards?” the pleased hum he got in response made his lips twitch upwards.

“So we have a deal?” he laughed softly as he felt Gabriel nod against his side enthusiastically, pulling the hunter forward slightly in a gesture of impatience.

 

They ended up having to bring one of the library chairs into the shower.

This was mainly because Gabriel could barely stand on his own for half a minute, let alone 10. Sam made sure it was the one Dean usually sat in, smirking internally as he made himself a mental reminder to put it back in the same spot later. It was childish, he knew, but he was still pissed at Dean for reasons he couldn’t fully explain with words.

Freshly washed, and in clean sweatpants and a flannel that almost rivaled his old outfit in bagginess, Gabriel let Sam lead him back out to the library. He was a bit more stubborn when it came to staying there, though.

“What is it?” Sam asked, watching as the archangel frantically shook his head when Sam pulled up a chair. He followed the shorter man’s gaze to the portal, which Sam had both surrounded with a devil’s trap and a circle of holy fire, just to be safe. Sam’s face dawned in understanding, his gaze shifting back to Gabriel, who was eyeing the circle of holy fire like it was going to attack him. “Oh.”

“Okay…” he said, slowly backing as far away from the fire as he could as he led Gabriel to the kitchen instead. It didn’t go unnoticed when Gabriel tightened his grip on Sam’s shirt, pressing himself up against the hunter as close as possible.

They made it to the kitchen, where Gabriel claimed the nearest stool, shifting himself so he couldn’t see the flickering firelight behind him. He watched curiously as Sam rummaged through he cupboards, mumbling in frustration.

“Dammit, Dean…” he mumbled, coming up empty handed on sweets. The one time his brother didn’t have his usual stash of mini candy bars lying around was when Sam actually went looking for them.

Of course.

It was a damn shame, too; Sam had almost felt guilty about the shower chair.

Almost.

Sighing in frustration, he turned to Gabriel, studying him for a moment. An idea occurred to him, and he walked over to the fridge, skimming the shelves. He came up with one of the ingredients he needed, but…

“Hey Gabe?” Sam asked, turning to look at the archangel once more, milk in hand. Sam thought he saw a glimmer of humor cross his face at the nickname, but he decided not to comment on it. “How much grace do you have left, exactly?”

Sam cringed at the immediate look of fear and horror that crossed Gabriel’s face. He whimpered, shoulders tensing all the way up to his ears, eyes widening, shivers racking his body.

“Woah woah, hey,” he said, quickly setting the milk down on the counter as he put his hands up in what he hoped was a nonthreatening manner, “it’s okay, I don’t want anything from you.” Gabriel relaxed somewhat, although he didn’t stop shivering. Sam felt the morsel of rage he had buried from before roaring to life again, calling for Asmodeus’s blood. It terrified him to think of what exactly the demon had done to make an archangel cower in fear like this.

“I just ask, because, well…” he gestured to the milk, keeping his eyes on the other man as he reached for a cup, “Dean doesn’t have his usual stash of junk food right now, and I was going to make chocolate milk, but we don’t have chocolate syrup, so…” he rubbed the back of his neck, fumbling for an explanation.

Gabriel’s face lit up in understanding, and he stared at the jug of milk with a look that was way too serious for the topic they were currently on. He then looked up at Sam, who trying to look anywhere else, afraid of making a fool of himself any more than he already had. He wasn’t sure, but he could have sworn the ex-trickster’s trademark smirk passed across his face as he snapped, the sound almost deafening in the otherwise quiet kitchen. Sam looked down, biting his lip to stop a smile form forming as he saw the bottle of liquid chocolate next to the jug of milk. He only looked up once the syrup was pulled out of his sight, eyeing Gabriel as he essentially poured half the bottle of syrup into the glass. He snorted, causing Gabriel to look up.

“Do you want some milk with that chocolate?” he teased, grinning. It was a stupid joke, he knew – but he didn’t regret it, especially when Gabriel replied with a small smirk before pouring the milk in. Sam handed him a straw, which he used to stir the concoction together before taking a sip. The lewd moan that escaped his mouth as he downed half the glass in one gulp made Sam lose his one last shred of composure. He laughed harder than he had in Chuck knows how long, getting a half annoyed, half amused look from the archangel.

By the time his laughing conniption had passed, Gabriel was pouring the other half of the bottle in, using up the rest of the milk as well. Sam watched with no shortage of amusement as Gabriel downed that one too, albeit much more quietly. His face, in that moment, was the brightest Sam had seen it since he got here, an almost blissful expression taking up residence.

He puts the glass in the sink, and they skirted back around the portal to the hallway. This time, he coaxed Gabriel into his room. He didn’t know why, but the writing on the wall in the archangel’s room made him uneasy. They both sat on the bed, leaning against the headboard in companionable silence for a while.

“I’m glad you’re back.” he doesn’t know where the confession comes from, but he can feel the truth, the conviction behind the words. Gabriel looks at him for a long moment, as if pondering something. Before Sam can fully comprehend it, Gabriel leans up, pressing a gentle kiss to Sam’s cheek, lips chapped and timid.

Then, he does something even more shocking – he speaks.

“Thank you, Sam.” his voice is rough, cracking in some places, but at that moment it is a glorious sound to Sam. He looks over, and can see how serious Gabriel’s words are. “Thank you…. for everything.”

“It’s…. it’s no problem, Gabe.” he says, the nickname now rolling off his tongue easily. He blinks is surprise as the shorter man curls against him, hands fisting in his shirt once more. The side of his face is now pressed against Sam’s chest, and for the life of him he can’t figure out why his heart is beating so hard or how to make it stop. He hesitantly rests his chin on top of Gabriel’s head, feeling himself drift off as he relaxes.

It would be stupid of him to fall asleep while the portal is open, but he’s tired, and Cas is going to show up soon anyway. If he needed help with the portal, he could find Sam himself.

And with that last thought in mind, he drifted off, basking in the warmth of the archangel next to him.

 

Castiel walked through the bunker door about half an hour later, calling out a “Hello?” as he descended the metal staircase. Hearing no response, he walked further in, seeing the portal in the middle of the library, the holy fire ring surrounding it fading away. He replenishes it before going off in search of Sam.

His reaction to the news of Dean leaving had been almost the same as Sam’s; annoyance, anger, hurt. While it didn’t make sense for them to wait, it didn’t mean that either of them were happy about the outcome of the situation.

Walking down the hallway, he was about to call out once more when he noticed Sam’s door was cracked. He stopped, readying his angel blade before quietly opening the door.

He wasn’t sure what he had imagined from the news of Gabriel being back, but it wasn’t this.

Gabriel (or, what he assumed to be Gabriel; the shorter man’s face was buried in flannel) was all but curled up in Sam’s lap. Both were asleep, breathing softly. There was the occasional twitching from the smaller man, who would temporarily tighten his grip on the younger Winchester’s flannel before going still again. Sam’s head was resting on top of the archangel’s, his hands laying over the ones gripping his shirt.

It was…sweet, as Cas had heard other people say about similar instances. It was unexpected, yes, and Dean probably wasn’t going to be a fan. However, as far as Cas was concerned, Dean could piss off; Sam was happy, Gabriel was safe, and everything was going to be okay, one way or another.

He slowly backed out of the room, closing the door with a soft click. He walked down the hallway, intending to guard the portal until the pair woke up. He could tell they both needed the rest, based on how deep they were sleeping. Cas smiled softly at the memory.

Maybe Gabriel would be okay after all.

Notes:

Ayyyy while youre here y'all should check out my other story, "Wrong Side of Heaven"! i should be posting the next chapter of it today.

Also, hmu on instagram; ChaosSiren103

kisses!
Chaos

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