Chapter 1: Lady In Red
Notes:
Thanks so much to my readers and all those who have favourited, reviewed, story alerted, favourite author, or author alerted me. I appreciate it more than I can say! You guys ROCK! 🙂
*Slight spoilers for the Original Trilogy games
Disclaimer: Ace Attorney is property of Capcom, I am not the owner of Phoenix Wright or its characters, because if I were, Phaya would actually be together instead of only in my imagination and writing!
Chapter Text
“Maya!” Phoenix Wright called up the stairs. “Aren’t you ready yet? Gumshoe will be here any minute!”
“Five more minutes, Nick!” came the reply.
“That’s what you’ve said for the fifth time in the past two and a half hours!”
“OK, so then quit asking!”
“Mr. Nick, it’s not nice to rush the birthday girl!” came the tiny, disembodied voice of Pearl Fey.
The spiky-haired lawyer flopped into his desk chair and buried his face in his hands.
When will I ever learn not to argue with Maya Fey? I may be an ‘Ace Attorney’ in the courtroom, but in the past four years, I haven’t won a single argument or battle of wits with that girl! And it sure doesn’t help that she’s got a spirited nine-year-old acting as her defense counsel!
He scowled in the direction of the loft above his office—a residential space that had once been home to his former legal assistant and her little cousin. They had lived there until a few months ago, when Maya’s duties as Master of Kurain Village had finally called them back.
Their absence had been harder on him than he’d anticipated. Sure, they still kept in touch—letters, phone calls, and regular visits, sometimes weekly, sometimes biweekly—but it wasn’t the same. Not even close. He missed having them around every day, the chaos, the energy, and the warmth. They were, after all, the sister and cousin of his beloved mentor, Mia Fey. But more than that, they were family.
He’d grown deeply attached to Pearl, loving the adorable little spirit medium like a daughter. And Maya… Maya had been so much more than just a loyal employee during the three years they’d worked together.
She had been his rock.
His best friend.
His love.
Phoenix jolted abruptly.
Dang! Shit fire and save matches! Who let that thought in?!
He gave his head a shake so sharp he was pretty sure his grey matter legitimately rattled.
Frick on a stick with a brick—that sure escalated emotionally! No. Nope. Absolutely not. Rewind, delete, forget that ever happened. Brain, we’ve talked about this!
Of course, he loved Maya; she was the Chief’s kid sister, for crying out loud! That was how he’d always seen her.
But love her, love her? No! Absolutely not! Out of the question.
The girl had only been 17 when they’d first met—a scrawny, giddy, Steel Samurai-obsessed teenager who’d insisted on calling him “old man.” The idea of romantic feelings for her had been laughable.
The birthday girl suddenly materialized before him.
Then again, maybe not.
He’d been so lost in thought that he didn’t even notice he was no longer alone until an unexpected, dramatic throat-clearing made him suddenly jolt his head up. His jaw dropped open.
The Maya Fey he’d always known was petite—about five-foot-two—and forever clad in loose, lavender acolyte robes that concealed her impossibly skinny frame, despite her insatiable love for burgers and ramen. Her raven hair was typically pulled into a half-topknot, the rest flowing nearly to her waist, and her fringe—always just a bit too long—seemed perpetually on the verge of falling into her eyes, which sparkled with playful mischief more often than not.
She’d always been a cute kid, looking somewhat younger than her age, and Phoenix had done his best to mentally file her away as just that.
A kid.
In other words, someone he’d never looked at—never allowed himself to even consider—in that way.
Of course, certain events in the past couple of years hadn’t always allowed him to stick to that delusion. But he’d managed to maintain his composure—and the boundaries of their friendship—at least on the surface, to both Maya and the rest of the world; Pearl notwithstanding. The innocent but somehow precocious child had always insisted they were each other’s
“Special Someone,” and neither the lawyer nor the psychic possessed the heart to shatter her idealistic illusions.
Now, staring at the woman in front of him, the spiky-haired man wasn’t sure he could have denied it, even if his life depended on it.
His reaction was ludicrous, Phoenix sternly told himself. He’d seen his friend plenty of times since she’d moved. Usually, he made the trip to Kurain—it was easier for him to take the train up than to have the girls come down to L.A. And since she’d gone on to assume the Master role, he’d even seen her wear clothes that weren’t the shapeless robes of her training days. Her ceremonial kimono and purple regalia, worn with the dignity of her new title, were undeniably more figure-flattering. Her hair, now always styled in a graceful bun, completed the transformation—framing a face whose youthful angles had softened into something… well, stunning. Elegant. Ethereal.
Her skin was porcelain-smooth, her features now almost sculpted, like something out of an ancient painting. And Phoenix Wright, Ace Attorney, was officially out of his depth.
So yes, Phoenix had absently noted that the cute kid he’d always known was now grown-up Maya, whom puberty had been kind to, but in a detached manner, the way one admired a valuable piece of artwork that could be looked at and never touched.
There was a world of difference, however, between seeing Maya Fey in clothes that were ‘figure-flattering’ to downright ‘flaunting!’
The birthday girl wore a scarlet mini dress, crafted from dazzling sequins on the strapless bodice, which enhanced a shockingly near Mia-worthy bust, while the fitted skirt fell over the hips and thighs, with a flourish of delicate chiffon flowers decorating the hip-length hemline of the garment, which left no shadow of a doubt that the formerly coltish teenage frame had now been filled out by nature into lush and ripe curves in all the right places.
The unrecognizable creature that he’d always tried to dismiss as Mia’s baby sister was looking very adult indeed!
Phoenix gulped, knowing he was staring, in a bizarre haze of mesmerized shock, and his heated face was probably the same shade as the killer dress, but he couldn’t seem to help himself from keeping his mouth still slightly agape as he took the rest of the ensemble in.
A small satiny black evening bag was looped over the wrist of one well-manicured, crimson-tipped hand, adorned with gold bangles, and perfectly matched her black pencilled heels. Red gloss was slicked over impeccably lined Cupid’s bow lips, which were formed into a smile of anticipation as she waited for him to speak.
“Take a picture, Nick; it’ll last longer,” Maya teased when it seemed to become apparent that his helplessly tongue-tied state still hadn’t abated.
Desperate to avoid looking at her like some ravenous horndog, Phoenix reluctantly tore his gaze away from the bodice of the dress and instead focused on her exquisite, infuriatingly beautiful visage—in a last-ditch effort to find something, anything, comfortably familiar.
Big mistake. Big. HUGE. Yup. I am officially doomed.
Her dark eyes, immaculately made up, were even more hypnotic. The sweep of golden-black shadow across her half-lidded gaze, paired with thick mascara on those long lashes, gave her a smoky, dramatic, almost feline look. He stared—too long—into those dark eyes and immediately regretted it.
The dress had been dangerous. The eyes? Fatal.
And just like that, I forgot how to breathe.
There was no coming back from this.
Phoenix was irrevocably mesmerized by the deep swirls of brown that coloured her pupils: molten copper scattered swirling mahogany depths that he felt hopelessly lost in, with no chance of escaping.
And God help him, he never, ever wanted to look away.
This fanfiction is dedicated to my wonderful and loyal reader, FelpzzzX on fanfiction.net, who loved this story so much he decided to turn it into a visual novel! You can find the first two chapters of this story of his WIP here: NOT A GIRL, NOT YET A WOMAN VISUAL NOVEL
Chapter 2: Take My Breath Away
Chapter Text
Wright & Co. Law Offices – April 17, 8:15 PM
Maya, at this point, had abandoned her smile of anticipation in exchange for a look of complete perplexity. Noticing the attorney still hadn’t replied to her teasing quip made her wonder exactly what was going on in his head. He continued gawking as if he’d never laid eyes on her before; rather than looking admiring, as she’d so desperately hoped, he looked positively
gobsmacked instead!
She was starting to feel a tad self-conscious now.
Had she gone overboard with the makeup? But she’d worked so hard to thoroughly replicate the careful instructions the girl at the cosmetics counter had given – she had even jotted down notes while Pearly had drawn pictures! Was the red too daring or vibrant for her pale coloring? The saleswoman in the department store had so convincingly assured her that “men loved red” and that the combination of the color and cut of the dress would get any man’s blood pumping!
So why was her best friend looking at her like a gasping fish out of water?
Mercifully, Pearl saved the day for both of them, finally breaking the awkward silence. Bouncing in front of the lawyer, she rolled up her sleeve and glowered at Phoenix. “Mr. Nick! Aren’t you going to tell your Special Someone how beautiful she looks right now?”
Grateful for the excuse of diversion to finally stop ogling Maya like a lame, love-struck teenager, Phoenix shifted his gaze to the little girl, smiling despite himself at the furious furrowed brow marring her doll-like face, and finally found his voice.
“So, this is what you wound up getting when you girls dragged me around the mall for five hours today, huh?”
“Four and a half!” Pearl corrected, momentarily forgetting that Phoenix still hadn’t answered her original question. “Mr. Nick, you did offer to buy Mystic Maya whatever she wanted for her birthday! You handed over your credit card around noon, and I remember exactly what you said: ‘I’m going to the electronics store—meet me there whenever you’re done. Go nuts!’ ”
Ah, from the mouths of babes. Unfortunately, it was true. Phoenix had been stumped about what to get a 21-year-old—he’d sworn off buying her any more Steel Samurai or Pink Princess paraphernalia on principle, deeming it unfit for a woman now old enough to drink! Instead, he offered to take the girls shopping for Maya’s outfit, deciding that would be his gift to her.
After an hour of being dragged through at least a dozen clothing and shoe stores—with still no purchases made—Phoenix had officially reached the end of his tether. The final straw came at the cosmetics counter, where the salesgirl insisted he try the new men’s makeup line, suggesting a bit of bronzer to highlight his “high cheekbones.” When he refused, she promptly, and without warning, painted his right thumbnail with a coat of gunmetal-grey male polish.
After spending the next 15 minutes in the men’s room peeling it off, the disgruntled lawyer had curtly handed Maya his Visa and told her to “go nuts,” and announced he’d meet them at the Best Buy.
In hindsight, he knew he had no one to blame but himself. He’d let the shameless spendthrift, Maya Fey, loose with his credit card?! Clearly, he was the one who needed his head examined! What had he been thinking?!
They’d finally reconvened at the electronics store three and a half hours later, and the moment Phoenix spotted Maya—laden with half a dozen tissue-paper-festooned bags—he broke into a cold sweat. He didn’t even want to think about his next credit card bill. Without a word, he’d hastily steered the girls toward the exit, his dreams of buying a new cell phone for himself officially crushed.
And somehow Maya had still managed to con him into getting them Samurai dogs for lunch on top of that!
Now, looking at the results of the whole shopping excursion/ordeal, Phoenix finally understood the ‘well-worth-the-money’ mentality. His beloved 50-inch plasma TV he’d finally splurged on for himself, even paled in comparison. He thought he’d never seen his hard-earned dollars look so well-spent in his entire life. And no price tag could ever be put on the megawatt smile Maya was now bestowing on him as she did a little twirl.
“You’re so great, Nick! Thanks again for getting me this…I didn’t break the bank too much, I swear!” She fidgeted with the neckline of the sequined bodice uncertainly. “Although I really could have, since you didn’t give me a limit! Yes, I know it took me a day to get ready and find the perfect dress that ‘called me’, but…what do you think, Nick?”
Maya knew she was deliberately compliment-fishing, a tactic she was loath to do, but getting a direct compliment out of Phoenix seemed to be as likely as Larry Butz keeping a girlfriend longer than a fortnight.
Desperate times called for desperate measures.
“You look amazing! Just look at you, Pal! All grown up now!” A familiar voice boomed from the doorway.
It was Dick Gumshoe, welcomed in by Pearl while Maya had been trying to coax the defense attorney into commenting on her ensemble—preferably with something that had nothing to do with price tags or how long she’d taken to get ready!
“Gumshoe!” The lady in red squealed joyously, rushing over to hug her old friend and momentarily forgetting Phoenix (who was grateful for his second reprieve that evening). “It’s been so long! You look great! Is that a new jacket?”
“Ya, the wife got it for me,” The stocky detective grinned shyly and ran a hand through his shaggy brown hair, while the other proudly adjusted the camel-colored trench coat, a vast improvement over the shabby green one that had been part of his usual attire. “Sorry to be a little late. I had to pull over at a coffee shop twice on the way over here for the other half.”
“Yup, definitely my fault! We mamas-to-be always need the potty. It’s the never-ending story,” chuckled a voice behind him. A petite, pert brunette, heavily pregnant and glowing,
waddled from behind Gumshoe and gave a quick hug to Phoenix and Pearl before warmly embracing the birthday girl. “Happy Birthday, Maya!”
“Maggey!” The diviner squealed, squeezing the flatfoot’s wife exuberantly. “I’ve missed you so much! You look fabulous. When’s little Gordy due?”
“Three months,” Maggey Gumshoe, née Byrde, replied proudly, resting a hand on her swollen abdomen. “Although with first babies, you never really know—it could be later, or earlier. I’m so sorry to miss your birthday festivities tonight, but a crowded bar just isn’t the most comfortable place for me right now, considering how huge I already am. And it’s not like I can drink anyway. I’m just glad I still got to see you on your special day! I love your whole outfit—you look so sophisticated! Is it new?”
The raven-haired beauty nodded happily and did another little twirl.
“Nick got it for me as a present, because as of this day, I can finally legally drink with the big boys! 21 today! Do l look the part?”
“You look like a gorgeous Hollywood starlet in that dress.” Maggey’s eyes shone with warmth behind her glasses. “Don’t you agree, sir?”
Both Gumshoe and Phoenix looked up at the inquiry, as the former police officer/waitress/ ‘Goddess of Misfortune’ had been known to address many people by that title, including the cop pre-courtship days, on occasion. In this case, though, her query was directed at the lawyer, who had finally run out of ways to dodge answering this line of questioning.
“What was that, Maggey?” He asked, while hoping she wouldn’t repeat the discomfitting question.
“The dress, Pal,” Gumshoe spoke slowly as if talking to a confused small child. He gave Phoenix a strange look. “My wife was asking if you like Maya’s dress?”
“Oh, well, um…” Phoenix glanced idly at the spirit medium, struggling to find words that wouldn’t reveal what he so greatly hoped to conceal. “I don’t know, isn’t it a little, er…tight? I mean, Maya, how are you getting any air in that thing?”
He nervously ran his finger along the inside of the collar of his Polo shirt, which was the same midnight blue as his eyes. He prayed his face didn’t give away his true thoughts, which were that he was the one having trouble breathing!
“What? Tight?!” A look of annoyed indignation flickered across the necromancer’s pretty face. “Are you saying it makes me look fat or something?”
“No, he’s not!” Pearl gave the blue attorney an unprecedented sharp jab in the arm. “He would never mean to say something so mean to Mystic Maya … would you, Mr. Nick?!”
Phoenix winced in pain and rubbed his bicep. For such a tiny little thing, Pearl sure could punch (and slap!) hard.
“Of course not!” He denied, awkwardly scratching the back of his head and offering them all a sheepish smile. “I just meant it’s, um… small—as in, not enough material! I mean, enough to cover you! Just… not enough to keep you hot! No—warm! Warm! Because it’s going to be cold tonight, and you should really wear a jacket!”
Feeling every bit the babbling buffoon he knew he sounded like, he snatched his light jacket from the nearby coat rack and draped it over the village leader’s bare shoulders.
“Cover yourself up—you could catch your death otherwise!”
The four of them stared at him as if he’d acquired a second head.
“I am not wearing a jacket!” The visibly peeved Kurain head exclaimed, shrugging out of the offending garment, uncaring that it drifted to the floor. “This is a dress that’s meant to be seen!”
“It’s springtime in LA, Pal,” Gumshoe assured him. “And it’s 27 degrees Celsius out tonight. I’m sure she’ll be fine.”
Things were getting way out of hand, and Maya was desperate to change the subject at this point.
“Let’s get going, shall we?” The Burger Queen trilled, with a forced cheerfulness she no longer felt. “It’s getting late and we don’t want to keep the others waiting.”
She gave the pregnant woman and her cousin a huge hug as she headed for the door.
“Thank you so much for watching Pearly tonight so that your husband could come join us. You’re such a gem, Maggey. Pearly, be a good girl for Mrs. Gumshoe, OK?”
“I need the babysitting practice, and besides, Pearl is an angel, so it’s no problem at all!” The mommy-to-be waved her hand dismissively at the gratitude and gave her husband a quick kiss. “I’m just happy that one of us at least gets to represent tonight. Have fun, you all!”
The group was just about to head out when the pint-sized acolyte made it clear she wasn’t about to let the matter drop. She planted her feet like a tiny, robed prosecutor who’d just found a contradiction as she looked up at the defense attorney.
“Why do you want Mystic Maya to cover up her dress, Mr. Nick?” The child looked like she was about to cry. “I’m the one who helped her pick it out. I thought she looked so pretty in it. Don’t you like it?”
Phoenix felt like the world’s biggest heel. In his lame efforts of trying—and failing—to play it cool with his former assistant, he’d somehow managed to upset the little girl he adored more than anyone else in the world. Bending down, he ruffled the original Phaya-shipper’s silky, light-brown hair, then drew her close in a gentle, one-armed hug.
“Of course, I like the dress, Pearls. I just worry too much about your cousin … always have, always will. But she’s a big girl now and can wear what she likes.” He smiled faintly at his friend. “The dress is very…nice, Maya.”
The youngest Fey beamed, seeing this as high praise indeed. Gumshoe and Maggey also smiled at the disaster averted, and Maya had a grin plastered on her face as she
murmured her thanks. Inside, however, she was inwardly fuming.
Nice?! She silently screamed. Three hours spent on my hair, my nails, and my makeup, and I get told my dress looks nice? Nothing about me in it at all? Would it kill him to just lie to me at this point and say that I look gorgeous?!
She halted her thoughts and gave her head a firm shake.
What in Mystic Ami’s name was wrong with her?! It wasn’t at all in her nature to be demanding and act like a prima donna!
It has to be due to the dress; red obviously just makes me assume a more diva persona!
That had to be the reason, Maya tried to convince herself, why she felt so dejected and ready to cry at the lukewarm compliment Phoenix had essentially been coerced into giving her.
Happy Birthday to me, indeed.
Chapter 3: Enter The Edgeworth
Chapter Text
The Borscht Bowl Club—April 17, 9:15 PM
The Borscht Bowl Club was a charming Russian restaurant, set in a double-story stone-walled building, with tiled mosaic floors. On the lower level was a quaint tavern, featuring blue-tin ceilings and red velvet walls, mingled with twinkling chandeliers. Patrons sat, laughing and drinking merrily, at oak tables, equipped with plush velvet chairs. In the centre of the room was a fully stocked bar, flocked by three busy bartenders and half a dozen wait staff. The focal point of the room was in the far right corner, which boasted a gleaming ebony baby grand piano. Sitting at it, tickling the ivories, was a palpably tone-deaf young man with slicked-back blond hair, clad in a cheap tuxedo. He was, loudly and painfully, caterwauling along to the playing of his swing-style tunes. He didn’t appear to take requests—although Maya would have been glad enough if he had succumbed to her repeated silent requests to shut the holy hell up and please cease butchering Frank Sinatra already; Slick Boy was an adequate pianist but truly an atrocious singer!
All in all, that Saturday night, the Borscht Bowl had a bustling bar atmosphere, flanked by scantily clad waitresses in black booty shorts and sleeveless cropped white blouses with a ruffled design in the front, accented with a black tuxedo tie. It was crowded and noisy and so chilly that they may very well have been in Moscow, if not Siberia! Although she was reluctant to admit it, Maya was starting to regret her stubborn refusal of Phoenix’s jacket within five minutes of the threesome arriving at their table.
He noted the goosebumps rapidly forming on her bare arms.
“Are you OK, Maya?” While his voice was filled with genuine concern, a knowing glint lurked in his sapphire eyes.
Maya pouted as she rubbed her hands up and down her bare arms. “I guess they wanted to ensure we had the full wintry Russian experience! It is positively frigid in here! I can practically see my breath, Nick!”
Phoenix couldn’t withhold a smirk. “So, you’re saying you wish you’d taken my advice and worn a cover-up, are you?”
“Oh, shut up, Nick!” She muttered irritably, pretending to be madder than she really was while barely suppressing a shiver. Still, being angry was making her feel a tad warmer. Not much, but a little.
Heavens to Betsy, she hated when he was right! And the fact that Phoenix was standing there, all toasty and comfortable while she was shivering and miserable, only added insult to injury. Did he have to stand there, radiating heat like that? The top two buttons of his snug, short-sleeved shirt weren’t even done up, for crying out loud!
Maya quickly averted her gaze from the very masculine, tanned throat and the tantalizing hint of a broad chest she could see. Phoenix’s change from his usual blue suit and tie to casual, well-fitted jeans and a polo shirt was… dramatic, to say the least. He looked younger. More relaxed. And—hell, she may as well admit it to herself, if not to him—sexier than usual.
Not that she’d ever tell him that. No way. She’d rather die than give Mr. “Nice Dress” the satisfaction. Damn him!
“Sweet nipples of Lucifer, how are you not frozen?” She grumpily demanded, stepping almost nose-to-nose with him and poking a finger into his chest. She deliberately kept her eyes on his face, refusing to glance down at his (annoyingly impressive) physique. “What are you, Nick—some kind of human furnace? I have no idea how these waitresses haven’t dropped dead of hypothermia already, since they’re wearing even less than I am!”
“That’s because they’re already so freakin’ hot! They gotta wear something TIT-illating to show off their ASS-ets… amazing they haven’t melted the place down!”
The aggravatingly familiar voice behind her sent yet another spike of irritation down her spine. Maya spun around at this obnoxious comment, fully prepared to verbally annihilate the
jerk-face responsible, only to find herself face-to-face with Larry Butz, who was waggling his eyebrows suggestively and grinning foolishly at his own wit.
“Only you, Larry.” The lawyer grimaced and shook his head before the birthday girl could tell The Butz just how much of an ass he was! “More likely it’s because the hard-working young ladies are so busy running around that they have no chance to feel frozen. This place is busier than usual tonight. We still haven’t had a server come to our table yet.”
“Glad you could make it, Pal,” Gumshoe affably said to Larry, rising from his seat and shaking the other man’s hand. “We were waiting for everyone to arrive before we ordered the first round. Did you happen to see Mr. Edgeworth on your way in?”
“Nope, although the traffic out there is insane and there’s barely any parking,” Larry replied. “For all we know, Edgy may be out there right now wrestling for a spot. I’m sure he’ll be here soon enough.”
The artist, who, the last time she’d seen him, had preferred to be known as Laurice Deauxnim, finally settled his lecherous brown eyes on Maya, which grew to the size of saucers as they drank her in. He let out a low wolf-whistle of appreciation.
“Speaking of hot stuff… Somebody call 911! Holy tamale, Maya baby, you are looking muy caliente tonight!”
The diviner threw her head back and laughed at the effusive flattery, elaborately curled black waves cascading about her bare shoulders like an inky, glossy waterfall. Whatever
annoyance she’d been holding onto moments before melted away instantly.
“Larry Butz, you kill me!” She rasped between giggles, leaning over to plant a quick kiss on his cheek. “You’re completely loco, amigo, but muchas gracias for the compliment. You just totally made my night!”
At least someone notices and appreciates my efforts! She added silently. Even if it is Larry!
“Me, crazy? I’ve been called worse.” Larry leered at her lasciviously. “But not in this case, Mama Cita! You’ve filled out in all the right places! I mean, dang, Maya—those knockers are
mucho grande! How the heck are they even staying up?!”
Phoenix’s face, already redder than he’d have liked, went full puce. He shot his childhood friend a death glare.
“Holy granoly, Larry! What in the name of Frank Sahwit’s simian-butt toupee is wrong with you?! Try—just try—to pretend you’ve got an ounce of shame and shut off that hose of yours!”
Before I tie a permanent knot into it!
“I must agree with Wright on this one, Butz.” The smoothly refined, instantly recognizable voice came from behind them. Miles Edgeworth stepped forward, arms folded, every syllable precise. “Cool your jets and have some dignity, man! This is a fully packed establishment—surely you can find some other unsuspecting woman to salivate over and practice your
questionable Spanish on without poor Miss Fey becoming a victim as well.”
Everyone turned toward the long-awaited arrival of Miles Edgeworth—High Prosecutor, occasional rival and longtime friend to Phoenix, reluctant acquaintance of Larry, boss to Detective Gumshoe, and fellow Steel Samurai enthusiast in Maya’s inner circle.
As usual, Edgeworth was dressed in his trademark magenta suit and snowy white cravat. Regal and debonair, with ever-perfect greyish-black hair and sharply patrician features, the prosecutor in his late twenties had always attracted his share of female admirers. He, however, seemed blissfully oblivious to most of them—Wendy Oldbag, a.k.a. The Wicked Witch of the Witness Stand, being the glaring exception. The only passion the workaholic former “demon prosecutor” had ever shown was for his work and the law.
Or so it had always seemed—such seemed to be the case no longer.
Tonight, a distinctly feminine, yet oddly familiar, silhouette lingered in the dim light behind him.
Edgeworth stepped aside, revealing his companion—and in an instant, the group’s smiles froze into expressions of wide-eyed shock. The tall prosecutor pulled the figure to his side with unmistakable possessiveness before graciously inclining his head toward Maya.
“Please accept my sincere apologies for arriving late on this festive occasion, Miss Fey. My companion this evening had a last-minute overseas conference call she was obliged to attend. Might I add that you look most fetching tonight?”
He gave a small, courtly bow—an act that would have looked absurd on anyone else, but on the urbane Edgeworth, came off as effortlessly, swoon-worthily chivalrous.
“To atone for this, however unintentional, faux pas, allow Franziska and me to purchase the first round of drinks for everyone.”
The Ace Attorney and the spirit medium’s jaws dropped to their chests in perfect unison.
Franziska von Karma? The whip-wielding, perfection-obsessed prodigal prosecutor?!
The silver-haired German harpy—despite being Edgeworth’s foster sister—was hardly a friend to anyone in the room. Phoenix certainly hadn’t been the one to extend an invitation to her that night!
Holy fire ants in a urethra! What on this godforsaken chunk of rock possessed Edgeworth to bring her to Maya’s birthday party?
The birthday girl’s gaze flicked to her ex-boss again, her troubled expression as plain as day.
Worst. Birthday. Ever
Chapter 4: A Southern Screw
Chapter Text
The four friends stood there, forming an unblinking, four-person wall of silence that seemingly lasted for eons. In reality, the stunned eight-eyed stare at the two newly arrived prosecutors could only have been a few seconds—though it stretched on like a bad cross-examination.
Surprisingly, it was Larry who recovered first.
“Edgy, my man!” He lunged forward with his usual gusto and grabbed Edgeworth’s hand, frantically shaking it up and down as if pumping for water. “Long time no see! And Franzy! Looking good as usual!” He then lurched towards the infamous whip-wielding lawyer and crushed her against him in the world’s most awkwardly suffocating clasp.
Franziska visibly cringed at the unexpected and evidently unwanted contact.
“Unhand me, you fool!” She hissed. Amazingly enough, though, she didn’t reach for her ever-ready weapon to enforce her command. Instead, she just looked helplessly about her, the desperation in her eyes so acute that the diviner couldn’t help but pity the other woman, in spite of everything. After all, who actually wanted to be smothered against The Butz?
“Mr. Edgeworth, no apologies required. Better late than never, right?” Maya dragged together the rags of her composure and wedged herself firmly between her friend and his
date, who was still locked in The Butz’s stifling embrace.
The act had the required effect of forcing Larry to loosen his clutch so the German woman could wrench herself away. Franziska stood there, panting slightly and looking simultaneously relieved yet winded, while Maya put her arms around the comely prosecutor for a quick, though nowhere near as unwarranted or inappropriate, hug. Edgeworth returned the friendly gesture readily, albeit somewhat stiffly. Despite his fondness for the birthday girl, he had never been the fuzzy, physically affectionate type with anyone, even though they all knew he was a big softy under his occasional lofty exterior.
Turning then to his companion, the psychic put on her most disarming smile, as if being congenial to the Frau who had twice tried to have her wrongfully incarcerated for murder and then showed up impromptu at her milestone birthday was the most natural thing in the world.
“Miss Von Karma, so glad to see you after all this time,” was her gracious greeting to her unwelcome guest. “While this is the most pleasant of, ah, surprises, we’ve always believed in ‘the more, the merrier’ concept. Haven’t we, Nick?”
The gentle prod had the desired outcome of Phoenix finally snapping out of his gaping stupor and looking sheepishly at the two. “Absolutely,” he agreed heartily, shaking Edgeworth’s hand and flashing Franziska his most shit-eating grin. “Welcome, guys. It’s been a while, huh? We were just getting ready to order. You look lovely tonight, Ms. Von Karma. Is that a new dress?”
So he’s not completely incapable of giving compliments to women, it would appear. Maya reflected grumpily, all the while hating herself for being so uncharacteristically catty about such things. Just me, apparently. I don’t want to be so spiteful as to not acknowledge that the turquoise knit dress makes her look less intimidating than her customary black garb. Nevertheless, it’s a conservative, long-sleeved, turtleneck design! I’m dressed to kill…and even wearing a push-up bra! Yet still…nada. Not even a second glance.
Everyone seated themselves at the table, and Franziska smiled stiffly at Phoenix’s earlier praise, as if the motion was unnatural for her. Given her tumultuous courtroom history with the defense attorney, a snarl was probably much more customary, though in this instance, hardly appropriate.
“Danke, Phoenix Wright,” she replied coolly. “It is something new that I picked up in Germany a sennight ago. While it is also springtime over there, the weather is still chillier than here in Los Angeles this time of year. Although considering the arctic temperature of this place…” she added pointedly. “I am most glad to be covered up somewhat, unlike your poor companion there, who is practically nude in comparison and appears to be morphing into a Smurf before our very eyes. Did you not think to tell her she may need a cover-up in this kind of environment?”
Phoenix looked flustered, although it was uncertain if it was due to the unsubtle complaint about his choice of venue, or the reference to said semi-scantily clad companion next to him, whom he was still avoiding looking at.
“I-I, well, um, I offered her one…” he stammered.
Thankfully, Edgeworth gallantly saved them from further embarrassment by cutting in.
“Wright is not her keeper, Franziska,” he admonished lightly. “Miss Fey is a grown woman now and can wear what she likes. I can certainly understand her wanting to be in her element on her special day and not be cloaked like a nun. And while it is a tad cool in here, it is nothing that will not be remedied by some warming liquor. I shall flag down a waitress to get that first round I promised everyone.” He stood up and signaled to a server in the distance, waving her over to them.
Maya flashed a grateful smile at Edgeworth, even though she was smarting internally from the other woman’s barbed remarks, which stung nearly as much as her whip would have.
Frigid, poisonous bitch! Nearly nude indeed! It’s not my fault she dresses like some Victorian-era senior even though we’re supposedly the same age. What hurt almost more was that Phoenix had neither defended her nor spared her a second glance to seek the validity of the onslaught. Although I may as well be dressed up in a habit, for all the good this dress did. Besides, if she thinks I’m indecent, wait till she sees what the waitresses here are wearing!
Gumshoe was also in the knight in shining armor mode that night.
“Phoenix bought Maya that classy dress, sir,” he informed Franziska. “For her birthday. It definitely was one that deserved to be seen. I gotta tell ya though, she’s pretty covered up compared to the staff here.”
If the scruffy detective hadn’t already been hitched to the most adorkable, wonderful woman on the planet, Maya would have married him on the spot. She flashed him a thankful grin across the table, and he sent her a surreptitious wink back.
Their waitress finally appeared at their table, and at the sight of the Pamela Anderson-circa Baywatch days-doppelganger, all the men at the table suddenly morphed from Sir Lancelot mode into a gratuitous gawking one. Although Maya certainly couldn’t fault them for this, as she was guilty of such herself!
The busty blonde standing before them was donned in black tuxedo shorts that were so tight they appeared to have been spray-painted on. Her sleeveless ruffled white blouse, which looked almost identical to Edgeworth’s cravat, was cropped, showing a firm, tanned midriff, fitted just enough to afford them all a view of her ample bosom, which appeared to require no aid of a push-up bra. Black fishnet stockings covered long, shapely legs that appeared to go up to her armpits, set off by black stiletto heels. At her neck, she wore a tuxedo bow-tie, and a small black top hat sat perched atop her platinum curls, which tumbled around her tanned face and down to her shoulders like a halo.
However, there was nothing angelic about the way her long-lashed blue eyes were now ravenously devouring Phoenix, sitting at the front end of the table, as a provocative smile curled upon her plump, glossy lips.
“Why, hey there, handsome,” she purred in a honeyed Southern drawl, letting her magenta-colored talons trail lightly over his bare forearm. “Well, ain’t this a surprise? Where’ve you been hidin’, sugar? I’ve missed you somethin’ fierce.”
Phoenix blushed furiously but made no move whatsoever to remove the overly familiar hand or tear his gaze away from the pulchritudinous walking sex-on-a-stick.
“Tiffany! Hi! Ya, it has been a while, eh? Been crazy busy at the law office so I’ve not had much free time lately, heh heh.”
“Far too long,” Tiffany pouted. “Our grape juice supply has been at a surplus since the sweetest thing I’ve seen since I left Birmingham stopped visiting me.”
“Visiting her?” Maya echoed, her baleful gaze transfixed on the blonde sexpot, who was all but sitting in the spiky-haired man’s lap now as she perched her shapely hip on the edge of the table right next to him. “Nick, how do you know this person?”
“Nick?” A look of confusion flickered across the server’s artfully (yet over-painted) visage. “I thought it was Phoenix.”
“It is Phoenix,” he asserted. “Only my good friends call me Nick. And Maya, I um, used to visit this place a few times a month for a spell after you and Pearls moved back to Kurain. Tiffany was the one who usually served me.”
“Several times a week, actually!” The bombshell let out a tinkling laugh. “He’d be in here all weekend, drowning his sorrows in copious amounts of grape juice, for a good few months earlier this year. Always all by his lonesome, too. I can’t say I minded keeping him company during his visits, though.”
The waitress flashed the blue attorney a flirtatious wink.
“Sadly, he never seemed to stick around until I was done with my shift, though. I wouldn’t have minded the company of a gentleman myself after a long night’s work.”
Phoenix scratched the back of his head and grinned like a lovesick puppy.
“Ah, jeez, Tiffany, I don’t know what to say! You never said anything of the sort…”
“I thought it was obvious,” she cooed, batting her lashes. “What else is a shy gal supposed to do to get a cute fella’s attention?”
Maya was downright seething now.
If this broad is freakin’ shy, then I am the Pigmy Queen!
Somehow, from somewhere deep inside, she managed to summon a light, airy laugh—despite wanting to scream loud enough to rattle the windows.
“Tell me,” she said sweetly. “What’s a birthday girl supposed to do to get a drink around here? I hate to break up this little reunion, but we’re all feeling a mighty bit parched.”
Phoenix looked flummoxed at the assertion; it was as if he’d forgotten the rest of them were there. Tiffany at least had the decency to look somewhat abashed as she reluctantly stood back up and flashed the table a megawatt smile.
“Pardon me, y’all,” she cooed. “I didn’t mean to shirk my duties by getting so caught up seeing this ever-so-distracting stud muffin again. What can I get for you lot?”
A Screaming Nazi shot would have been my answer before Slutzilla here arrived, Maya fumed. But Franziska is definitely the lesser of two evils. At least she doesn’t drape herself all over Nick like a cheap, sleazy suit! I wonder if it’d go right past her overly bleached head or be a tad too obvious if I ordered an Alabama Slammer or Southern Screw?
Chapter 5: Bros Before Hos
Chapter Text
There was a myriad of reasons that Miles Edgeworth had long been touted not only as Phoenix Wright’s greatest courtroom rival but as a bona fide genius prosecutor. His uncanny ability to assess a situation in seconds—and react with calculated precision—was certainly one of them.
In this case, one glance at Maya’s murderous expression told him everything he needed to know. He could practically see the oncoming calamity if she opened her mouth to answer the waitress’s perfectly harmless question about drinks.
He beat her to it.
“We’ll have a round of Dead Lawyers, please,” he stated evenly, with a surprisingly straight face. “And thank you.”
Larry snorted. Maya, despite herself, let out a small titter as she glanced toward the blonde to see her reaction.
Tiffany blinked—once, twice—her mascara-heavy lashes batting like butterfly wings before she broke into a sunny smile.
“Well, slap my head and call me silly! I didn’t realize you men of law could be so sexy and have such a sense of humor! But seriously now, what can I get you folks?”
“I assure you, Miss, while I can certainly appreciate the comedic implications of the name, it is very much a real drink,” the cravat-wearer replied. “On the off-chance your bartender is unfamiliar, it consists of white crème de cacao, maraschino liqueur, and dry vermouth.”
He turned to Maya with a sardonic little smile.
“For the birthday girl’s glass, in particular… I believe a double is in order.”
“Mighty kind of you to hand over the recipe, sugar. Otherwise, I reckon this order would’ve had the bartender being more confused than a fart in a fan factory! I’ll try to scoot back quick with those drinks, but mercy, it’s busier’n a one-legged man at a butt-kickin’ contest tonight. Poor fella’s runnin’ around back there like a blind dog in a meat house! But you got my word—anything y’all want, y’all will get. After all, your wish is my command, fine sir… I mean, kind sir.”
Tiffany threw him another flirty little wink before sashaying off, hips swinging just enough to make it impossible not to notice.
The moment she did, Larry let out another wolf whistle and shook his head in wonder.
“Lordy, Lordy, have mercy! Forget your twins, Maya—how the heck are those funbags on that hose-hound defyin’ gravity?”
Edgeworth let out a rare, unguarded chuckle.
“While gutter-minded individuals may choose to dwell on Miss Tiffany’s… anatomical physics,” he remarked dryly, “I’m more intrigued by the apparent downgrade in decreed titles –Wright receives handsome, while I’m merely fine sir.”
“Silicone does not sag, you fool!” Franziska snapped, shooting Larry a withering glare before pivoting to fix her partner with an equally furious look. “And if I am not mistaken, I believe that inappropriate strumpet included both of you in her needless ‘sexy’ remark! Does that please you more, Herr Edgeworth?”
The chess-lover’s earlier chortle broke into an outright laugh as he regarded the stormy-eyed woman beside him – her expression now rivaling Maya’s from minutes earlier.
“Franziska, my dear, surely you’re not jealous of the harmless flirtations of a young lady merely trying to secure a generous tip?”
“So what if I am?” She huffed, crossing her arms. “That man-eater was about as ‘innocent’ as Dahlia Hawthorne! I thought it was bad enough she was on the verge of giving Phoenix a lap dance before Maya intervened—but to make innuendos to you, right before my eyes? That is an incredible display of disrespect! Did she not see the diamond ring on my finger?”
Edgeworth managed to stifle another laugh and put his arm around his irked fiancée, pulling her closer to him, although a glint of amusement lingered in his dark grey eyes.
“I assure you, meine Dame, I only have eyes for you. As proven by the rather obvious betrothal ring on your finger. So please, keep calm… and keep your whip tucked away tonight, as you promised me.”
The full weight of the exchange between the perfect prosecuties finally seemed to register with the rest of the table, though apparently, it sank in faster for some than for others.
“Sir, you and Mr. Edgeworth are engaged? Congratulations!” Gumshoe beamed.
“The old ball and chain, huh? Cheers to that! Wowee, Franzy, you could ice-skate on that rock! Way to go, Edgy!” Larry crowed.
“I’m so happy for you, Mr. Edgeworth and Miss von Karma! All the best!” Maya chimed in.
“Tiffany was not about to give me a lap dance! She was merely being friendly to me and Edgeworth, and you guys are the ones being disrespectful with your brazen comments! Wait—hold it! Y’all two are engaged?”
Unlike the ex-Demon Prosecutor, whose brilliance followed him both in and out of the courtroom, the other present legal mastermind seemed to leave most of his brain cells behind when the court wasn’t in session.
Now it was the village leader’s turn to be irate once more.
“Yes, Nick, Mr. Edgeworth, and Miss von Karma just made that abundantly clear! If your mind hadn’t been preoccupied with a certain pneumatic nympho all this time, you’d have caught on by now!”
Phoenix flushed at the accusation but gave her a look of mild indignation.
“How can you say something so slanderous about a woman you’ve only just met, Maya? You’re questioning her virtue with no evidence whatsoever!”
Maya’s cheeks colored too, though hers were all ire, not embarrassment.
“I think the better question here, Nick,” she shot back, “is why one of your best friends announces his engagement, and your priority is defending some hussy waitress instead of
congratulating him!”
And so went the ongoing battle of wits with Maya Fey—one Phoenix had yet to win. Score: Maya, 10,000. Wright, 0. Nevertheless, she was dead-on with this one, infuriating though she was being.
He turned his attention to the couple and gave them a genuine smile. “My apologies for my delay in conveying my happiness to you, lovebirds. Congratulations to you both.”
“Thank you, Wright,” Edgeworth replied wryly. “I’ll accept the world’s most delayed felicitation—on the condition that the next round of drinks is on you.”
“Deal,” Phoenix said with a grin.
“Maybe you’re right, Nick.” The spirit medium suddenly changed tactics and smiled sweetly at him, the earlier dispute between them apparently forgotten. “Perhaps I was too hasty in my snap judgments about your lovely friend. Hey, perhaps I’ve been wrong in judging quite a few people in my life. Take Larry here, for instance. I’ve always thought he was an irresponsible, goofy guy with a tendency to have terrible luck with the law as well as the ladies and should never be taken at all seriously…”
“Hello, I’m right here, you know!” The artist objected, scowling.
She disregarded this and went on.
“But as stated, maybe I was wrong to have dismissed him, and his previous declarations of affection towards me in the past! After all, in the last year, he’s evolved into a career as a well-respected artist of children’s books and even has a car now. Most of all, he hasn’t needed you to defend him in court on some bogus murder charge for at least the last couple of years…”
“Maya, where are you going with his?” Phoenix demanded, alarm beginning to creep into his voice now.
“I mean, I should follow your shining example of being so open-minded about people and giving them the benefit of the doubt!” She flashed him a dazzling smile before directing it towards Larry, who was all but swooning as he looked back at her with a dopey expression. “Larry, you’ve asked me out a few times in the past few years and made it clear you found me attractive way before I said yes to this dress.”
Maya tossed her satiny hair over her shoulder and looked meaningfully at her erstwhile employer before she continued.
“How would you feel about me taking you up on that offer? Assuming, of course, that it still stands?”
“Larry?” Phoenix gaped at her in disbelief. “Are you kidding me? Maya, tell me you aren’t serious. You absolutely cannot go out with Larry Butz!”
She arched a perfectly shaped brow. “Oh, I can’t, Nick? And why not, pray tell?”
“Yeah, Nick, what the hell? Why you gotta try to c-block your bro for?”
“Because!” Phoenix now had beads of visible perspiration forming at his temples. “Because, Larry, you are indeed my bro! You dating Maya is a direct violation of The Bro Code!”
“The Bro Code, Pal?” Gumshoe looked at Phoenix with a bewildered expression and scratched his head. “Is this some sort of legal code of conduct that we detectives just aren’t aware of?”
Edgeworth smirked and tapped his forehead. “Considering this legal code just materialized from the depths of Wright’s imagination and out of his mouth, Gumshoe, I would say surely not, as it is the first I’ve heard of it.”
“I did not make this up!” Phoenix protested. “It is an indisputable real deal and has several rules and regulations that legitimate bros, friends, if you prefer, under no circumstances, are to infringe upon. Look it up online!”
“Your rationale fascinates me, Wright. I believe I will do just that.” Edgeworth pulled out his smartphone and tapped a few times on the screen. “Eureka! I found it!”
He then looked up with a disapproving frown.
“Do not tell that you are actually going to try to use the beyond offensive clause of bros before hos in this instance?”
“What?!” Both Franziska and Maya shrieked in infuriated unison.
“No, not that one, Edgeworth!” The spiky-haired man cried, snatching the other man’s phone like it was Exhibit A in a courtroom trial. The screen still displayed the Bro Code site. “Take that!”
He exultantly rose from his chair and held the mobile device up high, like a trophy, while tapping at the screen
“This is the clause I meant! Rule 47: A bro NEVER, under ANY circumstances, makes a move on another bro’s girl!”
“Oh man… you’re right, Nick.” Larry’s shoulders slumped with surprising sincerity. “Respect. Although I kinda thought I already broke that rule years ago when I hit on Iris…”
“See?” The King of the Turnabout put his hands on his hips and smiled triumphantly. “I told you I didn’t make it up!”
“Objection!” Edgeworth interjected, his voice dry as sandpaper. “Well played, Wright. You would be within your rights to exile Larry from the island for attempting to date your ex-girlfriend… which, I must say, surprises me that you didn’t.”
“Edgy! What the hell?!” Larry yelped, looking genuinely wounded. “Do you people not see me?!”
“However,” the prosecutor continued with a smirk, ignoring the outburst, “Miss Fey is neither your former nor current lover. Therefore, your little clause here is, I’m afraid, completely inapplicable.”
With his euphoric glow of victory dimming like a flickering bulb, Phoenix slowly slunk back down on his chair, feeling like he’d just been cornered in court with a logic bomb he couldn’t defuse.
All that was missing was the Cornered Theme music.
After all, the prosecutor had spoken nothing but the truth, the defense attorney realized despairingly. Maya wasn’t his ex. She wasn’t his girlfriend. Legally, morally, and by the sacred laws of the Bro Code, he had no grounds to stop Larry from asking her out.
With a heavy heart, he looked forlornly at The Butz and then at the gorgeous young woman sitting next to him.
There’s nothing I could possibly do or say to keep from losing her at this point, he thought dejectedly. Nothing at all.
Chapter 6: Peter Stroker and Anita Lai
Chapter Text
Fortunately, Phoenix wasn’t given much time to wallow in his newfound misery, as Tiffany returned at that moment with a half dozen Dead Lawyer drinks on her tray and a beguiling smile on her lips.
“Here you go, y’all. Please pardon the delay, folks, I’ve been running all over hell’s half-acre tonight!”
The waitress busied herself by personally setting down everyone’s drink directly before them, saving Phoenix’s for last. She then “accidentally” brushed the side of her cleavage against the blushing lawyer’s face as she leaned over to place his drink down.
“Oops!” She giggled, looking the furthest thing from disconcerted as could be. “So sorry about that, handsome. How clumsy of me.”
“Um, no worries at all, Tiffany.” He turned an even deeper shade of crimson, grateful for the distraction from his earlier tormented thoughts. “At least you didn’t spill the drink on me or in my lap, right? Heh heh.”
The diviner quickly raised her glass to her face to hide her grimace at this exchange. A non-drinker, for the most part, she found herself cringing as she took a sip of the unexpectedly strong drink that was indisputably, as Edgeworth had requested, a double.
Aptly named drink indeed. Dead Lawyer and a dead spirit medium, if I have any more of this.
“Well, sugar, if I’m ever the cause of making your pants get wet, I’d have to ensure that I helped you dry them off, wouldn’t I?”
The diviner took her glass and tipped the entire remains of the drink into her mouth to keep her from saying anything regrettable, gasping at the fiery sensation going down her throat. Franziska caught her eye, looked over at the fawning waitress and Phoenix, discreetly wrinkled her nose in disdain, and pretended to stick a finger down her throat in a gagging motion. Maya spluttered with unexpected laughter, nearly spewing her drink out of her mouth.
Although if she had happened to have ‘accidentally’ spat the concoction all over Tiffany, as surely as the waitress had ‘accidentally’ brushed herself against Phoenix like a cat in heat, would it really have been such an epic tragedy?
Well, the horny bitch would finally have a lawyer all over her then, wouldn’t she? Maya giggled to herself as she barely resisted the temptation to fulfill her fantasy. Albeit the Dead Lawyer variety!
The exchange between her and Franziska was not missed at all by the ever-observant Edgeworth, who simply gave his fiancée a subtle nudge to the side and smiled conspiratorially at Maya, whose cheeks burned at having been busted. The expression on the prosecutor’s handsome face was a mixture of mirth and, to her chagrin, sympathy.
Also, quite possibly some relief, since the attentive waitress’s attentions were solely focused on Phoenix this time around. Of course, it probably helped that Franziska had very visibly rested her head on her fiancé’s shoulder and given him a can’t-miss kiss on the cheek the moment Tiffany had arrived at the table.
Maya couldn’t help but feel a twinge of envy and wistfulness at how easily the other woman was able to ‘mark her territory.’ She, of course, was in absolutely no position to ‘stake her claim’, since Phoenix wasn’t even her boyfriend, never mind fiancé!
Ergo, there she miserably sat, holding back her helpless frustration while idly trying to continue the conversation with the rest of the group. She discreetly ensured her back was turned to the gruesome twosome, while wishing she had another drink to help obliterate what was turning out to be the most atrocious of nights, even with the unusually benign Lady von Whippingberg on her best behavior!
Suddenly, a loud whoop was heard across the bar, and an adorable young man with curly auburn hair and glasses jumped up onto his chair, clanging a spoon against his glass and beaming from ear to ear as he did so.
“Everybody, may I have your attention, please!” The ecstatic guy crowed, cupping his hands around his mouth and using them as a megaphone. “My name is Peter Stroker. This gorgeous gal here is my brand-new fiancée, Anita Lai!”
He gestured to the female seated at his table, a sweet-faced Asian girl, who had her hands pressed up against her flushed pink cheeks as she smiled adoringly at him.
“Anita here has made me the happiest man on God’s green earth tonight because she has just agreed to be my wife! To celebrate the future Mrs. Anita Stroker, I’d like to buy a round of Mind Eraser shooters for everyone here…all on me!”
A Mind Eraser, the psychic thought in amused disbelief. I’ll certainly drink to that! Hope it’s as appropriately named as the last cocktail!
“Good heavenly days, that is so romantic, idnit?” Tiffany cooed, clasping her hands to her chest and swooning slightly. “Imagine a man loving a woman so much! Bless his pea-pickin' l’il heart!”
“I think he is quite the fool to be squandering so much money to celebrate with a room full of strangers whom he does not even know,” Franziska declared sanctimoniously. “I have never understood you foolish Americans needing to make every single aspect of your lives a larger-than-life public spectacle. Quite tacky.”
“His heart is in the right place, although I do agree this is a most frivolous expense,” Edgeworth agreed. “I also personally believe moments like this should be private.”
“I’m just happy to have a free drink!” Gumshoe laughed.
“Well, I happen to think it’s sweet,” Maya sighed. dreamily “Imagine having a man be so madly in love with his woman he doesn’t care if the whole world knows it!”
“You’d never catch me making a public spectacle of myself like that,” the defense attorney declared superciliously, puffing out his chest with self-righteous bravado.“I’m with Edgeworth on this one – Romantic declarations should be private—between two people, no audience required. There’s no need to get all over-the-top theatrical just because you love someone.”
Wow, the incredulous Larry thought, gawking at his best friend like he’d just been body snatched. Did one of the Pod People from Planet Tight-Ass abduct Nick and install Edgy as the onboard AI?!
He stared, bewildered, at the other man’s valiant attempt to rewrite his own dramatic history. But before he could blurt out something along those lines, Phoenix plowed on with his utterly baffling sermon.
“Besides,” he added with a lofty sniff, “we’re lawyers. We’re supposed to uphold the dignity of our profession – at least in public.”
What in the whole wide world of fuck?! Larry’s jaw actually dropped to his chest. Was Phoenix Wright, King of Chewing-Poisoned-Vials-To-Save-A-Girl-He-Loved, seriously preaching dignity right now?!
The artist opened his mouth, poised to object—probably with Exhibit A: That Time You Tried To Die Dramatically, Volume 3 – but then he spotted Gumshoe across the table. The detective caught his eye, gave the tiniest shake of his head, and shot him a look that clearly said: Let it go, Butz. Let it go.
Larry groaned silently and slumped back, slapping on the most tragic, wounded expression he could muster. He wasn’t allowed to call bullshit out loud, so the defeated man simply closed his mouth and instead adopted his signature kicked-puppy expression – one that silently screamed: et tu, Gumshoe?
“I don’t see what’s so terrible about telling the whole world how much I love my girl. That Stroker guy is just lucky the Lai chick said yes since he popped the question in public! I remember I proposed to a girl once,” he relayed glumly. “At a football game. I had the ‘will you marry me, Libby’ message spelled out on the blimp that flew above the crowd to make it extra romantic, too. But she still refused! She ducked out to the bathroom during the second quarter and never came back!”
“Wait, wasn’t that Libby Doe, back in high school, senior year?” Phoenix rubbed his chin with one hand as he made the recollection. “And wasn’t that only your second date?”
A loud snort of hilarity erupted from Tiffany just then, which she immediately tried to mask as a cough.
Maya shot her a dirty look. Yes, Larry Butz was a walking comic-tragedy of a man when it came to his love life, and they’d all had a few guffaws about it over the years. But for the waitress, who was a complete stranger, to do so struck her as most unkind. After all, they’d known and loved The Butz for years; despite all his shenanigans, he was their friend.
The sexpot caught the hostile glance and sobered slightly, rapidly morphing back into smiling bar wench mode.
“I’m going to get those Mind Eraser shooters for y’all now,” she said quickly. “Is there anything else you folks would like?”
“Hey, Pal, I know you said you’d get the next round, but I have to at least get the birthday girl her next drink,” Gumshoe told Phoenix. “Please bring back a beer for me and a Cosmopolitan for Maya, Miss. It was my wife’s favorite drink, but since she’s expecting and can’t have it right now, she made me promise that we’d have one for her.”
“Sounds good,” Phoenix smiled. “Tiffany, a round of beers and a Cosmo martini, please!”
“You got it, sexy.” The bar wench ran her nail lightly over his forearm and flashed her now customary wink before heading off. “I’m right on top of it.”
“And on top of him, no doubt, if she had her way.” The spirit medium hadn’t even realized she’d muttered the words aloud until Larry, who was seated next to her, nearly choked on his drink, trying to stifle his laughter. She blushed furiously at the slip-up; the cocktail she’d so hastily consumed had loosened her tongue dangerously.
“What was that, Maya?” The blue attorney asked, glancing over at the two of them with slightly narrowed eyes.
“Nothing at all,” she replied innocently, opting to forego decorum altogether and relieving Gumshoe of his barely touched Dead Lawyer, draining it in one gulp. No doubt the detective was trying to pace himself and had switched to a lighter beer, as he knew he’d be driving later that night.
The attorney frowned. “Isn’t it a bit too early in the game for you and Larry to already have ‘inside’ couple jokes?”
Is he for real? Maya thought, staring at him with exasperated disbelief. After enduring his and Tiffany’s grotesque little “mating dance” all night, Phoenix was seriously trying to play this card?
“Don’t you fret none, handsome,” she scoffed in her phoniest Southern twang, the drinks starting to warm her veins, though she wasn’t quite at full inebriation yet. “We’re light years away from being as close as you and your chummy octopus mate over there!”
Phoenix narrowed his eyes.
“Hold the phone! Just what is that supposed to mean?”
“Oh, gimme a break, Nick! Don’t you dare play dumb with me! She’s had her hands–hell, her whole body–all over you like white on rice the whole night, and you’ve been loving every minute of it! Just admit it!”
“I don’t see why I should have to justify my actions–or those of a friendly waitress–to you at all.” Phoenix’s voice was taut, his restraint hanging by a thread. “You’re being ridiculous, Maya.”
“No, you’re being ridiculous if you’re going to pretend you weren’t practically drooling all over each other like a pair of horny street mongrels!” She snapped, eyes blazing. “Why don’t you just take her out back and sniff each other’s butts while you’re at it?”
He recoiled as if she’d physically struck him.
“You’re way out of line, Maya Fey.”
“Well, hell’s bells, woman! I’m gonna have to agree with the fetchin’ fox on this one,” came an unexpectedly sugary drawl. “And if I’m guilty of a crime, I’d reckon I should get the chance to at least defend myself before I’m sentenced to swing in a good old-fashioned hangin’.”
Maya froze, her stomach plummeting. She looked up to see a very unimpressed Tiffany, arms laden with drinks, standing at their table. For the first time that night, the bubbly blonde wasn’t smiling—and from the turbulent look in her eyes, she’d clearly heard everything.
Chapter 7: It's My Party And I'll Cry If I Want To
Chapter Text
The necromancer’s mouth was completely dry as she guiltily forced herself to look into the waitress’s stormy eyes, which were currently shooting off sparks of fury in her direction.
“Goodness gracious! I surely hope I’m not causin’ any trouble here,” Tiffany cooed, her syrupy-sweet voice tinged with vitriol. “Looks to me like I’ve gone and stumbled right into a lover’s quarrel—beggin’ your pardon for that. I had no idea, stud-muffin, that you and this meaner-than-a-wet-panther little gal—who seems to enjoy comparin’ me to tentacled sea creatures and bitches in heat—were an item…”
The birthday girl cringed as the realization sank in—the Southern Belle had overheard way more than she’d thought.
“…But up until this very moment, I was under the impression you were a free agent, Nick.”
That does it! This skank’s ass is grass, and I’m the freakin’ lawn mower!
Her brief discomfiture was annihilated, replaced with a flush of pure fury. Maya literally saw red.
“Nick? Nick? Listen, Booberella, let me make something crystal clear. His name is Phoenix Wright. Nobody—but nobody—calls him Nick but me. Got that?”
“Um, I call him Nick, too…” Larry interjected feebly.
Nobody paid him the slightest attention. All eyes were on the seething spirit medium and the equally flustered Ace Attorney, whose own face was reddening now with both irritation and embarrassment.
“Maya, I have no idea what’s gotten into you tonight!” The blue attorney exclaimed. “First, you make inappropriate comments toward poor, clueless Larry—who, by the way, is so hard-up he doesn’t even know whether to take you seriously—”
“Hello? Still right here, people!” The children’s illustrator muttered from his seat.
Phoenix ignored him, too wrapped up in his own rising temper. He was in full-on courtroom mode now, finger pointed accusingly at the Kurain head.
“Then you’ve been making unprecedentedly acerbic remarks, staring daggers at me all night, and now you insult this nice waitress about her… um… endowments, for no reason whatsoever! What the hell is your problem?”
“Yeah, why do you have your knickers in a twist, missy?” Tiffany cut in, pillowy lips pursed tight, her syrupy drawl still edged with venom. “Don’t go gittin’ your gussie up—I ain’t the kinda hussy who mows another gal’s grass. But tell me somethin’, Nick.”
She raked a contemptuous gaze over Maya before turning back to Phoenix.
“I never saw a ring on your finger, so I figured you were fair game. Is Harlot O’Hara here your girlfriend, or what?”
“M-Me?! A harlot?!” Maya sputtered, her rage boiling over. “Says the girl in Daisy Dukes so short she can’t bend over in public, and with implants ready to bust out of that handkerchief she’s callin’ a shirt!”
“I ain’t got no dang implants!”
“Yeah, right, Silicone Valley! And I suppose this stifling bustier I’m wearing under this damn dress is actually making my breathing easier!”
“Objection!” The King of the Turnabout exploded. “That’s enough, Maya! Tiffany, I’m so sorry. No, Maya here is not my girlfriend. She’s just had a few too many drinks tonight…or is
possibly PMSing…”
The silence that followed was deafening. Even the blonde’s eyes widened. The rest of the table slowly shifted their gaze from Phoenix to Maya, who had risen from her chair, looking like a volcano seconds away from eruption.
“Oh, man…” Larry whimpered, sinking so low in his seat that only the spiky tips of his hair were visible.
“You porcupine-headed prick!” Maya hissed and, without further warning, promptly tossed her martini right into Phoenix’s astonished face before storming away from the table.
Tiffany wisely chose this moment to make a hasty retreat.
Phoenix sat there spluttering, icy vodka and fruit mix dripping from his hair onto his shirt. He accepted the paper napkins Gumshoe silently handed over and tried to mop himself off with the flimsy material.
“Oh, well.” He forced a smile, attempting humor to diffuse the apprehensive atmosphere. “At least it wasn’t hot coffee this time, right?”
None of his friends returned the gesture; they just continued to gaze at him in silent judgement.
“W-What?” He asked, genuinely baffled. “Why are you all looking at me like I’m the bad guy here?”
Gumshoe wordlessly busied himself wiping the wet areas on the table, leftover from Maya’s drink-flinging.
Larry, still slumped low in his chair, let out a barely audible grunt.
Edgeworth crossed his arms, tapping his famous index against his bicep, staring wordlessly at his best friend.
“Are you serious, you fool?” Franziska snapped at last. Rising from her seat and (discarding her earlier promise to Edgeworth), she cracked her whip against the defense attorney’s forearm in a sharp, punishing flick. He yelped in pain.
“Excuse me, Little Brother,” she said sweetly to her betrothed, seated beside her. “But could you please move aside? I need to use the restroom.”
The logic lover raised a well-groomed eyebrow. “Are you seriously still going to call me that even though we’re now engaged?”
A cheeky smile flickered across the German prosecutor’s normally stern features. “Forgive me, Miles. Force of habit, you see. It is most difficult to undo decades of custom within just a week.”
“Uh-huh,” he smirked, a teasing spark in his eyes. “And you just happen to suddenly need to use the facilities at this particular moment, do you?”
“What can I say?” Lady von Whippingberg gave a little shrug, feigning insouciance. “When a lady has got to go, she simply has got to go, nein?”
She squeezed past her fiancé and, once out of sight from her table, hastened her steps to the ladies’ room, where she found the birthday girl dabbing at her tear-stained face with a paper towel in front of the mirror.
“I suspected I would find you here.” Franziska crossed her arms and leaned back against the sink, positioning herself directly across from Maya.
“Congratulations, Sherlock,” Maya retorted, carefully dabbing at the eye makeup she’d painstakingly applied earlier, now slightly smudged from the torrent of tears she’d shed. “You solved the mystery of the mortified birthday girl’s whereabouts.”
She gratefully accepted the fresh paper towel that her companion discreetly handed her.
“Besides, I couldn’t very well leave,” she added bitterly. “I gave that jagged-headed jerkface my purse to hang onto, so I guess I’ll have to go back out there at some point and show my shamed face to him – to all of them…”
Two more droplets rolled down her cheeks as she spoke, and she brushed them away with angry fingers.
“I am not letting you go back out there while you are still in this soggy, pathetic state, Maya Fey,” Franziska declared firmly. “Have some dignity. You are a grown woman now, not a little girl. Cease that crying immediately!”
“It’s my party,” the Kurain head sulked, already knowing she sounded every bit the truculent child she was accused of being. “I’ll damn well cry if I want to!”
Franziska sighed heavily.
“Fine. Cry and get it all out of your system, if you must – but you will then listen to what I have to say. No insolence. No interruptions. Are we clear?”
The birthday girl nodded meekly.
“First things first,” the DA continued crisply, “I suppose I should thank you, Maya Fey, for fulfilling my secret, long-held dream of throwing a drink in that foolish lawyer’s face tonight.”
The necromancer choked back a horrified laugh. “I still can’t believe I did such a churlish thing—I feel absolutely awful!”
“There is no reason for you to feel that way.” Franziska flashed an uncharacteristically mischievous grin, and her normally icy grey eyes twinkled with momentary warmth. “That Dummkopf had it coming. That degrading, uncalled-for comment he made proved he is an even bigger fool than I originally gave him credit for. For putting that insufferable defense attorney in his place –the same one who destroyed my perfect courtroom record –I both commend and salute you!”
She finished this proclamation with her customary dramatic courtroom curtsy.
Maya managed a watery smile, despite her confusion. Where was all this sudden empathetic kindness coming from? Especially from a woman she’d always thought of as nothing more than a mean cocktail of piss and vinegar.
But Franziska’s next words stupefied her even more.
“However, Maya Fey, I would expect nothing less than the utmost foolish foolery from Phoenix Wright. You, on the other hand… I must admit, I am somewhat disappointed. Even though you have finally managed the dressing-up component of adulthood, it seems wisdom has not come with age. You are still every bit the foolish little girl I remember.”
Maya gave her a look of unveiled indignation at this character assassination, especially coming from someone the same age as her, and parted her lips to speak.
“Ah, ah, ah. I said no interrupting.” The DA wagged a gloved finger at her in the same imperious courtroom fashion that had once reduced defense attorneys to puddles.
Maya scowled but bit her tongue.
“Ergo,” Franziska continued, “I do not fault you for what you did to that foolish fool. However, I do mourn the loss of a perfectly divine Grey Goose martini – one that scruffy detective probably spent a week’s salary on.”
Maya blushed at the thinly veiled rebuke.
“Wasting good vodka on a man not even worth the bottle it was poured from!” Franziska shook her head. “That, Maya Fey, I cannot condone. Especially since I know the real foolish reason behind your actions.”
“You have no idea what you’re talking about, lady,” the diviner huffed, puffing out her cheeks.
“Oh? Is that so?” Franziska placed a hand on her hip, eyes narrowing. “Was it not due to that fool’s obnoxious comment about your monthly cycle that he wound up drenched in the remains of your untouched cocktail –one I would wager costs more than his entire ensemble tonight?”
The brunette clenched her fists, arms bent at her sides, jaw tight with rage.
“You bet your perfectly manicured Arsch it was! He insinuated to that-that blonde hoochie-mama bimbo, and an entire table full of men, that I was acting out because of my period! Like I was the one somehow in the wrong!”
Franziska raised her chin.
“Nein, Madam. That waitress was merely the final straw – the proverbial Schlampe that broke the camel’s back. Phoenix Wright ended up wearing your drink because you had reached the end of your tether. You were done with him, what with pretending not to see that you have been wearing your heart on your sleeve all night. And then his blatant announcement to some tart that the beautiful, attentive, available woman next to him was not his girlfriend? That was what finally made you snap.”
The evidence was so glaringly obvious, it might as well have come from Phoenix himself—complete with a smug, resounding “Take that!”
Maya’s shoulders sagged. Her head drooped in defeat.
“You are not even going to deny it, are you?” Franziska asked, her voice suddenly softer.
There was no answer.
“Do not bother,” she continued quietly. “Because I already know. I have known how you feel about Phoenix Wright for some time now.”
The medium’s breath caught in her throat.
“That drawing you did of him… the one you sketched on De Killer’s calling card?”
Maya’s head snapped up, eyes wide.
“I am the one who found it,” Franziska stated, her gaze unwavering. “Two whole years ago.”
Chapter 8: Phoenix Wright, Idiot Attorney
Chapter Text
Back at the men’s table, a mostly dry Phoenix was still trying to make sense of the wreckage.
“What exactly did I do to deserve that, guys? That waitress—she was flirting with me! I was hardly encouraging her!”
“Well, pal…” Gumshoe shifted uncomfortably. “You weren’t exactly discouraging her, either.”
“Even if I wasn’t, so what? Maybe I kinda liked having a pretty girl be genuinely attracted to me for once! Not just deem me some patsy to take the fall for her or some stuffy old man, but legitimately see me as an attractive, available guy.”
“And you chose tonight of all nights to showcase your desirability to the opposite sex?” Edgeworth’s voice was ice. “Right in front of Miss Fey. On her birthday.”
The clueless man’s cheeks reddened at this tongue-lashing, but his old buddy was nowhere near done.
“Moreover, Wright, you very well know—hell, everyone at this table knows, except for Miss Fey—that while it’s true you’re not technically her boyfriend, you haven’t been available, at least emotionally, for the past four years.”
Phoenix opened his mouth, but the withering look Edgeworth shot him made him slam it shut again.
“Don’t even think about objecting,” the DA warned, glowering until his childhood friend leaned back in silence. “You know that I know that you know that I know it’s the truth. Despite how you actually feel about her, you’ve never let her have the slightest clue, which is exactly why she blew up at you tonight. It had less to do with your idiotic, unnecessary comment about her monthly moods and everything to do with your dismissive actions all evening. All she wanted was for you to see her as a grown woman now, not the young girl she once was. And you didn’t give her so much as a second glance or a single compliment. That hair. That dress. That makeup… Surely you’re not dense enough to think she put in all that effort for my sake?”
“I’m married,” Gumshoe pointed out unnecessarily. “So it sure wasn’t for me.”
“I wish it’d been for my sake,” Larry groused. “Because that is one smokin’ body she’s rockin’ now! But even I’m not stupid enough to think I’m the reason she got all decked out. You’re wrong about one thing, though, Edgy. I totally saw the way Nick’s been eye-banging Maya all night! No clue how she missed it!”
“Hold it!” Phoenix groaned. “Larry, please stop! With you as my defense attorney, I’d probably end up in the electric chair!”
“Seems you’ve already fried things beyond repair with Miss Fey, Wright.” Edgeworth didn’t flinch. “You love that girl so much you’ve lied for her, cried for her, and nearly died for her—and don’t even try to deny it. I’ve watched you bend and break every ethical, moral, and legal code in existence—shielding a guilty man from prison to save her life, risking your own crossing a burning bridge to reach her. You’ve done all of this because you love her madly.”
He slammed his hand on the table.
“And yet you couldn’t even throw the poor girl a bone. She looks like a supermodel tonight, and as much as we all praised her, it meant nothing unless it came from you. Tell me—how could you gift her the dress of her dreams and still fail to give her that?”
“Because there would be no point, OK?!” Phoenix blurted, slamming both palms on the table so hard the glasses rattled, and poor Larry jumped slightly. “Yes, I love her—more than the air I breathe. I have for a long time. I realized it when she was kidnapped by De Killer. But she was—and still is—so damn young!”
He shook his head, voice dropping.
“She sees me as an old man. Like a brother. A hero. Even a saviour. But not in that way. At least by keeping her at arm’s length, I still have her friendship. If she knew, she’d just think of me as some perverted, dirty old geezer—or worse, pity me. I couldn’t bear that.”
While Gumshoe’s and Larry’s expressions were identical masks of sympathy upon hearing this declaration of ardour, Edgeworth’s was as indecipherable as one of the stone faces of Mount Rushmore. When he finally did speak, however, it was with cold fury.
“Wright,” he growled, his aristocratic features contorted into the raging zombie appearance Phoenix was all too familiar with in court. He leaned across the table and spoke through
gritted teeth. “I have defended your sorry behind, literally and figuratively, in and out of court since childhood now, and I simply cannot do it anymore. There is nothing more pitiful than the blind who refuse to see. My fiancée has been right about you all along. You truly are a pathetic, foolish fool of a man.”
“Hey, way to kick a man while he’s down, Edgy,” Larry protested weakly, but the prosecutor held up his famous pointer finger and waggled it, effectively muzzling him.
Without breaking eye contact with Phoenix, he reached into his breast pocket, withdrew a business card, and slid it across the table.
“From Franziska.”
Phoenix picked it up, frowning, then froze. His eyes widened.
It was the “fourth missing piece of evidence” from the Matt Engarde case when Maya had been kidnapped. He remembered the reunion with her and Pearl, the cousins’ quiet, cryptic exchange about how she’d endured her ordeal.
Pearls: Being shut away for two days, weren’t you scared?
Maya: Yeah, it was really scary. I felt so hopeless. So to keep my mind off of things, I drew a picture!
Now, the solution to that enigmatic mystery sat in his palm in a 3.5 by 2-inch format: a calling card for Shelley De Killer. A simple light pink shell—his logo. But drawn on it, in a girl’s hand, was Phoenix Wright’s head inside the shell. “Nick” was scrawled beside it.
Nick. The only person in the world, save for Larry, who called him that. The only girl. The only girl in the world who mattered. The one who had been terrified, starved, and subjected to God only knew what other horrors, never knowing when she’d see the light of day again. And in her darkest hour, she’d thought of him.
Phoenix squeezed his eyes shut as he felt a stinging sensation behind his lids. Edgeworth was right. He was indeed a pitiful, foolish fool. One who had been so convicted of his own
baseless fears and unsubstantiated conjectures that he had made himself willfully blind to the glaringly contradictory evidence that the entire world had been able to see. Except for him.
Right up until that moment.
He was more than just a fool. Despite being known as a genius in the courtroom, when it came to matters of the heart, he was a complete and utter imbecile.
Phoenix Wright, idiot attorney.
Chapter 9: Fools Don't Rush In
Chapter Text
Maya’s jaw fell to the floor as her saucer-sized eyes regarded the prosecutor in shocked dismay. She felt as if her throat was constricting and, for the most terrifying of moments, literally felt like she couldn’t breathe. Finally, and with great effort, she pulled herself together and drew a deep breath, struggling to contain herself.
“Y-You are the one who found that card?” She whispered shakily. “B-But how?”
“It was in Scruffy’s old trench coat.” Franziska shrugged. “And it was hardly the first time the incompetent fool had overlooked a glaring piece of evidence.”
The spirit medium felt tears threatening to fall again as she looked beseechingly at the other woman.
“Oh, please, please don’t tell me you’ve gone and told Nick? Or nearly worse, given it to Gumshoe? Surely not even you could be that incredibly cruel?”
“Foolish girl! What do you take me for? Of course, I did not give that foolish detective the card!”
“Oh, thank heavens!” Maya sagged back against the wall behind her; such was the weight of her relief at those words.
“I gave it to Miles for safekeeping instead.”
“Sweet mother of Mystic Ami, just smite me where I stand and end my suffering!” The lady in red groaned, slapping a hand to her face. “What, in all the Twilight and Earthly Realms, made you think that was the better option?”
“I figured, since my fiancé is better acquainted with the object of affection than I am—and older and wiser, or so he keeps telling me—he might be the better one to handle both the timing and the delivery of it.”
“This is it. This is how I die – from secondhand embarrassment! I simply cannot believe this is my life right now!” Maya fumed, throwing her hands in the air. “Why did either of you have to stick your noses in at all? Seriously – who the happy hell do you think you are, playing God with our lives? Couldn’t you nosy Buttinskis just leave well enough alone?”
“Maya Fey, just when I think you have reached the highest possible pinnacle of foolishness, you go and prove me wrong!” Franziska’s twin flints raked her with scorn. “Surely you are not so fool-headed as to not believe that tonight’s events could have been prevented, had Phoenix Wright actually known of this torch you have been carrying for him all this time?”
The Kurain head didn’t answer. Her downcast gaze said enough.
The Wild Mare folded her arms, closed her eyes, and released a long, weary sigh. Clearly, this was going to be more difficult than she’d anticipated. She pivoted tactics entirely.
“You know,” she remarked, voice suddenly casual, “I have not yet wished you a happy birthday.”
The diviner blinked, startled.
“Nothing personal,” Franziska added briskly. “I simply never understood the concept. The act of celebrating one’s own slow march toward the grave always struck me as ridiculous. Papa believed that as well – it was why he never threw birthday parties. Not for Mama. Not for me. Not for Miles. Not for my sister.”
She smiled grimly.
“However… being with Miles has, shall we say, mellowed me somewhat.”
Thawed out a tad, is more like it, Maya thought sourly, uncertain of where this conversation was going, but too emotionally drained to interrupt.
“Miles, albeit for reasons I cannot entirely fathom, holds Phoenix Wright in remarkably high esteem –both professionally and personally,” Franziska continued coolly, wholly unconcerned with the village leader’s brooding silence. “He is also quite fond of you, Maya Fey – an affection I will concede is somewhat less baffling. As I have chosen to love this man –if not always understand him –for the rest of my mortal days, I have resolved to adopt that most curious of American idioms: If you can’t beat them, join them. Yes. That is the philosophy I must embrace.”
The psychic finally found her voice.
“Does this mean you’re finally going to stop whipping us all to a bloody pulp whenever the mood strikes?”
Franziska hesitated, then gave a small, reluctant nod.
“It is a work in progress. I promised Miles I would try. After all, I refrained from whipping that fool, Larry Butz, when he had me in a death grip earlier, did I not?”
There was no need to mention the momentary lapse with Phoenix before arriving. As in court, she saw no reason to present evidence that weakened her case.
“And for the record,” she added primly, as though bestowing high honor, “I have never whipped you.”
Only with your words, Maya thought wryly. “Thank you so much for your restraint, Ms. von Karma.”
“Sarcasm duly noted.”
The necromancer shook her head in wonder.
“You’re honestly turning over a new leaf for Mr. Edgeworth? Zvarri! You must really love him.”
The betrothed party blushed slightly but nodded again.
“Love makes even the most perfect of us into perfect fools, Maya Fey. I must concede, my fiancé is the sole reason I am trying to become somebody worthy of his love. Someone…less
of a –”
She faltered slightly, searching for the words.
“A toxic, cold-hearted bitch?” Maya supplied helpfully, then flushed at the sharp look she got for the tongue slip. She clapped a mortified hand over her mouth. “This is why I don’t drink! I’m so sorry, Ms. Von Karma. I didn’t mean it.”
“Yes, you did,” Franziska replied with a faint smirk. “But as I am feeling magnanimous, I shall pretend I did not hear that. Besides, I have a birthday gift for you, in atonement for not offering you well wishes earlier.”
Maya was taken aback more by this gesture of kindness than anything else that had been dished out to her all evening. She shook her head frantically.
“That’s … totally unnecessary! You and Mr. Edgeworth already got us all a round of drinks. And didn’t you say earlier you disapproved of frivolous spending?”
“Foolish girl!” Franziska scoffed. “I never said it would cost me anything of monetary value.”
Her mouth curved into a rare, roguish grin.
“Nevertheless, I assure you, it is priceless.”
“Will you please stop speaking in riddles?” The diviner groaned. “My poor, alcohol-addled brain and broken heart can only take so much!”
“Fine. Let us start with the hurtful acts that clueless, foolish Phoenix Wright committed tonight, however unintentional they probably were.”
Franziska began counting off on her fingers.
“Number one, he did not appear to notice or compliment your obvious efforts with your appearance or attire tonight, which I will confess, while a bit too outré for my own taste, is quite stunning indeed.”
Maya swallowed hard, her throat tight.
“Number two, he appeared to be besotted with that Booberella bimbo of a waitress all night and allowed her to monopolize all of his attention, even though the fool had you, lovely and longing, by his side the entire time.”
The tears began to fall again.
“And finally, number three, he decided to take the side of said bar wench, whilst outright declaring that the two of you, without any hesitation or ambiguity, were not together in any way, shape, or form. Does that neatly summarize his list of follies, or am I missing anything?”
The blatant rehashing of the series of gut-wrenching events that had occurred and resulted in her secluded solace in the ladies’ room was still too much for Maya, who choked back a sob as she looked tearfully at the other woman.
“Four years, Ms. Von Karma. I’ve loved that man for four long, heartbreaking, unrequited years! Yes, I know I was just a teenager when I first met him, and he saw me as Mia’s little sister, and then just as his faithful assistant. But I’m all grown up now and no longer work for him! So many trials and tribulations have befallen us over the years; I’d just assumed, hoped, and prayed that they were for some reason. That all the suffering and agonizing loss would result in at least one great thing – that Nick would be forced to finally realize that he loved me and couldn’t bear to be without me.”
Maya’s tears were falling again, faster than she could wipe them away.
“I was kidnapped and tortured by a madman, and the whole time, all I could think about was Nick—my knight in shining armor—just to get me through it. I kept holding on to this foolish hope that if I somehow survived, maybe he’d finally realize how much I meant to him.”
She let out a shaky breath, eyes distant.
“But even after all that… even after Pearly booked the honeymoon suite for us…” A bitter laugh. “Still, nothing changed. Nothing.”
Her voice turned quieter, sadder.
“All that happened that night was we got drunk off the minibar and passed out watching Steel Samurai reruns on the jumbo TV. That was it.”
The silver-haired beauty snorted before quickly composing herself, then bit her lip and looked instantly contrite when the Kurain head frowned at her.
“Go on,” she encouraged softly.
“Then the next tragedy occurred just earlier this year. The one where my mother was killed because his sociopathic, demon ex-girlfriend Dahlia tried to kill me, and Nick thought I was dead. Once again, I nearly died, and things remained as they’d always been with us; he didn’t magically come to his senses even then and suddenly realize that he loved me. Nor when I had to leave, to go back to Kurain, did he come running after me. This birthday, this outing, was my final hurrah. My last, pathetic attempt to try to have him see me in a different light, since losing me, or almost losing me, hadn’t had any effect.”
Maya laughed bitterly and gestured at herself.
“And you know how well that turned out. I would have given anything in the world to have him just say, without being forced or prompted, that he thought I looked pretty, or at least grown-up. He certainly had no problem ogling that waitress tonight! What does she have that I don’t have, aside from the obvious store-bought set? I would have killed to have had him look at me, just once, the way he looked at Tiffany tonight.”
“Nervously and with reluctant lust?” Franziska derided, arching a brow. “That is the sort of attention you covet?”
“Are you kidding me? He was keenly aware that she was a woman – one that he found sexy and attractive!”
“Objection! Because she didn’t give him a choice! Women like that have no qualms about being seen as baseless sex objects and shamelessly flaunting their assets; that is all they have to offer, and they flaunt it because it works. But what you failed to see, Maya Fey, was that Tiffany was the one making the moves on Phoenix, and not vice versa. She threw herself, and those can’t miss mammaries, into his face all night, and yes, because he is only a man, yes, he did look.”
“Boy, did he ever!” The village leader noted bitterly.
“But then again, so did my Miles,” Franziska inserted sardonically. “Hell, so did you and I! And I can hardly claw my fiancé’s eyes out for it, tempting though it might have been! Is that how you want Phoenix Wright to see you, Maya Fey? As a piece of meat that he can devour for the night and then promptly discard? Do you want his heart–or his hormones?”
“Of course I don’t want to be a one-time penis mitten!” Maya denied hotly. “I want his mind, his soul, his heart…not his…parts. But none of this still explains why he couldn’t even compliment me! He did so with such ease with you!”
Franziska waved her hand dismissively.
“Please. I am the future wife of his childhood friend. His prerequisite niceties posed no risk, nor reward for him. It was pure social convention, like when Miles complimented you. Men are always more generous with flattery toward women who are not theirs. Do you think my fiancé noticed that I had bought a new dress? Nein, he did not! But do I doubt his feelings or attraction to me over it? Not at all.”
Maya shook her head stubbornly.
“It’s still not the same. You already know your other half loves you and obviously desires you. Four years, Ms. Von Karma! Nick’s had all this time to make a move…and the closest he’s ever come to commenting on my appearance was when I had to wear that tacky, skimpy waitress outfit at Très Bien, which was only a trifle less revealing than the uniforms they wear here. All he had to say was ‘maybe you should quit being a spirit medium‘!”
“Foolish man!” Franziska snickered. “You keep harping on how, in four years, Phoenix Wright has not had the nerve to declare his affections. But all men are fools, Maya Fey. Yes, even mine – the genius prosecutor – although admittedly less so than most. And fools do not always rush in! I have known Miles Edgeworth almost my entire life, and yet the blasted man still had not proposed to me – do you know that ultimately, it was I who had to propose to him?”
“Spirit mediums take me now! Are you kidding me?!”
“I never kid,” the Wild Mare said smugly.
“Don’t tell me you had to buy your own engagement ring, too?!”
“Of course not!” The silver-haired woman smirked. “I did, however, present him with the pickup slip for the ring I had been eyeing at the jewelers and went with him to ensure he at least got that right.”
The martini-flinger laughed; her sorrows momentarily forgotten. “I’m sure Mr. Edgeworth just loves it when you tell this story!”
“Immensely,” she replied dryly. “But the point remains: Miles loves me. Even though it took him longer than a snail on a treadmill to finally tell me, and even longer to prove that he wanted to be with me, forever and always. The point is, it just took time. As does everything with foolish men.”
The German looked her new friend directly in the eye, and her tone grew more gentle.
“Furthermore, Phoenix Wright loves you, Maya Fey. And in case you do not believe me, I have irrefutable, conclusive evidence. This was the birthday gift that I have wanted to give you all along.”
Chapter 10: The Twilight Zone
Chapter Text
“Hey, are you alright, Pal?” Gumshoe prodded, putting a concerned hand on the blue attorney’s shoulder. Several minutes had passed since he’d been given the proverbial card from Edgeworth, and he hadn’t spoken a word ever since. He just sat there, elbows up on the table, with his head down and buried in his hands.
“I know it appeared that desperate times called for desperate measures, but I think you might have overly shocked him with that last piece of evidence, Edgy,” Larry noted, eyeing his old friend worriedly. “I’m sure it was never your intention to break him, though!”
Phoenix, at last, glanced up.
“Shut up, Larry! I am not broken!”
“Oh, look! It speaks!” Although the DA was attempting flippancy, he looked visibly relieved that his best friend was at least now talking, despite the bleak expression on his face. “It’s a bloody miracle!”
“You shut up, too, Edgeworth,” the defense lawyer grumbled. “Unless you can help me think of a solution to this ginormous mess, which is my love life!”
“Which you didn’t even know you had until ten minutes ago,” Larry offered helpfully.
“Normally, I’d tell Butz to put a sock in it,” the DA sighed. “But for once, he’s right, Wright. I realize that while all of this has been blatantly obvious to the rest of us for some time, it all seems sudden to you. Do you know yet how you wish to proceed? What are your intentions with Miss Fey?”
“Good grief, Edgeworth, you sound like a Mafia father-in-law!” The Turnabout King exclaimed. “Is this the point where I’m supposed to tell you, Don Corleone, that I plan on making her an offer she can’t refuse?”
Gumshoe looked startled. “You’re gonna ask her to marry you, Pal? Shouldn’t you wait to see if she’s willing to go out with you first?”
“Of course not! I was being facetious!” Phoenix shook his head at the detective in exasperation. “How am I supposed to decide what I’m going to do when, forget dating or marrying me, I’m not even sure Maya will ever even speak to me again?”
Nobody was able to think of an encouraging reply to the question, not even Edgeworth, who normally had an answer for everything.
“I’ve really blown it, haven’t I?” The spiky-haired man realized sadly. “I finally realize that my feelings have been reciprocated all this time, only to have it be too late. She hates me now. I’ve lost Maya – for good.”
For the second time that night, Franziska was subjected to a wide-eyed jaw drop by Maya, who was once again rendered speechless at the proclamation she’d just heard.
“Phoenix Wright loves me?” She echoed, astonished. “Whatever made you come to that conclusion? How can you make such a profound statement to me, out of the blue like that? And you claim you have incontrovertible evidence? Surely, he’s not confessed to you, of all people?”
“He has not needed to,” Franziska informed her loftily. “There is a reason why they say actions speak louder than words, Maya Fey. As much as you have been ready to crucify that fool for never voicing anything even remotely affectionate to you tonight, or ever, the rest of us have been privy to seeing several examples of a man so desperately in love with you he has been nearly driven to madness!”
“You’re the mad one,” the birthday girl whispered, although without much conviction. Oh, what she would give to be wrong about this!
“Let me start with the first time you returned to your village,” Franziska began evenly. “You were gone for nearly half a year. Did you know that Phoenix Wright—who barely ever has two nickels to rub together—fell into such a state of melancholy that he did not bother to take a single case for months? By then, he had already made a name for himself in the legal world, but he refused every offer, ignoring his worsening financial state, for two months straight. Not until the day Ema Skye came to him, begging him to defend her sister, did he step foot in a courtroom again… to face my fiancé.”
“Ema Skye?” Maya echoed, brow furrowing. “Who the heck is that? And how does another woman convincing Nick to take her case prove he loves me?”
“Because Phoenix Wright was so despondent in your absence that he could not even bring himself to function as a lawyer,” Franziska replied bluntly. “And according to Miles, that young forensic student looked and acted strikingly like you.”
“That’s quite the claim.” Maya folded her arms and raised a skeptical brow. “Mia and I were sisters, and she didn’t look much like me! You’re telling me some random girl resembling me was what magically motivated Nick to get back to work?”
“Scoff if you must,” Franziska replied coolly. “But I still have not even gotten to the real evidence yet. Let us now revisit the Engarde case. Shelly De Killer held you hostage—demanding Phoenix get a ‘not guilty’ verdict for his client if he wanted you back alive.”
“I remember that.” Maya nodded, then frowned. “And I also remember writing a very clear note telling Nick not to do anything that would let that scumbag go free. Engarde’s in prison, which means Nick respected my wishes, right?”
Franziska said nothing. Her eyes shifted downward, and she fiddled with the sleeves of her dress.
Maya’s heart dropped. Her voice rose.
“He did… didn’t he?”
Still no response.
“Please… answer me!”
The prosecutor’s voice was low.
“Phoenix Wright is a man of the law. Before that case, he had never come close to crossing any ethical lines. But for you, he was willing to do anything to get you back safely. Maya… he moved heaven and earth trying to secure Engarde’s acquittal. He even considered making someone else take the fall…”
The aghast spirit medium blanched.
“What in the name of ZZ Top’s beards are you saying?!” she shrieked. “No. No, he couldn’t have! He wouldn’t! I told him I’d never forgive him if he did that! Someone as principled as Nick… he wouldn’t bend the law for me – especially against my wishes!”
Her voice cracked. Her hands trembled. But the silence that followed said it all.
“Do not be angry with him for that,” Franziska said softly. “That man loved you so much, he would have fought the Devil himself to ensure your safety. Thankfully, it never came to that. But he did throw his morals and ethics out the window. He deliberately dragged out that trial, trying everything he could to win a not guilty verdict. Ultimately, it was I who arrived with the decisive evidence that proved Engarde’s guilt. Only then did Phoenix step aside and allow Miles to steamroll ahead with the prosecution—no objections, no resistance—and get that bastard locked up for good.”
The raven-haired brunette found herself holding her breath as she waited for the rest of the tale.
“So no, Maya Fey. He never betrayed your trust. He did not let Engarde walk. And to this day, that is the only case Phoenix Wright has ever lost.” Franziska smirked. “And believe me –he was happier than a clam about it.”
Maya’s mind was reeling as she absorbed all of this.
“He never told me,” she whispered dazedly.
“There is one final piece of evidence I would like to present on behalf of that fool in love,” Franziska declared. “You were mostly out of the loop, but you remember what happened at Hazakura Temple, yes? You knew that lightning struck the high suspension bridge and set it ablaze?”
Maya nodded slowly.
“What you did not know is that the damn, foolish man, blind to everything but your possible safety, disregarded himself entirely and rushed across said fiery bridge because he knew you were trapped on the other side. Even though he knew his chances of survival were slim to none!”
Maya gaped at her in disbelief.
“Please tell me you’re shitting me?! Nick ran across a burning bridge? That bridge was already scary when it wasn’t on fire – he barely made it across with me the first time! The man is deathly afraid of heights!”
“That man,” the Wild Mare stated firmly, “loves you so much, he literally risked his life. And he nearly died for his foolish heroics. The bridge collapsed, and he plunged straight into that hazardous river. He was hospitalized, nearly caught pneumonia…”
“Oh my God! Nick!” The Burger Queen moaned, burying her head in her hands.
Suddenly, her head jerked up.
“Wait a minute! This is even harder to buy than the other two bogus tales you just told me. That bridge is at least what, 80 feet high! And that raging river has all those treacherous rocks below. Surely the impact alone would have killed him?”
“What can I say, Maya Fey? The truth is stranger than fiction, is it not? The man has more lives than a cat, it would appear. Besides, Phoenixes are known to always rise from the ashes, aren’t they?”
“I still can't believe he did that for me,” the diviner murmured, almost to herself. Then she had a terrible thought. “In fact, neither should you! You seem to have forgotten that Iris was also thought to be trapped on the other side! How do you know Nick wasn’t risking life and limb to save her, his precious ex-girlfriend instead?”
Franziska gave her a look like she had sprouted a second head.
“Are you truly this foolish, daft, or just willingly blind?”
“None of the above! I’m just…” the spirit medium faltered, voice cracking. “…not sure I believe any of this. Especially not from you! This newfound goodwill you’re suddenly showing me—it’s just… Twilight Zone levels of eldritch! You’re suddenly Team Maya now? In the name of love for Mr. Edgeworth?”
She eyed the prosecutor with overt skepticism.
“But let’s pretend I do believe you. Even then, the events you’re describing – Nick jumping into rivers? Losing cases on purpose? Seeing double?! They’re all too bizarre to even fathom! And this coming from me, a gal who literally sees and channels dead people!”
Franziska threw her hands up.
“Why in the world would I make this up, you foolish girl?! You know that I barely abide Phoenix Wright on a good day, and only do so for Miles’ sake! I most definitely am not desirous to do that blasted fool any favors! And while I hold no ill will for you, I am surely not foolish enough to render us sudden best friends because of this bathroom rendezvous! I am telling you all of this because as a prosecutor, my first and foremost duty is to deliver the truth!”
Maya blinked at the impassioned outburst, surprised—and, for the first time, a little moved.
“Yes, actions speak louder than words—but they’re also easily misinterpreted,” she added gently. “It’s not that I think you’re lying, per se. I just think you might be reading too much into things. Your interpretation of these events doesn’t necessarily make them the gospel truth. Especially the idea that Nick took a case because some girl reminded him of me. That? I flat-out don’t buy. The concept is just too… absurd.”
At that moment, the door to the ladies’ room opened. A pretty young woman, about their age, walked in and flashed a friendly smile upon seeing Franziska. Having just ducked into a stall to procure some more toilet paper, Maya missed the entrance but listened to the exchange outside as she dabbed at the smudged areas of her eye makeup.
“Miss Von Karma!” A strange yet somehow familiar voice chirped, as bubbly as a bottle of soda water. “Oh my gosh, hi! How are you?”
“Well, this is quite the surprise,” Franziska replied pleasantly. “I am doing quite well, thank you. What brings you here? I thought you were doing your forensic science studies in Europe when I last saw you.”
“Spring break!” The voice chirped. “We’re here for my sister’s bachelorette party!”
Maya exited the stall. She stepped in front of the mirror, so engrossed in the task of trying to preserve what little makeup she hadn’t sobbed off that she still hadn’t looked up to see who Franziska was so amicably chatting with.
“How nice. Lana got engaged?”
Maya’s hand froze mid-blot.
Lana? As in… Lana Skye? That would mean that… this was her sister?
Then she saw her. The girl stepped beside her at the sink, and the psychic finally looked up—only to have her jaw hit her chest at the first sight of her aforementioned look-alike reflected in the glass.
At first, Maya was certain she was so drunk she was surely seeing double…how else to explain the near mirror image of herself reflected back at her, standing next to her before the mirror?
This was Ema Skye?!
The psychic shook her head and blinked a few times as she took in the other girl's appearance.
Same height and stature, although largely obscured by a white lab coat. Huge, bright, inquisitive eyes, eerily similar in size and shape to her own dark ones, except teal in color. Porcelain skin on a small, heart-shaped visage with diminutive doll-like features, much like her own.
What was most gasp-worthy, however, was that hair.
Although the brunette’s mane was a slightly lighter shade than hers, the other girl had it pulled back partially at the crown, round pink sunglasses resting atop it, with wisps and side bangs framing her face…in the eerily identical hairstyle Maya herself always wore.
All that was missing on their new arrival were the round Fey beads at the ends!
What the actual hell?!
In the mirror, she caught the German woman’s knowing smirk. The prosecutor said nothing. She didn’t have to. The words were written all over her smug expression: “I told you so.”
And just like that, the village leader was spiraling, and it had nothing to do with excessive alcohol consumption.
Phoenix Wright: death-defying romantic.
Franziska Von Karma: emotionally supportive.
Ema Skye: doppelgänger.
Her knees wobbled slightly.
Mystic Ami, help me! I think I have officially entered the Twilight Zone…
Chapter 11: G-Strings and Glimmerous Fops
Chapter Text
The science enthusiast caught the lady in red’s astonished expression in the mirror and turned to face her look-alike with a friendly smile.
“You must be Maya Fey,” she said warmly, extending her hand. “I’m Ema Skye. It’s so great to finally meet the girl I’ve heard so much about—in the flesh!”
The stupefied spirit medium shook the other girl’s hand, all the while desperately trying to shake the notion that she was in some sort of Sci-Fi, alternative universe, and tried to regain her composure.
“Whatever you’ve heard, it’s lies, all lies!” She joked, returning the smile.
“Oh, I doubt Mr. Wright would flat out be deceitful – a rarity in his profession, I know,” Ema grinned. “But he did fail to mention just how lovely you were. The photo I saw in his wallet doesn’t do any justice to you at all!”
“So, the foolish fool has a picture of her in his wallet, does he?” The German woman asked silkily, raising a knowing brow, much to the birthday girl’s annoyance. “How very interesting …”
Oh, for crying out loud! The spirit medium thought crossly. If Franziska Von Karma insists on maintaining that knowing smirk any longer, or harder, her face is going to become completely frozen that way!
“Thank you for the kind words, Ema.” Maya focused her attention back on the pretty brunette, touched by the vibes of genuine sincerity that radiated off her. “So, you’re celebrating your sister’s stagette, are you? Sounds like fun!”
“We’re having a blast, although it’d be really great if Ja Fool pianist took requests. Or at least stopped butchering every song he sings with that frog-in-a-mailbox voice of his! Poor Sinatra is spinning in his grave in protest!”
The two girls giggled, then Maya noticed the pinkish stain on Ema’s white lab coat.
“Oh dear, what happened?”
“Ugh!” Ema rolled her beautiful eyes heavenward. “It’s so packed out there that I decided to speed things up and order my own drink at the bar, in hopes of more quickly achieving enough of a drunken stupor to drown out the tone-deaf tenor. Just as I was turning around and leaving the bar area, a G-String in each hand…”
Franziska finally spoke, her tone rich with amusement.
“You are referring to yet another ridiculously named American cocktail, yes?”
“Of course! I haven’t yet had a chance to get so smashed that I began discarding my actual underwear! Which, scientifically speaking, is the number one way to achieve chafing in the posterior region if worn too long! Anyway, as I turned, this idiotic, clumsy … glimmerous fop of a guy crashed into me, leaving me covered in G-Strings and still devoid of my much yearned-for buzz!”
“The fool!” Franziska huffed. “He would have felt the wrath of my whip for that!”
“He should have at least offered to buy you another round of drinks to replace them,” Maya agreed.
“Oh, the pretty boy offered, of course,” Ema answered grumpily. “He even had the nerve to try to sweet-talk me after that and said he could perhaps atone by playing a ‘private concert’ for me sometime. He’s some wannabe rocker in a boy band. I told him exactly where he could shove his electric guitar and high-tailed it here to attempt to do some laundry on my lab coat.”
“A boy band, you say?” Maya asked, never one to pass up the chance to be a star-struck fangirl. “Anyone we may have heard of at all?”
“Argh, I dunno, his thick accent made it almost impossible to understand him, especially in that noisy crowd! The Garblers, I think? Something stupid like that.”
The psychic watched as the forensic student scrubbed frantically at the offending spot.
“Try blotting first,” she suggested. “With a dry paper towel, before you start the soap treatment.”
Ema complied and smiled with relief when it appeared the helpful advice was working.
“Thanks so much, Maya! I don’t know why I didn’t think of that myself. It’s mostly gone now.”
“Ask the bartender for some club soda when you go back out there,” Franziska advised. “That should do the trick for that last tiny remaining bit.”
“You guys are so great!” Ema beamed. “Is there anything I can do for you at all?”
The diviner smiled sheepishly. “I don’t suppose you happen to have any eye makeup stashed in those pockets, do you?”
“Hey, Pal, I see the girls coming back now,” Gumshoe told the lawyer in an unnecessarily hushed tone, as nobody else could have heard him over the roaring din of the bar. “Now’s your chance to talk to Maya!”
“Really?” Phoenix craned his neck to see over the crowd, and, in the distance, he could make out a perfectly serene-looking Maya leading the way back to the table with Franziska. He turned to his friends with a frantic expression. “Nrrgh! What do I say to her?”
“What?! You mean you haven’t been utilizing all this time rehearsing your ‘I’m sorry, I completely suck n’ stuff ‘speech, Nick?”
“Candid as always, Butz,” Edgeworth was as poker-faced as usual. “Although, surprisingly, not entirely off the mark this time. While I propose a more eloquent use of verbiage when you speak to Miss Fey, Wright, I can’t completely disagree that outright groveling may indeed be the route to take.”
“Thanks a lot, guys! I haven’t come up with any sort of apology script because you all know I’m not any good at delivering rehearsed material. I’ve always been a fly by the seat of my pants kind of guy, you know? Moment to moment…”
“That is most grand, Wright. And how has that impromptu path been working for you lately?”
Phoenix was just opening his mouth for a scathing retort of exactly where Edgeworth could stick his unhelpful, sarcastic barbs when, suddenly, Franziska and Maya were upon them, and he closed it hurriedly.
Anxiously, he searched his former assistant’s pretty face, which was composed and still flawlessly made up, devoid of any evidence of the indignant rage that it had borne half an hour ago. It was also impossible to read further, seeing as how she was presently gesturing to Larry and therefore not looking at him now.
“Could you please pass my purse, Larry? Thanks. You know, guys, it’s not quite midnight, and still plenty early enough for me to grab a cab back to the office, fetch Pearly, and catch one of the last trains back to Kurain. I don’t want to ruin your night, though, by ducking out so prematurely, so you all stay and enjoy yourselves now, and I’ll be…”
“Hold it!” Phoenix cried, anxiously reaching out and grabbing her arm as she turned to leave the table. “Maya, please don’t go. We need to talk.”
“And we will, Nick,” she replied dully, still not quite looking him in the eye. “It’s just that I think it’s best if we just go our separate ways right now and perhaps have a discussion when we’ve both cooled down a bit.”
She forced a smile.
“Don’t worry, it’s not like I’m going anywhere. You know where I live, right?”
She awkwardly patted his arm and started towards the exit.
Phoenix stared after her, completely disheartened. Maya was going to actually leave, while things were still such a complete and total mess between them. Circumstances were now very different from the many insignificant spats they’d had over the years. This time, he couldn’t just sweep things under a rug and figure he’d make things up to her later, or just apologize in the morning, like he had when she’d worked for him and knew he would see her the next day.
He cursed himself for how many countless times he’d taken for granted that he was going to see her again because she’d also lived with him, and his home was hers as well. Regardless of how many mini-fits Maya had thrown or how many doors she’d dramatically slammed behind her when she’d stormed off in the past, he had never been too worried that they wouldn’t make up again, because he knew eventually, she’d have to come back.
But that was then. This was now.
This time around, it would take more than the appealing promises of wallet-straining, bountiful burgers or brain-numbing Steel Samurai or Pink Princess movie tickets to atone for whatever wrongs he’d done, or whatever she’d thought he’d done. This time, he had screwed things up so badly beyond probable repair that it would take a bloody miracle. Because Maya Fey wasn’t his assistant or roommate any longer. She didn’t have to come back the next day.
She didn’t have to come back at all.
That dawning realization made Phoenix feel a panic building inside him, unlike any he’d ever experienced; even worse than when he’d crossed that burning bridge. Because the fear of losing his life hadn’t even come close to the terrifying concept of losing the love of his life.
Without Maya Fey, life had no meaning.
He had to do something drastic, now. And do it fast.
“Somebody, stop her!” He shouted at his friends as he shot out of his seat and made his frenzied way up to the piano while Franziska jumped up and hurried after Maya as quickly as her high-heeled boots would allow her.
Phoenix reached the piano breathlessly, Edgeworth in tow, just as the musician completed his wince-worthy rendition of Mel Torme’s Jeepers, Creepers.
“I’m so sorry, buddy,” he rasped, grabbing the pianist by the arm, hoisting him up, and shoving him off to the side. “But this is an emergency!”
He plopped himself down on the bench, vaguely aware of Edgeworth leading away the outraged, affronted young man and speaking soothingly to him in the corner.
Phoenix spoke quickly into the attached microphone.
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. I hope you’re all enjoying yourselves and don’t mind a little change in tonight’s musical repertoire.”
To his surprise, an unexpected loud cheer roused from the crowd at his announcement, suggesting that the change of pianists from the tuxedo-clad blond guy to himself was most definitely not an unwelcome one.
With pink cheeks, he continued.
“I’d like to dedicate this song here as a token of my affection to the dear birthday girl, standing there at the back of the bar.”
With relief, he noted Franziska had indeed reached Maya in time and was now pulling her back towards their table.
“She’s the ravishing lady in red at the corner table there, and the most beautiful girl in this bar tonight. Maya baby, this is for you.”
He took a deep breath and raised his trembling fingers to the piano keys.
Here goes nothing…
Chapter 12: I Would Break Every Law for You
Chapter Text
The burger lover had just reached the exit doors of the bar when she felt someone clamp their hand down on her arm, stopping her from moving further.
Naturally, she assumed it was Phoenix, whom she simply wasn’t ready to face just yet until she was able to better digest some of the events of the night in solitude, so she braced herself.
Taking a deep breath, she carefully assumed a neutral facial expression before turning around. But to her disappointment, rather than encountering a pair of beautiful sapphire blue eyes, she found herself looking into very determined slate-grey ones instead.
“Come with me, Maya Fey,” Franziska said firmly, grabbing her hand in a surprisingly vice-like hold and tugging her back towards their table.
“Why? I’ve already said my goodbyes to everyone and told Nick I’d talk to him later!” Maya complained, struggling, to no avail, against the iron grip.
The Wild Mare shot a disgusted look over her shoulder.
“Well, Phoenix obviously is not content to postpone unresolved issues, and he implored us not to let you leave. He also just proved that in this particular instance, he is a lesser fool than you, Maya Fey!”
“Hey!” The birthday girl protested, stung by the words of the woman she’d thought to have befriended earlier that evening. “I’m the one who was completely humiliated tonight, remember? So why are you talking like it’s me who’s the jackass here?”
Franziska stopped towing then and spun around, her face a mask of disapproval.
“Because, regardless of the mistakes he made tonight, Phoenix is clearly eager to try to right his wrongs. You told me you have dealt with kidnappers, ghosts, demons … yet you would be so cowardly to run away from the man you love just because you fought? That is not the way adults handle things, Maya Fey. A real woman would put on her brave face, deal with the conflict, and be eager to resolve things!”
Her voice softened as she saw the tears filling the spirit medium’s eyes.
“All because making up can be so very sweet.”
“I know you told me he loves me, Ms. Von Karma, and I want to believe that, I honestly do! But I can’t – it just isn’t real unless I hear it from Nick. I couldn’t possibly put my heart on the line any more than I already have and have him reject me. I couldn’t bear that.”
The Kurain head sniffled as a stray tear trembled on the edge of her lashes.
“Oh, dammit, now I’m going to turn to puddles again, and ruin the new touch-up job Ema did on me.”
She dabbed at her eyes as Franziska, in an uncharacteristic display of gentleness, soothingly rubbed her shoulder.
“OK, fine. You win. I’ll come back with you.”
The DA lightly put her hand on her friend’s back, gently guiding, rather than pulling her, back to their table, just as they saw Phoenix sitting at the piano and speaking into the microphone.
Maya’s eyes widened as she listened to the same man who just earlier that night had declared he shunned any sort of dramatic gestures publicly announce that he was about to perform for her, the birthday girl.
“The most beautiful girl in the bar.”
She plopped down into her seat in a stunned daze, replaying the words she’d so longed to hear over and over again in her mind.
Phoenix raised his famous courtroom pointer finger up and directed it right at her.
“Maya baby, this one’s for you.”
The first few bars of a strangely familiar song began, as did the murmurs at their table.
“I think he’s playing Grenade by Bruno Mars!” Larry crowed excitedly. “I love this song – it’s the story of my life! ”
“I guess his playing isn’t too bad if it’s recognizable,” Gumshoe agreed. “Although I’m not sure why he chose a song about a poor guy who would kill himself over some awful girl.”
“I hope Wright’s singing is better than his playing,” Edgeworth noted laconically, wincing as they heard a sharp off-key note in the immediate opening part of the song.
“Phoenix is most definitely not a better piano player than the slick-blond boy,” Franziska observed with her typical bluntness.
But then the spiky-haired lawyer began to sing. The sound of his surprisingly warm, soothing, on-key voice crooning to the melody of the famous song squelched any and all further criticisms.
Burgers Nick? Don’t say no!
Say you’ll please just give
Oh you eat and I pay
For as long as we shall live
Should have known you were trouble
From the first glance
At those puppy dog eyes
Just can’t say no to…
The tune the spiky-haired man was singing followed the melody of the pop star’s original, but the lyrics? Entirely his own.
Unfortunately, while his improvisation had initially touched Maya—who’d been flattered by the praise of her beauty in front of the whole Borscht Bowl crowd—that moment had passed very quickly. Horror replaced warmth as she realized the lyrics weren’t remotely romantic … they were downright humiliating. Wasn’t the man done embarrassing her tonight?! Was this some sick, twisted joke?
Well, joke’s on him if he thinks I’m just going to sit here and be the butt of it! She fumed. On behalf of the Fey bloodline, I’d like to formally disown him, here and now!
“I’m leaving!” Maya burst out, snatching her purse off the table. “I don’t have to sit here and listen to him butcher one of my favorite artists while turning me into a punchline! Oh sure, Franziska, he loves me, huh? Nothing says romance like a song about my hamburger addiction and puppy-dog eyes! Truly the stuff of Shakespearean sonnets!”
She rose from her seat, her eyes burning with barely suppressed tears of angry mortification. She’d gotten no further than a step from the table when she suddenly felt it.
Crack!
The necromancer let out a yelp, more in surprise than pain, as she looked first at the red mark in her bare shoulder, then to the lethal look on the German prosecutor’s face as she brandished her whip, steely gaze fixed on her.
“Sit yourself down this instant, Maya Fey!” Franziska commanded, dropping her weapon down to her side but still clutching it menacingly in her hand.
The Kurain head’s eyes were round with shock as she wisely sank back into her seat.
“I can’t believe you just whipped me! Are you insane?”
“I have tried being compassionate and understanding with you all night, but it’s been nothing but an exercise in futility and a waste of my valuable breath!” Franziska informed her, with no hint of apology. “I have run out of ways to get through to you, Maya Fey. I had no choice but to resort to extreme measures – your consistent foolery left me no other option. If that mediocre pianist but surprisingly decent singer up there is going to break his moral code for you one last time and make a fool of himself in public, because of you, the very least you can do is sit there, shut your foolish mouth, and watch him!”
I granted all desires
All you had to do was ask
Knew I’d always gave in, yes you did
I’ve done it all along and I’d do it all again
But what you don’t understand is…
Maya bowed her head at the degradation of being taken to task in such a manner. Even more shameful was the knowledge that the other woman was right. And so she sat obediently, literally at the edge of her seat, and listened intently to Phoenix’s lyrical voice.
I would break every law for you (yeah, yeah, yeah)
Send innocents to jail for you (yeah, yeah, yeah)
I’d cross a burning bridge for you (yeah, yeah, yeah)
You know I watch Pink Princess for you (yeah, yeah, yeah)
I’d endure financial strain
Buying you burgers in pouring rain
Yes, I would die for you, Maya
But would you do the same?
Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh
She looked up with a jolt at the verse, her breath catching in her throat. Slowly, her eyes drifted between Franziska and Edgeworth, searching their expressions for any sign of confirmation—or denial. But there was none. Only truth.
Her voice was barely a whisper.
“…It’s true, then? He seriously did… almost send an innocent person to jail—because of me? He ran across that burning bridge, not for Iris… but for me?”
“I was there, Maya, he really did,” Larry told her. “I begged and pleaded with him not to, but he was hell-bent on saving you. His last words were ‘I need to get to Maya!’ Forget throwing his hand on a blade for you, that man loves you so much he literally nearly died for you.”
“That crazy, stupid, wonderful fool!” She breathed, shaking her head in wonder.
“He was in the hospital after falling into that river, Miss Fey,” Edgeworth confirmed somberly. “I had to take over his duties as defense attorney because his health was in such peril.”
“Miles was in Europe at the time,” Franziska added, her voice softening. “My fiancé chartered an overnight jet back to the States the moment he learned Phoenix was hospitalized.”
“He didn’t want you to know, Pal,” Gumshoe chimed in quietly. “I think he didn’t want you to feel awkward… or obligated toward him. Not if he wasn’t sure how you felt.”
“He knows now,” the artist muttered, blushing faintly. “While you girls were in the restroom, Edgy showed him that card.”
“I’m truly sorry, Miss Fey, if we’ve overstepped,” Edgeworth said earnestly, his eyes full of contrition. “We meant no disrespect. It’s just… You and Wright were instrumental in Franziska and me finding each other. We always hoped to return the favor someday—not that either of you made it easy. He was so maddeningly bull-headed, always denying that you had feelings for him. For some reason, he seemed convinced you only saw him as an older brother… or some kind of ‘old man.’ Short of forcing you to write a confession letter—which you would never have done—I didn’t know how else to prove to him that his feelings weren’t unrequited.”
Maya blinked rapidly against the prickly sensation that stung her eyes.
“Oh, please, don’t apologize, Mr. Edgeworth. Not you. Anyone but you.” She fought back the tears of heartfelt affection and gratitude threatening to consume her as she smiled at the handsome prosecutor. “Not after all you’ve done for Nick and me. For what you keep trying to do for us. It must be so hard for you, trying to talk logical sense into two incredibly stubborn people who are both…”
“Complete and utter blathering fools?” Franziska offered helpfully, her smile warm, her tone teasing. “Who completely deserve each other?”
“If loving Phoenix Wright makes me a fool,” Maya whispered, her voice catching, “then I never want to be considered a genius.”
Despite feeling lighthearted for the first time that night, there was a lump in her throat as she listened to the man she loved singing the next verse.
Your Steel Samurai TV show
Makes my brain go numb
But it brings you so much joy, who cares if I think that it is dumb?
Woman/child, zany girl
That’s just what you are
Always making me smile, whether close nearby or far
“You know,” Larry said thoughtfully. “He’s no Michael Bolton, but this song actually is kind of romantic! I mean, he’s personalized the lyrics specifically for you, Maya.”
The lady in red didn’t answer. Her heart was too full. Her eyes were clenched tightly closed as she listened to Phoenix’s beautiful voice, hoping nobody would notice the tears of guilt, shame, and self-loathing falling out of them.
I’d endure financial strain
Buying you burgers in pouring rain
Yes, I would die for you, Maya
But would you do the same?
Maya was full-on sobbing now, uncaring that she was ruining her freshly applied makeup.
A silly red dress.
That was what this had all come down to. She’d acted like a spoiled, entitled brat—all because he hadn’t complimented her on that stupid new dress. And why? Because she’d decided, in her infinite immaturity, that that would be the way to measure his love?
How could she have been so blind?
He’s been saying ‘I love you’—in actions, not words—for years now. Four whole years. And I never even noticed.
One by one, the memories came flooding in.
Every burger he’d bought her, sometimes when he barely had enough for one meal—always making sure she ate, even if it meant he didn’t.
Every single cheesy Steel Samurai show and movie he’d sat through, bleary-eyed after long days at work, never complaining, just because it made her happy.
Fan conventions. Weekend trips with Pearly. Amusement parks, zoos, shopping sprees at random shopping malls—never once begrudged, always on his tab.
She’d taken it all, never thinking twice. He’d never once made her feel guilty for it. Never once asked for anything in return.
And that was before she even counted the big things—like the way he’d thrown himself between her and death more than once. The way he’d defended her, protected her, saved her. The way he’d come running through fire to get to her, no questions asked.
And nearly lost his life for it.
My body feels afire
Being near you it just fans the flames
You are my heart’s true desire
Why is it you can’t see it, Maya baby?
Maya’s eyes remained tightly shut, her tears still falling, unstoppable. She felt someone quietly slip a stack of napkins into her hand. She took them silently, dabbing at her cheeks, her lips pressed together to keep the sobs from escaping. But inside, her heart was screaming back at him, louder than the music itself.
I do see it now, Nick. I swear I do! I swear on my mother’s and sister’s graves … I will doubt the morning sun will rise before I ever doubt your love again!
But darlin’ I’d still break every law for you (yeah, yeah, yeah)
Send innocents to jail for you (yeah, yeah, yeah)
I’d cross a burning bridge for you (yeah, yeah, yeah)
You know I watch Pink Princess for you (yeah, yeah, yeah)
I’d endure financial strain
Buying you burgers in pouring rain
Yes, I would die for you, Maya
But would you do the same?
“Hey, Pal, are you alright?” Gumshoe asked gently, eyeing Maya’s tear-streaked face with concern. “Why are you crying? Phoenix loves you so much, he didn’t even care who knew it—that’s why he sang that whole song in front of everyone! You should be happy!”
“Yeah, Maya, please don’t cry!” Larry pleaded, looking panicked. “I mean… It’s the thought that counts, right? The lyrics weren’t that bad!”
“Silence, you fools!” Franziska barked, making them both jump. “She is not crying because she hates that foolishly sentimental song. Those are tears of joy, not misery!”
She crossed her arms and gave them both a withering glare.
“I realize it may be difficult for your simple male brains to comprehend, but women do not always cry for the reasons you think. Sometimes, we cry because we are overwhelmed by happiness, or because the depth of a moment touches our hearts, not just our tear ducts! We can be a bit more complex than your fragile egos can handle.”
But would you do the same?
Would you do the same?
Oh, would you do the same
Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh…
As the song ended, Maya finally looked up at her friends, her tear-stained face baring streaky eye makeup, a slightly runny nose, and the biggest ear-to-ear grin on the planet.
“You know what, guys? She’s absolutely right! I’m the happiest girl in the whole wide world!”
Chapter 13: Dirty Dancing
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
The insatiable Burger Queen had never been known for her athleticism. Her idea of exercise usually topped out at lifting food to her mouth and flushing the toilet! Phoenix once quipped that the only reason she wasn’t 400 pounds from her never-ending food consumption was that she burned off the calories by constantly running her mouth!
It was truly one of those freak-of-nature things that Maya had managed to stay willowy, despite the inexplicable combination of a sedentary and gluttonous lifestyle. Slim, but still far from athletic.
However, the moment the impromptu pianist finished his song and, blushing, took his final bow to the sound of whistles and cheers, her slender, high-heeled legs launched into such a lightning sprint toward him that she could’ve put an Olympic gold medalist to shame.
He had started making his way back to their table, his journey slightly delayed as every step he took was met with eager handshakes, back-slaps, or some performance kudos from all the effusive bar patrons he encountered along the way. He smiled and ducked his head shyly as he murmured his thanks, still red-faced from the unaccustomed lavish praise and attention, all the while vowing to himself never to try to become a celebrity of any sort who would have to deal with this sort of unrestrained devotion daily. At least there were no paparazzi flashing cameras in his face, though!
Although his concentration was divided between his adoring fans and his targeted path, his eyes somehow never managed to lose sight of the can’t-miss red blur that was dashing toward him, hurtling through the crowd like a pint-sized quarterback.
He reflexively held out his arms, partially in an attempt to catch the faster-than-a-speeding-bullet object zooming toward him, and partially to keep from being knocked over like a bowling pin by the sheer vigor of the inevitable upcoming impact.
He was successful in only one of his endeavors.
Her body collided full force with his. He tightly wrapped his arms protectively around her, ensuring she had full use of him as a cushioned landing as he toppled backward towards the ground, with Maya winding up sprawled on top of him.
Luckily, the gushing crowd had continued following him up until this point. The fall was mostly broken at the last split-second, as a couple of guys managed to catch him right before his head hit the ground, so he, therefore, landed mostly on his rear-end, and the only thing that ended up being hurt was his dignity.
“Thanks, guys!” The lauded performer managed to wheeze to the helpful men as they retreated with the rest of the crowd at last. He remained there in the bizarre half-sitting, half-laying position for another moment, breathlessly winded as the object of his affection lay there on top of him, frantically raining kisses all over every inch of his face.
“Nick!” The love of his life finally paused in her slew of smooches and looked down at him with an impish twinkle in her eye. “Nick, you goofball! You were supposed to catch me!”
He half-laughed, half-groaned as he struggled to get to his feet. “I’m a lawyer, lady, not a linebacker! And you’re slightly larger than the old pigskin!”
“I didn’t want you to catch me like a football, silly!” With more grace than Phoenix could muster, she managed to get to her feet first and graciously extended her hand to pull him up. “I wanted you to catch me in your arms and lift me over your head like they did in that scene in Dirty Dancing!”
“I’m no Patrick Swayze either,” he chuckled as he rose, taking her proffered hand and planting a kiss on it. “Or Fred Astaire. Surely you can’t expect me to play piano, sing, and dance?”
“You were able to do one of those, Wright,” Edgeworth unexpectedly cut in. Unnoticed by the duo, he and the rest of their friends had all come to join them where they now stood. The tea-lover flashed his best shit-eating grin. “Let’s not get too ahead of ourselves now!”
“I’ll give you a hint, which one it was, Pal!” Gumshoe laughed. “It wasn’t the playing!”
“Yeah, but could he ever belt out that tune!” Larry enthused. “Since when can you sing, Nick?”
“You never know what you can do until you try, Larry. I didn’t know I could, either! I swear to you, prior to this spur-of-the-moment performance, my only belted ballads have been in the shower.”
“You are most definitely a more worthy singer than a pianist, Phoenix Wright,” Franziska conceded, treating him to his first-ever non-virulent smile. “But…do not quit your day job.”
“Don’t worry,” Phoenix deadpanned. “I wouldn’t dream of taking your favorite courtroom adversary/whipping boy away from you.”
Edgeworth pulled his fiancée to his side and rested his chin on top of her head.
“Just the former, Wright. Franziska has given me her word that she’s going to refrain from lashing any of you anymore, except with her tongue, tonight’s little slip-up notwithstanding!”
“You mean you whipped Nick tonight, too, Ms. Von Karma?” The village leader looked astonished.
“Too? She whipped you, Maya?” He exclaimed.
Franziska at least had the decency to blush.
“It was only one tiny lash in both cases, and desperate times called for desperate measures tonight!” She insisted. “Somebody had to attempt to whip some sense into both of you fools!”
“I can’t argue with that one, can I?” The logic enthusiast sighed. “Not that I ever could win any sort of battle of wits with this woman!”
“Join the club!” Phoenix laughed, draping an arm around Maya’s shoulders and dropping a kiss on top of her head. She blushed prettily.
“Of all the things to have in common!” Edgeworth chuckled, shaking his head. He smiled broadly at the new couple. “However, I assure you all, becoming a reformed whipper is a work in progress. And regardless, ultimately, it worked, right? The ends did wind up justifying the means.”
“I guess she’s right about that, Nick.” Maya smiled adoringly at her new swain. “Ms. Von Karma was the sole reason I stuck around to listen to that wonderful birthday gift from you.”
“From me, too,” the DA informed them dryly. “After your unceremonious dethroning of him from his piano bench, Wright, I’m the one who was tasked with bribing Mr. Willie Effastop with a fifty-dollar bill to prevent him from charging the stage during your performance. Consider me and Franziska’s ‘debt’ to you crazy kids henceforth repaid!”
“Yes, we’re now completely even! Although in your case, it did cost extra, so I’m sorry, Edgeworth.” The defense attorney barely stifled an embarrassed laugh. “Thanks so much!”
“You’re welcome,” Edgeworth sniggered. “Then I had to pay him an additional fifty dollars to stop bawling, so deeply was he dejected at how boisterously the patrons cheered at your announcement that you were taking over for him! He continued to weep bitter tears during your entire song about how they had applauded more at hearing that news more than they had for anything he had played the entire night!”
“Tough crowd, eh?” Phoenix was openly cracking up now. Maya playfully swatted him on the arm and told him it was mean to laugh, which he supposed it was.
“Indeed,” the slate-haired man agreed. “I’m torn between putting the poor croaky pianist out of his – and the customers’ – misery and suggesting he carry on as a mute piano player if he ever wants to win any favors with the audience, or suggesting you take over the gig in his stead.”
“Forget it, Edgeworth.” Phoenix shook his head vehemently. “I’m going to take your fiancée’s advice and not quit my day job. For one, I love squaring off against both of you in court far too much. And for another, I’m not meant to be in the spotlight! This was a one-time deal only.”
“But you were so good at it, Nick!” Larry insisted. “I was so surprised how well that song turned out, seeing as how you claimed earlier how you don’t do well with planned or rehearsed material.”
“I don’t, Larry, and it wasn’t.” The ivory-tickler rubbed the back of his neck and grinned sheepishly. “Tonight’s little ditty of I Would Break Every Law for You was a 100% Phoenix Wright unplanned original, and 110% pulled out of thin air on a whim.”
“Much like when you scream Objection in the courtroom?” Franziska ribbed.
“And when you mercilessly harangue the witnesses?” Edgeworth joked.
“I’m feeling a trifle wounded and a little bit ganged up on here!” Phoenix feigned a pout.
“So go make up a song about it, Pal!” Gumshoe snorted and pantomimed playing on an imaginary keyboard.
“No way, guys,” he grinned. “Sorry to disappoint, but it’ll be a cold day in hell before I ever play piano or perform in public again!”
“I never dreamed it would be warmer outside than it is in there,” the Kurain head commented as she stepped out into the balmy night air.
She and her nouveau beau had managed to tear themselves away from the group at long last, using the appearance of Lana and Ema Skye at their table as an excuse to steal away for a bit and get some time alone together. Their friends had been too busy joyously playing catch-up with the sisters to notice their sudden absence.
“Aha! So, you’re at last going to admit you were freezing your little heinie off in there?” He teased. “And therefore, wished you had listened to me and bought a cover-up?”
“Holy Odin and all the little cherubs, I hate it when you’re right!” Maya pretended to scowl, but she was so happy to finally have Phoenix all to herself, even if it was just out in the deserted, dim alleyway behind the bar, that she couldn’t hold it for long. Finally, she collapsed, laughing against the lawyer’s broad chest.
“OK, you win, Nick!” She straightened up and playfully tweaked his nose. “Savor these words: you were right, and I was wrong. There, are you happy now?”
“To have finally bested you in a battle of wits for the first time? I’m happier than a pup with two tails!”
“Good, then I’m going to take advantage of your cheery disposition and finally ask you what I’ve been dying to since I heard that song for me.” She tilted her head to the side questioningly. “Those lyrics you sang…did you really mean them?”
“Each and every word,” he replied with heartfelt sincerity.
“Gotcha! So, you finally admit it! You totally find the Steel Samurai mind-numbingly dumb!”
“That’s all you got out of that entire song, which I risked humiliating myself in public for?!” He stared at her, agog, his jaw slack.
“Nope.” She shot him a mischievous grin. “But I had to get you back for that PMS crack somehow, didn’t I, Nick?”
“OK, you got me. I deserved that. But argh! I have no idea what I was thinking when I said what I did!” He buried his head in his hands. “I am so sorry about that, Maya. For this whole mess that happened tonight…I take full responsibility for it all. Can you ever forgive me?”
Remorseful indigo eyes regarded her pleadingly.
The old Maya Fey, the self-serving young girl who had always tried to call the shots, would have accepted the apology and been happy to have won the battle and gotten her own way as usual. But she was an adult now. And the grown woman that Franziska had kept lecturing her to be that night couldn’t accept Phoenix giving in this time. Not when she had hardly been blameless for that evening’s calamities.
She looked up into his handsome face, then caught her breath at the intensity of his gaze. Any thoughts of the millions of things she wanted to say to him vanished from her mind as she stared back, hypnotized by the kaleidoscope of emotions she saw in the sapphire depths, knowing they matched what was reflected in her own. Although reluctant to break the spell, there were things she knew he needed to hear first. She drew back slightly and looked at him earnestly.
“N-Nick…” she began, her voice trembling slightly. “I can forgive you anything. I only hope that you can forgive me. I’m so sorry.”
“You’re sorry?” His tender expression was replaced by one of incredulity. “Maya, you have nothing to apologize for! This whole mess tonight was my fault!”
She shook her head.
“You’re wrong, Nick. There’s a lot I need to apologize for. For being such a diva about this dress, for acting like such a little snot with Tiffany, for completely winding you when I unwittingly tackled you earlier tonight with my clumsy Dirty Dancing reenactment attempt…”
Phoenix laughed softly and drew her into the warm circle of his arms. Gazing down at her, she saw so much unmasked love on his face that it brought tears to her eyes.
“Don’t you dare apologize,” he whispered huskily. “Because it was the second time tonight, Maya Fey, that you took my breath away.”
The psychic didn’t trust herself to speak at that moment; she was afraid that if she did, the magical dream she felt like she was in would end.
And if this was indeed just a dream, she never, ever, wanted to wake up.
Notes:
A/N: Yes, I could have ended the story here, but I am still struggling with a more justifiably fitting ending for these crazy kids to atone for all their angst! However, we are rounding the bend. This is the penultimate chapter, which I sincerely hope you enjoy because thus far, it's been my favorite one to write, even though Phoenix is no Patrick Swayze (who would NEVER drop a girl!) :p
Chapter 14: Turnabout Forever Fools
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
“I have so much more to apologize for than just being a clueless idiot with Tiffany tonight.” Phoenix took a small step back from Maya, his head bowed in shame. “I’m sorry it had to come to this—Edgeworth confronting me with that card, Franziska literally whipping sense into me—before I could see what everyone else, from your baby cousin to Larry Butz, already knew. Looking at your beautiful face right now… I feel every bit the fool that the Wild Mare has always accused me of being. And I can’t fathom how I could have missed it for so long.”
“Missed what?” She breathed.
“The love in your eyes.”
Tentatively, he reached for her hand, which she gave him willingly, pleasantly surprised by how good it felt as he traced circles on top of it with his thumb before raising her fingertips and softly brushing each of them with his lips.
“Historically, I’ve never been the brightest bulb in the drawer when it came to the ladies, but with you, I’m ultra-embarrassed that I’ve been so dumb and so damn blind. We’re both pretty unconventional, and I guess I used to think we were friends mostly out of self-protection rather than anything else. But how could I ever ask for someone more loyal to me than you? You’ve always been around whenever I’ve needed you, from channeling Mia to supporting me in court to taking a Taser for me while trying to gather evidence. You did it, expecting nothing in return, except maybe a little friendship. I’d be lost without it. I’d be lost without you. You brighten up my whole world, Maya.”
He lightly traced her lips with his fingertips, staring at her in wonder before he went on.
“That beautiful, contagious smile of yours… that irrepressible youthful spirit… that effervescent light you carry with you—it’s brought so much joy, fun, and color into this boring lawyer’s life. It’s taken me a while, but I’ve finally realized where my heart truly lies. And in spite of the fear that my feelings weren’t returned—which may have kept me from showing it sooner—there’s always been a part of my heart that belonged to you, Maya Fey. Now, I’m ready to give it all to you… If you’re willing to accept it.”
Her eyes shimmered, the unmasked eros etched in every line of her face. “I accept all of you, Nick. And all you have to give.”
Phoenix leaned down and softly pressed a kiss to her forehead. Then he flashed her a wicked grin.
“That was a kiss of friendship. Now I’ll show you the kiss I’ve been wanting to give you for far too long.”
His eyes locked on hers. Sapphire against topaz. He leaned forward and kissed her, slowly, reverently, no longer quite so surprised that this was happening, that he needed her so badly. She responded in kind, letting him know now with all certainty that his ardor was most definitely not one-sided.
They molded together, fitted against one another with stunning perfection. Maya had never felt anything like this; exploring the taste of him, feeling the sure strength of his arms encircling her, breathing in his musky, masculine scent. It felt as though she’d found a moment of forever. Like this was how they should’ve always been.
When they finally parted, both were breathless and panting. Phoenix rested his forehead against Maya’s, pulling her so tightly against him she could feel his rapid heartbeat against hers.
“I love you,” she whispered against his chest.
“What was that? I didn’t hear you.”
“Don’t push me.”
“I love you, too,” he said. He put his cheek against hers. “So much.”
Maya’s throat was aching with unshed tears.
“I always wondered what it would take to make you realize you loved me. One near-death experience? Two? A cross-state move? A killer red dress?” She managed a watery smile even as two teardrops rolled down her cheeks.
“A boot to the head?” Phoenix gently brushed the tears from her face with his fingers, then left his hand resting on her cheek. She nestled into it, turning her head slightly and softly kissing his palm as he continued. “Nah, just a martini to the face!”
“I was so mad at you at that point!” She burst out. “All I wanted was for you to finally tell me I looked attractive and sophisticated—and instead, it seemed like you preferred that cheap, trampy waitress to me! I just… I so desperately wanted at least a second look from you. And when you couldn’t even give me that—when it felt like you were saving all your appreciation for that Jezebel—it hurt so much. I was so jealous, I couldn’t even see straight!”
“Objection! For the record, Miss Fey—you might not have noticed, but I did look at you. As much as I thought was wise. Any more, and I’d never have been able to look away again.” Phoenix gave her a sly wink before his tone softened. “I’m sorry I was such a damn idiot that I couldn’t figure out what was wrong when you were acting all catty and weird tonight… or that you were just trying to get my goat by threatening to go out with Larry Butz.”
His cheeks turned pink.
“But you’d always called me ‘old man’. It honestly never occurred to me that you may have been jealous, that you saw me that way.”
She stared at him, dumbfounded.
“I was just messing with you, Nick! Of course, I don’t actually think you’re an old man! Don’t you know you’re freaking gorgeous? I mean, hello—have you seen yourself? You’re a total hunk! Especially in those ass-hugging jeans! There’s a reason Slutzilla was all over you tonight!”
“You really think I’m attractive, Maya? Even with these spikes?” His face turned a deeper shade of crimson. “I was thinking of maybe cutting them off, you know. This beautiful girl I’m truly, madly, deeply in love with called me a porcupine-headed prick earlier tonight…”
“I swear, I didn’t mean it! Don’t you dare! I will hurt you so badly if you touch that iconic hair, Nick!”
She threw her arms around his neck, protectively covering said spikes with her hands. The thick jet-black hair that reached his collar was silkier and softer than it looked, and she threaded her fingers through it, over each peak, noticing it sprang back up no matter how hard she flattened her palm against it.
“Oh my God,” she gasped. “They’re real.”
“I kept telling you they were, Maya. You just never believed me! Sure, I use a dab of gel and all, but yes, they’re absolutely real.”
“I love them, Nick. I really do. I love everything about you. They’re part of what makes you, you! Give me your absolute word that you won’t cut them.”
“You have my word, my fair lady. I shall shun the shears for you.”
Phoenix drew her close and dropped a kiss on top of her head. He rested his chin there, marveling how perfectly Maya fit against his body, like a jigsaw puzzle piece customized just for him. He pulled back a bit and cupped her face in his hands, running his finger along her jawline as he stared searchingly into her eyes.
“And you already know I would break every law for you.”
“You’ve been saying I love you with your actions for the past four years, Nick.” She caught his hand and pressed it against her cheek. “I swear to you that I will doubt that the tide rises by the moon before I ever question your love again. Just … promise me you’ll stop with the near-dead experiences on my behalf, you brave, reckless jerk! Don’t you dare die on me, Phoenix Wright! I’ll kill you if you do! Then I will have Pearly channel you back, and then kill you some more!”
“I’m not going anywhere.” He couldn’t help but laugh at this sincerely passionate but still so Maya proclamation. “I guess this means I’ll have to provide you with some other sort of tangible, non-life-threatening proof of my love?”
She shot him a confused, dark-eyed look. “I thought that’s what the song was for?”
“Consider it more of a loving birthday gift for my girl, then.” Phoenix was already digging into his jeans pocket.
“Nick, you can’t possibly give me another present! You already put together my birthday gathering, and got me this outfit…” She looked up at him through her lashes with a soft, almost coquettish smile. “Most importantly, you’ve already given me your heart. What more could I ever ask for?”
“This gift is something I bought two years ago,” he explained. “It was after the Engarde case when you were kidnapped. I vowed to myself that if you ever came back to me, I’d give this to you to prove to you how much I’d missed you and how much you meant to me. But then the whole Hazakura Temple incident happened right after, so then I figured that that would be an even better opportunity to show you how much I cared…”
“So why didn’t you?”
“I could give you a million excuses, Maya, but each would be more pathetic than the next. The timing was never right…you thought I was confused about Iris at the time…you were grieving over losing your mother… Ultimately, the truth is, I’m a complete wuss that would give the Cowardly Lion from the Wizard of Oz a run for his money, OK?”
Phoenix’s face was once again the same shade as Maya’s dress.
“That’s why I bought you the dress as a ‘backup’ gift of sorts. I figured if I still couldn’t get the guts to give you this, at least your best friend wouldn’t be empty-handed on your milestone birthday, right?”
She giggled. “For the longest time, I thought you were a sissy-boy because of your fear of heights! You do realize your irrational fear of little ol’ me is ten times worse, don’t you?”
He grimaced. “I do.”
“You also realize I’m going to break your balls over this until you’re 100, right? And tell all future generations of Fey-Wrights as well?”
“Hopefully, you’ll also be telling our grandchildren and great-grandchildren all of my romantic heroics as well while you besmirch my name!” Phoenix then produced a small gold-colored box and pressed it into her palm. “And you better be wearing this still when you tell it!”
“There better not be an engagement ring in there, Nick! As much as we both know I’d marry you in a New York minute if you asked, I refuse to have to tell the tale of how Grandpa Nick proposed to Grandma Maya in the dark alley of a hole-in-the-wall bar!”
“Just open it already!” He bit back a sigh of exasperation. Now that he’d finally plucked up the courage to give his soul mate her long-overdue gift, he was dying to see her reaction to it.
She flipped open the velvet-lined jeweler’s box, looked at the exquisite, shiny heart-shaped gold pendant on a braided gold necklace inside, and gasped in delight.
“Oh my gosh, Nick, it’s beautiful!”
“It’s a locket,” he explained, smiling lovingly at her. “I always hoped that if and when I finally grew a pair and gave this to you, I’d have already been told that I had your heart. Now, I give you mine in exchange, as well as a part of me to have with you to keep close to your heart, always.”
The diviner carefully opened up the delicate locket, and tears filled her eyes.
Phoenix had placed a tiny photo of Mia on one side of the locket and group one of him, her, and Pearly on the other. Everyone that she’d ever known and loved, with every fiber of her being, all together now. In one place. To be worn by her heart, now and always. It was the most wonderful birthday present in the world.
She looked up at the man she’d loved for so long, her eyes sparkling with joyful tears.
“I love it. It’s the most perfect, amazing gift I’ve ever been given in my life. I swear to you I’ll never take it off.”
He took the locket from her and closed it, turned it over in her palm, then clasped his hand over hers.
“It has an inscription on the back, too. I’m not very good with words, outside the courtroom…but it’s honestly how I feel about you, Maya. How I’ve felt about you for some time. And how I’ll feel about you for the rest of my life.”
Maya read the engraving on the back, and the tears brimming in her eyes spilled over freely. Without hesitation, she fisted a hand in Phoenix’s shirt and drew him down to her, looking deeply into his eyes. She placed the other hand on his chest, feeling his undying love with every heartbeat.
“I will never love anybody the way I love you, Nick,” she whispered. Then, with her free hand, she placed it behind his head and drew his lips to hers.
They kissed again—and this time, it felt familiar. They moved as though they’d always known how to, his arm finding her waist, her hand settling over his chest, the pressure of his lips perfectly matched to hers. They had each other memorized.
For a long moment, neither moved. Neither breathed. They simply… existed together. The tension bled away. The kiss was still unpolished, still tinged with urgency—but only because it was real. The most honest, truthful moment they’d ever shared.
Dangling from Maya’s fingertips, momentarily forgotten, was her new most prized possession, the locket which the love of her life had given to her, with the promise of love everlasting engraved on it, and in her heart, forever.
I love you madly, without question or reason, and care naught if it’s for a lifetime or a season.
THE END
Notes:
A/N: Phaya’s courtship story is finally done. This was a very hard chapter to write…As I know, Phoenix is no poet and Maya is no swooning Victorian heroine… Nevertheless, I tried to be as OC as I could be here, while still keeping some humor, and giving this OTP the ending they deserved. Hope you enjoyed!
I’ve fallen so deeply in love with these characters that I’ve decided to continue the saga as a trilogy, called Ace Attorney: Turnabout Lawful Love. This was part 1 of a 3-part series, with the final installment taking place from pre-Apollo Justice to post-Dual Destinies called Turnabout Everlasting.
Attention, all Edgeworth/Fredgeworth fans! In case any of you caught on or were wondering what Miles meant in Chapter 13 when he told Phoenix that his “debt to him was now repaid” … The answer to that mystery will be solved in the supplementary prequel to this tale, which is Miles Edgeworth’s and Franziska Von Karma’s story, now completed, and is called The Ties That Bind. Hope y’all will give it a read!
Chapter 15: Epilogue: Shut Up and Dance
Notes:
A/N (6GunSally): Yo DAWG! I heard you like Fan Fiction! So I wrote a fan fiction about a fan fiction so you could fan-girl (or boy) while you fan fic! I think everyone was drunk. That’s my excuse for this… (I, however, was not drunk, though you might have thought that…JP—I hope you liked it! This took longer than I’d anticipated-stupid plot bunnies…This story is written in homage to JordanPhoenix. I just read the first two stories in her trilogy, LAWFUL LOVE. I’ve been giddy ever since and then this happened. (This takes place between “Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman” and “Turnabout Everlasting”) This is, if you will, a fan fiction of a fan fiction. I’m not sure if this is early or late, but Happy Birthday! Thanks for being awesome!
AN: (Jordan Phoenix) – I never thought about giving this story an epilogue like I did with the Ties That Bind, yet somehow, the hilarious and talented 6GunSally managed to make this fit so well and I loved it so much, that I decided to make it the official story epilogue, which then segues, as a lot of you know, into chapter one of Turnabout Everlasting, the third installment of the series, now in progress. Now read on, and enjoy, and laugh your butt off like I did! (psst! Sally must be psychic, as it was my birthday, the day before she posted this!)
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Like that, it was done. Final. No ifs, ands, or maybes. Phoenix and Maya were a thing.
They walked slowly back into the frigid establishment, her arm wrapped around his and her head resting against his bicep. Her other hand was occupied in tracing the locket at her throat. Neither of them spoke.
They hadn’t entered yet when they were met by loud music pulsing in the now darkened barroom. Maya looked up when Phoenix hesitated at the door. He was frowning.
“Nick?”
“They’ve never had a DJ before,” he said.
“It’s probably Olga’s iPod shuffle,” Maya said. “She’s been trying to sneak it into the sound system ever since she got that weird compilation of Euro techno.”
Phoenix still didn’t move to enter the Borscht Bowl Club. “Um, Maya…”
“Yeah?”
“You’re not going to ask me to dance, are you?”
Maya put her head down and touched the locket. After everything. Their little arguments, the revelations, their acceptance of the inevitable—she didn’t want to pressure him into doing something he wasn’t comfortable with.
But then, she did like dancing.
“Oh, don’t you dare look back. Just keep your eyes on me.”
Phoenix frowned apprehensively when Maya didn’t answer. He couldn’t dance—not really. He certainly didn’t want to jump up in front of everyone there and show off how terrible a dancer he was—not when he’d just won over the establishment with his serenade.
He let her pull him back inside. They’d turned off the main lights, and the room was lit only by the moving coloured track lights and the reflections off the mirrored ball hanging above the floor.
Some obnoxious couple was showing their moves while the crowd surrounded the stage, cheering them on. Phoenix watched the guy spin his girl around and then lift her bodily into the air. Her slender figure arched gracefully, and her arms extended—just like in Dirty Dancing…
Maya was gaping at the dance floor.
“Hey, Nick, is that—”
“Come on,” he said, steering her back to their table.
He was shocked to find Gumshoe and Larry sitting alone.
“Hey,” Phoenix said, joining them at the table, “Where’d Edgeworth and Franziska—”
Larry just nodded toward the crowd and the obnoxious dancers.
Phoenix’s eyes nearly bugged out of his head.
I said, “You’re holding back,” She said, “Shut up and dance with me!”
This woman is my destiny
She said, “Ooh-ooh-hoo, Shut up and dance with me.”
Maya grabbed his arm excitedly, “Nick!”
“Huh? What happened?”
“Is that—?” she pointed.
This couldn’t be. Was it really them?
Gumshoe chuckled.
“Yeah, that’s Mister Edgeworth and Franziska. We usually don’t let him have liquor. Wine or beer, sure. But liquor makes him brave.”
Phoenix was frowning at the big detective as he shook in silent laughter. Maya punched him.
“You never told me that Edgeworth could dance!”
“I didn’t know!” Phoenix winced, rubbing the spot on his arm where she’d whacked him.
We were victims of the night,
The chemical, physical, kryptonite
Helpless to the bass and the fading light
Phoenix was eyeing Maya with a nervous sidelong glance when Larry returned with more beers for the group. He loved her—that much was true. But there were some things about her that he was less than enamoured of. Like her insatiable appetite for burgers and her ability to punch. He was definitely going to have a bruise.
Oh, we were bound to get together,
Bound to get together.
The next song was slow, and Phoenix nodded in greeting when Edgeworth and Franziska returned to the table. Both of them were flushed and breathing hard. He’d never seen Edgeworth so unguarded. Ever.
“Edgeworth,” Phoenix said, “when did you learn how to dance?”
Edgeworth was in the middle of undoing his cravat and shot him a heated glare. Well, that, at least, was familiar. The prosecutor pulled the white length of cloth from his neck and toyed with it in his hands.
“It’s not as if it’s very difficult,” he said with a smirk.
Franziska pushed past him and squeezed into the booth. “Oh, my poor feet!”
Gumshoe chuckled, and she glared at him.
Phoenix put his head down, but he was watching Maya surreptitiously and noting the hungry look in her eyes as she listened to Franziska go on about Edgeworth’s dancing. He frowned a little—one thing at a time. They’d already had a pretty crazy night. There would be time for dancing later, right?
She took my arm,
I don’t know how it happened.
“Are you really finished, Franziska?” Edgeworth asked with only the smallest hint of longing in his voice.
She looked up at him and smiled, “You should save some for later.”
Larry grinned.
Phoenix blushed. Maya kicked him under the table.
“Ow,” he said, “What?”
“I know you don’t want to, Nick, but would you be upset if I went and danced?” Maya said.
Phoenix couldn’t hide his relief. “No, not at all. Take one of these bums up there with you.”
He jerked his thumb at Larry and Gumshoe. The big detective startled and looked at the two of them; Larry was already leering at Maya.
Edgeworth cut in like a knight in shining magenta, “I’ll dance with you. If you don’t mind?”
Maya grinned, but she paused to look at Franziska. The other woman was stirring her drink, but she smiled and nodded.
“If it’ll get me off of my feet for a few minutes,” she said, laughing.
We took the floor and she said,
Maya followed behind him as he led the way toward the dance floor. He’d discarded his jacket, and Maya couldn’t help noticing that he kinda looked like a young John Travolta—a la Saturday Night Fever.
She turned once to look back at Phoenix. He was watching her from the booth.
She smiled.
“Oh, don’t you dare look back.
Just keep your eyes on me.”
Edgeworth took her hand and spun her into his arms. Phoenix couldn’t help the small prickle of envy that washed over him. He shot Franziska a meaningful look.
“You worry too much, Phoenix Wright,” she said and sipped her drink.
Phoenix grimaced and turned to watch Maya and Edgeworth on the dance floor. What if this changes things? Would she forever resent him if he couldn’t dance with her like that?
I said, “You’re holding back, “
She said, “Shut up and dance with me!”
Maya smiled up at him. He was ridiculously handsome. That made her feel guilty. But maybe Nick would notice this and maybe get a little stirred up. She liked him stirred up.
This woman is my destiny
She said, “Ooh-ooh-hoo,
Shut up and dance with me.”
Phoenix was so distracted watching the newly discovered love of his life dancing her heart out with his greatest rival. What the hell, Edgeworth?
He didn’t notice that Franziska was shoving Gumshoe along the curved seat of the booth. Pushing the big detective into Phoenix.
He did notice when they tumbled out of the booth, Gumshoe’s bulk all but crushing him to the floor.
Phoenix glared.
A backless dress and some beat up sneaks,
My discothèque, Juliet teenage dream.
I felt it in my chest as she looked at me.
Franziska was laughing as she hopped over them. Phoenix noticed that she’d discarded her shoes.
Oh man…
“Come along, Scruffy!” She called with a flip of her hand.
I knew we were bound to be together,
Bound to be together
Phoenix grunted in surprise when Gumshoe grabbed him around his trunk and carried him to the dance floor, following Franziska’s beckoning.
“Oh, God…” He closed his eyes. “Not this…”
She took my arm, I don’t know how it happened.
We took the floor and she said,
“Oh, don’t you dare look back. Just keep your eyes on me.”
Gumshoe propped him upright, and Phoenix found himself jammed between the burly detective and a very happy Edgeworth, and they proceeded to go-go-boy him. He could see Franziska in flashes between the two men dancing with Maya.
I said, “You’re holding back, “
She said, “Shut up and dance with me!”
Edgeworth grabbed his arm and tugged him away from Gumshoe; he motioned at the detective with his other hand. He started going through the steps slowly.
Phoenix was too irritated to notice right away that Edgeworth was trying to show him what to do. Gumshoe was following along on the other side of him. Phoenix had no choice but to move along with them.
This woman is my destiny
She said, “Ooh-ooh-hoo, Shut up and dance with me.”
Maya and Franziska joined their line. So did the other random dancers. The group moved in one formation. Moving with the pulsing beat.
Phoenix couldn’t help but grin. This wasn’t so bad.
Oh, come on girl!
Franziska broke from the group and grabbed Edgeworth. They moved away from the group, eyes locked, bodies pressed together, and moving to the music.
Maya was watching them hungrily; she turned and looked up at Phoenix.
Deep in her eyes,
I think I see the future.
I realize this is my last chance.
He was locked in that gaze for an unquantifiable amount of time.
He couldn’t fight when she led him away from the group.
She took my arm,
I don’t know how it happened.
We took the floor and she said,
He spun her around; it just seemed like the natural thing to do. Then he pulled her close and let her dance.
“Oh, don’t you dare look back.
Just keep your eyes on me.”
I said, “You’re holding back, “
She said, “Shut up and dance with me!”
Notes:
WALK THE MOON - Shut Up and Dance
Emeralda2020 on Chapter 1 Wed 18 Mar 2020 03:13AM UTC
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<3 (Guest) on Chapter 15 Fri 09 Aug 2019 08:34AM UTC
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