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Jace's hands do things to Simon, and if Simon didn't know that Jace can't control himself whenever Simon is in the same room as him, there would be problems. There are problems as it is, at the moment, because Simon woke up to an empty bed and Jace's clothes all over his floor. Which is not unusual, since Jace has classes on Saturdays and Simon does not. But is a problem because Jace left the door to Simon's bedroom wide open and now Clary and Isabelle are in Simon's room.
"So," Isabelle says, looking around the room.
Simon very carefully doesn't look at the pile of Jace's clothes right by the bedside.
"You're up early on a Saturday," Clary says.
Clary is Simon's best friend and has been since the moment the two of them met. She has special privileges, which means that out of the two of them, Clary is the most likely to notice if things are out of place in Simon's room. Therefore, Clary is the obvious choice for the first strike.
"So, Fray, you missed some pretty wild cleansing on Tuesday," Simon says, burrowing deeper into his blankets.
Ever since the night when Jace and Alec woke everyone up because they thought the apartment was on fire, Simon goes to bed fully clothed. He doesn't want to be unprepared and naked if the apartment ever really does catch on fire. Clary knows this, which is why she goes straight for Jace's space on Simon's left. Not that Simon thinks of it as Jace's space, because Jace has his own bedroom, his own bed, and his own space.
Away from Simon.
"I already told her about it," Isabelle says.
She's lingering by the windows to the left of Simon's bed, and even though Simon knows it's because his windows have the best view, part of him can't help but think that Isabelle looks like every person in every movie about to drag a confession out of a guilty party. The guilty party being Simon. The confession being that he's been sleeping with her brother since the end of the Winter semester.
Not that any of it was intentional. Simon hadn't planned on being frustrated and alone with Jace on a Friday night. He'd been in the middle of studying for the second of his two finals for the Winter semester. Jace, who had been working instead of torturing himself, had popped into Simon's room to be his annoying, smug self. There had been no one else in the apartment, and Jace had just gotten more and more into Simon's space, until Jace had shifted a little too close. Then there had been a lot of making out and very little studying.
Simon had aced both exams, and he and Jace just hadn't ever stopped.
They hadn't ever stopped to clarify what it was that they were to each other, exactly, either. But it was like Jace had said when Simon had asked that they keep things private. There was just no point in rushing things when they were working out so well.
Which brought Simon back to his current problem, with Isabelle by his window and Clary making herself at home in Simon's room. He could hope that Jace's clothing would just blend into the general business of Simon's room, but it wasn't just the clothes. There was Jace's keyboard propped up behind Simon's guitar and stand, Jace's cologne on Simon's dresser, Jace's video games mixed into the messy pile of Simon's games. Simon could almost smell Jace on his sheets, a faded peppermint smell from Jace's shampoo.
"I'm screwed," Simon whispers into his blankets.
Clary gives him a questioning look, but Simon's phone starts vibrating and he takes his time untangling himself from his sheets to get it. When he does and sees that it's Jace video calling him, Simon considers throwing his phone across the room as a distraction.
"Why is Jace calling you so early in the morning?" Clary asks.
Which is, of course, what finally drags Isabelle's attention away from Simon's windows.
"Jace is calling you?" Isabelle asks. She's pensive, and that's never a good sign.
Simon has no choice but to answer the video call and hope that Jace doesn't say anything too incriminating.
"Good morning Lewis," Jace says, grinning into the phone. "Did I wake you?"
"No," Simon says, even as Clary sidles up close so that she's in the video. "I am awake, as you can clearly see."
Jace frowns and brings his phone closer to his face. "Are you in bed with Clary?" he asks.
Simon nods, even as Clary laughs right into his ear. "Yes," he says. "Isabelle is here too."
"Yes," Isabelle says, slowly, deliberately. "I am."
Jace freezes onscreen and Simon can only assume it's something in the way Isabelle said what she said that's making Jace react like that. It's their freaky Lightwood sibling thing and it's super inconvenient in this moment.
"Um," Jace says, shooting an apologetic look Simon's way. "I have to go. My class is starting in five minutes. Bye."
He cuts the connection and Simon is left with his phone in one hand and a very suspicious Isabelle Lightwood besides his bed.
"Simon," Isabelle says. "Why are Jace's clothes on your floor?"
-
In hindsight, Simon knows there were a million different explanations for why Jace's clothes were on his bedroom floor. He could have said that he borrowed some of Jace's clothes the last time they went out, because Jace refused to be seen with Simon when he was in his everyday clothes. Simon could have said that Jace came home drunk last night and Simon has been working out, but he's not that strong and his bed was closest. He could have said that Jace is a slob and just wanted to get on Simon's nerves. He could have even said that they mixed up their clothes when they went to the laundry room.
But no.
That's not what Simon says.
-
"You're being haunted?" Isabelle asks.
She's standing over Simon's bed, looking like a very suspicious avenging angel, Jace's button down in one hand and Jace's jeans in the other.
Simon does the only thing he can think of, he commits.
"Yes," Simon says. "And this is very clearly all your fault. First, Clary, then Alec, and now me. I don't want a demon haunting me, Isabelle."
"You know," Clary says. "He does have a point. Before Magnus came, we had things popping up all over the place. Simon could have a ghost."
Simon nods. He doesn't believe for a second that Clary is buying this, but as long as Isabelle doesn't ask too many questions, Simon can deal with Clary. They have a vow of secrecy and Clary owes Simon many, many favors.
Isabelle very carefully puts Jace's clothes back down on Simon's floor. "We really should have checked the history of this apartment before we rented it," she says. "Or we should call Magnus and have him do a full...what do you call the thing he does? A thing...a...a limpia. You get it."
"Cleansing," Simon tells her.
"Yeah, that," Isabelle says. "Is Magnus available?"
Clary shrugs. "Alec would know better than me."
Isabelle grins. "I'll ask Alec."
It turns out, Alec is not in the apartment, and no one can remember if he came home the night before. They have a moment of panic, until the three of them hear the locks on the front door, and Alec walks in humming and wearing the same clothes he had on yesterday.
"Well, well, well," Isabelle says.
Alec freezes with one foot into the apartment, staring wide-eyed at the three of them gathered outside of Simon's bedroom. Simon makes a mental note to buy Alec something nice, because he is the greatest distraction in the world. Simon couldn't ask for more.
"I'm going to go," Alec says.
Then, he steps right back out of the apartment and pulls the door closed. Isabelle is right behind him, and poor Alec, Simon thinks, he doesn't stand a chance.
-
"Simon has a ghost and we need Magnus," Isabelle tells Alec.
She hasn't stopped grinning since Alec walked back into the apartment and sat down on Simon's bed. Without Simon's permission. They're all there without Simon's permission, but Simon has gotten himself into this mess and he will die with his secrets.
"I'm not going to call Magnus on a Saturday, just because Lewis thinks there might be a ghost in his bedroom."
Simon nods. "Yeah," he says. "Magnus doesn't need to do this right now. We can wait until Monday."
Alec closes his mouth on whatever he was going to say and turns to stare at Simon. "Okay," he says. "What's wrong with you?"
"Nothing," Simon says.
Alec narrows his eyes. "You know, Izzy," he says. "Maybe we should call Magnus."
Isabelle and Alec exchange looks and have their moment, while Simon tries to tell Clary that he needs help without being obvious.
"What?" she mouths.
Simon does his best to mouth, "I'm sleeping with Jace," without being too obvious.
Clary gets it, because her eyes go wide and she gives Simon a thumbs up. The problem is that Clary isn't the only person in the room, and the Lightwoods, besides being weirdly intune with each other, are also very perceptive.
"I knew it," Isabelle says. "Jace is a horrible liar."
"Gross," Alec says.
-
They wait for Jace, because Simon won't admit to any relationship, secret or not, without Jace there to deal with his siblings. So, when Jace comes home at two in the afternoon, all four of them are still in Simon's room. Isabelle and Alec are going over their mom's emails and flipping through Max's school bills. Clary is next to Simon, both of them going through YouTube videos like they're going to watch all of them before Jace gets home.
"Hello?" Jace calls as soon as he's through the door. "Simon? Izzy?"
Isabelle drops the letter in her hand and grins at Jace as he comes through the door. Alec doesn't even bother looking away from his phone.
"Hello, brother," Isabelle says. "Guess what happened today?"
"What?" Jace asks, looking quickly at Simon.
Simon doesn't even pretend to help. This coming torture is the least that Jace deserves for leaving Simon alone with Isabelle all day. He hopes Isabelle never lets Jace live his secret relationship down.
Alec keeps flipping through his emails as he says, calm as can be, "Isabelle found out you and Lewis are secretly dating, and Lewis told us he was being haunted to try to get out of it."
"Oh," Jace says.
He looks at Simon, then at Isabelle and Alec, back at Simon, once at Clary, and then shrugs. "Well, yeah," he says. "Duh."
-
Sometimes, on some days, Simon really hates Jace.
But then, most days, he really, really doesn't.