Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

queen allura created a Groupchat

queen allura added sirpidgeot, cinnamon rolls, death take me now, kogayass, razzledazzle to the Groupchat

queen allura named the Groupchat: Hoes

Hoes ( 03:10 AM )

sirpidgeot: what the fuck Allura

sirpidgeot: why are you awake?? it's like 3 AM??

queen allura: Why are you awake?

sirpidgeot: okay, touché

sirpidgeot: still, what the fuck is this

queen allura: A?? Groupchat??

sirpidgeot: yeah i know,,,

sirpidgeot: i mean for what?

queen allura: Because apparently we've been friends for who knows how long yet we never have a gc and I want to talk to you guys without seeing all of your faces

queen allura: And do I need a reason to talk with my friends?

sirpidgeot: i

sirpidgeot: understandable have a nice day

Hoes ( 07:32 AM )

razzledazzle: what the fuck, Allura

cinnamon rolls: dude just scroll up

razzledazzle: Hunk,,,, my everything and more

razzledazzle: you know im too lazy to do that

cinnamon rolls: ...

queen allura: for gODS SAKE LANCE

queen allura: JUST SCROLL THE FUCK UP

razzledazzle: sheesh fine, calm your shit

razzledazzle: alyt, i get it

razzledazzle: sometimes i wanted to talk to u guys without seeing all ur ugly faces too

cinnamon rolls: excuse me

razzledazzle: of course not you, sweetie! ur a blessing among men

queen allura: Excuse me???

razzledazzle: not you too, 'Lura! ur a queen, a blessing among women!

sirpidgeot: eXCUSE ME????

razzledazzle: ur excused lmao

sirpidgeot: i

kogayass: what the hell is this.

queen allura: I SWEAR if anyone ask about this AGAIN

cinnamon rolls: scroll up Keith

razzledazzle: woah woah woAH

razzledazzle: what the hell is Mullet doing in this holy gc??

razzledazzle: and when??

razzledazzle: and WHY??

sirpidgeot: cuz he's our friend

sirpidgeot: and my favorite friend

kogayass: thanks Pidge, you're my favorite too.

sirpidgeot: <3

kogayass: <3

razzledazzle: eXCUSE ME??

sirpidgeot: ur excused bitch

queen allura: OHHHHHH

cinnamon rolls: SHOTS FIRED

razzledazzle: HUNK??? U TRAITOR

razzledazzle changed cinnamon rolls' name to sinnamon roll

sinnamon roll: eh, fair

kogayass: and here we have folks, a Lance McClain in his natural habitat.

razzledazzle: fight me

kogayass: meet me in the fucking pit

death take me now: No one is fighting in the pit.

death take me now: Go to your classes now.

cinnamon roll: whoops, sorry Shiro

razzledazzle: sorry dad

sirpidgeot: youre not my dad

death take me now: I have a Matthew Holt with me

sirpidgeot: im on my way to my class as we speak

kogayass: it's true, i saw him.

sinnamon roll: i, like the good cinnamon roll i am, wait hold on

sinnamon roll changed sinnamon roll's name to cinnamon roll

cinnamon roll: anyway

cinnamon roll: im in my class like the cinnamon roll i am

queen allura: This is why you're my favourite child

razzledazzle: oh YEAH??

razzledazzle: well,,,

razzledazzle: IM SHIRO'S FAVORITE

death take me now: Incorrect.

kogayass: it's Pidge.

sirpidgeot: wait wat

razzledazzle: oh wow i did not see it coming

razzledazzle: thEN IM CORAN'S

razzledazzle: where is that gorgeous man anyway??

queen allura: He refuses to have a phone

queen allura: Something about a bet with Alfor

sirpidgeot: wait,,,

razzledazzle: ??

cinnamon roll: yeah??

sirpidgeot: if im Shiro's, Lance is Coran's and Hunk is Allura's,,,

sirpidgeot: then what about our emo son??

razzledazzle: LMAO

cinnamon roll: that's unfair, our group has like, 7 people

cinnamon roll: and only 3 are considered adults

sirpidgeot: Allura just acts like one

queen allura: Eh true

queen allura: Most of the time I have absolutely no idea what I am doing at all

kogayass: i don't care.

kogayass: i'm an independent gay man, i dont need this shit.

death take me now: Keith, just last night I have to cook you dinner.

death take me now: All because you're too lazy to make one and I know you will starve yourself.

cinnamon roll: what

cinnamon roll: that's it

cinnamon roll: Keith you are coming to our dorm tonight

cinnamon roll: i'm gonna cook for you

razzledazzle: wHAT

razzledazzle: since when is this shit happening??

cinnamon roll: since i realize how Keith starve himself when he's too lazy

queen allura: Can I join?? I miss your cooking :( They're very great

queen allura: My cooking sucks

death take me now: Me too.

death take me now: Your cooking gives me life, it gives me reason to live and continue being a teacher in this uni.

cinnamon roll: thats a dark compliment

cinnamon roll: but ill take it! so everyone's coming to our dorm!

razzledazzle: w00t partay!!!1!!1!

sirpidgeot: and you didnt ask my permission because ...?

death take me now: How does a picture of Matt doing embarrassing things do for you?

sirpidgeot: 5 of it and it's a deal

cinnamon roll: okay! it's official! food party at our dorm!

cinnamon roll: also lance get your ass here, class is about to start

razzledazzle: shit

razzledazzle: gotta dash

death take me now: What the fuck, Lance.

kogayass: he says fuck.

sirpidgeot: DAD SWORE!!!

queen allura: Disappointed but not suprised

death take me now: Don't you guys have class?

queen allura: No class today

kogayass: my class starts at 10.

sirpidgeot: i AM at the class, inside the class and yet,,,

sirpidgeot: the teacher isnt inside

sirpidgeot: the teacher is you

sirpidgeot: Shiro where the fuck are you

death take me now: What.

death take me now: It's Tuesday.

sirpidgeot: its thursday Shiro

death take me now: death take me 

kogayass: lmao

queen allura: lmao

sirpidgeot: lmao

Hoes ( 11:46 AM )

razzledazzle: lmao

cinnamon roll: lmao

death take me now: I hate this family, I'm leaving.

sirpidgeot: that's my line

kogayass: abandoned yet again.

queen allura: Shiro how dare you leave us

razzledazzle: oHANA MEANS FAMILY

cinnamon roll: AND FAMILY MEANS NO ONE IS LEFT BEHIND

death take me now: Did you just quote lilo & stitch?

razzledazzle: IT IS A GREAT MOVIE SHUT UP

kogayass: did you know that lilo means lost and stitch means that it's stucked together, so lilo & stitch means lost & gets back together.

cinnamon roll: i

cinnamon roll: beautiful

sirpidgeot: why do you even know this

kogayass: why not?

sirpidgeot: touché

Hoes ( 06:03 PM )

cinnamon roll: so when are you guys coming?

kogayass: i'm already here Hunk, just feed me. leave them starved.

sirpidgeot: dont you dare to start it now, im not there yet

razzledazzle: well hurry up gremlin

sirpidgeot: this is why youre not my favorite friend Lance

queen allura: I'm going there at 7

queen allura: Actually no I'll be there in 30

sirpidgeot: at least i wont be the latest, shiro's not there yet

death take me now: Jokes on you, Pidge, I'm already here.

cinnamon roll: it's true, he's the first to arrive

sirpidgeot: well shit

Hoes ( 09:41 PM )

queen allura: thank you Hunk!!!

queen allura: It was delicious

kogayass: and thanks for the extra food.

kogayass: i won't have to cook for a week.

death take me now: More like I don't have to cook for you for a week.

death take me now: But really thanks Hunk it was better than great.

death take me now: It was like a religious moment.

cinnamon roll: oh you guys,,,

sirpidgeot: Lance is pouncing him for a hug

sirpidgeot: [ image ]

queen allura: cuteeee <3

cinnamon roll: but alas, no homo bro

razzledazzle: no homo

sirpidgeot: [ image ]

kogayass: that's gay.

kogayass: i would know, i am gay.

queen allura: I seconded that

queen allura: Trust me my uncle is gay

death take me now: That is not gay. That is bromance.

death take me now: I would know, I know Matt.

sirpidgeot: that reminds me

sirpidgeot: let's not add him here

kogayass: who??

queen allura: Matt?

sirpidgeot: shhh, he gets stronger everytime someone says his name

death take me now: Matt is not Voldemort, Pidge.

sirpidgeot: he could be

razzledazzle: i finally let go of Hunk to see what u guys talking about

razzledazzle: and im disappointed but not suprised

death take me now: Isn't that my line?

cinnamon roll: why are we talking about Matt?

sirpidgeot: because i am warning you guys not to add him in this holy groupchat

razzledazzle: oh honey, this gc isn't holy ever since Mullet is here

kogayass: for the last time it's not a mullet, Lance.

razzledazzle: sounds fake but ok

sirpidgeot: so that is our one and only rule

sirpidgeot: do not and i mean DO NOT

sirpidgeot: ADD MATT IN THIS GROUPCHAT

sirpidgeot: and i hope yall follow this

kogayass added mattheo latte into the chat

sirpidgeot: the aUDACITY

sirpidgeot: YOU HAVE ONE RULE KEITH

sirpidgeot: ONE

kogayass: i don't know what you think of me, Pidge. i never listen to the rules.

cinnamon roll: a Pidge Gunderson in its natural habitat

cinnamon roll: betrayal

mattheo latte: lmao succ

mattheo latte: also what the fuck is this shit

queen allura: jESUS CHRIST

death take me now: I guess Matt's dead

Chapter Text

Hoes (09:12 AM)

razzledazzle: looking back into our past convo,,,

razzledazzle: realizing something

razzledazzle: dID SHIRO JUST TYPE LMAO??

razzledazzle: am i riGHT OR AM I RIGHT

death take me now: Happens everytime there's a special occasion.

death take me now: AKA when there's a Matt Situation.

death take me now: Or when Keith is getting bullied.

kogayass: well fuck you too, Shiro.

mattheo latte: ;)

sirpidgeot: gay

mattheo latte: that's homophobic

sirpidgeot: im mattphobic actually

mattheo latte : >:0

cinnamon roll: why are you even looking back into our past convo

kogayass: yeah, stalkerish much?

razzledazzle: 1) fuck off keith

razzledazzle: 2) cuz im a bored bitch

razzledazzle: which reminds me, are we all not straight?

razzledazzle: like, are we all part of a LGBT+ ?

queen allura: I heard LGBT+ and I came here as fast as I can

queen allura: Also yeah duh

razzledazzle: bisexual and loud

queen allura: pansexual and proud

kogayass: didn't we all met at GSA??

sirpidgeot: no that's where i met you

sirpidgeot: we all met during the pride day

kogayass: well shouldn't that be obvious then??

razzledazzle: JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION MULLET

kogayass: fuck off, Lance.

kogayass: also im gay obviously.

kogayass: read the name.

razzledazzle: yes thank you for stating the obvious NEXT

cinnamon roll: man you know im pansexual

sirpidgeot: asexual my dudes

mattheo latte: wait so lemme get this straight,,,

razzledazzle: more like let me run this bi you

sirpidgeot: let's ace-cess the situation

cinnamon roll: let's pan this out!

kogayass: im gay

death take me now: ...

death take me now: Let's just queer out the situation.

mattheo latte: did u just

razzledazzle: ANYWAY

razzledazzle: matt, say it, out loud

mattheo latte: VAMPIRE

cinnamon roll: nice reference, not what we meant

mattheo latte: okay so

mattheo latte: im...

mattheo latte: im a....

kogayass: he's homoflexible.

mattheo latte: im a flaMING HOMOFLEXIBLE MAN

mattheo latte: GODDAMIT KEITH

mattheo latte: WHY

kogayass: you're taking too much time just to say it.

kogayass: so i said it for you.

kogayass: you're welcome :)

razzledazzle: am i the only one who got chills when i see keith's :) ?

sirpidgeot: nah i felt it

cinnamon roll: me too

queen allura: I'm beside him?? And I can actually feel the chills surrounding him??

queen allura: Keith how the fuck did you do that

kogayass: ???

kogayass: i have no idea what you're talking about.

mattheo latte: sure u dont,,,

mattheo latte: sure

mattheo latte: i will get to the bottom of this

mattheo latte: i will, mark my WORD

kogayass: yea sure whatever.

death take me now: I regret many things.

death take me now: This is one of them.

death take me now: Introducing Keith to all of you.

sunshine >>> my heart and soul

sunshine: Lance

my heart and soul: Hunk

sunshine: Lance

my heart and soul: okay ur serious

my heart and soul: waddup

sunshine: look,,,

sunshine: i know you and Keith had this "rivalry" going on

my heart and soul: theRE IS STOP USING QUOTATION MARK

sunshine: but can you please stop being a jerk to him??

sunshine: it's mean

sunshine: and uncalled for

my heart and soul: wat

my heart and soul: wAt

my heart and soul:  i am NOT being mean to him

sunshine: i have proofs

sunshine: dont tempt me Lance

sunshine: dont

my heart and soul: i

my heart and soul: holY SHIT I HAVE

my heart and soul: CODE 467

sunshine >>> pidgee

sunshine: pidGE

sunshine: CODE 467

sunshine: I REPEAT CODE 467

sunshine: THIS IS NOT A DRILL

sunshine: where the fricKLE FRACKLE ARE YOU???

sunshine >>> mattie yolk

sunshine: do you know where Pidge is?

sunshine: we're having a bro-problem here

sunshine: also why did you name yourself mattie yolk on my phone

mattie yolk: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

mattie yolk: she's with Keith

mattie yolk: better ask him

sunshine: k, thanks

sunshine >>> keef

sunshine: do you know where Pidge is?

keef: she's with me.

keef: why?

sunshine: call her to go back to dorm

sunshine: just say it's code 467

keef: ?? 

sunshine: just do it

keef: okay, she just ran

keef: what's code 467?

sunshine: sorry buddy

sunshine: can't tell you

sunshine: just something that us trio aka Lance, Pidge and I have to do

keef: why? is Lance ok?

sunshine: ...

sunshine: why are you only asking about him

keef: because?? i saw Pidge and you're texting me??

keef: that leaves Lance.

keef: so this is about Lance, right?

keef: wait, why did you ask why i'm asking about him?

sunshine: ahhh

sunshine: nevermind

Voltron (03:33 AM)

sirpidgeot: so remember our chat about LGBT shit and stuff?

sirpidgeot: i spy someone who didnt say anything about his sexuality

sirpidgeot changed Hoes to does shiro is gay?

sirpidgeot: i shall wait for your answer Shiro

mattheo latte: lmao what the fuck pidgeotto

sirpidgeot: fuck off mattington

mattheo latte changed sirpidgeot's name to pidgeotto

pidgeotto changed pidgeotto's name to sire pidgeot

sire pidgeot: what the fuck this app didn't let me to change my name back to the old one??

mattheo latte: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

does shiro is gay? ( 08:51 AM )

razzledazzle: answer the question

cinnamon roll: answer it

queen allura: guys wanna bet on what his sexuality is?

queen allura: i bet $30 he's bi

death take me now: Allura?

death take me now: No hesitation, oh wow.

razzledazzle: $20 he's gay

cinnamon roll: $25 he's ace

cinnamon roll: anyone else?

kogayass: not joining.

razzledazzle: why, you scared?

kogayass: no.

kogayass: it would be unfair if join.

kogayass: considering i know the answer.

razzledazzle: gonna give us a clue, Keith?

sire pidgeot: normal Lance: Mullet, a Lance that wants something: Keith

sire pidgeot: know the difference, kids

kogayass: haha no.

kogayass: i wanna watch all yall fail.

sire pidgeot: keith,,,

sire pidgeot: i love you but we dont need your texan bullcrap here

sire pidgeot: also $30 he's actually straight

mattheo latte: $19.80 he's bi too

cinnamon roll: why the .80??

mattheo latte: look,,,

mattheo latte: it's the only money i have left okay???

razzledazzle: so... shiro which are you??

death take me now: ugh

death take me now: I'm gay.

death take me now: Demisexual gay more specifically.

razzledazzle: alRIGHT RAZZLE DAZZLE

razzledazzle: ill be waiting for your money everyone ;))))

sire pidgeot: what

sire pidgeot: the

sire pidgeot: fuck

cinnamon roll: gdi i forgot his gaydar is pretty good

razzledazzle: excuse you?? my gaydar is ALWAYS good

queen allura: well goodbye $40

queen allura: you're in the hands of a weird guy now

razzledazzle: excuse you

mattheo latte: wait WHAT 

mattheo latte: but... my gaydar is good!

kogayass: the first time we met, you thought i was straight

kogayass: you finally figured im gay when you see me kissing a dude

kogayass: face it, your gaydar is broken

kogayass: like beyond repair

cinnamon roll: rude, but true

mattheo latte changed mattheo breaks' name to mattchiato

mattchiato changed kogayass' name to queefers

queefers: oh wow

queefers: how do you change names here help

razzledazzle: haha succ

death take me now: lmao

queefers: i hate yall

queen allura: No texan bullshit here

queefers: fuck off you brit.

queefers: drink your stupid tea.

queen allura: >:0

tide podge >>> the golden trio

tide podge: sooooo

tide podge: code 467? again?

tide podge: i thought weve talked abt this shit yesterday

hunkuna matata: yea he's not convinced

tide podge: why are we chatting?

tide podge: we could just?? talk??

tide podge: like the normal person we are??

LEGendary: lmao we're far from normal

hunkuna matata: he refuses to talk to us

hunkuna matata: and somehow these walls are?? soundproof??

hunkuna matata: this college dorm is weird

LEGendary: so i feel like a jerk

LEGendary: again

tide podge: yeah, you should be

hunkuna matata: dont worry dude

hunkuna matata: Keith doesnt mind

hunkuna matata: even tho you've been an awful jerk to him and always insult him

LEGendary: he STARTED IT

tide podge: he?? didnt??

LEGendary: ANYWAY

LEGendary: i WILL stop being a jerk to him

hunkuna matata: by apologizing?

tide podge: by acting like adults?

LEGendary: what

LEGendary: that's stupid

LEGendary: im just gonna ignore him forever, duh

tide podge: i

tide podge: for 2 yrs???

hunkuna matata: dude that's literally impossible

LEGendary: NOT WITH THAT ATTITUDE, ITS NOT

LEGendary: ill ignore him until he graduates

tide podge: how??

LEGendary: with determination

hunkuna matata: orrrr,,,

hunkuna matata: you could apologize?

hunkuna matata: to make it easier for all of us

LEGendary: thats stupid

tide podge: youre stupid

LEGendary: whAt????

tide podge: i said youre stupid

LEGendary: THATS STUPID

hunkuna matata: sigh

LEGendary: anyway it's official

LEGendary: im gonna ignore him

hunkuna matata: im worried

LEGendary: hunk,,,

LEGendary: hakuna matata

tide podge: hakuna my tities Lance

LEGendary: lmao wat tities

tide podge: >:0

Chapter Text

does shiro is gay? (12:13 PM)

cinnamon roll: soooo

cinnamon roll: this gc is fuckin dead

razzledazzle:  gasp

razzledazzle: hunK JUST SAYS FUCK

sire pidgeot: wAt

queen allura: Hunk I expect more from you

mattchiato: a ciNNamOn rOll???

mattchiato: i dont think so,,,

razzledazzle changed cinnamon roll's name to not innocent

death take me now: I'm not mad at you, Hunk.

death take me now: I'm just disappointed.

queefers: how do you change names????

not innocent: guys

not innocent: seriously

razzledazzle: im cereal, Hunk

razzledazzle changed razzledazzle's name to cereal

cereal: ;)

sire pidgeot: Lance,,,

sire pidgeot: stop mocha-ing him

sire pidgeot changed sire pidgeot's name to mocha

mocha: ;)

queen allura: Pidge, Lance, don't be mint to him

queen allura: ;)

not innocent: why are everyone making puns?????

death take me now: Hunk,

death take me now: This whole groupchat is a pun.

mattchiato: my name is a fucking pun

queefers: my name USED to be a pun.

queefers: if only someone could tell me how to change tHE FUCKING NAME.

does shiro is gay? (02:34 AM)

queefers: seriously guys?

queefers: i can see you motherfuckers reading this.

mocha: go to sleep, Keith

queefers: fuck off, gremlin.

mocha: excuse you, im a lake monster like my bae Nessie and Bessie

mattchiato:  nah,,,

mattchiato: ur definitely a gremlin

mocha: >:0

LEGendary >>> the golden trio

LEGendary: did u guys see what i did there?

hunkuna matata: see when you fall down from the stairs?

tide podge: see u falling up the stair?

LEGendary: wat

LEGendary: no wtf

LEGendary: do NOT BRING UP THOSE DARK DAYS

tide podge: it literally happened a few hours ago

LEGendary:  nOPE DONT REMEMBER DIDNT HAPPEN

tide podge: u really like to use that dont you

LEGendary:  yes

LEGendary: anyway we're getting off topic

LEGendary: i mean whEN I DIDNT EVEN MOCK KEITH

LEGendary: OR EVEN AKNOWLEGE HIM

tide podge: that is not how u spell acknowledge

LEGendary:  inconsequential

hunkuna matata: you could spell inconsequential, yet you cant even spell acknowledge??

LEGendary: again,,

LEGendary: inconsequential problems

LEGendary: so one week down,,,

hunkuna matata: and like many more months to go

hunkuna matata: i still think you should just go and apologize to him

tide podge: i seconded that 

LEGendary: offer is declined, blocked, and reported

LEGendary: do not talk to me or my son about that bullshit every again

hunkuna matata:  sigh

does shiro is gay? (03:54 AM)

death take me now: Can we please change the groupchat's name?

death take me now: It's been driving me mad since yesterday.

mocha changed does shiro is gay? to cha cha slide

death take me now: Better.

death take me now: also go to bed, Pidge.

cha cha slide (02:30 PM)

cereal:  DAD STRIKES AGAIN

not innocent:  WITH HIS DAD ADVICES

death take me now: Christ.

queen allura:  lmao

queen allura: Shiro's pain is my joy

mattchiato: same

death take me now: Then you must be happy all the time.

queefers: cAN ANYONE PLEASE TELL ME HOW TO CHANGE MY NAME??

mocha: suffer and die, Keith

mocha:  suffer and die

mocha: DIE

queefers: is this because i blue shell'd you in Mario Kart?

mocha:  suFFER AND DIE

death take me now: Something is missing.

queen allura: Suspicious

mattchiato: y'know this is probably the part where Lance will fight with Keith

cereal: haha Keith who?

queefers: um?? me??

death take me now:  sigh

death take me now: Where areth thou, death?

cha cha slide (10:23 AM)

cereal: ello mi dudes

cereal: ya boi is at the college's café

cereal: because this college is so fucking extra

cereal: anyway,,

cereal: anyone wants some coffee?

cereal: or something else?

queefers: can you buy me a latte?

cereal: whoops all of a sudden im no longer in the café, oh well

cereal: sorry Keith, maybe next time

queefers: ??

queefers: okay??

mocha:  sigh

LEGendary >>> the golden trio

LEGendary: 2 weeks strong guys!!!1!

hunkuna matata:  sigh

tide podge: sigh

kogayass >>> sharpshooter

kogayass: hey are you ok?

sharpshooter: yeah?? 

sharpshooter: why wouldn't i?

kogayass: nothing,,

kogayass: it's just...

kogayass: you've been acting weird lately.

kogayass: i've actually haven't been seeing you since like, last week?

sharpshooter: two weeks actually

kogayass: okay then, two weeks, that's one week more than i imagined.

kogayass: it's almost as if you're ignoring me.

kogayass: wait a minute.

kogayass: are you ignoring me????

sharpshooter: lmao 

kogayass: LANCE??

kogayass: have you been ignoring me??

sharpshooter:  lmao

kogayass: LANCE, ANSWER ME

kogayass:  i can see you reading this

kogayass:  LANCE

kogayass >>> the stars

kogayass: Lance is ignoring me, isn't he?

the stars: yep

kogayass: may i ask why?

the stars: he realized that he's been a jerk to u and instead of apologizing

the stars: like the adult he was supposed to be,,,

the stars: he ignored you so he wont say stupid things

kogayass: sigh

kogayass: i'll talk to him

the stars: please,,,

the stars: he's driving me insane

kogayass >>> sharpshooter

kogayass: Lance

kogayass: we are going to have a chat

kogayass: and if you're not answering this,

kogayass: i will climb to your fucking window and have this ridiculous chat face to face

kogayass: answer my call Lance.

sharpshooter: hokay okay!!

... calling sharpshooter

[call ended 3:18:43]

LEGendary >>> the golden trio

LEGendary: so me and Keith have taken care of our problems and issues

tide podge:  more like YOUR issue and problems

hunkuna matata: finally

hunkuna matata: so you've finally realize that apologizing is the best way?

tide podge: and that you should act like a fucking adults you are?

LEGendary:  fine,,,

LEGendary:  you guys were right, bla bla bla

LEGendary: but at least i could ignore him for two weeks!

LEGendary:  THATS DEDICATION RIGHT THERE

hunkuna matata: or just plain stubborn

tide podge: or stupid pride and ego blinding you

LEGendary: BUTTTTTT

tide podge: haha you say butt

LEGendary: like what i said Hunk,,,

LEGendary: hakuna matata

hunkuna matata:  sigh

Chapter Text

cha cha slide (03:24 AM)

cereal changed cereal's name to loverboy lance

loverboy lance: whaddup binches

not innocent: Lance

not innocent: you know i love you

loverboy lance: and i heart u too bby

not innocent: but you are really testing my patience

loverboy lance: ???

loverboy lance: i did nothing bad

loverboy lance: i am merely,,,,,,

mocha: cursing us with that awful song?

loverboy lance: moRE LIKE BLESSING U GUYS WITH QUEEN B

loverboy lance: smh guys

not innocent: get your beauty sleep Lance

loverboy lance: i dont need those ;)

loverboy lance: for i am beauty already

mocha: why u lyin bruh

loverboy lance: >:0

mattchiato: lmao burn

cha cha slide (09:42 AM)

queen allura: Wow smh guys Queen B is great

death take me now: I think she's too overrated.

mocha: seconded

loverboy lance: how dare

loverboy lance: the betrayal

not innocent: thirded

loverboy lance: HUNK?????

mattchiato: lmao top 10 anime betrayal

not innocent: after the 23rd time you wake me up from my sleep

not innocent: i dont think so buddy

loverboy lance: oh YEAH?!

loverboy lance: at least i still have Keith!

loverboy lance: right, buddy?

queefers: tell me how to change my name then maybe i will be.

loverboy lance: ...

loverboy lance: aT LEAST I HAVE ALLURA

queefers: wow.

queefers: you guys really like my name as queefers huh.

mattchiato: duh

loverboy lance: yup

mocha: totally

queen allura: Of course

not innocent: yeah dude

death take me now: :) YES

queefers: well shit.

mattchiato: like Beyoncé?

loverboy lance: gasp

queefers: i'll be honest, Beyoncé is like Starbucks,

queefers: known by many people, overrated and is actually just fine.

loverboy lance: now you listen here, you emo bitch

loverboy lance: [ video ]

mocha: ... ... ...

mocha: is that the fucking G-Note?

loverboy lance: yes

queen allura: Lance!

queen allura: You shouldn't attack him with that sad song!

not innocent: welp here comes the emo tears

mattchiato: hoW DARE YOU 

loverboy lance: wat

mattchiato: THAT'S IT

mattchiato: DON'T TALK TO ME OR MY SISTER EVER AGAIN

mocha: im he/him today

mattchiato: oh im sorry pidge

mocha: it's cool, i havent told u yet

mattchiato: DONT TALK TO ME OR MY BROTHER EVER AGAIN

loverboy lance: wAT???

not innocent: didnt see that coming

death take me now: I'm unadopting you.

queen allura: Is that even a word?

death take me now: How dare you bring up those days.

death take me now: G-Note is officially unallowed to be played from now on.

mattchiato: HERE HERE

loverboy lance: well shit im dadless

loverboy lance: anyone wanna be my daddy?

mocha: eat shit Lance

loverboy lance: :(

loverboy lance: all i want is to G-Note Keith

queefers: you played yourself, Lance.

queefers: i don't listen to MCR.

queefers: Ony P!ATD and FOB for me.

loverboy lance: wAT

loverboy lance: but?? ur emo??

queefers: i'm really not.

queefers: half of my clothes are hand-me-down from Shiro.

mocha: wait wHAT

queen allura: Okay I seriously did NOT see this coming

loverboy lance: SHIRO???

loverboy lance: UR CLOTHING STYLE IS SHIT

death take me now: I'm sorry that I'm too emo for you, Lance, but at least I'm not in denial of my emo phase.

not innocent: he got you there, buddy

loverboy lance: NOPE

queefers: here we go

loverboy lance: DONT REMEMBER DIDNT HAPPEN

mocha: i literally have pics of that phase Lance

queen allura: Why the quiznak you lyin'?

mattchiato: it's ok Lance, i had an emo phase too and look at me now!

loverboy lance: a weeb?

mattchiato: nO

mattchiato: A MEMELORD DUH!!!

mattchiato:  WHY WOULD I BE A WEEB????

death take me now: Ignore Matt, Lance, he's ALSO still in denial of his anime phase.

mattchiato: i do not! have! an anime! phase!

queen allura: Matt,

queen allura: Just yesterday you Naruto runs through the hall.

mattchiato: Keith did that too!

not innocent: Keith is an anime protagonist, Matt

queefers: no i'm not.

not innocent: you have an anime backstory, your hair is styled like an anime boy character aka long but not long, your eyes are bigger than normal, you dress like one and you have a bike.

queefers: you got me there.

mocha: so the duo memelords are in denial of their phase, what's new?

death take me now: What's new is that you guys are going to have your test and none of you are studying.

loverboy lance: well ur not my dad anymore so hah!

death take me now: Lance.

loverboy lance: im sorry dad, forgive me, ive sinned

mattchiato: or also known to meant im sorry daddy ive been naughty

death take me now: Good news guys! Language is now banned.

mattchiato: but daddy

death take me now: Daddy is NOT my kink.

loverboy lance: kinkshaming is my kink ;)

not innocent: no

not innocent: no kinkshaming here

loverboy lance: awww

loverboy lance: boo you whore

not innocent: did you just call me a whore?

loverboy lance: if ure into it, sure ;)

mocha: ugh

mocha: stop talking

queen allura: Kinky ;)

mocha: aLLURA???

queen allura: My kink is kinkshaming too Lance UwU

loverboy lance: OwO

queefers: this groupchat is disgusting.

mocha: you and me both

mattchiato: as if u dont have a kink Keith ;)

queefers: i do.

mocha: wait wat

queefers: i just don't say it to my friends at the groupchat.

mocha: KEITH HAS A KINK??

mocha changed cha cha slide to keith is a kinky boi

queefers: i didn't even tell you my kinks, Pidge.

mocha: knowing you it's probably either very vanilla or very NOT

mocha: no in between

queefers: can we NOT talk about my kinks.

loverboy lance: u didnt deny it

death take me now: Can we please not talk about my little brother's preference situation in sex?

queen allura: YOU COULD JUST SAY KINK WE'RE NOT KIDS

mattchiato: oh sweetie, we still love u no matter what ur kink is

mattchiato: so i have bite kink

loverboy lance: same

queen allura: Ditto

not innocent: oh wow guys, can we not?

mocha: yeah can we not?

mocha: like, Matt is like a brother to me

mattchiato: i hate to scare you Pidge

mattchiato: but i AM ur brother

mocha: oh

mocha: i forgot lol

queen allura: You guys literally look alike??

queen allura: How could you forget?

mocha: cuz he sucks

mattchiato: oh i sure sucks a lot ;)

death take me now: Matt.

queefers: from Queen B to kinks.

queefers: how could we get so far?

loverboy lance: wiTH HORNINESS

queefers: bye

shirogone >>> lancey lance

shirogone: Keith, my main man

shirogone: so u know that Jesus knows what we want, He just wants u to say it to Him,

shirogone: does that mean He has begging kink?

shirogone: boi u better answer me

shirogone: u bitch ill sell u to satan for a fucking cornchip answer me

lancey lance: ... Shiro?

shirogone: oH SHIT

shirogone: fuckkkk

lancey lance: SHIRO????

shirogone: :)

shirogone: yeet

lancey lance: wAT THE FUCk

[ we are sorry to say but your number has been blocked ]

lancey lance:  HOW DARE U LEAVE ME HANGING

[ we are sorry to say but your number has been blocked ]

LEGendary >>> the golden trio

LEGendary: [ image ]

tide podge: Lance,,,

tide podge: how many times should i tell u

tide podge: NOT to photoshopped a conversation

LEGendary: iM NOt

hunkuna matata: oh my gosh Lance, havent you learn your lesson?

LEGendary: fOR THE LAST TIME IM NOT EDITING THIS

hunkuna matata: ... wait

hunkuna matata: youre tellin me

hunkuna matata: yoURE SERIOUS?

LEGendary: yES

tide podge: wAT

tide podge: we need an explanation

hunkuna matata: so???

hunkuna matata: let's just?? ask??

tide podge: but subtlely

LEGendary: in the gc?

tide podge: i said subtlely u buffoon

keith is a kinky boi (10:12 PM)

mocha changed mocha's name to green alien

green alien:  [ image ]

green alien: SHIRO EXPLAIN

loverboy lance: how subtle

not innocent: i agree HOW subtle i cant even

green alien: shut ur trap

green alien: sHIRO RISE AND EXPLAIN

death take me now has left the chat

green alien: are u fucking kiddin me???

green alien: MATT RISE

mattchiato: ...

queen allura: I'm with Matt

queen allura: Dont worry, he's just in shock

mattchiato: wHAT THE FUCK

mattchiato: aLL THIS TIME WE COULD BE SHITPOSTERS BUDDIES

mattchiato: OH TAKASHI TAKASHI

mattchiato: wHEREFORE ART THOU TAKASHI

queen allura: It's where art thou you uncultured swine

mattchiato: FUCK OFF

not innocent: hey why not ask Keith?

green alien: ... why would he know?

not innocent: well for one, the message was supposed to be sent to Keith 

loverboy lance:  gASP

loverboy lance: kEITH

loverboy lance: WHERE U AT

loverboy lance: KEITH KOGANE

loverboy lance: KEITH AKIRA KOGANE

green alien: whY ISNT HE ANSWERING???? WE NEED ANSWERS

loverboy lance: dont worry guys

loverboy lance: ya boi lance shall find that shit

queen allura: Hurry up!!

mattchiato: he's in our dorm last i check

loverboy lance: ON IT

mattie >>> shiwo

mattie: so

mattie: heard from a little birdie you meme

mattie: and shitpost

mattie: dID U JUST BLOCKED MY NUMBER?

[ we are sorry to say but your number has been blocked ]

mattie: sHIRO

[ we are sorry to say but your number has been blocked ]

keith is a kinky boi (10:23 PM)

queefers: why are you guys sending Lance in my dorm?

mattchiato: cOUGHCOUGH

queefers: ... i'm sorry, i mean me and Matt's dorm.

mattchiato: that's better

green alien: wHY IS SHIRO MEMEING

not innocent: wHY IS HE HIDING IT

mattchiato: wHY ISNT HE SHITPOSTING WITH ME

queefers: why can't you guys just ask him yourself?

queen allura: He blocked us

queefers: ... all of you?

not innocent: even me :'(

queefers: ... he sure got dedication to keep it a secret.

queefers: okay so 

mattchiato: i KNEW IT

green alien: he??? hasnt said??? anything???

mattchiato: lmao i was typing it to send it AFTER he explain

mattchiato: but i got too excited so when i see the him send a text i immediately press send 

loverboy lance: well calm ur shit we want answers

queefers: okay chill.

queefers: Shiro's a hypocrite bitch.

queefers: he called you both as a person in denial

queefers: (which is true so stop denying it)

queefers: but he is also in a meme phase that he's very not proud of.

queefers: he usually just vent it to me but i guess he send it to the wrong person

queefers: aka Lance.

mattchiato: ok first: i do not hAVE AN ANIME PHASE

green alien: U DO SO SUCK IT UP BITCH 

green alien: UVE SUCKED DICKS SO SUCKING UP UR PHASE ISNT A BIG PROBLEM

mattchiato: but i

green alien: NO

queen allura: Well that makes sense

queen allura: In a way

queen allura: I mean, he DID make puns with me

queen allura: So I'm not really suprised

loverboy lance: wELL IM SHOOKED

loverboy lance changed queefers name to shookeith

shookeith: OF COURSE when my name's changed it's a pun

shookeith: again.

loverboy lance: shut up we know u love it

loverboy lance: also

loverboy lance: wAT THE FUCK SHIRO

loverboy lance: u HYPOCRITE BITCHHH

shookeith added death take me now into the chat

death take me now: betrayal

shookeith: shouldn't have taken my ice cream.

loverboy lance: so since we know ur tru color does that mean we could meme?

death take me now: No.

not innocent: I'm not mad, Shiro.

not innocent: I'm just disappointed.

loverboy lance: OOOHHHH

green alien: serVES YOU RIGHT

green alien: HOW DARE U KEEP SUCH INFORMATION FROM US

queen allura: In which Shiro got burn by his own words

mattchiato: NOW WE CAN BE SHITPOSTER BUDDIES

shookeith: lmao

death take me now: I hate you guys.

shookeith: hate you too.

mattchiato: <3

not innocent: i shall live up to my name :)

green alien: bUT DAD

loverboy lance: unadopted TWICE

shookeith: not suprised there.

not innocent: dID KEITH JUST MAKE A JOKE???

queen allura: Today sure is full of suprises

green alien: broganes exposed lmfao

death take me now: Goodbye.

sunshine >>> my heart and soul

sunshine: bro,,,

sunshine: youre staying at their dorm, right??

my heart and soul: yea??

my heart and soul: there's a fucking rainstorm outside???

my heart and soul: i dont want to fuckin die

sunshine: oh good

sunshine: i thought youre gonna brave the weather or smth

my heart and soul: Hunk, me and Keith are buddies now

my heart and soul: dont worry about it, im gonna crash at their couch

sunshine: good :)

sunshine: im very happy u guys are great friends now

sunshine: and that you finally let go of that "rivalry" of yours

my heart and soul: tHERE WAS A RIVALRY SHUT UP

sunshine: stop being in denial Lance

Chapter Text

mattherine >>> pidgethew

mattherine: pidgey, my sweet younger sibling of mine

mattherine: my fave sibling

mattherine: i know ur fucking awake, answer me u lil shit

pidgethew: what in tarnation

mattherine: stop being Keith

pidgethew: fuck off

pidgethew: and answer the fucking question, Mattherine

mattherine: ok ok so

mattherine: so

mattherine: so

pidgethew: jfc Matt i dont hv time for this shit

pidgethew: tell me or im blocking u

mattherine: alyt geeze

mattherine: am i really a weeb?

pidgethew: i

pidgethew: u texted me

pidgethew:  at 2 AM

pidgethew: because you wanted to know if youre a weeb?????

mattherine: yes Pidge,,,

mattherine: so am i?

pidgethew: cant u ask someone else???

mattherine: i asked Keith but he kicked me out of his room :(

pidgethew: well shit

mattherine: so????

pidgethew: yes u are

pidgethew: ur a fucking weeb so suck it up buttercup

mattherine: but why????

pidgethew: sigh

pidgethew:  the signs of being addicted to anime and turns into a weeb

pidgethew: there

pidgethew: thats the fucking link

pidgethew: now check

mattherine: okey dokey

mattherine: holy cytoplasm

mattherine: i am a weeb!!!!

pidgethew: great! how much did u get?

mattherine: 25/25

mattherine:  [ image ]

pidgethew: okay i did not expect u to know all of it wow

mattherine:  oH MY GOD

mattherine:  PIDGE DO NOT TELL ANYONE ABOUT THIS

mattherine:  ANYONE

pidgethew: go

pidgethew: be gay

pidgethew: and leave me alone

mattherine: <3

keith is a kinky boi ( 11:45 AM )

green alien:  [ image ]

green alien: [ image ]

green alien: [ image ]

death take me now:  I KNEW IT.

mattchiato:  PIDGE

not innocent: top 10 anime betrayal

mattchiato:  never have a betrayal felt so raw

loverboy lance: well it's about time you find out

mattchiato: but i dont??? get it??

mattchiato: how did u guys find out?

death take me now: You sang 60 song of the opening and closing of Naruto.

death take me now: And you remember all the lyrics.

loverboy lance: you called me an uncultured swine because i forgot Hiro's number from Darling in the Franxx

shookeith: he's not wrong at the uncultured swine part.

loverboy lance: >:0

not innocent: you called Keith Inuyasha once

shookeith: you forced me to cosplay as Yuu for your Mika from Seraph of the End.

green alien: u were very excited to meet Coran but was disappointed bcuz he doesnt look like Conan Edogawa

mattchiato: ahh okay then

mattchiato: wheres our queen?

loverboy lance: u mean Queen B our beautiful Queen?

death take me now: Let's avoid this argument again.

queen allura: I, like the good girl I am

green alien: coughcough sure jan

queen allura: ignoring Pidge

queen allura: im omw to my test so wish me luck bois

green alien: /raises eyebrow/

queen allura: Pidge, I know youre a boy rn

green alien:  dangit

loverboy lance: good luck boo

queen allura: Thnks bby

not innocent: yea what he said, good luck 'Lura, i'll bring u cookies later

queen allura: UwU

queen allura: I stan one (1) man

loverboy lance: excuse me

queen allura: I know what I said

mattchiato: GOOD LUCK BOI

queen allura: <3

shookeith: you can do it.

death take me now: I'm sure you will pass it :)

queen allura: Thnks Keith, Dad!!

death take me now: sigh

keith is a kinky boi ( 06:12 PM )

loverboy lance: since our beautiful Allura pass her test with floating colors

green alien: its with flying colors u ignorant slut

loverboy lance: IN THIS HOUSE

loverboy lance: THERE WILL BE NO SHAMING IN EVERYTHING

loverboy lance: OTHER THAN KINKSHAMING

queen allura: I, for one, agree on that 100%

mattchiato: get to the point Lance,,,,

mattchiato: im fucking hungry

death take me now: Who is Hungry and why are you fucking them?

mattchiato: i

shookeith: who named their child Hungry?

green alien: the parents of the dude who's fucking Matt apparently

loverboy lance: u hv a bad taste in name, Matt

mattchiato: if i had a bad taste in name

mattchiato: which i dont so dont be a hater

mattchiato: u hv a bad taste too

loverboy lance: wat

mattchiato: wat

green alien: i mean u guys are similar in most taste

queen allura: GET TO THE POINT LANCE

loverboy lance: ok ok simmer down cherry bomb

loverboy lance changed queen allura's name to cherry bomb

loverboy lance: Hunk invited everyone to come and eat breakfast tomorrow

cherry bomb: But?? I'm the only one who pass the test??

loverboy lance: Hunk says everyone so it's everyone

green alien: what food

loverboy lance: not sure yet

loverboy lance: he says he will make ice creams thats for sure

shookeith: well count me in

death take me now: Keith

shookeith: Shiro

death take me now:  Akira

shookeith: Takashi

green alien: ?? why are they saying Japanese names??

loverboy lance: drama DUM DUM DUMMM

death take me now: sigh

death take me now: Drink it at least ok?

shookeith: yeah yeah.

shookeith: so i'm in.

cherry bomb: This party starts by me so ofc I'm in

mattchiato: as seeing that im a shit cook, im in

green alien:  freeloader

mattchiato: takes one to know one

death take me now: I'll join too

death take me now: I miss ice cream

green alien: cant join

loverboy lance: wHAt

cherry bomb: Why????

green alien: im lactose intolerant

shookeith: huh me too.

death take me now: sigh

loverboy lance: KEITH?????

loverboy lance: nope ure not eating the ice cream

mattchiato: then can i hv his?

cherry bomb: Obviously it goes to the one who pass the test

cherry bomb: AKA me

shookeith: when you all find out Pidge is lactose intolerant you all ask why,

shookeith: when you all find out I'm lactose intolerant you all wanted my ice cream.

death take me now: So can I take it?

shookeith: um no.

shookeith: u promised me ice cream so i'm getting it.

loverboy lance: no u dont

shookeith: yes.

loverboy lance: no

shookeith: yes

loverboy lance: no

not innocent: BEFORE A FIGHT STARTS AGAIN

not innocent: i'll make waffles ok???

not innocent: you like waffles, dont you, Keith?

shookeith: more than life itself.

not innocent: THEN IT SETTLED!

not innocent: TOMORROW MORNING

not innocent: aka tuesday

not innocent: WE'LL EAT AT OUR DORM

green alien: but

not innocent: but nothing

shookeith: but i still want ice cream.

not innocent: you'll get some if you drink your pills

mattchiato: damn ur such a mom fren

loverboy lance changed not innocent's name to mom friend

mom friend: well shit i heart you guys too

loverboy lance: we love u too mommy uwu

death take me now: Mommy?

cherry bomb: Kinky

mom friend:  no

cherry bomb: :(

green alien: does that mean Hunk and Shiro are married?

death take me now: No.

mom friend: no offense Shiro but no

death take me now: None taken.

green alien: /raises eyebrow/ suspicious

shookeith: why are you guys like this.

loverboy lance: u love us UwU

shookeith: sigh

mattchiato: we love u too Keith UwU

shookeith: stop that.

cherry bomb: ?? The love?

shookeith: no the uwu thing.

mattchiato changed keith is a kinky boi to UWU

shookeith: i hate all yall motherfuckers.

death take me now: <3

mattherine >>> pidgethew

mattherine: can i crash today?

pidgethew: why

matherine: Keith locked me out of the dorm :(

pidgethew: wait

tide podge >>> the golden trio

tide podge: [ image ]

tide podge: should i let him in?

hunkuna matata: Pidge, we're literally one room away

tide podge: then why did we create this gc in the first place huh?

LEGendary: he got you there bruh

LEGendary: bring 7 instant noodle and it's a deal

hunkuna matata: why 7?

LEGendary: 2 for each of us and 1 for him

tide podge: lmao alyt

pudge >>> mutt

pudge: bring us 4 instant noodles then it's a yes

mutt: on it

Chapter Text

UWU ( 09:23 AM )

cherry bomb: First of all, thank you for the food, Hunk

cherry bomb: It was delicious and I want more

loverboy lance: well he's mine so fuck off u british

green alien: ehem

loverboy lance: ***ours

green alien: continue on

mattchiato: marry me Hunk

mattchiato: together we're unstoppable

loverboy lance: i sAID HE IS OURS THANK YOU

shookeith: i get why he's your favorite, Allura.

shookeith: he's a god.

mom friend: awww you guys are just overreacting

death take me now: Your cooking cured my depression.

loverboy lance: OMGEEE

shookeith: am i the only one reading Lance's scream as one of the dumb blonde popular girl squeal?

green alien: nah fam

green alien: me too

mattchiato: dO NOT MOKE MY SON HE IS PRECIOUS

green alien: moke

cherry bomb: moke

shookeith: moke

loverboy lance: moke

mattchiato:  TRAITOR

mattchiato: i was saving ur ass and this is what i get

mom friend: lol what ass

shookeith: Lance's fucking flat.

loverboy lance:  HUnK????

mattchiato: serves u right bitch

loverboy lance: aNYWAY IGNORING HUNK'S BETRAYAL

cherry bomb: How dare you ignore Hunk, he did nothing wrong

loverboy lance: fuck off u brit

loverboy lance:  HUNK'S COOKING MAKES SHIRO MEME!!!

green alien: wait wat

green alien: HWAT

green alien:  HE MEMES

mattchiato: SHIRO, MY SHITPOSTER BRO

death take me now: This is why I never meme here.

kogayne >>> takashit

kogayne: it's Matt

takashit: What did he do this time?

kogayne: wha

kogayne: i mean it's me, Matt

kogayne: ya boi

takashit: What did you do this time?

kogayne: IT'S NOT ME THIS TIME OK

kogayne: Keith's puking at the dorm

kogayne: help

kogayne: he puked at my shirt ;-;

takashit: I'm on it.

UWU ( 03:43 PM )

death take me now: Okay who gives Keith the ice cream.

green alien: where's the question mark, dad?

death take me now: It's not a question.

death take me now: It's a statement.

death take me now: Now confess, who did it.

mom friend: is he okay???

mattchiato: aside from puking and headache, yeah he is.

loverboy lance: HWAT

loverboy lance: HE TOLD ME HE DRANK HIS MEDS

death take me now: Lance.

death take me now: You're going to take care of him.

death take me now: And wash his puke.

death take me now: That's your punishment.

loverboy lance: but he

loverboy lance:  i didnt even

death take me now:  Lance.

loverboy lance: yes dad

mattchiato: ok, tell me when you're here dude

loverboy lance: yea yea

mom friend: im gonna cook for him

loverboy lance: wat bout me homie?

mom friend: haha suffer your punishent

loverboy lance: :'0

mom friend: lol jk, i'll cook some for u too

loverboy lance: <3

loverboy lance: wait wat about my class?

loverboy lance: and Keith's??

green alien: dw Lance, i'll copy the notes for you

mattchiato: i'll ask one of his friend for the notes.

loverboy lance: thanks man

green alien: ey

loverboy lance: thanks dude

green alien: good enough

cherry bomb: I love our family :')

lans >>> mattdew

lans: oh rapunzel,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

lans: let down your hair

mattdew: elsa makes more sense dude

lans: just open the goddamn door

mattdew: cLOSING THE GODDAMN DOOR NO

lans: get dat shit away from me

mattdew:  IT'S MUCH BETTER TO FACE THIS KIND OF THINGS

mattdew: AHA I HEARD U MUMBLING BITCH

lans: fUCK

mattdew: i knEW IT BLACKMAIL MATERIAL

lans: fuCK YOU

UWU ( 05:32 PM )

death take me now: Lance, update.

death take me now: Lance?

cherry bomb: He's dead

death take me now:  Lance???

death take me now: Where is he?

green alien: he's not at class, Shiro

mom friend: not at our dorm too

death take me now: Okay, that's it, I'll go and check.

mattchiato:  OH MY GODD

death take me now: ?

mattchiato: im at me and Keith's dorm 

cherry bomb: What's wrong??

green alien: ure scaring Shiro lol

mom friend: YOU'RE SCARING ME TOO TELL US

mattchiato:  [ image ]

cherry bomb: HWAT

cherry bomb: This is so fucking cute I'm sCREENSHOTING

death take me now: Oh thank god.

green alien: thats gay over there

mom friend: i,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

mom friend:  UWU SO SOFT AHHH

mom friend: SCREENSHOT

green alien: same

green alien: but for blackmailing purpose ofc

death take me now: Sounds fake but okay.

mom friend:  DAD STRIKES AGAIN

green alien: fuck u

UWU ( 11:23 AM )

shookeith: wE HAD A BONDING MOMENT

shookeith:  YOU CRADLED ME IN YOUR ARMS

loverboy lance: nOPE

loverboy lance: dont remember

loverboy lance:  diDNT HAPPEN

mom friend: what are u guys fighting about again???

shookeith: wE HAD A BONDING MOMENT

loverboy lance: it diDNT HAPPEN

green alien: u know shit's real when Keith didnt use any full stop to end his sentence

cherry bomb: what are you guys EVEN fighting about?

shookeith: we're not fighting.

shookeith: we're having creative discussion.

loverboy lance: FIGHTING

shookeith: CREATIVE DISCUSSION

loverboy lance: FIGHTING

shookeith: CREATIVE DISCUSSION

loverboy lance:  FIGHTING

shookeith:  CREATIVE DISCUSSION

death take me now: I can't believe you guys are fighting about whether you're having a fight or a creative discussion.

mattchiato: ok so since i saw this all happen LIVE

mattchiato: i shall tell u lot

green alien: just say it

mattchiato: Keith and Lance fell asleep 

mattchiato: with Lance's arm draped on his body yes?

green alien: yes yes we see the picture just continue

death take me now: patience yields focus, Pidge.

mattchiato: yea listen to dad 

death take me now: Matt.

mattchiato: whoops sorry dad

death take me now: Just continue.

mattchiato: ok so

mattchiato: apparently they talk abt some deep shit??

mattchiato: but the next day Lance doesnt remember so

cherry bomb: That's rather uneventful

cherry bomb: Where is Keith anyway?

mom friend: banging Lance's door

cherry bomb: Well tell him to go to the cafe

cherry bomb: Or he wont get his coffee

mom friend: update Keith just runs out the dorm without saying goodbye or sorry

green alien: rude

mattchiato: i want coffee too

death take me now: Me too.

cherry bomb: Well get your arses here

green alien: lol arses

hunkuna matata >>> the golden trio

hunkuna matata: u remember it didnt u

hunkuna matata: notice how i didnt use a question mark

LEGendary: ... yea

tide podge: dude why u lyin there

LEGendary: im not emotionally ready for that

hunkuna matata: what? bonding?

LEGendary: YES

LEGendary: like ive just been frens with him for awhile???

tide podge: actually uve been friends with him since we're freshmans but youre blinded with your "rivalry"

LEGendary:  stoP USING QUOTATION MARK, THERE IS ONE YOU GREMLIN

LEGendary: but i just really being friends with him this few weeks and

LEGendary: we're talking about stuff???

LEGendary: whatever im not emotionally ready for this.

green alien: iM nOt eMoTiOnaLLy rEaDY fOR tHiS

hunkuna matata: ... i dont get why but i support u bro

LEGendary: bro <3 

LEGendary: true friendship, be like him Pidge

green alien: no one can be like Hunk

LEGendary: shit u rite

arulla >>> kissu

arulla: You doing okay?

kissu: yes.

arulla: I know that you feel rejected, Keith

kissu: ...

arulla: Look, I have no idea what's inside Lance's head but I know he means well

arulla: Maybe he's not ready to face the fact that you guys are really friends now

arulla: Lance always runs from his problems and create bigger one to ignore it

kissu: ... how do you know him so well?

arulla: He's my?? Cousin??

kissu: wait wat

arulla: wat

arulla: Want me to go to your dorm? We can watch Netflix

kissu: sure, Matt wants to join too though.

arulla: The more the merrier

kissu: thnks 'Lur

arulla: Np 'Kira

arulla: Also open your door, I'm outside 

Chapter Text

UWU ( 02:12 PM )

 
cherry bomb: After 1 whole week of tests

 
cherry bomb: We are finally free, people
 

loverboy lance: preach

 
mattchiato: amen brother

 
death take me now: It was fun while it lasted.

 
death take me now: I truly enjoy your sufferings and screaming.

 
shookeith: yea well you're checking the papers now so,
 

mom friend: it's October guys!!!

 
mom friend: you know what that means

 
green alien changed UWU to haloweed 
 

mom friend: eh good enough 
 

cherry bomb: LET'S DRESS FOR HALOWEEN

 
loverboy lance: YES

 
loverboy lance: let's do it

 
death take me now: And that's my sign to leave the conversation.

 
mattchiato: SHIRO WAIT

 
mattchiato: SHIROOOO

 
mattchiato: dont u leave me, bae

 
shookeith: fuck no.
 

shookeith: i've had enough of that last two years with Matt.

 
green alien: bUT CRYPTIDS

 
shookeith: i'm sorry but no.

 
loverboy lance: anyoNE WHO JOINS WILL GET COOKIES FROM HUNK

 
mom friend: wait wat

loverboy lance: drasastic calls always leads to drasastic measures, Hunk

mom friend: that is not how the phrase goes

 
death take me now: Turns out my schedule is free.

 
death take me now: Well whaddya know.

 
death take me now: Guess I'll be joining you guys :)

 
mattchiato: bitch

 
green alien: k-keef senpai? 

 
green alien: w-will you join us UwU ?

 
shookeith: no.

 
green alien: ÒwÓ nani???

 
shookeith: no.

 
loverboy lance: wHAT DID U SAY U PUNK

 
shookeith: i said no, shitbag.

 
loverboy lance: THIS JUST IN, FOLKS, A HOMOSEXUAL MAN WITH INITIAL KAK HAS TURNED DOWN AN OFFER
 

loverboy lance: aN OFFER THAT IS HUNK'S COOKING, YES, THAT BLESSING 

 
loverboy lance: "IS HE A WEIRDO?" HE SURE IS JARED

 
green alien: wow
 

green alien: turning down Hunk's food

 
green alien: such an ignorant slut

 
mattchiato: IN THIS HOUSE

 
mattchiato: THERE WILL BE NO SLUT SHAMING OR ANY KIND OF SHAMING EXCEPT FOR KINKSHAMING CUZ SOME PPL LIKE THAT

 
death take me now: Is Haloween last two year with Matt that bad?

 
green alien: lol that rhymed
 

shookeith: it's the worst.
 

shookeith: very very very VERY BAD.

 
loverboy lance: drama queen

 
shookeith: attention whore.

 
loverboy lance: gASP
 

loverboy lance: the audacity

 
green alien: oH HOW THE TURN TABLES
 

shookeith: cry me a table, Lance.

 
death take me now: It's cry me a river, Keith.

 
shookeith: why would i need a river?

 
shookeith: at least i can use a table.

 
mattchiato: dudE I SAID I WAS SORRY
 

shookeith: well sorry doesn't sweeten my coffee does it Mattheo?

 
cherry bomb: Ok! So I've found the perfect costume for all of us!

 
cherry bomb: so so perfect
 

green alien: please be a good one please be a good one please

 
mom friend: which is ... ?

 
cherry bomb: VOLTRON

 
green alien: tHANK GOSHDARN

 
cherry bomb: yes!

 
cherry bomb: Pretty neat cause it covers most of your personalities :))))

 
cherry bomb: The leader guy, the black paladin, is Shiro just because

 
death take me now: What's a black paladin?
 

cherry bomb: Hunk is the yellow paladin because he is loved and a literal sunshine

 
loverboy lance: yEs

 
loverboy lance changed mom friend's name to literal sunshine
 

literal sunshine: aww you guys im blushing

 
mattchiato: ur beautiful even when u blush babe

 
loverboy lance: for the last time Matt, u cant take Hunk
 

mattchiato: awwww worth a shot

 
cherry bomb: Anyway,,,

 
cherry bomb: The green one is Pidge cuz she's smart as hell

 
shookeith: and short.
 

green alien: fight me bitch

 
shookeith: what was that? i can't hear you, you're too far down there.
 

green alien: FIGHT MEH

 
cherry bomb: And since in the story the green paladin's sibling is a rebel, Matt is the rebel 
 

death take me now: Matt alone is a rebel.

 
mattchiato: uwu yEA BOi

 
cherry bomb: I will be the princess because I said so

 
cherry bomb: Lance will be the blue paladin because he's a flirty bisexual disaster
 

loverboy lance: im noT A DISASTER EXCUSE ME

 
loverboy lance: i aM A GREAT GUY

 
loverboy lance: MAMA AINT RAISE NO DISASTER

 
shookeith: but she sure raise a drama queen.

 
loverboy lance: FUCK OFF

 
cherry bomb: And Keith will be the red paladin because he's hotheaded!

 
cherry bomb: Are we clear????

 
literal sunshine: one (1) problem
 

cherry bomb: What

 
death take me now: Keith refuses to join the group costume.

 
loverboy lance: cause he's a scaredy cat
 

shookeith: you would be if you know what happened last two years.
 

mattchiato: JESUS FUCKING CHRIST KEITH
 

mattchiato: LET IT GO
 

shookeith: [ image ]

 
mattchiato: now that was just uncalled for
 

green alien: ok what really happen last two years ago???

 
green alien: and why is Keith so traumatized about it??

 
shookeith: we do not talk about that dark times.
 

mattchiato: it was not that bad 

 
shookeith: bitch.

 
death take me now: Settle down, kids.
 

death take me now: Just tell us the story.

 
shookeith: fuck off, Shiro.

 
death take me now: You called me dad and I shall be dad.

 
death take me now: Now tell us.

 
mattchiato: well u see daddy,,,

 
death take me now: First of all, no.
 

death take me now: Second of all, I was talking to Keith.
 

mattchiato: :0

 
loverboy lance: just?? tell us???
 

shookeith: the offer is rudely declined.
 

shookeith: it was the most horrific thing i have ever seen in my whole life.
 

shookeith: just know that it's bad.

 
shookeith: very bad.

 
cherry bomb: I dont know what happen last two years with you bitches,
 

cherry bomb: And I dont fucking care

 
cherry bomb: But I know what will change ur mind Keith

 
shookeith: oh really?

 
cherry bomb: Well,,,
 

cherry bomb: The red paladin wields a sword,,,

 
cherry bomb: And maybe I get too excited and buy all of the costumes already

 
cherry bomb: It sure would be a shame if I were to

 
cherry bomb: Oh, I dont know,
 

cherry bomb: Throw it away

 
shookeith: wait no.

 
shookeith: i'll join.

 
green alien: oh so now u join

 
shookeith: she says the red paladin wields a sword, Pidge.
 

shookeith: swords.

 
loverboy lance: what's so great about swords??

 
death take me now: Lance.

 
death take me now: Keith's graduation quote is "while you were being heterosexual I studied the blade".

 
mattchiato: ayyyyy tru

 
shookeith: i'm not even sorry about that.

green alien: why

shookeith: im gay and i love swords fuck off.

literal sunshine: so it's official guys??

 
cherry bomb: Yes

 
cherry bomb: And dont u dare to say no

 
literal sunshine: well alrighty then

 
UWU ( 11:43 AM )

 
 
death take me now: Do I need to know why Lance, Pidge and Hunk are suspended for three days?
 

death take me now: Actually I want to know.

 
death take me now: I expect more from you, Hunk.

 
literal sunshine: u shouldnt have, Shiro
 

loverboy lance: for the record, it was Pidge's idea

 
green alien: Lance supplies the stuff
 

mattchiato: and Hunk??

 
loverboy lance: he's the one who mixes it all

 
mattchiato: not suprised and totally NOT disappointed
 

mattchiato: great job yall

 
death take me now: Matt, don't encourage them.

 
cherry bomb: So

 
cherry bomb: You guys finally got suspended?

 
cherry bomb: Nice, I'm proud to call you my friends
 

death take me now: Allura, no.

 
cherry bomb: Allura, yes

 
shookeith: why tho?

 
shookeith: like what happen when you mixed it all? 

 
shookeith: and why did you even do that in the first place?

 
literal sunshine: why not?
 

loverboy lance: it explodes and burns the lab's table

loverboy lance: and our lab coats too lol
 

green alien: because we CAN AND WE WILL

 
green alien: we're not cowards like you

 
shookeith: you say that, yet this is the first time you guys get suspended
 

loverboy lance: shit u rite

 
loverboy lance: quick Hunk, give a snarky but smart comment

 
literal sunshine: this is the first time because we're secretive like a spy

 
shookeith: ...

 
shookeith: well played

 
mattchiato: wat did you guys even use??

 
mattchiato: like how does it get on fire???
 

green alien: we use this element called AH

 
loverboy lance: aka the element of suprise ;)

literal sunshine: we close our eyes and just mixes everything lol
 

death take me now: I should've seen this coming miles away.
 

literal sunshine: at least it's only four days

loverboy lance: freE TIME AYYYY

 
haloweed ( 01:18 PM )

 
 
green alien: cant believe im saying this but

 
green alien: i miss school ajajjajsxa
 

mattchiato: wow cant relate
 

loverboy lance: where are the others??

 
loverboy lance: let's hang out at the cafe like weirdos
 

literal sunshine: joining
 

literal sunshine: at least now im not stuck in the dorm

 
green alien: me too
 

mattchiato: as someone who uses his name as a pun of coffee

mattchiato: I SHALL JOIN

 
mattchiato: Keith is at his class, Allura is at hers and Shiro is grading the exam papers
 

mattchiato: so YES IM JOINING

 
shookeith: me too, wait for me Matt.

 
literal sunshine: shouldnt you be in class?

 
shookeith: probably, i don't really care.

 
loverboy lance: eh

 
loverboy lance: the more the merrier

 
mattchiato: alyt we'll meet at the block
 
 

 
death take me now created a Groupchat

 
death take me now invited cherry bomb, loverboy lance, literal sunshine, mattchiato, green alien to the Groupchat
 

death take me now named the Groupchat: You know what this is about

 
 
You know what this is about ( 09:42 AM )
 
 

death take me now: Well?

death take me now: What have we got so far?

 
death take me now: Did he notice anything weird, Matt?

 
mattchiato: of course, of course, boss
 

mattchiato: i have made sure he doesnt notice any single thing about this

 
death take me now: Hunk, have you prepared yourself?

 
literal sunshine: im ready
 

literal sunshine: my kitchen is ready

 
death take me now: Pidge, the plannings?

 
green alien: i've created the plans and schedule to keep him occupied 

 
death take me now: Allura, supplies?

 
cherry bomb: I've bought everything we need
 

death take me now: Lance, the diversion and distractions?

 
loverboy lance: im sooo gonna be very annoying and nosy dont worry, i promise

 
death take me now: Good.
 

death take me now: I'm glad everyone is taking this seriously.

 
death take me now: Operation 1023 is a go.

 
death take me now: And makes sure he doesn't notice anything with everything you got.
 

Chapter Text

haloweed (10:12 PM)

loverboy lance: hey so

loverboy lance: i was thinking

shookeith: a dangerous event.

loverboy lance: hush child

loverboy lance: the adult is talking here

shookeith: i'm older than you.

loverboy lance: with your height? u might as well be a high schooler

shookeith: fight me, Lance.

shookeith: i fucking dare you.

loverboy lance: challenge fucking accepted

loverboy lance: meet me at Denny's parking lot, 2 AM

literal sunshine: guys please dont fight

literal sunshine: Keith, be the bigger person here

shookeith: excuse you,

shookeith: i'm 5'5" and bitter.

loverboy lance: holy shit u rlly are short lmao

shookeith:  FUCK YOU

shookeith: get ready to get your ass kicked.

loverboy lance: oh please,,,,

loverboy lance: if anything, it would be u who complains about ur sore ass

shookeith: wat.

mattchiato: /chokes/

green alien: the sexual tension is thick in the air

literal sunshine:  youfuckedup.jpg

loverboy lance: ??? 

loverboy lance: wat the hap is fuckening???

cherry bomb: Lance, sweetheart,,,,

cherry bomb: Re-read what you just typed

loverboy lance: ??? ok?

loverboy lance: /gASP/

loverboy lance: thAT WAS NOT WAT I MEANT

loverboy lance: i mEAN WHEN I KICK HIS ASS

green alien: that's some kinky shit u said there 

mattchiato: damn, Lance, u're an assman?

loverboy lance:  nOOOO THATS NOT WHAT I MEANT GODDAMN IT

loverboy lance: also yes i am lol

loverboy lance: i love me thicc globes

literal sunshine: not helping your case at all

death take me now: Lance.

loverboy lance:  oh no

green alien: the father has arrived

death take me now: Saw you talking about wrecking my little brother's ass.

loverboy lance:  SHIRO IT'S NOT WHAT U THINK

death take me now: I WON'T HESITATE BITCH.

death take me now: I do not approve.

loverboy lance:  see??

loverboy lance: it is impossible for me to fuck Keith

death take me now: You have to date him first.

loverboy lance: wait wat

literal sunshine: are we ignoring the fact Shiro and Lance just pulled a vine?

death take me now: And I need to talk about the shovel talk.

green alien: dont forget the sex talk

mattchiato: also the sock and door thing

literal sunshine: guys? are we ignoring it??

loverboy lance:  foR THE LAST TIME I AM NOT FUCKING KEITH

green alien: yet

loverboy lance: i juST WANT TO FIGHT HIM

shookeith: that's kinky, Lance.

loverboy lance:  yoU ARE NOT HELPING

literal sunshine: okay then, so we're ignoring it

death take me now: I don't care about what you guys do during foreplay, Lance.

loverboy lance:  seriOUSLY

loverboy lance: unfortunately, my good friends, my one and only true love remains myself

cherry bomb: At least you dont have to worry about rejection, Lance

loverboy lance: not necessarily

loverboy lance: i turn myself down occasionally, to keep things interesting ;)

literal sunshine: taking narcissism to the next level

death take me now: The point is, don't fight at the parking lot.

death take me now: It's just been a week back from your punishment.

green alien: psh more like freedom

mattchiato: those three days of your so called "freedom" are filled with you groaning and screaming

green alien:  listen,,,,,,

green alien: i can expLAIN

cherry bomb: No you cant

green alien: no i cant

death take me now: Guys.

death take me now: Please sleep.

mattchiato: ok son

death take me now: I'm older than you.

mattchiato: whoops sorry dad

death take me now: No.

haloweed (09:11 AM)

loverboy lance: wAIT I FORGOT TO TELL YOU GUYS

shookeith: about??

literal sunshine: you havent told them???

cherry bomb: Told us what?

literal sunshine: we're having a small party!

mattchiato: sOUNDS GAY IM IN

green alien: there is literally nothing gay about that sentence

mattchiato: noT YET LMAO

death take me now: He just woke up.

cherry bomb: On the scale from 1 to 10 how sleepy are you, Matt?

mattchiato: 420

literal sunshine: that's too high

mattchiato: you fucking know it

green alien: how did u know Matt just wakes up, Shiro?

death take me now: He crashes at my place yesterday

shookeith: i kicked him out again.

loverboy lance: why

shookeith: he was smoking weed in the living room.

loverboy lance: understandable have a nice day

loverboy lance: so anyone wanna join?

loverboy lance: it'll be just us dont worry

loverboy lance: looking at u Keith

shookeith: it's not my fault i hate people.

literal sunshine: but you haven't meet all of them, there are some nice people!

shookeith: i've met enough of them.

shookeith: what a bunch of bastards.

shookeith: looking at you, Lance.

loverboy lance: fuck u

green alien: actually we're inviting one more person,,,,

shookeith: ... name?

green alien: Shay?

shookeith: ok i'm joining.

literal sunshine: really?

shookeith: ? yea? 

shookeith: she is nice.

cherry bomb: Me too! I miss her!

mattchiato: ayy we're meeting who?

death take me now: I'll join for the free food and meeting Shay again.

literal sunshine: How did you guys even know her?

shookeith: same class.

cherry bomb: My father introduced her to me.

death take me now: I teach her class.

mattchiato: i have no frickle idea who ur talking abt but im still joining

loverboy lance: great!

loverboy lance: so it settled then?

cherry bomb: Ohohoho, no.

cherry bomb: The question is: why are you inviting her? ',:)

shookeith: i swear to god if yo're inviting that angel just to flirt with her, Lance ...

loverboy lance: iM NOT, JESUS, CALM UR ASS

loverboy lance: well not rlly like that

cherry bomb: Keith, bring my wooden katana

cherry bomb: Lance needs to be punished

mattchiato: kinky shit mmmMmMMM

shookeith: on it.

loverboy lance:  iTS NOT LIKE THAT

death take me now: Guys, stop, let Lance explains.

loverboy lance: thank you

death take me now: Then you could kick his ass.

loverboy lance: ouch, harsh

green alien: we invited her cuz Hunk has a crush on her lol

literal sunshine:  PIDGE

literal sunshine:  where the frickle frackle is the subtlety you promised me

green alien: gone with Lance's dignity yesterday

loverboy lance: HEY

shookeith: i approve, Hunk marry her now.

cherry bomb: Agreed, you guys would make a great couple :)

death take me now: What they both says.

mattchiato: still have no idea who u talkin abt 

literal sunshine: aww thanks guys, but she doesnt like me like that

green alien: /looks into the camera like The Office/

literal sunshine: ?

loverboy lance: Hunk is so oblivious that he doesnt see tht his crush likes him too

literal sunshine: she doesnt!

green alien: just yesterday she said that you're a boyfriend material!

literal sunshine: yeah, as a fren!!!

cherry bomb: Woah okay.

shookeith: he really is oblivious

death take me now: Hunk is the most oblivious person i know.

mattchiato: sure jan 

death take me now: ?

mattchiato: nothing

literal sunshine:  ANYWAY

literal sunshine: it'll be at 6 and im cooking 

mattchiato: aight mate

>>>

Hunk is nervous.

Pidge could tell with how much food he had cook ( "Hunk, we don't need this much," "But what if we run out of food?" ), his pacing ( "Stop it, Hunk, you'll burn the carpet with how much you're pacing" "Well shit, Lance, my crush is about to come here and it has to be perfect!" ), and also the fact that he's sweating and is groaning on the couch.

Their living room is huge, with a big, long and not to mention comfy couch that could fit at least four people, three bean bags; each with different colors - blue, green and yellow - which could fit 2 people and a very  clean floor ( "It's not clean enough!" "HUNK!" ) that is covered with a navy blue carpet. The carpet is filled with lots of video games and movie discs neatly stacked next to each other. The foods are at the kitchen, ready to be eaten, while the trio are sitting at the couch, Hunk in the middle with Lance leaning on his left side, his head on Hunk's shoulder, probably playing with his phone. Pidge is on his right side, putting both of her hands behind her head, legs dangling at the edge of the couch, all the while trying to calm Hunk down.

"But what if Shay gets in the wrong dorm?"

"Shay knows exactly where our dorm is, Hunk,"

"What if she forgets?" Hunk is panicking again.

"Then she could text us for the dorm number," she replied easily.

Hunk counted the seats and let out a horrified gasp, "What if the seats are not enough?" 

Pidge is too tired for this shit. "Then some of us will sit on the floor," Really the only reason she's doing this is because she loves Hunk too much.

"What if the popcorns aren't enough?" Hunk questioned again.

"Hunk," she started, "you've make ten bowls full of popcorns," at Hunk's panicked stare she continued, "Hunk, there are only seven of us,"

"Hunkadory, sweetie, my stars and everything," Lance turns his body, facing them, smile in reassurance, "it'll be fine!" 

Hunk looks unconvinced.

"Look," Lance wraps his arm over Hunk's shoulder, "you've prepared everything! Food," his other hand points towards the kitchen, "Entertainment," pointing to the stacked things on the floor, "And everything!" he smiles.

Suprisingly, Hunk looks calmer now, and he lets out a laugh, "Okay, you're right,"

"Now," Lance smirks, "let's pick the best blanket and hog it before the others came,"

Three things happen right then.

One, Hunk stands up so quickly that Lance falls out of the couch with a "Hey!" as Hunk runs to somewhere, screaming, "I forgot the blankets!", leaving dust at their wake. Lance and Pidge stared at each other before looking at where Hunk went running.

Two, there was a knocking sound from the door, but is ignored and muffled by Hunk's screams.

Three, both Pidge and Lance's phone vibrates.

Pidge walks to the kitchen, where she put her phone and sees that it was a text from the groupchat.

haloweed ( 06:12 PM )

mattchiato 

yo we're here!

mattchiato

open the door you buffoons

shookeith

whose screams was that?

death take me now

What a great start of the party!

Pidge grinned at Shiro's reply - his humor is quite similar to hers after all - and she turns to Lance, who doesn't even bother to open his phone, "Lance, open the door! They're here!"

Lance groans, "Why don't you open it?"

Pidge raised her eyebrow, " Do you want to take the popcorns instead?"

Lance groans again but he walks to the door, opening it, revealing an irritated Matt, a tired Keith - who's leaning to Shiro - and a smiling Shiro.

"What in the name of flying fuck took you so long?" Matt pushes his way in, pushing Lance in process, ignoring Lance's offended squeak, plopping into the green bean bag. Shiro smiles apologetically, "Sorry about him," his eyes wandered to Matt's form in the bean bag, "he didn't drink his coffee today," before getting in with his prosthetic arm around Keith's waist and walks inside.

"And who's fault was that?" Matt pouts at his place, arms folded and looking away from their direction. 

"Oh shut up, you hag," Pidge comes out of the kitchen holding four bowls of popcorn, two on each arms and pass each popcorn to them. "Also get away from my bean bag!"

Matt stucks out his tongue, "Well I sit here first so the early bird catches the worm,"

Pidge glares at him before going back to the kitchen with a "Hmp!" , probably to take her poporn.

Keith holds his bowl and sits on the floor covered carpet, near the blue bean bag, eating some of the popcorn while Shiro sits on the edge of couch.

Lance could've sworn he saw Matt frowns but then he turns his head to Keith and talk with him, Keith leaning on the green and blue bean bags. 

Lance walks to his bean bag - the blue one - and listens to their chat, although most of his attention is towards Keith.

Shiro clears his throat, "Where's Hunk?"

"Searching for blankets,"

"... Was that his scream just now when we're outside?"

"Yup," Lance replied, munching some of the popcorn.

"He's nervous, isn't he?"

"Yup,"

Speak of the devil, Hunk comes back to the living room, arms full with thick blankets, "I found the blankets!"

Lance gives him a thumb up, "Nice, man,"

Keith makes a grabby hands at the blanket and Hunk throws him a purple blanket, he pass it to others as Keith lets out a muffled, "Thanks," just in time with Pidge coming in with popcorns.

Pidge puts the popcorn bowls on the table, and pick one of them before going to the yellow bean bag and snuggled into the red blanket. Hunk frowns at this.

"Hey, isn't that my spot?" Pidge just looks at him and smirks, "Not today,"

Lance stands up suddenly, almost stepping on Keith - who dodged at the last second, bless him - before holding both of Hunk's shoulder and push him onto the couch, right next to Shiro, who smiles at him in pity. Lance grins evilly at him and he could hear Matt and Keith's snickers and Pidge's cackles. "You are going to sit here with Shay,"

At the same time the door is knocked and Lance dashes to the door to open it as Hunk processed the words. Immediately Hunk stands and runs towards Lance's direction, "Lance!"

Pidge takes out her phone and put it near the TV, pressing the video button before going back to her spot. Matt lifts his hand and they high-fived.

"Send it to the group," Shiro reminded her with a grin.

Pidge saluted, "Will do!"

Meanwhile at the door, Lance and Hunk are wrestling to the door.

"Lance, no!"

"Lance, yes!"

With that battle cry, he managed to get out of Hunk's grasped and opened the door.

"Lance I am going to kill - oh hey Shay! Allura! You're here!" Hunk's glare turns into a smile - albeit fake, but it's better than none - as Allura raise her eyebrow at them, Shay beside her. 

Shay smiles at him warmly, "Hi, Hunk," oh no, he's so done for her.

Hunk blush and smiles genuinely, "H-Hey, come on in!" pushing the door wider, while also hitting Lance with the door a bit harshly, the girls gets inside and Hunk shows them the living room, ignoring Lance mumbles, "whipped,"

Shay introduces herself to everyone - aka Matt - before sitting at the couch next to Hunk, smiling shyly at him with a small blush on her face. Hunk smiles back at her before glaring at his two best friends who are cooing at them.

( "Wait, her name is Shay?"

"Yes, Matt,"

"I thought her name was Rockee!"

"Why would her name be Rockee?"

"Shut up, Yorak!" )

"Okay so," Allura says, "We'll be watching horror movies until we all fell asleep!"

Hunk eyes widen and he jumped, "Allura!" at Allura's innocent face - which isn't innocent at all, more like a devil in disguise kind of face - he pointed out, fear dripping on his voice, "You know I hate it!"

"But it's haloween!"

"Not yet it is,"

Allura smirked, "Well then, let's vote," everyone's attention is now at Allura, "who wants to watch horror says 'me',"

"Me!" Pidge and Matt says at the same time, it's clear they both like horror, it runs in the Holt family.

Keith shrugs, "Me, I guess,"

Lance smirks at Hunk's misery, "Me too,"

Hunk's face has betrayal written all over and give the four of them the stink eye.

Allura laughs, "It settled then!"

"Wait, Shiro hasn't vote yet!" Everyone turns to look at the man, who is fast asleep, his popcorn bowl on the floor.

Shay smiles at him in pity, "Um...," she started shyly, "You can hold my hands if you're scared,"

He's certain that Pidge is biting her lips, smiling, while Lance is muffling his scream as heat travels to his cheeks.

"Y-Yeah of course! Thanks," he says genuinely and Shay smiles.

And so the horror movie commence.

On the first two movies, no one fell asleep - except for Shiro, he needed that - , everyone too absorbs with the story. Hunk keeps a tight grip on Shay's hand everytime something scary happens, and maybe because he wants to - but no one has to know that.

However at the middle of the third, Keith's head lulled before finally leaning on Lance's leg.

Pidge and Matt cooed softly as Lance glares at them, trying and somehow succeeding in changing Keith's sleeping position into a much comfortable one, not noticing Allura's phone recording him. Keith now sleeps between Lance's legs, back and head leaning on the bean bag and wrapped up by the blanket. He could've sworn Lance played with Keith's hair for a bit but then he could be wrong because right then there was a jumpscare - he gripped at Shay's hand as Shay squeeze back in comfort - and when he looked back at Lance, there was no evidence of it.

Looking at Allura's glee expression tells him that there is in fact an evidence.

At the fourth movie, Pidge fell asleep and Matt gasp softly at Pidge's sleeping face before taking a picture of it and winking at Allura, promising to send it to the group.

At the sixth movie, his eyelids becomes heavy and he closes his eyes, hand still holding Shay's, dreaming about a beautiful girl with black and green hair.

> > >

When he woke up, Shay is already gone.

Lance and Keith are still at their spot, Pidge is now at the couch, still asleep - Matt probably moved her into a comfortable position - , and Matt, Allura and Shiro are nowhere to be seen. 

"Hey, Hunk," Allura's croaky voice tells him that she also has just woken up, and he went to the kitchen, where Allura is drinking milk.

"Morning," opening the fridge, he starts to make breakfast, "where are the others?"

Allura looks up to the ceiling, looking thoughtfully, before replying, "Shiro has to teach and Matt has an early class that he forgot,"

Typical Matt.

Allura smirks, "As for Shay," he blushed again, remembering yesterday's event, "she told me to call you to check your phone," before walking out of the kitchen, probably to wake the others up.

Hunk looks at her form questioningly before turning his phone on, eyes widen when he sees messages from someone

shaylalala >>> hunkyew

shaylalala

uh hey it's Shay 

shaylalala

i really like what we did yesterday, it was fun

shaylalala

and your friends are cool too

shaylalala

so uh, if you have this kind of thing happen again, can you invite me?

shaylalala

or maybe for smth else? :)

shaylalala 

oh my god i cant believe i sent that

shaylalala

anyway thanks and please invite me again, you're a cool guy

shaylalala

i like sensitive guys after all ;)  

Hunk blushed and smiled at how she moves from shy girl into a fiery one and saw the last message and blushed harder. Is she flirting with me?

He saved her number and replied:

hunkyew 

of course :)

hunkyew  

we'd love to invite you for more

shaylalala

:) great! wanna go on a date sometimes?

Hunk's eyes widen and he smiled so hard that his cheek hurts.

hunkyew  

i would love to 

At the background he could hear Allura screaming, "Wake up!" and Lance's screeching and Keith's groan. He also could most certainly heard Pidge's cursing and Allura's angry gasp.

But he doesn't care.

I got a date!

Chapter Text

hunkuna matata >>>  the golden trio

hunkuna matata: ok i have a confession

LEGendary: oh???

LEGendary: a coNFESSION I SEE??

tide podge: lmao shouldnt u send that to Shay

hunkuna matata: yea that's what im about to talk about

tide podge: ?????

LEGendary: did she hurt you

LEGendary: Pidge, get my gun

tide podge: on it

hunkuna matata: hEY HEY NOW

hunkuna matata: cALM DOWN PEOPLE

hunkuna matata: it is nothING LIKE THAT

tide podge: so what happen?

LEGendary: still holding my gun

hunkuna matata: pUT THE GUN DOWN LANCE

LEGendary: fiNE

LEGendary: now tell us,,,,

hunkuna matata: remember when we invited Shay to our dorm?

tide podge: yea?

LEGendary: lol of course

LEGendary: u guys were cuddling together when u sleep

hunkuna matata: YOU WEREN'T EVEN AWAKE

LEGendary: i know when my best friend is having a romantic moment

LEGendary: and Allura send me the goods

hunkuna matata: sigh

hunkuna matata: of course she did

tide podge: hypocrite

hunkuna matata: ?

LEGendary: wat u mean Pidgey?

tide podge: first of all, dont call me that

LEGendary: noted

tide podge: second of all

tide podge:  [ image ]

tide podge: ure pretty gay with Keith that time too

LEGendary: uhdsjnjdcnc

LEGendary: hOW TF DID U GET THAT

LEGendary: yOU WERE ASLEEP

tide podge: Allura send me that lol

LEGendary: fucking Allura

hunkuna matata: that is pretty gay Lance

LEGendary: wE'RE GETTING OFF TOPIC

LEGendary: what happened

hunkuna matata: she asked me out on a date

LEGendary: hwat

tide podge: im sorry but how???

hunkuna matata: she have my phone number?? idek how but she had it??

LEGendary: andddd???

hunkuna matata: we went on a date yesterday

tide podge: excuse my french but what the fuck

hunkuna matata: you're italian

tide podge: no im lesbian

LEGendary: ?? you are??

tide podge: nah fam im ace

hunkuna matata: AWW PIDGE WE STILL LOVE U

tide podge: i know and thank u Hunk but this is not about me

tide podge: this is about you

LEGendary: yeA MAN WHAT THE FUCK

LEGendary: wHY DIDNT U TELL US??

hunkuna matata: wELL IM SORRY BUT WHAT IF IT DIDNT END WELL

tide podge: pshhhh

LEGendary: iMPOSSIBLE

hunkuna matata: aNYWAY IM ABT TO HAVE ANOTHER DATE AGAIN TOMORROW AND IM BSCDNDMNHSMNS

LEGendary: GET SOME BOI

hunkuna matata:  NOT HELPING AT ALL

tide podge: dont worry guys

tide podge: i got this

tide podge: im gonna ask the others

tide podge: subtlely ofc 

hunkuna matata: he's gonna ask the whole gc isnt he

LEGendary: he's gonna ask the whole gc lol

haloweed ( 10:25 AM )

green alien: yall our homeboi Hunk is getting laid tomorrow

mattchiato: OHHHH 

mattchiato: GET SOME BROOO

literal sunshine: this is why i rarely told you secrets

shookeith: you're not better, Hunk.

loverboy lance: tru, u read Pidge's diary and  my journal

death take me now: You have a diary, Pidge?

green alien:  UNIMPORTANT QUESTION

literal sunshine: he did, it was covered with 'aliens are real' stickers

green alien: again

green alien: UNIMPORTANT

loverboy lance: in other news, he needs help

loverboy lance: Hunk is not feeling good

death take me now: Are you alright, Hunk?

literal sunshine: Supercallifragilisticexpialidocious :)

mattchiato: yeah we lost him

loverboy lance: cmon man

loverboy lance: you've went out with her yesterday u can do it again tomorrow

cherry bomb: Wait

cherry bomb: Is that why you asked me for my opinion in your clothes?

literal sunshine: yes!!!11!

loverboy lance: wait waht

loverboy lance: wHY DIDNT U ASK ME??

green alien: or me???

literal sunshine: because i was hiding it from you

loverboy lance: oh yeahhh

mattchiato: what aboUT ME?

literal sunshine: you're a disaster, Matt.

mattchiato: okay fair

cherry bomb: Lmao, I'm Hunk's first choice :p

literal sunshine: ... actually /nervous chuckle/

literal sunshine: i asked Keith's opinion first

cherry bomb: Say what now

shookeith: lol.

loverboy lance: im sorry but why

literal sunshine: cuz!! he's pretty cool and had the bad boy aura so i thought??

shookeith: just because I'm in the closet for long time does not mean I have a good taste of clothing.

death take me now: Excuse me but you're never in the closet.

death take me now: You just one day barge in the house and introduced me to your bf at that time.

shookeith: as I said.

literal sunshine: oKAY BUT GUYS HELP???

cherry bomb: Dont worry I'm coming to your dorm

literal sunshine:  finally 

mattchiato: GO GET SOME

haloweed ( 09:22 PM )

literal sunshine: the date went great thank you everyone <3

cherry bomb: Excuse me I did all the work

literal sunshine: <3

haloweed ( 11:22 AM )

green alien: im just gonna ask

green alien: why are we learning about plants when we're not even one of them like??

green alien: we dont photosynthesize

loverboy lance: well maybe you'll turned to one

loverboy lance: with how much u wear green

mattchiato: if anything Pidge is a salt

death take me now: Please don't throw him across the table when someone asked for a salt

literal sunshine: what about me????

mattchiato: sugar

shookeith: what.

mattchiato: you're a pepper

shookeith: why

loverboy lance: cuz u suck

shookeith:  AT LEAST I COULD SUCK SOMETHING

green alien: savage

literal sunshine: you walked into that one, Lance

loverboy lance: fIGHT ME

death take me now: Keith no

shookeith: i'd rather kiss Mothman.

mattchiato: you'd rather kiss Mothman than doing anything else

shookeith: what's ur point?

mattchiato: i

literal sunshine: Lance no fighting at the parking lot

loverboy lance: whomst Lance

loverboy lance: the name's Pike

green alien: your username is literally loverboy LANCE

loverboy lance changed loverboy lance's name to loverboy pike

loverboy pike: i dont know what ure talking about

literal sunshine:  sigh

loverboy pike: i have a question

cherry bomb: Yes?

loverboy pike: what's Matt real name?

death take me now: ?? Matt Holt??

loverboy pike: yeah no shit man

loverboy pike: i mean,,,, his real full name

literal sunshine: he told me his name is Matthew Holt

death take me now: he told me his name is Mattie Holt!

shookeith: he told me his name is Mattheo Holt.

cherry bomb: Okay why is everyone's answer are all different??

loverboy pike: he toLD ME HIS NAME IS MATTHEMATICS HOLT WHAT THE FLYING FUCK

shookeith: you believed him???

mattchiato: you believed that???

loverboy pike:  no

cherry bomb:  I DID

cherry bomb:  HOW DARE YOU

mattchiato: to be fair i was drunk and a disaster

mattchiato: besides no one knows about my first name >:)

loverboy pike: PIDGE??

green alien: it's true i dont know at all

green alien: i just call him Mattherine

mattchiato: sacrifice me virgin then i'll answer lol

loverboy pike: Keith, it's your turn to shine lmao

green alien: im sure he doesnt mind being sacrified at all lmaoo

literal sunshine: guys dont be mean

shookeith: that wouldn't work.

green alien: wat

literal sunshine: what

loverboy pike: hwat

death take me now: Excuse me what?

shookeith: wat.

mattchiato: okay the awkwardness is so painful

cherry bomb: As well as the embarassment

death take me now: So you're not a virgin anymore?

shookeith: yes, Shiro, I'm not.

death take me now: It's a safe sex right?

loverboy pike: andddd we're done

green alien: we are not talking abt this here

literal sunshine: ditto

cherry bomb: Anyway.

cherry bomb: This groupchat is not going to talk abt sex ok

loverboy pike: awww

cherry bomb: Keith, tell Lance where he can put his dick

shookeith: in the refrigirator?

cherry bomb: Keith no

literal sunshine: there is no d in refrigirator

green alien: not yet it is

death take me now: There is a d in fridge if it helps.

loverboy pike: SHIRO STApH

mattchiato: anyway, abt the gc

cherry bomb: Oh right

cherry bomb: This is about funs and laughs so let's play a short game.

cherry bomb: Let's put the word 'violently' in front of anything that describes action

death take me now: Why?

cherry bomb: It gets funnier

loverboy pike: violently farts

green alien: violently studies and hacks

death take me now: Violently take a long nap.

mattchiato: violently chugs coffee

shookeith: violently kills Lance, Matt and Pidge and sell their bones.

literal sunshine: violently worries over Keith's message

cherry bomb: Why do I even bother

shookeith: you tell me, Allura.

You know what this is about ( 11:45 PM )

death take me now: Okay, guys, tomorrow is the day.

death take me now: Matt, he's still oblivious about all of this right?

mattchiato: yep

death take me now: Good.

death take me now: Allura? The decorations?

cherry bomb: Most are already up in my place.

death take me now: Hunk, the ingredients?

literal sunshine: we bought it already, just need to bake it.

death take me now: Pidge, nice work with the plannings.

green alien: yeah np Shiro

death take me now: And our distraction?

loverboy pike: :3 dw everyone Lancey Lance has got it in the bag

death take me now: Great!

death take me now: Let's do this!

Chapter Text

Today is the day.

Shiro is nervous, this had been the first time they had tried to do a surprise birthday party and it hadn’t backfired yet! Which is a shocking revelation with how nosy they are.

Shiro had been wrapping his present, after making sure that Keith didn’t notice it, with the help of Matt. And Keith didn’t, remain oblivious about the surprise. At least that’s what the last report Matt had sent.

Which reminds him that he should probably check on the situation.

Shiro went to his bedroom, having wrapping his present to Keith at the living room. He opened his phone and texted them, hoping there are no havoc.

You know what this is about ( 10:11 AM )

death take me now  

Okay everyone, today is the day

death take me now

Are you guys ready?

The response is almost immediate.

cherry bomb

I’m ready, come here and help me with the decorations

green alien  

aight mate im comin with mi coffee

literal sunshine

im baking the cake as we speak

cherry bomb

Matt, how many balloons have you blown?

mattchiato  

um about three?

Shiro sighed, typical Matt behavior.

death take me now  

Matt

mattchiato

in my defense im gay

mattchiato 

also i did this in the dorm and i have to make sure Keith doesnt notice lol

Wait what. Shiro eyes bugged out and he gripped his phone tightly.

death take me now 

What do you MEAN you do it at the dorm?!

green alien

get the fuck out of there u son of a bitch

mattchiato 

if im a son a bitch then you are too Pidgeo ;p

cherry bomb

Just get out there! And make sure Keith didn't see you!

loverboy pike

ay Matt im coming to your dorm to take Keith

mattchiato 

door is unlocked Lance

mattchiato 

aND HOW THE FUCK CAN I HIDE THESE FIVE BALLOONS?!

mattchiato 

AND IT'S NEON COLORED

green alien 

sounds like a you problem there lmao

death take me now 

Just try Matt.

death take me now

Please.

mattchiato

okay im going out

mattchiato 

oh shit guYS HE SEES ME

mattchiato 

hE'S ASKING ME QUESTIONS JNDDCJNSCD

mattchiato 

LANCE WHERE TF ARE U HELP ME

green alien 

this is so sad, alexa play despacito

Shiro sighed, plopping on his bed, praying that Keith is still oblivious about this all.

Lance is our only hope now.

>>>

You know what this is about ( 10:32 AM )

mattchiato 

oh shit guYS HE SEES ME

mattchiato 

hE'S ASKING ME QUESTIONS JNDDCJNSCD

mattchiato 

LANCE WHERE TF ARE U HELP ME

Lance is running as fast as he can to their dorm. Now, if Matt had been good at hiding the fucking neon balloons, he won't have to run as if the devil is trying to catch him, but noooo, the universe just hates Lance so much, he probably loses lots of his gain weight at this moment. His phone lets out a sound and he slowed down a bit, checking out the message.

mattchiato

LANCE PLEASE MAN

green alien 

fucking Matt,,,,

green alien 

u better have a good and believable lie, Lance

loverboy pike 

dont worry my boiz i gotchu covered ;)

He did not, in fact, got this covered at all.

Truthfully, Lance had no plan at all about what he lies he would say, choosing to make it an on the spot lie and just see where it goes, but now as he runs towards the dorm, he needs to think, fast.

Lance make a sharp turn, almost pushing his teacher, Slav, before he finally saw Keith and Matt, outside of their dorm, with Keith crossing both of his arms and looking at Matt weirdly and Matt, with a weirder smile and holding an indeed, five neon balloons. He looks like he was explaining something to Keith, with how much weird hand gestures he makes and Matt looks relieved when he saw Lance, "Lance, hey!"

Keith turns to his direction before scowling, "What are you doing here?"

"Uh... Happy...," Lance had no clue what to say, looking at Matt helplessly.

No happy birthday, don't you dare to say happy birthday, Lance!, Matt's eyes and smile screamed out.

Keith is looking at him strangely.

"Uh... Happy... friendship anniversary, Keith!" Lance smiled and hugged Keith.

Bitch, what the fuck, Matt smiled said.

Lance looked like he wants to die.

Keith is looking at him bewildered, or at least try to, since Lance had hid his face on the crook of Keith's neck, "Um.. what?"

Lance pulled away from the hug and smiled brightly, "It's our one month friendship anniversary! Yay!" Is it??

Keith stared at him for a moment before his face twisted into a frown, "It is?"

Lance nodded vigorously, "Sure is, buddy! Here," taking all of Matt's neon balloons, he pushes it to Keith, forcing Keith's palm to open up and closed it when all the ribbons are in his hand, "this is for you! I asked Matt to make it and to keep it as a secret!" Lance smiled at Keith.

Matt laughed nervously, "Yep! Just for you, bro,"

Lance pushes Keith to the parking area's direction, "Now why don't you go to the parking area so we can hang out for the day to celebrate it?"

"Why are we even celebrating it?"

"Because it's an important day where I finally forgive your tacky jacket and even tackier hairstyle, now get going Mullet!" Lance shooes him and Keith gives him the finger before going to the parking lot.

Once he's out of view, they both let out a relieved sighed and Matt glared at Lance, "Why did you give all the balloons at him?"

Lance shrugged, "It's that or the party is cancelled, now go to Allura's and blow some balloons!"

Matt rolled his eyes and patted Lance's shoulder, "Okay, okay, have fun on the date, Loverboy," before running off.

"It's not a date!" He could hear Matt's laugh even when he's miles away from him.

>>>

You know what this is about ( 12:22 PM )

mattchiato 

party's still on, Lance managed to cover me and they're on a date rn lol

literal sunshine

ayyyy get some Lance!

green alien 

fucking finally

loverboy pike

it iS NOT A DATE

cherry bomb

oh he's in phase two of having a crush

loverboy pike

what

cherry bomb

the denial

green alien 

ahh yes, De Nile river

loverboy pike

blocked

death take me now 

Focus on task at hand people

death take me now

Then we could talk about Lance's crush on Keith

loverboy pike

bloCKED I TELL YOU 

loverboy pike

BLOCKED

mattchiato 

this is so gay alexa play hayley kiyoko

>>>

"So ...," Keith started, "why are we doing all this?" he gestured to the McDonalds.

Lance had wanted to take him to a pizza palore before Keith had all but dragged him to McDonalds, craving for burgers. Since it was cheaper and tastes better, Lance had allowed it and they have eaten four cheeseburgers.

"All what?" Lance tried to play coy but Keith shot him an unimpressed look, "Okay, okay, stop looking at me like that!"

Keith eyes soften and he looked around, "Why are you bringing me here all of a sudden?" 

"Because, my sweet, sweet Keefers," Lance cupped both of Keith's cheeks and squished them together, "it's our friendship anniversary, remember?" he talked slowly, as if talking to a toddler.

Keith blushed at their proximity and pulled Lance's hands away from his red face and pouted angrily, "I mean, do you do that with others too? I'm pretty sure you don't, so why do it with me?"

That's a solid argument. Lance smirked, "That's cuz you're special," and winked.

Keith's blush darkens and he glared at Lance, oh well, it's not a lie anyway.

"Besides, we haven't hangout in a long time," which is again, true, so this will disperse Matt's suspicious behaviour, "And I want to hangout with you,"

Okay where the hell did that came from.

Keith opened his mouth but Lance cuts him off, "Like a friend kind of thing! You know, since we're friends now but we rarely went together as a friends! And you're cool and pretty," Lance stopped and stared at Keith's blushing face, mouth agape, "funny and it's fun to be with you and- I'll stop talking now," 

Lance curses himself as the awkward silence stays. Keith looks at him calculatingly, frowning and folding his arms, food forgotten. His blush had dispersed and is probably trying to find a way to get away from this situation. Lance hangs his head low, waiting for the words to come out. 

Keith broke the silence and said softly, "Okay,"

"Okay I'm sorry but- wait what," Lance snapped his head to Keith. Keith looked oddly happy, standing in front of him, smiling and had his hand out for Lance. Lance took his hand tentatively and pulled himself up, "what gives?"

"Just like you said, we rarely hangout," Keith shrugged and looked at Lance's bandaged fingers, "what happened to your hands?" he furrowed his eyebrows.

The Cuban smirk, "I was beating up some bullies yesterday," a total lie.

Keith just looked at him unimpressed, "Uhuh, sure, let's go," and they walked towards the exit.

Lance smiled brightly and pulled him to the nearest arcade, bickering on the way.

They both didn't realize that their hands are still linked together.

>>>

You know what this is about ( 01:20 PM )

literal sunshine

cake is ready, Shiro i need you

mattchiato 

taKASHI I CHOOSE YOU /throws pokeball/

death take me now 

On it, Hunk.

death take me now

Matt, stop and do your job

mattchiato

but my mouth is sore from blowing

literal sunshine

im sorry but what the fuck Matt

cherry bomb

I spit my fucking tea

green alien 

dear diary, today i realize my brother is a cockslut, he had blow so many times, his mouth is sore

mattchiato

wAIT NO IT'S NOT LIKE THAT

mattchiato 

TAKASHI BACK ME UP HERE

death take me now 

read ( 01:23 PM )

green alien

lol burn

mattchiato 

thiS IS NOT THE TIME TO MEME U BITCH

green alien 

also Allura, u gotta buy the drinks

cherry bomb

On it

literal sunshine

this is so fun, alexa play 'this vine cured my depression'

>>>

When they made it to the arcade, the first thing that caught Lance's eyes is the Dance, Dance, Revolution game. Its stage is huge, fitting two people with many space between them, having blue and pink and purple neon color to attract eyes, is stated to be one of the hardest game there and is currently unoccupied.

Now everyone knows about Lance's competitive streak, which turned worse when Keith is in a different team, and everyone also knows about Keith's habit of easily riled up, even more if the person trying to do it is Lance, and usually when there are their friends nearby or with them, they're competition will be stopped immediately or will be used as a betting pool (mostly stopped sadly) and since they're both alone...

Lance's eyes flared with his competitive nature, side eyeing Keith, who has his eyes trained to the racing game, and Lance pointed to the DDR machine, "Let's play that!" 

Keith didn't even turn to look, "No,"

Lance pouted, "Oh c'mon! You didn't even see it!"

"It's a DDR game isn't it," Keith stated and tore his eyes away from the racing game and stared at the DDR machine in disdain, as if used to this type of situation - which he is but not the point.

"I- Yeah but- You gotta play it with me, man!" Lance whined, flapping both of his arms like a bird.

Keith rolled his eyes, "No, and that's final,"

"Why?!"

"I'm not good at that," Keith mumbled, looking away from the machine. Lance would have laughed at him if this is in a different situation, but he wanted Keith to play with him.

"Psh, you scared, Mullet Man?" Lance pulled out the card.

Keith eyes narrowed, his eyes flaring and he glared at Lance, "What?" Ok, that's pretty hot.

Lance smirked, happy that Keith took his bait, "You're scared that I win,"

Keith's eyes throw daggers at him but he stood his ground, although he too is scared at what Keith will do next.

Mark me down as scared and horny.

Suddenly he felt his arm being pulled and Lance realized that Keith had dragged him to the DDR machine, success!

Lance was pushed to one of the stage and he let out a small, "oof!" and glared at Keith.

Keith didn't acknowledge him, instead picking a random song and a random level before pressing the middle part of his and Lance's.

"Wha- Hey! I'm not ready yet!" Lance missed a few of his steps before finally getting his beat and played fluently. He turned to look how Keith's doing and he can't help but smirk.

Keith, true to his words, fucking sucks at DDR. He misses most of the steps and his face is scrunched up in concentration. It would've look cute had Keith's eyes didn't screamed pure anger and frustration. When the game ended, with Lance earning an A and Keith an E, Lance laughed at him and Keith shot him a glare, "Shut up! I told you I'm bad at this!"

"Yeah, but I didn't know you were this bad!" Lance sniggered, pointing at Keith's final score, his stomach hurting from laughing at Keith.

Keith rolled his eyes, "Well shit, sorry that I didn't waste my time playing this stupid game,"

Lance throws his arm around Keith's shoulder, "I can teach you how to play this game better," and winked down at Keith.

Keith went silent for a moment, his face turned red from anger? embarrassment? before he elbowed Lance in the gut and move to the racing game as Lance holds his abdomen, groaning, "Hey! What the fuck man?"

>>>

You know what this is about ( 03:13 PM )

cherry bomb

I GOT THE DEEDS PEOPLE

mattchiato 

MY MOUTH IS FUCKING DRY GIVE IT TO ME

literal sunshine

im almost done with the marshmallow and chocolate!

green alien 

im tRYING TO HIDE MY STUPID GIFT

mattchiato 

i still dont understand why u bought that of all things

green alien 

shut your fucking mouth

death take me now 

Have we bought the confetti?

cherry bomb

...

mattchiato 

...

green alien 

...

literal sunshine

...

death take me now 

I'll buy the confetti.

green alien

thanks dad ur the best

literal sunshine

oh should i bring UNO or Monopoly?

death take me now 

None of those.

loverboy pike

boTH

loverboy pike

fuCKING BOTH 

literal sunshine

aight fam

death take me now 

I have many regrets.

death take me now

Why are you texting here? Shouldn't you make sure Keith didn't find out?

loverboy pike

yeah he elbowed me in the gut so im crumpled o the ground and he left me there lol

mattchiato

may i ask why

loverboy pike 

he lost in the DDR game lmao

literal sunshine

...

literal sunshine

maybe i shouldn't bring UNO and Monopoly

green alien

nope youre bringing it and it's final

loverboy pike  

oh shit he's back

cherry bomb

aww he's worried about your wellbeing

death take me now 

Enjoy your date, Lance :)

loverboy pike

it is NOT A DATE JCHNDMCJC DAD

green alien 

lol sure jan

loverboy pike

this is so rude, alexa play 'hollaback girl'

>>>

"Lance?" Keith shook his body, "Let's go somewhere else," he crouched down next to Lance's body.

Lance groaned at the floor, still clutching his abdomen, "No, I'm in too much pain,"

Keith rolled his eyes, "You're too dramatic, c'mon, where to next?"

Lance ignored him and closed his eyes, "Goodbye world, I, Lance McClain, died in the hands of my friend, Keith Kogane, I hope my killer eat rock and die too," He could heard Keith's groan and pushed down the urge to smile.

He felt the wamth presence beside him moved and panicked for a moment, is he leaving me? What the fuck, Keith, friendship ended, before he felt an arm wrapping under his shoulder and another under his thighs and he felt himself being lifted up and Lance opened his eyes, squealing, "What the fuck?!"

Keith looked down at him, raising his eyebrow, "you weren't going to move, so I lifted you up," as if it was a very logical answer.

Lance looked at him incrediously and struggled in Keith's arms, "Put me down, Captain Doofus,"

Keith smirked, "With pleasure," before dropping him to the ground unceremoniously. Lance let out a scream and glared at Keith as he rubbed his sore butt, "That's mean!"

Keith raised his hands up at him, "You said to put you down, I did exactly that," he smirked but put his hand out to help Lance up.

Lance patted his clothes and pants to cleaned it up a bit and Keith watched him before asking "So?"

When Lance just stared at him blankly, Keith sighed, "where are we going next?"

Lance thought for awhile and pulled him, "Okay, let's go!"

"Go where?"

"The beach!"

>>>

You know what this is about ( 05:32 PM )

death take me now 

I have the confettis.

mattchiato

aww good job daddy

death take me now