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When Donghyuck enrolled into college, he thought he would be able to get away from the courses he absolutely abhorred, such as mathematics. Sure, he acknowledged the fact that it helped advance intelligence and incredible discoveries he didn’t bother to learn about, but mathematics? It was the devil’s play. Made for the spawns of Satan. Probably was curated right out of the devil’s assholes. The biggest asshole of all assholes. He digressed. Anyways -
So, when Donghyuck realized he didn’t meet the prerequisites of one of his theatre courses because he didn’t take a senior math course back in high school, and had to take a college-level introduction to math in order to be eligible, he actually kinda wanted to gently disappear beyond the earth and never resurface. Like, forever.
It was all bullshit.
Poor Renjun, who took the brunt force of his ardent ranting when they met up in the cafeteria of their institution. He’d jumped right out of his skin when Donghyuck slammed his foam container of chow mein and bottle of iced tea down onto the table. He was fuming. Seething. And whatever synonyms was left for being really fucking annoyed.
When Donghyuck aggressively ripped apart his chopsticks, Renjun put his carton of banana milk down. “Okay, I am very concerned. You look like you’re about to pulverize someone and they’re gonna look like they went through a meat grinder. Unless you’re doing one of your weird theatre exercises? Are you projecting as a criminal right now?”
“I’m not doing my weird - hey, they are not weird - theatre exercises. It’s just - “ Donghyuck opened up his container and started to stab his noodles, “theatre doesn’t need math! So why do I need to take a math class in order to fucking act? There’s no logic between the two. Like, that’s like - putting a snake and a broom together. The snake isn’t going to sweep up the floor, or pick up the broom, because it’s got no hands!”
Renjun stared at him, “Are you saying you can’t do math because you don’t have a brain?”
He exclaimed when Donghyuck balled up a napkin and threw it at his pouting face, “You’re not helping at all.”
“Well, there’s not much I can do to help. You know what Chenle would say?”
“Chenle is a little shit. He’d tell me to go file a petition to eradicate mathematics from the education system as some bizarre and useless suggestion.” Donghyuck grumbled, folding his arms over his chest, “He’d be rich enough to do that.”
“No, he’d say you just gotta suck it up and take on the class! And that’s what I’m saying too!”
“Easy for you to say,” Donghyuck mumbled, pouting at his noodles before shoving them into his mouth, cheeks bulging, “you passed all your math classes with ease. You can focus on animation all you want.”
Renjun patted him on the shoulder, “Keep your chin up, Hyuckie! You’ve got this. Remember that time you couldn’t hit that high note in that one musical you participated in? But you finally did it one day because of all your hard work and perseverance? Maybe it’ll be the same for math! How bad can it be, right?”
Donghyuck found that to be true. Now that he thought about it, he’s got spunk and determination. Once he sets his mind on something, that something would be done to the best of his ability. And he was a quick learner who could easily adjust to new content. Renjun had a good point. Truly, how hard could a math class be?
Nevermind. It was bad. Really bad. Reaaaally fucking bad.
The class met up every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. That meant Donghyuck had to listen to this crusty looking professor drone on about how they were gonna have a lot of fun doing a bunch of calculus every other day. Donghyuck didn’t even know what the hell that was. He thought math was just math. There were subsets of maths too? Terrible. And something about abstract mathematical spaces? Conservation of energy laws from physics? Jesus. Get him out of here.
Donghyuck almost falls asleep, but he kept himself awake by scribbling on the desk. With a pencil, he ended up writing I hate math !!! onto the corner of the desk, and subsequently covered it with his papers.
Once the class ended, Donghyuck didn’t waste a single second shoving all his papers into his backpack before fleeing the room. He debated whether or not to drop the class, because his spunk and determination doesn’t seem like it’s going to be enough for him to pass the course, but he needs it. If he was going to flourish as a budding actor in theatre, then he was gonna have to adopt the mindset of some really pretentious but clever mathematician, then believe it to be true in order to pass the damn course. Fake it ‘til you make it, right?
He sighed. The things he does for his dreams.
θΩθ
When Donghyuck arrived at his math class and went to the seat he had sat in the day before, he realized his passionate, three-worded detestation for math had company.
Underneath what he wrote, the reply said: Then why are you taking a math course? :-(
Holy shit. Donghyuck couldn’t believe somebody actually replied. And who puts noses in their faces these days anyways?
As soon as his professor arrived and began to launch into a spiel about the basics of calculus as a brief review, Donghyuck scribbled out a quick response to the mystery person.
because the edu system sucks
btw ur frowny face looks weird
take the nose away
Satisfied, he resumed hastily taking notes of what the professor was showing on his slides. He was literally just reciting what the textbook said, and Donghyuck tried hard not to throw his textbook out the window. And the professor.
θΩθ
Another reply.
:( Looks weird. The nose makes it cuter
Also math isn’t that bad once you get the hang of it. It’s actually really fun!!!
Three exclamation marks? Underlined? Donghyuck snorted. This person was a total nerd.
He took out his pencil and scratched a tiny response along the edge of the desk: lame. u know what’s actually fun? acting. acting is fun. not subtraction & idk linear equations & some shit
He looked back up. Everything his professor was saying was going through one ear and out the other. But when he glanced down at his graphite covered desk, he supposed he had something to look forward to in a course he absolutely hated. It was kind of like a breath of fresh air. Well, maybe if he inhaled the same air as these other math proponents, he would somehow inherit their savviness for math?
But then again, the guy beside him also smelled like weed, and the girl in front of him smelled like she spritzed an entire bottle of bergamot perfume all over herself, so maybe Donghyuck should not breathe at all.
He sighed.
As soon as class ended, he met up with Renjun outside of the Science and Tech Building, and walked together across campus towards the bookstore. Turned out that Donghyuck’s basic calculator was not fit for the course, and he needed to get a scientific one. On the way there, he mentioned his mysterious pseudo penpal of a math enthusiast.
Renjun arched his brows, his curiosity piqued. “How d’you know if the person’s not like - a drug dealer?”
“Nah, they're too nerdy to be a drug dealer.”
He tilted his head. “True. I suppose that's kinda cute. Maybe you can ask your penpal to help with your math homework.” Renjun hummed. They entered the bookstore, and he immediately made a beeline towards the plushies of the university’s mascot. Donghyuck followed after him, amused.
“Don't you think it looks like Moomin?” Renjun picked up the plushie of a snow leopard. Donghyuck entertained the thought, but the both of them shook their heads after a second’s worth of consideration. Donghyuck noticed the stack of scientific calculators beside a variety of ballpoint pens, and headed towards them. He plucked a random one and checked the price, and almost gagged.
“Holy criminy,” he whispered, “I could take professional improv classes with this amount of money. What the fuck.”
Maybe he should become a lawyer instead. He could sue the school for selling expensive as fuck calculators. It was an abomination and Donghyuck took offense to it as someone who was already piling up student loans like the rest of the student body. But if he gave up now, his mum would not be proud of him. And he was not going to become a disappointing momma’s boy.
Begrudgingly taking one to the counter, he waited for the cashier to stop fiddling with a roll of coins before he took out his debit card. The cashier greeted him meekly.
“Casio is a good brand,” the cashier said as he rings it up, “pricey, but definitely worth the investment.”
Donghyuck narrowed his eyes at him. “If I could, I'd use my phone’s calculator, but God forbid advanced technology in class.” He tapped his card onto the machine.
The cashier fumbled with the receipt a few times, ripping it out from the machine rather clumsily. The ends were all jaggedly torn as he stapled it in front of the longer receipt. After Donghyuck shoved the stupid calculator into his bag, the cashier handed him the receipt with an awkward smile, “Thank you, and I hope you, uh - have a good day with that calculator. And do lots of good things? With it?”
“I'll offer it to the devil quite nicely after I’m done my math course. Thanks,” Donghyuck wryly remarked, and waved at him. He herded Renjun towards the exit, and the both of them left the bookstore.
“You know,” Renjun said, shrugging, “the thrift store should have had one of those kind of calculators. We could have looked there first before buying it from the school bookstore.”
Donghyuck stared at him. Then stared at the no refund policy written in big, bold letters on the banner that was plastered across the plexiglass window. Then back at Renjun.
Donghyuck smiled, “Hey, the next time Jaemin tries to gift you a Moomin toy, I'm going to take it and put it through that meat grinder you mentioned last week, and stuff it in your pillow case.”
θΩθ
Acting? So you're a theatre kid?
No wonder you hate math bc you would suck at it
Donghyuck grinned, and vehemently erased the week’s old messages to make room for his own response. As soon as he rubbed away the smudged graphite, he took out his pencil and scribbled out:
screw u. I'll have u know that my mom also sucks at math so being bad at math? a hereditary thing
A distant thought in his head made him wonder if he should stay in his seat after his class ended in order to catch his mysterious math-nerd penpal. They seemed interesting and witty enough to befriend. But where would the fun be without mystery? Perhaps Donghyuck could wait it out a bit longer.
And he does.
The ongoing banter between them continued on throughout the next few weeks, and it was the only highlight of his day whenever he had to attend his math class. Strangely enough, nobody else interfered nor did the maintenance people try to clean the desk of its well-intentioned vandalism. Not even the professor cared enough to pay attention to what Donghyuck was smiling at whenever he read over their conversation - a stilted one at that, considering it continued on every other day, but it was genuinely fun and entertaining to be able to connect to someone so anonymously.
That is, until one day, Donghyuck ended up dozing off throughout the entire duration of his lecture. It was boring as usual, and he didn’t understand a single word about the limit concept his professor was going over. The boy with green hair sitting beside him - to which he faintly remembered his name to be Jeno - kept sighing and nodding off to sleep. Seeing him sleep made Donghyuck sleepy, so he ended up putting his head down. The next thing he knew, he went slack dead into dreamland.
He didn’t wake up from his dream about an absurd musical about Moomin and Companions - courtesy of Renjun’s constant verbal expression of his adoration for the trolls - until somebody poked him awake with a dull object. Donghyuck startled like a body being zapped back to life, sending his pencils and textbook flying, and a piece of paper was glued to the side of his face.
He groaned when he peeled the paper away; he’d drooled on it, embarrassingly enough, and it had smudged the ink on the sheet of notes his professor had given the class. Donghyuck quickly rubbed away the dredges of drool from his cheek, hoping he didn’t look like some depraved monkey that had been in the middle of a hooha.
“Um,” someone cleared their throat, and Donghyuck looked up remembering oh yeah, someone saw me flooding my notes with my own spit, fucking great, “that’s my seat.”
Donghyuck blinked. He glanced down at the object the guy was holding in his hands. It was a calculator from that stupidly expensive brand. He looked back up at the guy, pegging him familiar, before he recognized that awkward and nervous smile.
“Cashier, cashier!” Donghyuck exclaimed, “You’re the cashier from the bookstore!”
“I am?” He was clearly taken aback, “I mean, I am, but - “ The cashier frowned at him, before he tensed when his gaze fell on the desk. Then his gaze snapped back up at Donghyuck, eyes widening. Instead of a coherent sentence, he ended up stammering you- while pointing back and forth between Donghyuck and the desk with wild gesticulation. Donghyuck frowned.
“You what? You are gorgeous? I already know that,” Donghyuck furrowed his brows, “I mean, I appreciate it. I’m flattered, but if you really wanna flatter me, let’s negotiate a refund over that Casio calculator I bought. How about that?”
The cashier expelled an exasperated breath and pointed at the desk with more certainty, “I was trying to say that you are the annoying theatre kid who’s been slandering math because you suck at it!”
Everything suddenly comes into light. Donghyuck peered at the cashier, mouth opening in realization as he stabbed a finger in his direction, “Oh. Oh. I can not believe that you’re the pro-math geek with a superiority complex I’ve been communicating with for the last few weeks!” Then his expression grimaced in both confusion and offense taken, “And what do you mean annoying? How am I annoying? You’re annoying!”
“Wh - I don’t have a superiority complex, and I’m not a geek! You’re just - you’re just - “ The cashier motioned helplessly at him, “you’re just biologically unwired to comprehend mathematical scenarios and equations as a functioning high-maintenance pretentious theatre kid with a penchant for the dramatics!”
Donghyuck stood up from his seat, affronted, “Excuse me?”
“You’re excused.”
“Look, cashier kid - “
“I have a name, and it’s Mark - “
“Fine. Mark, you can take that expensive as hell calculator - “ Donghyuck pointed at the one in his hands, “and shove it up your ass. I’m pretty sure you can reach deep enough since your head’s already stuck in there!”
Mark opened his mouth to retort when the words disintegrated at the tip of his tongue, croaking instead. His eyes rapidly fled from Donghyuck’s vexed face and scanned the classroom. Donghyuck followed his gaze, and realized their contretemps had attracted nearly all of the students’ attention - even the professor was staring at them with an entertained look. He watched the way Mark’s face turned beet red, the colour spreading down his neck and up to the tips of his ears. He looked like a deer caught in the headlights. Or a guilty chipmunk.
Fortunately, Donghyuck lived for the spotlight. That was one of the quintessentials of being in theatre, so obtaining the attraction of all of the classroom inhabitants didn’t deter him as much. Sighing, Donghyuck bent down to pick up his fallen textbook and pencils, gathered up all his things, and shoved them into his bag.
Nostrils flaring, he whirled around and pointed a finger at Mark’s chest, “We are going to resume this heated debate about who’s pretentious or not later, got it? Meet me at Black on Black - c’mon, you gotta know where that cafe is - after your class ends. Capiche? Capiche.”
“I don’t like coffee,” Mark frowned.
Donghyuck stared at him, “Are you even a millennial? That was a rhetorical question. Don’t answer that.”
Swinging his bag over his shoulder, he tapped his forehead twice in a mock salute, and left the classroom.
θΩθ
“You just met the guy and you already asked him out on a date?”
Donghyuck rolled his eyes, arms leaning against the high-top counter of the cafe. Jaemin sat beside him, his black attire blending in with the walls. It was a quaint cafe situated right around the arts building, and was popular among students who dressed like hipsters aiming for a certain dark aesthetic. Donghyuck found it funny, since Jaemin was the opposite of that. The guy was the embodiment of all sunshine and stars. Even his hair matched the colour of the sun.
“First of all,” Donghyuck held up a finger, “it is not a date. It is going to be an angry exchange of words pertaining to who is the more pretentious and annoying one. Second of all, I didn’t ask him out. I told him to meet me here. If he doesn’t show up, then I can presume that I’ve won against that math prep.”
Jaemin’s lips twitched as though he was trying to stop himself from smiling, “Don’t you think you’re harbouring a bit too much animosity against that guy? I mean, you’ve literally just met him. Renjun told me that you got to know him through - like, vandalism.”
Donghyuck looked up in thought. It wasn’t as though he was genuinely angry at Mark. Even before they met in person, their repartee was lighthearted and never serious. Donghyuck just thought it was fun to mess with him.
Although he was expecting someone to be more upfront about his prior insults about the beloved subject, but Mark seemed - well, shy. And actually nice. And a lot more cuter than he imagined. Wow, maybe Donghyuck did kinda of subconsciously ask Mark out on a date that’s not actually a date but could be considered as a date.
He looked up when the bell chimed, signalling a new customer walking in, and Donghyuck saw that it was Mark. Right on time. He vehemently poked at Jaemin’s thigh, “That’s him! Shoo, shoo, get back to your job, goody-two shoes!”
“Rude much. I’m still on my break,” Jaemin huffed, sliding off the tall stool and dusting off his apron. He walked into the backroom of the cafe when Mark approached Donghyuck after noticing him by the counter, a distinct frown on his face. His blonde bangs fell back slightly when Mark looked up at the chalkboard menu, scribbled with fancy-sounding drinks. He looked back at Donghyuck.
“Are we still fighting about who’s more pretentious?”
“Depends if you still think I’m annoying.” Donghyuck sipped his latte, to which Mark reacted with his trademark awkward smile.
Mark took a seat next to him with a resigned sigh, “I mean, I don’t think you’re that annoying. You just - You haven’t seen the beauty of math yet! It isn’t all that bad. You just suck at it, and it's totally understandable. I mean, I suck at - uh, literature sometimes. But you don't see me calling Hemingway an overrated minimalist who had a major influence over contemporary literature because I have a hard time comprehending subtext and themes of his stories.”
“Oh, Hemingway is so boring.” Donghyuck groaned, “I rather have the Oscar Wilde sorts. Like, a bed full of rose petals? Sipping champagne? Silk robes and like, gold jewelry? Having an internal monologue that takes up thirteen pages describing your love interest’s eyelashes? That's a lot more grand.”
Mark opened his mouth, indubitably about to argue, but stopped himself. He was already here because of another argument, and sighed. “Anyways. I can - um. Help you. With math, to make up for calling you a pretentious theatre kid with a penchant for the dramatics. It was an over-exaggeration. I mean, I don’t even know you, even though we’ve talked via the desk for the past few weeks. It was fun talking to you though! And - like, you’re a good person. Well, you seem like a good person - “
Jaemin must have over heard Mark’s rambling, because he appeared with a glass of water and placed it on the counter before him. Hearing Mark talk made Donghyuck’s throat feel parched. But he thought over the offer. They were basically acquaintances already - friends, even, if the exchange of insults counted as a sign of mutual understanding, and it'd benefit him extraordinarily well.
“You know what, Mark?” Donghyuck placed his cup of latte down as Mark picked up his glass of water to sip on, “I think I like you.”
He watched in amusement as Mark choked on his water, sputtering all over the place. Trying not to laugh at Mark’s obvious misunderstanding, Donghyuck tapped his fingers against the counter and nonchalantly hummed, “Smart, a big of a mess, easy to tease, and a total nerd. You seem like a nice guy to befriend. I’m gonna take you up on that offer to prepare myself for midterms. In exchange, I’m going to treat you to coffee every time we meet up as an apology for accusing you of having a superiority complex, and as a token of gratitude.” He nodded determinedly.
Mark wiped his mouth with a napkin, looking a bit red in the face, “But I don’t like coffee.”
“You’re a math major and you seriously don’t like coffee?”
Mark frowned, “I’m not a math major. I’m a business major.”
“And what?” Donghyuck grimaced, “You just take math classes for fun?”
“They’re useful, especially for economics. And maybe.”
Great. Donghyuck was going to have a field day with this guy.
Operation Pass-His-Math-Course commenced next week, after they exchanged numbers to instant message each other rather than resorting to vandalism. Donghyuck learned that their age gap consisted of one year, and that Mark was Vancity bred and born. He made a note to mention how much his hometown hockey team sucked to rile him up.
They met up at the library, finding a table next to the window as Donghyuck slammed his textbook onto the surface with a resounding thud. He shifted his workbook so it faced Mark, who sat across from him.
“What?” Mark looked at him, puzzled, “You want me to do it for you?”
“You said you'd help me right?”
“By teaching you, not helping you cheat. You won't learn anything if I do all of the work,” Mark frowned, getting up from his seat to sit beside Donghyuck, bringing the workbook around. He stared at the page in disbelief, “This is so easy.”
Donghyuck angrily sipped on his juice, “Okay, Mr. Know-It-All, more teaching and less boasting.”
Picking up a pencil, Mark started to underline the key words in the question as he read it out loud. Donghyuck stared hard at the page, distantly listening to him talk about two variables related by the equation 2lnx + lny = x - y. And then something about the tangent line in relation at the point (1,1).
“So,” Mark eagerly tapped the page with the tip of his pencil, literally beaming, “you would have to differentiate this equation implicitly. Do you know how to do that? No? Okay, that's okay. I'll show you this time - “ He vehemently scribbled something Donghyuck did not understand at all. Mark continued to commentate on what he was doing in order to solve the equation.
Hearing the word ‘mathematics' was enough to entice Donghyuck to run away. But as he watched Mark’s face light up when he went on a spiel about finding the tangent line, eyes sparkling like little jewels, he found it endearing. Cute. It was like watching a kid get excited over amusement park variety ice-cream.
Donghyuck furrowed his brows. Not the train of thought he was going for.
Mark triumphantly shoved the workbook towards Donghyuck, “The answer is 2y + x = 3. That's the tangent line. See? That's pretty easy. Did you get all that?”
Donghyuck snapped out of his woolgathering head, faced Mark, and shrugged. “Nope.”
Mark’s shoulders slumped, “You're more dense than the set of irrationals.”
“Excuse me,” he pinched Mark’s arm, to which the older boy swatted his hand away petulantly, “I don't know what that meant but I know it was an insult.”
“Then pay attention.”
“You know what we should do? We should take a break,” Donghyuck closed his workbook and pushed it aside. Mark argued but Donghyuck waved him off, taking out his phone as he eagerly scooted closer to Mark. “We are going to talk about Park Seojoon and his acting skills. No, wait. Let's talk Broadway. Idina Menzel? You know who she is? Tommy Tune? Let me show you the musical which he won an award for.”
“I don't know any of those people.” Mark said, “And you're not doing yourself a favour here. Don't you have a midterm in three weeks? You need to practice your nonexistent math skills, even if it makes you writhe in agony.” He grabbed the workbook and flipped it open to the page they were on before. He snatched Donghyuck’s phone, stuffed it inside his pants, and replaced it with a pencil. Donghyuck looked at his pants in disgust.
“Don't you have any pockets?”
Mark coughed. He clearly hadn't thought it through, “Yeah, but at least now you won't have the urge to procrastinate. Now, the next question!”
Donghyuck pursed his lips, glaring at his workbook. He was gonna have to burn his current phone when they were done and get a new one.
The rest of their time spent together was composed of frequent, playful banter, Mark shitting himself over Donghyuck’s teasing, and Donghyuck wanting to throw himself out the window regarding the logic of calculus. But he was starting to grasp the edges of the concepts thanks to Mark’s long-suffering lessons, and allowed himself to hope that he would be somewhat competent in the subject by the end of the week.
As they packed up their things, Donghyuck led the way to the cafe, “Time for coffee! Whaddya want? Tea? Hot chocolate? A hot and sizzling lunch set of likeability?”
“Hot chocolate is fine,” Mark said, sticking out a leg to trip Donghyuck. He stumbled but thankfully didn't hit the ground. Donghyuck scoffed, straightening his clothes.
Once they arrived at the cafe, they waited in line. As they approached the counter, it was Taeyong who greeted them with a bright smile and a surprised expression.
“Wow, I didn't know our Markie was friends with you, Hyuck. I feel sorry for him. You're the absolute devil,” he said teasingly, before greeting Mark himself. Donghyuck stuck his tongue out, and wondered how small the world was that they even had mutual friends too. Taeyong grinned, sharklike, “You guys on a date?”
Mark turned red. Said something incoherent. Donghyuck watched him for another entertaining moment, before he turned to Taeyong and said, “Yup.”
Taeyong blinked. Laughing, he said, “Okay. What do you brats want?”
As Taeyong rung their orders up, Mark promptly dragged Donghyuck to an empty table.
“Careful, honey,” Donghyuck waved his hand away, smoothing away the wrinkles on his sleeve, “no need to get so rough.”
Mark frowned at him, evidently still red, “We are not on a date.”
“You're right. It's a study date.”
Sputtering, he hit him in the shoulder, “No!”
Donghyuck laughed, having way too much fun, “I'm just joking around. Relax, Mark. We're just - y’know, two bros. Getting drinks together. Like normal bros.”
Mark looked at him suspiciously, as though waiting for him to crack another teasing remark. But then he started fidgeting, shoving his hands into the pockets of his ripped jeans. “So, um. I guess you don't have a - uh. Girlfriend? If you were able to say you're on a date so easily?”
Donghyuck looked at him funnily, “You seem like the type to go ‘no homo!’ if you were to do something barely affectionate with somebody of the same gender. But on the contrary, I am all the homo. You know why? Because I'm gay. Gaaaaay. Really gay. So no girlfriend. But girls are great.”
Mark opened his mouth. Closed it. Stared at Donghyuck. Opened his mouth again, “Oh. Oh, um. Oh. Okay. I - good to know.”
“Why?” he looked at Mark quizzically.
“Nothing,” Mark mumbled. When their names were called for their orders, Mark nearly jumped over tables in his hasty pursuit of the high top counter to grab their drinks. His face was still red. He blushed pretty easily.
He was still acting kind of weird even as they parted ways. Some distant part of his mind thought that perhaps Mark had a problem with him. Then again, he seemed more flustered and (relieved?) than anything problematic. Just because he went to church every Sunday doesn't mean he was gonna accuse Donghyuck of being the devil.
Shrugging, Donghyuck sipped on his iced latte as he waited for the bus to return home.
θΩθ
Renjun stared at him. Stared at Mark when the guy was too busy blabbering about how insanely cool math was to notice. Then stared back at Donghyuck.
“The last I heard, you guys were indirectly calling each other assholes. Now you're friends? Study buddies?” Renjun raised his brows, then proceeded to beam like a thousand-watt light bulb, “Cool. This feels like a romcom meeting! Does that mean Mark is a part of our little crew?”
“Crew?” The both of them repeated the word incredulously.
Renjun vigorously nodded, “You, me, and Jaemin. Add Mark in and that makes our crew into a squad.”
“What is the name of our crew, anyways?” Donghyuck narrowed his eyes.
“Um,” Renjun shrugged, “The Nerd Herd?”
Mark didn’t bother to hide his snort as he hid a smile behind his hand. Donghyuck was appalled.
“Seriously?”
“Well, Jaemin suggested The Round Pegs in Square Holes or the Spicy Liberals, but then I was also kinda thinking The Bluffmasters too? Crap Collectors?”
Mark glanced at Donghyuck, “I like The Nerd Herd better.”
“That’s because you are a nerd.”
“Well, you’re a drama nerd.”
“Oh, speaking of drama!” Renjun exclaimed, tapping on his phone, “D’you wanna see the iconic play Hyuckie was in when he was a sophomore? It’s called Crazy Town, a comedy.”
Mark immediately put his calculator down, eyes sparkling, “Yes.”
Donghyuck groaned as Mark scooted closer to Renjun, taking an earbud and leaning forward to look at the phone screen. He should have known that Renjun was sentimental enough to keep those recorded videos on the go. At least the both of them were getting along.
He rested his head on his folded arms on the table, agonizing over the fact that Mark was gonna see him imitate a seal as an overachieving preschooler aiming for elementary presidency. And a whole lot of embarrassing things for comedic value.
Renjun grinned excitedly, “That’s Jaehyun, a senior, and he was chasing after Hyuckie because Hyuckie told him that the only way he could get laid was if he crawled up a chicken’s ass.”
“It was to get a genuine, angry reaction out of him,” Donghyuck grumbled, remembering the scene quite well. Jaehyun was playing as some old guy, and Donghyuck was playing as a rebellious teenager. The old guy was supposed to get indignant about the teenager being disrespectful, so Donghyuck took matters into his own hands and believed he could make the scene a little more vibrant and realistic. Needless to say, Donghyuck almost lost a lung that day.
Mark became teary-eyed after laughing so much. Donghyuck threw a balled up scrap paper at him, but it only amplified his laughter. He has an endearing laugh, Donghyuck thought to himself. Then he grimaced, wondering why he even thought that in the first place.
He was beginning to get a lot of weird thoughts about how cute Mark was these days. It was unnerving, to say the least.
It wasn’t like he didn’t like Mark. The guy was cool. He was cute. Pretty good-looking. Fun to rile up. Not that pretentious. And, well. Donghyuck was really gay. Gaaaay. (Super gay.) But Mark seemed more of the token straight friend, and any chance of him being part of the rainbow spectrum was under fifty percent. However, whenever he acted a bit out of the straight stratosphere, Donghyuck wasn’t sure if it was a tell-tale sign of interest.
Example one: the other day, the two of them were studying (not really) in the grassfield near the library when the tables inside were all taken. They’d accidentally brushed hands when the both of them were reaching to turn over the page of the textbook, and although Donghyuck hurriedly apologized, Mark merely blinked at him. Then proceeded to tell him how soft his hands were. Then proceeded to ask if he could hold his hand.
“Uh - hand lotion is great. Great for the hands. Um,” Donghyuck said, his own disposition a little flustered as he felt his own cheeks warm up when Mark took his hand. He squinted when a ray of sunlight streamed through the tapestries of leaves from the tree hovering above them, and turned away to avoid blinding himself. He barely noticed that Mark was staring at him when the sunbeams had highlighted his features, soft but bright in the springtide warmth.
When Donghyuck returned his gaze back on Mark, he looked a little pink in the face too. He spent all night wondering if that was qualifiable underneath the gay checklist. But it wasn't time for panicking. Not yet.
Fast forwarding to midterms, Donghyuck realized that it was time to panic, and not because he was probably going to fail.
Donghyuck survived the week even though it was his first year as a college student. Other than trying to prove himself as a considerably good actor who possessed spectacular singing skills during his evaluations for his theatre classes, he endured his math midterm quite well. He read online that if one was unsure of a question, one should always colour in C for the scantron. That's what Donghyuck did for the majority of the questions.
When he'd been notified that his grade had been already inputted a week later, he paused in the middle of walking towards the library in a momentary wake of apprehension. Donghyuck reluctantly checked his grade through the college’s online student self-service website, and almost had a heart attack.
“Sweet Jesus,” he whispered when he caught the sight of his grade. He stared at his phone in disbelief when he looked up. Donghyuck was about to quickly head into the library, but he didn't have to when he saw Mark leaving the wide doors just in time. (Of course he would be in the library. The guy even studied as a pastime.) Mark startled when Donghyuck yelled his name, and then began bulldozing past students to approach him.
“I passed!” Donghyuck laughed, waving his phone around as he literally half-hopped, half-ran, towards Mark. “I fucking passed!” He whooped in triumph, and without thinking, Donghyuck threw his arms around Mark and hugged him. The impact almost knocked the both of them down when Mark stumbled backwards. Donghyuck was too ecstatic to even be aware of their close proximity. All he could think about was how he should colour in the letter C more often if it got him to pass.
He hadn't realized that Mark had reciprocated the hug as well, his hands tightly around his waist, when Donghyuck heard him laughing.
“Congrats, Hyuckie! I knew you could do it.” His face was scrunched up in a wide, brilliant grin, too warm and cheerful for Donghyuck to handle when Donghyuck pulled back, their faces not too far from each other's. His heart may have did a backflip. And a somersault. And a tumble. Loads of tumbling.
And that was the exact moment when Donghyuck went oh shit, and I think I might like him. A lot. A lotlot. Lots and lots and lots.
θΩθ
He didn't know what to do.
Of course, the first instinctive thing Donghyuck did do was to crush all his feelings, burrow it down into a very deep hole, and ignore it. That is, until he started dreaming about Mark, and how most of the dreams consisted of them doing sappy couple things. It was not good for his heart.
When he couldn't even focus during his theatre class, spilled coffee all over his favourite jeans because he apparently couldn't even drink properly, accidentally called his professor mom when he'd been daydreaming about what his mom would say if she knew he fell for a possible straight guy, and almost landed head first into a bush, that was when Donghyuck finally had enough.
He called in the experts.
Renjun sipped on his chocolate milkshake. Jaemin stared at Donghyuck while he shoved an entire waffle into his mouth. They were sitting across from Donghyuck in a diner for brunch, although it'd been a spontaneous and last minute invitation. Donghyuck had just finished explaining his predicament, and received nothing but blank looks from the couple.
“And why is it a problem that you like Mark?” Jaemin frowned.
“Well, first of all, I don't know if he's into guys. Or into me.”
“Why wouldn't he be into you?” Renjun asked, “You're like a big ball of sunshine! Exfoliating the earth’s air with your bright presence! You two were quick to get along too. That should mean something, right?”
“Have you tried asking him too? If he's into guys,” Jaemin scratched his cheek.
Considering Mark was easily flustered, which made him more eager to escape, Donghyuck didn't think he'd get an answer if he were to directly ask him about it.
“Okay, well. I'm not sure if we could be of much help. I was honest when I asked Renjun out,” Jaemin said, looking up in thought, “Honesty is the best policy, Hyuck. That's the best you can do when confessing to someone.”
“Or you could always win Mark over by appealing to something he really likes.” Renjun shrugged, “Jaemin gave me a whole bunch of Moomin merch.”
Jaemin grinned, reaching over to pinch his cheek, “Moomin merch was one of the best investments I've ever made.”
Donghyuck tried not to gag, but he found logic in their words. He wanted to resort to honesty as a last option, so he listened to Renjun’s advice first. What did Mark like? Rap, Jesus, chocolate, bagels - math? Oh, right. Math.
That was how Donghyuck ended up spending an hour scrolling through the web for math pick-up lines.
The next day, he met up with Mark for another math study session. Before Mark showed up though, Donghyuck busied himself with writing down the pick-up lines onto his hand, and pulled his sleeve down to cover it when Mark appeared. With another arduous day of trying to understand calculus, Donghyuck discreetly lowered his sleeve and peeped at the words scrawled messily on his skin while Mark was busy explaining the equation to him.
“Hey,” Donghyuck spoke up, and Mark stopped, looking up at him in question. “Are you, uh - “ He quickly glanced down at his hand before meeting Mark in the eyes again, “a forty-five degree angle? Because you're acute-y.”
Mark squinted at him.
Donghyuck glanced down at his other hand, and read in a deadpan voice, “You are the solution to my homogeneous system of linear equations.” He didn't even know what the hell that meant, but it sounded good enough. Donghyuck looked at his wrist next, “Um. You're sweeter than 3.14.”
“What're you doing?” Mark was staring at him, nonplussed, but was without a doubt fighting back a smile.
“You fascinate me more than the fundamental theorem of calculus.” Donghyuck read from his arm, and agreed to that. Mark blinked, looking a bit lost but gradually more red. It reminded Donghyuck of the blushing pinks of the setting skies.
“Where did all these math pick-up lines come from?” Mark laughed nervously, twirling the pencil in his hands.
Donghyuck sighed. He never was very patient when it came to these kind of things. He should probably resort to honesty, and it hasn't even been forty-eight hours since he last talked to Jaemin and Renjun. But maybe if he got rejected now, he would have a peace of mind and a calmer heartbeat instead of dragging his misery on for more than necessary.
With a deep breath, calming his nerves down like he often did before a big performance, he said, “My friends told me that I should ask you out because you can't differentiate.”
Mark stared at him. “What?”
“I honestly have no idea what differentiation has to do with asking you out, but I am asking you out.” Donghyuck cleared his throat, sitting up straight as he faced Mark, clear cut and concise, “I never once thought math as a likeable subject, but your influence is awfully strong. And I believe that the people who have changed how you view a part of the world is important and is part of the whole process of having feelings for someone.”
“You - “ Mark pointed at himself in awe, “you have feelings for me?”
Donghyuck gestured around them, “No, I'm confessing to the earth’s air, exfoliated by the sunlight. Yes, Mark, of course I like you and your nerdy math self. You're, like, the only person here I'm telling this to.”
Mark nodded slowly. His gaze fell to the workbook, but he looked lost in thought as he tapped the end of the pencil against the table. Donghyuck didn't know what was so interesting about a bunch of numbers and symbols when he'd literally been just confessed to by him.
Unexpectedly, Mark scratched the back of his head, glancing at Donghyuck with a shy smile, “I thought you didn't like me.”
“What made you think that?” Donghyuck frowned, “Just because I tease and make fun of you doesn't mean I don't like you. That's just my way of saying that I do like you.”
“No, I meant - I was, um. Kinda? Trying to give you hints? That I like you too? But you didn't seem to notice. Or maybe you did notice but didn't want to bring it up or respond to it.”
Donghyuck closed his mouth. Stared at Mark as though he'd grown another head. What. What. Donghyuck thought he heard wrong, but then he furrowed his brows.
“Wait. You mean you've been - what? Flirting?” Donghyuck said, “This whole time?”
Mark nodded. He looked as though he was about to combust. Great, because Donghyuck was on the verge of combusting too.
“Dude, you call that flirting?” Donghyuck said, “I didn't even - when did you flirt? I couldn't even tell! We could have done sappy couple things a lot sooner! You didn't even tell me you were into guys!”
“I thought I was obvious,” Mark frowned.
Donghyuck sighed, “The only thing you were obvious about is how much you love math. And would marry it, probably, if it had an embodied form.”
Mark grinned, a little sheepish. “You're not wrong, but that's only if I hadn't met you.”
He tried to ignore the fact his heart was beating out of his chest and was about to lurch past his throat. He lightly smacked Mark’s shoulder when he didn't know what to say.
“So, um. Are we - “ Mark motioned between them in uncertainty, “together now, then?”
Donghyuck crossed his arms, sitting back in his chair. “Take me out on an actual date first, and then we'll see. And please, no math.”
“Deal.” Mark stuck out his hand, and Donghyuck almost laughed. Cute. Completely cute. He was going to have to ban himself from using the word cute because he's used it way too many times already in the span of two and a half months.
Instead of shaking his hand, Donghyuck leaned forward and quickly, but lightly, pecked Mark on the cheek. He was terribly warm. Donghyuck leaned back with a cheeky grin on his face, enjoying the view of Mark’s surprised expression.
“Deal.”
And funnily enough, Donghyuck hadn’t ever thought that he'd find a candidate for his heart through vandalizing school property. But holding Mark’s hand right there and then, Donghyuck doesn't feel a single ounce of regret.
(Even if he did have to pay a fee, but he supposed it was just one of many things sacrificed in the name of love. Also spite, because he was totally going to sue the school. Fuck capitalism.)