Work Text:
Rapid keystrokes echoed through the dark office as the formally dressed redhead typed another furious response to her contact. She had been working for hours now because her husband had left town for a week and she had to make the most of it. Most trophy wives didn’t lock themselves in their husbands’ offices whenever they were without their husbands, yeah, but her business was something his ears could have never heard about.
She wasn’t married to Emilio because of his money. She didn’t love him either. She was married to him because of convenience. He had everything she needed for her plan to work, for her business to run smoothly. It was just that he wasn’t someone she could ever love. He was nice, but he was not her.
It still bewildered her how she had missed this. How had she not come across the idea of not only doing a background check on him but also his children? Then they wouldn’t be in this web of inexplicably complicated relationships right now. Would she still be attracted to her? Would she still think she’s one of the most incredible people she has ever met? Maybe.
Maybe they would still be in this situation. Maybe this was what they were meant to have…
Rose cursed herself as she smacked a palm against her forehead. Emilio would be back soon, she had to use the little time she had to focus on her business.
She wouldn’t have to be married to him if she didn’t have this business, though. She could be with her instead, she wouldn’t have to choose between work and love. But she knew it could never happen in this life, she would always have her job, her money. It was enough, she didn’t need any of the emotional crap she saw around herself every day.
But that couldn’t stop her from wanting her.
Rose groaned and shot up from her chair to walk on the balcony. She folded her arms on the railing and looked toward a specific part of the city where a white condo stood. It was her house. Rose hadn’t been there ever since Allison had moved in. Neither of them liked the idea of cheating, Rose because it made her crave for more, and she because it drove her to drink; she, too, wanted more. But she could not control herself like Rose could, so she transferred the need to be with Rose to be the urge to forget herself in alcoholic beverages.
She took a deep breath of the late-night Miami breeze before returning to her work, falling into the chair with a loud sigh. She had just got her focus back on the laptop in front of her when suddenly, her phone started ringing. She checked caller-ID and the moment she did, she wished she hadn’t done that. It was her.
Rose decided it was better not to accept the call, so she hit the red decline button on the screen and moved her eyes back on the documents. She had probably just called to ask her to meet up and have sex, she didn’t call for much more than that. It didn’t help that he was out of town either. Whenever Emilio went on a trip, Rose’s phone rang and the next couple hours they would spend in her bed, doing things a stepmother and a stepdaughter shouldn’t be doing. They knew it was wrong and didn’t like the idea of cheating but somehow, they just ended up like that all the time.
It wasn’t like Rose had asked for it to happen. Their relationship was not only bad for her, it was bad for Rose too. Rose would have never believed she would be jeopardizing her plans like this for only one person. One person who was actually so reckless, so weak, so…
But she couldn’t help it. Rose loved her. She loved her with all of her heart and as much as she tried to ignore it, she couldn’t. Since they couldn’t be together, be in love in its whole extent, they had passionate, animalistic, raw sex. They used touches to tell each other how they felt, it wasn’t that often that they actually said any of the words out loud.
The sound of her phone ringing once again pulled her from her thoughts. She knew she wouldn’t stop calling so with a sigh she picked it up.
‘Luisa?’
‘What are you wearing right now?’
Her voice was slurring through the phone.
‘Are you drunk?’ Rose gasped, popping up from her chair and starting to nervously pace around the room.
‘No, I am not drrrrrrrrrrunk.’
The purred ‘r’ gave the woman away.
‘Luisa,’ Rose’s tone was worried but firm.
‘Please tell me you’re wearing that light blue buttoned up shirt with the black skirt and black strapped high heels because oh my god, I absolutely looove you in these. I looooove you anyway too.’
‘Are you at least home? Is Allison there?’
‘Would I be calling you if she was? Roseeee, I wanna fuuuuck you, come over.’
Rose had already grabbed her keys and was walking to her car.
‘I’ll be there in ten minutes. But not to sleep with you, Luisa. Please, just sit down and drink some water ‘til I get there.’
She hung up her phone as she opened the driver’s door and sat in. Luisa had been doing so well lately, she had been sober, her marriage with Allison seemed to be making her happy – even if it made Rose jealous to her very core – and her clinic was running like a well-oiled clockwork. Rose knew Luisa loved her job, so the fact that she was actually earning a decent profit with it made her quite proud of her stepdaughter. Ugh, stepdaughter. If only it weren’t like that.
Why would she do that to herself again? Why would she break her sobriety of months? Why would she do it when everything had finally started falling in its place? Why would Allison not stop her? What was the matter with that person?
It couldn’t have happened just like that. Luisa had enough willpower to resist her temptations on a regular basis. Rose had started to understand that whenever Luisa felt her footing disappear, she wanted her memories of it to do the same – vanish into the broad daylight. She wouldn’t let her do that to herself. Not today at least.
Her worry started rapidly growing as she remembered something that might have triggered Luisa’s need to drink.
‘I can’t see you anymore,’ Luisa said, her voice as fragile as porcelain. She freed herself from Rose’s embrace and rolled on her back. Her fingers pulled lazily through her messy dark brown hair as she stared at the ceiling. Rose turned her eyes where Luisa’s were fixed but she quickly returned them on the brunette’s flushed sweaty face. Even after hours of fully satisfying sex she felt an urge to pull Luisa’s lower lip between her teeth and taste her intoxicating sweetness. But Rose could read the situation well, so she sensed that move wouldn’t be very appreciated right now. Instead, she just let her hand wander under the blanket until she found Luisa’s hand, and took it in hers.
‘If it’s about him then don’t worry about it. He’ll never find out about us,’ she whispered while giving her a comforting smile-like expression. It wasn’t a real smile, she was too worried at the moment to smile like she usually did to Luisa.
‘No, it’s not him. It’s her,’ Luisa sighed and let go of Rose’s hand. She turned on her side, facing the wall instead of Rose. ‘I feel like we’re drifting apart.’
‘You don’t love her,’ Rose scooched closer to her and wrapped her arms around Luisa’s waist. ‘Not like I love you.’
She felt Luisa shrug her shoulders, accompanied by a scoff.
‘If you loved me, you would leave him.’
Rose pulled Luisa firmer against herself and placed a soft kiss on her lover’s shoulder. ‘It’s not that easy and you know that. You also know how I feel about you.’
Luisa found Rose’s hands locked around her and placed her hands on them. She turned her head so she could face Rose, letting her eyes drift over the pale freckled skin. ‘I love you too. I also love her and she’s the one I can actually have a life with. A life that is not sneaking around and finding an empty room at the hotel where to sleep together in. I want something more than that, Rose. I want you, but you have made it crystal clear that I can’t have you. I want to have someone who would care about me.’
‘I care about you, I love you, Luisa. How many times are you going to make me say it until you believe me?’
‘I haven’t said that I don’t believe you. You just can’t give me what I need, she can. But she has been so distant lately, I need to spend some time with her. She’s my wife for goodness’ sake. We haven’t had sex in weeks, if not months.’
Rose groaned and let her face fall into the crook of Luisa’s neck.
‘I did not need to know that. Although, I am pretty happy to have had you to myself. We have certainly had more sex than that,’ she purred into Luisa’s ear and grazed her teeth over her earlobe.
‘Yeah, ‘cause you’re like a horny teenager,’ Luisa witted and let her hand drift down Rose’s stomach.
‘Look who’s talking,’ now it was Rose’s turn to scoff. She grinned and leaned closer to her. Just as they were about to kiss, only an inch of air keeping them apart, Luisa stopped and looked in Rose’s eyes.
‘I have to go.’
‘Stay, please. Don’t go to her. I love you, Luisa. I love you more than you can imagine. Please, just… stay. She is not right for you,’ Rose tried to stop her, Luisa already having got up from the bed and looking for her clothes, starting to retrace their route from the front door to one of the many guest rooms. They never had sex in Rose’s and Emilio’s bed, if possible. It just felt wrong. This guest room was the best option – it was the furthest one from the front door but had a nice little balcony which could be used for emergency escapes.
Luisa ignored her and put her clothes on, one after another. She zipped her black skirt and pulled her pastel pink long-sleeved shirt on. She took a seat in front of the mirror to check for any marks. She felt a pair of hands lock around her hips and familiarly soft lips land on her neck as she noticed a red bitemark on her collarbone. She put her finger on it and stared. Rose didn’t mind Luisa’s attempts to ignore her, she just let her lips run over the woman’s neck and her hands slide on her thighs.
‘Teeth marks? Really?’ Luisa sighed and tugged her shirt a bit, so it hid the hickey.
‘I had to bite down on something when you did that thing.’
‘Oh, you mean…’
‘Yeah,’ Rose shivered to the highly pleasant memory and returned to laying kisses on Luisa’s neck.
The touch of Rose’s lips made Luisa forget about her wife for a moment, so suddenly, she turned around and pulled Rose into her lap. She grabbed around Rose’s ass and crashed their lips together. Rose was a little stunned at first but moaned loudly when Luisa ran her tongue over her lips. She maneuvered them with the chair, so Luisa’s back slammed against the wall as Rose thrusted her there.
‘I have to… I… uhm,’ Luisa managed to mumble between their lips sealing together. With the pace she was currently trying to leave, she wouldn’t. It was just that Rose’s and her lips fit together like pieces of a puzzle, hers and Allison’s weren’t like that. Rose’s hands on her felt electrifying and soft, Allison’s were comforting but not enough to satisfy her. The way Rose held her made her feel like she mattered, like there still was someone who really cared about her. Allison’s embrace couldn’t bring her that kind of security. Besides, Allison wasn’t much of a cuddler anyway.
She felt the exact moment when Rose couldn’t contain her hunger anymore. The woman’s hands shifted with frank movements from one place of Luisa’s body to another. Strangely enough, it was both what made Luisa herself lose control but also what made her realize they had just spent hours in bed already and that her wife was waiting for her.
She broke one of their needy kisses and pushed Rose off her lap. ‘Remember, you chose him, not me.’
Luisa wasn’t sure if she was leaving because she didn’t want to be the one who cheated on her wife or the one who Rose cheated on her husband with. Maybe it was the hurt of getting rejected by Rose so many times before that made her feel obligated to escape. She couldn’t decide but suddenly, she couldn’t bear the thought of staying.
‘Luisa,’ Rose whispered, letting her hand brush shyly against Luisa’s while the woman put on her coat. She walked to the door, Rose following right after her.
‘You have a nice life with him. Live it. I want to go have a life of my own, I don’t need to be a pathetic side character of yours,’ Luisa accused, her voice gaining volume with every word she spoke.
‘You are not a side character. Darling, please,’ Rose took a hesitant step closer to her and brushed a stray strand of brown hair behind Luisa’s ear. Luisa ignored the burning touch and turned her head in the opposite direction.
‘Don’t call me “darling”. That’s what you call him, and I don’t want you to melt us into one. I don’t want to know that he gets to touch you like I do. I don’t want to imagine him loving you – he doesn’t by the way – like I do. But since you would rather have him and his “opportunities” than your alcoholic lover then I want to have someone who would always be there for me. I don’t want your pity, I want real affection,’ she yelled. ‘I need space, Ro. We can’t see each other for a while.’
Rose turned her gaze on the floor and bit her lip. Luisa couldn’t stop thinking how unfair it was, the way Rose looked when she was hurt. She had only seen her express such emotion when she had hurt her. It broke her heart that she was the only one who could cause her pain, but they had to do this. They couldn’t keep going on like that.
‘You are choosing her over me right now,’ Rose had to swallow before continuing. ‘Did you ever think about that? She doesn’t love you like I do, she doesn’t care, Luisa! Don’t you think it’s weird not to call your wife for days while actually being in the same area with her? You want care and affection, I can give you the last but the first I can’t provide you with.’
‘She isn’t the only one who hasn’t called. I could have called but you were distracting me with sex,’ her face turned from a frustrated shade to a smirk, looking at Rose in a slightly shrewd way. Rose reflected the expression and tentatively ran her hand over Luisa’s hip to rest it there. They looked at each other like any other time they were going to kiss but Luisa broke the atmosphere again.
‘See? That’s what I mean! You’re not good for me, Rose. I… Don’t call me, don’t contact me in any way. Bye,’ and with these words she finally managed to rush out of the door and leave a confused redhead standing in the lobby of her mansion, suddenly filled with loneliness and sorrow.
She sighed with relief as she parked in front of her house. She took one last look in the mirror out of habit, but she then realized that drunk Luisa wouldn’t care even if she had a clown’s face painted on her.
The sound of her heels clicking on the freshly wet asphalt was both prominent and unsure. She could never even begin to predict how the woman would act in her drunken state. Sometimes, she would sob and pour her heart out, constantly getting interrupted by the waves of nausea the toxin in her body caused. Other times, she would accuse Rose of being the root of all of her problems, then would fling to her and try to initiate sex. There were also times when Luisa was so drunk when Rose got there that she would only be able to hold herself in a sitting position over the toilet, dry-heaving.
‘Luisa?’ Rose said as she entered – the front door was unlocked and wide open. She looked around and listened if she could hear anything that would indicate the location of the woman.
The only thing she was greeted with was silence. It was clearly present in the whole house. Rose took a couple steps inside and pulled the door shut right after. Only indication of Luisa’s recent presence was the drop of condensation rolling down a tequila bottle on the coffee table. Anxiety drooped in Rose’s stomach as she wondered whether this was the only bottle that had been poured down Luisa’s throat that night.
With a deep breath in and out, Rose pinched the bridge of her nose, finding she still had left her glasses on with the rushing from the office. Ignoring that, she let her purse fall on a counter in the kitchen and placed her coat neatly on the chair by the dinner table as she made her way through the house.
Her eyes ran over the framed pictures on the walls. There was one of their – Luisa and Allison’s – wedding day. Carefully, she ran her fingers over the wooden frame surrounding the picture, and she couldn’t help but stare. Luisa looked phenomenal in white; to Rose’s misfortune, she very rarely wore white.
With a sigh escaping her lips, she moved to the next photo, showing a selfie Luisa had took of them kissing on their honeymoon. Every picture made jealousy grow in Rose’s gut, but she thought seeing them together would lessen her affection for Luisa. Unfortunately for her, it did the exact opposite.
She was just looking at another picture of Luisa and Allison happily together, when suddenly, she felt someone’s arms clumsily lock around her waist. A breath full of alcohol followed right after.
‘I knew you’d come,’ she purred into Rose’s ear, following it up with a sloppy kiss on Rose’s neck. Even when Luisa was drunk, her kisses made Rose feel something no one else had ever made her feel. But sleeping with Luisa, or even just kissing her while she was drunk was always a bad idea. To prevent bad decisions, Rose tried to free herself from Luisa’s grip. But Luisa clung on her like her life depended on it. Rose sighed and turned around in Luisa’s hands.
‘Lu,’ she tried to be stern, but nice, ‘could you please untangle your hands from me?’
Luisa swayed a bit, trying to shake her head. A wide grin washed over her face and she felt the need to verbally express her reply. ‘No.’
Rose eyed Luisa’s expression more carefully. She looked more away from this planet than she usually did while drinking. Her eyes were the haziest she’d ever seen, and her smile was goofy like a five-year-old’s.
‘Luisa, what did you drink?’
Luisa looked at her sheepishly.
‘Tequila!’ she suddenly exclaimed. ‘Tequila, tequila, tequila!’
Rose felt a need to support her forehead with the palm of her hand. Whenever Luisa drank tequila, she started blaming Rose for everything that was wrong in her life, but after that, would stick her hand under Rose’s dress. It was the worst drink Luisa could relapse on.
‘Did you drink some water like I asked you to?’ Rose was pretty sure Luisa had ignored her concern on the phone, but a tiny bit of hope still lingered in her.
Luisa nodded enthusiastically after thinking about Rose’s question for about ten seconds. Rose cocked her eyebrow and shot her a stern look. Luisa’s proud smile faltered, and she exhaled.
‘Fine! No, I haven’t drunk any water. But I have some weed if you want anything!’ she chimed sluggishly and then released her grip on Rose. She stumbled into the living room, Rose following right after her. After standing in the middle of the room for a few minutes in confusion, she remembered her intention and dug out a zip lock bag, accommodating a fistful of weed.
Excellent. On top of her being drunk, she’s high too? Rose mentally cursed herself for not calling Luisa that night as soon as Emilio had left.
Still, she could hope Luisa hadn’t actually consumed any of it.
‘Luisa, did you do drugs?’ she carefully took the bag out of Luisa’s hands. Luisa handed it over with great gladness, seemingly hoping Rose would join her in the high world.
‘Yes! I invited Isabel over, because you didn’t call me, and I know dad’s in Europe again,’ she slurred, expressing her disappointment, ‘and I was alone. Ali’s in Mexico, and I was alone. So, after a few rounds of strip poker, Isabel brought it out. And I said “YES”. I wanted to say yes, because no one has told me yes for a long time.’
And although Luisa was cross-faded – drunk and high at once – Rose could still see her blaming her. There it was – the first result of Luisa drinking tequila. Now it was only matter of time when the other would show.
‘Come on, Rose! I want to play Spin the Bottle,’ it was like she forgot what they had been talking about just like that. She pulled Rose into her bedroom, who had decided to play this charade with the woman until she fell asleep or sobered up. There was nothing more she could do at this point. Besides, she didn’t know what Luisa could do when she was high.
‘But there’s only two of us,’ Rose remarked as they sat down in front of Luisa and Allison’s bed. Luisa looked around for a second as if she were really amazed that it was just the two of them. Then she shrugged and pulled an empty tequila bottle from under the bed like a magician pulling a rabbit out of her top hat.
‘The more the chances are that I get to kiss you,’ Luisa grinned.
Rose rolled her eyes and motioned with her hand for Luisa to spin. The bottle stopped a good forty-five degrees right from Rose, but since she and Luisa were the only players, Luisa got to kiss her anyway.
‘Come here, you,’ she smirked, curling her finger as she leaned closer to Rose. ‘First kiss on the cheek.’
Luisa took her time closing in on Rose’s cheek and then landed a slow smooch there. She giggled as she pulled away, clearly amused with her probability of getting to kiss Rose.
‘Your turn!’ she urged Rose, shoving the bottle into her hands. Rose looked at her incredulously and spun. This time, the bottle really did land on Luisa. Luisa clapped excitedly and pouted her lips for her. Rose sighed and placed a chaste kiss on Luisa’s pouty lips. Luisa frowned disappointedly when Rose returned to her seat.
‘Too quick,’ she complained.
‘You used to think it was a good thing,’ Rose grinned, knowing fully well that Luisa wouldn’t understand her remark. Luisa didn’t comment more on it, but spun the bottle again, landing on herself.
‘What do I do now?’ she gasped, pointing at herself with her index finger. ‘I can’t kiss myself!’
Rose laughed at Luisa’s misfortune. ‘Don’t worry, I’ll help you out,’ she smiled softly at the stoned drunk, still sadly frowning. Rose brushed the furrow between Luisa’s eyebrows with her finger and gave her a longer kiss than the last. Luisa’s hands immediately found Rose’s neck as their lips brushed together, doing something Rose would have categorized as a bad idea mere minutes ago. But Luisa wouldn’t remember a thing of it in the morning, so why not let herself go for once?
But when Luisa’s tongue had been caressing Rose’s for a while, and Luisa’s hands started to slide down Rose’s back, Rose realized it was still a bad idea. Reluctantly, she pulled away. Her lungs were screaming for air and her breathing was shallow.
Luisa’s eyes were more serious than before. It was as if their kiss had sobered her up a little, so she could clearly understand what she was doing. As Rose was just about to decide that Luisa was clear-minded enough for going back to kissing, Luisa’s mouth curled up into that goofy smile again, and Rose shook her head in light amused laughter.
‘Why are you laughing?’ Luisa wondered, clumsily reaching for Rose’s hand. Rose helped her out and took hers herself.
‘Because you’re so dumb,’ she smiled, ‘but I love you.’
Luisa smiled hazily right back at her. ‘I love you, too.’
They stayed on the bedroom floor like that for a while, until Luisa’s eyes suddenly widened, and her face turned a little pale. Rose didn’t even need to hear Luisa say what she was about to do. Quickly, she helped Luisa up from the floor and guided her to the bathroom, where the woman directly ran to the toilet. Rose hurried right after, managing to collect Luisa’s hair into her hands before all contents of Luisa’s stomach made their way out of her.
At moments like this, Rose really wondered why she was doing any of it anymore. Why didn’t she stick to Luisa’s side, why did she live a fake life for her business when she could live a real life with Luisa? Nothing else seemed to matter when Luisa was hurt.
Through the fog of her thoughts, she tried to focus back on a dry-heaving Luisa in her arms, running soothing circles across her back.
‘It’s okay, it’s okay,’ she whispered in a caring tone. She could feel Luisa start crying in her embrace. Her shoulders were shaking, and she could hear Luisa sniffling.
‘It’s not,’ Luisa stuttered back. She hovered above the toilet for five more minutes before she slumped fully into Rose’s arms and let it all out. She cried all liquid she still had in her body out. Rose held her close and occasionally kissed her head, giving Luisa all the comfort she could at that moment.
‘Why are you here, Rose?’ Luisa asked confusedly after a while. It seemed like the weed and tequila were slowly starting to wear off.
‘You called me, believe it or not,’ Rose answered softly.
Luisa nodded. ‘Okay.’
This was more than enough to be said now. Luisa took Rose’s hand in hers and supported her head against Rose’s chest, on her heart. Rose ran her thumb over Luisa’s hand, letting Luisa silently recover from throwing up so much.
‘You have no idea how much I missed you these past two weeks. But I just couldn’t call you, you know that. As good as it feels to be with you, as much as I love you, we can’t do this, Lu. I need you to understand that,’ Rose sighed into Luisa’s hair. Anxiously, she waited for a reply from the woman, but nothing came. She shifted a bit under Luisa’s weight and then realized that exhaustion had beat Luisa. The woman’s eyes were tightly shut, and her shoulders were rising and falling in a slow pace.
Carefully, she lifted Luisa up into her arms and carried her into the bedroom bridal style. She removed Luisa’s dress and her bra – Luisa couldn’t stand sleeping in it – and tucked her in. With a kiss to Luisa’s forehead, she left. When she got to the kitchen, she realized that Luisa would probably have some questions in the morning, so she walked back to Luisa, grabbed a pen and some paper from her office, and scribbled a note to her.
Call me when you’re up. We need to talk.
Love,
Ro.
She allowed herself one quick kiss on Luisa’s cheek, and then really left this time. She wasn’t sure if Luisa would call her the next day, but as people say, a girl can dream.