Archive of Our Own

There’s no world out there in which Yoongi never met Taehyung.

That's what Yoongi thinks.

"Yoongi-yah," he remembers his mother saying his name, as sweet as always. Their small living room was quiet until she spoke, and Yoongi may or may not have been glad for that. "Appa's going to work in the Philippines."

Back then, when he'd had no idea where the Philippines was, he simply tilted his head and looked at his mother with curious eyes. Song Eunji's eyes softened at the sight of her son's innocence. She smiles earnestly and kneels down to his height, petting his hair carefully.

"It's somewhere very far from here," she whispers. And as always, Yoongi nodded, even if he doesn't really understand. They're going to move again. From Daegu to Busan to Seoul, and then, that 'Filipi' place his mother was talking about. That's what his father's job entails - being a factory worker in an international company means lots of relocations. "And it's outside Korea."

His world turned upside-down at that. He'd never been outside Korea, so to say that he was excited was an understatement. He'd agreed instantly, and a few months later, he finds himself somewhere he's only seen in pictures: the city of Manila.

The neighborhood they're in does not resemble the one in Seoul at all, but he doesn't really care. He was just informed that the house across from theirs is owned by a grandma who also came from Korea, and that she was living with a grandson almost the same age as Yoongi.

"Appa, do you know what the boy's name is?" He'd asked.

"They're coming over on Sunday, Yoongi. Your eomeoni invited them for lunch, so you can ask him yourself."

His father smiles at him, and Yoongi can see the wrinkles he has on his forehead. His abeoji's getting older every day, but his smile is still the same.

Yoongi hugs him.

The days passed by quickly and suddenly it's Sunday already. Yoongi's hyung woke him up too early, and he's a little grumpy about it. He was having a nice dream, but he can't even remember it anymore because Junki shook his shoulders so hard.

"Hyung, what are you so excited about?" He whines. It's not even seven in the morning.

"Eomma's talking to our neighbor," Junki supplies. Yoongi notices that he's already dressed and that his hair is already combed neatly, but he doesn't comment on it. "I heard that her grandson is coming over early because there's an emergency at the farm she owns and she can't bring him with her."

Yoongi's eyes widen at the information. He wasn't prepared for human interaction yet because it's so early. Sure, he's excited to meet a friend, but is it really worth it at six-thirteen in the morning?

He's about to protest, but before he could utter a word, Junki leans over to whisper something in his ear. "I also heard he's going to bring his toys with him."

Yes, Yoongi thinks, nodding his head quietly. It's six-thirteen in the morning and it's worth it.

He gets up immediately and his hyung flashes him a grin before leaving the room.

Yoongi is a good kid, so he starts preparing himself for his guest's arrival. He cleans his room and arranges his bed, he takes a bath, dresses himself, and then he's ready. He's proud of himself in the very least.

Not long after, his mother calls him down to the living room, and his heartbeat quickens because the boy is here what if he doesn't like me does he even speak Korean how long has he been living here again I hope he's nice-

"Yoongi! Where are you?"

“I'm coming down, eomma.”

He gulps and hopes that his nervousness wouldn't seem too obvious to the new friend he's making. First step down the stairs and he already feels like he's going to burst. Second step and he wants to back out. The third step is taken because he knows he can't back out. Fourth step. Fifth step. Sixth. Seventh. Eighth. Ninth-

"Hi!" A cheerful voice greets him as soon as he reaches the floor. Yoongi whips his head to where the voice came from, and sees a boy a little ways taller than him. His skin is glowing and sun-kissed, and his smile (grin?) forms a rectangle. His hair is a shiny black, and his eyes are colored with a striking shade of brown.

The boy keeps smiling at him, and Yoongi gulps before answering, “hi.”

In the corner of his eye, he sees his eomeoni shaking her head fondly.

"I'm Taehyung. Taehyung Kim- ay, Kim Taehyung, I mean. You must be Yoongi."

His name rolling off the boy-Taehyung-'s tongue takes Yoongi by surprise.

"Y-Yeah. I'm Min Yoongi. Nice to meet you," he responds, bowing slightly. Taehyung smiles at him again, and it's the same rectangular smile. His heartbeat quickens once more, and he doesn't even know why. His face is probably getting red, too. Maybe it's just because he's embarrassed.

(Years later, Yoongi would realize that there was a whole other reason why his heartbeat quickened that day.)

It's Yoongi's tenth birthday, and Taehyung is the only one invited to the mini celebration they're having. Plus, it's not like Yoongi has anyone else to invite. He doesn't really want his other classmates to step foot in his house.

"Happy birthday, Gi-gi!"

He turns around and finds Taehyung with open arms, holding a small box in his left hand. Before he could say anything, the other boy dives in for a hug. He hugs back, and Taehyung tightens his arms around Yoongi's torso even more.

“Taetae, you're—” Yoongi manages to say while feeling inevitably crushed by his friend's hug. “You're suffocating me.”

"Sorry!" He pulls away and lets Yoongi go, laugh already brightening up the dimly-lit kitchen area. Yoongi just eyes the small box he has in his hand with a smile. Taehyung notices this, and pouts exaggeratedly. He hands the box to his best friend. "Here. This is my present."

The small box is given a place on the kitchen counter, a few inches beside the cake that his parents bought. It's pink and looks too pretty to eat. Yoongi doubts he would have the courage to take even a slice from it, because it honestly looks like heaven. He's pretty sure the same thing is going through Taehyung's mind.

He takes Taehyung’s hand in his. It’s a normal thing for them to do— something Yoongi invented. He told Taehyung that it’s so he can feel what Taehyung is feeling and vice-versa.

"It's from Goldilocks. Strawberry Delight."

The voice startles the two boys who were both staring blankly at the cake. It's Junki. Of course it's Junki; that butthead. He's leaning on the doorframe with a smug smile. Taehyung laughs. "Hyung, me and Yoongi were having a telepathic conversation about how pretty the cake is. You just interrupted the connection."

Junki laughs at the remark and walks closer to inspect the cake. He ruffles Taehyung's hair while doing so, and Yoongi isn't sure how he feels about that.

Taehyung flicks the older boy's hand away playfully. Yoongi snorts and rolls his eyes. The three years he and his family have been here, all of them had gotten close to each other. Taehyung's grandma invites the Min family over whenever she cooks something Korean. She always says that it's because she and Taehyung suddenly missed their homeland, and wants to spend the day with other people who share the sentiment.

Overall, they sometimes act like one big family now. Yoongi likes it, because he never really got to meet his grandma. And Songyi-halmeoni is such a genuinely nice person. She treats Yoongi and Junki like they were her own grandkids, so it's always good when she's around.

The three of them chat for a bit, and Yoongi admits to himself that he looks at Taehyung more often than he looks at his brother. He had just finished grasping the fact that Taehyung Kim is really handsome after all the mothers at school mentioned it during a competition they both participated in a week ago. They'd called him 'Vincent' and said 'napakagwapong bata'.

And that's true anyway. Yoongi can admit to himself that Taehyung is handsome and more handsome than anyone Yoongi knows.

Why am I thinking about stuff like this again, he interjects in his head. He does that a lot these days, when he catches himself thinking about things (and Taehyung) too much.

So he just continues staring at the cake. The cake that looks too marvelous to eat. The cake that looks too perfect to take a slice of.

"You two should just eat the cake and stop staring at it, you know." Junki interrupts his thoughts again. He’s now between the two of them and patting both of their heads. He has a thoughtful look in his eyes, Yoongi notices, and his smile is anything but playful. "Nothing will happen if you just wait and not do anything. You're wasting time."

Taehyung squeezes his hand.

(Years later, Yoongi would realize that maybe his brother wasn’t just talking about the cake.)

Yoongi and Taehyung are eating in the school cafeteria peacefully when all of a sudden, female students are approaching their table and kneeling in front of Taehyung while holding roses and pink envelopes.

"Vincent, please accept all of our love." One of them says, and she says it in Korean with remarkable pronunciation. Taehyung looks incredibly shook, and Yoongi himself is, too. Not at all is he shocked about the girls confessing their undying love for Taehyung because it happens every other fucking day. What he's shocked about is the perfect Korean he just heard from Anne Marasigan.

"Happy Valentines!" The other girls say in unison, all presenting chocolates and roses.

Taehyung helps them all up from their kneeling positions. A lot of them look like they're so close to crying, and Yoongi thinks he understands. Sometimes he feels like crying because of Taehyung too, but for a different reason. Or maybe it's the same reason. (Ninth grade Yoongi did not know what he was doing with his life.) "Thank you girls, but you didn't have to do any of that."

After a few other words with the girls, they all dissipate and the two of them are left to their own devices once again, save for the occasional glances thrown at them by random people - especially freshmen and sophomores.

After all, who wouldn't be surprised that the famous top student and the resident 'bad boy' varsity player are hanging out in the cafeteria? People who don't know them or have never heard any story about them have no idea that they've been bestfriends since forever.

The two of them didn't really keep their friendship low-key, but the majority of their schoomates, most especially the first years, always think that they're polar opposites who have no way of getting along at all. But they walk to and from school together and spend their breaks together (unless Yoongi has basketball practice or if Taehyung needs to finish some kind of task). It should be obvious.

Still, Taehyung does most of the talking when they're inside the campus, and Yoongi always makes sure to listen even though he likes keeping up the 'bad boy' image he's built up. It makes him intimidating enough that assholes wouldn't try to mess with him.

"Yoon, when we move up from junior to senior high school, what strand are you going to take?"

Previously staring at his bottle of soy milk and admiring its beauty and Nutrition Facts, Yoongi now looks up at Taehyung, who's also looking at him intently. His round glasses are perched on his nose a little low. He looks perfect, Yoongi thinks, and he doesn't take back the thought. He knows that Taehyung looks perfect.

He looks away from the boy in front of him and continues examining the amount of sodium his soy milk has. "I'm thinking Humanities and Social Studies, but I'm not sure."

"HUMSS is in my mind too, but I think I'm going to take Arts and Design."

Taehyung looks mildly embarrassed. Half of the people in his life want him to pursue STEM, being smart in the major subjects and all that. But Yoongi knew that that wasn't the boy's passion. Yoongi knew that Taehyung liked all kinds of art; the boy liked to make art, rather than solve for the distance between two points on the coordinate plane.

So Yoongi fully supports him.

Taehyung excuses himself to go to the comfort room, and Yoongi is now left to stare at his soy milk bottle again. There aren't lots of people in the cafeteria anyway, so he can do what he wants without anyone judging him. Maybe he does want to find out how soy is sometimes more healthy than cow's milk.

(And maybe he also wants to find out what the hell his feelings for Taehyung actually are, but he thinks that it would be so much harder for that to happen.)

After a few minutes in his spontaneous bathroom break, the boy reappears. He spiked his hair up and removed his glasses, so he looks a lot more like a campus bad boy than Yoongi probably does at the moment. How Taehyung can change his aura and appearance so quickly is unbeknownst to everyone, but Yoongi thanks the heavens for it, because he looks hot as fuck.

Yoongi pays no mind to the sudden thought of wanting to sit on the boy's lap and maybe kissing him until his lips are sore, because it's gross to think that about your friend.

Especially when that friend is just a pure little marshmallow who right now is gently nodding at the nutrition facts of his own bottle of soy milk.

(Years later, Yoongi would realize that maybe soy milk is the right choice, and maybe so is Taehyung.)

Yoongi knows that what he's doing is incredibly stupid.

Yoongi knows that everytime he ignores Taehyung in the hallway, he’s hurting him.

Yoongi knows that, yet he does it anyway.

(Just months later, Yoongi would realize that he shouldn't have done it.)

Taehyung finds himself, once more, awake and wondering at two in the morning. He hasn't been like this since the night before his first day in senior high school, where he questioned himself if Arts and Design really is the right choice.

But now there's a bigger, more important question lingering in his mind.

Summer break is almost ending. Time passed by very quickly, and Taehyung knows that he should be happy about that.

But he can't be.

Taehyung doesn’t know why, but throughout the past year, Yoongi didn’t speak to him as much as he used to. Every conversation he tried to have with him felt forced, and Yoongi did not cooperate. Now that he's awake and wondering at 2AM, he can't help but ask himself what he did wrong for someone who used to tell him everything to suddenly just... stop speaking to him.

And Taehyung Vincent Kim doesn't want to cry. Taehyung Vincent Kim doesn't cry at 2AM thinking of his best friend who (probably) doesn't even want him in his life anymore.

Tang, tang.

Just when he feels tears beginning to well up in his eyes, he hears it. Tang. Someone's using their fingernails to knock on the smoked glass of his bedroom window. And only one person does that.

Yoongi.

It's Yoongi, the exact person in his mind right now.

He scrambles to get up from his bed and walks as quietly as he can to the currently-shut windows.

Tang, tang, tang.

Taehyung gulps. He's a little scared.

Of course, somewhere inside of him, he knows this is Yoongi. A serial killer wouldn't knock. A robber wouldn't knock either. So why is he somehow afraid?

In the back of his mind, he knows why. He isn't afraid because of the possibility that this person is a criminal. Maybe he's just afraid that this person is Yoongi after all, who, just a few seconds ago, he was going to cry about.

He unlocks it.

Yoongi opens the windows and jumps into Taehyung's arms. Taehyung didn't mean to open his arms like that, it's just a force of habit. Years of Yoongi barging into his bedroom at the later hours just made him used to catching the boy in his arms right after the window opens.

He couldn't be more thankful for that habit than right now.

The boy is still in his arms, face buried in Taehyung's chest. He's sobbing onto Taehyung's oversized sweater, and just then is Taehyung made aware of the fact that Yoongi is crying.

"I'm sorry, Taetae," he says through hiccups. "I know you probably hate me now, but, but I needed to come here. I-I don't want to be a-at home right now."

"Gi, I don't hate you at all. What happened?" He whispers softly, kissing and stroking Yoongi's hair as he leads him to the bed. "Calm down, Gi. What's wrong?"

Now sitting on the edge of Taehyung's bed, Yoongi probably for the first time this year looks up at Taehyung.

His eyes are visibly red and swollen even in the dim light, and his hair is a mess. His lower lip also looks like he's been biting it all night, and he's most likely been doing just that.

Yoongi takes deep breaths, and Taehyung tries not to look at him. He knows that Yoongi doesn't like it when people look at him while he's trying to gather himself.

"Mom and dad," Yoongi manages to say, using the sleeves of his oversized hoodie to wipe his face. He looks cute like this, Taehyung thinks, then remembers that Yoongi is being serious. So he shakes his head and bites the inside of his cheek. Yoongi sniffs before opening his mouth to say, "they're fighting again."

"You know that nothing is your fault, right, Yoon?"

"Yeah. I'm not a kid." Yoongi replies, then swallows showily. "But, you know, I can't help but feel that I caused this one. Just this one fight."

Taehyung sits next to him on the bed and Yoongi rests his head on his shoulders.

It takes a few moments for Taehyung to realize that Yoongi's not going to speak again, as he's now fiddling with his sweater paws and still sniffing every now and then. Taehyung can feel that his breathing's turned normal, which is good. He really shouldn't be worried anymore.

But he still is.

Yoongi rarely ever cries. And Taehyung respects Yoongi's parents most of the time, but lately they've not been good parents to Yoongi. Sometimes Taehyung can hear them screaming expletives at each other for some petty reason at the late hours of the night, and then he sees the lights in Yoongi's room turn on. He knows Yoongi can handle it, of course, but there are times that he can't. And tonight (today) is one of those times.

"Taetae."

The other boy's voice startles him out of his little dawn reverie. He's fully calmed down now, albeit his hair is still a mess that doesn't seem like it'll calm itself down. So Taehyung reaches for Yoongi hair and pats it down.

"W-What are you doing, stop," Yoongi says, weakly grabbing Taehyung's arms and very obviously trying not to laugh. Of course he's still ticklish on his scalp. Of course. "Tae, stop it, I don't want a tickle session right now."

Taehyung only smiles, and when Yoongi's hair is finally fixed, he's still smiling. He can't help it. It's been so long since he last had the opportunity to interact with Yoongi like this, and he missed it.

Yoongi punches Taehyung's shoulder gently and repeatedly whines. He has a smile on his face too, which is good, because now 'Taetae' knows that he's not the only one who missed this. "Tae, I'm being serious. Listen to me."

“What is it?” He inquires, lying down on his mattress and stretching his arms across it as if making a snow angel. (A mattress angel, his brain provides. He ignores it.)

Yoongi turns his head to look at him, and with the most sincere look in his eyes, he says, “run away with me.”

Taehyung’s eyes widen. “Sure. But why?”

“Taehyung,” Yoongi begins, “I want to run away. You have a car.”

And that's how Taehyung finds himself in another situation. He finds himself starting his Mu-X at five in the morning with Yoongi in the passenger seat, tapping his fingernails on the metal of his seatbelt.

About fifteen minutes ago, he was just talking to his grandmother on what to bring for the trip. He didn't even need to ask.

"Halmeoni, I'm going on a trip with Yoong-"

"Bring that bag your father gave you last year, it has a lot of space."

So here he is, again, staring into space while listening to the sound of Yoongi's nails drumming on metal. The boy is humming, too, and it's one of the songs that Taehyung doesn't know. Probably that new song by Gloc-9, Yoongi’s favorite Filipino rapper. He just knows of it from social media.

Anyways, Yoongi still hasn't told him where they're supposed to go. Earlier, when he said 'run away with me' like either some Disney character or a Nicholas Sparks book character, Taehyung had been mildly convinced that Yoongi was asking him to elope with him. But he wasn't, because he also told Taehyung that he should get permission from his grandma. What kind of elopement requires you to ask permission from your grandparents?

"We should go to Batangas."

That takes Taehyung by surprise. He thought Yoongi just wanted to go to Taguig or Makati and stay in some hotel, and maybe walk around Bonifacio Global City, or go to Glorietta or something. Or Intramuros. Just, something in the National Capital Region.

But Batangas sounds good, too. Better, even. More fresh air is always good.

"Okay."

So he turns right.

An hour later, the two of them stop by a convenience store to grab food and other necessities. Yoongi insists that he's going to pay for everything, and that Taehyung's only job is to drive.

"Why do you have so much money?"

"This is the money I saved for college," Yoongi replies, tossing him a look as he hands the one-thousand bill to the cashier. She takes it carefully, rubbing one of her eyes in evident exhaustion. "I'm not gonna need it anymore, really. I'm not going to university."

"What?" Taehyung inquires. "But... aren’t we going to that prestigious uni together?"

"My father said I can't," the other supplies, and Taehyung barely hears it. He grabs the paper pag of snacks and hugs it to his chest. Taehyung takes the water bottles. "Plus, this money isn't even enough for the tuition fee during the first semester. You know my family can't afford it like you can."

With those words, he walks ahead of Taehyung and places the bag of junk food on the backseat. Taehyung follows behind to do the same with the water bottles.

The words leave a mark on Taehyung. While driving, he thinks and he thinks and he thinks— and he realizes, shortly, that the reason Yoongi’s parents fought that morning was because they disagreed on whether they should allow Yoongi to go to the famed university. Yoongi’s mother is supportive, has always been; cheering her son on every chance she gets and always making sure that Yoongi is determined to achieve his dreams.

Yoongi’s father is a whole other story. He had a history of being quite cold, and Taehyung knows this from experience because he never once received any positive regard from the man. He loves his son, of course, but he doesn’t care for his emotions. He doesn’t believe in Yoongi’s talents, his skills. He doesn’t believe in Yoongi. He always tells him that he’s reaching too far.

But Taehyung knows that Yoongi has never reached too far. He’s almost always contented with what he has. He thanks everyone even for the smallest things, growing up without the same luxury that Taehyung had living with his grandmother. All he wants is a chance to prove himself and make use of his talents, but his father doesn’t allow him to.

He reaches for the stereo and turns it on, and the morning news is still blaring, but he doesn’t mind. Yoongi is quiet, staring out the window and sighing occasionally.

Taehyung can only look.

A few hours later, they're in a resort hotel somewhere in Laiya, Batangas.

Taehyung had managed to convince Yoongi that he should at least keep half of the money he saved.

"I'll pay for the lodging."

"Alright."

The two of them slept for the entire afternoon in their resort cabin after eating lunch at Jollibee.

It's late April and it's hot as fuck because the Philippines only has two seasons (ultra cold and ultra hot). The time is seven in the evening, and Yoongi is waiting for Taehyung to come out of the shower. When he does, he's half-naked and is drying his hair with a towel. Yoongi struggles not to stare. "Uhm, I'm guessing you want some explanations."

"Uh, yeah. About many things. Like how you've been ignoring me for almost ten months."

"Yeah, uh, that."

Yoongi takes Taehyung by the hand and they walk on the sand barefooted. There's no one in the beach besides the two of them, but a campfire is already made on the sand. Yoongi prepared for this conversation.

Taehyung stares at the flame, looking amused. "Was this what you did while I showered?"

"Uh-huh," Yoongi supplies. He's still dragging Taehyung by the hand, which he himself is trying hard not to think about.

Once the two of them reach the campfire, Yoongi sits Taehyung down on one of the mats he laid out on the sand. Taehyung still looks confused, and Yoongi is, too, especially about the fact that he's basically going to tell Taehyung everything.

If you're going to tell him everything, why did you waste time ignoring him?

Yoongi shakes the thought out of his head. He doesn't need internal conflicts at this point in time, when he and Taehyung are in some (not really) deserted beach together.

"So," he starts off, now feeling much more aware of how much bullshit he's about to spill from his mouth. "It's like this."

Taehyung looks at him intently through the explanation. He's hugging his knees, probably regretting his decision of wearing basketball shorts and cursing the cold winds.

So far, Yoongi's only been telling the truth. He starts with elaborating on his parents' situation. He tells Taehyung that they're probably going to get a divorce soon and that Yoongi is happy that he's nineteen because he doesn't need to be taken into custody by either parent. He tells Taehyung that the reason they fought was because they didn’t agree on sending Yoongi to the University of the Philippines. All of that is true. Until he gets to the explanation of why he avoided Taehyung for months.

"I... avoided you because... because I was trying to get over something that happened."

Taehyung raises his eyebrows in a manner that Yoongi doesn't know, which is a big statement because Yoongi knows almost everything about Taehyung. But he continues on with the bullshit he started telling, even if it is half true. It's way too late to go back now.

"Something happened last summer, and I just, you know," he proceeds to say, looking down at his fingernails and lowering his voice for effect. "I was shaken. And scared, and a little bitter. It was kinda hard, but I’m okay now.”

Taehyung looks like he just got slapped in the face. His eyes fluttered awake, much different from the very sleepy phase they were in just a while ago. Yoongi guesses that he was surprised by the... information he just digested.

Yoongi pats the sand beside him and bites his bottom lip gently before continuing, "besides, I wasn't really avoiding you. I was avoiding everyone."

So his half-bullshit, half-true story ends there. He just hopes Taehyung accepts it.

"Nn, okay." The boy replies, and sits Indian style on the mat. He makes circles on the sand with his index finger and doesn't look at Yoongi. "But I was hurt. I thought you hated me."

Ah, there it was. Yoongi knew that Taehyung would be hurt by what he did, especially because his 'reason' was so small compared to how much their friendship meant. And Yoongi doesn't really know what to say, as always. So he opts for a simple and soulful, "I'm sorry."

It's one of the truest things he's said today. He's sorry for many things, but he can't really say those things for now, so he went for a general apology.

He can't just face Taehyung in the middle of a deserted beach and say, hey best friend, I think you're more beautiful than any of the brightest stars. Sorry.

He can't just face Taehyung in the confines of their shared room and say, hey best friend, I can sleep so much better just listening to your breathing. Sorry.

Yoongi can't just face Taehyung and say, hey best friend, I'm in love with you. Sorry.

He's in love with his best friend. Way to be cliché and predictable, right? He had to be in love with one person in the world and it just had to be his best friend of ten years. He started feeling it in seventh grade, when he was just starting to grasp the idea of liking someone romantically. But he realized it fully almost three years later — tenth grade. They were sitting in Yoongi’s room to do homework and he found himself feeling so fond of the way Taehyung holds a pen.

His life hasn’t been the same since then.

Come twelfth grade, all Yoongi wanted to do every time he saw Taehyung was to pull him to a corner and kiss him. He wanted to tell Taehyung how much he drives Yoongi crazy. But he knows, knows inside of him that Taehyung doesn’t like him that way and he’s only going to ruin their friendship if he goes through with that plan.

So what did he decide to do? He decided to avoid the boy as much as he could. He stopped coming over to their house. He went out with his other friends and never spared Taehyung a look.

And it hurt to do that, but he can’t imagine how hurt Taehyung was. He would say ‘sorry’ to the boy a thousand times if he could.

Yoongi looks up at him and finds that the most beautiful boy in the world is already smiling at him, deep brown eyes looking like rare pieces of amber while reflecting the fire. He looks perfect, like always. And Yoongi missed being able to say that.

“Anyway,” Yoongi clears his throat and starts standing up, dusting away the sand from his pajama pants. He picks up the mat he laid on the sand and dusts it as well. Taehyung does the same with his. The air is getting colder. “We should head back and continue planning the trip in our cabin.”

“Mmhm.”

So the two of them walk back to their cabin, Taehyung's arm around Yoongi's shoulders, and Yoongi's arm around Taehyung's waist — right where they belong.

The next day rolls around and they still haven’t finalized their itinerary.

They wake up right before noon, Taehyung waking up first and spending time trying to wake Yoongi up. When nothing else works, he jumps onto him and screams in his ear. “Get up, I’m hungry!”

Yoongi groans and pushes Taehyung off. Taehyung laughs at this. The sunlight is pouring in through the windows and the two electric fans in the room are whirring like crazy, but it feels right. They’re back to being best friends. Yoongi is laughing, too. Everything is in balance once again.

“Put some pants on, you rascal,” Yoongi shouts after the laughing fit ends. He’s still smiling, though, and it makes him look younger than he actually is. He looks like he wasn’t just crying about his parents yesterday, and Taehyung is glad. Yoongi is happy and he likes that. “We can’t go out for breakfast if you’re just in your boxers.”

Taehyung shrugs and smugly says, “You never know, Yoon, what if people in Batangas just don’t give a shit about pants? I know I don’t.”

“Well, Tae, if that’s true you’re still not from Batangas and neither am I, so we have to care about pants. Especially because Mang Inasal is just a ten-minute drive away.”

And Taehyung gives up the fight, because he is too weak for Mang Inasal. He picks up his pants which were previously laying on the floor and starts putting them on. Yoongi is staring at him while he does this, and when Taehyung sees, he winks.

Yoongi hides in his blanket. “It’s too early in the morning for this.”

“It’s actually almost noon, but you do you, Yoon. You do you.”

Eventually, Taehyung puts his pants on properly and and Yoongi offers to drive. Apparently, he knows the way because he researched it the night before. Taehyung sits in the passenger seat while scrolling on his phone, ocassionally showing pictures of his latest artworks to Yoongi. The road isn’t busy because they’re in a pretty secluded area, so he gets to look at the pictures longer than he needs.

Taehyung shows him one painting that catches his attention more than the other ones. It’s ultimately different to any artwork of Taehyung’s that he’d seen in his lifetime, using watercolor instead of oil paint. It’s a portrait of a boy, but with half of his face obscured by pale blue smoke. Vaguely, it reminds Yoongi of Taehyung himself; with lovely sun-kissed brushstrokes that is exactly the shade of Taehyung’s skin. The background is a pale purple.

“What’s that called?”

Taehyung smiles and says, “Stigma.”

They’re in the parking lot of Mang Inasal, almost full because it’s lunch time and any sane person would want to chew on Mang Inasal’s delicious chicken barbecue rather than lonely chicken fillets by an unnamed fast food company. Yoongi parks the car in an empty space right next to a white Mercedes. He notices that its tires are slashed, but doesn’t dwell too much on it.

Once the two of them get out of the car, Yoongi tosses Taehyung his keys and they make their way to the entrance. The guard greets them politely and they greet back. They fall in line behind a rich-looking couple.

“You gonna get the usual?” Taehyung asks him as he fishes his wallet out from the back pocket of his jeans. Yoongi smacks his hand and takes out his own wallet to give Taehyung a 500-peso bill. Taehyung grabs it, but doesn’t accept it. He looks like he’s taking Yoongi’s money away so that he can use his own money, which is confusing. Then again, Taehyung has been confusing Yoongi a lot these days. “Why do you still insist on paying for everything, Gi?”

“Because I dragged you into this trip, and I don’t want you to feel burdened in any way.”

And that’s true. He doesn’t want to burden Taehyung, because he planned everything and basically just hauled Taehyung in it. The fact that he accompanied Yoongi and drove all the way from Manila to San Juan in Batangas is enough. All he wants is to unwind, and additionally, for Taehyung to enjoy the ‘unplanned’ trip he got pulled into.

But clearly, Taehyung has other plans. He crosses his arms dismissively and says, “I’m not going to use this bill unless you declare that this meal is a date.”

“Taehyung—”

“Just kidding!” Taehyung exclaims right after, laughing hysterically. Yoongi feels like he’s about to combust, and hopes that the boy doesn’t notice. “Fine, you pay for our lunch. But just today. And I’m going to order a lot as a form of revenge. That’s what you get for not letting me pay; you know that I never back down when it comes to Mang Inasal.”

Yoongi sighs (in relief, mostly) and rolls his eyes. He just nods at Taehyung, who smiles smugly. The rich couple in front of them are ordering now, so he nudges the boy and says he’s going to sit on one of the booths. “You know what I want, right?”

Taehyung raises his brows multiple times to confirm that, and Yoongi is set on his way to the newly-empty booth right beside the big windows. He sits and pulls out his phone as the table gets cleaned. He taps on his notes and sees the to-do list he typed on it last night with the help of Taehyung. It’s not an itinerary, but nonetheless, they planned what they’re going to do for the next day and it’s better than nothing.

Itinerary

• Go out for lunch tomorrow
• Swim, or just chill in the beach
• Drive to Lipa City
• Do whatever

Yoongi sighs at the ‘do whatever’ part. He looks over at Taehyung from across the restaurant, and he’s now telling the lady at the counter their orders. He looks so expressive and lively, and his energy is very visibly affecting the lady. It’s amazing that Taehyung still has that effect on people, after so many years. He’s like a ball of positive vibes. People around him start smiling when they see him smile. That’s probably why everyone naturally gravitates towards him — he gives off sunshine like he’s the sun itself.

Yoongi sighs again. He shouldn’t be thinking like this anymore, especially when he went on this trip specifically to unwind and at least try to forget about his feelings for Taehyung.

Obviously, Taehyung himself isn’t helping. He’s really out there being handsome and lovable, and Yoongi is so soft for the boy it’s unbelievable.

Before he gets caught staring, he shakes his head and goes back to looking at his phone. He decides that actually researching about the next city they’re going to will be really useful, so he does that. He’s never been to Batangas before, so of course he’s surprised at what he sees. Apparently, Lipa is famous for its churches. Well, that’s good to know, so he puts the famous San Sebastian Cathedral on the list.

Just as he was about to check on Taehyung, the boy takes the seat across from him, holding their number. “What are you doing, Yoon?”

“I was researching about Lipa,” he responds.

Taehyung slaps the table lightly, effectively getting Yoongi’s attention. He points a finger gun at Yoongi and says, “You have to put Casa de Segunda on our list of destinations.”

Yoongi’s eyes widen at the implication. “Is that in Lipa?” He questions, more to himself than his companion. He re-opens the browser on his phone and googles Casa de Segunda, and surely, the Wikipedia page says that it’s in Lipa. He slaps the table like Taehyung previously did. “We’re going there. We totally are, right?”

“Yep. So put it on the list. Immediately.”

Yoongi does exactly that.

• Casa de Segunda

He feels a goofy smile coming on. He loves hearing about Casa de Segunda. One of his classmates who was from Batangas told him all about it during his first year in senior high school, and he’s been in love with it since. “I can’t believe I’m finally going to that house,” he finds himself saying. Yoongi looks up from his phone and sees that Taehyung is staring at him with a matching smile. “What?”

“Nothing,” Taehyung says, looking away. He leans back on his seat, trying to contain his smile. But it fails. He’s smiling (grinning, more like) and trying not to look at Yoongi. Yoongi, on the other hand, is unamused.

He pouts. “What is it?”

“Ah, Gi-gi, I just really missed you,” the boy replies. He’s finally looking at Yoongi, and he has a fond expression on his face. “My one and only history nerd.”

Yoongi tries hard not to blush at that. See? Clearly, Taehyung is not helping with this whole ‘moving on’ thing. Yoongi is fucked and he doesn’t know what to do about it.

Thankfully, their order arrives and a friendly-looking waiter enumerates it pointlessly. Yoongi knows exactly what Taehyung ordered for him. It’s a PM1.5 — Spicy Paa, with unlimited rice and iced tea as a drink. He also ordered palabok, which the two of them will share. Taehyung meanwhile ordered bangus sisig for himself. It’s been their Mang Inasal order since they entered junior high school, when they finally had enough allowance to go on their own food escapades.

The waiter leaves and Yoongi is left staring at the large halo-halo that Taehyung apparently ordered. “Is... this what you meant when you said you were going to order a lot?”

Taehyung nods.

“Whatever, then,” Yoongi says dismissively. He grabs the spoon and fork nearest to him and utters a quick prayer. He may be unreligious, but if there’s one thing he knows about food, it’s that you always have to be thankful that it’s there for you to satisfy your needs. “Let’s eat.”

Taehyung gives him a thumbs-up, and the two of them eat their breakfast slash lunch, happily chatting away and sharing their food with each other. Once again, they’re back to their old habits. Taehyung still pours chicken oil on his rice like his life depended on it. Yoongi still mixes soy sauce and vinegar to make adobo-tasting sauce for his chicken. It’s like nothing happened.

And it’ll stay like this if Yoongi doesn’t do or say anything stupid.

(He doesn’t intend to.)

They finish their meal about an hour later, and they decide to go back to the car. The white Mercedes is still there, Yoongi notices, and he now knows that all of the tires are slashed. That’s unfortunate, he thinks, but it’s none of his business. The car’s windows are also smashed, which is a strange thing, considering that the body is fine and all pristinely white. Well, whoever owns that car would not be happy.

Just before opening the passenger door (Taehyung said he’s going to drive), he hears heeled shoes clacking on the asphalt of the parking ground. There’s a woman who’s running towards the white car, and she’s wearing a grey turtleneck and black skinny jeans. She is also wearing what seem to be at least five-inch high stiletto pumps. How she can run while wearing them, Yoongi doesn’t know.

The woman groans in irritation when she gets close enough to see the tires. “Why did it have to be the tires?”

Taehyung is watching her through the driver’s seat mirror. Yoongi gets in the passenger seat and taps his shoulder. “We should go,” he says, taking out his phone and taking a look at his notes again. While enjoying the meal, they’ve decided that after completing their stay at the beach resort, they’re going to San Sebastian Cathedral and Casa de Segunda. After that, they’re off to Taal.

“Do you think we should help her?” The other boy asks. Yoongi shrugs. At this, Taehyung rolls the window down and pokes his head out. The woman is sitting on the hood of the Mercedes now, seeming exasperated. “Excuse me, miss, are you okay?”

She sighs and hugs her clutch tighter to her chest. “Yeah, thanks for asking. Why?”

“Well, uh, your car,” Taehyung answers. He observes the car a bit more and notices that even the side-mirror has been damaged. “Who did that?”

“Just some sickos who apparently hate my guts. Don’t worry, I’m used to this,” she says. She’s also typing something on her phone while saying this.

To Taehyung, she looks vaguely familiar, and that’s strange because he’s sure that he doesn’t know her. Her hair is black and the wind is sweeping it to the side. Her skin is tanned, too. Taehyung wonders even more. He also kind of recognizes her body shape — and not in the bad, nasty way. “Wait, aren’t you that swimmer...?”

She halts the vigorous typing she’s been doing on her phone and narrows her eyes at Taehyung. “You know me?”

“I think I do, actually,” Taehyung replies. He narrows his eyes too, for effect, probably. “But I’m not sure. Will you tell me?”

“I’m Iya Flores, Olympic swimmer. And this,” she pats her car, like she’s comforting it, “is what some people like to do just because they hate seeing a woman drive an expensive ‘man’ car.”

A few minutes later, they find themselves driving Iya to her hotel. She’s in the backseat, looking bored as she stares out the window. Earlier, she’d seemed fiery and alive, but now her tiredness is visible.

“Uhm, what did you say your name was again?” She asks, peering in between the front seats to look at Taehyung.

Taehyung doesn’t take his eyes off the road. Yoongi gives him a quick sideways glance. “My name’s Vincent Kim. Real name Taehyung Kim, but my confirmation name is Vincent and most people call me that.”

“Oh, you didn’t tell me your surname earlier. Are you guys Korean?”

“Yeah. We’ve been in the Philippines for a long time, though. We both grew up here.” Yoongi answers when Taehyung is too busy taking a U-turn to respond. “You can call me August if you want, because it’s my confirmation name, but my Korean name is easy to pronounce. It’s Yoongi. Yoongi Min.”

Iya makes an affirmative noise, nodding and leaning back. “I actually studied a bit of Korean because I used to have a Korean coach, so don’t worry. I can at least pronounce your names right. How old are you two, then?”

“I turned 19 this March. Taehyung is 18.” Yoongi provides.

“Oh.” Iya nods in understanding. “I’m actually 22. Why do I feel like you two are more in control of your lives than I’m in control of mine? That’s unfair!” She jokes, whining the last part as she crosses her legs in the spacious backseat.

Taehyung laughs. “Don’t worry about it. We grew up independent is all.”

Yoongi snorts at the insinuation. Him and Taehyung? In control of their lives? Independent? What did Taehyung eat in Mang Inasal to be able to say that? Sure, they were independent from their parents, but they aren’t independent from each other. He knows that sometimes he can’t decide on things without the other’s opinion or help. They grew up together, did most things together, and that’s not bad at all.

But Yoongi knows that because of that, it’s going to be hard for the both of them to adjust without each other in the future. If the months that he didn’t talk to Taehyung made him learn something, it’s that he’s so used to doing everything with his best friend that it feels foreign doing anything without him.

The three of them are exchanging Messenger IDs and numbers when Taehyung points out that he can see the brass lettering of the name of Iya’s hotel. Just a few minutes later, Iya is saying goodbye after a pretty informative chat in the car. Before she closes the car door, she thanks both of them and says, “I’ll pay you two back someday, just wait for it.”

They watch as she enters the lobby, smiling at the bellman and making her way deeper in the hotel.

Yoongi lets out a sigh. “So?”

“Back to the resort, then off to Lipa!” Taehyung exclaims.

Taehyung is zipping up his bag when he hears a knock on the door. But it’s two in the afternoon and Yoongi is currently in the shower, so he doesn’t know who’s knocking.

He opens the door carefully and is met with Iya, with hair in a Dutch braid and wearing thick eyeglasses. He probably wouldn’t recognize her if she didn’t carry that clutch she also carried earlier.

“Ms. Iya, what are you doing here?”

She frowns. “Didn’t Yoongi tell you?”

At that moment, Yoongi comes out of the bathroom, drying his hair with a towel. He’s (thankfully) fully-dressed, wearing a plain white shirt and black ripped jeans. When he sees Iya waving at him from the outside the door, he jumps. “I didn’t think you’d be here so soon.”

Taehyung raises his eyebrows at Yoongi. “What is this conspiracy I don’t know about?”

“We didn’t conspire against you.” Iya explains, letting herself in. She sits on one of the beds and makes herself comfortable. She looks around and nods to herself, as if approving the appearance of the small room. “Why didn’t you tell him, Yoongi?”

The glance Taehyung throws at Yoongi is everything but gentle. He’s squinting at the other boy, probably accusing him of something bad.

“Hey, for your information, I was showering when you texted me. So I couldn’t tell him right away,” Yoongi protests. Iya hums in response. He puts the towel he used for drying his hair in a clear plastic bag, tucking it away with the rest of his things. “Why don’t you just explain it to Taehyung yourself?”

“Alright then,” she answers, clearing her throat before beginning, “Taehyung, I am here as your tour guide during your Batangas Province vacation.”

“But—”

“No buts. My car has been taken care of by the insurance company and I was informed by Yoongi here that your final destination is Taal, which is my hometown, so this benefits both me and you guys. I accompany you across Batangas Province, and you drop me off at Taal because my car is away for the time being, and then you both drive away back to the Manila Bay sunset. It’s perfect.”

Taehyung puts his hands on his hips. “Are you sure you’re okay with that?”

“You see, Taehyung,” Iya delivers, “I was the one who suggested this. I’m totally fine with it. I like sightseeing and I know Batangas like the back of my hand. This is also my way of saying thank you after what you did for me today.”

They all go quiet. Taehyung looks over to Yoongi, who’s quite busy trying to fit sneakers in his backpack. Both he and Iya are looking at him, and when Yoongi notices this, he glares at them.

So Taehyung clears his throat and turns back to Iya. “Okay, uhm, did you pack stuff with you?”

“Yep. It’s being guarded by the front office staff.”

Yoongi zips up his backpack, finally able to fit the shoes into it. “Let’s just go. San Juan to Lipa would take about two hours, and it’d be best for us to get there before it’s dark.” He looks at his wristwatch and points out, “It’s two-thirty. Come on.”

Iya promptly stands up from the bed and marches over to the door with a satisfied face. “Let’s go.”

Almost two hours later, they’re on the road and Iya is asleep in the backseat, snoring with her face covered by a book. She’s sleeping soundly — literally, emitting a lot of sounds with her continuous and rhythmic snoring. It’s almost four in the afternoon and they’re close to Lipa. Taehyung’s a little sleepy too and he thinks his butt is going numb, but that’s fine because there are only a few kilometers left until they reach the city.

Meanwhile, Yoongi is in the passenger seat, scrolling away on his phone. He’s been mostly quiet throughout the ride, entertaining Iya’s questions when Taehyung can’t do it, and napping. He’s a light sleeper, though, and he can’t really sleep with all the road sounds and the constant car horns going off. So all he’s doing is going through his phone’s IMPORTANT folder, which contains many things associated with Taehyung.

“Yoon, what are you doing?”

Taehyung’s voice startles him, and he quickly hits the home button to hide what he was doing. “Nothing, it’s just, I’m trying to think of what we should do in, uh, Taal,” he reasons. It’s probably not a good lie and Taehyung probably saw what he was actually doing, but he says it anyway.

However, Taehyung seems unbothered. “All I know about Taal is the volcano,” he says, eyes not leaving the road as he turns the steering wheel. “We should just ask Iya. She knows what to do in Taal.”

“You’re right,” Yoongi replies, trying to ignore the intense beating of his heart. It’s fucking stupid and he thought he was over this, but he still thinks Taehyung looks hot while driving. That’s why he’s been quiet in the car. He’s trying to not look at his best friend, who right now is sporting a serious face as he looks at the road. Yoongi knows that this is basically what he signed up for when he asked Taehyung to go on a trip with him, but he doesn’t know what to do.

Yoongi sighs. He’s hopeless.

Iya is stretching in the backseat when he turns to look at her. She yawns a little and slaps herself awake. “This is Lipa now, right?” She asks, blinking away the sleep in her eyes. The book that was on her face earlier is now on her lap, and Yoongi recognizes it as An Abundance of Katherines by John Green, which is quite funny because he didn’t see Iya as someone who would read John Green books.

Taehyung gives Iya a quick glance by looking at the rear-view mirror. “Yeah, I saw the arc earlier. It said ‘Welcome to Lipa City’ so I think this is Lipa now.”

“Well then!” She cheers, peering out the window and looking at the surroundings. “We’re in Barangay Antipolo, guys. There’s this really beautiful and big church here called Our Lady of Mount Carmel Church. You guys wanna go and see?”

“My butt could use a break, I guess.” Taehyung jokes. He looks at Yoongi then, smiling. “You wanna go, Yoongs?”

Yoongi nods. His butt does feel a little numb after sitting for so long. “Yeah,” he confirms, cracking his knuckles and taking a look at Iya. “We should go.”

And so Iya points out the church when they reach it, and Taehyung parks his car in the designated parking area. It’s late afternoon, so the sun is the radiating the perfect kind of warmth. The trees in the church premises are imposing, too, like they were planted all those years ago with love and adoration. They block just enough sunlight to make the patio a comfortable walking area.

“It was rumored that the Virgin Mary showed herself to a nun in here and talked to her,” Iya sighs out, looking around fondly. “People from all over the country celebrated it every 12^th of September in here, you know, but now the Catholic Church categorizes it as a hoax so no one celebrates it anymore.”

Taehyung tilts his head to the side slightly. The wind catches on his air, and Yoongi thinks he looks gorgeous like this. Pondering. “That’s a little sad.”

“Well, are you guys going in?” Iya probes, and starts going up on the steps toward the church doors.

The two of them share a look, and nod.

When they crashed at their brand new hotel room, it’s almost seven in the evening. They’ve explored a church and Casa de Segunda in the short time they had. Yoongi is so tired that he lets himself fall on the bed face-first and just stays like that for a while. He almost falls asleep while wearing his shoes. Taehyung laughs at him for this, slapping his back multiple times to convince him that taking off his shoes is worth it.

The two of them showered, Taehyung first and Yoongi next. When Yoongi came out of the bathroom, he sees that Taehyung has turned on the TV and is watching the news. He is also shirtless, since he sleeps shirtless sometimes and apparently  this is one of those times. “You were so cute at Casa de Segunda, Yoon. I took lots of pictures of you with your mouth open while looking at a chess table.”

“I was looking at a part of history, Tae. Jose Rizal himself used to play chess on that table, used to sit on those chairs. It’s amazing.”

“Yeah, it was interesting that we literally went to the house of Rizal’s first love,” Taehyung answers, yawning before continuing, “I mean, imagine if that happened to the person whose first love is me. That person is a national hero, for example, so people would go to my house and the only things they’d find are paintbrushes, or like, my collection of broken pencils. Or maybe my Pokémon card collection. And they’d think it’s historical.”

Yoongi is too tired to respond to that, and at the same time too scared to do so. It’s weird to hear the words ‘first love’ from Taehyung’s mouth. And he doesn’t know, but he just indirectly referred to Yoongi. So he hums instead of forming coherent words as an answer.

“Iya was good company, too,” Taehyung rambles on. “I’m glad we have someone who knows almost everything about where we’re going. It makes stuff easier.”

Yoongi nods. He’s not nearly awake enough to deal with how stunning Taehyung looks in the dimmed lights, so he lies down on the bed with a sigh. He watches as the other boy gets up from his bed and trudges towards the large window, drawing aside the drapes and finding a dark sky, the stars visible enough because of the very little light pollution in the eco-friendly city. Taehyung smiles at what he sees, like he has fond memories of the stars.

And maybe he does. Maybe Taehyung has fond memories of the stars because he was once one of them; maybe he was once a star, bright and beautiful and warm, something that lights up even the darkest nights, something so radiant that Yoongi can’t touch for more than a few seconds because he would then go up in flames.

Taehyung turns back to gaze at him. “Don’t you wanna look at the stars?”

“I don’t need to,” Yoongi replies.

He doesn’t know how to tell the boy that he’s contented just looking at the brightest star in his universe — Taehyung Kim.

Iya comes knocking on their door at six in the morning, already dressed for the next destinations that she promised to list down the night before. Yoongi’s the one who opens the door for her, and he notices a bunch of stuff. She’s smiling, but her eyes are red and he’s pretty sure she’s been crying. She’s also holding a handkerchief, and it’s wet, which further confirms his suspicions.

“Are you okay?” Is the first thing he says to her, and she just nods, biting her lip and trying to keep her tears at bay.

She clutches the handkerchief tightly in her right hand. “I-Is it that obvious?” She asks, voice ragged while attempting to laugh it off. Yoongi nods silently. Now he’s sure that she’s been crying, and she was probably crying all night too, judging from the bags that are now under her eyes.  But he’s always been pretty shitty at comforting people, so he doesn’t exactly know what to do. Iya seems to get this. She doesn’t look like she wanted Yoongi to comfort her anyway. “Uhm, I prepared our schedule for today. I’m going to get breakfast alone, uh, l-let’s just meet here at eight. Is that okay?”

“Yeah. That’s fine, thank you.” He responds, but it feels incomplete, so he adds, “are you sure you’re going to be okay alone?”

Iya nods, closing her eyes for a moment and sniffing. “Thank you for asking. Go wake up Taehyung now.”

And with that, she walks away, and Yoongi watches as she walks across the hallway to get to the elevator. He closes the door quietly then, and treads towards the windows to draw the drapes and let some sunshine in. Taehyung, while sleeping, is still as gorgeous as ever. His face is being illuminated by the rays of light that are now shining through the window, making him look even more ethereal.

Taehyung’s phone rings just then—his alarm, probably—and the boy immediately sits up on the bed, grabbing his phone from the floor and turning off the alarm. “Good morning, sunshine,” Yoongi greets him cheerfully. “The sun is here to take you. It says you’re its son.”

The boy yawns and stretches his arms above his head. “Morning, Gi. I am the sun’s son, thank you very much. I am very bright and warm just like my mother.”

“Right,” Yoongi laughs, wondering where he got the confidence to say that sun thing to Taehyung. He blames it on the sun itself. (Damn you, sun, for making Yoongi Min so soft and warm all of a sudden.) “You have to wake up. We need to get breakfast before eight, and it’s six-twenty already.”

He lets Taehyung shower first, and he takes the time to prepare what he’s going to bring today. Iya texted him their schedule and apparently they’re going to a nearby church first, and then the mall, and lastly an orchard. They’re pretty much packed.

August Min
btw iya are you alright?? uh do yu maybe wanna talk about it

 iya s. flores
Yeah I’m fine, its fine. I just received some bad news last night. Don’t worry abt it dude 

August Min
how bad?
it’s ok if you dont wanna tell me
i just wanna make sure you’re okay 

iya s. flores
It wasn’t that bad, just enough to make me sad
Youre a good guy, Yoongi. Im fine now tho, don’t worry :)

Taehyung gets out of the shower wearing his glasses (peculiar, considering that he’s had contacts for the past two years) and gestures for Yoongi to get in, so he does, leaving his charging phone on the nightstand. He grabs his clothes that are sitting on his bed and dashes into the bathroom. When he gets out, their beds have been made, and Taehyung is fiddling with his car keys. The drapes are back to their initial position, blocking the sunlight because the rays are getting too hot and Taehyung knows that Yoongi doesn’t like high temperatures.

Yoongi rubs his hair with the bath towel. He gets a sudden thought and looks at Taehyung, “where do you wanna get breakfast?”

“Apparently the buffet downstairs is open now. The housekeeper who came in said it opens at seven, so I think we should just get breakfast there.”

He nods. “Yeah, let’s do that.”

By eight-thirteen, they’re all back in Taehyung’s car. Iya seems calmer now, but she’s too quiet. She keeps staring out the window and sighing to herself.

Yoongi looks at her. Whatever she’s going through must be tough, yet she still made sure to prepare their itinerary for today. She texted it to him earlier, and by the looks of it, they’re going to have a long day.

• San Sebastian Cathedral
• Explore the town
• Go for lunch
• Rest!
• Marian Orchard

“The cathedral is pretty close to where we are right now, so I put it first.” Iya’s voice startles Yoongi. He wasn’t expecting her to speak up because of her current state, but now she’s trying to smile at him. She reaches over to Taehyung on the driver’s seat and whispers, “Turn on your GPS, my voice is too hoarse to give you directions.”

Taehyung nods.

Soon, they find themselves near a plaza. There stands a statue, bronze and glinting in the daylight. They learn that it’s called Plaza Independencia, and the statue there is Jose Rizal. They’re apparently in the middle of the city, and that’s obvious because of the heavy traffic in the wide roads. It’s littered with so many different establishments that Yoongi can’t keep up.

Iya sniffs, then clears her throat. “The cathedral is right beside the plaza. You should turn left.”

The church is remarkable. The ceilings are full of fresco paintings that resemble the ones in Rome, the ones that Michaelangelo himself summoned from his paintbrush to decorate the famous Sistine. Taehyung looks around, jaw slacking in awe. The altar in the very front looks lavish, too, reflecting the lights from all the huge chandeliers surrounding the entire cathedral.

Taehyung is absolutely dazzling against the golden atmosphere of the church. Yoongi can’t help but stare at the boy, completely fond.

And apparently, this fondness is evident in his face, because“mind-blowing, isn’t it?” Iya teases, nudging him slightly. She smiles knowingly when Yoongi stops staring at Taehyung to look at her, and he clears his throat, trying to suppress the incoming blush. She chuckles. “You look at him like he’s some kind of art piece.”

“I do not. He’s... my friend,” he trails off. And really, what excuse does he have? None. He does look at Taehyung like he’s a piece of art; too pretty to be touched, too easy to damage with one wrong move. Looking at Taehyung is the only thing he can do, so that’s all he does. He can’t afford to destroy what they have.

Iya crosses her arms above her chest. “Yeah, he’s your friend,” she replies. Her voice is unintendedly gruff, so she clears her throat before adding, “but you’re like... in love with him, aren’t you?”

There’s a certain look in her eyes that Yoongi can’t seem to decipher. It’s like she wants to tell him something important, but has chosen not to just for the sake of it. He doesn’t like that, but he keeps his mouth shut. So he looks back at the other boy, who is still marveling at everything the cathedral can offer to his artistic mind.

“Well, I’m not planning on doing anything about it.” He sighs out.

She shakes her head, but drops the topic right after. She darts her eyes around the church and asks, “Do you play the piano?”

He nods. Iya nods back like she already knew the answer. She then proceeds to pull him by the arm to the front part of the cathedral, where Taehyung is also headed. They’re getting closer and closer to the altar, but what catches his eye is the huge pipe organ in the right wing. It’s designed like the ones in Europe, ones that Yoongi has only seen in pictures during his musical history classes.

“This shit’s fucking pretty,” he breathes out.

Iya slaps his arm gently. “You’re literally in a church, Yoongi. Watch your language, will you?”

“God doesn’t care if I swear. This organ is the most beautiful treasure that I’ve laid my eyes on, and I need to express that—”

“More beautiful than Taehyung?”

He closes his mouth. Iya starts laughing loudly, but she covers her mouth before she can continue. She still laughs, though, directly on her palm.

Yoongi thinks of a comeback. He isn’t stocked with any at the moment and the girl caught him unawares, so he has to think before he responds. “You discovered my embarrassing crush on my best friend literally one minute ago and you’re already teasing me like I’m that whipped for him. I see how it is.” He whispers when he finally finds the words he was looking for.

“Don’t be such a killjoy. I know how that feels,” she whispers back at him, grabbing him by the arm and pulling him towards the nearby set of pews, where Taehyung is sitting quietly and praying.

Iya doesn’t elaborate on what she said, so Yoongi shrugs it off, though it did make him a little curious.

Taehyung looks at peace, eyes closed and mumbling a prayer that Yoongi doesn’t recognize.

Directly in front of the church is a small Chinese-owned department store, filled to the brim with the cutesy low-priced stuff that Yoongi knows has been Taehyung’s guilty pleasure since elementary school. There are baby pink tumblers, notebooks, pens, and other shit that everyone finds cute and affordable.

Taehyung squeals at one particularly cute bootleg Care Bear plush. Iya joins in and the two of them curse at Yoongi for not appreciating the cute bear.

Yoongi later learns that the Care Bear’s name is Share Bear after a few persuasions from Taehyung and Iya to look it up using his data plan. They apparently both had the purple bear as their favorite during their childhood days, but have forgotten its name because of how much time had passed.

“Share Bear is a pretty shitty name for a bear.” Yoongi remarks, shoving his phone back in his pocket.

“The disrespect!” Taehyung hollers, dramatically putting a hand on his chest and actually looking offended at his statement. “You clearly don’t know how important Share Bear is. Without her, no one in the world would know how to share, and we’d fall into endless darkness because we’re all stingy little shits.”

Yoongi grins. “Whatever. We all know Bedtime Bear is superior.”

“Why have useless Care Bears discourse when we can just buy the damn bear?” Iya comments, already grabbing said purple bear and looking at the attached price tag. “It says 450 pesos for three. This is basically a message from the gods that we should buy some.”

Iya insists that she’ll pay for it, and Yoongi’s about to protest when he remembers that she’s rich, drives a Mercedes, and probably gets even more money from various sponsors, so he stops. (Sometimes he still needs to take advantage of the fact that he has rich people in his life. You can’t blame him.)

So now, while walking towards the exit, Yoongi carries three bears: Share Bear, Grumpy Bear, and Bedtime Bear. They’ve all been paid for, but they’re not in a bag because apparently the entire city has stopped using plastic bags years ago; he’s just carrying them in his arms like he’s their father. He loves them.

Iya is walking ahead of them and is busy tapping away on her phone with a serious face. Taehyung sidles up beside him and carefully takes Grumpy Bear out of his hands. Yoongi admires the way he looks at the plush as if it were an old friend. “I like Grumpy Bear a lot.”

The three of them are outside the store now, under the scorching Batangueño sun. “I thought you liked Share Bear,” Yoongi replies, stroking the small embroidery on the stomach of the purple bear. It’s of two lollipops with hearts, crossed together to make a sharing gesture.

“Well, yeah, I did like Share Bear. But I think I forgot about Grumpy Bear.” The younger defends himself. “Actually, I think he was my real favorite, I just forgot he existed for a while because I haven’t seen the show in years. I do like Share Bear, though, I promise,” he says, hugging the bear to his chest.

Yoongi nods, and Taehyung pats the bear’s nose with his index finger. “You know, I think Grumpy Bear’s a little bit like you,” he mumbles next. Yoongi’s about to ask why when Iya suddenly stops.

They’re following where she’s going, so when she stops, they stop too. She faces them as she tucks her phone back in her pocket. “Can we stop by this McDonald’s for a bit? I need to use the comfort room.”

“Yeah,” Taehyung answers. The aforementioned McDonald’s is right beside the department store anywhere, so it’s not like it’s a long walk. “Go ahead. I think I need some ice cream to keep myself from combusting anyway. It’s hot.”

Iya snorts. “Get me a McFloat while you’re at it, okay?”

“Noted, ma’am.”

She makes her way to the comfort rooms in the corner of the restaurant, and Taehyung pulls Yoongi by the arm towards the counter. He orders a McFloat and two hot fudge sundaes without asking if Yoongi wants one. He just knows. Yoongi notices that Taehyung’s still holding Grumpy Bear in his left hand. The blue bear is dangling by its feet and its trademark scowl is prominent on its face, and he thinks of what Taehyung said about how Grumpy Bear is a little bit like him.

Before he knows it, Taehyung has already handed his own money to the cashier. Yoongi slaps his back lightly and says, “I told you I’m paying for everything.”

“Ow! Hey, you let Iya pay.”

“She’s older and richer than me.”

“I’m richer than you, too,” he retorts, swinging the blue bear at Yoongi’s face. “Just let me pay for whatever I wanna pay for. You can exploit me whenever you want—”

“Don’t use that word,” Yoongi grimaces.

“Fine. You can abuse my wealth—”

“Even worse.”

The cashier comes back with their order and places it on their tray, looking at them weirdly. “Here’s your receipt, sir.”

Taehyung replies with a ‘thank you’ and a beaming smile, letting Yoongi take Grumpy Bear from him so he can hold the tray. They sit at an empty booth opposite of each other, and just then Iya comes out of the comfort room. She spots them quickly and walks over to them, clutching her phone. “You actually got me a float!” She exclaims, looking surprised, and sits next to Yoongi.

“Well, anything for the Banyo Queen.” Taehyung snickers.

“Banyo Queen? What the fuck, Taehyung,” she sputters, kicking his legs under the table. Yoongi laughs at the implication. He’d been an avid listener of Andrew E’s music when he was younger, and the song Banyo Queen is a song about a woman with... questionable interests, so to speak. It’s a classic.

When Yoongi says classic, he means this:

They’re in ninth grade. It’s considered free period because their music teacher is too busy chatting away with other teachers in the faculty room, and their classmates are just doing whatever there is to do. Yoongi brought his guitar with him because of a scheduled group performance during this class, but since Mrs. Pagcaliwangan isn’t available at the moment, they’re just in the back portion in the room while singing random songs.

Yoongi is sitting on the arm of an armchair while Taehyung sits on the chair itself, keeping Yoongi from falling. Yoongi is strumming his guitar mindlessly.

“When are you playing Wonderwall agai—”

“I played it for you one time and that’s it.”

Taehyung groans. “Look, despite the sappiness of the song, it’s pretty good and calming. People only hate it because there’s always that one guy who covers it every single time someone asks him to cover something on guitar. Besides, the lyricism? It’s top-notch.”

Yoongi gives him a look.

“Okay, fine, well,” Taehyung pokes on his left thigh playfully, “why don’t you play another song for me? I promise it’s not Wonderwall.”

Yoongi narrows his eyes at him. “I don’t know how to play Doris Day or Frank Sinatra songs.”

“You think I would ask you to play My Way or something?” The younger asks, bewildered. He pinches Yoongi’s thigh and relishes in the yelp he gets. “I’m requesting Andrew E, Banyo Queen.”

He tilts his head to the side, trying to picture the chords in his head. Yoongi studied this song because it was a must in learning fingerstyle guitar and also because Andrew E is one of the pioneers of Philippine rap. The intro rolls off of his fingertips easily as he plucks the guitar, and one by one their classmates start clapping along to make a recognizable beat. Taehyung starts the first verse, trying to copy the rapper’s iconic voice and intonation. It makes everyone laugh.

Yoongi smiles fondly as he listens to the younger butcher the lyrics. Taehyung doesn’t have the song memorized, that’s for sure, but their classmates’ voices singing along with them create a good harmony; the camaraderie makes it even better. “When the night has come, at pinatay ang ilaw, oh madalas, lumalabas, banyo queen,” they sing the chorus. “Oh darling, darling stand by me, o-oh stand by me, oh madalas, lumalabas, banyo queen.”

Taehyung is smiling, and Yoongi loves it.

It’s a classic.

“Do you guys wanna keep exploring the town?” Iya says, swirling her straw around the ice cream on her float. The question breaks Yoongi’s musings. “I suggested special Batangas goto for lunch, but are you guys down for that?”

Taehyung perks up. “Actually, I have never tried goto before. Ever.”

“Really? God, you haven’t lived until you’ve had goto, Taehyung.” Iya continues. “Especially authentic Batangueño goto. It’s the best. I know a place right in the middle of the market. It serves the most famous goto in Lipa and it’s definitely something to try.”

“Oh, I’m down,” Taehyung replies. “Yoongi, you too?”

Yoongi nods. He’s eaten goto before, of course, on multiple occasions. But he knows that the province is famous for it, too, which means it probably tastes better than the goto in Manila that he’s gotten used to.

They go back to the parking to drop off the Care Bears in Taehyung’s car. After that, they keep exploring the town and end up in the marketplace, still not too far away from the cathedral they visited earlier. It isn’t exactly ergonomic to use Taehyung’s car in the narrow streets that became narrower because it’s full of vendors, so it’s still parked near the cathedral. They walk.

And walk.

And walk.

And Yoongi, sweet Yoongi who was not thinking at all, makes a mistake.

He holds Taehyung’s hand.

None of them notice it at once because Yoongi is just mindlessly admiring the surroundings and all the different people passing by while Taehyung is the one intently listening to Iya’s stories. They’re just trailing behind her as she tells the tales of her various escapades in this very place.

When Iya turns back to look at them, her story stops abruptly and she smiles. She smiles like she knows something Yoongi doesn’t and swiftly turns away to continue the story. And then, Yoongi is suddenly hyper-aware of the weight on his own palm, and slowly, it registers in his mind that he reached for the younger’s hand himself and now bears another weight; this time on his chest: keeping it up because he initiated it.

He blanches at the thought of holding Taehyung’s hand throughout the entire walk. He would probably die. He would die. An awful death caused by holding the hand of his best friend. And his mind, ugh his mind, is racing, his thoughts are a mess, I hope he hasn’t noticed yet I hope he hasn’t noticed yet I hope he hasn’t noticed yet I hope he—

But apparently, Taehyung’s not letting him breathe because the boy has the audacity to interlock their goddamn fingers together.

He isn’t even looking at Yoongi as he does it, but Yoongi is trying his best not to turn red in the middle of the fucking street and he feels like he’s failing. Oh shit, he’s really going through it.

His soul is just about to leave his body when, “here we are,” Iya declares once they reach a concrete staircase connected to the side of a building. Yoongi’s heart is beating so fast and it’s ridiculous. “I know it looks like it hasn’t been touched by humanity in like, a decade, but that’s just the exterior. I’m sure you guys will love it inside.”

Yoongi doesn’t move at all even when Iya starts leading them up, and barely registers Taehyung gripping his hand tighter until the boy actually tugs on him and he stumbles. “Yoon, what are you waiting for?”

He looks up at Taehyung and sees him smiling so tenderly, and he panics, yanking his hand away.

Taehyung deflates. Immediately, Yoongi regrets what he just did. But he can’t do anything about that now.

“Hey, are you guys coming?” Iya shouts from the top of the staircase. The two of them make their way up the stairs wordlessly. The inside is decidedly beautiful. It’s furnished and decorated like a grandmother’s house. A small chandelier hangs by the ceiling, giving the whole place a bright atmosphere. The way the place is set up, it’s almost eerie how quiet it is. It’s so alive, but it feels like no one is there except for them.

“Lola Deng?” Iya calls out quietly. “Lola Deng, can we order something?”

Lola is the Tagalog word for grandmother, so Yoongi assumes that that’s why the joint is set up the way it is. It doesn’t even look like an eatery; it just looks like a home.

“Ate Iya?” A small voice responds. A girl emerges from the curtains separating the rest of the room from the dining area. She looks extremely surprised. “I haven’t seen you in ages!”

Iya rushes in and hugs the girl tightly. “I’ve been busy, Pia. Oh, and meet my friends. This is... uh...” She gestures to Taehyung, squinting like she’s trying to remember something, and continues, “Vincent, and August. I met them in San Juan and they’re on a trip around Batangas.”

The girl smiles at them. “Hi. My name’s Olympia, but you can call me Pia.”

“Where’s Lola Deng? These two want to try her special goto.”

“Oh, you haven’t heard.”

The older woman raises her brows. “Is something wrong?”

Pia laughs. “No, no. Lola is in Maldives for a vacation. One of my aunts gave her a treat and now she’s enjoying herself. She messages me every time she gets a Piña Colada.”

“Well, she deserves a vacation after decades of building this place up.”

“I know! She didn’t want to accept the treat at first until I finally convinced her that I can run this place just fine.” Pia says. “Anyway, enough about that, we have guests. I’ll go make the goto.”

“I’ll go with you, we should catch up.” Iya offers. “Guys, I’ll be back, okay?” She says quickly. Pia takes her hand and they leave for the kitchen, footsteps echoing on the wooden floor.

Taehyung and Yoongi are left alone in the wide space. Great, just like what Yoongi’s been dreading. He looks around aimlessly so as to keep himself from looking at the younger boy.

“Yoon—”

“Tae—”

“I’m sorry,” Taehyung blurts out quietly. “I didn’t mean to scare you. I know you aren’t comfortable with—”

“No!” He responds almost immediately, already knowing what Taehyung is going to say. His tone comes off as mad, and Taehyung winces. Yoongi feels like he just made the situation worse. “Hey, no, that wasn’t it. I’m comfortable with you. I was just surprised because, uh... you pulled me. Sorry. We can hold hands any time. Like before. It’s okay.”

Taehyung looks like he doesn’t believe him.

Well, now that that’s been said, he doesn’t think he believes himself either.

They haven’t held hands since the end of eighth grade. (That was the time Yoongi’s feelings got real messy, and he just stopped initiating the hand-holding.)

“Okay.” Taehyung mutters. “Okay, yeah.”

Fuck, Yoongi hates this. He and Taehyung aren’t supposed to be awkward. They’re best friends. “Anyway, I wanted to ask you why you said Grumpy Bear is a lot like me.”

“I said he’s a little bit like you. Get it right.” And just like that, the snark is back. Yoongi is thankful for that. “And, well, he’s the tough love kind of guy. He’s just being real, you know? Like you.”

He’s about to reply when Taehyung continues, “you’re like a little raincloud sometimes. So every time you smile, the world just kinda... lights up, and stuff.”

Yoongi bites his lip then, trying to suppress the huge gummy smile that he knows is threatening to show on his face. “Okay.”

“Okay.”

It’s almost two in the afternoon and the sun is still very much willing to shine its rays upon the humble land of the Philippines, so they’re back in the car to rest for a bit before going on a 30-minute drive to Balete, Batangas. Taehyung is asleep on the driver’s seat and Yoongi is beside him, somehow awake, wearing his earphones and listening to music from his phone.

Iya volunteered to buy snacks and drinks for the drive, so she’s in the nearby 7-11. With her absence and Taehyung’s afternoon slumber, it’s pretty much silent in the car.

Yoongi’s clutching Bedtime Bear to his chest and thinking about a lot of things. Like about how he’s basically been escaping from reality for the past few days. About how he’ll deal with coming back to it later on. About how he can truly move on from these ridiculous feelings. All this while Ely Buendia resonates in his ears through his earbuds, saying, “magkahawak ang ating kamay, at walang kamalay-malay... na tinuruan mo ang puso ko na umibig ng tunay.”

It’s not helpful that the song is making him remember Taehyung. Taehyung, Taehyung, Taehyung.

It’s always Taehyung.

The boy doesn’t even have an idea about all the shit that Yoongi is feeling for him.

Which is, as he always tells himself, the best possible situation. He can’t let his intelligent, beautiful, caring, and loving best friend know about his feelings. It may be embarrassing that he’s the literal embodiment of the famous ‘I don’t want to ruin our friendship’ cliché, but then again, it would be more embarrassing — not to mention painful and unbearable — to have Taehyung avoid him for the rest of his life because of his irrelevant feelings.

He doesn’t even know if Taehyung is into guys at all.

And now his mind wanders over to places he didn’t even know existed. Is he being obvious? What if Taehyung does have some kind of idea about how he feels?

Iya apparently knew off the bat. Is he that ridiculously in love with Taehyung that his face just shows it? Does he look at Taehyung like he hung the moon or something?

The song he’s listening to has shifted to the long instrumental part with an emphasized guitar, so he didn’t hear Iya knocking on the car’s windows. He only noticed her when he opened his eyes and saw her waving her right hand at him, so he hurriedly unlocks the car door and opens it for her from the inside.

“I bought chips, drinks, bread, and... uh...” she slowly trails off once she gets comfortable in the backseat again, “I also bought doughnuts.” She locks the door again.

“Thanks.”

After that, silence.

Yoongi pauses his music a minute or so later, just right in time for Iya to say in a hushed voice, “are you ever going to tell him?”

“Tell him and what? Ruin a perfectly good friendship?” He responds almost immediately. “I’d rather not, thanks.”

What surprises him is the older’s answer. “Don’t worry. I get it.”

He looks at her through the rear view mirror and sees that she’s got some kind of forlorn expression on her face. She’s not looking his way, she’s just staring off into space. Yoongi’s about to ask her about it when she puts her smile back on, and fetches her phone from her pocket. “You know, I think we should head to Balete now to go see Marian Orchard. We’ll be leaving for for Taal today, right? It’s best for us to get back at our hotel early today too so we can rest before we get on the road again. It’s an hour drive.”

Yoongi nods and doesn’t pry about how she changed the subject so quickly. Instead, he shakes Taehyung to wake him up.

Now, they’re on their way to Balete, Batangas, and ready to experience the cleansing power of nature.

The drive is uneventful except for the moment Iya dropped her an doughnut on her jeans. Taehyung reached over to the glove compartment to get his tissue box, and his hands brushed against Yoongi’s thighs far more times than what is considered acceptable by a person who has normal human emotions.

Arriving at said orchard, Yoongi is surprised to see that the it’s not exactly an orchard. Sure, it’s full of trees and stuff, but it’s almost like a park, looking from the outside. The huge gates are gold and have angel wings on them. It makes sense because the place actually is a spiritual and religious retreat.

There’s an acceptable amount of people he can see before even entering the actual premises of the so-called orchard. It doesn’t have a guard or anything. There’s just an old lady, a desk, some papers, and some pens. They just have to list their names in the log book and pay 25 pesos each for a ticket. The price is surprising because even without entering, the beauty of the place can be visualized already.

The old lady smiles at them as they enter the smaller gates and finally get the view for themselves.

Taehyung gives Yoongi a look before dashing away to scan the surroundings by himself. It’s magnificent— white, gold, and pastel blue mixed with the natural colors of nature. There are replicas of famous Renaissance and Romantic era artworks, sculptures and paintings littering the area.

“Are you ready to see art nerd Taehyung Vincent Kim, fully unleashed?” Yoongi asks Iya out of the blue. “You saw a glimpse of him in the cathedral this morning. This time, he’s going full art nerd and you will be surprised.”

“Taehyung’s an art nerd?” is Iya’s first response, in complete disbelief. “No wonder he kept going around the cathedral and straining his neck like a weirdo just to look up at the paintings—”

“And the architecture, obviously. He talked about it while he was asleep in the car.”

“Gi!” Taehyung comes back barreling at him on full speed. “Gi! C’mere,” he pants, breathless with all the running he’s doing.

Iya raises a brow at Yoongi to ask what’s going on. Right then, Taehyung gets close enough to grab his hand and starts to run back to where he came from.

“Hey! You’re really just gonna leave me here?” Iya asks, offended. “Wait for me, you jerks!”

Yoongi wants to look back at Iya to tell her that she should go with them, but instead he just keeps running along with Taehyung.

On the other hand, he also thinks he could die. Again.

That would ruin the moment, wouldn’t it? There they are, two friends running together and holding hands like they’re in some sort of Korean drama set in Gangwon Province. And then one of them dies and falls into the green, green grass and the ending song plays.

Spoiler: Yoongi’s the one who dies.

He’s running out of breath. Aside from the fact that Yoongi hadn’t had enough exercise because he quit playing basketball for his school, he’s also starting to lose his damn mind because Taehyung is holding his hand again and they’re running in the middle of a fucking rosarium. They’re in a rose garden full of pink and red roses and they’re still holding hands.

“Remind me to never run with you again,” he pants, looking up at Taehyung sending him a (slightly) murderous glare. The younger is still not letting his hand go, and Yoongi admits to himself that this is his fault. He let Taehyung think that it was okay to hold his hand.

In his panic and hatred for running, he didn’t notice that Taehyung brought his expensive camera with him, and that it’s hanging on his neck. The boy flashes him a smile that could rival the brightness of the stars before saying, “let me take pictures of you.”

When Yoongi doesn’t answer immediately, Taehyung squeezes his hand. “Can I?” He asks again, leaning in until their faces are just a few centimeters away, and stares into Yoongi’s eyes. It’s so intimate that Yoongi wonders if no one’s around to see it, but then again he wouldn’t dare look around to see for himself. He just thanks whatever gods are out there that there’s a literal camera bag in the middle of them that keeps Taehyung’s chest and face from touching his own.

He senses that if he doesn’t answer soon, Taehyung is just going to do more outrageous things, so Yoongi masks his fluster with a nervous laugh and pushes him away. “Okay! We can do that. Go on.”

Yoongi can say that he’s used to this— being Taehyung’s model. He used to say that he’s comfortable enough to be in front of a camera because it’s his best friend who’s behind it, but alas. It’s a little different now because Taehyung keeps staring at him. He probably figured out a lot of things about photography and that’s why he’s taking it even more seriously now.

As expected, Marian Orchard was wide enough for Yoongi’s knees to hurt while walking around and sightseeing. It’s peaceful and quiet even if there are lots of other people around them.

The chapel in the middle of it all is white, made of plaster, and positively one of the most pleasing things to look at. The ceilings are adorned with pale blue sky frescoes. It’s the only part of the place with very little color, focusing mostly on white and pale blue and looking like a stark contrast against the lush greens and bright reds of the roses. An adjective to describe it would be heavenly.

Yoongi and Taehyung have been separated from Iya for a while now, and they only notice it when they see the fountain close to the gates again.

Iya arrives just a little bit later when Taehyung is taking his last photo. It’s of Yoongi looking at his reflection in the clear water of the white fountain. “Hey, you two want some doughnuts?” The woman says right after they hear the shutter click. She appears behind Taehyung holding a small box, which Yoongi assumes contains the doughnuts she’s talking about. “I’ve got Bavarian Filled, Boston Kreme, Sugar Raised, and three Butternuts. Actually, make that two, ‘cause I ate one already.”

Iya leads them to a gazebo near the fountain so they can eat said doughnuts in peace.

“By the way, Taehyung,” she says once she swallows her first bite of her Bavarian, “this is a religious retreat, so please don’t do any reckless things like that running around earlier. When you were running, a nun was looking at you, and she was horrified.”

“I’m sorry! I saw those really nice rose bushes and I immediately thought of my Yoongi, ‘cause he loved roses when we were little. I couldn’t pass up the chance to take pictures of him again.”

Yoongi coughs at the possessive pronoun, but he tries not to let it show. Taehyung used to say ‘my Yoongi’ all the time when they were younger, and of course it faded away as they grew, so it sounds new to his ears. He’s Taehyung’s. What kind of bullshit.

The conversation flows easily then, fluctuates from serious to fun. Yoongi’s just trying to enjoy his Butternut-flavored doughnut while Taehyung and Iya talk about random things. He checks his phone for the time, and it’s 3:32. The heat is bearable, strangely, and he wonders if it’s because God is protecting the old people visiting Marian Orchard from the shitty first degree burn-worthy heat that people call summer, or if it’s because he’s still feeling giddy from being the focus of Taehyung’s camera earlier.

Probably both.

He’s aware, completely aware that he’s fucking up his life even more. He went on this trip planning to move the fuck on and stop having feelings for his best friend, but right now he thinks these feelings are just getting stronger.

And why wouldn’t they, when Taehyung himself is being a beautiful oblivious mess right in front of him?

Yoongi sighs.

“Oh look, it’s developing,” he hears Iya mutter to herself.

He looks over to Iya and Taehyung’s part of the table and sees that she’s watching a polaroid slowly develop. He watches too, curious.

“It’s cute,” Taehyung coos when he the photo is finally fully visible. It’s a random cat sitting near one of the many bushes surrounding them. “You didn’t tell me you had an instax.”

“I’ve been taking a lot of pictures since we went to the Carmel Church. But you guys can’t see them yet. It’s a surprise.” She winks, admiring the cat’s picture one more time before putting it in her bag. “Anyway, I think we should get going.”

Yoongi nods. “I think so too.”

“Hey, hey, by the way, I’d just like to take this opportunity to tell you two that I am genuinely, extremely glad that I went on this trip with the two of you. I’ve been to all these places already but you guys made it more fun for me. I’ll miss you two when you go back to Manil—”

“Iya,” Taehyung shushes her, “don’t talk about that. We still have Taal on our checklist.”

“Uh, yeah, about that...” She trails off. “I was actually... gonna back out from that?” She adds, voice meek.

Yoongi looks at her and sees the same expression she had in the car during early morning. “Is there a reason?”

She stills. “Yeah.”

He taps his fingernails on the metal table. Taehyung is looking at him with caution, and he looks back, but he continues, “then what is it? Was it also the reason you were crying earlier this morning?”

“Yoongi, don’t you think that’s a little too personal?” Taehyung intervenes. “You don’t need to tell us, Iya.”

“Don’t worry, it’s okay.” She responds. “I’ll tell you: yeah, it is for the same reason. Something happened there, but I swear it’s not that serious. I think I’m just scared.”

“Scared of what?”

“You know what, I don’t know either.” Iya says.

Yoongi checks the time on his phone again. 3:40. “Let’s go back to the hotel.” He gives the other boy a glance.

Taehyung nods.

Once all their stuff is gathered safely and (arguably) neatly inside their bags, they make their way to Taal.

The route they chose to take is the shorter one complete with steep and winding roads that any inexperienced driver wouldn’t be able to survive. Luckily, though, Taehyung is no inexperienced driver. He successfully got through the roads of Cuenca without much difficulty.

Iya is uncharacteristically quiet and refuses to look anyone in the eye. She did say that she wasn’t backing out anymore, but it’s still a mystery why she was about to do it in the first place.

“A few more minutes and we’ll be in Taal already,” is the first thing she says that evening. The skies have darkened and it’s drizzling. The sound of it is a little lonely; a drizzle in the middle of summer, a disturbance in a ‘perfect’ summer day. “The first thing you’ll recognize is the Basilica. There’s a hotel very close to it, and I know people there. You can stay in that hotel for the night.”

Taehyung turns his head to look at her, then quickly goes back to looking at the road. “Do you want us to drop you off?”

“You don’t need to. I’ll help you guys check in, then I’m just going to walk. My family’s home is close there anyway.”

“Okay.”

There’s a certain feeling that settles in Yoongi’s gut when he sees the famed Taal Basilica for the first time. The drizzle has evolved into full-on rain now, obscuring his view of the church slightly but at the same time framing it perfectly. And he’s not religious at all, but seeing it, so much bigger than any of the churches he’s seen in his lifetime, feels like a miracle. He knows it’s the biggest Catholic church in Asia, and the one with the richest history too. It’s surreal that he’s here now; he feels like he’s conquering the world, and strangely, like he’s doing it with Taehyung.

Again, Taehyung.

It always ends with Taehyung.

“Hey, see that?” Iya speaks up again, pointing towards a traditional-looking house, standing proud against the modernized buildings around it. “That’s a heritage house that the municipality turned into a hotel. It’s called Casa Punzalan. That’s where you can stay tonight.”

The environment is a little eerie. It’s 7:49, the night is young, but it feels like they’re the only ones in there. It would make sense if they were away from the town, but they aren’t— they’re in the middle of it. It’s just too quiet.

Taehyung parks the car in the nearest open space, then reaches for the glove compartment to get an umbrella. Yoongi closes it, avoiding the younger’s eyes by acting sleepy and leaning back into the passenger seat. The younger gets out of the car and opens the door for Iya. His voice is muffled by the distinctly loud sound of heavy raindrops when he says, “Yoon, let’s go!”

Yoongi shouts an affirmative and reaches for the other umbrella— the one under the backseat.

(He left that umbrella in there more than a year ago. Surprising how it’s still there.)

Upon entering said hotel, Yoongi notices two things; one, that the interior is awfully similar to that of a creepy house in some horror movie he saw as a kid, and two, that the stairs would kill him. They’re probably the steepest staircases he’s ever seen, and he’s been to Casa de Segunda already, which is also famous for its steep staircases. The ones in front of him right now are way worse.

Iya is talking to the front desk staff, and Yoongi is a little too tired to listen. He just wants to take a nice warm bath, and sleep.

But when his ears catch the words ‘one room’ and ‘only one bed’, he immediately listens to the conversation. And then Taehyung takes over.

“So you mean, there’s only one queen size four-poster bed in that room?”

“Yes.”

“But it’s air-conditioned?”

“Yes to that, too.”

“And that’s the only room available?”

“Uh-huh.”

And he has the audacity to say, “Okay. We’ll take it.”

Yoongi blinks. “What the hell,” he starts. “What the hell did you just say, Tae?”

“We’ll take the room,” the younger replies like he’s stating the obvious (which he is, but it’s not that way to Yoongi).

“You know that we can just wait until tomorrow and just sleep in your car tonight, right?” He says quietly, hoping that none of the staff can hear him.

Taehyung rolls his eyes. The attitude. “Yoon, it’s raining heavily. I heard from the radio that it’s not stopping until tomorrow. Besides, we’ve shared a bed before, so there really isn’t any problem.”

The last time the two of them shared a bed is during their last sleepover, and that was like, six years ago on Taehyung’s birthday. Sure, that was valid, but they were young and they just wanted to play video games all night. It’s different now.

But still, Yoongi would like to save his spine from being fully destroyed, and he’d also love to be in a comfortable bed right now; with or without Taehyung in it. So he relents. “Fine,” he says exasperatedly. “Let’s take the room.”

And that is the story of how Yoongi Min, a 19 year old boy from the big city, is now lying down in an ancient bed in a dark hotel room with other ancient-looking furniture, clutching a pillow to his chest in the middle of the night.

He’s staring at the ceiling. Taehyung is currently fast asleep on the other side of the bed and facing away from him, snoring a little.

He was asleep just like Taehyung earlier, but the sound of dense rainfall against the windows woke him up. The time is 12:17 in the morning according to his phone.

His mother texted him for the first time since he left two days ago. I’m so sorry, yoongi. please come home soon. He texts back, when i’m ready, mom.

The rain is unrelenting. He’s pretty sure it’s developed into a thunderstorm now, because he can hear a few rumbles already. And Yoongi isn’t afraid of thunderstorms anymore, really— he’s a man. A(n arguably) grown man. He’s 19.

But the thunder is so loud that he wonders how Taehyung is still asleep. The fact that the hotel room is probably made of old light materials is also giving him a dose of anxiety. What if the lightning hits it? It would burn down. It would be a tragedy. Casa Punzalan, one of the biggest ancestral houses in Taal, preserved for its culture, would burn down because of lightning. And they would either die or survive.

“I can hear you thinking.”

Yoongi jumps a little, turning his head to look at his right side. Taehyung is facing him now, eyes still closed but definitely more awake than asleep.

“Sorry,” he manages to reply, glancing at the younger man beside him. His hair is ruffled; sticking up the way it always does when he wakes up. “Go back to sleep. Just don’t mind me.”

“It’s the thunderstorm, isn’t it?”

Yoongi sighs. There’s no sense in lying to someone who’s been in your life for so long. “Yeah.”

Taehyung smiles softly at him. “I used to sing you songs to help you forget about the thunder.”

“Go back to sleep, Taehyung.”

The younger shakes his head, fully awake now. “I’m going to sing for you again.”

“We’re not kids anymore,” Yoongi says.

“Who cares?” Taehyung chuckles. It reminds Yoongi of the thunder itself, low and rumbling, but somehow its effect is the opposite. It calms him. “Pagmasdan ang ulan, unti-unting pumapatak sa mga halama’t mga bulaklak,” he starts singing, voice mellow and deep.

Yoongi is then reminded of playing in the rain, running around in the front yard of Taehyung’s house, holding the green water hose and splashing the younger with it.

Taehyung continues the song. “Pagmasdan ang dilim, unti-unting bumabalot sa buong paligid t’wing umuulan.”

He remembers laughing as Taehyung chases him, and trying not to stumble over the rose bushes under the darkened skies.

“Kasabay ng ulan, bumubuhos ang ‘yong ganda, kasabay ng hanging kumakanta,”

He looks at Taehyung now. The kid he used to play with in the rain. The kid he used to throw dirt at. The kid he used to squirt the water hose at.

Taehyung is looking at him, too; with his beautiful chocolate eyes washed with honey, and sings, “Maaari bang huwag ka nang sa piling ko’y lumisan pa, hanggang ang hangi’t ula’y tumila na?”

The rain outside gets even stronger, the drops falling on the tin roof heavy and straining to one’s ears. A flash of lightning comes, then a rumble of thunder, but Yoongi doesn’t notice any of it; he’s too caught up in Taehyung’s eyes, and the gentle way his voice fills the room.

Taehyung is staring back at him with a soft smile on his lips.

Buhos na ulan, aking mundo’y lunuring tuluyan
Tulad ng pag-agos mo
‘Di mapipigil ang puso kong nagliliyab

Yoongi’s heart is threatening to burst out of his ribcage. But somehow, he can’t look away from Taehyung; too mesmerized by his lips and his eyes and his nose and his hair and his almost invisible freckles — everything, everything.

Minsan pa ulan, bumuhos ka
‘Wag nang tumigil pa
Hatid mo ma’y bagyo
Dalangin ito ng puso kong sumasamo

Everything makes him want to say it.

“Yoongi?”

He blinks. “Y-Yeah?”

Taehyung is right there, lips so enticing. His slightly tanned skin still glows indescribably lovely in the dark. “Is there something you’d like to tell me?”

“I—” He chokes on his words, “I’m... going to the lobby.”

“Yoon—”

Yoongi is out of the room before Taehyung could protest any further.

The next morning comes too quick. It’s four when Yoongi receives a text from Iya. Hey. Good morn. Don’t wait for me today ok? I have a place to be this morning. Explore if u want :)

Yoongi frowns. It’s way too early to say ‘good morn’ to anyone. The sun hasn’t even risen up yet. Still, he replies with an ok. take care. almost immediately.

The night before had been disastrous. He didn’t come back into their room and stayed in the lobby for hours, falling asleep on one of the couches behind a curtain. If Taehyung came looking for him, he doesn’t know.

And he doesn’t want to think about it.

Taal is more peaceful than most of the places he’s ever visited in his life. Somehow, it also feels like the sky is bluer in here. The air is fresher, too, with almost no hint of gas fumes from passing vehicles. It’s perfect, and Yoongi knows he can’t let that opportunity go.

When he musters up enough courage to go back to the room, it’s already almost six and he’s hungry. He carefully peeks through the little crack he makes while opening the door of their shared hotel room, and finds that it’s empty. Great.

He changes into a comfortable set of casual clothes and makes his way towards the kitchen, where the food is being prepared. No traces of Taehyung there, either. But Yoongi is mildly thankful for that.

He orders a mug of steaming barako coffee, native to the province.

It’s a very short walk from the Casa to the Basilica. Even from afar, it’s already obvious that there’s some sort of event going to take place in it today — lots of people are gathered in the grounds, some in gowns and some in suits. What stands out is the white Maserati in front of the huge church doors, its polish glinting under the harsh sunlight. There are flowers on the hood.

It’s a wedding.

Weirdly, Yoongi finds himself feeling curious about it, and since he did initially intend to go visit the Basilica, he decides to find out who’s getting married by seeing the ceremony for himself. After all, it’s not every day that someone gets married with a sweet Maserati Ghibli as their ride.

Entering it, Yoongi immediately feels the grandiose atmosphere get to him. Everything looks so extravagant. The church itself is the epitome of lavish, but the wedding decorations make it even more so.

The ceremony has already started; the groom is already near the altar, and everyone is lined up. The ring bearer and the flower girl are walking together down the aisle, and Yoongi watches as they separate once they reach the bridesmaids and groomsmen.

And then, the bridal march starts playing.

But Yoongi isn’t paying attention to the bride entering the church doors.

He’s paying attention to a certain face he recognizes. Iya is in a corner of the church, just looking at the ceremony unfold. It doesn’t seem like she’s happy.

“Hey,” he calls out once he manages to come closer. She doesn’t seem to hear him, so he repeats it, and then she looks at him.

“Yoongi?”

“What are you doing here?” She asks him, but then quickly continues, “ah, wait, I know why. You’re avoiding Taehyung?”

“Wha—” he stammers, “why would I even, why would I avoid him?”

“He texted me last night, asking if you went to my house. He was looking for you because apparently you bolted out of your room at midnight. Taehyung’s worried, you know. Thought you ran off into the storm.”

“I’m not avoiding him,” Yoongi says in defense. “I just needed some fresh air. Not my fault he couldn’t see me in the lobby.”

“Or maybe you really are avoiding him.”

“I am not avoiding Taehyung!” He argues. “I’m just exploring like you told me. I should be asking you why you’re here instead.”

Iya gives him a small smile. “I’m watching my former best friend get married.”

Former best friend? Yoongi wants to pry. “The bride?” He asks instead.

“The groom,” she corrects him, eyes focused on the couple near the altar. “I’ve known him since I was nine. You know, classic childhood best friend story. We grew apart and haven’t talked for years.”

“Why?”

She looks at him for a split-second before gazing back at the bride and groom. “I told him I’m in love with him.”

Yoongi feels like someone splashed him with a bucket of ice-cold water in the middle of summer.

“Didn’t even invite me to his wedding,” she adds. “Fucking rude of him, right?”

Yoongi realizes something. “Yesterday morning... when you were crying... was that—”

Her eyes are watering. “Yeah. I only found out about the wedding yesterday. Guy threw away nine years of friendship just because his best friend was being honest about her feelings.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine, I’m mostly just sad now. I’ve gotten over him, but you know,” Iya snorts, “I guess I just miss my best friend.”

Yoongi decides.

Noon comes by too soon, and Yoongi finds that Taehyung really is worried about him when he comes back to the Casa.

“Yoon!” Taehyung jumps up from the bed and tackles him in a hug. “Oh my god, where did you go? I was so worried, you asshole!”

Yoongi rubs his back half-heartedly. “I was just asleep in the lobby.”

The sudden presence of air conditioner is making his shirt stick to his sweaty skin even more, but that’s not what he’s worried about now. He’s worried about how he’s going to keep his feelings hidden, how he’s going to get over Taehyung, how he’s going to move on.

He’s worried about coming back to Manila. Worried about his parents, worried about his future, worried about everything.

Worried about facing reality again.

“Are we going to Iya’s place for lunch?” Taehyung asks him suddenly.

Yoongi nods, not looking him in the eye. “Let’s go now. She’s waiting.”

Iya leads them to her house, just a few blocks behind the capitol. None of them talk on the way. Yoongi forces himself to only look at the ground. He pretends like he doesn’t feel Taehyung’s eyes lingering too long on him; pretends like they don’t have anything to talk about.

It’s something he’s gotten pretty good at.

When he decides to pay attention to his surroundings again, it’s when he sees the quaint little house that Iya has led them to. It’s not the kind of house one would expect a person like her would live in.

Very far from what they’ve seen of Iya’s lifestyle.

It’s not small, but not big either. Just perfect for maybe a family of three. Also not lavish at all. The house is two-story, with plain white walls and a tiled floor. There’s a small vertical aquarium on the other side of the room, housing a single Siamese fighting fish with blue and white scales. The walls are littered with frames of paintings and impressive cross-stitch art, all extremely detailed but seemed to focus on marine life.

The biggest painting catches most of Yoongi’s attention, and only rightfully because it’s almost as tall as the wall itself. It’s a mermaid sitting on a rock. Her brown skin and long black hair are both glinting, and her tail is a gradient, watercolor blue and red scales looking impossibly shiny.

It doesn’t take long for Yoongi to realize that the mermaid is Iya.

But there’s something missing in the painting.

“Ma?” Iya calls out in the small living room as they enter, seemingly unbothered by Yoongi staring at the huge painting. “Ma, our guests are here.”

“Magandang tanghali po,” Yoongi says politely.

A woman wearing an apron peeks out from what could be presumed as the kitchen. She smiles widely at them. Iya doesn’t look much like her, but they definitely share a resemblance— the same tone of voice, the same smile. She even has her hair in a Dutch braid. She’s definitely Iya’s mother. “Hi! Mga hijo, you two can take a seat. I’m just finishing up.”

Taehyung beats Yoongi to saying ‘thank you’, but none of them move to take a seat as Iya’s mother said. Iya rolls her eyes and pulls them to sit on a black loveseat. She then starts rummaging through a low drawer, kneeling to make it easier.

“Yayi, have you set the table?” Her mother shouts from the kitchen, accompanied by the sound of a stove turning off.

Iya is still sorting through the drawer. “Yes, Ma. You need any help there?”

“No, it’s fine,” she answers. “If you’re trying to find the remote control, it’s with Luigi.”

The information seems to make Iya disappointed. She sighs exasperatedly, closing the drawer and standing from her position. “It’s always Luigi.”

Who’s Luigi? Yoongi wants to ask, but he doesn’t want to intrude.

“Well, you can’t blame me.” Her mother comes out of the kitchen now, holding a big ceramic bowl of something that smells an awful lot like tinola. “Just get it. Luigi’s been holding on to it for hours.”

The younger woman huffs, but still she walks over to the other side of the room, and indeed the remote control she’d been searching for is with Luigi.

Luigi is the fish.

“Oh, and Yayi, get the rice for me, will ya?”

Iya uses the remote to turn the TV on, and leaves for the kitchen. She comes back almost immediately with a platter of rice.

Tita Andi, as she introduced herself, was apparently a marine biology professor in a well-known university in Batangas up until a year ago, when she decided to take a rest. The information explains a lot about the marina theme that somehow keeps the white walls of their home alive.

The meal ends more quickly than any of them would have liked, but it’s fine. Tita Andi insists that they should stay for dinner, accepting no refusals. She states that she’s already planned the meal and that it would be a waste if they didn’t stay.

“I’m going to the market to buy the ingredients now,” she announces once her favorite afternoon telenovela (was it called Vanessa? Principessa? Contessa?) is over. It’s almost three.

“We’ll go with you!” Taehyung offers enthusiastically.

She laughs. “You are not! I have to keep my recipe a secret from everyone. Even Yayi doesn’t know my bulalo recipe.”

“Ma, I don’t even know how to cook,” Iya interjects frowning slightly. “I won’t be able to recreate your bulalo even if you tell me your recipe.”

“I’m leaving alone. I can handle it.”

“Okay, Ma. Take care.”

“Alright,” she smiles. “You kids should just chill here. Talk to Luigi. He gets lonely.”

They lounge around the house for the next two hours, talking about random things and not-so-random things.

Taehyung asks about the artworks.

Iya smiles, more to herself than them. “The cross-stitches are mine, but all the paintings are my dad’s. He was a painter. That huge mermaid one was the last one he painted before he died of cancer three years ago.”

“Oh. I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine! I like it when people ask about my dad and his artworks. I rarely get to talk about him.”

“Why did he paint you as a mermaid?” Yoongi tries, not missing the new kind of smile that takes over Iya’s face.

“He wasn’t able to watch me compete at the Olympics because he was in the hospital getting treated. So he decided that he would paint me the way he imagined it. He painted that for maybe six months only with watercolor.”

Taehyung nods. “Was there anything else he was trying to paint in there?”

“You’ve got a good eye,” Iya replies, looking at the painting fondly. “It was a gold medal. You can see the green lace around the mermaid’s neck, but he passed before he could paint the medal itself. But that’s okay, I didn’t win a medal anyway,” she laughs.

Yoongi feels Taehyung staring at him again, and it makes him want to tell the truth— the dangerous truth. It’s awful. He feels like he wants to hold on to something that isn’t there. He feels like Taehyung wants him to say something so that he could just end everything right away and it’s fucking frustrating.

“Why’s your fish named Luigi?” Yoongi says suddenly, surprising Iya.

“Luigi? Oh, that fish is old. People say fighting fish only live up to five years, but this one’s eight years old. He’s actually never been aggressive even though he’s a fighting fish.”

“Yeah, but why’s he named Luigi?”

“Dude, I don’t know,” she shrugs. “Mama named him, and somehow 14-year-old me just accepted that my fish would be named Luigi. I think I found it funny at the time, just calling a fish Luigi and confusing people. Ma always leaves the remote control with him.”

They then spend the rest of the afternoon talking to Luigi as if he were a real person.

It’s almost five when Tita Andi comes home carrying eco-bags of beef, bones, and other bulalo ingredients.

Yoongi volunteers to help her pressure cook the meat and bones (since apparently he’s the only one in the house who actually knows how to cook apart from Tita, and also because he needs to escape Taehyung). It’s a quarter to eight when they finish the dish.

“Dinner’s ready!” Tita says, walking out of the kitchen and carefully putting the bulalo platter on the table. Again, they eat it up like they’re starved (maybe they are) and the meal is done in almost no time. But Iya digs up avocado ice cream from the fridge and they all agree to have dessert and continue talking.

“So you two have been friends for how many years?” Tita Andi asks after filling her cup with ice cream.

“For almost 12 years now, I think. We met as seven-year-olds,” Taehyung answers. “We haven’t been apart since then.”

The dessert spoon falls out of Yoongi’s hand, dropping onto the floor and clinking strongly against the blue tiles.

“S-Sorry,” Yoongi says, immediately pushing his chair back to retrieve it from the floor.

What he doesn’t know is that Taehyung has done the same, and their hands brush accidentally upon picking up the spoon. Yoongi feels—swears that he feels—an electric shock throughout his body when their hands made contact, and he curses, getting up as Taehyung acquires the spoon himself.

“I think I n-need to go outside.” He mutters, more to himself than the people around him. He doesn’t dare look up from the floor, bolting out of the house.

And Yoongi is running; running just like the way he’d been running for years. He doesn’t know, doesn’t care where he’s going, but he’s running and it’s all that matters.

“Yoongi! Wait!”

He hears Taehyung’s voice right behind him. “Where are you going?”

“Leave me alone.”

“Why should I?”

Yoongi halts. “You don’t need to know,” he says in a cold voice.

“That’s always your fucking reason,” the younger bites back. “I’m so tired of being kept in the dark, Yoongi! You really think you can fool me by saying that you were avoiding everyone and not just me? I’m not dumb! I saw you with your other friends almost every day, and you were smiling. Fucking laughing with them. So no, I don’t believe you weren’t avoiding me specifically!”

“It’s none of your business, Taeh—”

“Then why is it none of my goddamn business? I went on this trip thinking that you would be honest with me. But I knew you were lying. You lied to me on the beach, and I let that slide because I thought you just weren’t ready. But to this day you’re still lying to me!”

“I’m not lying to you!” He argues.

Taehyung glares at him even though his eyes are starting to water. “You are. Every time I ask you something, you run. I tell you almost everything, Yoongi. I tell you everything because I trust you. Because you’re my best friend. Because you’re fucking important to me!”

Yoongi clenches his fist. “Well... maybe you’re not that important to me.”

A single tear rolls down Taehyung’s right cheek. “Then I’m sorry for thinking that I ever mattered to you.”

He takes one last tearful glance at Yoongi before walking towards the opposite direction.

And Yoongi is left alone with his mistakes.

The 7-11 is deserted save for Yoongi and the cashier.

Yoongi is just sitting on one of the tables, resting his chin on his palm and looking outside through the glass windows.

The once cold drink he bought is just sitting in front of him, not cold anymore. It’s already condensed enough that the water is soaking through his long sleeve, but he doesn’t care. It doesn’t matter.

He was stupid.

Scratch that; he is stupid. He’d focused so much on himself and his bullshit that he forgot about Taehyung’s own feelings. He forgot that Taehyung cared for him, considered him a big part of his life.

And now his best friend is gone.

He always said that confessing his feelings could ruin their friendship. How fucking ironic was that? Instead of his confession, it was the fact that he hadn’t confessed anything that ruined it. Yoongi felt horrible.

But his coping mechanism has always been to run, and he can’t help that that’s what he’s still doing.

He sighs.

How fucking stupid of him.

“Excuse me, Kuya, can I sit here?”

A boy’s voice startles him. He shifts his gaze from the night to look at the boy in front of him. He couldn’t be any older than 12. Wearing a thin white shirt and black shorts, the kid looked undernourished as hell while holding a steaming cup of instant noodles.

“Kid, there are literally so many empty spaces.”

“Exactly. I wannna sit somewhere that’s not empty.”

Yoongi sighs. “Fine, go ahead. Just don’t bother me.”

The boy visibly brightens up at this, and sets his noodles down on the table, then sits across from Yoongi. “I don’t think I needa bother ya anyway. Y’look like somethin’s botherin’ you already.”

“You know what,” he starts, “yeah. There is something bothering me. And that’s why I’m sitting in a deserted 7-11 at eight in the evening, talking to some weird 10-year-old that I don’t know. You’re right. Something is bothering me.”

The boy laughs. “You’re funny.”

“I’m not trying to be funny.”

“Why don’cha tell me your problem then? Maybe I can help.”

Yoongi snorts. “I’m sorry, kid. I don’t think you can help.”

“Aw, c’mon! This guy’s been toughened up by the time he spent alone in them streets. I think I can offer an advice or two.”

“You talk awfully big for someone who probably doesn’t even reach up to five feet.”

“Just tell me your problem, Kuya Pogi. Stop bein’ a killjoy.”

“Alright, fine,” he sighs. “So I have a friend. This friend has a best friend. His— I mean her best friend is a really nice guy, you see, and they’ve been friends for almost all their lives. One day she realized that she’s kinda in love with said best friend, but she chooses not to tell him because it might ruin their friendship. She decides to avoid and ignore her best friend because she thinks her feelings might be too obvious, then she tries to get over him. But she can’t, even after avoiding him for like a year—”

The boy does a double take. “She avoided her best friend for a year? What kinda best friend is that? Ya friend’s a total butthead.”

“You said it,” Yoongi replies coolly, though inside he’s truly considering how awful he actually was that a 12-year-old dared to call him a total butthead. “Anyway, so she stops ignoring him and then tells him a lie to cover up why she was avoiding him. And she thinks her best friend believed this lie, but he didn’t actually. Her best friend was just waiting for her to tell him the truth, but it never came, so best friend confronted her about it. He wanted to know the truth about why he avoided him. They ended up fighting and he kind of became really harsh because he didn’t know what to say. He...”

“He what?”

“He told his best friend that... well, basically, he told him that he wasn’t important to him—”

“You were scared.”

“—which was the complete opposite of what he was actually feeling. And that’s his— her mistake. She was being stupid as hell. Plus insensitive. Now her best friend has walked away from her life, probably forever. Wait, what did you say?”

The boy stirs his noodles. The cup is now half-empty. “I said you were scared. You were being a coward.”

“Hey, hey, hey,” Yoongi says, “this isn’t about me. This is about my friend.”

“Mmkay, so you’re telling me to ignore how many times ya referred to this ‘friend’ of yours as a guy? Nuh-uh. I understand. This ain’t about no friend. This is about ya. You were the one who did that to your best friend.” He says matter-of-factly.

Yoongi narrows his eyes at the kid. “How the hell...?”

“I told ya. The time I spent in the streets taught me lotsa stuff. Continue.”

“The ending is, I don’t know what to do. I don’t know if he’s still going to listen if I tell him the actual truth.”

“Go tell him.”

“I’m sorry, what? Kid. I just told you how awful I was to him!”

“Yeah. So what?” The boy drinks what’s left of his noodles, clearing his throat after. “Ya gotta tell him. You’ve been friends for almost all your dang lives. Bein’ honest is better than anythin’.”

Yoongi sighs. “What if he doesn’t want to listen to me anymore?”

The boy smiles like he’s sure of everything. “He will. After all, he’s your kaulayaw.”

“What’s that?”

“Kaulayaw usually just means a companion, but to me it’s that one person in your life who’s always with ya. It’s the person who... no matter how hard ya try to escape, you’ll always come back to. It’s like a soulmate.”

After all, he’s your kaulayaw.

Thousands of memories come rushing back to Yoongi. Memories of heartbeats quickening, of a boy saying his name for the first time, of a boy letting him play with his toys even though they just met. Memories of a boy holding out a gift for him. Memories of a boy running after him and wiping pink icing on his face. Memories of a boy receiving the love he deserves. Memories of a boy looking painfully beautiful no matter when and where. Memories of a boy opening windows in the middle of the night, and memories of a boy catching him whenever he falls.

Memories of a boy singing melodies to him.

Memories of a boy resembling the stars.

Memories of a boy holding his hand.

Memories of a boy staying with him through thick and thin.

Memories of his kaulayaw.

Memories of Taehyung.

“Kid, I don’t know who or what you are, but you’re right,” Yoongi says, standing up instantaneously after doing so. “I’m telling him.”

“That’s the spirit!”

He grabs the drink he bought earlier and hands it to the boy. “You can have this. Thank you for talking to me— wait, what’s your name?”

“Glad I could help. Name’s Augusto. You?”

Yoongi can’t help but smile. “I’m August. We’ll see each other again, alright? Take care of yourself.”

Augusto’s eyes suddenly have a sparkle to them. “Wow. Heck yeah, ‘course we will! See you, Kuya August!”

Yoongi flashes him one last smile before dashing into the night.

The night is still unbelievably young, and so is Yoongi. He’s running again, but he’s not running like he used to. He’s running towards the truth; not running from it anymore.

It started drizzling and it’s very quickly turning into rain, but that’s not a problem.

Upon reaching Iya’s house, he finds her sitting on the front porch, looking worried.

“Yoongi!” She shouts once she sees him. “Yoongi, where have you been? Taehyung came back crying and my mother and I were so confused! What the hell happened—”

Yoongi gives her a smile. “I’m telling him.”

“You’re telling him what?”

“I’m telling him that I’m in love with him.”

After that, he starts running again, the kid’s voice ringing in his ears. After all, he’s your kaulayaw.

“Good luck, idiot! Remember that I fuckin’ support you!” Iya yells at the top of her lungs. “Go get him!”

The summer rain doesn’t hurt one bit. There’s no stopping him.

The hotel feels closer than he remembers, but he doesn’t complain. He probably looks like he just went through hell. He doesn’t care. All that matters is that he’s going to tell Taehyung. That he’s not going to be a coward anymore.

He chances upon Taehyung’s car, about to leave the parking space. His headlights were on.

“Taehyung!” He shouts. “Taetae! Wait!”

He’s probably disturbing the whole town with how loud he was being, but again, he doesn’t care anymore. There’s only Taehyung.

Taehyung, Taehyung, Taehyung.

The car stops, and the owner rolls down the window. Yoongi dashes towards it.

“What, you want a ride home? That’s your only use for me?” He asks coldly. Yoongi would be hurt if it weren’t for the fact that the adrenaline pumping through his body at the moment was probably enough to light up the entirety of Makati City.

So he laughs. “Nope. Get the fuck out of that car, Taetae. I’m going to tell you something.”

“What are you saying? Are you drunk? I—”

But both seemed to forget that no matter how quiet the town is, they’re still in the middle of the road.

Another car is speeding towards them, and Taehyung panics. If Yoongi gets hit by a car, he wouldn’t be able to forgive himself, so he gets out of the driver’s seat and tackles Yoongi to the side of the road nearest to them.

The car speeds by with the noisiest horn both of them have ever heard.

They’re on the ground—the pavement, actually—and Taehyung is on top of Yoongi, panting hard. “What the fuck were you thinking? You could have died. You could have—”

“I’m in love with you.”

“—easily lost your head with how fast that car was going! You... what?”

Yoongi laughs at him. A real, genuine laugh that neither of them has heard for a while. “I’m in love with you, idiot.”

“Are you joking with me?”

“No! I’m in love with you! Truly, madly, deeply fucking in love with you. You’re the most important person to me, Taehyung Kim, I swear to all the gods. I’m sorry I lied. Yes, I avoided you specifically. It was because you made me feel things and I hated that. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done it. And it’s okay if you don’t want to forgive me, or if you don’t feel the same! I just needed to let you know, and—”

Taehyung kisses him.

Taehyung is fucking kissing him, holy shit.

It’s a shitty kiss but none of them mind. What’s important is that it’s a kiss. A kiss on the lips. It’s a fucking kiss.

Taehyung rests his forehead on Yoongi’s. “Do you know how long I’ve waited for this day?”

“We’re both really fucking stupid, aren’t we?” Yoongi smiles, gums showing.

The rain is still pouring, and they’re on the sidewalk, soaking wet.

But it doesn’t matter.

They’ve got each other.

“And that’s basically it. All it took to get these two buttheads to finally admit their feelings was a trip to Batangas.”

The audience cheers.

“Actually, I would like to revise that. All it took was a trip to Batangas, a thunderstorm, sharing a bed, a spoon, and an almost-car-accident to get them where they are now. And not to mention,” the man speaking in front points to himself, “a certain Augusto Kalaw.”

Everyone claps.

It’s been seven years since that trip. Yoongi is 26 and is in law school. Taehyung is 25 and has his artworks featured in art galleries both local and international. Yoongi’s parents did get a divorce, and they’ve been in better terms ever since. Songyi-halmeoni doesn’t look a day older than 60.

Iya founded her own swim school in Taal, and her mother helps her in managing it. Augusto is a sophomore in a prestigious college, pursuing accountancy under a scholarship. Luigi the Siamese fighting fish is long gone, but his legacy lives through the cross-stitch artworks of him sitting in his old empty tank.

And the bootleg Care Bear plushies are in Yoongi and Taehyung’s shared apartment.

“I think Kuya Yoongi felt a little dumb back then because he listened to some random 12-year-old's advice, but I think it all went pretty well. I mean," he continues, pulling a face, "we wouldn't be here today otherwise."

Shouts resound through the hall, and Augusto lets it happen. It makes Yoongi laugh.

"So anyway,” Augusto clears his throat. “Ladies and gentlemen, a toast! To the newlyweds, Kuya Taehyung and Kuya Yoongi!”

“To Taehyung and Yoongi!” The audience says collectively, clinking their champagne flutes together.

Yoongi pulls Taehyung to the center of the reception hall, the younger of the two still clearly flustered. Taehyung is red in the face, covering it with his hands like he’s either trying not to laugh or trying not to cry.

Their matching blue sapphire rings are beautiful, but Yoongi thinks Taehyung is still more beautiful and much more valuable.

“I love you.” Yoongi says quietly.

“I love you, too.” Taehyung responds.

There’s no world out there in which Yoongi never met Taehyung.

That's what Yoongi thinks.

After all, Taehyung is his kaulayaw.