Chapter Text
The sun started to hide between buildings as Peter got ready to patrol his neighbourhood. The homework for next day was done and a long, peaceful dinner with May eaten. That meant he could swing around the city for the next few hours without any unnecessary interruptions.
He was really excited for an evening like that but, as it often happens, his plans were changed with a single message.
“Peter” Karen got his attention when he was still in earshot of his apartment building, “the Bad Habits protocol was activated.”
The boy landed on a nearby roof gracefully. Apparently he was going the wrong way.
“The report states over 60 hours without sleep as well as need for hydration and nutrition.”
“60 hours?” Peter did the calculation quickly, “So he hasn’t slept since I last saw him? Oh boy… Looks like we have a tough mission today. City or Upstate? Do we need transport?”
“Manhattan apartment since 3PM today. Should I plot the route?”
“You read my mind, Karen” Peter jumped off the building as directions that he already knew by heart appeared in front of him.
***
Peter’s knowledge and skills together with Stark technology meant he could hack his suit without any bigger problems. Although, the many lectures on safety from his father made him reluctant to change the features and functions of Spider-Man suit again without a good reason. Instead he found a better way of testing himself and doing something useful.
FRIDAY and Karen had a connection which allowed Tony to keep an eye on the teen and alarmed him of any safety protocols that had been activated. Peter discovered that he could easily use the connection the opposite way. Implementing few extra protocols into FRIDAY took him less than studying for a spanish quiz.
The Bad Habits protocol was one of them and the first one to ever be activated. It was time for test ride.
***
Swinging through the city at his top speed left him breathless when he reached the roof garden of the penthaus. He stumbled inside greeting FRIDAY and grabbed two water bottles before directing his steps to the workshop downstairs.
Tony was surrounded by papers and coffee mugs. His hair was greasy and his clothes rumpled. Mechanic’s hands moved frantically around the creation in front of him. The bloodshot eyes looked up at Peter as the boy cleared his throat.
“Pete? What are you doing here, kid?” his voice showed clear signs of tiredness as he straightened up his back.
“I heard you were in the city, thought I would swing by, say hello” Peter tried to act casual as he handed the man an open water bottle with a smile and drunk from the other one himself.
“You heard, huh?” Tony looked at ceiling suspiciously before taking a sip of water reluctantly, “Wonder what else you heard.”
“Well... There might have been something about a meeting tomorrow morning? Important one, apparently, if you haven’t slept since Monday because of it.”
“Okay- I don’t know how you found out, but excuse me. I stayed up because of a different thing entirely- And then today I realised the meeting was tomorrow. Well, Pep asked if I remembered and I lied. I wouldn’t need three days to impress some old ass-” Tony said with a roll of his eyes, but Peter didn’t let him finish.
“Oh, come on, Dad” he sat down on the desk. “What is this? Old man acts like he is still in college? Dorm life 101? Should I be taking notes for future?” Peter wrinkled his nose “Ew- I’m supposed to be the smelly teen. You need a shower. Right now. Then we will eat dinner and you will take a nap” Peter put all his confidence into this little rant, but it didn’t change much.
“No no no. Thanks for the gesture kid, but I really don’t have time for that today. I bailed on this guys twice already and it’s gonna be a PR hell if I do it again. Seriously Peter. You can hang around but I have work to do” Tony tried to focus on his desk.
“Daaad” Peter whined with irritation. “You know what they say about oxygen masks on planes, right? First, you have to take care of yourself. Then you can help others. Simple as that.”
Tony seemed very confused, “Sorry kid, I’ve never been on a commercial flight. I don’t think they say that on private planes” he scratches his beard. “At least I’ve never heard it. Well, I don’t really listen to what they say anyway.”
“It’s a metaphor, Dad. Ugh. You know what I mean” Peter stood his ground, not mentioning the fact that he had never been on a commercial flight either.
“They give metaphorical life lessons on commercial flights? Man, I’ve been missing out.”
“I’m not joking Dad. This is your last chance. For real” the teen did his best serious face, but the man only huffed at him.
“Let it go, Pete. Better skedaddle out of here. For real.”
“Well, if that’s how you want to do it-” Peter made a heavy pause but Tony still didn’t pay him any attention. “FRIDAY, activate the Sleep Tight Protocol.”
The workshop turned dark and silent as all the computers, machines and lamps around the room turned off. Tony slowly blinked in the dim light falling in through the windows.
“What the hell did you just do” it wasn’t even a question. The man looked at his son and took a deep breath. “Turn it back on, Peter. I need to work.”
“No, you need to eat and sleep. Come on” the boy jumped of his place at the desk and strode towards the exit with too much energy, like he didn’t just swing through half of New York City few minutes earlier.
“I can’t believe you hacked FRIDAY. It feels like treason. And what’s the point? I can just hack back in and delete that ridiculous protocol” Tony reached for his phone, but a web snapped it out of his reach.
“I left traps Dad. Duh. Hacking in will take you at least an hour. Just take a break, eat something and I will unlock it” Peter’s head was sticking out sideways from the doorframe. “Maybe take a shower first. You smell. I’ll make some food.”
“My own son. Locking me out of my workshop. Using the AI I created against me. Unbelievable” Tony murmured before getting up grudgingly.
He could use a break. An hour wouldn’t kill him.
***
An hour later Tony laid unconscious in his bed as Peter stood above him and studied the man’s peaceful face. He rarely saw his dad asleep, since he was the first one to go to bed usually. Peter made a mental note to change that as he calculated the dose of sleeping pills once more in his head, making sure it wasn’t too much.
“FRIDAY, monitor his vitals and alert me if anything changes” he said without a break and pulled the covers up to Tony’s chin.
“Of course, Peter. What about the Sleep Tight protocol in the workshop?”
“Password: Don’t Let The Spider Bite. Let’s get to work. What do you know about the meeting tomorrow?”
***
It was close to midnight when Peter’s work was interrupted by a call. He found his father’s phone under the papers and smiled at the caller photo before answering.
“Hi Pep! How are you? And where are you?”
“Peter? Hi-” there was a moment when the woman must’ve checked if she was calling the right number. “Why aren’t you with May? And please tell me you aren’t binge watching something with Tony again…”
“Nope. I just came around to have dinner with Dad and stayed for the night.”
“So he ate something? That’s great. He has a big meeting in the morning so please don’t distract him. I’m in LA for few days and- Is it midnight already at home? You should be in bed, Pete! I hope you aren’t missing school again, huh? I’ve talked with your father about it, he can’t keep taking you out of classes for no reason.” There was a calming breath before she spoke again, “So why are you answering Tony’s phone? Everything okay at home?”
“Of course! Nothing to worry about. Nope. Everything ready for the meeting.”
“Okay” she didn’t seem convinced. “Well, don’t stay up late, Petey. See you next week. ”
“Night!” the teen responded and ended the call before opening a new energy drink.
It took Pepper some time to realise that Peter never told her why Tony didn’t answer the phone himself.
***
When James Rhodes agreed to make sure that Tony will get to the meeting on time, he knew right away it wouldn’t go smoothly. The event was supposed to start at 8am and who even planned it that way? It was an ungodly hour for Stark. Did they want to make it hard for him on purpose?
Arriving at his friend’s penthouse an hour early, he was ready to find him asleep and with no clue about the meeting. Instead he walked in to see Peter hunched over a bowl of cereal and got hushed before even saying anything.
That left him standing in the middle of the room with furrowed eyebrows and open mouth.
“Do we have to go now? I just need to brush my teeth and then I’m ready” was the only greeting he got.
And if Pepper and Tony could see Peter, all dressed up in a clean pair of jeans and a white button down, a file full of papers clutched under his armpit and a prototype ready to show off in his arms, with those wide brown eyes, blinding smile and a confident stance, they wouldn’t blame him for doing whatever the teen wanted without asking any questions.
***
There was some weird history of a bet and a favor that explained why Tony Stark was so personally engaged in the project, but the details didn’t matter now. The people that he already bailed on twice turned out to be the representatives of NYPD and the prototype he was working on, a reconnaissance drone. Peter quickly realised that the gadget was a bigger and less advanced version of little Droney that lived in his suit. In just seven hours, he was able to get to know all the documentation by heart and finish building an operational prototype, which still left him a whole hour for a power nap. That’s how you do it.
Walking into the conference room full of NYPD Captains, all staring at him disapprovingly, it was easy to feel overwhelmed. They noticed that he was not Tony Stark and huffed with dissatisfaction. Maybe he should’ve worn a suit.
“Is this a joke?” was the first reaction and as Peter explained that Mr. Stark couldn’t attend the meeting because of health issues, there were much more angry comments.
Public speaking wasn’t Peter’s strong side, but he was determined to do it. All he needed to do was act like his father but try to not disrespect the people in the room and everything would be great. Introducing himself as an intern at SI and personal assistant of Mr. Stark didn’t go as well as he planned.
“Sending an intern to a serious meeting” the man in his late sixties looked furious. “How else is Stark going to humiliate us before you realise we should have went to OsCorp straight from the beginning?”
“If I may-” Peter found himself talking through gritted teeth. “OsCorp is a bioengineering company so asking them for reconnaissance gear makes absolutely no sense” he smiled sweetly at the older man. “Mr. Stark is a busy man and his health isn’t in the best condition. You should have been aware of that before insisting to work with him personally. I would like to start the presentation now, if that’s okay.”
“Let me ask you something, so we know you have any idea what are you talking about” the same man again, to Peter’s irritation. Come on, guys, he still had school that day.
The teen listened and stared at the man in silence after he finished. “I’m sorry, was that the question? The answer to that is in chapter six, page 37 of the documentation, haven’t you read it? I was waiting for a question that would actually require some extra knowledge.”
The man got all red, but before he could open his mouth, a younger woman smiled at Peter and told him to start the presentation, few other people nodding in agreement. The guy didn’t interrupt him again.
And, silently sitting in the back, James Rhodes couldn’t feel prouder of his nephew as he recorded everything.
***
Tony opened his eyes in the dark room as he steered awake for a third time this morning. “FRIDAY, time?”
“It’s 3.47am, boss” came a neutral whisper.
The man turned to his other side. It felt like ages since he woke up the first time this morning. He didn’t want to get up this early, even if he was going to miss the stupid meeting again, but he knew he wouldn’t fall asleep again.
“Open the blinds, Fri. I’m getting up” he said and suddenly, instead of the gentle light he anticipated, he was met with a blinding sun. “What the actual fuck. Did you break Fri? It’s not four in the morning.”
“Sorry, boss. It was part of the Sleep Tight protocol. It’s 11.22am.”
And before Tony got his mind around what just happened, a familiar voice came from the speakers. The man relaxed into the pillows as he listened to his son’s rambling.
“Morning, Dad. Hope you slept well!” was followed by a short chuckle. “Sorry about the trick with time” he didn’t sound even slightly apologetic. “Don’t be mad at FRIDAY about it, it’s not her fault. I know, I know- You’re gonna say that AIs don’t have feelings, but we both know you made her better than that” Tony just rolled his eyes and smiled at the ceiling. “Don’t worry about the meeting, I have everything under control. I’m your intern after all, I can handle it. Fri taught me everything I need to know and the prototype is almost ready. I’ve got this” it seemed like Peter needed to hear it himself. “Maybe I’ll see Captain Holt, haha. That’s a morning Brooklyn99 reference for you. We still need to finish the last season! You have no idea what-” the kid stopped, took few deep breaths, mumbled “Not important right now” and cleared his throat before continuing. “I assumed you wouldn’t want me to test my IV injection skills at you so you’re really dehydrated right now. I left a water bottle by your bed, together with some painkillers, but don’t take them if you don’t need them” sure enough, there was a bottle and pills at his bed stand. “You also need to have a good breakfast. I already told FRIDAY what to order for you so it’ll be there in half an hour after this message. Nice, huh?” the boy sounded very proud of himself and Tony couldn’t help but smile. “And about your phone- You’ll get it back later today, don’t worry. Just take the morning off and relax, Dad. Spider-Man’s orders. I’m going back to Queens after school, but I’m gonna make an educated guess that I’ll see you today. Tomorrow. Today” the man could almost hear the eye roll. “See you later. Love you, Peter” Tony thought the recording ended, but then, “You probably knew it was me all along, right? You should have known- Didn’t you? Well, that’s awkward. But it was me, Peter. Your son Peter? You know- The only one? Yep, I’m gonna stop now. Bye.”
Tony listened for few more seconds, but this time the recording ended for real. His exhausted groan turned into a chuckle halfway through.
***
“Where is that little punk?” Tony was waiting right by the penthouse’s entrance and looked into the elevator when only Rhodey walked out.
“The amazing son of yours made me pick up his backpack from Queens and drive him to school, just in time for math- Or was it chem?” James walked by him and sat down on the couch.
“He is so dead when I see him” the man said without any real anger and joined his friend. “Don’t you have my phone by any chance? Squirt sent quite few messages in my name when I was out. May, Pepper, his school- The list goes on.”
“Oh yeah” the device was thrown onto his lap, “I’ve sent you the video already.”
“What video?” Tony asked cautiously, did he even want to know?
“From the meeting. Your kid kicked ass. You need to see that sass when he basically called one of them an idiot. It was priceless” Rhodey seemed too excited for the others man liking.
“Are we just gonna ignore that he drugged me?”
“To be honest- Everybody that cares about you tried it sooner or later to make you sleep. And he succeeded on his first go! What a kid! Huh. Your kid, obviously.”
“He made FRIDAY lie to me! I woke up at eight but she told me it was 3am so I went back to sleep. And then every time I woke up again, she said that only few minutes passed. I laid in bed till eleven sure it wasn’t even four!”
Rhodey couldn’t help but snicker as Tony got irritated but was also clearly proud of his kid.
“You have a son, Tones. You need to take care of yourself. Unless you want him to follow your example and web around the city half asleep. Come on, man. He looks up to you.”
“He is smarter than that. And I wouldn’t let him. There are protocols for that.”
“Protocols won’t help when he needs his dad. If you’re not taking care of yourself, how can Peter trust you to take care of him?”
Tony leveled his friend with a calm look before getting up.
“He only slept an hour today, he shouldn’t be in school right now” he said and picked up car keys. “You coming, Uncle Rhodey? My kid had his first business meeting today, we’re gonna celebrate. And sleep. And punish him just a tiny bit so he won’t do it again.”
“Sounds like a plan” Rhodey chuckled before following Tony.
“Did I ever tell you about the time I drugged Howard’s coffee with laxatives? I was eight or nine or something like that.”
“I’m guessing he wasn’t happy?”
“Well, that’s the best part, he never found out it was me. I know my kid drugged me and I’m gonna take him out of school to have lunch. I’m a cool dad. Yep. That’s how parenting works my friend, take notes.”