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“What’s wrong? Did you two argue or something?" Jackson asks Daniel when they get home from school and Ilya goes straight up towards his room. "He’s been like this since Monday.”
“No, we didn’t. But I think he argued with a friend. He didn’t want to tell me but his eyes were kind of red, there’s obviously been some drama going on.”
“Some drama? That’s all you know?”
“Well, yeah. He said that Marc was an asshole and that he didn’t want to talk about it. So, we didn’t talk about it,” Daniel says matter-of-factly.
“If you wanna find out, you’ll have to ask him yourself,” Daniel asks heading towards the kitchen.
“Wow, such a relief to know that I can count on you…” Jackson shakes his head.
“You can…” Daniel opens the fridge and gets the milk before closing it again, “it’s not my fault he doesn’t want to tell me.”
“Sure.” Jackson nods.
“You can always wait for dad to get home, you know?” Daniel fills a mug with milk.
“I think I can speak with a nine year old all by myself, thank you very much. Pass me the milk,” Jackson points at the bottle. “I’m sure he’s hungry too.”
Jackson opens the cupboard and looks for the blue mug with the Superman symbol. Then he finds a small plate and grabs the Oreos box, leaving four cookies on the plate. Finally, he places everything on a tray and heads upstairs.
Jackson knocks on the door and hears a “Yes?” from the other side.
“It’s me.”
“I’m busy.”
“I’ve brought you some cookies.”
“Okay — fine,” Ilya says reluctantly.
Jackson opens the door and Ilya is sitting at his desk looking very serious. That’s not his son’s usual expression, that’s for sure. He’s got his husband’s smile and sense of humor. He’s always been an optimistic and happy kid. The fact is that no bullying or hearing problems have ever held him back, and that’s something Jackson is very proud of.
Jackson comes into the room and leaves the tray on the left side of the desk, the only space that isn’t full of books, notebooks, markers and a lot of other things that say a lot about the kid who sits in the chair in front of it.
Jackson takes a seat on the bed and pats the space next to him. “Come here.”
“Do I have to?”
“Yes, you have to.”
Ilya rolls his eyes exactly the way that Stiles does, making Jackson smile, but obeys nonetheless, getting up and sitting sideways next to Jackson.
“Stop looking at me like I’m trying to murder you and tell me what is going on.”
“Nothing.” Ilya shakes his head. “Nothing is going on.”
“Come on, you’ve been like this for days… and I’ve tried — no, we have tried to give you time to tell us what’s happened but you haven’t and there’s this sadness coming from you that—”
“Don’t do that, okay? Don’t use your… wolf abilities or whatever to—”
Jackson snorts… “Hey, it’s not my wolf abilities, okay? It’s my dad abilities, actually. Something your dad and I have, and we’re both worried… so, you’re going to tell me right now. Your brother said it has something to do with Marc, so what the hell happened?”
“He had no right to tell you anything.”
“You’re wrong, this is not some big secret… and believe me, I’ve had a few of those. Besides, when your father asks you a question, you answer… hopefully with the truth. And your brother didn’t know much, so that’s also why I’m here right now… asking you.”
“If I tell you, you’ll think it’s stupid. I know it.”
“I would never think that.”
“Sure… You never had to deal with this stuff.”
“And how do you know what I had to deal with?” Jackson frowns.
“How? Because I’ve heard the stories.”
“What stories?” Jackson shrugs.
“You know… you in high school?" Ilya raises his eyebrows. "How you were the captain of the Lacrosse team and the swimming team… Do I need to go on?”
It’s easy to imagine who told him about that… most probably Daniel or Scott rather than Stiles.
“Yeah, I was the captain… later co-captain... so what? That was a long time ago.”
“I meant that…” Ilya hesitates. “I meant that you were obviously popular. Everybody wanted to be your friend. You had all the friends you wanted—”
“That’s not true,” Jackson interrupts him. “I mean — yes, I was kind of popular and yeah, I loved it… but Danny was the only real friend I had. Everybody else was just… kids I didn’t really get to know. People who I guess wanted to be like me. People who thought I was cool and I loved the fact that they thought that about. Back then I enjoyed being the center of attention, that’s all.”
“But I thought you had lots of friends,” Ilya insists.
“Well, you were wrong. You might find this hard to believe but I wasn’t the nicest and most communicative kid,” Jackson says with sarcasm in his voice. “Soon you’ll realize that friends… real friends are hard to find.”
Ilya nods but stays silent.
“Did you argue with Marc then? Last time I heard he was one of your best friends.”
“I don’t know,” Ilya admits avoiding his father’s eyes, looking dejected. “I thought so… but we’re not friends anymore.”
Jackson is not sure what to say at first. He waits but finally speaks when his son doesn’t provide more information.
“Are you going to tell me what happened?”
Ilya snorts a laugh, shaking his head. “I don’t know. I can’t tell you because I don’t know.” It would be funny if it didn’t hurt so much.
“What do you mean you don’t know?”
“Just that. He won’t tell me. I’ve asked him a few times but he won’t tell me.” Ilya shrugs.
“Why not?” Jackson frowns.
“I wish I knew. Because he’s stupid, I guess. He’s stupid and childish, and I never saw it before.” Ilya is silent for a few seconds before he continues. “I mean, just last weekend I was sleeping at his house… we went to the movies. We went skating on Sunday… and then, the next day, he just stops talking to me. Just like that. He stops. Like we haven’t been friends for two years...” Ilya’s voice breaks and tears start filling his eyes before he can stop it. “Like he never—” Ilya covers his face with his hands, elbows on his knees, unable to finish the sentence.
Seeing his son in pain breaks Jackson’s heart in pieces. He wishes he could find Marc and give him a piece of his mind, but he knows it wouldn’t really solve anything… and of course, Ilya would be upset with him.
“So, nothing weird happened between you two over the weekend?” Because that’s the only thing Jackson can think about.
“No, nothing. That’s why I don’t understand it.” Ilya looks back at him again with red eyes. “I’ve thought about it a million times. I can’t stop thinking about it. I keep replaying the whole weekend in my mind… but I can’t think of anything… I just… I don’t get it, dad. And the worst thing is that I miss him every day. Every time something happens I want to tell him and then I remember I can’t do it anymore. And then I start thinking about what I did. Why he doesn’t care about me. I wonder why he doesn’t like me anymore… what is wrong with me?… I—”
“Hold on, nothing…” Jackson shakes his head. “Absolutely nothing is wrong with you, do you hear me? If Marc doesn’t want to be your friend, it’s his loss. I know you cared about him and I know it hurts right now but if he’s treating you this way he doesn’t deserve a second thought from you. The only thing he deserves is to be treated the same way he’s treating you and believe me, life has a way of giving you what you deserve.”
“Yes… but maybe I did something. I don’t know what I did… I really want to know.”
Jackson can see the frustration in his son’s face and voice and it’s heartbreaking. Ilya always wears his heart on his sleeve, so Jackson Is not surprised that he’s behaving this way.
“I understand why you do, but you have to stop that. Even if you had done something, that’s not an excuse for his behavior. You tried, you wanted to fix things and he didn’t care… hell, that kind of person doesn’t deserve a friend like you.”
Jackson sees the tears in his son’s face and sighs.
“Listen to me — are you listening?”
Ilya smiles briefly and nods. That sentence is so his dad. “Yeah.”
“The reality is that people are weird. You can’t expect to understand why most people do what they do. That will only drive you crazy. So, the sooner you learn that, the happier you will be. And you know, it doesn’t always have to be a bad thing. Many times people will surprise you for the better.” It just sucks that his son has to deal with the other side of that reality first.
“You know…” Jackson continues. “We are all different. There’s nobody else in this world like you. Your personality, your sense of humor, your intelligence, how you care about people… you have all these qualities that make you who you are. You are unique, okay? And what I want you to remember is that only those people who can appreciate all that deserve to be part of your life. Never let anybody make you feel like you are any less than what you are. Because you are amazing…” Jackson rests his hand on his son’s shoulder, squeezing lightly. “There’s so much of your dad in you.” Jackson smiles and bites his lip. “God, you’re so brave and smart… and talented… Everybody who knows you, knows that… so please, stop thinking about this stupid kid.” Jackson runs a hand through Ilya’s hair. “Promise me. You’re better off without him.”
“Dad…”
“Just promise me,” Jackson insists.
“Fine. I promise.” Ilya licks his lips.
“Good.” Jackson nods. Hopefully something of what he said got into his son’s brain. With kids, you never know.
“Is dad your best friend?” Ilya blurts, catching Jackson by surprise.
“Well,” Jackson licks his lips, running a hand through his hair as he thinks how to answer exactly. The truth is that friendship is not what he thinks about when he thinks about Stiles.
“Your dad… that’s not… I mean… sure, he’s my best friend but he’s more than that. He’s my partner. My mate. That’s why we got married. The way I love your dad is not the way you love a friend…” Jackson smiles. “Uncle Danny, the pack… they are my best friends. I’ve known them for a long time, and I know I can trust them. I know they care about me and about you and your brother... But your dad… the bond we have is totally different. It’s so much stronger… do you know what I mean?”
Ilya nods but doesn’t say anything.
“Good. Is there anything else you want to tell me... or ask me?”
“Not really,” Ilya shakes his head.
Jackson stares at his son for a few seconds, trying to figure out if he’s being honest and also wondering if there is something else he should have said. Even if he has another son, both children are very different and he’s learning fast that they are curious about different things. He’s supposed to feel more confident at this point but the fear of not saying the right thing is always going to be there, especially with a smart kid like Ilya. All he can hope is that he’s planted the seed in his mind and that he’ll remember it.
“Okay, then,” Jackson says, getting up. “I’ll let you do your homework if that’s what you want to do, but I’d like you to come downstairs and watch some TV with us…” It’s most likely that if Ilya stays here, he’ll just start thinking about that kid again. He knows his son all too well.
“I will. I just… I want to do some stuff first,” Ilya says, getting up.
Before Jackson realizes, his son is hugging him and Jackson is holding him tight against him. There is certain calmness and even something that feels like relief coming from Ilya and it settles Jackson’s wolf.
“Thanks, dad.”
Jackson smiles, running his hand through Ilya’s hair. “Anytime.”
After a few seconds, Ilya lets go of him and sits back at the desk.
“Okay, we’ll be waiting for you then,” Jackson says, stepping out of the room and closing the door behind him.
“Thanks for the cookies,” Ilya says.
Jackson smiles as he goes down the stairs. He still wishes he could kill that kid but, apart from that, he did a pretty good job, didn’t he?