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Draco sat staring out of his bedroom window in total misery. He was trapped inside his room, while wolves paraded around the grounds like they owned the place. One of the first things the animals did when they descended on the Manor was to eat father’s prize white peacocks like it showed their dominance over the defenseless creatures. He supposed that Draco and his parents were the white peacocks under the Dark Lord’s rule and Fenrir Greyback was reminding them of their place.
His father’s fall from grace wasn’t just losing his home and sense of security, it was going to cost him his sanity soon. He loss of his magic, his name, and his power wasn’t what concerned Draco. Though they were things his father coveted above all else, Draco was worried about his father’s ability to survive this war. Over breakfast, his father was crucioed so long that they had to call a Healer to revive him.
The Dark Lord wasn’t just a dark cloud over the Manor. He lived in their home. He was a constant companion for meals and could be found during the afternoon perusing the famed Malfoy library. One would think that his constant presence would diminish Draco’s utter terror of him, this couldn’t be more wrong. Draco found that walking down a hallway to find the Dark Lord in the corner you skinned your knees flying a toy broom when you were three, was more terrifying than anything a boggart could create.
As a gift to his mother for her birthday in August, she had been allowed to request one wish of him. The Death Eaters around the table had cackled in her direction, leering as she spoke without even taking a moment to breathe or think about her request. “If it pleases my Lord, I would beg that Draco be allowed to finish his education. No Malfoy or Black heir has ever left Hogwarts without their N.E.W.T.s and I would ask that Draco return so he could be better educated and then be better prepared to serve you my Dark Lord.”
The room had gone abruptly quiet and his father pale. Draco was stunned. Everyone had expected her to beg on his father’s behalf, to ask for clemency. Based on the Dark Lord’s quizzical look, he had expected it as well.
All eyes were on the Dark Lord as he slid his bony pale fingers over Nagini’s head. Draco felt his mother’s fingers slip over his in an attempt to calm his shaking body. Her steely blue eyes were trained on the Dark Lord’s empty plate in front of him. Keeping her eyes trained in front of him she showed strength, by not meeting his face she displayed her subservience to the Dark Lord. They were both pleasing to him.
“An unusual request Narcissa, however, you are a Black. It should be expected at this point,” he paused and leaned back in his chair. Nagini slithering off of the table and coiling herself around the Dark Lord possessively. “I do agree with you though, Draco will return to Hogwarts. One does have to wonder why you did not ask for a pardon for your husband.” The Dark Lord looked at her pointedly.
“I am merely a servant of the Dark Lord. I do only as he wishes,” his mother bowed her head in servitude as Draco tried in vain to cease his body’s involuntary shaking. “I would never presume to undermine the Dark Lord or question his judgment.”
The Dark Lord laughed. It was a raspy noise that raised the hair on his arms and sounded like it came straight out of darkest depths of hell. “I almost want to resurrect your dear departed mother so she could sire more lovely daughters for me.”
That night his parents went into their room and fought. Draco knew only because there were silencing charms erected. He lingered in the hallways for several hours until he heard the slam of their door and his father’s thundering footsteps down the hallway. Draco lept from behind the tapestry he was hiding and hurried into his mother’s room the moment he heard his father’s study door slam shut.
His mother sat on her bed staring off into the distance. “I’m so sorry mother.”
She blinked in surprise to find him standing there. “Oh Draco, I didn’t hear you come in. Is everything alright?”
“Mother, it’s okay-” he was silenced by his mother’s small and frail fingers ghosting up the side of his face.
“My dear strong and brave Draco. It is not your duty to protect your parents, but our duty to shield you. Your father and I,” her voice cracked and Draco’s heart beat rapidly in his chest. “Your father and I failed you, my son. We failed to protect you and I will regret it until the day I die.”
Leanings so she was eye level with him, she placed a soft kiss on his each of his cheeks and then his forehead. His eyes stung and began to swim. “I love you, my son.”
The next morning he was off to Hogwarts via Floo through Headmasters Snape’s office. Mother had a message from the Dark Lord that needed to be hand delivered.
Draco thought it was a carefully orchestrated ruse to avoid him taking the Hogwarts Express. There were whispers that the Order was planning an attack on the train, in order to take Death Eater’s children captive.
“Good morning Draco,” Professor Snape drawled without looking up from his desk. Draco peered around the room, it was a lot less cluttered than when Professor Dumbledore had been Headmaster. There were simple furnishings and no elaborate carpets or trinkets. The lack of odd muggle sweets littering the desk didn’t escape Draco’s notice either.
An amusing image of Professor Snape secretly hoarding muggle sweets filled his mind and Draco held back a snort.
“If you’re quite done obsessing over my eating habits, you’ll find lunch is set up in the Great Hall and several of your acquaintances are present.” Draco nodded and walked towards the door while his mother emerged from the Floo.
Professor Snape set down his quill and stood to join her. “Cissa, are you well?”
Draco hid behind the descending steps listening intently, “Well enough, Severus.”
“The Carrow twins spoke of-”
“My problems with Greyback are none of your concern Severus,” his mother snapped. There was silence for several moments. Casting a silent charm on the wall he was hiding behind, Draco looked through the now, one-way mirror.
Professor Snape was leaning intimately close to his mother over the hearth. He tucked a stray wisp of hair back into her chignon.
“Cissa, please. The Carrow twins have been talking... If there is something going on-”
His mother twisted away from Professor Snape’s touch and walked towards his desk, “There is nothing you can do Severus. The beast is patrolling the Manor on the Dark Lord’s orders. It’s his way of taunting Lucius and reminding Draco of his place.”
Sitting in his chair, she conjured a tea set for herself and busied herself making tea. Professor Snape sat in the front of the desk watching her intently. She was in the middle of mixing the sugars when her hand began to shake rattling the teacup.
“Narcissa,” he whispered, folding his hand delicately over hers. Draco had to blink twice as he had never witness Professor Snape do anything that resembled tenderness. “We’ve been friends since Hogwarts. Please let me help you.”
His mother covered her tearing eyes in her hands. “I can’t. Lucius already begged him to remove Greyback from the grounds and he allowed the monster into the house. It’s all I can do to keep him away from Draco.”
“Cissa, he hates Lucius right now. If I ask-”
“No. I won’t become a bargaining chip for four of his followers. My actions already hold the lives of two that I love dearly, I cannot hold a third.”
Professor Snape straightened immediately, his eyes dark with fury. “Greyback asked for you?!”
Tears streamed down his mother’s eyes, “Yes, many times. My sister is the reason he hasn’t been given what he wants. The… the Dark Lord made certain I was unable to conceive and I… Severus I think he knows about Draco.”
Professor Snape ran his hands through his hair. “He had a Healer test, Lucius?”
“Yesterday and then he killed the Healer afterward,” Mother whispered softly. She stood and followed Professor Snape as he began to pace nervously on the maroon carpet in front of his desk. “We both know what the Healer found.”
“Has he approached you about the subject in any way?” he asked sternly. He spoke in tone Draco was used to for some reason, it felt out of place with how he was treating his mother so far. The two were familiar with each other and Draco was surprised to see so many new expressions on his Head of House’s face.
“No,” she whispered. “But he only had the Healer arrive yesterday after dinner. She was overseen by Bella and Rodolphus. The results were given to him directly.”
“Are Bella and Rodolphus aware of the… situation?”
“Yes, but I doubt they know of your involvement. I believe Bella was aware from the very beginning. She was present for…” his mother’s voice faltered and her hand strayed to her heart as if it was hurting her. “She was present for the first four.”
Professor Snape stopped his pacing and squeezed her shoulder. “We need to treat this carefully, you are in danger Cissa.
“You’re right Severus,” her hand covered his own still placed on her shoulder. “We cannot be seen together until he finds something else to occupy his thoughts.”
“I am not worried about him finding out about me, I’m more worried that he will think the worst. If he attempts legilimency do not resist.”
Professor Snape let go of her shoulder and held her hand in silence for several moments. Their friendship was an old one and Draco could feel the strength of their bond from where he stood. “Can I convince you to remain here for the afternoon? At least until the students arrive? It will give you a reprieve from being stalked by Greyback.”
“Lucius is alone in the Manor. I can’t… he doesn’t have magic, Severus.”
“I know, but Bella is there. As much as she hates your husband, she hates half-breeds and werewolves more.” His mother stared back at the letters on his desk before looking up at him curiously. “Stay the afternoon, Cissa.”
His mother stood abruptly and turned her back on Professor Snape. Draco could see the panic etched in his Professor’s face. She stood silently, staring at the empty portrait above the Headmaster’s desk.
“You asked Dumbledore to leave?” she asked curiously. Draco’s breath caught in his throat.
“Yes, I didn’t think Draco would want a reminder of that night. Greyback killed two second years that were in the middle of sneaking back into the Hufflepuff Common Room. They had just come from raiding the kitchens. The only reason he didn’t rampage through the entire house was that the eldest Weasley pulled him out of their doorway and was able to distract him. The prefects were able to close the door and prevent what would have been a massacre.”
Eyebrows raised she asked, “Have you put anti-werewolf wards on the common rooms?”
Professor Snape shrugged. “Yes, all of them.”
“Are you anticipating a battle?” she asked in alarm.
“I’d be foolish not to. The boy will be back and when he comes he’ll bring the fight with him.”
Draco’s mother waved her hand towards the desk. “We will stand with you, whatever you choose.”
Professor Snape snorted. “Could you actually see Lucius-”
“Lucius does what I tell him to and rarely takes any convincing. It’s when I am unaware of what he is doing that our family gets in trouble,” standing over his desk she set several of his papers on fire. “I will help you re-write that after my tour of the school. As a benefactor, I am concerned about the safety of the school.”
Draco canceled the charm and hurried down the stairs before he was caught. Professor Snape and his mother were friends at Hogwarts? His mother was a year older than his professor and she had never mentioned that they were friends.
Draco spent most of September and October mulling over the words spoken between his mother and Headmaster. Given the sensitive nature of their conversation and that it was always on his mind he was especially careful with his Occlumency wards at all time.
November bled into December with only Potter’s Gryffindor friends making trouble to disturb the year. Hogwarts felt like a mausoleum. No, worse than a mausoleum. Younger students were used as guinea pigs for older students to practice spells on. If the older students happened to have been Pureblooded children of Death Eaters they were allowed to practice unforgivables on students and their familiars.
During the first week of November, Draco stumbled across a first year Hufflepuff sobbing into sightless orange and white tabby cat. Astoria Greengrass stood over her, rubbing her back soothingly and telling her it was going to be okay. Draco met Astoria’s eyes and motioned for her to get a move on, the Carrow’s were patrolling that night.
If anyone liked to use unforgivables it was those two demented freaks.
The thing about war was that you learned what the true character of a person was. More than one Ravenclaw and Gryffindor turned their wand on their fellow housemates to protect their own skins. It was the way of the beast, kill or be killed and that was what the Dark Lord turned them into. Beasts.
Christmas Hols was tomorrow and Draco had been told that under no circumstances was he to come home for the Holiday. He hadn’t planned on going home but then Lovegood made one of her asinine comments about how he stepped in the paw of a wolf on his way back from Herbology, and how it bid ill news for his family on the full moon.
Concerned, he went straight to Professor Snape’s office. The gargoyle sprang open as he approached it and he was surprised to find Professor Snape on his way down the unwinding stairs. “Mister Malfoy, I was just leaving to retrieve you. Follow me. Now,” he barked.
Draco hurried up the stairs, following Professor Snape’s long swishing black robes. He wondered idly how he never tripped on them.
They walked into the office and Draco took a seat in front of Professor Snape’s desk. He stood in front of the desk, his hands thrumming on the hard oak behind him.
“I have sent an elf to fetch your things.”
Draco paled. He was being called home.
There were so many reasons he would be called home. If the Dark Lord called on him to join the Death Eater ranks and serve actively. He’d have to…. He’d be expected kill and torture people. Draco felt his toes tingle as the very blood left his body.
What if he wasn’t expected to fight? What if his parents-
“Merlin, Draco sit up. Your parents are alive and to the best of my knowledge, the Dark Lord wants you at Hogwarts studying. Last I heard, he had plans to put you in the Ministry to oversee his political party and ensure that the Wizengamot follows his ideals.” Draco looked up to see Professor Snape crouching on the floor in front of him, his normally cold eyes filled with concern. “Draco breathe. If you don’t breathe you are going to pass out.”
Deep obsidian eyes met terrified silver ones. “My mother-”
“Is well for the time being.”
“Than why-”
“The Lestranges have been called away for the holidays. There is to be a round-up of children whose parents are… disturbing the peace. Greyback will be left alone paroling your home. Need I remind you that your father cannot use magic?”
His mother’s conversation with Severus filled his mind. Dread filled him as he felt his lunch threaten to resurface.
Mother was alone with a cannibalistic werewolf that fancied her.
“Is he going to try and hurt her?”
“No more than he already has in the past. However, without your aunt and uncle as a buffer, he may become… out of control. You need to go home, Draco. You need to go home and protect your parents.”
Draco stood, “When do I leave?”
“Tonight during dinner, return to my office the password is Albus. You will take the Floo directly to your father’s study. He alone is aware of your trip. You are recorded to have been staying at Hogwarts for the duration of the year including holidays. You are not expected at home for the holidays. I would have sent you on the express tomorrow morning but then you would have lost the element of surprise, something your father is keen on.”
“My father asked for me to return home?”
Snape curled his lip in disgust, “Your father… requested your presence in October. I denied his request however the current circumstances has proved that you do in fact need to return.”
Draco straightened his robes smartly. His occlumency shields were strengthened as his mind ran through dozens of scenarios and questions he had swirling around his head since he overheard Professor Snape and his mother talking on September the first.
He stood to leave, his cowardice winning out. How could he even ask the questions that kept him up at night in the Slytherin dormitory? Surely, Professor Snape would Avada him if he asked what was on his mind.
The door opened and the stairs were descending when he couldn’t take the pressure and indecision any more. “Professor?”
“Yes.” Draco turned around to see all the portraits looking forward in anticipation.
“Are you in a relationship with my mother?”
Professor Snape’s only reaction was to raise one eyebrow. “Draco, what would give you that idea?”
“I overheard the two of you speaking the day I arrived for the term.” To say Professor Snape was unsettled was an understatement. His eyes went wide and he gripped his wand.
“What,” his voice shook as his usual waxy complexion had taken on a pale sickly yellow hue. “Exactly did you overhear?”
“Enough to know that you and my mother are closer than you let on. Why lie?” Draco saw the portrait of Phineas Nigellus Black, shaking his head dejectedly. Had he said something wrong? “I don’t… I mean, I know how Pureblood marriages work. As long as my mother is happy than I am too.”
Snape’s eyebrows rose into his hairline, “And you think your mother would be happy with me?”
Draco shrugged. “I think my mother values my life more than her own and she trusts you with me more than my father. If she trusts you and you make her happy, I am fine.”
Snape gulped audibly and Draco could feel his occlumency shields being pressed against. “Professor Snape, it really is fine. You don’t have to use legilimency to assure yourself.”
“What about your father?”
“My father has always and will always worry about himself first. I had the best of everything because it would look negative on his character as a father if he didn’t indulge on his only son. My father hasn’t loved my mother since before I was born if he ever did.”
Snape’s eyes narrowed in anger. “Your father has made you feel unloved?”
“No, not unloved. Just… I feel as if because I am older I see things differently. Since he came home from Azkaban I was able to see him for what he was.”
“And that is?”
“A coward. Whoever decided to match my parents were smart, the Malfoy line needed some Black in it and I thankfully take after the Blacks.”
Professor Snape snorted as did Phineas Nigellus Black. Maybe he wasn’t as deserving of the Black name as he thought.
“Your father is a coward about certain things but trust me when I tell you that he loves his son dearly.” Snape looked at him, his eyes fierce with determination. “He would give his life for you, Draco. I know this to be a fact.”
Draco nodded. “Thank you, Professor. Will I see you at Christmas?”
Snape laughed. “No Draco, someone has to protect- Er, I mean watch the students that remain in the castle over the holidays. Several students were not allowed to leave as their parents are being questioned by the Ministry.”
“Merry Christmas, sir.” Draco turned and walked down the winding stairs and out into the hallway. Crabbe and Goyle were standing waiting for him.
“You in trouble with Snape?” Goyle grunted.
Draco rolled his eyes. They owned the school and he was a branded Death Eater, short of murdering the entire student populace there wasn’t much that could get him in trouble. The Dark Lord had even given him permission to Avada any student he deemed unworthy or traitorous. “No, just a new mission. Keeping an eye on Blood Traitors and such. Come on then, I’m hungry let’s go eat lunch.”
Draco wiped the soot off of his robes. His father was sitting in his high wingback chair in front of the fireplace, sipping firewhiskey like he hadn’t damned their entire family.
“You’re late.”
“Crabbe was following me around. Pretty sure someone put him up to it.”
“He followed you away from food during dinner time?” his father asked skeptically.
Draco nodded, “Hence my reasoning for thinking someone put him up to it.”
“Imperious?”
“Most likely.”
“The Carrows?”
“Most definitely.”
“Go say hello to your mother. She is dining alone in the family dinner hall.”
Draco nodded, “Yes, father.”
As he walked out of the study, he thought about Snape’s words. He imagined a father who truly loved him. As the door and his heart closed behind him, he flicked his wand erecting protective wards on them. If only love his father could love as easily as Draco could erect wards or as much as Draco loved him.
A loud wolf’s howl sent Draco barreling down the hallway, taking shortcuts to get to his mother. He flung the doors open of their familial dining hall, his wand raised. The spell was on his lips before he had a chance to think about the ramifications of his actions.
“Crucio!”
Greyback was hovering over his mother, one of his arms pinning her hands down in her lap. The animal was licking his mother’s ear. The spell sent him careening backward into a stained window and straight out of it. Draco walked to the broken window and upon seeing Greyback on all fours grinning through his bloodied teeth like the lunatic he was, he released the spell.
Draco fixed the window before erected anti-werewolf charms all about the family wing. He was just improving his mother’s rooms wards when he heard an angry howl from within the manor. “That will keep him out until I have had a chance to speak to the Dark Lord. I will owl him tonight. Mother?”
His mother was sitting in the very same position he had found her in. She hadn’t moved in an inch. Not even remove her hands from her lap, where Greyback had them pinned.
“Mother,” he whispered softly. When she didn’t respond he kneeled next to her. Slowly he placed a gentle hand over hers much like Severus had done in September. She flinched and her eyes widened as they met his. “Mother it’s okay. I’m here.”
“D-D-Draco?”
“It’s okay. I’m here.” His mother’s eyes widened in fear as comprehension dawned on her face.
“No,” she breathed. “What are you doing here? You’re supposed to be safe. Safe at school with Severus. He swore. He-”
“Mother, your shaking. Let’s get you to your room. You can lay down.” Draco called a house elf and ordered him to get several calming draughts and their family’s private Healer.
Gripping his mother by the elbows he lifted her from her chair and guided her towards the door. They walked slowly down the hallway as Draco calmly listened to her small sounds of distress and her pleas that he return to Hogwarts.
As they neared her bedroom, he saw a figure standing in the doorway. Draco gripped his wand tightly even after recognizing his father. What sort of husband allowed creatures like Greyback to do… Draco’s heart constricted. Husband’s were supposed to protect their wives. Not cower in their studies drinking and hide in fear while their wife was being molested over dinner.
Severus was right. His father was a coward.
“She won’t take the calming draught,” he drawled. “I’ve been begging her for weeks.”
Draco ignored him and elbowed his way past him and into the room. He helped his mother into her rocking chair by the window, murmuring reassurances as he drew the shades obscuring the prowling werewolves from view.
“Mother? I need you to take a calming draught,” his mother protested quietly. “It’s okay. I know you don’t want to. I am going to be here every minute with my wand prepared, okay? A house elf is going to help you bathe but only if you take the draught.”
It took several more minutes of bartering, but finally, his mother agreed and Draco gave her two calming draughts. She visibly sagged from the draughts and he assisted her into the bathroom calling the house elf once she was seated on her chaise in front of her deep ivory bathtub.
Leaving strict instructions with the house elf, Draco left the bathroom and called another house elf to change the sheets and the linen in the room. He then altered the coloring, shape, and size of everything in her private quarters.
“The frames on the mantle.”
Draco scowled at his father. “What?”
“You forgot to change the frames on the mantle.” Draco nodded and changed their color and size. All except for the yellow handcrafted clay frame he made for his mother when he was three. His handprints and footprints were on the back. “Smart, putting aconite in her bath. I tried that in September and she hexed me so I couldn’t use my hands for a week.”
Draco rounded on his father, murder in his eyes. “Don’t you dare make light of the situation.”
“Light? I have to stand by and watch. I am powerless to protect my family. Do you know what it feels like to have to grovel to Severus Snape, of all people? I had to beg him to bring my son home so that he could protect my wife?!”
“A wife, that you should have protected in the first place.” Draco shot back.
His father eye’s darkened in fury. “How dare you!”
“How dare I?” Draco wrenched up his left sleeve. “You did this to me! They branded me! I wasn’t even of age yet! Mother begged you. She begged you to stay out of it, this time. I heard the two of you arguing. Couldn’t help yourself, could you? Power hungry for more glory and tossed the two of us at the wolves while you were safe in Azkaban!”
“Draco, enough!” Draco paled and turned as his mother stood furiously in her nightgown leaning against the closed bathroom door.
Lucius Malfoy sighed, “You’re back?”
“Yes, Lucius I am back. My occlumency walls take some time to come down. The calming draught helped, as did the bath.” She turned to Draco as the house elf busied himself with fixing her hair and applying lotions to her face. “Why are you here? You’re supposed to be at Hogwarts where you are safe.”
Before Draco had a chance to respond a crimson letter shot through the fireplace. It shot into Draco’s hand burning his mark as he opened it. He read it and sighed as it shriveled up and turned to ash.
“The manor is empty, except for the three of us and Greyback’s pack. I wrote to the Dark Lord earlier today about Greyback, made it seem as if he has forgotten his place. I wrote merely as a concerned Pureblood worried about the animal roaming my halls.”
“YOU WHAT?!” both of his parents shouted. The house elf behind mother was clearly distressed as she attempted to give her another calming draught.
“Misty, remove yourself from my sight!” she whirled on Draco. “What in the name of Merlin, would possess you to do something so utterly stupid?”
Draco rolled his eyes, smiling when he felt someone pass the wards of the manor and enter the family suite. He sent Bellatrix, then.
The doors of mother’s room flew open, to admit a smiling Bellatrix. “Good news! Lucius has been redeemed in the eyes of the Dark Lord! He is permitting him the usage of a wand! I brought one with me!”
His father’s knees gave out and he collapsed at the news. Draco stood smiling at his deranged aunt. “Thank you, Aunt Bella.”
Bellatrix outstretched her white long fingers, handing the wand to his father, who took it with shaking hands. “Bella,” he croaked. “How…?”
“Your son wrote to the Dark Lord. Imagine that? Writing a letter to the Dark Lord. Something about werewolves forgetting their place in society. The Dark Lord believes if Greyback, an animal can have a wand so can you, Lucius.” Bella smiled at the three stunned family members. “I have a train to bombard in the morning and then a train station to bombarda.”
His aunt giggled as she flounced out of her sister’s room. Stopping at the door, she threw her head back, “Oh, and Cissy. Clear some more cells in the catacombs. You’re going to be having more guests there tomorrow.”
They were keeping prisoners in the cellars?!
Given his mother’s expression, she wasn’t aware of the situation. Bellatrix slammed the door behind her, leaving a loud vacuum of awkwardness behind her. His father lay on the floor gripping the wand in awe that Bella had given him while his mother stood in horror at the idea of people being held as prisoners in her cellars.
“Draco,” his mother called through clenched teeth. “I’m sure you're exhausted after your trip. I’ll have a house elf bring you dinner to your room. Good night, dear. I look forward to seeing you at breakfast.”
Draco excused himself and hurried to his room. His father was going to be lucky if he had bollocks left by morning he mused to himself, as he ate pudding pie and steak with garlic mashed potatoes. Mitsy snuck Draco several extra slices of pie before he finally fell asleep.
Contrary to his mother’s directive, Draco slept in until noon. When he woke late in the afternoon, he heard shouts coming from the main hall. An argument, from what Draco could tell in his bed, had erupted between several of the Death Eaters about where the prisoners should be put and whether or not they should let one of them keep the sandwich they had in their pocket.
“JUST THROW THEM ALL IN THE SAME CELL AND LET THEM EAT EACH OTHER!” his father roared from the top of their grand staircase. Draco almost laughed. Lucius Malfoy was not a morning person and did not appreciate being woken up before he was good and ready. Draco glanced over at the clock. Apparently, two in the afternoon was still not when he was good and ready.
When Draco was four, his mother spent two months in Saint Mungos in the wing with all the stickers and rattling toys after a nasty fall down the stairs. Draco was only allowed to see her once a week for an hour and only if he was under constant observation from someone that wasn’t the patient. Under regular circumstances, he would have been allowed to stay with his mother every day and with only an elf to keep an eye on him. However, that year there was a nasty bout of Dragon Pox that was affecting children four and under, going around.
As a result of thinking he was going to lose one parent, he clung to the other. It was a situation his father abhorred. Draco came with him everywhere. If he was left behind, he would scream until he turned blue and passed out. Even the aging Great Aunt Walburga wouldn’t take him, which was well as she died before mother was able to come home from the hospital.
Every year during their family Christmas dinner his father would regale them of stories about how he was forced to hex his own son, his heir, for waking him up at six in the morning every day. Draco’s mother would get tense and quiet, every damn year, while his father told his story laughing as if it was the funniest thing in the world. Draco often wondered when his father would realize that his mother hated that story and hated being reminded of that time in general. Draco certainly knew not to bring it up.
Rubbing his eyes, Draco resigned himself to not getting any more sleep. The Dark Lord didn’t just want to him to kidnap, torture, and murder his classmates, he wanted him to get O’s on all of his N.E.W.T.’s as well.
He desperately needed to study.
Slipping on his dressing robe, he slid out of bed and to his study desk where lunch was sitting under stasis charms. He ate while he studied and tried to ignore the wolves howling outside his window.
He would have put up silencing charms but he needed to hear if they got too close to the manor, or if Merlin forbid they tried coming inside. Greyback was furious that he had been denied last night and had forced his entire pack to change even though it wasn’t the full moon. Draco wasn’t even aware it was possible. After searching through the library last night, he found out that it shouldn’t be possible.
Draco had already notified the Dark Lord of the werewolf’s new development. He received a short response insisting that he keep a trained eye on him over Christmas break and send any new details back through Professor Snape when he returned to Hogwarts.
Draco had already written two scrolls on their migration patterns, who he suspected the beta and omegas were, and the weaker wolves in the pack and their weak points as a whole. He had the parchments guarded with blood wards and sealed within his desk.
He took an early dinner with his mother, enjoying the peace and quiet of after-dinner reading and tea in the library. It was their favorite past time and a time in which was only for the two of them.
His father had not joined them at dinner and that was perfectly fine with him. While he tried to see Professor Snape’s point of view, he doubted he ever would.
“Draco, is something wrong?” Draco looked over at his mother. She was looking at him with concern beneath her perfectly powdered exterior. “You’ve been staring at the same page for over ten minutes.”
“I was just wondering, what is the nature of your private relationship with Professor Snape?” his mother’s book slipped from her lap.
He trusted Professor Snape to an extent, but he felt as if there was something he wasn’t being told.
“I beg your pardon?”
“I heard the two of you talking on the first day of the term. I forgot something in his office and I was on my way back to get it when I heard the two of you talking. I confronted him and he confirmed it. Why didn’t you tell me?”
His mother’s eyes were wide with shock, “Draco, I… Severus and I never wanted you to know. Your father only consented because there was no other option and… Draco?”
Draco’s mind was running in flashes of scenes with Professor Snape.
Professor Snape being infuriated when he thought Lucius Malfoy made me feel unloved.
Phineas Nigellus Black commentary, or lack thereof during his conversation with Professor Snape. He was trying to tell Draco something behind the Headmaster’s back.
“Your father is a coward about certain things but trust me when I tell you that he loves his son dearly. He would give his life for you, Draco. I know this to be a fact.” Lucius Malfoy would burn the world around him to save his own hide, not so much his family. Everyone knew that Draco was teased at school because of it. Something Professor Snape put a stop to immediately when he found out.
Mother spent months in the hospital when he was four. The wing that had all the babies in it. Mother never had any other children.
Draco stumbled out of his chair and away from his mother. His mother stood in alarm, trying to follow him. Draco tried and failed to articulate the emotions threatening to drown him.
“You lied to me?” he finally gasped backing away from his slowly advancing mother.
“I had no choice,” she whispered. “Your father cannot conceive, neither could his father. The lines are too intertwined. We tried for five years, but we couldn’t… each one ended in a stay at Saint Mungos.
“Finally we decided to get outside help. The Healers at Saint Mungos were nervous about treating us given our family names, so we… went into the muggle world. Severus helped us. His mother was a Pureblood but his father was a muggle and he grew up in a muggle neighborhood. One of his neighbors became a Muggle healer for women. We went to her, she… she said your father would never be able to have a whole and healthy child. Severus ran several tests on his own and he was the one who confirmed it for your father.”
His mother sunk into the chair next to the door of the library. Her face was dark as she rubbed her hands together nervously.
“Professor Snape and a muggle were the ones who told father that he would never be able to sire a child?” Draco asked.
“Yes,” his mother responded in mild astonishment. “That was all that you-”
“No, but it explains why father hates muggles and Professor Snape.”
“Oh,” she whispered. “I hadn’t realized that he disliked Professor-”
“How did he become my…”
“Severus offered to do a magic bond. It’s an old rite. We would take parts of all three of us to create one healthy whole child. It took two years and Severus worked only for us during that time. The Dark Lord dismissed him from the rest of his duties as producing a male heir for the Malfoy line was of the most importance to your grandfather. He and the Dark Lord were friends since their Hogwarts days together and the Dark Lord was kind to Lucius because of it.”
“What does this mean?”
“Well, umm… I didn’t think you wanted the details-”
“NO! Mother, I wanted to know what Severus is… I… he doesn’t know that I know he’s… whatever he is.”
“Severus loves you and cares for you as much as I do.” Draco leaned against the door thinking of how his father offered him no support, ever. How Professor Snape kept him behind after classes in his first year to make sure he was getting on with all his classes. When he tutored him in his third year when he fell behind in some of his classes after breaking his arm.
The wizard took an unbreakable vow to help him, to watch over him and complete his mission when he couldn’t. Professor Snape saved him from murdering a wizard who had only ever shown him kindness. Professor… Professor….
“Draco, stop!”
His mother was shouting after him as he ran through the halls. He needed to get out. He needed to get out before the walls closed in on him. They were choking him, suffocating him. He needed to get out!
The freezing cold air gave him whiplash as his shoes touched down on icy snow. He felt two sets of werewolf repelling charms settle over him as he ran into the east maze. Protective shields and warming charms kept him safe and warm as he raced through the thickets and branches in only his after-dinner robes.
As Draco turned the corner where his mother’s favorite rose bush lay, he turned his head away. He didn’t want the reminder. He didn’t want to see. Not sure where else to look, he cast his eyes backward at the melted snow footprints he left behind him. When he looked back up, he ran headlong into a fence, scratching his face. Wiping the blood off with his hand, he ignored it and kept running.
Several short minutes later, he was out of breath and collapsed onto the stone bench in the center of the maze. He stared at the tall frozen fountain that stood proudly on the Malfoy grounds before there was a manor. The fountain was a statue of Armand Malfoy, the original Malfoy in England.
Armand arrived with William the Conqueror and was gifted the land in Wiltshire for his services the crown. The fountain and the maze was one of Armand’s first additions to the Manor after it was gifted to him. The fountain itself was marble and in the image of Armand in standard wizarding robes. Out of Armand’s raised wand generally poured water, however since it was winter the wand simply stood in the air shaking in the wind.
Draco hiccupped and wiped tears of steadily growing anger from his face. Hundreds of years and he wasn’t even a Malfoy? He was a just pretend Malfoy, an imposter. A fake.
He didn’t deserve the fountain. He didn’t deserve any of this.
Not the bed he slept in or the new Quidditch gear he received every year for his birthday.
He didn’t-
He didn’t deserve being forced to become a Death Eater to pay for his father’s crimes.
Crimes for a father that wasn’t even his father - or was he?
Anger and rage were boiling in his veins. He looked down at the plaque at the center of the fountain that read their house words, Sanctimonia Vincet Semper. A plaque that had been there longer than Albus Dumbledore had been at Hogwarts.
Something else Draco stole from the world because that’s what he did. He stole things, took things that didn’t belong to him and then was punished for it.
SLAM
Draco’s fist connected with the plaque. A loud resounding crunch echoed through the small clearing, whether it was the plaque or his fist Draco didn’t know or care.
Screw Sanctimonia Vincet Semper .
SLAM
Screw his family for lying to him.
SLAM
Screw the damn Death Eaters for-
Draco stumbled back as the broken bits of plaque lifted in the air and rearranged themselves into a railing. Draco’s wand was pointed in front of him a shield erected between him and whatever was going on with the fountain.
Armand’s statue whirled and swished his wand. The ice in the fountain turned into liquid releasing a great gust of steam. Draco blinked rapidly as he watched the fountain drained itself out onto the ground around him. The outer wall of the fountain slid down causing Draco to jump backward. Armand winked before stepping back to reveal a set of stone steps leading to passage underneath him.
Intrigued, Draco stepped onto what was now a raised platform. Great iron mining sconces lit up on the stairs as soon as Draco descended the first step. Armand shooed him along with his wand, casting a Lumos with his wand Draco walked cautiously down the stairs.
Where did this lead to?
The manor was enormous and Draco prided himself on having explored most of the manor in his youth. Not only had he explored the manor but he used to play blind searching games with his father’s elf, Dobby. He prided himself on being able to find his way through the manor with a blindfold and no sense of hearing or smell.
With all that talent, he had absolutely no idea where he was. Wherever he was it was definitely part of the house based on the familiar designs on the moldings. They matched father’s ‘secret’ library and parts of the attic that were completely closed off.
The walls were made of large chunks of stone, but the moldings was an identical set of ancient runes being repeated over and over again. Draco took in the hallways as he walked looking and listening for anything out of the ordinary, anything that might attack him.
The hallway went on for a while and Draco was about to turn back when he heard a low murmuring. As he walked closer, the murmuring turned into clear words. Words he never expected to hear in uncharted territory of his home.
“Nargles, that’s what it is…”
What the bloody hell?
The lights were dimming but he could make out two breakaway corridors leading to the right and the left. The clear talking was coming from the left, but he could now hear multiple voices interacting lowly from the right. They were probably further down.
Honing in on the now babbling voice, he followed it until he saw bars on a cell door at the end of the corridor.
“Nox,” he whispered dousing his wand light. Casting a silent charm on his shoes, he walked along the walls. It turned out he didn’t need to.
Looney Lovegood was in a cell underneath his home talking to herself about Nargles and some other fantastically made up creature. She was facing the wall and murmuring quietly to herself.
Draco paused and slowly made to turn and walk away as quickly as possible. What did one say to their classmate that was also a prisoner in their basement?
“Draco, is that you?” she asked without turning around. “You don’t need to run away. I can’t hurt you. I’m locked behind bars you see.”
Draco froze mid-step, unsure of what to do.
After several moments of awkward silence, Looney began to hum to herself. Draco slowly put his foot down.
“I was only singing so you wouldn’t feel as awkward. Have you got any pudding?”
“I’m sorry, what?” Draco clapped his hands over his mouth.
“Pudding? I really enjoy pudding. I’m sorry to say, I haven’t had any in a while and I’m quite hungry.”
“Umm… Sure?” Draco summoned his leftover pudding from lunch and levitated it into her lap.
Why was he still here and more importantly, why had he just given her pudding?
“Wrackspurts,” she said dreamily after she finished eating.
“I’m sorry?”
“That’s how I knew you were here, there was an awful lot of Wrackspurts.”
“Oh.”
“You seem upset. Would you like to talk about it?” Draco looked at the mass of dirty blonde hair. She was sitting crossed legged on the floor, looking as comfortable as an owl in an owlery. She was supposed to be a prisoner in a cell and she was asking him why he was upset?
Draco was about to ask that very question when he stopped. Why was Looney Lovegood in a prison cell? What could she have possibly done to warrant being pulled off of the Hogwarts Express?
“Umm… Loo- Lovegood. Why were you umm…”
“Incarcerated? My father owns the Quibbler and You Know Who was quite upset with what he was writing in the paper. I’m not sure why though, he was just writing the truth.” Looney responded simply. She was quiet for several moments before she spoke again. “Sometimes when we learn a hard truth, it can be a burden for us. Once we learn to bear it, it can often become a great light in our life. Granted we don’t learn to bear it too late that is.”
Draco raised his wand in shock, “What do you know?” he demanded.
“Different things, sometimes I like to talk about the Dapperblimps and their mating patterns with Professor Snape. Sometimes, I don’t think he likes when I talk to him,” she mused.
Draco cast a Lumos. Lovegood was wearing a yellow dress that was stained so dark it looked brown. Only because Draco had seen her wearing the same exact outfit the night before did he know what color it was.
In the light, her hair was so matted it looked brown, while some parts looked almost black-
“Lovegood turn around,” he ordered. Draco expected her to ignore him or at least fight. What he didn’t expect was for her to swivel around. Draco’s initial reaction was to gasp and stumble back.
“It’s not all the bad,” she assured him. Not all that bad? Her left eye was swollen shut and her right eye was red and swiveling in odd directions. She had large gashes all over her face and arms. While her clothes and hair were soaked in blood.
“Looney, is that your blood?”
“Well, yes. I wouldn’t want to get it on other people’s robes. It’s quite hard to get the stain out.”
Draco’s stomach rumbled as his lunch made an appearance. When he was done retching his guts out, he waved a hand in front of her. “Looney, can you see me?”
“Funny thing, why does everyone call me Looney? My name is Luna. I mean I know that sometimes I may act unorthodox- Draco what are you doing?”
Draco wasn’t sure what possessed him but in the time Luna started talking about her name, Draco had unlocked her cell door and began going over every healing charm he knew. Her clothes would need to be burnt. Maybe he could transfigure his jumper into something for her?
His wand hovered over her face, healing her wounds and cleaning her hair and skin. Ignoring her when she repeated the question, he held his wand over her swollen eye. It took three different spells but he was able to get her eye to return to its odd pale silvery tone.
With one eye wide in shock, he cast diagnostic charms on her other eye. There was a shard of glass inside. Placing the rest of the eye in stasis, he withdrew the glass and then healed any damage it caused. He cast several more healing charms until both of her eyes were back to their normal coloring.
Concentrating on his room, he summoned several potions from his potions cabinet. After thinking it over, he nicked one from his father’s study drawer. He had so many he wouldn’t notice it was gone. Finally, he summoned the rest of his lunch tray to him.
The items zoomed into his hands and he handed them over to her. She was dutiful and asked no questions as she consumed everything she was given, with the exception of the little purple bottle from his father’s study. Draco had it securely in his pocket.
“Luna, can I-”
“I love the snow. It’s so beautiful. A winter wonderland,” she sighed.
Draco looked around. She had clearly been isolated from the other prisoners and left to die. No Death Eaters were coming back to check on her until morning.
Draco stood and offered her his hand to stand up. She took it and followed him silently back towards the stairs of Armand Malfoy. He helped her as they climbed the stairs and emerged in the center of the maze.
Luna was ecstatic. She also wasn’t wearing shoes.
She smiled in her new red jumper and turtleneck. They were frumpy and something he had transfigured based off an outfit he recalled Pansy laughing at once.
“It’s beautiful Draco,” she breathed. Releasing her grip from Draco she stepped into the snow. Draco cast several warming charms on them both as he followed her pink and blue trainers into the snow. It must have snowed again because his footprints were now invisible. “Thank you, Draco.”
“Luna, can I ask you something?” she nodded. “It’s about what you said before about burdens and bearing those burdens.”
Luna’s eyes lit up, “You mean the firecrabs?”
“What firecrabs? I wasn’t talking about firecrabs. I was talking about finding out about things in your life that weren’t- Oh, forget it. I have no idea why I’m even talking about this with you.”
“What are we talking about? About the mark on your arm, you keep hiding or the fact that Professor Snape is your rite-father?”
Draco tripped over his own feet. “What? How could you possibly-”
“To give over yourself for another to have a child is not a little thing. My mother told me about it when I was little. The tale of the fatherless father.”
Draco took a weary step closer to her, she was rolling the snow into a snowball. “How did the story end?”
Her eyebrows furrowed and she dropped the snowball, “I don’t remember if that was a happy ending. I think the boy had a choice, to accept his rite-father in secret or to allow him to hide behind the facade of his knight and protector.”
“What happens if the boy chooses to keep the rite… the man as his knight and protector?”
“Well, the father dies in the end so I’m not sure.”
“What?! What do you mean he dies?” Draco began to panic. Did something happen at Hogwarts? Was Snape attacked?
“No, he died as all things must. It’s the circle of life.” Draco was confused. What in the bloody hell was the circle of life? “In order for all things to live, they must also die. That is the circle of life. We nourish the living by burying ourselves in the ground and nurturing the soil. We come from dust and so we must return to it.”
Draco watched one of the oddest witches at Hogwarts, no the entire world, as she tossed the snowball playfully at an annoyed Armand Malfoy. She may be an ‘odd-ball’ as Pansy called her, but she was wise as well.
When she ran out of snowballs she turned and walked over to Draco. Leaning on her toes, she kissed his cheek. “Thank you, Draco. This trip has been lovely but I think it’s time for me to return to my cell. I don’t want to get caught and the werewolves are going to start the rounds soon.”
Draco raised an eyebrow, “How do you know when their rounds are?”
“I listened from my cell. There’s not much else to do.”
Draco held her hand as he guided her back inside the fountain. She stopped right before they descended the stairs. They both knew this might be the last time she would ever see the outside world again.
Draco wanted to scream or cry. He knew when he was alone in his room and the silencing charms were up, he would probably do both.
“It’s a winter wonderland,” she said dreamily before leaning up and kissing him on the cheek.
It startled him into smiling back at her. “Yeah, it definitely is.”
The walk back to her cell was short and when the bars were locked he stood there hovering nervously. He didn’t want to trick her, but she had to take it. The Dark Lord knew legilimency, though he doubted he’d be able to make heads or tails of her head.
“Draco, why don’t you give me the potion in your left pocket? I know it’s a memory potion.”
Draco handed her the vial. “What will you tell the guards about your injuries?”
“What are you talking about? A colubrum angelus healed me in my sleep, they’re known to do that you know.” She winked and then knocked the potion back.
It wasn’t until Draco was safely in his room that he translated the name of her newest fictitious animal. The angel of serpents.
Draco screamed into his pillow until his throat was raw.
Draco stood in front of a simple grey tombstone in a muggle cemetery in Cokeworth, England. Draco’s turned up the collar on his grey overcoat that covered most of his face, while his low hat covered the rest. His usually pale face was gaunt and his eyes drained of color and red-rimmed.
Potter won the war, but they lost so much. After he re-examined Snape’s memories, he found more memories. Potter… Harry then sought out Draco and removed both his mother and himself from Auror custody. His father could rot for all Draco cared.
They were each given a chance to look through the pensieve that Potter had saved after his… after the Dark Lord… When it was his turn he froze. He couldn’t do it. He couldn’t look in the basin, he was about to flee when he a small hand gripped his shoulder.
“I’ll go with you if you’d like.” Luna Lovegood was probably the most magical being in all of wizardkind. She stood with him while he watched every moment of his… his...
Draco shook as he sank down on his knees in the dirt that covered the bravest wizard in all of history. No one was going to remember that he protected students from Umbridge after the Ministry sent her to brainwash students, no one was going to remember when he stopped the Death Eaters from rampaging and killing everyone in Hogwarts after Draco let them in, and he was probably already inked in the new textbooks as the first headmaster that killed the previous headmaster to gain his position before installing the Carrows to torture students.
No one was going to know that he was...
Draco placed the solitary flowers gently on the upturned earth right beneath the name on the tombstone. It was a simple line. All it said was, ‘Here lies Severus Snape.’ There were no meaningful quotes, no inscriptions to talk about the life he led and the millions of lives he saved helping to take down one of the darkest wizards of all time. There weren’t even any other flowers.
He was already forgotten and he had only been buried today.
Just a name on a stone in the ground, that was all that was left of a person that Draco-
Draco apparated away from the cemetery and into the HogsHead Inn. He needed a drink. He needed to stop thinking. The wizarding world was still celebrating their victory of the death of the Dark Lord. Draco was still mourning the loss of his... of his...
Draco knocked back a glass of firewhiskey that Aberforth Dumbledore set before him. Without asking, Dumbledore poured him two more. Draco knocked back the first one and was about to knock back the second when a pair of multicolored trainers caught his vision.
“Hello Draco,” Looney Lovegood said as she sat down next to him. She looked at his face and her smile fell. “You never told him did you?”
Draco shook his head as he reigned his emotions in.
“Aberforth? Can you leave the bottle and book Mister Malfoy a room? I don’t think he’s going to be apparating anywhere tonight.” Looney leaned over and refilled Draco’s shot taking the second one for herself. She raised her shot. “To Professor Snape, the greatest potions teacher, and collector of Dapperblimps.”
They both drank and Luna refilled their drinks.
Draco asked against his better judgment, “Luna what is a Dapperblimps?”
“Oh, Dapperblimps are related to the colubrum angelus. It’s a sea serpent that tends to slither around the feet of outcasts that are both loyal and brave. There were always so many in Professor Snape’s potions classroom. I made him a necklace of them. I don’t think he liked it,” she added on thoughtfully.
Draco snorted into his new glass of firewhiskey, not surprised to feel tears rolling down his cheeks.
“Who are you toasting to?” she asked.
Draco gazed deep into the amber liquid and sighed acceptance rolling through his body like a wave, “To my real father who never knew how much his son loved him.”