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“We’re gonna get out of this shithole one day.” Alice is, at first, taken aback by Deb’s sudden outburst. All they’re doing is sitting, eating lunch together on some secluded (maybe it's on someone's private property, but deb wasn’t about to worry alice with shit like that) hill, when she decides to make such a weird proclamation. “We are. We’re gonna be so far gone no one will know where to look for us. Maybe New York. Maybe Boston.” Alice hasn’t been hanging out with Deb for that long by the time she decides to say something like this, and it’s weird for a moment, before it’s just not. “Well, I dunno. I like it here… It’s quiet.”
Alice fiddles with the hem of her sweater as she speaks, trying to ignore her real reasons for wanting to stay. The divorce is hard to get used to, and she wants to spend all the time with her dad she can. Sure, she’s bitter about everything, a tad headstrong when it comes to the way he handles it, but she wants to stay close to him. It was already hard enough to get him to notice her before all this shit went down.
“I mean, I guess.” Deb offers Alice a light shrug of her shoulders, taking a long, drawn out hit off her juul. “I think I’d go crazy staying here. I’d hate to leave you behind, though. Almost makes me not want to go all together.” Alice can’t help but blush, gaze shifting downwards. “You could probably find a whole buncha people like me in a big place like New York. I’m not that special.”
Deb thinks for a minute, staring at Alice, before simply replying with a, “Nah.” and taking another hit. “That’s not true.” Alice wants her to elaborate. She waits, and waits, and waits for her to defend her claim, but she never does. “Oh.” Blush deepening, she tries to think of something to say, anything to make her seem even slightly less whipped for her. “I don’t think so, but thanks. I think.” Deb just smiles and nods, and fuck, it’s the prettiest thing Alice has seen in years. It’s so carefree, so gentle and light- perfection, as far as she’s concerned. “You don’t smoke, right?”
Definitely not. How can she say that and still sound cool, though? Should she lie? Would Deb want her to smoke some of her weird vape shit if she did? “That’s right.” The words fly from her mouth before she has time to think about them, which is honestly more of a relief than anything. “Why do you hang around with the smoke club, anyways? I always wondered that.” Alice doesn’t really have an answer. Throughout freshman year, she hung out with Grace Chastity a lot. They were pretty close for the longest time, until she met that other fuckface who gave her the stupid idea of forming the club. “I used to be friends with Grace. I don’t have a whole lot of friends besides her… So I just kinda stayed.”
“Grace? That fuckin’ prude- you’re in it for her?” Deb looks hurt for a moment. Alice can’t quite place why. “I guess? I don’t care for her much nowadays, through. We used to be tight… She stopped hanging out with me after a while. I keep thinking she’ll talk to me again if I’m in her dumb club.”
“Gross.” Deb scoffs. “Grace wouldn’t know what a good friend looks like if it slapped her across that stuck up face of hers.” Alice’s lips curl into a smile. “I’m grateful for the smoke club, as silly as it sounds. I don’t think we would have been friends if we didn’t meet through it.”
Deb turns again to look at her, chuckling at just how red her face is. It’s adorable- everything about Alice is adorable, though. Her smile, her laugh, the way she crinkles her nose when she’s doing any hard thinking; Deb loves every part of it. “Yeah, that’s definitely a plus.” She scoots closer to her. “All jokes aside though, it sucks that Grace ditched you like that. You deserve better.”
Alice is sure Deb can hear her heart beating out of her chest. “You think so?” Everything about Deb confuses her in the best of ways. Every sentence out of her mouth has an air of mystery to it; she clings to every word. “Duh.”
There’s silence for a few moments. “What did you mean earlier?” Alice eventually decides to break through the quiet. “About New York, and finding someone like me.” Deb lets out another little laugh. “I thought it was pretty obvious. There’s no way I could find someone like you. I don’t know what it is about you, but there’s something different about you than anyone else I’ve met.”
Alice is about to prod further, to find the answer she’s hoping for, only to feel a buzz from her pocket. Fishing out her phone, she discovers it to be none other than her father. “Sorry, I should take this.” Deb nods, turning to her own phone and pretending not to listen.
“Hi, dad. I’m just with Deb… Yes, that Deb.” Her face scrunches up, “Dad! Don’t say stuff like that. I know, I know. It’s only for a little while, and- No, no, she’s not here with us.” Deb raises a brow. “What do you want?” Alice isn’t sure why she sounds so abrasive, but there’s not much she can do about it now. “Oh shit- shoot, was that today? God, it completely slipped my mind. Alright, alright- I’ll be there in half an hour. Love you too.”
Once she’s sure the conversation has ended, Deb looks up, smile quickly fading as she notices the expression on Alice’s face. “Sorry, I’m gonna have to go earlier than I thought. My dad got these tickets to Godspell, and we don’t really get to spend that much time together lately, and I just-”
“Don’t worry about it. Maybe you could make it up to me by letting me take you to a movie tomorrow night?” Alice nearly doesn’t hear her in her hurry, freezing in place for a moment when the words finally make it to her brain. “Like… Like, as a fun friend thing, or a real, gay date?”
This time, Deb’s laugh isn’t small or graceful. It’s practically a bellow, one that nearly sends her rolling down the hill. “Whichever you want it to be. I was going for ‘real gay date’, but if you’d rather it just be a gal pal’s thing-”
“No! No, I’m down for the gay date. I love me some gay dating! Especially with you.” Deb’s smile has returned, getting to her feet and offering her hand to help Alice up. “Perfect. I’ll pick you up at eight, if that works?”
Alice nods. “Yeah. Yeah- Sounds amazing.” She can’t believe this is really happening, even more so when Deb pulls her close and gives her a little peck on the lips. It’s not intense, not passionate or heated or whatever; it’s filled with the kind of gentle warmth Alice had never felt before. “See you then, sunshine.” And with that, Deb is walking her to her car, making sure she’s all safe and buckled before closing the door and watching her drive off. Alice is surprised she makes it to the theater without getting in an accident.
“You look awfully happy.” Her dad smiles at her, patting her shoulder. “Excited for the show?”
“Yeah.” Alice doesn’t really hear him. “Definitely.”