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♡
Lance and Keith’s rivalry starts a little something like this.
♡
2 and a half years ago
Let it be clear that Keith doesn’t get nervous often. He figures nervousness comes from doing something out of your comfort zone and growing up in the system the way Keith did, your comfort zone may expand a lot further than most people’s.
So Keith doesn’t get nervous often.
Then he starts college. That’s fine – he’s not nervous about that. A few days into the semester, he meets Lance.
Keith is thrust far, far out his comfort zone.
He didn’t mean to bump into Lance on the first day of lab – didn’t mean to collide with him so hard the other boy spilled the contents of his beaker all over the floor. He didn’t mean to, honestly. He had no reason to. In fact, he was kind of into the whole tall, dark, and handsome vibe Lance had going on.
But he did. And Lance, for some reason, ended up hating him for it. Things didn’t get easier when their Biology professor assigned them as lab partners for the semester.
The thing about Lance, Keith figures, is that he might be a bit like Keith, and isn’t often in situations where he’s not in total control.
Not that Keith is trying to be controlling – that’s not his thing.
♡
“Listen Keith - ”
“Why’d you say it like that?”
“– I don’t know what your deal is –"
“I promise you, I don’t have a deal.”
“– but I’m not gonna let you make me look bad, –"
“I never – “
“– and sabotage my grade –”
“We’re partners, we get the same grade.”
"– just because you have some sort of superiority complex –”
“What? ”
“–so you can stick to your side of the bench, and I’ll stick to mine. Sound good?”
And Keith’s reeling so hard from ‘superiority complex’ because really – he does not have one, that all he gets out is “Uh?” before Lance stalks off.
Guess there’s no love lost between him and Lance.
♡
Lance and Keith’s friendship starts a little something like this.
♡
2 and a half years ago, minus several weeks
Lance was quiet. He walked into the lab, sat down at their bench, and got started on their work without a single teasing insult hurtled Keith’s way. He looked worn down, blue eyes not nearly as bright as they usually are. Keith enjoyed the silence. He did. It had only been twenty minutes and they had already managed to get more work done than they usually do, without their squabbling. And obviously Keith’s concern was for his grade, and not for the boy who seemed to like everyone but him, and this whole working quietly thing was actually really efficient, and it’s not like Lance’s almost eerie (seriously, he hadn’t said a single word) silence was bothering him.
But then again –
– him and Lance always worked well together, hadn’t gotten anything below an A- on their assignments so far, and maybe Keith didn’t like the idea of something bothering Lance – who couldn’t keep his mouth shut for more than two minutes – to the point where he didn’t even bat an eye when Keith knocked a vial over. So he enjoyed the silence, but –
“Are you okay?” came out anyway.
He gets a scoff in response and couldn’t say he didn’t see it coming. “What do you care?” Lance says, and it lacks the bite Keith was expecting.
“I don’t.” He says it immediately on reflex, but as the words leave his mouth he knows they’re not true. The truth is probably more along the lines that Lance’s constant chatter and bickering has become, dare he say it, comforting, and his silence makes Keith feel uneasy, off. The realization hits him all at once, and he decidedly does not dwell on it.
Lance doesn’t respond and Keith frowns. Opens his mouth to try and backtrack. Closes it. Opens it again and, in true Keith fashion, starts speaking without really thinking.
“Look, I get you probably hate me, but I –” and he closes his mouth again, because Lance is giving him a look he can’t quite decipher and he loses his train of thought. He looks away and tries again. “I’m just saying it’s not like we’re friends or anything, so. If you want to – I don’t know, vent? Or whatever. It’s not like I’d care.” he flinches because that doesn’t sound encouraging. “That’s not what I meant, like I – ? I mean I don’t know you so it’s – it wouldn’t matter to me. If that makes sense. Like you could just say it to get it off your chest, like, um,” he chances a look back at Lance who looks confused but those blue eyes of his are sparkling with amusement, which for some reason throws Keith off enough for him to finish his sentence with “like a confessional.” and he sits there, nearly outwardly gaping at himself for the sheer stupidity of that statement when Lance laughs, and it’s a sound that’s never been directed at Keith and it kind of gives him whiplash because what is happening why is he suddenly a nervous, stammering mess in front of Lance of all people?
Lance’s laughter fizzles out, and he scratches the back of his neck, completely ignorant to the turmoil he’s causing in Keith’s mind. “It’s not that a big deal, I guess. I borderline failed a midterm I studied my ass off for, and it’s frustrating because it’s a required course for my program but it doesn’t even really matter for what I wanna do with my life, but that’s a bigger problem than getting a bad grade on my midterm, but then I think about it and if I can’t do good in this class then maybe those problems are on the same level and I –” he breathes out heavily and Keith feels for him. “I don’t know,” Lance continues, “I just keep going around in circles in my head and it’s stressing me out.”
Keith realizes 1.) he’s staring, 2.) that’s the most Lance has ever said to him, and 3.) this is the first normal conversation they’ve ever had. He realizes a fourth thing – he likes having a normal conversation with Lance.
Looking back to the work they’re still supposed to be doing, Keith pours something into a beaker while asking, “What class?”
Lance also gets back to work, and tells him the class is Calculus 1 (which perks his interest, since he’s in that class too), and that math has never been his strong suit, and that it worries him because he has to take more required math classes for his degree. Keith asks what his program is, that requires math when Lance said he didn’t need it for what he wants to do. Lance answers that he’s a Neuroscience major and Keith stops, amazed.
“You’re in neuroscience?” when Lance nods Keith goes on to ask, “Don’t they only let fifty people into that program each year?”
And Keith’s not blind, okay? The blush that blooms under Lance’s skin, and the accompanying shy smile is maybe one of the most beautiful things he’s ever seen. Maybe.
“Yeah,” Lance answers, before his smile drops. “That’s also what’s got me stressed. I kinda feel I don’t deserve it. There’s probably people out there who would be doing way better than I am who didn’t get in.”
And Keith, eloquent as ever says, “Probably.” At Lance’s raised eyebrows he continues, “But they’re not the ones who got in, right? You did.”
Keith can see Lance struggles with that logic but he must accept it, figuring that Keith has nothing to gain from talking Lance up.
(he does though, he gets to see that pretty flush again)
“Why don’t you just ask for help? Like get a tutor? Or ask your friends or something.” he presses when Lance doesn’t say anything.
He gets a groan in response. “It’s embarrassing. My friends are geniuses and I don’t want them to know how much I struggle with something they can do as easy as breathing. I know it’s stupid because they’d help if I asked, but … I don’t know. I can’t really bring myself to do it. And a tutor, I considered it but I’m not good with tutors. They frustrate me. They’re never able to help me and I don’t wanna waste money thinking this time it’ll be different just to get fucked by my exams again.”
And as a majority of this conversation has gone, Keith once again speaks without thinking and says “I’ll help you.”
“No, no it’s fine, you don’t –” Lance rushes to get out but Keith interrupts him.
“Seriously, I could. I’m taking the same class, so it really wouldn’t be a problem. I’d be happy to help.”
“For real?” and Lance looks incredulous but hopeful and that’s all Keith needs to answer with a firm “Yeah.”
Lance gives him a considering look and says “I don’t mean for this to come out as like, bitchy, since you’re offering to help but are you, you know – like, good? Like I need some serious help, man. You’re gonna need to know your shit to be able to make any sense to me.”
Keith smiles at him, tells him he’s studying engineering and that he has to be good at math to get a degree and that he promises to do his best to make sense to Lance.
Lance smiles back at him, they work until class is over, and then exchange phone numbers in the hallway.
The following weekend they meet at a diner near Keith’s apartment, where Lance pays for his food because It’s the least I can do and after that, they become inseparable.
♡
Lance and Keith’s complications start a little something like this.
♡
Finals season is a bitch. The tests are the worst, the assignments are the worst, the lack of sleep is the worst, your face when you look into the mirror after three all-nighters is definitely the worst. Which is why Keith, finally sleeping in after finishing his exams, is less than thrilled about waking up to the incessant ringing of his phone at ten o’clock in the morning.
“Lance.” he says by way of greeting, because the customized ringtone of ‘you’re my honeybunch, sugarplum,’ only belonged to one person.
“Keith! Hi! Are you busy?” In Keith’s opinion, he sounds far too cheerful for the hour, and it simultaneously grates on his nerves and does something else, something lighter, that his sleep addled brain isn’t equipped to deal with.
“I was busy sleeping, yeah.” He grumbles out.
“Oh, sorry,” Lance says, sounding anything but. “Listen, let’s get breakfast. The day is nice, we’re both finally done with exams, and I may have gotten myself into something only you can help me with.”
Keith pauses in where he’s trying to detangle his legs from the blanket, “Wh – something – ?” he starts to ask, but figures that if Lance is asking to see him in person, the conversation may not be phone appropriate. “Yeah, okay.”
“Awesome, meet me at that diner you like in half an hour. See you!” and hangs up before Keith has the chance to even take another breath. His mind is left reeling, but that’s a side effect of most conversations he has with Lance.
Regardless, he drags himself out of bed and into the shower, because somewhere along the line, Keith - stubborn, strong willed, immovable-once-he-made-up-his-mind Keith – had become a terrible, terrible pushover for Lance.
♡
Keith finds Lance sitting in a booth by the window. He’s looking out, gaze distracted, head resting in one hand, fingers of the other drumming against the table.
Keith thinks it’s just a little bit unfair – that a boy made for summer like Lance, all ocean eyes, sandy hair, and sun-kissed skin, still manages to glow so brightly in the cold winter sun.
“Hi,” he says settling in across from Lance. He looks down at the table where a plate of waffles, scrambled eggs, and potatoes, all doused in maple syrup sits in front of him. A combination Lance has told him countless times is disgusting, but is nevertheless Keith’s favourite. Meaning Lance bought this for him on purpose, meaning he’s trying to bribe Keith, meaning –
“You’ve really done it this time, haven’t you?” he says looking back up.
Lance groans, sliding back in his seat and covering his face with his hands - his own breakfast sitting in front of him untouched.
“Yeah.” He says from behind his hands. “I mean, not really, but. Yeah.” he rubs his face and settles with his arms crossed on the table before looking back up at Keith, eating his breakfast, unphased for the most part, having now gotten used to Lance’s antics.
“And you need my help?” Keith asks.
“Big time.” Lance nods.
“Okay,” Keith drawls. He’s struggling to pull it out of Lance, but he stays quiet, waiting for Lance to work up to saying whatever it is himself.
“You don’t have plans for break, do you?” Lance asks, after some silence.
“Not really.” Keith shrugs. “I was gonna go and visit Shiro but Adam surprised him with tickets to the Maldives to go be gross and in love or whatever, so it’s just me and Kosmo. Why?”
The look of relief on Lance’s face makes his eyebrows tilt in a way that’s distracting enough for Keith to miss the question Lance throws at him.
“Sorry, what?”
“I said,” Lance says slowly, “do you want to come with me?”
“Wh – to California?”
“Cuba, actually. My grandparents’ beach house, precisely.”
Keith’s not following. “What? Why are you asking me to go on vacation with you, I thought you needed my help?”
“I do.”
“Spit it out, then, Lance.”
Lance sighs, and settles back in his seat before promptly turning Keith’s world upside down.
“My family thinks we’re dating.”
And their back and forth immediately dies down. Did he hear that right?
“Your family thinks – ” he begins slowly, “who’s dating?”
“We.” Lance gestures between the two of them. “Us. You and me, Keith. My family thinks that we’re together.”
“Oh.” Keith says. So he did hear right. But also, “What the fuck?”
“Yeah, that was my reaction too. Except they were all, ‘Oh come on, Lance you don’t have to hide it from us anymore!’ and next thing I knew I have two tickets to Cuba, one of them with your name.”
“What the fuck?”
“Yeah.”
And as the shock wears off and the situation settles in, Keith can feel a blush rising under his skin. He looks back down at his plate and pretends to be interested in the way the potatoes are soaking up the syrup. “Um,” he starts, then stops, because he doesn’t know where to start. “Like, your whole family?” he asks.
“Mom, dad, my brothers, my sisters, my grandparents, my niece and nephew. The cat, probably.”
“Why?” the question pops out without him meaning to say it, but he really wants to know. What could have possibly led to Lance’s entire family thinking that he and Keith were dating?
“I have no idea. I tried to think about it but…” he trails off, his own flush beginning to stain his cheeks. “Honestly, it might just be because I talk about you so much. I guess to the point where they figured we were… well, you know.”
Keith can’t quite wrap his head around this because – “but don’t you talk lots about Hunk and Pidge, too? Allura?”
Lance’s face is pink all over now and he mumbles something so quietly Keith can’t hear him.
“What?”
“I don’t know, Keith. I guess I just talk about you different.”
They both look pathetically red now. “Talk about me in a way that makes your family –”
“ Yes.” Lance cuts him off. “Yes, and I’m sorry, and I know I could’ve told them they were wrong but – but I. I don’t know. I freaked. And I didn’t – I don’t know. There are worse people they could’ve thought I was with, and they all looked unfairly happy at the prospect of us being together, I don’t know. And we’re all going down to Varadero for break and they thought it would be perfect for you to come meet the family then, and. Yeah. They all seemed so excited. So I didn’t say anything.” Lance winces. “Sorry.”
They sit in silence while Keith tries to shut the suspiciously teenaged sounding voice in his head up telling him this is it you fool this is your chance to be with the guy you have a stupidly pathetically massive crush on and escape with no consequences and maybe he’ll realize he’s actually into you it happens in all the movies because, well. Because. Because that’s just a bad idea and the movies don’t know what they’re talking about and Keith has done his very best to control his raging crush on Lance for the last two and a half years but clearly he hasn’t done a very good job because Lance is sitting across from him, looking miserable, and he’s quiet, and Keith hates when Lance is quiet and he can’t let that be so
“Okay.”
Lance’s head whips up. “Okay? Like, ‘okay, I understand why you didn’t say anything’ or ‘okay, you’re an idiot but you’re my best friend and I’m the nicest person in the world so I’ll help you out but you’re gonna owe me for the rest of our lives’ ?”
And Keith laughs, because this is Lance. This is his best friend, and he knows there’s very little, if anything at all, he wouldn’t do to make Lance happy.
“I’ll come,” Keith says, and he’s smiling because he wants Lance to know he’s okay with this.
“You’re for real?” Lance asks, and he’s standing now. “Like legit? You’re in? You’re really gonna come to Cuba and pretend to be my boyfriend for two whole weeks? In front of my family? In front of my friends? You’re gonna do that for me?”
Keith shrugs, because yes, of course he’d do it for Lance, but he’d be a liar if he said he wasn’t doing it for himself too. What he says out loud though is, “A free beach vacation? Of course I’m in.”
And Lance drags him out of his seat and squeezes the life out of him, the smell of Lance’s favourite almond lotion filling his nose. “You’re the best. You’re the best you’re the best you’re the best, man I owe you big time.” he lets go and plops back down in his seat, and with vigour begins explaining what details are vital to know.
“So we’ve been dating for a year come this January. We’d been increasingly flirting with each other – and that actually makes me glad this is the first time you’re meeting my family face to face because if they ever caught you trying to flirt in real life they’d never believe me, and –”
“Watch it.” he says, but he’s smiling because Lance is blushing again but he looks so excited that Keith thinks maybe –
“ – sorry, man, but you know it’s true. Anyways, yeah, yada yada, after months of pining and shit I finally took a shot and asked you out, but because just the two of us would do things alone so often you didn’t even know it was a date –”
“You’ve really thought about this.”
“You know my family. They love the theatrics. Anyways, stop interrupting me. So you didn’t know it was a date until I stopped at one point and said, ‘Keith, you do know I asked you out as a date, right’ and you were so lovestruck and enamoured that –”
“For real?”
“I said stop interrupting. You were so shocked you didn’t know how to respond, so you just kissed me instead. Also, the date was at that Brazilian steakhouse you like, and the kiss was on the walk back to your place. Also also, we fight sometimes, because all couples do, but we always make up because we’re too miserable without being with each other for like, a day, so we talk it out and then order takeout and watch the shittiest Netflix movie we can find. We spend nights at each other’s places sometimes, and I never let you make breakfast the next morning, even though you know how to cook, just because I like to tease you and pretend you don’t. You keep foods you don’t eat but that I do in your kitchen for me, and I do the same. You hog all the blankets and I whine about it but really I kinda love it because it gives me an excuse to –” Lance stops abruptly, blushing darker. “Um, yeah. Anyways, you get the gist. Just things to keep in mind to, I don’t know… um, give you a sense of, um. This. In case someone asks, or something.” he finishes with a mumble.
Keith has no coherent answer for that. “What am I supposed to say if they ask me about you?” he asks instead.
“Come on, Keith, you know the answer to that.”
And he does. He knows Lance can’t fall asleep unless he’s listening to music and that he has to start his day with a bowl of Fruity Pebbles because It’s like happiness in a bowl, Keith, I swear. Knows Lance is an early riser and has no qualms about rousing a grouchy Keith out of bed without fearing the consequences anyone else would because he knows Keith has a soft spot for him, knows Lance acts like he wants to be left alone when what he wants the most is someone banging down his door with an extra large Hawaiian pizza and the Zoolander movies and a reminder that You’re never alone, you know that, right? You know I’m here for you if you ever need me? Knows Lance keeps sticky notes all over his apartment to remind him of things because his mind runs a thousand miles a minute, knows how he takes his coffee, his tea, knows his favourite pair of socks and his favourite day of the week, and how hard he works himself to get into a good med school and become successful so he can get rich and give the people he loves the world and then some.
And this Keith, the one sitting in front of food long gone cold, for all his teasing, is as shocked as the one in Lance’s fake universe, because some of what Lance said is real, sounds like what they actually do and how they actually are. And this Keith wants to kiss him too, wants to kiss Lance because he doesn’t know what to say because he’s afraid if he says something right now it’ll come out overly earnest so he smiles instead, and just nods, and pokes around his potatoes.
“Plus,” Lance says after a while of silence, “we’ve been talking about taking a trip together anyways. I know it’s not New York like I wanted, or West Virginia for us to go cryptid hunting like you wanted –”
“That was a joke!” Keith interjects.
Lance smiles, “– but it’s something?”
Keith smiles back, and from the bottom of his heart he says “I think it’ll be perfect.”
♡
This was a bad idea. Thinking you can manage being the pretend boyfriend for the guy whose real boyfriend you wanna be is a bad way to spend winter break and Keith wants to slap his past self for agreeing because they’ve landed, and they’re at the airport, and they’ve gotten their bags and that’s Lance’s twin sister Rachel and his brother Marco running right at them and oh man why did Keith think he could do this.
Lance, simultaneously the devil for getting him into this situation and an angel for sensing Keith’s sudden anxiety, reaches out for his hand and squeezes it, waving to his siblings with his other arm. He has to let go when Rachel and Marco get to them so he can hug them, but it was enough to soothe Keith’s nerves.
Only for them to shoot back up when they turn their attention to him.
“So, you’re the Keith that Lance hasn’t shut up about since he started college, huh?” Rachel asks him and Keith wishes he didn’t take so long to respond but she is Lance’s twin sister after all, and he’s not gonna lie and say he wasn’t rendered literally speechless by how beautiful she is.
As he’s hugging her, his brain latches on to something she said. “Since we started college, huh?” and tosses a smile at Lance who is resolutely not looking in his direction.
“Yeah, well it wasn’t always good things, so don’t feel too flattered.” he mutters under his breath.
Keith laughs, and sticks his hand out to greet Lance’s brother, who just uses it to pull him in for a hug instead. Keith should’ve figured they were a handsy family – Lance survives off of physical contact.
The drive to Lance’s grandparents’ house melts the rest of Keith’s jitters away. Rachel and Marco are so friendly and easy to talk to that Keith can’t imagine the rest of the family being any different. Also, and it’s a less pleasant realization, Keith remembers he’s not actually Lance’s boyfriend, and stress of getting everyone to like him is dimmed by the disappointment that this isn’t real.
Regardless, he’s intent on enjoying this trip, and so he pushes that thought to the back of his mind.
Pulling up to the house, Keith can see why Lance talks so fondly about his trips to Cuba. Surrounded by palm trees, it sits on the beach, like on the beach, which lines up with the stories Lance would tell him sometimes, about keeping his windows open and being able to hear the ocean, or sneaking down to the beach when he should’ve been in bed.
“I’m really glad you convinced me to wear shorts.” Keith says, as they’re pulling their bags out of the car and towards the house. “It’s hot as fuck.”
“I told you!” Lance laughs. “It’s also like, noon, though. It always gets mad hot during the middle of the day. We either spend it inside or in the water. They’re kinda the only bearable places to be when it’s nine hundred degrees outside.” He wipes some sweat from his brow and looks around. “We can go down after we settle in and meet everyone, if you want?”
Keith knows Lance is offering it as a way for him to escape from having to interact with people if he doesn’t have to, and he wants to kiss him for it. “Sounds good.”
And he doesn’t have the opportunity to say anything else because Lance’s parents are coming out of the house. Their reunion isn’t long, having just seen each other one month prior for Thanksgiving, which is unfortunate for Keith because it gives him less time to collect himself before they turn to him. Despite telling himself impressing Lance’s family didn’t matter since they weren’t really together, Keith feels the sudden urge to desperately win them over because boyfriend or not, Lance is one of the most important people in Keith’s life, and he wants his family to like him.
“Keith,” Lance’s mother says. She’s short, with the same curly brown hair Keith loves on Lance so much, deep brown eyes twinkling, and she’s glowing. Keith can understand why Lance would lie to keep her happy. He would too. “I’m so glad to finally meet you. We’ve heard a lot about you.” she says, hugging him.
Keith snorts out a laugh, returning the hug. “So I’ve heard. Lance assures me it wasn’t all good, though.”
She lets out a chuckle of her own and says, “Of course not. But that’s how we knew he liked you.” and winks and Keith’s head spins a little.
He greets Lance’s father as well, who Keith can only describe as a gentle giant, softer spoken than the rest of the family, but seemingly no less loving. Inside, Keith meets Lance’s grandparents, who he can only vaguely speak to with the little Spanish he remembers learning from his father, and relies on Lance to do the rest of the translating. They’re told Lance’s other siblings are flying in later in the evening, and that there’s going to be a family dinner that night but until then, they’re free to do as they please.
“Sounds good,” Lance says wrapping an arm around his mother’s shoulders. “I think Keith and I are gonna head down to the beach. You wanna go now?” Lance turns to address him, and for some reason, Keith blushes. “That sounds nice.”
“You boys have fun then,” Lance’s mother says, pinching Lance’s cheek, and Keith feels a smile burst on his face because that might’ve been the cutest thing he’s ever seen. “Don’t forget to wear sunscreen,” she tuts after them as they climb the stairs, “and Alejandro, I don’t want you leaving this house until your suitcase is unpacked and all your clothes are put away, understand?”
“ Yes, mama.”
“And you too, Keith. There’s plenty of room in the dresser for you both.” she calls as she walks off further into the house and her words hit him as they reach the top of the stairs. Enough room for them both? Does that mean…?
Lance must come to the same realization. There’s going to be a lot more people in this house than there are rooms, and if everyone was operating under the assumption that Lance and Keith were together and had been for a year, they must’ve figured there was no problem in them sharing a room and, upon entering said room and glancing around, a bed as well.
“Oh man.” Lance sighs. “Sorry, I didn’t even think about sleeping – I’ll dig around for an air mattress later.”
And Keith, without thinking, because honestly when does he ever think, says “No.” and mentally jackhammers himself for never learning to speak eloquently. “I mean it’s fine with me if we share? And it would be kinda suspicious, wouldn’t it? If you – if we didn’t sleep in the same bed?”
Lance looks around and shrugs, and Keith can see the back of his neck is pink. “That’s cool with me.”
“Okay.”
“Okay.”
“Okay,” Keith says again, and he laughs, because this is kind of awkward, sure, but he keeps reminding himself that this is Lance, and they’ll get over it in about seven seconds. He walks to the window, and lets out an appreciative whistle. “This is so nice.” he says.
“Isn’t it?” Lance comes up beside him. “This is the room I always stay in when we come visit. It’s got the best view, and –” Lance pulls the window open and sticks his head out, pointing to a tree branch situated right below it, “– it’s super easy to sneak out and back in using this tree.” he says with a wolfish grin on his face.
“Sneak out often?” Keith chuckles.
“All the time, man.” and he has a wistful look on his face that Keith wants to know the cause of before he shakes his head and says “Come on, let’s unpack. I wanna go to the beach.”
♡
“Maybe you should’ve worn sunscreen.” Lance laughs out when he glances over at Keith, whose got a towel draped over his head.
“Yeah, maybe.” Keith says from under the one layer of protection keeping him from sizzling. “But I don’t wanna go back and get it. Let’s just get in the water.”
“Hang on a second.” Lance says, and starts setting up a little spot for them on the beach. Keith resigns himself to waiting and plops down on the sand and lets himself watch Lance as he works about setting up the sun chairs they dragged out with them, fiddling with the towels he throws over them, and connecting his phone to the speaker, something beginning to play in the background.
“Are you planning on moving in?” Keith asks, raising an eyebrow at Lance’s setup.
Lance sends him a look. “Have you never been to the beach, Keith?”
“Once. We went to Florida when Shiro was looking at colleges. We spent a day in Miami.” he spent most of that day inside and was only on the sand for approximately fifteen minutes before he turned back around to go back to the hotel room and watch TV, but Lance doesn’t need to know that.
“How old were you?”
“Ten.” Keith responds, and by Lance’s laugh Keith thinks he figured out well enough what he spent his time doing.
“Right.” he says, digging around in the cooler and tosses Keith a can of beer, pulls one out for himself, and comes to sit by him.
“You know we brought the chairs out for a reason.” He says, cracking his can open.
“Yeah, I already sat down though. I’ll use them later.” And cracks open his own can, which promptly explodes into his face, much to Lance’s amusement.
“You did that on purpose,” he mutters, dragging the towel off his head to wipe some of the liquid off.
“Just a little,” Lance says, smiling slyly and glancing out over the ocean.
They sit there in silence for a while, and Keith feels – something, pull at his heart because this feels so normal, so them, and it is but it isn’t. It has him wondering, if they were really together, would they still be sitting like this? Doing nothing but enjoying each other’s company? Would they be sitting closer? He glances down at the space between his and Lance’s hands. Just an inch or two apart. Would that space be closed? Would Keith lean over and kiss Lance’s cheek and maybe push him down into the sand and –
“Lance?”
Lance makes a noise in recognition.
“Are there rules to this whole... situation?”
“Rules?” Lance asks looking back at him.
Keith looks back to the water, feels a flush rising to his face, a product of his thoughts from just a moment ago, but also, “I was thinking about when you held my hand at the airport.” And if that wasn’t hard to get out… “Is that something we should be doing? Like, around your family? Holding hands and stuff?”
Lance’s voice sounds suspiciously amused when he prompts “And stuff?”
Keith’s face gets hotter and he hopes he can chalk it up to the sun. “I mean we’re gonna be here for two weeks. Would it be weird if we didn’t, you know…”
“Kiss?”
And okay. Yes, but that was blunt. Keith brings his beer to his mouth to avoid answering immediately, worried if he opens his mouth he might speak without thinking and go yes yes exactly can we kiss can you please kiss me because I might be a little bit madly in lo –
“I mean. Yeah?”
“Yeah.” is Lance’s only response and can Keith please catch a break.
“Yeah, what?”
Lance shrugs, and why does he look so composed? Can’t he see Keith’s blood is trying to break through the surface of his skin?
“I thought about it. I was gonna ask you later, but yeah I think we should. At some points. Like Christmas? And New Years. And maybe –” and he stops because his voice wobbles and there’s the crack in composure Keith was so desperately looking for. He clears his throat and takes a sip before continuing. “Maybe some other times, too? Random days, so it doesn’t look suspicious that it’s only on holidays…” his voice trails off towards the end.
“Right, okay.” Keith says.
“I mean I’d always ask you before, to make sure you’re cool with it.” Lance ensures, and it’s a very respectful sentiment and all he can get out in response is –
“Okay.” he wishes he could say more, but he seems to be incapable of anything past one syllable currently.
“And the hand holding, I guess we could do that more often? If that’s fine with you?” Lance, for the first time since this whole thing started, sounds nervous, and that’s what prompts Keith to stop having an internal meltdown over his crush on Lance and get his shit together. They both made the decision to do this, after all.
“Yeah, that sounds fine.” and he offers his own contribution, even though it’s like walking through quicksand to get it out. “I can – you. We can kiss each other’s cheeks and shit, yeah? That’ll be easy enough.”
And for once Keith’s lack of eloquence works in his favour because Lance barks out a sudden laugh. “ Man, you are a romantic. Yeah, kisses on cheeks and shit. That works.”
“Alright, cool,” Keith says, and gulps down the rest of his beer before standing up. “Can we please get in the water now? I think my sweat is starting to evaporate.”
♡
When Lance and Keith got back home, Lance’s other siblings had already arrived.
“Ma told us you guys were on the beach.” Veronica says after they’d all greeted each other.
“Yeah we figured we’d give you some alone time.” Luis interjects with a snicker and Keith is suddenly grateful for the sunburn that’s made its home on his body because no one needs to see how flushed that would’ve made him.
He’s currently sitting on Lance’s bed, their bed, he corrects himself, after dinner, and after taking a cold shower, suffering silently.
“I told you you should’ve worn sunscreen.” Lance says from where he’s perched on his knees behind him, rubbing aloe onto Keith’s back.
“I’m not gonna tell you you were right.”
“You’re just gonna think it instead?”
“Yeah.” Keith breathes out, closing his eyes. The aloe feels good, and he’s only a little (read: a lot) disappointed he can’t enjoy the feeling of Lance’s fingers on his bare skin without it stinging.
“You’re lucky it’s raining the next few days. It’ll give time for your sunburn to chill out before we’re able to go out on the beach again.” Lance says, pulling away, done with his ministrations.
“Maybe then I’ll actually use sunscreen.” Keith winces as he stands up.
“I won’t let you leave the house without any.” Lance says with a gentle smile.
Yeah. Keith’s grateful for the sunburn.
♡
Keith wakes earlier than Lance the next morning, which is a rare occurrence. He fell asleep promptly last night after Lance had helped him with the aloe – the combination of a full belly and spending all day prior in the sun helping knock him out deeply. Lance had sat with him for a while, talking to him about the tiny knick knacks he had placed around the room as a child to try and claim it as his own. When Keith began struggling to keep his eyes open, Lance had chuckled and told him to get some rest, before leaving to go down and spend some time with his family.
It’s his bladder that rouses him from sleep, and not the sunburn, as he expected, which unfortunately, (or maybe fortunately, since it keeps him from being too creepy) cuts short the amount of time he can stare at Lance’s sleeping face, smushed endearingly against the pillow.
True to Lance’s word, the steady sound of rainfall can be heard against the window, and when he peeks through the blinds, he’s greeted by the sight of the sky and the sea blending into one dark gray, angry mess.
He sneaks downstairs, expecting to be the first one awake since it’s nine in the morning over the holidays, but Lance’s mother sits in the kitchen with a cup of tea.
“Keith, good morning.” she says with a sweet smile. “How’s your sunburn feeling?”
“Not as bad as I thought it was gonna be, actually.” he responds, surprising himself with how easily he’s able to twist his torso without feeling much sting. “That aloe is kind of magic.”
“My kids like to ignore me when I tell them to wear sunscreen too, so I made sure to find the best aloe I could. I’ll give you some chamomile lotion for you to put on as well – it’ll help.” she says, getting up and rummaging around their medicine cabinet before coming back with a bottle.
“Thank you,” he says, and he’s touched, because she really is treating him like he’s already family. So he tacks on, “And thank you for inviting me to be here, Mrs. McClain. I usually spend the break with my brother, but he’s gone on vacation with his fiancé this year. I would’ve spent the break alone, otherwise. I really appreciate it.”
“Nonsense, it’s our pleasure to have you here. Anyone who makes my Lance as happy as you do is welcome with us at any time. And please, call me Maria.”
Keith smiles. “Okay.”
“Do you mind helping me make breakfast? Everyone will wake up soon, and if there’s no food ready, someone will have a fit. Don’t worry – I won’t tell Lance.” and she winks at him for the second time in as many days. Keith is about to question what she means when he remembers what Lance said at the diner: “I never let you make breakfast the next morning, even though you know how to cook, just because I like to tease you and pretend you don’t.”
“I won’t,” he laughs, a bit surprised.
She sets him up with a cutting board and onions and tomatoes, and it’s while he’s chopping the vegetables that Keith asks a question that’s been at the back of his mind since he got here.
“Can I ask you something?”
"What is it?”
“What was it about what Lance would say about me that made you think he liked me? Rachel said something similar at the airport, and I didn’t know he talked about me often, so…” he trails off, not sure how much he’s giving away, or how odd it might look that Lance’s supposed boyfriend is surprised he’s a topic of discussion in his family.
“Well I know you boys didn’t start off on the best note.”
“Oh.” Keith laughs fondly. Remembers the look of indignation on Lance’s face the first time they interacted. “Yeah, we didn’t.”
“But even when he complained about you it was always ‘Mama, I don’t understand how someone so infuriating is allowed to be so good-looking ’ –” Keith has to focus on not chopping his finger off at that. “– or ‘ Keith likes to act all cool and heartless and unbothered when I know that’s not true because I saw him feeding pieces of his sandwich to a squirrel before lab so I know he’s secretly a big softie ’. And then we stopped hearing about you for a while, and the next time we did, Lance was telling us that he aced his math exam because you helped him. It was all good things after that.”
And Keith knows it’s not his place, but he’s hungry for more, greedy for it, wants to know more about the person Lance would tell his family about and how they equated that person with Lance’s heart. So he asks, “... Like what?”
To her credit, instead of wondering Keith is asking her all this, Maria just laughs. “Sweet boy, there wasn’t a call Lance would send home that didn’t mention you in some way. It was always, ‘Keith this, Keith that, today Keith did this in class and it was the funniest thing I’ve ever seen, today is the first time I’ve seen Keith wear blue and I think he should wear colour more often because he looked really good, Keith can handle spicy food better than I thought he could, Keith might have the prettiest eyes I’ve ever seen, Mama, I was really upset today and Keith was the only one who made me feel better, Keith is studying biomedical engineering because his brother wears a prosthetic and he wants to be able to help others the same way – he’s one of the most amazing people I’ve ever met.’ Things like that, and for the last two years. We jumped the gun a little, telling him we knew you two were together before he told us himself, but he couldn’t have made it more obvious, and we were all coming here for the holidays, so we thought it was a perfect way to finally meet you.” She turns to look at him, where he’s already staring at her, gaping, onions and tomatoes long forgotten. “I’m glad you’re here, and I’m glad you’re with him. Lance has always been a romantic, you probably know that. He loves love and seeing him being so happy in love with you makes me feel very grateful for you. You’re very important to him, Keith.”
And Keith can’t think, can’t breathe, because this is a lot and everything he’s ever dreamt of hearing and it’s not real, he’s not really Lance’s boyfriend and Lance may love him as a friend but he’s not in love with him the way Keith is but his whole family seems to think so and everything they’re doing here is a lie and Lance might be fine with it but it’s breaking Keith’s heart hearing about how he’s hypothetically perfect for Lance but not really with him and he wants to cry he wants to be selfish and just cry for himself but he can’t do that so he just turns back to his cutting board, picks up the knife to keep chopping and says, only a little choked up, “He’s really important to me, too.”
(lance is one of the last to come down)
(he presses a kiss against keith’s cheek and it burns a mark into his skin he feels all day)
♡
“Hey, man”. Lance finds him shlumping on a sofa in the covered patio – as close to being in the storm as he can without getting soaked. “I’ve been looking for you, you’ve been M.I.A. all day. What’s up?” he says sitting beside him. And Keith considers telling him. Telling him what, exactly, he doesn’t quite know, but this is Lance’s vacation with his family and he brought Keith here with him and Keith isn’t going to ruin it because he can’t keep his stupid heart under control.
So he lies. “Nothing. I just like to take some time to myself when I go to new places to get used to everything.”
“Oh, cool.” Lance replies, scrolling through his phone. “Listen, a couple of my friends are throwing a Christmas party this week, you down with going?”
“Like on Christmas day? Your family isn’t doing anything then?”
“Nah, we don’t do much on actual Christmas, we celebrate more on the twenty-fourth. Besides, party’s not till ten.”
“Oh, okay. Yeah, sure.”
“Awesome,” Lance flashes him a smile full of straight white teeth. “We don’t have to stay for long – I know you don’t like being around people you don’t know. I mostly just wanna drop by to say hi to some friends.”
“That’s fine, Lance, we can stay as long as you want.” he says, even though he’d rather die than suffer and try and make small talk while Lance is off mingling. He’ll end up sticking to the kitchen, or wherever the alcohol is, get piss drunk, and make a fool of himself in front of Lance somehow before he wakes up with a horrible hangover with two advils and a glass of water by the bed. That’s what generally happens when Lance drags him to parties that Hunk and Pidge aren’t at, back at school.
“That’s nice of you, sweetheart,” he teases, and Keith’s traitorous stomach swoops anyways, “but I’m mostly going for posterity’s sake. I don’t wanna be a dick and be the one guy who doesn’t show, but I’d rather be at home.”
“Since when would you rather be at home than at a party?” Keith scoffs, feeling a little more steady as a throws out a teasing remark.
“Since I brought you to Cuba with me.” he says it like it’s a fact, and Keith loses his footing again. But before he can reply, Lance goes on to say, “Anyways, storm is supposed to clear up in the next day or two, so you better go to town with that aloe, pretty boy. I’m not gonna take you back to school looking like a candy apple, or a ghost. We gotta get you a tan.”
“Your mom gave me some chamomile stuff, too.” he mumbles.
“Oh, that lotion? That stuff is good. We’ll get you back to normal in no time.” And then he settles in besides Keith, pressed up against his side, making himself comfortable, and holding his phone at an angle where Keith can also see the videos he’s watching. Keith sighs, drops his head on Lance’s shoulder, and ignores the weight in his stomach.
♡
That night after dinner, Keith sits in the TV room, all aloe’d and chamomile’d up - thanks to Lance -, flipping through channels, while Lance takes his turn in the shower. He looks behind his shoulder when he feels a gentle pat to see Lance’s niece standing behind him, looking shy.
“Hi, Nadia,” he says, smiling at her.
“What are you doing?” she asks, with all the observational skills of any five year old.
“Just watching TV. You wanna watch something with me?” he asks her. She doesn’t respond, and instead comes around the couch to hop up and sit beside him. Taking her lack of response as an answer, Keith continues searching when she pipes up again.
“Do you like Disney?”
And if he’s honest, he hasn’t seen many Disney movies, but he’s not a troll, he knows that the only appropriate response to being asked that question by a child is a resounding “I love Disney.”
Like he thought, she perks up. “Want to watch Disney? Can we watch The Lion King?”
“Yeah! That’s my favourite movie.” he’s only lying a little bit.
She gets a DVD and sets the movie up like she’s done it a hundred times before, and something tells Keith she has.
The beginning starts playing and Keith can’t tell if it’s really been that long since he’s seen it, or if he maybe never has, since he can’t recognize a single thing.
“Are you sure this is The Lion King?” he asks her.
“Yeah, two.”
“The Lion King Two? There’s a second one?”
She pauses the movie and gasps at him so dramatically he has to make the effort to refrain himself from clutching at his chest because of how cute he found it. This family, man.
“You haven’t seen The Lion King Two?” she asks, as betrayed as a five year old can sound.
“Apparently not.”
“It’s the best one!” and she’s not shy anymore, sitting up on her knees and grabbing at Keith’s arm.
“I believe you,” and he really does. She knows what she’s talking about, Keith’s sure of it. “I’m excited to watch it.”
“Okay,” she giggles, and unpauses the movie, settling down right in Keith’s side, not relenting her grip on his arm – not that he minds.
Kiara is right about to go on her first hunt alone when Lance walks down the stairs.
“What’s going on down here?” he asks, “My favourite niece and my favourite boyfriend, watching my favourite movie without me?”
“Tío Lance! Keith hasn’t seen it!” she exclaims, excitedly, like it’s share-worthy news.
“What?” Lance gasps almost as dramatically as Nadia had, and it makes Keith smile wide enough for his cheeks to dimple. “He hasn’t?”
“No! But I’m fixing it.”
“She’s fixing it,” Keith confirms, as Lance flops down on the side Nadia hasn’t occupied.
“I hope you two don’t mind if I join you?” addressing his niece mostly.
“No, that’s okay. Can you make the sofa bigger?”
Keith starts to ask what she means before Lance pulls a lever and the sofa reclines backward while the front pulls up.
“She can’t figure out where the handle is,” Lance whispers in his ear as Nadia resumes her position and the movie.
“She’s really fucking cute,” Keith’s whispers back, low enough she won’t hear his swear.
“She’s my niece, isn’t she?”
And because Keith’s in a good mood he answers, “Yeah, that’ll do it.” catching a glimpse of the blush he brings to Lance’s face before sliding further down the couch.
He falls asleep before finishing the movie, and wakes up a few hours later with Nadia gone, and a blanket thrown over him and Lance. Keith tells himself there’s no point in going back to their room when they’re perfectly comfortable on this couch, smaller than their bed, where he and Lance are pressed up together much closer than they usually are, and goes back to sleep.
♡
Keith is grateful when the storm clears.
It’s not that Lance’s family isn’t wonderful, because they are, and they treat him like family despite only having been there for three days. Actually, maybe that is the problem. Because he and Lance are. Not. Actually. Together. The more time he spends with them, the guiltier he feels about lying to them, and the sorrier he feels for himself because he wants this. Wants to come home with Lance over vacations, wants to make breakfast with his mother, wants to expand his repertoire of Disney knowledge with his niece, wants the kisses Lance drops on his head or cheeks to be real, wants the arm Lance tosses over his shoulders or around his waist or the hand he grabs and swings back and forth when they’re buying groceries to be real and because Lance wants to do those things to Keith himself, not because they’ve got a lie to keep up.
So yeah, when the storm clears and the sand dries and his sunburn is gone and it’s okay to escape the house and Lance’s family because this way he doesn’t have to keep up an act around them, he’s grateful.
On second thought, he might not be all that grateful that his sunburn is gone because he’s currently sitting on a towel in the sand under the evening sun, Lance kneeling behind him to rub sunscreen over his back because “I’m not gonna let you turn into a piece of bacon again.” he can feel, without the sting from before, Lance’s hands on him. And honestly –
“Does it really take this long to put on sunscreen?” he asks.
Lance mumbles out “Just making sure it’s in there.”
“Oh, it’s in there.” Keith responds. “To the point where I think you’ve rubbed it directly in to my skin. It’s hardly even on me anymore. I’m probably gonna get sunburned again.”
The response he gets is the sound of the sunscreen bottle clicking open and closed, and the feeling of Lance’s hands on him again.
“Can’t let that happen,” and he says it lowly, and the combination of Lance’s quiet voice and his hands still lingering on Keith’s skin is enough for Keith to shake him off and turn around because the rest of the family isn’t out here yet, Lance doesn’t need to be putting on a show for anybody.
“I think that’s fine. Want me to do you?”
It’s not until Lance raises an eyebrow that Keith realizes –
“Wh – I mean, do you want me –”
“Yeah.” and he hands him the bottle and turns around and hello? Keith thinks to himself? Anyone in there? Can someone in there please take mercy on me and for once in my life let me think before opening my mouth?
And okay, maybe he lingers a little bit when putting the sunscreen onto Lance’s back, too, but it’s only fair.
They’re sitting – or, well, Lance is sitting in the sun chair, and Keith is laying on the ground ( “Seriously, why do I drag these out if you’re not even gonna use them?”) when he hears the sounds of the rest of them approaching. Approximately thirty seconds later, Nadia and Sylvio are both standing above him.
“Hello,” he blinks up at them.
“Wanna make sandcastles?” And so he does.
It’s while he’s sitting by himself, the kids having ran off into the water, that Lance comes to sit beside him.
“They like you.” he says.
“I’m just a shiny new toy.”
“Nah,” Lance says easily, leaning back onto his palms. “I’ve seen them around new people. They like you. They all do.” he says, turning back to look at the rest of his family. Turning back to Keith, he smiles and says “I’m glad.”
Keith smiles back, maybe a little more softly than he should, and says, “I like them, too.”
But.
He sighs.
“Lance,” he lets out, locking his eyes to the tide.
Sensing the change in Keith’s tone, Lance says nothing, but sits up straighter.
“How –” Keith starts, and he doesn’t even know what he wants to say, just knows he has to say something, before the guilt of lying to Lance’s family swallows him whole. “I feel so bad,” he settles on, “lying to everyone.”
In his peripheral, he can see Lance hang his head, fingers playing with the sand.
“Yeah,” he agrees. “Honestly, I didn’t think it would be this hard.”
This piques Keith’s interest, because he hadn’t seen any indication that Lance was struggling with this whole situation. Then again, he muses, he has subconsciously (maybe consciously, who can say?) been avoiding Lance, so he hasn’t been able to fully gauge how he might feel.
“I just feel shitty. They’re all so nice to me because they think you’re, like, madly in love with me.”
Lance says nothing.
He looks over at him, then. Lance is staring out at the ocean, face pensive, skin glowing in the orange glow of the setting sun, and he’s beautiful, and Keith has never, never wanted to kiss him more. He opens his mouth again, not knowing what’s about to come out, when - thankfully - Lance cuts him off.
“I’ll tell them after the new year. That we broke up. I’ll say the stress of studying for the MCATs and doing good in school was making me a jerk and I was taking it out on you and we decided to end it on good terms before things got too hairy.” And he looks upset but Keith doesn’t know why and he wants to ask why but he doesn’t know if he wants to hear the answer so instead he says, “Okay.”
♡
Things are different after that. It’s easier for them to put on an act in front of others, knowing this fake relationship has an expiration date.
But things are different when they’re alone too. The next few days, their conversations are shorter, stilted, they tease each other less, and Keith feels like he’s struggling to find something to talk about, to fill the silences that stretch on between them.
♡
Christmas Eve dinner isn’t fair.
For one reason, because there’s actually, actually mistletoe hanging from doorways like this is a bad Lifetime movie, and for a second reason, because Lance looks really, really good in dark jeans and a maroon button down with the top two buttons undone, and Keith would like nothing more than to grab him under that mistletoe and close the three inches of height Lance has over him and kiss the life right out of him.
And technically he can, they are supposed to be dating, but the problem is that Keith is a coward. So he won’t.
Also, Lance still hasn’t kissed him on the mouth yet, which probably means he doesn’t want to. And honestly that’s probably for the better, because Keith knows if he gets a taste of Lance once, letting go of this facade they’ve created will be that much harder.
He’s in the kitchen where Lance finds him making small talk with one of his cousins, who excuses himself when Lance wraps his arms around Keith’s middle from behind and rests his head on his shoulder.
“Hey, Keith,” he whispers, and he smells suspiciously –
“Are you drunk?” Keith laughs, putting his hands over Lance’s.
“Just a little – you know. Easier.”
“You’re easier?”
“No, silly,” Lance says into his neck, and Keith’s stomach does something funny. “Family gathering. Aunts and uncles and cousins asking me if I’m sure about medical school as if I’m not cut out for it and we’re not halfway done with third year and it’s way too late to change anything now. Easier to pretend I know what I’m talking about.”
Keith frowns then, and turns around.
Lance doesn’t let go when they’re standing face to face.
And because Keith maybe also had a drink or three, he puts his hands on Lance’s biceps instead of letting them dangle awkwardly at his side.
“You know you’re one of the smartest people I’ve ever met, right?”
Lance just pouts.
“Just. You shouldn’t let anything they say bother you. You got into one of the most competitive programs at school, and you’re still doing ridiculously well. You’re even good at math now.” he jokes.
“Thanks to you,”
“Nah, I just pushed you in the right direction. You figured the rest out on your own.”
“Maybe,” Lance is smiling now, and Keith smiles back, grateful that for now the bouts awkwardness that have started to sprout up between them are not present tonight.
“Don’t doubt yourself.” Keith finishes.
“Kind of hard to do that when I’ve got you in my corner.”
And if that doesn’t bring a blush to Keith’s face, then the realization that Lance has walked them backwards to press Keith against the counter will definitely do it.
“You’ve got a tan now,” Lance says lowly. There’s no one else in the kitchen. “It looks good.
You look really good, Keith.”
And Keith’s brain is both shutting down and going into overdrive and Lance’s head is much closer to his than it was a few seconds ago and there’s no one else in the kitchen when Lance leans in and wets his lips and starts to ask “Can I – ?”
“Lance!” comes Veronica’s call as she enters the kitchen. Lance drops his head onto Keith’s shoulder. “Mama says to – oh.” She says, spotting them and smirking. “Sorry, I’ll tell her you’re busy.” and she walks back out, but the moment – a moment, they just had a real life moment – is already shattered.
Lance clears his throat as he steps away from Keith, says, “I better go see what she wants.” and leaves him there, head spinning, heart in his throat.
Lance was about to kiss him. Lance was about to kiss him. In front of no one. There hadn’t been a single person they needed to convince in the room, hadn’t been a single person, period. Lance was about to kiss him, and it might’ve been because he was a little drunk, but even then, it also might’ve just been because he wanted to.
Keith feels that if he wore pearls, now would be an appropriate time to clutch at them.
♡
The rest of the dinner had passed without incident. They sat pressed up against each other at the crowded dinner table, sat pressed up against each other again on a couch that had more than enough room for them to leave some distance between them. Lance leaned close to whisper things in his ear he could’ve said normally. Keith isn’t exactly sure what’s happening but hell if he’s not hungry for more of it.
He goes to sleep that night, and for the first time since they got here, he feels hopeful.
♡
They spend the entirety of the next day on the beach.
They help each other with sunscreen again, hands lingering when they don’t need to.
Keith sits on the sun chair and Lance smiles and pushes his own closer.
“Wanna swim?” Lance asks him a little while later, and the sun is low in the sky, making everything pink and gold and Keith says, “Yeah.”
He stands up and brushes the sand off his back when he notices Lance coming closer with the same wolfish grin that makes Keith’s heart flip, but can only mean trouble.
“What?” he asks.
“Nothing,” Lance responds, even though his face screams that he’s planning something.
“Seriously, you look like kind of insane. Why are you smiling like that?” and Lance comes closer still and reaches his arms out and
Keith backs away, laughing and pointing an accusatory finger at him.
“You’re not gonna throw me over your shoulder like I’m a sack of potatoes or we’re in a Nicholas Sparks movie.”
“Maybe I am.” Lance says from across the chairs that Keith has put in between them.
“ No, Lance,” he tries to say it sternly but the laughter in his voice is undeniable.
“Maybe just a little,” and he darts around the chairs so quickly Keith trips over the sand in his haste to get away and usually he’s faster (Lance made them race once, he knows), but his stumble costs him and Lance is accustomed to the turf and he grabs him and really does throw him over his shoulder like he weighs nothing more than a sack of potatoes and isn’t actually an inch over six feet and the fight immediately drains out of Keith because damn, that’s really hot.
“I’m gonna knock you over, I hope you know that,” he says, blood rushing to his brain from where he’s hanging.
“Not if I drop you first,” Lance says, and he sounds smug and Keith lets out a quick “Nope.” before throwing all his weight forward and grabbing as far down Lance’s legs as he can.
He ends up sending them both crashing into the water and the gallon of ocean that goes up his nose is worth it when he hears the sound of Lance’s laughter.
They play rough with for a while, Keith shoving Lance under and doing his best to sit on his head to keep him down, Lance pushing Keith’s legs out from under him in retaliation – it’s on par for their usual behaviour, but there’s something new there too, when Lance reaches out to brush Keith’s sopping bangs out of his face, or when a sizeable wave crashes over them and he grabs onto Keith’s hand to keep them from getting too far when they could just easily swim back to each other, instead.
When they get tired of being in the water, they let the waves carry them back to shore, where they sit just close enough for the tide to lap at their feet. They stare at the sun as it dips into the sea. Or at least, Lance does. Keith alternates between that, and staring at him. Wavy hair made even curlier by the salt water, sun turning his sandy brown hair even lighter and bronze skin darker. He’s got more freckles over his nose and cheeks and shoulders than Keith’s ever seen on him, the golden light of the setting sun making the drops of water sticking to his skin shine like starlight and making those blue eyes of his look almost green and Keith is so, so in love with him that in the moment he feels like he can hardly breathe.
Lance looks over then, and instead of asking why Keith’s staring at him like a fool he just flashes him a smile of white teeth and dimpled cheeks and says, “Merry Christmas, Keith.”
♡
He finishes getting ready for the Christmas party before Lance does.
He stood in front of the mirror in their room for longer than he’s willing to admit trying on different combinations of the shirts and shorts he brought, before remembering “You’ve got a tan now, it looks good. You look really good, Keith.” and settles on a white button down and red shorts. If it just so happens that it makes his tan stand out more, well. So be it.
He’s watching some cartoon in Spanish with the kids when Lance comes down the stairs, and if Keith wasn’t so busy blatantly checking him out, he might’ve noticed Lance doing the same.
He’s wearing a teal Hawaiian shirt (and it should be illegal how Lance can non-ironically wear one of the most ironic pieces of clothing and still manage to look so good), navy shorts, and the contrast of the bright shirt against his golden skin makes Keith’s mouth dry.
“You ready?” he asks, coming over to where Keith is sitting.
“As much as I can be,” Keith responds, standing up.
“You’ll be fine,” Lance laughs, walking out of the house. “remember, I just wanna drop by for a while to –”
“Say hello,” Keith interrupts, “yeah, I know.”
“Just stick with me,” Lance steps closer and their arms brush, “I won’t let you out of my sight,” and he winks, and Keith looks away before Lance can catch the blush he can feel rushing into his face.
My pleasure, he thinks.
♡
Keith comes to the conclusion, well into his fourth cup of – he sniffs it – something, that maybe the party isn’t so bad.
It could be the alcohol running through his veins, it could be the fact that, true to his word, Lance hasn’t let him out of his sight – in fact, he hasn’t let him sway far from his side at all –, regardless, he’s enjoying himself.
They’re squished together on a couch, Lance’s arm resting on the sofa behind him, and Keith’s talking to someone he can’t remember the name of about school.
He feels a weight on his thigh and glances down to see that Lance, immersed in his own conversation with someone on his other side, has dropped his hand from the sofa to Keith’s leg, and the sight mingles well with the buzz in his brain to make him giddy. The girl he’s talking to spots the smile on his face and leans in conspiratorially. “You two are really cute together, by the way,” she says, “I’ve known Lance for a while – he always comes to these parties with someone, but I’ve never seen him look as happy as he does tonight.” And her words kind of give him whiplash. He wants to feel hurt that Lance has brought other people as dates, but 1.) of course he has, he can do whatever he wants and that was before this, and 2.) this isn’t real. So he focuses on what that little spark of hope in his chest latches onto.
“Yeah?” he asks.
She makes a sound of affirmation. “Have you been together long?”
Keith racks his brain for the fake anniversary Lance had set for them. “A year in January.” And he wants to be sad that it isn’t true but Lance’s hand is aimlessly moving over his thigh now and all Keith’s gremlin mind can settle on is ‘hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhheeeeehhhhheeeeeeeeeee’.
“That’s sweet,” she smiles, and leans in even closer. He puts in the effort to focus on what she’s saying. “Do you love him?” and that clears his mind.
He’s silent at first, but for the first time ever, in a country that’s not his own in a house full of people he doesn’t know to a girl he can’t remember the name of he finally admits, out loud, “Yeah.” he nods his head. “I love him.”
He thinks he might feel Lance’s hand squeeze his knee.
♡
He stumbles out of the bathroom to find Lance leaning on the wall across from him in an otherwise empty hallway.
“You gotta pee?” he asks, with all the eloquence he can muster after five drinks.
Lance doesn’t answer him at first. Just looks at him before shaking his head and stepping forward.
“I wanted,” he says, slowly, “to ask you something.”
“O–okay.”
But he doesn’t continue, just steps forward again, and for the second time in as many days Keith finds himself alone with Lance, backed up against a surface.
“Lance?” he prompts, and Lance is a little wobbly, and his cheeks are flushed, but his eyes are clear with intent and nothing besides liquid courage can be chalked up to the alcohol.
He knows what Lance is going to ask, knows it before Lance even opens his mouth, knows what his answer is going to be, and it has him leaning closer to the other boy.
“I wanted to know,” he starts, “if I could –” and Keith can’t wait, doesn’t want a repeat of yesterday so he says “Yeah.” before he gets a chance to finish, and Lance smiles a little and comes a little closer and –
“Oh, shit.”
Except it doesn’t come from either of them.
“Sorry, sorry,” It’s someone from the party, “I gotta go,” he sing songs, shoving past Keith a little where he’s standing against the bathroom door. “Don’t mind me, sorry for interrupting.” and he closes the door, but like yesterday the moment is gone and Keith wants to yell because that’s not fair that Lance set these stupid rules about asking to kiss him in front of others but he’s never done it and others still think they’re cute or in love or whatever else anyways and Lance only ever makes moves when they’re alone and that’s not part of their charade and like yesterday Lance is pulling away and he’s probably going to leave Keith here alone again and Keith is going to have to go back out into the party and pretend it didn’t happen and he’s just about ready to shake it off but Lance isn’t turning around like he thought he would and he’s not leaving him in the hallway, instead he looks at him and reaches down to knock their hands together and –
“You wanna get outta here?”
♡
Lance and Keith’s relationship starts a little something like this.
♡
On the walk back, Lance is quiet, and for once, Keith isn’t determined to break him out of it. He figures they both have things they need time to say.
They reach the house, and instead of going inside, Lance grabs his hand and leads him around it, leads him to the beach.
He doesn’t let go of Keith’s hand until they stop walking; reaches down to take off his shoes and socks and walks further towards the water. Keith follows suit.
The sky is clear and black and filled with stars, and Keith can’t tell where the sky ends and the water starts and feels a little breathless at how big everything seems.
“It’s kinda scary,” Lance starts.
He doesn’t continue, so Keith hedges, “The ocean at night?”
“Sure,” Lance lets out a chuckle.
And they fall back into silence.
Keith, like he always does, is the one to break it.
“Can I ask you something?” he wants to be the one with the question this time.
Lance doesn’t say anything, but he nods, and Keith figures that if there was ever a time to think before he speaks, it’s now, standing on the precipice of something that feels much bigger than what he can control.
“Why do you only ever try to kiss me when there’s no one around?” he says it so quietly he’s worried the wind might blow it away, but Lance hears him anyways, closes his eyes and shoves his hands into his pockets, says, “You know why.”
And Keith – he might have an idea, but it’s an idea that he’s felt for the last two year has been far, far out of his reach.
“Not really.” he lies, “This was your idea, Lance. This whole thing was so people would think we’re together. You know what people do when they’re together? They kiss,” and he can tell he probably sounds like a blathering idiot but he’s been holding this in for the past week and it’s high time he let it out. “You haven’t kissed me once when someone could see us. You wait until we’re alone to ask, and when we get caught, you stop. Why? What’s the point? If you wanted people to think we’re together, if you brought me here to have people believe we’re together then why –”
“Because I don’t want anyone to be there when I kiss you, Keith. It’s that simple.” and he says it like it really is that simple but he’s still not saying what Keith needs to hear so –
“Maybe to you, but not to me. I need you to say it.”
And Lance is quiet, and he won’t look at Keith and –
“Look at me, Lance,”
– and Lance does and his eyes are dark in the minimal moonlight and Keith can’t find anything in them can’t find the answers he’s looking for so he needs to hear Lance say it –
“Why do you want us to be alone?”
“Because when we’re alone,” he takes a breath, “it’s real.”
♡
Keith says nothing.
He doesn’t need to, because Lance’s floodgates seem to have opened.
“When we’re alone, when it’s just you and me, it’s real, and I want – ” he blows out a frustrated breath. “I want it to be real. I want it to be real when I hug you, or when I hold your hand, or when I call you my boyfriend. I want it to be real when we have a one year anniversary, or when I take you to dinner to your favourite restaurant. I want it to be real when we sleep in the same bed. I want it to be real when I bring you home to meet my family. I want it to be real when I kiss you, Keith, and I want it to be real when you tell people you love me, because –
Because I love you. I love you, I am in love with you, for real and it’s scary, and it’s hard, –” he looks pained and a little bit frazzled, but he continues, “to see you here, and want to be with you, and want to kiss you, and I can’t because it’s what I’ve wanted for years and now that I can take it I don’t want it because it isn’t real.”
Keith gapes at him, and his heart is pounding pounding pounding wanting to break right out of his chest and he doesn’t know what to say, for all he speaks without thinking he cannot for the life of him find the words now.
“I think,” Lance continues softly at Keith’s silence, head craning upwards, “that’s why my family thought we were dating.” He pauses. “Because I talk about you like you put the moon in the sky.”
And for some reason, that springs Keith back into action because here’s the boy he’s been pining after for years, confessing under the moon and stars, in front of the endless ocean, that he’s in love with him, has been pining back just as hard, and Keith’s standing there like a statue.
“We’re alone, now,” he says.
Lance looks back at him.
“We’re alone, so it’s real,” and pauses for a moment, gathers the courage to ask for the one thing he’s been wanting wanting wanting for almost as long as he’s known Lance –
“Can I kiss you?”
Lance smiles, and finally, finally, he holds Keith’s face between his hands, closes the small gap between them, and kisses him.
And kisses him.
And kisses him.
♡
They climb the tree back into their room, fumbling, pushing, laughing and hushing each other.
Lance presses kisses into Keith’s mouth, onto his forehead, his nose, his cheeks, pushes him down onto the bed and presses more kisses onto his jaw, down his neck, unbuttons his shirt and pulls it off, kisses his collarbone, further down his chest, back onto his mouth to shush him when Keith sighs a bit too loudly, lips warm, skin warmer, hearts beating lightning fast.
♡
Later, when they’re laying next to each other, Keith says, “By the way,” Lance looks over at him, “I might be a little bit in love with you, too.” and Lance smiles.
And Keith says, “also, by ‘might’ I mean definitely and by ‘a little bit’ I mean a whole fucking lot.” and Lance kisses him again.
♡
Later again, when dawn is breaking, Lance mumbles into Keith’s hair – where they lay, chest to back staring out the window as the sun is kissing the sky good morning, “I love you.”
♡
Lance doesn’t ask to kiss Keith when the clock strikes midnight on New Year’s. Just grabs his waist and pulls him in and does it. There’s people yelling all around them, and Keith clutches at Lance’s hair and kisses back and it’s hard when he’s smiling so wide. But they manage.
