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Plagg was bored. Capital B bored. The type of bored that made him angry he was bored. The kind that made him want to howl and hiss and chew. Bite someone’s ankles. Glare angrily with his tail lashing. Shred something with his claws.
Destroy something.
Like maybe that eyesore of an Eiffel Tower. And maybe it would stay dead this time, with no akuma to prompt Ladybug’s ‘undermine all of Plagg’s hard work!’ creation spell. C’mon, why'd the sugar cube have to be such a stickler for recreating things the way they were when Plagg knew she could make them better .
She was the one who gave the apes opposable thumbs after all.
He’d even suggested a few times what she could replace the Eiffel Tower with, A grand cat scratch tree, for example. He’d been a good boy, after all, surely he deserved some recognition.
But no. She was a stickler for the rules.
And that made Plagg grumpy. Grumpy, bored… and hungry .
His store of cheese had already been eaten (honestly, how did Adrien expect him to control himself when confronted with a whole wheel of the good stuff! He was destruction, not conservation.) And, as Plagg phased his head through Adrien’s bag, Adrien and his stupid model thingy looked like it was just starting.
Adrien was gonna come back and find everything in his bag shredded if he wasn’t careful. Maybe even some poop in the corner.
Plagg sighed and angrily rubbed his paws over his head. It wasn’t good to feel like this. He needed something to take the edge of his anger. Accidents happened when he got ‘moody’ as Tikki called it.
She just didn’t understand the nature of the cat.
Peeking out of the bag again, he took stock of his location and noticed, with absolute feral delight, that they were in the park next to the ‘Purincesses’ home, and said girl was currently on her terrace pretending not to swoon over her crush. Were those binoculars? Wow. She had it bad.
Marinette on the terrace meant Tikki was close.
And that meant, Plagg could absolutely mess with her.
Adrien wouldn’t mind if he just nipped off for a quick visit. After all, he’d be glad Plagg’s restraint included not shredding his homework. The excuse of ‘The cat ate my homework’ was getting old.
Plagg zoomed. He darted straight from Adrien’s back to the closest tree, then whooshed over to the building to hide against the brickwork before zipping his way around to Marinette’s terrace.
“Hello, Purrincess!” Plagg announced, pouncing on her.
Marinette shrieked in surprise and dropped her binoculars. She managed to catch them and hide them behind her back before she’d even seen who called her name. “You’re not Chat,” she accused, staring at the kwami. “Plagg? Why are you here?”
“Were you expecting him?” Plagg snickered.
“He does like to sneak up on me.”
“Sorry to disappoint, my boy is still fast asleep. He’s even more of cat than I am. Which means I’m starving .”
“It's nearly twelve and he’s still asleep?”
“What can I say. Puberty and sleep come hand in hand.” Plagg snickered again. “Plus, teenage boy, there’s something else that comes in hand and--”
Marinette shrieked and covered her ears. “I’m not hearing this!”
Plagg chortled.
“You’re being mean,” Tikki scolded, floating out of the flowering bush on Marinette’s terrace, the edges of her mouth still covered in aphids. “She’s not going to be able to look him in the eye now.”
Plagg scratched his cheek. “You got a little something there, sugar cube.”
Tikki swiped at her face, gathering up the aphids and stuck them in her mouth. “Why are you here?”
“I’m starving .” Plagg floated up to Marinette, and he overexaggerated weakness to garner sympathy. “Please, Purrincess. He never feeds me. I’m wasting away here. Have a little pity on a poor kitty and save me from dying.”
Marinette narrowed her eyes at him. “You’re lying. Chat might be a lot of things, but not taking care of you won’t be one of them. You are far too vocal about not being fed.”
Tikki giggled.
Plagg glared. Feeling mean on top of the hunger, he twisted so he faced the park. “Why are you watching him for anyway? Does he have cheese?” He drifted down closer and peered. “He’s rather mangy, isn’t he?” he said and then loftily announced. “My boy is so much prettier.” 
Tikki’s jaw dropped and she buzzed in anger as she scolded, “Plagg!”
Marinette made a noise like a tea kettle that had been left on too long. “That’s Adrien Agreste! How dare you call him mangy!”
“He is mangy,” Plagg teased. “Look at that messy hair of his. He probably thinks he’s kwami’s gift to the world.”
Marinette folded her arms on her chest and glared. “Adrien is kind and sweet and nice and I won’t have you talking about him like that.”
Plagg smirked. “You know who else is kind and sweet and nice? My boy. He’s so much better than that kid.”
“The same kind and sweet and nice boy you just claimed wasn’t feeding you?” Marinette returned. “Chat is wonderful, but he’s no Adrien Agreste.”
Plagg burst into laughter so hard he fell out of the air and plopped onto the deck chair on Marinette’s terrace.
“Plagg, stop it,” Tikki warned. She floated down to poke him in the belly. “You’re insufferable. Why are you doing this?”
“What’s wrong with him?” Marinette asked, leaning over the hysterical kwami.
Tikki huffed out a noisy sigh. “If we feed him, he might go away.”
Instantly, Plagg was back in the air, with one paw on his chest and the other one up. “I promise. Feed me and I’ll go away.”
“Maman always said if you feed a cat, they keep coming back,” Marinette said. “I made that mistake with Chat already.”
“Yes, but we like Chat,” Tikki muttered.
“You like me too,” Plagg whined. He pounced on her, rubbing his head against hers. “Don’t you, sugar cube? Or do I need to keep coming back to remind you of how much you love me.”
Tikki rolled her eyes and shoved him away.
“You are such fun to play with. I missed this, sugar cube. We should totally do it more.”
“You are incorrigible, Plagg.”
“What does he eat?” Marinette asked. “Cookies like you?”
“Cheeeeeeese,” Plagg said, trying not to drool. “Camembert.”
Marinette’s lips quirked up. “What a shame. We don’t have any. Lactose intolerant. Guess you’ll be on your way. Bother Chat, I’m sure he needs to wake up.”
Plagg gasped and pretended to faint. “No cheese? No cheeeeese ? How could you? How could you live in bakery and have no cheese? How will I survive?”
“Here we go,” Tikki said, rolling her eyes.
Plagg dramatically reached for the sun, pretending to wither away. “What a world, what a world? How cruel and cold can it be?”
“Is he always like this?” Marinette asked, bewildered by Plagg’s antics.
“Worse.” Tikki floated over Plagg. “If I make you some cheese, will you go home?”
Plagg perked up. “What happened to ‘never using our powers for personal gain’? Are you that desperate to be rid of me?”
“It's not personal gain,” Tikki responded, turning her nose up to Plagg. “You shouldn’t be away from Chat for long. What happens if he goes looking for you?”
“Your cheese is the absolute best,” Plagg said, almost purring with delight. “Please? Purr-lease ?”
“I should just make you a cow and you can do your own cheese,” Tikki replied.
Plagg waved his paw. “We tried that once. It didn’t work. Besides, I don’t look very nice as a cow.”
Tikki covered her mouth as she giggled. “It ruined the mooood .”
“There’s my punny sugar cube!” Plagg crowed.
Marinette looked between the two kwami, sighed and headed for her trap door. “Stay here. Let me see what I can find.”
Tikki buzzed straight to Plagg as Marinette disappeared below. “What are you doing?”
“I’m bored ,” Plagg whined. “Adrien’s been at the photoshoot all day and I’ve been stuck in his bag. It's not my fault it's lonely. And his phone’s out of battery,” he added as an afterthought.
Tikki sighed and patted him on the head. “You really are a child of chaos, aren’t you? You’re lucky you’re adorable.”
“You’re adorable,” Plagg replied, purring.
“You’re buttering me up so you’ll get cheese.”
“What can I say? You’re that good at creating it.”
“You really shouldn’t leave him alone,” Tikki said.
“He needs more friends than just me,” Plagg said, suddenly serious. He swooped down and wrapped his paws around Tikki. “If we could just tell them each other’s identities…”
She stroked his head. “You know we can’t. Not until Adrien comes into his powers more. He’s still at risk succumbing to akuma’s powers. Once he can resist, then we can tell them.”
“I’m working on it,” Plagg said. “But you can’t blame that on just Adrien. Marinette is still falling back on the timer too.”
Tikki sighed. “I know. They’re so young and they’re trying so hard.”
“His father barely lets him out to see Nino anymore, Tikki,” Plagg said mournfully. “I don’t know how much longer it will be before Adrien’s at risk of an akuma himself. I keep him distracted as much as I can, but he has limits.”
“By distracting, you actually mean you be a little shit.”
Plagg laughed. “It's what I do best. If he’s angry and exasperated with me, he’s not depressed.”
“We should encourage this Marinette Chat Noir friendship then,” Tikki replied with a sage nod. “It will be good for both of them.”
“They seem to be doing well enough on their own,” Plagg said. “We don’t need to interfere in everything.”
Tikki laughed. “Since when did you not want to interfere?”
“Since Marinette is bringing me cheese. Anyone who gives me cheese deserves praise!”
“You are so easy to please,” Tikki said, shaking her head.
“Cheese and pats, what else in life is there?”
“I’m offended.”
“Cheese and Tikki pats,” Plagg amended.
“That’s better.”
Movement from downstairs as Marinette returned. Climbing through the trapdoor, she said, “I found some brie, will that do?”
Plagg darted over to her and motioned ‘gimme’ with his paws. “It's not Camembert, but I’ll take it.”
“Manners,” Marinette chided, holding the brie away from the kwami.
“What are those?” Plagg questioned, copying childlike innocence. He fluttered his eyelashes and made feeble grabs at the cheese.
With a stern frown, Marinette kept it away from him. “Don’t give me that. You are definitely old enough to know.”
“I’m destruction,” Plagg complained. “I don’t need manners. People should give me things to keep me calm.” He grinned at her and taunted, “In case I decide to destroy stuff. Like your underwear drawer for example.”
Marinette smirked at the kwami. “Do that, and you’ll never get cheese. And I’ll tell Chat Noir what you’ve been doing while he’s not aware. I’m sure he’d love to know how you’re risking his identity and his miraculous by zipping around Paris in broad daylight.”
Plagg’s eyes widened and he nodded in approval. “You would’ve made a good Chat Noire.”
“I make a better Ladybug.” She waved the cheese in his face. “So?”
Dramatically, Plagg fell to his knees in the air. “Please, oh great and merciful Ladybug, bestow upon me the gift of the cheese.”
“It's really obvious where Chat gets his dramatic flare from,” Marinette replied and handed over the cheese. “Now, head back to him before he finds out your missing.”
The brie was gone in a single gulp and Plagg licked his paws clean. “Next time, get Camabert, or kiss goodbye to your underwear drawer,” he said and zipped away laughing as he was followed by Marinette’s screeching protest.
Chat Noir really didn’t know why Ladybug was yelling at him to take better care of his kwami and not be a lazy cat and spend all day in bed. Nor did he understand why she kept looking at his hands and blushing scarlet, or why she was muttering about Camembert in underwear drawer to stop ‘wandering paws.’
When he asked Plagg, the kwami just laughed.