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Yu Yang’s phone vibrates in his pocket. It’s kind of packed on the subway, but he manages to fish it out without incident. When he sees his new message, he smiles.
‘I miss you.’
It hasn’t even been hours since Li Huan left the city to visit his father for Chinese New Year. In fact, Yu Yang is currently on his way back to his dorm after sending Li Huan off. He’ll be spending the Spring Festival alone this year.
The decision to not go home wasn’t an easy one to make, but Yu Yang knows he wasn’t going to be accepted there, and he wouldn’t be able to get into the spirit of celebrating, so there was no point. When he told his boyfriend he’d just be staying on campus, he wanted to stay back with him. It was super endearing, he kissed Li Huan all over with gratitude, but then held his face gently and told him that he had to go see his dad, and spend the holiday with him. Li Huan’s face became knitted up like it always does when he’s debating something in his head, and Yu Yang waited patiently while smiling at his cuteness. When he was done, he invited Yu Yang to go back with him.
It shocked Yu Yang, to be honest. He never considered this possibility because it’s such a big deal, but that’s just the way Li Huan does things, he supposed. He said no though, after giving it a moment of thought. He couldn’t just intrude like that, and besides, he wasn’t sure they should spring the fact they’re dating on Li Huan’s dad. They could try to hide it, but knowing the two of them, they wouldn’t be very efficient at it. From what Yu Yang’s heard about Li Huan’s dad, he’ll probably be accepting, but still, you never know, and it’s not a risk he wants to take.
So, after spending a lazy morning in bed, in which Yu Yang believes Li Huan was holding onto him tighter than usual, they got up and got ready to leave. They stalled at the door, because Li Huan kept wanting goodbye kisses, and Yu Yang was more than happy to provide them. He was glad all of Li Huan’s roommates already left, otherwise they wouldn’t have had this luxury.
“I don’t want to leave you,” Li Huan whispered against Yu Yang’s lips.
“Hey, it’s just for what, a week? Besides, you’ll be having so much fun and eating so much food, you won’t even think of me!” As the words left Yu Yang’s mouth, he realised how much he didn’t want Li Huan to go either. A week is going to pass by slower than usual since he won’t be doing much, and maybe he clutched onto Li Huan’s sleeves after this thought, just to keep him close for a moment longer.
Li Huan, in the meantime, was looking at Yu Yang with an incredulous expression. “You know there isn’t a single moment where I’m not thinking of you.” He says these things so frankly, bares his heart to Yu Yang all the time, and it never fails to make Yu Yang blush. He kisses his boyfriend again.
“You’re such a sweetheart.”
And then he dragged Li Huan out the door, because he’d miss his train if he didn’t leave now. Although, maybe he was trying to do just that. At the station, they’d shared a chaste hug before Li Huan had to run to board his train.
‘I miss you too~ Eat lots of food for me!’
Li Huan doesn’t send another message for rest of the ride back, and Yu Yang starts to think about what he’s going to be eating. He isn’t sure the cafeteria will have a lot of food, and most, if not all, of the restaurants are going to be closed for a few days. He decides to stop by a grocery store to buy some things, and maybe some decorations too. He’ll liven up the place for himself.
As expected, Yu Yang doesn’t hear from Li Huan much. He got a message telling him he’s arrived, but that’s about it.
On New Year’s Eve, he does a bit of drinking. It’s a festival; he’s watching the celebration on TV alone; his boyfriend is elsewhere—this is how he copes. Naturally, in his somewhat-drunken state, he texts Li Huan when the clock hits twelve.
‘Happy Chinese New Year, my love! Ah, I really miss you. Remember how our first few kisses were when either one of us were intoxicated? I’m drunk now, but you’re not by my side.’
He also sends a selfie with a pouty expression for emphasis.
To his surprise, he gets a reply not even a minute later.
‘Happy Lunar New Year. I really miss you too.’
Yu Yang’s a bit disappointed that’s all he got, but it’s better than nothing. He rereads the message over and over again, and it takes away some of his loneliness. When he hears fireworks being set off outside, he sits on the balcony to watch. He’s so mesmerised by the colours and patterns, and the cool air against his skin, that he doesn’t realise he’s gotten another message. He only sees it after he goes to send a picture of his view to his boyfriend.
It’s an audio message, and Yu Yang holds his phone against his ear after pressing play.
“I really want to kiss you too. Don’t drink too much, take care of yourself. I wish you were here.”
Yu Yang is being warmed from the core, and he knows it’s not from the alcohol. He closes his eyes and replays the message, imagining Li Huan whispering it into his ear. He can hear fireworks in the background, and there are still fireworks in front of him right now.
In this moment, Yu Yang is with Li Huan; they’re sitting here together, Li Huan’s arm wrapped around his waist, Yu Yang resting his head on his shoulder. If he opens his eyes, he’ll make eye contact with his boyfriend, and see the light show being reflected. Then, they’ll close the distance between them, and as their lips make contact, sparks will fly.
By the fourth day of the holiday, the bustle has mostly settled down. The big celebrations are over, most people are just visiting family and other relatives. Since Yu Yang’s not in his hometown, there’s no one for him to see, so he just stays inside. Tomorrow, if the weather’s nice, he decides he’ll go for a walk.
Sometime in the afternoon, there’s a knock at his door. Yu Yang finds it suspicious, since there aren’t many people on campus, and anyone else would’ve texted him to ask if he was home before coming over. He cautiously goes to open his door, but throws it open once he gets a glimpse of who it is.
Li Huan stands before him, panting slightly. He has on a white cap, a white jacket with black details, black track pants, and, slung over his shoulder, his duffle bag. Yu Yang’s frozen for a moment, unable to believe that he’s really here, and then recovers to pull Li Huan in by the hand, slamming the door behind him, cutting off the taller man’s greeting.
Yu Yang makes Li Huan drop his bag and then all but jumps on him. Li Huan catches him easily, of course, holding him steady as he folds his legs around his torso. Yu Yang throws his head back and laughs, before wrapping his arms around Li Huan’s neck, clinging onto him. When he pulls back, he kisses him once, and then again, before asking, “What are you doing here?”
A simple shrug is all he gets in reply, and then he frowns, because did something happen? Li Huan notices his expression, and then elaborates. “I just wanted to come home early so I could be with you.”
“How’d you get out of it?” Yu Yang is genuinely curious.
“My dad and I only celebrated New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day. There isn’t really any family for us to visit, so…” Li Huan trails off, and Yu Yang places a hand against his cheek with a tender expression. He smiles as he adds, “Plus, I wanted to spend time with my boyfriend, and nothing’s going to stop me.”
Yu Yang beams back at him.
As it turns out, Li Huan brought back some of the food he had with his dad—dumplings, fish, rice cakes, noodles. There’s a lot, and Yu Yang has no doubt they’ll be eating this for the rest of the week. And he’s perfectly fine with it, because he’ll be eating it with Li Huan, who has temporarily moved into his dorm.
It’s great, having this space all to themselves. Sometimes Yu Yang gets caught off guard by the domesticity of it all, and it has him thinking about the future, of what a shared apartment between them would be like. He can picture Li Huan cooking for them at a stove, wearing an apron, while he watches on the side, trying to steal some food. He can picture the two of them sitting on their couch, watching a movie together, and then falling asleep in each other’s arms. Most of all though, he can picture their bed, and that’s as far as he goes, because his face starts to heat up.
One night they’re strolling the athletics field, when Li Huan suddenly stops in his tracks. Yu Yang turns around, confused, and finds his boyfriend holding out a red envelope. He shakes it when Yu Yang doesn’t take it, so he does, albeit suspiciously.
“You didn’t really give me money, did you?” Yu Yang tilts his head, lost. Li Huan already does so much for him; he’s adamant about paying for their dates, and does other sweet little things.
Li Huan doesn’t say anything, instead gesturing for Yu Yang to open it. When he peers into the envelope, he finds a piece of paper. He breathes a silent sigh of relief, but he’s still confused. And then, once he pulls it out, he recognises Li Huan’s neat handwriting on it. The note says:
‘I hereby declare that I, Li Huan, will make up for all the kisses we’ve missed.’
And then in smaller print, underneath:
‘(There’s an unlimited amount.)’
Yu Yang gapes up at his boyfriend, who’s just openly watching him, and holds the piece of paper close to his heart. There’s a fluttering in his stomach from the butterflies—even after all this time Li Huan still has the ability to make this feel so new, so exciting. He doesn’t know what he did to deserve him.
He steps up onto his tippy toes, places a hand behind Li Huan’s neck, and pulls him down to kiss him. It’s gentle, it’s sweet, and Yu Yang savours the feeling of Li Huan’s lips against his own. They stand in the middle of the field, with the lights of nearby buildings acting like the stars in the sky. The air is cold, but they don’t feel it. They’re like the core of the Earth, the heat burns from the centre of their bodies and spreads outwards. Emptiness surrounds them. They’re the only ones that matter.
“There’s one,” Yu Yang says after, breathy, “of the infinite number of kisses to come.”
Li Huan covers his mouth with his own again, but pulls back before Yu Yang can really respond. “And that’s two,” he replies. “Happy New Year.”