Chapter Text
"W-wait…this is Loki?"
Ahh…Clint Barton. No matter what universe I find him in he still as sharp as ever. It was really quite a feat, I had just teleported myself into this reality (one that looked staggeringly like my own), and in mere hours I was already surrounded my SHIELD agents.
"Hello Clint," I said with my hands raised to my chest, trying to seem as harmless as possible. Hawkeye, in his out of date leotard, and Black Widow, with her uncomfortable looking skin suit stood in front of me like wolves…well, confused wolves…but still wolves.
"How can this be Loki? He looks kind a…kind a…"
"One Direction-y?" I asked with a smile.
We really did have to stop meeting like this.
Clint pulled his arrow back, "Don't get smart with me Loki. Just because you changed your look doesn't mean your any less of a threat."
I see…so, in this reality, this universe I had so wonderfully decided to vacation in, Loki was still mistrusted and hated. Well, that's what I get for leaving in such a hurry.
"What are you doing here?" Black Widows asked as she stepped forward, "And don't even try to lie." Her mouth cocked a sly grin, "We both know how that'll turn out."
I only shrugged my shoulders and smiled. "Okay then. I'm Loki Laufeyson from an alternate reality, and in this reality I am the reincarnation of an old Loki that died. In order to completely change my story (and my fate) I've been taking up secret missions for the All-Mother, and with each mission completed one of my past misdeeds as Loki is erased…kind of…any way, I totally found out that my past self (whose really my future self) had been working with the All Mother and says that really, there's no way I can change and become a hero like my big brother Thor—you know Thor right?—And there's no way he could have been lying because he had the sword of truth lodged into his chest. I quit being the 'Agent of Asgard'—which is a pity because it had a nice ring to it—and I went back to my apartment. Then I said 'You know what? I'm gonna go on vacation,' whipped up a little spell to send me to another reality where I could relax a little. Maybe meet some girls—or guys, I'm not really picky—and try and sort out my future."
There…nothing but the truth.
"That's bullshit," Widow said as she raised a…was that a gun? What the Hel was she doing with a gun? Seems a little…blunt for the Black Widow, does it not?
I only rolled my eyes.
"Get up, we're going to the tower…see what everyone else has to say about this." Clint waved his hands, and—like magic, really—the SHIELD agents had disappeared. But not really, knowing SHIELD, they were still keeping tight tabs on me. Clint leaned in close to my face, he breath smelled of pickles, "SHIELD may not have the means to keep you locked up, but Avengers Tower certainly does."
He grabbed me by my green shirt, hoisted me up, and off we went.
I tried to hold back a smile, but I simply could not suppress it. Just a few hours in, and I was already having a great time!
Granted…my accommodations let a lot to be desired. The metal chains that bound my wrist were going to leave marks…I just knew it, and I was locked behind a clear plastic cell that surrounded me on all sides.
"Comfy there, trickster?"
And here he have Tony Stark. The same stupid goatee. The same light glowing from his chest. The same smug eyebrows that were in desperate need of waxing.
"Very comfy, thank you." I smiled and tried to wave. Before me stood Hawkeye, in all his purple glory, Black Widow, Captain America, that Banner fellow, and of course, Mr. Stark.
"Uh…where's Thor?" I asked. No Avengers meet up would be complete without him around.
Stark only rolled his eyes, "Don't act like you don't know."
Except I wasn't acting. First day in this new world…and it's pretty much exactly like the old one.
Captain America leaned into Clint, his hand over his mouth trying to hide his speech, (but I could still hear him. I mean, I'm a god, aren't I?)
"This is Loki? He looks…so young." Steve looked up and down, from my black boots, to my wrinkled shirt, and messed up hair. If I knew I was going to be stared at, I would have dressed a little better.
"So," Stark said tapping on the glass, "Just so you know, this glass has been magically reinforced by some of the best minds around."
I tried—and I mean really tried—not to roll my eyes. There was absolutely no magic around this cell at all. No charms. No runes. Hel, I bet their refrigerator was better protected. If this was the greatest magic their reality had to offer then there was a serious problem.
"What's your game Loki?" Steve asked, "And don't get any ideas either. We know your tricks. You might have gotten us off guard when you first showed up, but not now."
I blinked and looked around my clear prison. Alright…so apparently, Loki—well, their Loki—only came here recently. So, the Avengers aren't very well-versed in the realm of magic. That makes sense.
But if that were the case…then what exactly happened?
"Uh…" I looked to Clint and Natasha, "Wait, you didn't tell them?" I threw my hands up into the air, "What was the point of me telling you why I'm here if you don't even tell the other Avengers?"
Natasha stepped closer, "I told them, and they don't believe a word of it."
I cocked my eyebrow, "Really? Then why exactly am I here? Wearing these clothes? In this place and not attacking anything?"
Natasha folded her arms, "That's what we want to know."
I rolled my eyes, "Well evidently not."
"Don't get smart. You're still captured with no escape."
This was becoming frustrating. I had traveled a long way, and was properly famished. Avengers or no Avengers I was going to have a good time. I deserved it after all.
I snapped my fingers and those chains fell from my wrists like old wrist watches.
As the mortals say, "Let's party!"