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“hyung?” sanha calls from the end of the sofa, voice sleepy-sweet like sugar water. “take me to bed?”
“hm?” eunwoo pulls one of his earbuds out. he’s been working on a song for the past three hours. sanha keeps saying that he pushes himself too hard, like he’s got something to make up for.
maybe he does. who’s to say?
“can you take me to bed?” the younger man repeats around a yawn. his hair is messy, dyed back to dark brown now that the all light promotions have ended. it rounds out his face, and makes him look smaller. it’s eunwoo’s favorite shade on him, reminiscent to warm, chocolate candies.
the eldest nods, reaching out to place his laptop on the coffee table. it’s getting late, anyway. the sun will be rising in an hour or so. they need to break out of this all-nighter sort of habit they’ve formed over the past few weeks between horror movies at midnight and hot chocolate at dawn. sleep is important, and eunwoo will never say so aloud, but sanha is often cranky when he doesn’t get enough of it. the thought of him stomping to the bathroom for a shower with his lips jut out in a pout is enough to bring a smile to the older man’s lips. sleepy sanha has always been his favorite version.
the younger gently jabs his toe into eunwoo’s side, half-glare and creased eyebrows making him appear older. grown, but not quite. he’s getting there. eunwoo is looking out for him along the way.
“hyung, i’m so sleepy,” he whines. he’s in a gray t-shirt that doesn’t belong to him, and plaid boxers. despite his long limbs, he looks so very small. “carry me to bed.”
“carry you?” eunwoo quirks an eyebrow, slight chuckle climbing up his throat. “you’re not a baby anymore.”
“so?” sanha frowns. “you can do it. you have before.”
a flush rises to eunwoo’s cheeks. he dips his head, grateful for the dim purple-black shadows in the living room that do so well with covering up embarrassment. sanha’s not shy with the way he talks to eunwoo anymore. dropped that act a long time ago. and though he does get sheepish sometimes, he doesn’t seem to care when it comes to speaking the truth. he’s shameless as ever. has always been this way.
eunwoo stands, reaches down to swipe an arm beneath sanha’s knees, and the other under his shoulders. it takes some maneuvering, and maybe eunwoo’s legs shake a little (sanha pretends not to notice) but eventually he’s got the younger man up, and makes his way back to the bedroom, careful not to knock sanha’s head along the doorframes as they go.
the younger nuzzles his nose into eunwoo’s neck. “hyung’s strong.”
“hush. you’re only sucking up, now.”
“that’s not true,” sanha pouts, words breathed right up against eunwoo’s collarbones. “can’t i compliment you every once in a while?”
eunwoo doesn’t answer; only places sanha down onto the mattress, blankets already pulled back, and climbs in next to him. they’ve long since established who sleeps on what side. sanha likes the right because it’s closest to the heating vent, and he swears he’s always freezing cold. his icy toes pressed up against eunwoo’s bare calves are usually proof enough.
they’re only settled in for a moment or two before sanha’s sliding across the big mattress, hands outstretched until he finds eunwoo. he pulls himself close, makes fists out of eunwoo’s shirt, and rests his head on the older man’s chest. he sleeps in a ball of sorts, so his legs come up, knees nudging against eunwoo’s ribs sharply. he jolts, wincing, and sanha giggles so soft it sneaks right into eunwoo’s heart, as the younger whispers a careful, “sorry, hyung.”
and his brain goes into overdrive then, a constant mess of chaos. a tsunami waiting to attack, to destroy, to take and take. sanha is a beautiful calamity, a disaster in the making, and eunwoo knows this, has always known this, but that doesn’t change anything.
he thinks, “i’d let him break me.”
he says, “i love you.”
there’s nothing but soft breathing for a long while, sanha deadly still against his side. he thinks he’s fallen asleep, until fingers smooth out the wrinkles of his t-shirt, palms flat against his chest. his heart thumps and thumps at sanha’s touch.
he takes a big, deep breath.
be still.
sanha cranes his neck just a little to press a kiss right to the curve of eunwoo’s jaw. he whispers, “i love you most.”
and eunwoo shakes his head, makes to argue, but sanha cuts in- “let me win just this once, hyung.”
and— if it makes his baby happy. if it makes him smile.
he trails fingers down sanha’s back like warm droplets of rain, and softly says, “anything for you.”
the quiet lingers for a long, still while. eunwoo presses a kiss to the crown of the younger man’s head, and rests his eyes. night lingers on, fading slightly as it goes, subtle wisps of light streaking across the pitch black outside of their big, picture window.
that’s how they dream, all tangled together as the moon makes way for something burning bright and creamsicle orange. there’s a tickle beneath eunwoo’s ribcage, right at the base of his heart. that is where his love subsides, simmering low while he sleeps.
and behind their eyelids, stardust forms.